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(First Coast News)   "I had sex with him so he'd stop asking" is the air tight defense this smoking hot (you'd hit it) teacher is using. Bonus, caught by her husband   (firstcoastnews.com) divider line 135
    More: Florida, WPTV, GPS, mid-life crises, GPS signals, News Tribune  
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42592 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Dec 2012 at 12:39 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



135 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-12-29 03:19:58 AM  
If she was really that bad at sex, would her hubby have come looking for her?

/low self-esteem is quicker than liquor
 
2012-12-29 03:51:12 AM  
Well done subby, this story has everything. Hot teacher at a Christian school banging a student, hubby springing them via GPS technology and FLORIDA for the trifecta. Five stars.
 
2012-12-29 07:51:22 AM  
she thought that if she had sex with the teenager he would stop asking, the newspaper reported.

Riiiight. Given that pretty much ALL a teenage boy (& older ones for that matter) think about is sex, giving it up is supposed to cool him off rather than make him want more? That's some quality thinking going on there.
 
2012-12-29 08:37:05 AM  
...it's that easy?
 
2012-12-29 08:40:42 AM  
Was the GPS tracker on her dog collar?
 
2012-12-29 08:43:37 AM  
So much is making sense to me now.  I always stop asking after the first slap, and now I realize that I'm a quitter.  I need to push past that and ask until she has no option left than to submit to my salacious demands.  You really can learn a lot from kids.
 
2012-12-29 08:47:36 AM  
I guess I'd take head.
 
2012-12-29 08:54:12 AM  

Mugato: I guess I'd take head.


Everyone loves the headmistress.
 
2012-12-29 09:08:04 AM  
The carousel of derptitude that is Florida never stops, does it?
 
2012-12-29 09:23:47 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: Mugato: I guess I'd take head.

Everyone loves the headmistress.


And her name is Neely.
 
2012-12-29 09:36:00 AM  
...smoking hot?  although she has an attractive face, with as round as it is, i'm guessing she's probably about 300lbs under there.
 
2012-12-29 09:53:47 AM  
TFA: A 38-year-old teacher...Noting "midlife crisis feelings,"

Oh yeah...
 
2012-12-29 10:53:51 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: ...it's that easy?


Often yes it is. A lot of guys are on missions of conquest. Especially the really obnoxious persistent ones. They try so hard to get you in the sack and then once they've done that they avoid eye contact with you at all cost.

Its kind of funny really.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2012-12-29 10:56:27 AM  
Isn't this an old story?  I recognize the picture.  Or maybe she just got caught again?
 
2012-12-29 11:05:49 AM  

vpb: Isn't this an old story?  I recognize the picture.  Or maybe she just got caught again?


this is an old story. from last month, which is internet-old.

it was submitted repeatedly, but afaik, never greened.

so boo to subby for submitting old news
but congrats for the green
 
2012-12-29 11:09:50 AM  

Apos: The carousel of derptitude that is Florida never stops, does it?


I'd go for the old "it's something in the water" hypothesis, but it has to be something more substantial than that.
 
2012-12-29 11:16:44 AM  
15-yard penalty for abuse of the word "Hot", Subby. Replay 2nd down.
 
2012-12-29 11:19:59 AM  
Hot for Florida, Subby? Because eh...
 
2012-12-29 11:34:07 AM  
www.upload.ee
 
2012-12-29 11:44:02 AM  
After 21 years of marriage, that's about the only thing that works for me.  Mrs. Eddie Adams From Torrance usually only farks me just to shut me up.
 
2012-12-29 12:41:52 PM  

Aussie_As: Well done subby, this story has everything. Hot teacher at a Christian school banging a student, hubby springing them via GPS technology and FLORIDA for the trifecta. Five stars.


How fat are these people, that you can see them farking from space?
 
2012-12-29 12:44:04 PM  
So 'no' really DOES mean 'yes'! Or at least 'not yet'.
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2012-12-29 12:46:29 PM  
That's "Florida" hot.
 
2012-12-29 12:46:53 PM  
wonder if i keep asking sofia vergara?.....

*shakes head*

**sobbing**
 
2012-12-29 12:46:57 PM  
Noting "midlife crisis feelings," Neely told police, she thought that if she had sex with the teenager he would stop asking, the newspaper reported.

Seems legit. I suggest more studies of the phenomenon.
 
2012-12-29 12:46:59 PM  
images.wikia.com
 
2012-12-29 12:48:06 PM  
Salma Hayak, will you have sex with me?

Salma Hayak, will you have sex with me?

Salma Hayak, will you have sex with me?

Salma Hayak, will you have sex with me?
 
2012-12-29 12:48:16 PM  
The question I always ask....will the kid jerk off to this later? I say PROBABLY...so it isn't rape.
 
2012-12-29 12:50:57 PM  

ekdikeo4: ...smoking hot?  although she has an attractive face, with as round as it is, i'm guessing she's probably about 300lbs under there.


cdn.ebaumsworld.com
 
2012-12-29 12:51:07 PM  

wambu: Noting "midlife crisis feelings," Neely told police, she thought that if she had sex with the teenager he would stop asking, the newspaper reported.

Seems legit. I suggest more studies of the phenomenon.


I laughed that they had multiple encounters. So...did he stop asking and she kept sleeping with him just in case?
 
2012-12-29 12:52:31 PM  
She was just another confused women , if there was just some type of ceiling to keep these confused women from destroying society.
 
2012-12-29 12:53:13 PM  
This wouldn't have happened if she was armed.
 
2012-12-29 12:55:08 PM  
I really question the "hot teacher, you'd hit it". No way. Especially since Fark men only like anorexic women.

Secondly, if you ever have "midlife crisis feelings" and need to have sex with a child, you need to do society a favor and take yourself out. Especially if you're a teacher.
 
2012-12-29 12:58:11 PM  
It's official: the "hot" joke has jumped the shark.
 
2012-12-29 12:59:21 PM  
No she's not. No I wouldn't.


/yes I would. damn.
 
2012-12-29 01:03:09 PM  

quickdraw: FirstNationalBastard:

...it's that easy?

Often yes it is. A lot of guys are on missions of conquest. Especially the really obnoxious persistent ones. They try so hard to get you in the sack and then once they've done that they avoid eye contact with you at all cost.


Only the ones who turned out to be not worth the trouble.

Then of course there are the ones who avoid ME at all cost afterward. Even though I tell everybody ahead of time that the first time with someone new I'm too nervous to be any good: the key is sticking around or coming back for a second or third time when my performance improves markedly. (How long is too long? 45 minutes? An hour? When the KY runs out?)

Generally speaking though sex and/or dating and/or Relationships were always more trouble than they're worth and were seldom much fun for me. I broke up the last relationship ~4 years ago, and thereby retired a winner. (Don't ask about my career average though: "big boys don't cry.")

Relationships are for people with thick skins, bless their little hearts.
 
2012-12-29 01:04:04 PM  
Can you have an airtight defense with only one guy?
 
2012-12-29 01:04:22 PM  
Eddie Adams from Torrance:

After 21 years of marriage, that's about the only thing that works for me.  Mrs. Eddie Adams From Torrance usually only farks me just to shut me up.

Me too!
 
2012-12-29 01:04:57 PM  

quickdraw: FirstNationalBastard: ...it's that easy?

Often yes it is. A lot of guys are on missions of conquest. Especially the really obnoxious persistent ones. They try so hard to get you in the sack and then once they've done that they avoid eye contact with you at all cost.

Its kind of funny really.


Jeez, I said I'd call you. You're smothering me.
 
2012-12-29 01:06:27 PM  
DubyaHater and zabadu, your comments touched and cancelled each other out, sending us back in time. Nice going.
 
2012-12-29 01:06:59 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Apos: The carousel of derptitude that is Florida never stops, does it?

I'd go for the old "it's something in the water" hypothesis, but it has to be something more substantial than that.


"Something in the water"
Their called cubans.
 
2012-12-29 01:11:31 PM  
That works?
I've wasted so much of my life on unnecessarily difficult methods :(
 
2012-12-29 01:11:57 PM  

The One True TheDavid: quickdraw: FirstNationalBastard:

...it's that easy?

Often yes it is. A lot of guys are on missions of conquest. Especially the really obnoxious persistent ones. They try so hard to get you in the sack and then once they've done that they avoid eye contact with you at all cost.

Only the ones who turned out to be not worth the trouble.

Then of course there are the ones who avoid ME at all cost afterward. Even though I tell everybody ahead of time that the first time with someone new I'm too nervous to be any good: the key is sticking around or coming back for a second or third time when my performance improves markedly. (How long is too long? 45 minutes? An hour? When the KY runs out?)

Generally speaking though sex and/or dating and/or Relationships were always more trouble than they're worth and were seldom much fun for me. I broke up the last relationship ~4 years ago, and thereby retired a winner. (Don't ask about my career average though: "big boys don't cry.")

Relationships are for people with thick skins, bless their little hearts.


TMI, sir....TMI
 
2012-12-29 01:12:15 PM  
zabadu:

I really question the "hot teacher, you'd hit it". No way. Especially since Fark men only like anorexic women.

This one doesn't. E.g., Lady Gaga looks better now.


Secondly, if you ever have "midlife crisis feelings" and need to have sex with a child, you need to do society a favor and take yourself out. Especially if you're a teacher.

Since when is a 16 year old guy a CHILD? Have you ever met one?

These two "points" make you sound like a middle-aged woman who was always fat and lonely.

I'm glad my bitterness comes from years of experience with literally dozens of woman and a dozen or so men: it helps to have some idea of what you're talking about. And with all these free battle scars I don't need tattoos.
 
2012-12-29 01:13:31 PM  

The Gordie Howe Hat Trick: quickdraw: FirstNationalBastard: ...it's that easy?

Often yes it is. A lot of guys are on missions of conquest. Especially the really obnoxious persistent ones. They try so hard to get you in the sack and then once they've done that they avoid eye contact with you at all cost.

Its kind of funny really.

Jeez, I said I'd call you. You're smothering me.


[Voted as Funny.]
 
2012-12-29 01:14:57 PM  

brimed03: It's official: the "hot" joke has jumped the shark.


Shark steak?
 
2012-12-29 01:15:35 PM  

MayoSlather: So much is making sense to me now.  I always stop asking after the first slap, and now I realize that I'm a quitter.  I need to push past that and ask until she has no option left than to submit to my salacious demands.  You really can learn a lot from kids.


No means yes, she slapped you because she wants to be slapped.  This is in chapter 642 of my dating handbook, you may have missed it.
 
2012-12-29 01:16:07 PM  
I object to being told that she is "smoking hot" and that I'd "hit it". Neither of these claims are true.
How does something like this happen on Fark? Are there no standards? No decency?
 
2012-12-29 01:20:51 PM  
If we can't stop the teachers from sleeping with the students, why would we trust them with guns?
 
2012-12-29 01:23:36 PM  
weird how there's so many of these stories of female teachers having sex with their students but it seems to get such little national media.
 
2012-12-29 01:23:42 PM  

SquiggsIN: This country is so stupid. A couple centuries ago he'd have been considered an adult as soon as he could hunt and farm for himself (which was younger than 16 for thousands of years).

I keep forgetting that this is the land of enforcing your morality/ethics on others regardless of their varying beliefs.



And here is the inevitable someone complaining about the age of consent laws. Not even going to speculate over why you're so concerned about this issue.

Improper relationship between a teacher and student is a crime regardless of the student's age, because teachers have power over students and some use that to take advantage of them.
 
2012-12-29 01:23:54 PM  

zabadu: I really question the "hot teacher, you'd hit it". No way. Especially since Fark men only like anorexic women.

Secondly, if you ever have "midlife crisis feelings" and need to have sex with a child, you need to do society a favor and take yourself out. Especially if you're a teacher.


Well then, it's a good thing she didn't do that.
 
2012-12-29 01:24:09 PM  

martid4: No means yes, she slapped you because she wants to be slapped. This is in chapter 642 of my dating handbook, you may have missed it.


What chapter are the muscular clowns in?
 
2012-12-29 01:24:22 PM  

The One True TheDavid: zabadu:


Since when is a 16 year old guy a CHILD? Have you ever met one?


Yes, but only in secluded areas with my GPS-enabled smart phone.
 
2012-12-29 01:24:48 PM  

Mugato: I guess I'd take head.


red5ish: I object to being told that she is "smoking hot" and that I'd "hit it". Neither of these claims are true.
How does something like this happen on Fark? Are there no standards? No decency?


I'm going to need a picture of her before I can weigh in. This article only includes a picture of the Earth's moon.
 
2012-12-29 01:26:01 PM  

stoli n coke: SquiggsIN: This country is so stupid. A couple centuries ago he'd have been considered an adult as soon as he could hunt and farm for himself (which was younger than 16 for thousands of years).

I keep forgetting that this is the land of enforcing your morality/ethics on others regardless of their varying beliefs.


And here is the inevitable someone complaining about the age of consent laws. Not even going to speculate over why you're so concerned about this issue.

Improper relationship between a teacher and student is a crime regardless of the student's age, because teachers have power over students and some use that to take advantage of them.


But this much *is* true.

Not just from a "abuse of power" angle, but also the whole "conflict of interests" bit.  Teachers have a professional relationship with their students, same as management does over workers.  No hanky panky down the chain of command.
 
2012-12-29 01:26:02 PM  
Anyone looking for pics of a hot teacher will leave disappointed
 
2012-12-29 01:26:20 PM  

Kuroshin: zabadu: I really question the "hot teacher, you'd hit it". No way. Especially since Fark men only like anorexic women.

Secondly, if you ever have "midlife crisis feelings" and need to have sex with a child, you need to do society a favor and take yourself out. Especially if you're a teacher.

Well then, it's a good thing she didn't do that.



16 is legally designated as a child in the state of Illinois, so, yes she did.
 
2012-12-29 01:27:10 PM  

The One True TheDavid: zabadu:

I really question the "hot teacher, you'd hit it". No way. Especially since Fark men only like anorexic women.

This one doesn't. E.g., Lady Gaga looks better now.


Secondly, if you ever have "midlife crisis feelings" and need to have sex with a child, you need to do society a favor and take yourself out. Especially if you're a teacher.

Since when is a 16 year old guy a CHILD? Have you ever met one?

These two "points" make you sound like a middle-aged woman who was always fat and lonely.

I'm glad my bitterness comes from years of experience with literally dozens of woman and a dozen or so men: it helps to have some idea of what you're talking about. And with all these free battle scars I don't need tattoos.


Wow, sensitive. It was TMI, seriously. That's all I said. I made no comment about your personality, looks or anything that deserved a "fat and lonely" comment.

That being said, it is now completely apparent why you are alone.

Not fat and lonely, but if middle age is 52, guilty. I never claimed anything else. As for the "when is 16 a child"? comment: It's the law. That's it. You are considered a minor child until you are 18 years old. If you aren't smart enough to not have sex with underage children, take yourself out.

Defending a married woman who had sex with someone she teaches - well, that's white knighting at its apex. But you have a nice day.
 
2012-12-29 01:28:20 PM  

Thosw: Can you have an airtight defense with only one guy?


ZING!
 
2012-12-29 01:29:02 PM  
Funny, all I get are pepper spray and restraining orders.
 
2012-12-29 01:30:55 PM  

Gergesa: martid4: No means yes, she slapped you because she wants to be slapped. This is in chapter 642 of my dating handbook, you may have missed it.

What chapter are the muscular clowns in?


That's back in the appendix with the photographs and illustrations.
 
2012-12-29 01:34:20 PM  
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
 
2012-12-29 01:34:41 PM  

stoli n coke: Kuroshin: zabadu: I really question the "hot teacher, you'd hit it". No way. Especially since Fark men only like anorexic women.

Secondly, if you ever have "midlife crisis feelings" and need to have sex with a child, you need to do society a favor and take yourself out. Especially if you're a teacher.

Well then, it's a good thing she didn't do that.


16 is legally designated as a child in the state of Illinois, so, yes she did.


Thank you, kind person.

You may THINK 16 is not a child, but have you ever dealt with a teenager? 16 year olds aren't capable of much critical thinking that doesn't have to do with their nether regions and decision making isn't one of their strong points.

To compare our helicopter parent teens with 16 year olds of yesteryear is a moot point. When you were raised being an older bro/sis to your 8 siblings, having to get a job at 13 to help support the family, were married at 17, a parent at 18, built your own house, farmed your own land and were dead by 50...well, the comparison is just ridiculous.

Today's 16 year old isn't close to yesteryear's. Not by a long shot.
 
2012-12-29 01:35:39 PM  
She looks like Ann Romney. Before Multiple Sclerosis and Mitt.
 
2012-12-29 01:37:25 PM  
It's would only be air tight if there were two more males.
 
2012-12-29 01:37:43 PM  

zabadu: stoli n coke: Kuroshin: zabadu: I really question the "hot teacher, you'd hit it". No way. Especially since Fark men only like anorexic women.

Secondly, if you ever have "midlife crisis feelings" and need to have sex with a child, you need to do society a favor and take yourself out. Especially if you're a teacher.

Well then, it's a good thing she didn't do that.


16 is legally designated as a child in the state of Illinois, so, yes she did.

Thank you, kind person.

You may THINK 16 is not a child, but have you ever dealt with a teenager? 16 year olds aren't capable of much critical thinking that doesn't have to do with their nether regions and decision making isn't one of their strong points.

To compare our helicopter parent teens with 16 year olds of yesteryear is a moot point. When you were raised being an older bro/sis to your 8 siblings, having to get a job at 13 to help support the family, were married at 17, a parent at 18, built your own house, farmed your own land and were dead by 50...well, the comparison is just ridiculous.

Today's 16 year old isn't close to yesteryear's. Not by a long shot.


Most 40 year old women are *less* mature than 16 year old boys nowadays.
 
2012-12-29 01:37:59 PM  
/Obligatory "I should try this tactic with my wife" comment here.

zabadu:
Defending a married woman who had sex with someone she teaches - well, that's white knighting at its apex. But you have a nice day.

"Apex" doesn't mean that. I enjoy the word "nadir" myself; rolls off the tongue nicely...
 
2012-12-29 01:38:59 PM  
"I had sex with him so he'd stop asking
Thats all it takes?!
 
2012-12-29 01:40:06 PM  

WhippingBoy: zabadu: stoli n coke: Kuroshin: zabadu: I really question the "hot teacher, you'd hit it". No way. Especially since Fark men only like anorexic women.

Secondly, if you ever have "midlife crisis feelings" and need to have sex with a child, you need to do society a favor and take yourself out. Especially if you're a teacher.

Well then, it's a good thing she didn't do that.


16 is legally designated as a child in the state of Illinois, so, yes she did.

Thank you, kind person.

You may THINK 16 is not a child, but have you ever dealt with a teenager? 16 year olds aren't capable of much critical thinking that doesn't have to do with their nether regions and decision making isn't one of their strong points.

To compare our helicopter parent teens with 16 year olds of yesteryear is a moot point. When you were raised being an older bro/sis to your 8 siblings, having to get a job at 13 to help support the family, were married at 17, a parent at 18, built your own house, farmed your own land and were dead by 50...well, the comparison is just ridiculous.

Today's 16 year old isn't close to yesteryear's. Not by a long shot.

Most 40 year old women are *less* mature than 16 year old boys nowadays.


You won't get an argument with me on that point.
 
2012-12-29 01:42:45 PM  

No Such Agency: /Obligatory "I should try this tactic with my wife" comment here.

zabadu:
Defending a married woman who had sex with someone she teaches - well, that's white knighting at its apex. But you have a nice day.

"Apex" doesn't mean that. I enjoy the word "nadir" myself; rolls off the tongue nicely...


a·pex (pks)
n. pl. a·pex·es or a·pi·ces (p-sz, p-)
1. The highest point; the vertex: the apex of a triangle; the apex of a hill.
2. The point of culmination. See Synonyms at summit.
 
2012-12-29 01:45:02 PM  
zabadu:

As for the "when is 16 a child"? comment: It's the law. That's it. You are considered a minor child until you are 18 years old. If you aren't smart enough to not have sex with underage children, take yourself out.

If you're not smart enough to understand that puberty changes things, that it IS different for male "victims," and that some laws are just plain stupid you should have taken yourself out long ago. Seriously. People like you are why we can't have a free society.

She should be fired for bad judgment with a student, and that should be all.
 
2012-12-29 01:46:30 PM  
Bi(ch stole my ...

Well you know the smell.

OOh OOh That smell. Can't ya smell that smell?
 
2012-12-29 01:47:27 PM  
As far as, proper age for mating, in most of our history, women were expected to have a mate by her 'sweet 16th' 'cause if she couldn't hook one then, her odds plummeted. Men, on the other hand, had to prove their hunting/survival skills before he could claim a mate. Mostly because life was truly men brought home the bacon, and women supported their men for survival. Our laws nowadays have subverted the natural cycles, and forced men to be 30 before matrimony, and women to be the same age, so she can have a career. So much so, that, in the middle east, it's widely accepted that middle-aged men took 13yo women as wives.

The real point in this story is that it's only satisying sex for christians if the partner is dominated. another step to the subvertion of mating.
 
2012-12-29 01:48:55 PM  

SquiggsIN: This country is so stupid. A couple centuries ago he'd have been considered an adult as soon as he could hunt and farm for himself (which was younger than 16 for thousands of years).

I keep forgetting that this is the land of enforcing your morality/ethics on others regardless of their varying beliefs.


Yes, and slavery was legal, too.
And also around for thousands of years, and is still around today.

Your point is- what, exactly? Free the teacher?
 
2012-12-29 01:50:20 PM  

zabadu: I really question the "hot teacher, you'd hit it". No way. Especially since Fark men only like anorexic women.

Secondly, if you ever have "midlife crisis feelings" and need to have sex with a child, you need to do society a favor and take yourself out. Especially if you're a teacher.


If she wanted some younger dude, she should gone hunting at a local college bar. Dirty, but still legal.
 
2012-12-29 01:50:22 PM  

Eddie Adams from Torrance: After 21 years of marriage, that's about the only thing that works for me.  Mrs. Eddie Adams From Torrance usually only farks me just to shut me up.


=======================

Came here to say this same thing

/with Mrs. Zoomaster not Mrs. Eddie Adams
//You ask enough, they do give in
///then I am in
 
2012-12-29 01:51:55 PM  
As for the husband:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YwNVE37BGVE

That is all
 
2012-12-29 01:52:58 PM  

stoli n coke: Kuroshin: zabadu:

Secondly, if you ever have "midlife crisis feelings" and need to have sex with a child, you need to do society a favor and take yourself out. Especially if you're a teacher.

Well then, it's a good thing she didn't do that.

16 is legally designated as a child in the state of Illinois, so, yes she did.


Because our state legislatures are chock full of geniuses who are experts on everything.

My state's legislature approved multi-million dollar tax breaks for the Creation Museum and then later a Noah's ark theme park.
 
2012-12-29 01:53:27 PM  

TheMysticS: SquiggsIN: This country is so stupid. A couple centuries ago he'd have been considered an adult as soon as he could hunt and farm for himself (which was younger than 16 for thousands of years).

I keep forgetting that this is the land of enforcing your morality/ethics on others regardless of their varying beliefs.

Yes, and slavery was legal, too.
And also around for thousands of years, and is still around today.

Your point is- what, exactly? Free the teacher?


The "age is just a number" crowd often use it to justify a large age gap. Just because the fruit is ripe enough eat, doesn't mean you should. A teenage girl can get pregnant, but it doesn't mean she should. It made more sense when the average lifespan was far shorter.
 
2012-12-29 01:54:19 PM  
www.myfacewhen.net
 
2012-12-29 01:56:55 PM  

Apos: The carousel of derptitude that is Florida never stops, does it?


The Florida tag was invented so we'd stop picking on the craziness that is California. That, and as a specific target that the trolls could sharpen their wits on.
 
2012-12-29 01:57:17 PM  
Just to put this age thing in perspective....Hugh Hefner

'Nuff said
 
2012-12-29 01:57:53 PM  
There is a lot of crazy in the thread.
 
2012-12-29 01:58:38 PM  
www.global-air.com

According to this company, if you can no longer trust another person and you want to be sure, then it's time to take action by bugging their cell phone. (new window)
 
2012-12-29 01:59:11 PM  

MayoSlather: So much is making sense to me now.  I always stop asking after the first slap, and now I realize that I'm a quitter.  I need to push past that and ask until she has no option left than to submit to my salacious demands.  You really can learn a lot from kids.


img6.imageshack.us

It's the implication.
 
2012-12-29 01:59:16 PM  
Eddie Adams from Torrance

After 21 years of marriage, that's about the only thing that works for me. Mrs. Eddie Adams From Torrance usually only farks me just to shut me up.


That may be the saddest thing I have ever read. Why are you still married then?
 
2012-12-29 01:59:17 PM  

clowncar on fire: Apos: The carousel of derptitude that is Florida never stops, does it?

"... the trolls could sharpen their wits on.

"

That's a lot like tuning your air guitar, I'd think
 
2012-12-29 01:59:30 PM  

Mikeyworld: As far as, proper age for mating, in most of our history, women were expected to have a mate by her 'sweet 16th' 'cause if she couldn't hook one then, her odds plummeted. Men, on the other hand, had to prove their hunting/survival skills before he could claim a mate. Mostly because life was truly men brought home the bacon, and women supported their men for survival. Our laws nowadays have subverted the natural cycles, and forced men to be 30 before matrimony, and women to be the same age, so she can have a career. So much so, that, in the middle east, it's widely accepted that middle-aged men took 13yo women as wives.

The real point in this story is that it's only satisying sex for christians if the partner is dominated. another step to the subvertion of mating.


yes, we should all look to the middle east for enlightenment when it comes to women and sexuality. Maybe we should also have stonings and acid throwing as a mechanism to cope with rejection.

Consent laws exist now because teenagers' brains have not caught up to their bodies. As for what happened hundreds of years ago, I'm sure getting married at 16 wasn't a big deal then since most people wouldn't live to see 40.
 
2012-12-29 02:05:45 PM  
A 16 year old is not a child ffs...
 
2012-12-29 02:06:53 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Apos: The carousel of derptitude that is Florida never stops, does it?

I'd go for the old "it's something in the water" hypothesis, but it has to be something more substantial than that.


These are ALL people who came from elsewhere. To clog our roads and give all of us natives a bad name.
Welcome to Florida. Now go home.
 
2012-12-29 02:06:55 PM  

The One True TheDavid: stoli n coke: Kuroshin: zabadu:

Secondly, if you ever have "midlife crisis feelings" and need to have sex with a child, you need to do society a favor and take yourself out. Especially if you're a teacher.

Well then, it's a good thing she didn't do that.

16 is legally designated as a child in the state of Illinois, so, yes she did.

Because our state legislatures are chock full of geniuses who are experts on everything.

My state's legislature approved multi-million dollar tax breaks for the Creation Museum and then later a Noah's ark theme park.



Yes, a law designed to prevent perverts from taking advantage of people at the most hormonally unbalanced time in their lives is the exact same thing as funding a museum. THE EXACT. SAME. THING.

Also, I've found most of the people that harp on the unfairness of age of consent laws are trying to justify wanting to have sex with someone who is underage.
 
2012-12-29 02:06:56 PM  

darch: Eddie Adams from Torrance

After 21 years of marriage, that's about the only thing that works for me. Mrs. Eddie Adams From Torrance usually only farks me just to shut me up.

That may be the saddest thing I have ever read. Why are you still married then?


No, the saddest thing is that your penis will be kept in the refrigerator or her purse. It's the story of every married man.

You wanna do something? You wanna help? Next time ya see me on the street, do me a favor, will ya? shoot me, KILL ME, PUT ME OUTTA MY MISERY.
I'm in HELL!. HELL, I TELLS YA! ARGHHHHHH     ARGGHHH

/Rip Sam
 
2012-12-29 02:08:44 PM  
Um, I've been married for 17 years and with her for 25... we still fark almost everyday. Guess I'm lucky.
 
2012-12-29 02:17:13 PM  
"How did you get their flag?!"
"I asked for it."
"Wait...and that WORKED?"
 
2012-12-29 02:18:36 PM  

stoli n coke: Mikeyworld:  Our laws nowadays have subverted the natural cycles, and forced men to be 30 before matrimony, and women to be the same age, so she can have a career. So much so, that, in the middle east, it's widely accepted that middle-aged men took 13yo women as wives.

The real point in this story is that it's only satisying sex for christians if the partner is dominated. another step to the subvertion of mating.

yes, we should all look to the middle east for enlightenment when it comes to women and sexuality. Maybe we should also have stonings and acid throwing as a mechanism to cope with rejection.


You've never had acid thrown at your car here in America? Boy, did you miss out. Mirrors ripped of the sides, too. The stones, here in this country,  are now propelled by gunpowder, ya know. So, we ain't much different. Men and women aren't either, once ya get them outta the mores of their society

Consent laws exist now because teenagers' brains have not caught up to their bodies. As for what happened hundreds of years ago, I'm sure getting married at 16 wasn't a big deal then since most people wouldn't live to see 40.

Ya missed that entirely. People are not much different now than in 1000AD, Or 1000BCE. Our information is better distributed, but if'n you're sayin' we've evolved, well No, no we haven't. we're the same kinda guy that roamed the veld, with the same issues in mating.

You must be christain
 
2012-12-29 02:22:22 PM  

Mikeyworld: stoli n coke: Mikeyworld:  Our laws nowadays have subverted the natural cycles, and forced men to be 30 before matrimony, and women to be the same age, so she can have a career. So much so, that, in the middle east, it's widely accepted that middle-aged men took 13yo women as wives.

The real point in this story is that it's only satisying sex for christians if the partner is dominated. another step to the subvertion of mating.

yes, we should all look to the middle east for enlightenment when it comes to women and sexuality. Maybe we should also have stonings and acid throwing as a mechanism to cope with rejection.

You've never had acid thrown at your car here in America? Boy, did you miss out. Mirrors ripped of the sides, too. The stones, here in this country,  are now propelled by gunpowder, ya know. So, we ain't much different. Men and women aren't either, once ya get them outta the mores of their society

Consent laws exist now because teenagers' brains have not caught up to their bodies. As for what happened hundreds of years ago, I'm sure getting married at 16 wasn't a big deal then since most people wouldn't live to see 40.

Ya missed that entirely. People are not much different now than in 1000AD, Or 1000BCE. Our information is better distributed, but if'n you're sayin' we've evolved, well No, no we haven't. we're the same kinda guy that roamed the veld, with the same issues in mating.

You must be christain



We're not more evolved, but we are more aware of how unevolved we are at 16.
And nope, not a Christian. Just someone who got over being attracted to 16 year olds when I was 17,
 
2012-12-29 02:24:02 PM  
stoli n coke:  I've found most of the people that harp on the unfairness of age of consent laws are trying to justify wanting to have sex with someone who is underage.

Honestly, there needs to be some national standard instead of 16 in one state, 17 in another, and 18 in yet another.
 
2012-12-29 02:30:43 PM  

Apos: The carousel of derptitude that is Florida never stops, does it?


There's something in the water. Low-level meth thugs and Cubano gang members, mostly.
 
2012-12-29 02:33:48 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Apos: The carousel of derptitude that is Florida never stops, does it?

I'd go for the old "it's something in the water" hypothesis, but it has to be something more substantial than that.


I'm inclined to agree. In fact, I think it warrants serious scientific research.
 
2012-12-29 02:41:05 PM  
Would have 10 years ago. Now. Not so much.
 
2012-12-29 02:57:52 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: Mugato: I guess I'd take head.

Everyone loves the headmistress.


or the head nurse
 
2012-12-29 03:01:29 PM  
This will be the standard for hot teacher.
pointlessbanter.net
 
2012-12-29 03:07:16 PM  

stoli n coke:
[...]

Also, I've found most of the people that harp on the unfairness of age of consent laws are trying to justify wanting to have sex with someone who is underage.


How did you "find" this? A clipboard and 20 questions? How big was your sample?

As for me, my perspective has a lot to do with being a "wild" teenager in the 1970s: by the age of 16 I'd hitchhiked to Florida once and cross-country three times, the last of those to be a street hippie for 5 months. By then I'd had more "sex partners" than most men get in their lives. And though the ages varied those who were also "underage" were within a few months of my age. It's hard not to pity a guy who's still a virgin when he turns 16, let alone 18, and one good thing about a 30-odd year old married woman is she's not going to trick you into knocking her up so she can get out from under her parents. (Or just her step-dad, often enough: always insist on a paternity test.) As for the risk of pregnancy, might I point out that the "underage victim" ran no risk at all?

So the idea that a 16 year old guy needs protection from "sexual predation" by a 38 year old woman strikes me as hilarious. "Please don't throw me into that briar patch!" Regardless of who pursued who. (And as for her looks, we haven't seen him: maybe she's the one who was "settling.")

The Nanny State is running rampant with very big feet. It's time to slow it down if we can't stop it entirely.

Like I said, she should be fired for showing bad judgment and that should be it. Her husband might do well to let her make it up to him and let that be that as well. Criminal charges in such cases are a waste of the taxpayers' money.

The rest of us should be glad nobody's posted a sex video of them.
 
2012-12-29 03:08:34 PM  
Noting "midlife crisis feelings," Neely told police, she thought that if she had sex with the teenager he would stop asking

No, see, hon? that means it WORKED.
 
2012-12-29 03:17:50 PM  

Mikeyworld: clowncar on fire: Apos: The carousel of derptitude that is Florida never stops, does it?

"... the trolls could sharpen their wits on."

That's a lot like tuning your air guitar, I'd think


Now that we have youtube, air guitar has become a lost art.

MBrady: FirstNationalBastard: Mugato: I guess I'd take head.

Everyone loves the headmistress.

or the head nurse


www.demotivationalposters.org
 
2012-12-29 03:18:42 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: stoli n coke:

I've found most of the people that harp on the unfairness of age of consent laws are trying to justify wanting to have sex with someone who is underage.

Honestly, there needs to be some national standard instead of 16 in one state, 17 in another, and 18 in yet another.


14 across the board. My 14 year old girlfriend when I was that age was obviously ripe: she could literally stop traffic waiting for the bus. Sometimes she'd even accept a ride and be an hour or two late for school.

At least it should be 14 for guys anyway.

Mandatory sex education, with an emphasis on pregnancy- and disease-risk reduction, would also help.
 
2012-12-29 03:18:47 PM  
WTF?!
 
2012-12-29 03:39:25 PM  

SquiggsIN: This country is so stupid. A couple centuries ago he'd have been considered an adult as soon as he could hunt and farm for himself (which was younger than 16 for thousands of years).

I keep forgetting that this is the land of enforcing your morality/ethics on others regardless of their varying beliefs.


No, this a country that has certain beliefs of how civility works. As such has created laws that we enforce based on said civility.

If you don't like the laws, France is over there.
 
2012-12-29 04:02:52 PM  
Persistence is futile. You will be fornicated.

/story has everything but the kitchen sink; Florida just wow!
 
2012-12-29 04:03:38 PM  
She should have at least said the kid started crying and she didn't know what else to do so she popped a titty in his mouth
 
2012-12-29 04:33:33 PM  
Subby needs to get out more or else stop submitting when he/she is drunk. If it was closing time, I might hit it.
 
2012-12-29 04:38:53 PM  

The One True TheDavid: FirstNationalBastard: stoli n coke:

I've found most of the people that harp on the unfairness of age of consent laws are trying to justify wanting to have sex with someone who is underage.

Honestly, there needs to be some national standard instead of 16 in one state, 17 in another, and 18 in yet another.

14 across the board. My 14 year old girlfriend when I was that age was obviously ripe: she could literally stop traffic waiting for the bus. Sometimes she'd even accept a ride and be an hour or two late for school.

At least it should be 14 for guys anyway.

Mandatory sex education, with an emphasis on pregnancy- and disease-risk reduction, would also help.


Is she really your girlfriend, if she's everyone else's girlfriend, too?

Girl sounds like she had a lot of problems, and problem some sexual abuse at home. I guess there's a reason why she's not your wife now, instead of the girlfriend then?
 
2012-12-29 05:11:56 PM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu: The One True TheDavid: FirstNationalBastard: stoli n coke:

I've found most of the people that harp on the unfairness of age of consent laws are trying to justify wanting to have sex with someone who is underage.

Honestly, there needs to be some national standard instead of 16 in one state, 17 in another, and 18 in yet another.

14 across the board. My 14 year old girlfriend when I was that age was obviously ripe: she could literally stop traffic waiting for the bus. Sometimes she'd even accept a ride and be an hour or two late for school.
[...]

Is she really your girlfriend, if she's everyone else's girlfriend, too?


She said she was and spent most of her spare time with me, naked.


Girl sounds like she had a lot of problems, and problem some sexual abuse at home.

I kinda doubt it. "Some girls just seem to find out early... "

Seriously, you don't have to be sexually abused by an adult to get horny as a teenager. Adults were something I got around to later, when there were no gals or guys my age in the picture.


I guess there's a reason why she's not your wife now, instead of the girlfriend then?

First that was 1977; most relationships didn't survive that long even then.

Second, she ditched me because after farking twice a day for three months I decided to spend a week too stoned on downers and pot to properly meet her needs. I'd love send a message back in time "Forget the drugs! Fark Donna, you fool!" And oh: when she says she wants a threesome with your best friend but only with you there too and with him only as FWB, instead of getting jealous call him up and invite him over. I ruined a perfectly good friendship treating my bro badly as well. (Most of my girlfriends who knew him wanted to use him for his body but not be in a Relationship with him: maybe I should have pimped him out.)

I should also have been less jealous & possessive in general. I liked being taken out in cars, given pot & booze and serviced in parking lots myself. And if get twice a day what some other guy gets twice a week what skin is it off my nose? That is, my double standard sucked.

I still don't think we'd have lasted 35 years together anyway. It is possible for anyone to get tired of TheDavid.
 
2012-12-29 05:13:32 PM  
hsburns30:

Subby needs to get out more or else stop submitting when he/she is drunk. If it was closing time, I might hit it.

She's 12 years younger than me and better looking now. I'd ask politely in broad daylight sober.
 
2012-12-29 05:48:11 PM  

BolshyGreatYarblocks: So 'no' really DOES mean 'yes'! Or at least 'not yet'.


"No doesn't mean no. No means work on the neck, the nipples try back in five minutes." -D. Tosh
 
2012-12-29 05:58:05 PM  

2.bp.blogspot.com

Swinging isn't for everyone.

It has worked for us and made our relationship stronger and more intimate when we are alone together.

It satisfies our need for variety while at the same time removing the issues of distrust and jealousy.

YMMV

 
2012-12-29 06:14:02 PM  
I would possibly hit it under the right (or rather, wrong) circumstances but I would only ask to hit it once.
 
2012-12-29 07:09:15 PM  
Because everybody knows that once a teenage boy has sex, he will never want to have sex again.
 
2012-12-29 07:42:02 PM  
Old news is old... the article is from Nov. 16th.
 
2012-12-29 08:22:28 PM  

WhippingBoy: Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?
Will you have sex with me?


No. Now shut up.
 
2012-12-29 08:44:51 PM  
Glad I don't live in Florida, because no she isn't and no I wouldn't.
 
2012-12-29 08:57:38 PM  
Asking until the woman caves.


I shall deploy this strategy.
 
2012-12-29 09:36:23 PM  
Unfunny trifecta complete
 
2012-12-29 09:52:26 PM  
Should say "I had sex with him so he'd stop asking me to go away"
 
2012-12-29 10:33:48 PM  

zabadu: Today's 16 year old isn't close to yesteryear's. Not by a long shot.


Well, no, not the one you made up. Which yesteryear was this? 3300 BC? The unparalleled 1952? 1789?
 
2012-12-29 10:34:50 PM  

Jesda: Asking until the woman caves.


I shall deploy this strategy.


A lot of guys think this works.

/maybe it does
//never bothered
 
2012-12-29 10:44:21 PM  
"Smoking hot" = trap
"Smoking hot" + "(you'd hit it)" = trap
 
2012-12-29 10:45:15 PM  

illannoyin: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 319x400]

Swinging isn't for everyone. It has worked for us and made our relationship stronger and more intimate when we are alone together. It satisfies our need for variety while at the same time removing the issues of distrust and jealousy.YMMV


and thanks for the nsfw picture.
 
2012-12-29 11:12:12 PM  
FTFA: Neely explained to police that the 16-year-old, with whom she had been intimate on several occasions at her home, had kept asking for sex.

Well... yeah. If I'd been the 16 year-old boy, I would have kept asking for it, too.

Is she trying to make a point here, or is she just stating the obvious?
 
2012-12-29 11:15:14 PM  

Aussie_As: Well done subby, this story has everything. Hot teacher at a Christian school banging a student, hubby springing them via GPS technology and FLORIDA for the trifecta. Five stars.


THIS.  The Christian academy AND husband-GPS aspects of this story put it in a class by itself.

Great find, subby.
 
2012-12-30 02:00:47 AM  

Jesda: Asking until the woman caves.

I shall deploy this strategy.


It either works, or gets you sent to jail for sexual harassment.

Fortunately there are three simple rules you can follow to ensure your efforts don't end in PMITA prison:

img.photobucket.com
/since women are individuals and find different qualities attractive, it also helps to be psychic
//never ask a woman what turns them on, though, that's a sign of being unassertive and a definite turn-off
 
2012-12-30 02:51:30 PM  

Recoil Therapy: she thought that if she had sex with the teenager he would stop asking, the newspaper reported.

Riiiight. Given that pretty much ALL a teenage boy (& older ones for that matter) think about is sex, giving it up is supposed to cool him off rather than make him want more? That's some quality thinking going on there.


Well, there is no shortage of girls and women who have had the "he never called me back" experience. Even some cute ones.
 
2012-12-30 02:54:09 PM  

Fark Me To Tears: The Christian academy AND husband-GPS aspects of this story put it in a class by itself.


Since its a Christian Academy, she should have tried the "I was trying to save him from The Ghey" defense.
 
2012-12-30 03:30:37 PM  

illannoyin: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 319x400]

Swinging isn't for everyone. It has worked for us and made our relationship stronger and more intimate when we are alone together. It satisfies our need for variety while at the same time removing the issues of distrust and jealousy.YMMV


White people are goofy.
 
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