It was a dark and stormy night . . .

This part cracked me up..."and then
rushed inside of the Manufactured Home"...
Aren't all homes manufactured? Or do some just magically appear? :)

Maestro's Girl: This part cracked me up..."and then
rushed inside of the Manufactured Home"...
Aren't all homes manufactured? Or do some just magically appear? :)

well...prefab or mobile or modular....take your pick.

Prefab homes can be in the million dollar range.

You're a cop, not a writer for Saturday Night Live.

I don't mind a cop enjoying his work with a keyboard over, say, a truncheon.

Penis mightier.

When you _live_ in Florida, this really is just like any other Thursday.

Fat-D: Maestro's Girl: This part cracked me up..."and then
rushed inside of the Manufactured Home"...
Aren't all homes manufactured? Or do some just magically appear? :)

well...prefab or mobile or modular....take your pick.

Prefab homes can be in the million dollar range.

Fark! :( I was hoping for a magcial home.
/illusion shattered

BarkingUnicorn: 50 Shades of Blue


Funny'd :3

This thread needs....

Money For Nothing

That was floridly unreadable.

You're not getting paid by the syllable, dude.

Heh, glad to see a man taking some joy in the most mundane aspects of his work.

Why would anyone stop drinking for three full days? Dazes , Daisies. Uh nevermind.

I laughed out loud at some of it. Well done, sir.

gadian: Heh, glad to see a man taking some joy in the most mundane aspects of his work.

Lord above, if you don't laugh sometimes, you'll end up crying!

Shenanigans

Lenny_da_Hog: Unalaska Police Blotter is better.

Oh gods, you are so right. Now I'm hooked.

13 November, Tuesday
0125 - Suspicious Person/Activity - An amorous bloke who in a misguided attempt to attract a mate placed his genitals on full, flapping display in the roadway instead caught the attention of a passing police officer. The luckless lad was allowed to leave without charges since the intended victim couldn't be offended by what she couldn't see

skinink: You're a cop, not a writer for Saturday Night Live.

You write, he's better.

red5ish: Manufactured housing (commonly known as mobile homes in the United States) is a type of prefabricated housing that is largely assembled in factories and then transported to sites of use. The definition of the term in the United States is regulated by federal law (Code of Federal Regulations, 24 CFR 3280): "Manufactured homes are built as dwelling units of at least 320 square feet (30 m2) in size with a permanent chassis to assure the initial and continued transportability of the home."[1] The requirement to have a wheeled chassis permanently attached differentiates "manufactured housing" from other types of prefabricated homes, such as modular homes.



This message brought to you by the letter N, Mexico, and Baby's First sensual oil..

Arcata Eye Police Log

http://www.arcataeye.com/category/police-log/

Down here in a recent report, the officer wrote the arrestee is a "sioux chef."

the next time i'm down florida way i think i'll try to get arrested by this guy. just to read the report.

Keys dude: Down here in a recent report, the officer wrote the arrestee is a "sioux chef."

That could go either way. So which was it?

I hate alliteration.

Not bad. Once read the police report of a person for having sex in public. She met the guy earlier in the evening and they left the bar in her Mazda Miata to have sex . . . with the top down. Anyway, the police reports states that the officer saw the car parked in an empty lot, well past midnight, and "fearing for the moral fiber of young America" (never forgot that line) he went to investigate. He saw "suspect 1 bouncing violently in the lap of suspect 2 with suspect 2's lips affixed to the exposed breast of suspect 1." Anyway, they were both arrested. She had to have her boyfriend come bail her out. End csb.

/it wasn't me (suspect 2 or the boyfriend)
//it wasn't my girlfriend

Notabunny: fta "After being repudiated, the puzzled paramedics packed up the paraphernalia ... and proceeded to part ways with the patient."

A thing of beauty ...

I think the officer reads Fark just for the Will Greenlee articles. He was probably the submitter too.

/ all I wanted for X-mas was a Out The Subby Button.
// Once again Santa has failed me.
/// Maybe I have to ask Cupid or the Easter Bunny.

SirTanon: "The night was moist..."

Gah!

Report is is just stunning. 'A' for effort.

I hate it when people who almost know the language think they know the language.

Warning: If you read the actual report, there's a fairly gruesome injury description in there. But here's a link straight to the goods: Link (PDF)

Oh yeah, and whoever mentioned the Unalaska blotter upthread, that is pure gold. Quick background - Unalaska is a fishing port out in the Aleutians and is mostly populated by drunken sailors who are not natives of Alaska or even sometimes the U.S. They all get paid pretty well from the fishing fleets and most of their living expenses are paid for by the company, plus it's Alaska, so they all get trashed regularly and have amusing adventures. These events sometimes require police intervention, who generally police the whole town with a somewhat tolerant, amused eye, like campus police at a party school. A ton of the calls are tossing people out of places - giving trespassing warnings and the like when somebody's been 86'd from the bar or fired and kicked out of the bunkhouse.