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(Miami Herald)   We're not saying the Everglades are inhospitable to humans, but staffers at the park now offer anti-vulture kits to visitors   (miamiherald.com) divider line 20
    More: Florida, Everglades, Everglades National Park, GMC Yukon, flamingos, boat trailer, Skip Snow  
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4493 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Dec 2012 at 8:59 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-29 08:41:09 AM
My car broke down on Alligator Alley at midnight with no cell service. Vultures were the least of my concerns.

/pave the Everglades
 
2012-12-29 09:05:37 AM
Weirdly, there is some chemical in windshield wipers that vultures love. We had many a pair chewed off our research vehicles before we started putting them inside when we went into the marsh.
 
2012-12-29 09:16:07 AM
Wish they offered "anti-French Canadian" kits.
 
2012-12-29 09:21:21 AM
Help! Protect us from the wildlife we came to see.

Oh, and while we're at it, can I feed potato chips to all the cute wildlife? Of course you can. Don't mind the fact that there's a sign right in front of you that says "don't feed the farking animals, douchebag!"

I'm in favor of declaring the entire state of Florida as a National Wetlands Preserve. Hunting permits for trailer trash are strictly limited to 1000 per season. First come, first served.
 
2012-12-29 09:43:30 AM
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-12-29 09:52:17 AM
Do the kits work on lawyers too?
 
2012-12-29 09:55:16 AM

Mugato: My car broke down on Alligator Alley at midnight with no cell service. Vultures were the least of my concerns.

/pave the Everglades


Yikes! I remember going out into a nature preserve for a "star party" (telescope sky viewing event) held by the local astronomers' club when I lived in West Palm Beach. I got there just after dusk, rolled into the parking area with just my curb lights on and pulled up to a berm. Only it wasn't a berm.
 
2012-12-29 10:08:01 AM
Here in Georgia some buzzards ate the shiat out of my girlfriend's motorcycle seat.

Hate the suminbeeyotches
 
2012-12-29 10:15:47 AM

tillerman35: Mugato: My car broke down on Alligator Alley at midnight with no cell service. Vultures were the least of my concerns.

/pave the Everglades

Yikes! I remember going out into a nature preserve for a "star party" (telescope sky viewing event) held by the local astronomers' club when I lived in West Palm Beach. I got there just after dusk, rolled into the parking area with just my curb lights on and pulled up to a berm. Only it wasn't a berm.


Yeah, I was with a girl so I had to not look scared but I have a pathological fear of snakes and there is a huge python epidemic in the everglades due to a few assholes that had them as pets and discarded them there. I don't care about gators,I'll fight a gator but if a python showed up, I'd throw my girlfriend at it and run.

/remove all the mammals and nuke the glades from orbit
 
2012-12-29 10:31:42 AM
Where a man can hide, and never be found
And have no fear of the bayin' hound.
But he better keep amovin' and don't stand still:
If the skeeters don't get him then the gators will.

/Runnin' like a dog through the Everglades
//Skippin' like a frog through the slimy bog
///Runnin' through the trees from the Everlys
 
2012-12-29 12:30:20 PM

HighlanderRPI: Do the kits work on lawyers too?


bada bing
 
2012-12-29 12:33:09 PM

Mugato: tillerman35: Mugato: My car broke down on Alligator Alley at midnight with no cell service. Vultures were the least of my concerns.

/pave the Everglades

Yikes! I remember going out into a nature preserve for a "star party" (telescope sky viewing event) held by the local astronomers' club when I lived in West Palm Beach. I got there just after dusk, rolled into the parking area with just my curb lights on and pulled up to a berm. Only it wasn't a berm.

Yeah, I was with a girl so I had to not look scared but I have a pathological fear of snakes and there is a huge python epidemic in the everglades due to a few assholes that had them as pets and discarded them there. I don't care about gators,I'll fight a gator but if a python showed up, I'd throw my girlfriend at it and run.

/remove all the mammals and nuke the glades from orbit


Sure, let's destroy what's left of the everglades because you're a pussy.
 
2012-12-29 12:53:29 PM
Gtheyve tried a more direct approach in the past.


i1171.photobucket.com

i1171.photobucket.com
 
2012-12-29 12:59:44 PM

serialkittenkiller: Mugato: tillerman35: Mugato: My car broke down on Alligator Alley at midnight with no cell service. Vultures were the least of my concerns.

/pave the Everglades

Yikes! I remember going out into a nature preserve for a "star party" (telescope sky viewing event) held by the local astronomers' club when I lived in West Palm Beach. I got there just after dusk, rolled into the parking area with just my curb lights on and pulled up to a berm. Only it wasn't a berm.

Yeah, I was with a girl so I had to not look scared but I have a pathological fear of snakes and there is a huge python epidemic in the everglades due to a few assholes that had them as pets and discarded them there. I don't care about gators,I'll fight a gator but if a python showed up, I'd throw my girlfriend at it and run.

/remove all the mammals and nuke the glades from orbit

Sure, let's destroy what's left of the everglades because you're a pussy.


I'm glad you agree.
 
2012-12-29 01:32:03 PM
A little something I learned after moving to Southwest Florida: Turkey vultures can pick a corpse clean in under 5 hours.
 
2012-12-29 02:26:36 PM
i131.photobucket.com
 
2012-12-29 05:10:00 PM

HighlanderRPI: Do the kits work on lawyers too?


Vultures will only eat their own kind if they're reaaaally hungry.
 
2012-12-29 06:06:15 PM

KidneyStone: Here in Georgia some buzzards ate the shiat out of my girlfriend's motorcycle seat.

Hate the suminbeeyotches


Maybe your girlfriend should wear diapers.
 
2012-12-29 06:16:54 PM

Mugato: serialkittenkiller: Mugato: tillerman35: Mugato: My car broke down on Alligator Alley at midnight with no cell service. Vultures were the least of my concerns.

/pave the Everglades

Yikes! I remember going out into a nature preserve for a "star party" (telescope sky viewing event) held by the local astronomers' club when I lived in West Palm Beach. I got there just after dusk, rolled into the parking area with just my curb lights on and pulled up to a berm. Only it wasn't a berm.

Yeah, I was with a girl so I had to not look scared but I have a pathological fear of snakes and there is a huge python epidemic in the everglades due to a few assholes that had them as pets and discarded them there. I don't care about gators,I'll fight a gator but if a python showed up, I'd throw my girlfriend at it and run.

/remove all the mammals and nuke the glades from orbit

Sure, let's destroy what's left of the everglades because you're a pussy.

I'm glad you agree.


Well, if you're gonna be nice about it, then why not. Do we really need all that nature and drinking water and shiat in So. Fla.?
 
2012-12-30 12:25:26 AM

Mugato: My car broke down on Alligator Alley at midnight with no cell service. Vultures were the least of my concerns.

/pave the Everglades


Alligator Alley (I-75) is a busy toll road, even at night.  Get stuck out in the middle of the Tamiami Trail (US-41) at three in the morning.  Of course, if you're in the right spot, the panthers should protect you from the pythons, but I think they defer to the gators.
 
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