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(Curbed)   The most gloriously hideous real estate listings of 2012, including our grand prize winner from Sulphur, Louisiana. And that's quite a prize in a field with entrants from LA, Miami Beach--and the faux chateau island retreat designed by Celine Dion   (curbed.com) divider line 166
    More: Scary, Los Angeles, chateau, private island, prizes  
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32101 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Dec 2012 at 8:25 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-27 04:40:53 PM  
I can excuse Houston in that it looks like it hasn't been updated since the 1970s - yes, metallic wallpaper was hot in the 70s.  I had a friend whose home was unchanged like that after his mother died.

The rest seem to be people who didn't get that the director's choice of decor in "Scarface" wasn't meant to be complimentary.
 
2012-12-27 04:43:15 PM  
I guess if you have to live in Sulphur, may as well go for it. I didn't the respirator rack, must be quite nice.
 
2012-12-27 04:57:48 PM  

simplicimus: I guess if you have to live in Sulphur, may as well go for it. I didn't the respirator rack, must be quite nice.


The whole Lake Charles area of Louisiana is actually really nice.
 
2012-12-27 05:01:16 PM  

downstairs: simplicimus: I guess if you have to live in Sulphur, may as well go for it. I didn't the respirator rack, must be quite nice.

The whole Lake Charles area of Louisiana is actually really nice.


Oh, I know. And the air seems a lot cleaner than it used to be.
 
2012-12-27 05:24:11 PM  
The shot of just the staircase in the Brooklyn one is really pretty--until you realize there's an entire floor's worth of marble, etched glass, and upholstered junk you have to pass before you even get to it.
 
2012-12-27 05:40:52 PM  
Jesus - who are their realtors? Why are half of the shots done in surrealist HDR? They do want to sell these piles of shiat I presume... so why the amateur hour photos?
 
2012-12-27 05:48:07 PM  

Elzar: Jesus - who are their realtors? Why are half of the shots done in surrealist HDR? They do want to sell these piles of shiat I presume... so why the amateur hour photos?


No one wants to pay for professional photography. Just like Graphic Designers, Photographers are now victims of the digital age-it's easy to shoo and put on the Internet or provide to a printer.  People haven't realized that a tool is only as good as it's user.
 
2012-12-27 06:20:30 PM  

Elzar: Jesus - who are their realtors? Why are half of the shots done in surrealist HDR? They do want to sell these piles of shiat I presume... so why the amateur hour photos?


You're right, but depressingly most of these pictures are pretty good compared to the majority of listings. It's incredible how many listings - even million-dollar homes - were obviously shot with somebody's iPhone. And when they *do* hire someone, it's usually some friend of the realtors', a bored housewife with a DSLR, a copy of Photoshop, and absolutely no idea how to use light or stage a room.  And especially no concept of when to stop with the saturation.

(If I sound bitter it's because my wife actually does real-estate photography, and it's tough for her to get jobs.)
 
2012-12-27 06:22:10 PM  
Aaaahahahaha!  The glass monstrosity in Mukilteo made the list.
 
2012-12-27 06:23:25 PM  
cdn.cstatic.net

This one looks like a child's playroom. If your child drank a lot, that is.
 
2012-12-27 07:35:59 PM  

fusillade762: This one looks like a child's playroom. If your child drank a lot, that is.


In other words, the perfect place for Farkers to hang out
 
2012-12-27 08:32:45 PM  

WhyteRaven74: fusillade762: This one looks like a child's playroom. If your child drank a lot, that is.

In other words, the perfect place for Farkers to hang out


Compared to all the other "make my house look like a set from a Victorian period piece" houses listed, that one is great. No chandeliers or grand piano, just good straight up, "you know what? I want a bar that looks like a space station as envisioned in the 1950s and I can."

The mirror on the ceiling over the bed the other hand.... c'mon now, that's just tacky.
 
2012-12-27 08:35:19 PM  
Money can't buy happiness. Nor taste, it would seem.
 
2012-12-27 08:35:50 PM  
In 2003, you could've bought this for $1.4m in Red Lodge, Montana:

3.bp.blogspot.com

Does it look familiar at all?

It's where Teddy Roosevelt lived during his "Montana Days", when he would talk about plotting the boundaries that would become the first "open-access preserve" (The Beartooth Mountains), and Yellowstone Park's expansion.

It's symbol of a moose is used in reference to Roosevelt.
 
2012-12-27 08:35:51 PM  
Chateau D'or was very ornate. It looked like a Titanic set. Woudl visit any of these houses. The glass one in mukilteo is probably really expensive to heat.
 
2012-12-27 08:35:57 PM  
Should I be shamed for actually liking the Olympia, WA one?

Sure, it's disgustingly lavish, but they picked an interesting theme and executed it pretty well.
 
2012-12-27 08:36:09 PM  
proof positive: some peoples taste is all in their mouth.
 
2012-12-27 08:36:11 PM  

WhyteRaven74: fusillade762: This one looks like a child's playroom. If your child drank a lot, that is.

In other words, the perfect place for Farkers to hang out


Meh. It's missing a ball pit.
 
2012-12-27 08:36:43 PM  
That one in Brooklyn is just... wtf?
 
2012-12-27 08:36:49 PM  

mr intrepid: Money can't buy happiness. Nor taste, it would seem.


50% of my family and friends are millionaires, and the other 50% are impoverished.
It's true.

It can't but you mental health, either.
Sadly.
 
2012-12-27 08:37:41 PM  

fusillade762: [cdn.cstatic.net image 500x333]

This one looks like a child's playroom. If your child drank a lot, that is.


The Boozer Barbie playset.
I always wanted one.
 
2012-12-27 08:37:58 PM  

Jedekai: In 2003, you could've bought this for $1.4m in Red Lodge, Montana:

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 640x480]

Does it look familiar at all?

It's where Teddy Roosevelt lived during his "Montana Days", when he would talk about plotting the boundaries that would become the first "open-access preserve" (The Beartooth Mountains), and Yellowstone Park's expansion.

It's symbol of a moose is used in reference to Roosevelt.


The Pollard's an amazing little hotel.
 
2012-12-27 08:38:39 PM  
Most of them look quite nice. The purple monster is not to my taste but I would probably take it over my own house.
 
2012-12-27 08:41:13 PM  
Oh, these are beyond awesome.
 
2012-12-27 08:41:21 PM  
Swamplot.com does "bad listing photos" almost every day and some of them are pretty hysterical:

swamplot.com

swamplot.com

Just as a few examples...
 
2012-12-27 08:41:58 PM  
I actually didn't think the Celine Dion one was bad at all! I mean, a little more 'oppulent' than my tastes, but I didn't think it was ugly.

And to be honest, I loved the stone castley "dining room"
 
2012-12-27 08:42:08 PM  
The Mukilteo, Wash one (the first set of pics) is kinda cool. I wouldn't pay $1.89M for it, but I'd live in it, sure, and enjoy it, too.
 
2012-12-27 08:42:20 PM  
Sure it's ugly, but it has the Emperor's window from the Death Star. How can that be bad?

cdn.cstatic.net
 
2012-12-27 08:42:42 PM  

CmndrFish: Should I be shamed for actually liking the Olympia, WA one?

Sure, it's disgustingly lavish, but they picked an interesting theme and executed it pretty well.


I like that some people want a completely out of date style in their home and have the money to do it. The biggest issue with that Olympia one is that horrible face painting that dominates the room. Otherwise, I think some of these are pretty and pretty interesting. That 70s one was pretty hysterical, like if some 70s swinger suddenly came into money and wanted to make the most MODERN house ever!
 
2012-12-27 08:44:50 PM  
That huge mansion in Houston is only $499,000.00? Seems like a bargain unless there are very serious issues.
 
2012-12-27 08:45:08 PM  
The Sulphur house's crenellations would be ideal for sniping from. Of course, that's what they're for.
 
2012-12-27 08:45:42 PM  
cdn.cstatic.net

It's creepy and it's kookie,
Mysterious and spooky,
All together ookie,
It's Celine Dion's house.

*snap* *snap*
 
2012-12-27 08:45:56 PM  

BadReligion: That huge mansion in Houston is only $499,000.00? Seems like a bargain unless there are very serious issues.


Nah, that's just Houston prices. I think it is outside of the loop, that knocks off like 200k from the price right there.
 
2012-12-27 08:46:03 PM  
I have no taste. Those all looked cool.
 
2012-12-27 08:46:17 PM  

Osomatic: Elzar: Jesus - who are their realtors? Why are half of the shots done in surrealist HDR? They do want to sell these piles of shiat I presume... so why the amateur hour photos?

You're right, but depressingly most of these pictures are pretty good compared to the majority of listings. It's incredible how many listings - even million-dollar homes - were obviously shot with somebody's iPhone. And when they *do* hire someone, it's usually some friend of the realtors', a bored housewife with a DSLR, a copy of Photoshop, and absolutely no idea how to use light or stage a room.  And especially no concept of when to stop with the saturation.

(If I sound bitter it's because my wife actually does real-estate photography, and it's tough for her to get jobs.)


I do landscape photography as a hobby. Recently I met a kid who'd made a solid start in real estate photography by virtue of having a little UAV. He asked for advice, so after a look at some listings I mentioned lighting at different times of day and filters to make them pop - it was all totally new to him. But the realtors are clueless.

I see the worst pictures on listings. I like my realtor a lot, but still, one look at the shots he took with his pocket camera and I went ahead and sent my own set to him. You'd think pictures that at least make the rooms look as big as possible would justify the price of a good camera and lens combo.
 
2012-12-27 08:47:00 PM  
At first glance none of them look that bad. If you can afford any of these I doubt you'd care what "common folks" say about it.
 
2012-12-27 08:47:12 PM  
The movie basement is completely awesome.
 
2012-12-27 08:51:45 PM  
I recently bought a home. I picked location, price range, rooms and bathrooms etc. Then I made my realtor show me everything in that range.

Who wouldn't still see a home simply because of shiatty, obviously shiatty no less, pics?
 
2012-12-27 08:52:47 PM  
buntz:
I actually didn't think the Celine Dion one was bad at all! I mean, a little more 'oppulent' than my tastes, but I didn't think it was ugly.

And to be honest, I loved the stone castley "dining room"


That''s probably her version of "subdued".

/Celine Dion, while she's a cheesy singer with terrible aesthetic sense, is not, I think, a bad person, and I have a hard time speaking ill of her.
 
2012-12-27 08:52:58 PM  
ew, yuck. a curbed article.
 
2012-12-27 08:53:24 PM  
Anyways, if I photographed the most beautiful valley in the world the way most realtors do houses you'd go "meh, looks okay".
 
2012-12-27 08:53:26 PM  
I'm pretty sure I've seen pornos shot at most of these locations.
 
2012-12-27 08:54:48 PM  

ProfessorOhki: WhyteRaven74: fusillade762: This one looks like a child's playroom. If your child drank a lot, that is.

In other words, the perfect place for Farkers to hang out

Compared to all the other "make my house look like a set from a Victorian period piece" houses listed, that one is great. No chandeliers or grand piano, just good straight up, "you know what? I want a bar that looks like a space station as envisioned in the 1950s and I can."

The mirror on the ceiling over the bed the other hand.... c'mon now, that's just tacky.


Still? Damn, might want to windex that thing before the open house.
 
2012-12-27 08:56:10 PM  

Skirl Hutsenreiter: I do landscape photography as a hobby. Recently I met a kid who'd made a solid start in real estate photography by virtue of having a little UAV. He asked for advice, so after a look at some listings I mentioned lighting at different times of day and filters to make them pop - it was all totally new to him. But the realtors are clueless.


Pretty sure commercial UAS flight isn't allowed by the FAA so my advice would be to not get caught.
 
2012-12-27 08:56:40 PM  

ProfessorOhki: WhyteRaven74: fusillade762: This one looks like a child's playroom. If your child drank a lot, that is.

In other words, the perfect place for Farkers to hang out

Compared to all the other "make my house look like a set from a Victorian period piece" houses listed, that one is great. No chandeliers or grand piano, just good straight up, "you know what? I want a bar that looks like a space station as envisioned in the 1950s and I can."

The mirror on the ceiling over the bed the other hand.... c'mon now, that's just tacky.


Pfft.. you never comb hair in bed?
 
2012-12-27 08:57:07 PM  
Some of those are beautiful homes being covered up by shiatty decorating and '70s-'80s tile and wall coverings. Seriously who buys a $25 million home and can't afford to get rid of old, mildued bathroom tile?
 
2012-12-27 08:58:11 PM  

BadReligion: That huge mansion in Houston is only $499,000.00? Seems like a bargain unless there are very serious issues.


The only very serious issue I can think of is that you're living in Houston.
 
2012-12-27 08:58:59 PM  

fusillade762: [cdn.cstatic.net image 500x333]

This one looks like a child's playroom. If your child drank a lot, that is.


Screams "1980s leftover" to me. Rooms like that are to the 1980s what Harvest Gold and Avocado Green appliances were to the 1970s.

/misses lovelylisting.com
 
2012-12-27 09:05:18 PM  

Ima4nic8or: Most of them look quite nice.


Let's go down the list, shall we?
Lead picture (unidentified) looks like a Guido casino.
You'll probably find frozen corpses next to the South African frozen half losbster tails in the freezer.
And nothing says Tacky Shiat like South African frozen half losbster tails in the freezer.
OK?
#2, the Miami Beach, $35M, is a pretentious, piece of shait that would be used in the "Layer Cake" as a country club, Fortunately, the producers of that movie knew what a budget was.
Chateau d'Or, Los Angeles, $25M comes in next, looking like a Dago whore house designed by Scarface.
#3: Destin, Fla., $2.295M. Don't get me started on the cheesy attempt at upholstery or the fact that the fireplace doesn't even have a wood box or wood rack near it. I'm not even clicking on the time wasting little jpegs here. No need to waste my life when people who have more money than they have taste buy crap like this. And time, is, money.
Fort Lauderdale, Fla. comes in at #4 as Scarface's second home. The one he reserved for his Shiksa whore mistress. Piece of crap should be used as a hotel for people who want to treat the mistress to a "Romantic" get away while the wife thinks he's out on a "business trip"
Bleah.
Carmel, Ind., $5.5M is boozer Barbie, covered that one already.
#6: Oh, great. I got loaded and won big at the craps table and told the cabbie to I-Phone the nicest place in town and put me up. Slipped him a C-Note, and woke up...
UNDERWATER! GAAAAAAAAAAhhhhhhhhhhh.
Who puked the wallpaper?
Trompe-l'œil, my ass. It's like waking up in a farking fish bowl!!!
/better be a long assed snorkel under my pillow.

Still with me here?
Houson,(sic) Texas, $499K, logs in at #7, looking like everyone who ever married a Bush left a snail trail on the toilet seat and every one who was a Bush peed in the shower.
#8: Brooklyn, N.Y., $14M. I can't imagine having money and wanting to live in farking Brooklyn, but I like this one. I like it for a BDSM porno shoot.
#9 is Indianapolis, Ind., $980K. Miss Indiana apparently married and old geezer who thought she needed a cheesy palace to go with her cheesy tiara. Christ on crutches, How about a security system for the garage? Don't leave the Bentley out in the Indiana winter with a 40' Roof over it.
#10: *clears throat* Sulphur, La., $5.2M. O.K, Now. Liberace just called from beyond th grave to say, "Too Gay". This will be reposted on a famous Star Trek actor's timeline on Facebook in a few days, I'm sure.

And now that I' at the end of the list, it's apparent that despite the mispellings, the author of the article has no idea how to write, because all the descriptions are below the titles.

Fark it all and you have no taste.

I say good day, Madman.
GOOD DAY!
 
2012-12-27 09:05:36 PM  
So Prince used to have a house in Carmel, Indiana?
 
2012-12-27 09:06:53 PM  

Shadyman: The Mukilteo, Wash one (the first set of pics) is kinda cool. I wouldn't pay $1.89M for it, but I'd live in it, sure, and enjoy it, too.


Thought the same thing. Maybe I'm just a sucker for stained glass, because I thought that house didn't deserve to be on the list.
 
2012-12-27 09:08:34 PM  
Going to forward this to Mrs. Quito.

/She loves the real estate porn
//The raunchier the better
///slashies
 
2012-12-27 09:08:36 PM  

JohnAnnArbor: So Prince used to have a house in Carmel, Indiana?


too gay
 
2012-12-27 09:15:03 PM  
jumpin jehosaphat
 
2012-12-27 09:18:51 PM  
img685.imageshack.us
img826.imageshack.us
This is a lovely room of death.
 
2012-12-27 09:19:30 PM  
Goes to show ya -- trophy wives have no sense of style.
 
2012-12-27 09:19:36 PM  

CmndrFish: Should I be shamed for actually liking the Olympia, WA one?

Sure, it's disgustingly lavish, but they picked an interesting theme and executed it pretty well.


I thought the same.  It's too over-the-top for me, but they seem to have gotten the flooring and proportions correct.  I was surprised to see a few decent rooms in Celine's pad, too.
 
2012-12-27 09:24:29 PM  
What I find wild is how cheap real estate is in some locations. Houston for under $500K? In Toronto, you would need to add a hundred K or two to buy a detached house in my old area. It's a decent area, but not horridly expensive for Toronto. Under 1 million for that mess in Indy? Good lord, you couldn't get anything near that size for that price.

That people have horrible taste and stage things terribly is no shock at all - the prices for some IS!

/We sold our 850 sq ft house (3 stories, 2 bedrooms) for 300K over a year ago - and it was a dump. Not even a pretense at decoration.
 
2012-12-27 09:25:37 PM  

ProfessorOhki: Skirl Hutsenreiter: I do landscape photography as a hobby. Recently I met a kid who'd made a solid start in real estate photography by virtue of having a little UAV. He asked for advice, so after a look at some listings I mentioned lighting at different times of day and filters to make them pop - it was all totally new to him. But the realtors are clueless.

Pretty sure commercial UAS flight isn't allowed by the FAA so my advice would be to not get caught.



There's a hobby ceiling. You can go up to 500ft or something like that.

www.blogcdn.com
 
2012-12-27 09:25:39 PM  
They may need redecorating, but I'd live in every one of those.

And yes, compared to an 1100 sq ft condo for 500k in DC, that Houston house is a steal. And it's not that ugly...
 
2012-12-27 09:27:13 PM  
Some of these are nice.
 
kth
2012-12-27 09:28:58 PM  
Wait, doesn't everyone keep their battle axe and mace above the urinals?
 
2012-12-27 09:32:14 PM  

Xetal: The movie basement is completely awesome.


But what is it with the obsession to have a movie basement exactly like a movie theatre, including the same crappy movie seats (looking at the Nassau Bay one)? The whole point of having a home theatre is for the relaxing comfortable area to watch a movie.
 
2012-12-27 09:34:13 PM  
I like all of these, frankly.
 
2012-12-27 09:35:40 PM  

Skirl Hutsenreiter: Anyways, if I photographed the most beautiful valley in the world the way most realtors do houses you'd go "meh, looks okay".


thats because realtors, who stand to make thousands on a sale, would rather use their cell phone than hire a real photographer for a few hundred dollars. But then again, you cant expect much forethought for someone with a GED and a certificate from a weekend-long agent course.
 
2012-12-27 09:36:45 PM  

buntz: I actually didn't think the Celine Dion one was bad at all! I mean, a little more 'oppulent' than my tastes, but I didn't think it was ugly.

And to be honest, I loved the stone castley "dining room"


seconded, although I can't figure out the exposed bathtub on the stair landing.
 
2012-12-27 09:38:27 PM  
A couple of the "chateau" ones (including the one with it in the name) did an excellent job of replicating that look. There was one bedroom in particular that was a solid imitation.

Granted most of the shiat that ought to be stone or solid wood is probably MDF and plaster or some other smoke and mirrors BS, but bad? I guess if you don't like that look.
 
2012-12-27 09:38:41 PM  
Sulphur, La house made me LOL. Look at the grout joints in the kitchen image.
 
2012-12-27 09:41:30 PM  
THIS is EXACTLY why TAXES need to be RAISED on the RICH... and significantly!

IF and WHEN they spend their money they cannot be trusted with their decisions!
 
2012-12-27 09:42:37 PM  

Shadyman: The Mukilteo, Wash one (the first set of pics) is kinda cool. I wouldn't pay $1.89M for it, but I'd live in it, sure, and enjoy it, too.


I liked that one, too. I wouldn't want to have to wash all that glass but I can see the appeal of "enclosing outdoor space" in Washington. Give a big FU to the rain and snow. Oh, I wouldn't want to pay the heating bill, either.
 
2012-12-27 09:43:41 PM  
Lots of money, absolutely no taste. Although for the "oppulant" look, the Celine Dion house looks OK.

Why do I get the feeling that the castle house was designed by its owners? I would fill it with arcade games and skee-ball. Or be like that guy in Garden State with no furniture, driving from room to room in a golf cart.
 
2012-12-27 09:45:15 PM  

ProfessorOhki: Skirl Hutsenreiter: I do landscape photography as a hobby. Recently I met a kid who'd made a solid start in real estate photography by virtue of having a little UAV. He asked for advice, so after a look at some listings I mentioned lighting at different times of day and filters to make them pop - it was all totally new to him. But the realtors are clueless.

Pretty sure commercial UAS flight isn't allowed by the FAA so my advice would be to not get caught.


FAA only regulates above a certain height. Useful real estate photographs all fall well under that height.
 
2012-12-27 09:48:42 PM  
Giant stereo, mirrors on the ceiling. They may still live with their parents, but the ladies LOVE this room.

cdn.cstatic.net
 
2012-12-27 09:57:38 PM  
If I was forced to live in one of them, I'd pick the first one. Yeah, the outside is ugly, but the kitchen looks functional and the windows all have nice views. It's not so ornate that I'd feel suffocated, and you could put pretty normal furniture in there without it looking out of place.

That said, Celine Dion's was well done for the style and I don't understand quite why it was on the list. There are actual old stone buildings in Montreal so it's not like it's entirely out of place either.
 
2012-12-27 09:59:49 PM  

Darth_Lukecash: No one wants to pay for professional photography. Just like Graphic Designers, Photographers are now victims of the digital age-it's easy to shoo and put on the Internet or provide to a printer. People haven't realized that a tool is only as good as it's user.


Word.

I toyed with the idea of quitting my day job and doing photography full time. Then I realized that I didn't want to take a 80% pay cut, and would rather shoot my subjects on my terms rather than anyone else's. I do the odd portrait sitting or commercial gig, if it's something that interests me, but other than that I just refer people to my friends who are trying to make a living at it.
 
2012-12-27 09:59:58 PM  

dumbobruni: seconded, although I can't figure out the exposed bathtub on the stair landing.


You pompous ass! Like you never were walking downstairs and thought to yourself "You know? I don't feel as fresh as I should"

It's people like you.........
 
2012-12-27 10:05:21 PM  
Having done some work there, I can tell you that many of the houses in destin are similar to the one shown.

Rednecks with money almost always results in poor decisions. Look at the guy who bought the Browns.
 
2012-12-27 10:05:30 PM  

Skirl Hutsenreiter: ProfessorOhki: Skirl Hutsenreiter: I do landscape photography as a hobby. Recently I met a kid who'd made a solid start in real estate photography by virtue of having a little UAV. He asked for advice, so after a look at some listings I mentioned lighting at different times of day and filters to make them pop - it was all totally new to him. But the realtors are clueless.

Pretty sure commercial UAS flight isn't allowed by the FAA so my advice would be to not get caught.

FAA only regulates above a certain height. Useful real estate photographs all fall well under that height.


You could be right. I've only caught bits in passing: Link
 
2012-12-27 10:06:04 PM  
The Dion house is quite beautiful. Most of the others had decorators more familiar with the Focal-Point catalog than a sense of scale or understanding of ornament.

Professional photographers make all the difference with a listing. Mine looked unbelievable after the professional took them.
 
2012-12-27 10:16:06 PM  

fallingcow: Granted most of the shiat that ought to be stone or solid wood is probably MDF and plaster or some other smoke and mirrors BS, but bad? I guess if you don't like that look.


IIRC Jefferson used faux finishes at Monticello. For that matter, the majority of his art collection was reproductions, not originals.
 
2012-12-27 10:20:43 PM  
Ummm.....did anyone notice the naked chick at the bottom of the page who takes pictures of herself?
 
2012-12-27 10:23:35 PM  
i like the castle
 
2012-12-27 10:24:51 PM  
Lots of purple in these photos, is the sister from Breaking Bad an interior decorator now?
 
2012-12-27 10:27:38 PM  

gerbilpox: [img685.imageshack.us image 634x416]
[img826.imageshack.us image 149x172]
This is a lovely room of death.


A bunch of that has to be fake. Proudly-displayed elephant tusks? I think not. The fluorescent lighting is a nice touch, to give the room that discount showroom feel.
 
2012-12-27 10:31:43 PM  

moonscatter: BadReligion: That huge mansion in Houston is only $499,000.00? Seems like a bargain unless there are very serious issues.

Nah, that's just Houston prices. I think it is outside of the loop, that knocks off like 200k from the price right there.


Its in the Heights, in the loop (77008)... i am surprised it is just that price... depending on what section of the Heights, that house could go for 3x's that price...
The Purple Monstrosity is in Nassau Bay... right across from NASA... first thing my husband said when he saw the pics.. "does an Astronaut live there?"... No, but a guy who does custom body paint for cars does...
 
2012-12-27 10:36:20 PM  
Darth_LukecashPeople haven't realized that a tool is only as good as it's user.

Like the apostrophe.
 
2012-12-27 10:36:37 PM  
The one in Brooklyn appears to have two king sized beds in the master bed room.
 
2012-12-27 10:37:13 PM  

buntz: dumbobruni: seconded, although I can't figure out the exposed bathtub on the stair landing.

You pompous ass! Like you never were walking downstairs and thought to yourself "You know? I don't feel as fresh as I should"

It's people like you.........


something fishy is going on there.
 
2012-12-27 10:39:00 PM  
Huh. I thought this is what Celine Dion's house looked like:

i860.photobucket.com
I must have been wrong.
 
2012-12-27 10:42:34 PM  
The comments about the $499k one make me wonder if the commenters are realizing the labels are below the pictures, not above. In case someone was confused, the Texas $499k house is the 3000sq foot one with all of the wallpaper, it has a normal looking kitchen with breakfast nook. The one below it is a 24k sq foot mansion that Celine Dion owned on a private island.

The Carmel one was my favorite. The owner looks like s/he has a great sense of humor. I would have done the kitchen differently, it doesn't seem to match the rest of the house very well. The master bdrm would have to lose the purpleness, but I like it!

These houses are definitely opulent and mostly not my taste. But I only cringed at a few of the rooms, like the green master bedroom of the Texas house. Clear out the furniture in any of the others and you have pretty grand, beautiful mansions. Slap some paint over that purple one and it looks like has a lot of character. I am unsure why it is called the most hideous list. When looking for a house, we saw much, much worse.
 
2012-12-27 10:46:58 PM  
I was going to make a snarky comment about these people's taste, but then I remembered the fantasy I have of building the beyond the infinite room from 2001.
 
2012-12-27 10:48:09 PM  
here you go Only $1.5 mil and you can hear the neighbor having sex or flushing the john.
Or have crack heads bust the door down.
 
2012-12-27 10:51:54 PM  

Gormenghast: I was going to make a snarky comment about these people's taste, but then I remembered the fantasy I have of building the beyond the infinite room from 2001.


You go total batcave. man.
You get a garage with remote control doors.
You have and underground lair.
It's green. NRG efficient, and you can have sheep or a garlic garden on top. (me, I like both)
Buy a used up gravel pit.
Spring nearby.
Pour concrete for a dome.
Have a running waterfall in it.
It's quiet.
It's secure.
And the JoHos can't find the front door.

Tip the UPS guy well to leave stuff unsigned at the gas station for you.
 
2012-12-27 10:52:10 PM  

CmndrFish: Should I be shamed for actually liking the Olympia, WA one?

Sure, it's disgustingly lavish, but they picked an interesting theme and executed it pretty well.


I live in the area, and based on the address, it's on the tip of a long point, overlooking the islands of south Puget Sound. If nothing else, the view out the windows must be pretty spectacular.
 
2012-12-27 10:57:29 PM  
People who spend millions of dollars to build a "castle" out of normal bricks instead of stone facing are retarded.

/Lives in a castle
/OK maybe in my imagination
 
2012-12-27 11:02:19 PM  
cdn.cstatic.net

The last time I was in a room like this, a row of ladies stood there waiting for me to pick one out.

/Oh yeah. As if YOU wouldn't go to such a place.
 
2012-12-27 11:04:23 PM  

TV's Vinnie: [cdn.cstatic.net image 640x480]

The last time I was in a room like this, a row of ladies stood there waiting for me to pick one out.



Mom?
 
2012-12-27 11:04:32 PM  

Evil Canadian: What I find wild is how cheap real estate is in some locations. Houston for under $500K? In Toronto, you would need to add a hundred K or two to buy a detached house in my old area. It's a decent area, but not horridly expensive for Toronto. Under 1 million for that mess in Indy? Good lord, you couldn't get anything near that size for that price.


Houston and Indianapolis are two of the cheapest large metro areas in the US for housing and general cost of living.

Taking a closer look at the Houston listing, at $499k its way overpriced. It's only 2900+ sq ft, which is pretty average sized for 4 bed places in Tx. While inside the loop, its not the best neighborhood, and it is really dated and will take $50k at least to bring the interior (and the pool area) into the 21st century. Tax assessment is probably way under the asking. Offer $375 and have then talk you up to $400 max.

/Mother is in Houston residential RE
 
2012-12-27 11:23:30 PM  

Rapmaster2000: I can excuse Houston in that it looks like it hasn't been updated since the 1970s - yes, metallic wallpaper was hot in the 70s.  I had a friend whose home was unchanged like that after his mother died.

The rest seem to be people who didn't get that the director's choice of decor in "Scarface" wasn't meant to be complimentary.


I live about ten minutes from the Nassau Bay house. There is another truly hideous house on the same block--but it is ugly outside and inside. You can tell the people built it after watching the reality TV show about the Gottis.....
 
2012-12-27 11:24:43 PM  

buntz: I actually didn't think the Celine Dion one was bad at all! I mean, a little more 'oppulent' than my tastes, but I didn't think it was ugly.


Yeah, I go more for the late fifties-early sixties look myself, but I didn't see what was wrong with that one if you like something more old fashioned. OK, the stone dining room was a little over the top, but other than that.
 
2012-12-27 11:26:57 PM  
Maybe I've been living in cheap digs for too long, but all these homes look nauseating. Could you really prepare a simple grilled sausage for one person in a kitchen that could feed hundreds? And looks like the final scenes in 2001? Ugh.
 
2012-12-27 11:27:47 PM  

Ima4nic8or: Most of them look quite nice. The purple monster is not to my taste but I would probably take it over my own house.


If it were some color other than purple--or at least in addition to purple, you know, different colors for different rooms--I could actually enjoy that sort of tacky. It has its own theater! You could do movie nights!
 
2012-12-27 11:30:39 PM  

Evil Canadian: What I find wild is how cheap real estate is in some locations. Houston for under $500K? In Toronto, you would need to add a hundred K or two to buy a detached house in my old area. It's a decent area, but not horridly expensive for Toronto. Under 1 million for that mess in Indy? Good lord, you couldn't get anything near that size for that price.

That people have horrible taste and stage things terribly is no shock at all - the prices for some IS!

/We sold our 850 sq ft house (3 stories, 2 bedrooms) for 300K over a year ago - and it was a dump. Not even a pretense at decoration.


One thing we have in Texas is room. Our house is a builder house in an average subdivision near Houston, 3100sq ft on 0.22 of an acre (I think). It's only $250k. We have a hunting ranch in the Hill Country, only 215+ acres, $80k. One of the nicer things about the state is the real estate values....
 
2012-12-27 11:34:38 PM  
Most Farkers apparently fail to understand that super rich people can decorate in the newest, ridiculous and quickly fading trends because they can just redecorate or move in 6 months when purple and chrome goes out of style.
 
2012-12-27 11:36:17 PM  

BadReligion: That huge mansion in Houston is only $499,000.00? Seems like a bargain unless there are very serious issues.


(ahem) It's in Houston.
 
2012-12-27 11:40:13 PM  
That one in Miami looked like the shootout scene in Scarface.

www.themost10.com
 
2012-12-27 11:42:34 PM  

Deep Contact: That one in Miami looked like the shootout scene in Scarface.

[www.themost10.com image 850x670]


I think I covered the Dago whore houses sufficiently.
 
2012-12-27 11:49:05 PM  
This is the house I want:

Link

Taxes are only $30,000 a year. Cheap for this area.
 
2012-12-27 11:50:50 PM  

downstairs: simplicimus: I guess if you have to live in Sulphur, may as well go for it. I didn't the respirator rack, must be quite nice.

The whole Lake Charles area of Louisiana is actually really nice.


If you like petrochem plants and busloads of blue-hairs going to L'auberge Du Lac sure. And don't forget the Cajun Cancun of Holly Beach!
 
2012-12-27 11:55:03 PM  
In the LA area, I see a lot of rental listings placed by landlords who probably speak English as a second language and obviously don't have anyone proofread the ads. It's not unusual to see people who boast a "quite neighborhood," "stainless steal appliances," or "specious" apartments or condos. The latter would almost make sense in the case of the linked photos.
 
2012-12-28 12:01:37 AM  

buntz: dumbobruni: seconded, although I can't figure out the exposed bathtub on the stair landing.
You pompous ass! Like you never were walking downstairs and thought to yourself "You know? I don't feel as fresh as I should"
It's people like you.........


Pshh. That's just tacky and show-offy. All my friends get by with just a bidet and a heated towel rack on the landing.
 
2012-12-28 12:10:10 AM  

ProfessorOhki: Pretty sure commercial UAS flight isn't allowed by the FAA so my advice would be to not get caught.


I'm willing to bet it's not actually a "UAV" -- probably a remote-controlled quad-copter with a camera.
 
2012-12-28 12:17:27 AM  

TV's Vinnie: [cdn.cstatic.net image 640x480]

The last time I was in a room like this, a row of ladies stood there waiting for me to pick one out.

/Oh yeah. As if YOU wouldn't go to such a place.


I thought that room looked familiar.

i759.photobucket.com

The billiard room at Graceland.
 
2012-12-28 12:29:35 AM  
All are fairly hideous, and I have almost zero style sense (as far as a straight 35 year old guy goes).

Although to be fair, most just looked like old trendy 70s-80s cheeseball styles that never got updated.

I was actually cool with the castle....if it was like a vacation home or something.
 
2012-12-28 12:32:20 AM  

pciszek: buntz: I actually didn't think the Celine Dion one was bad at all! I mean, a little more 'oppulent' than my tastes, but I didn't think it was ugly.

Yeah, I go more for the late fifties-early sixties look myself, but I didn't see what was wrong with that one if you like something more old fashioned. OK, the stone dining room was a little over the top, but other than that.


Not my style, but actually pretty well done. It at least has an overall feel to it, unlike so many of the others. Most of them a, "this is nice, and this is nice, and this is nice, so if we put all three together in the same room, it'll be three times as nice" feel. Eclecticism is one thing, those are just bad taste enabled by new money.

The one that made me choke was the '"impeccably detailed" architectural marvel in Mukilteo, Wash'. One quick trip through the slideshow and I saw: crooked/wane/warped deck boards; interior beams that were exposed to the rain for so long that they weathered along the bottoms; water stains on the interior window casings; water stains on the T&G ceilings; delaminating siding; bubbles in the paint from water intrusion; and arbor capitals starting to rot. In a house like that, who in his right mind uses 2 1/4 clamshell casings and picture-molds the windows? That's a 1960 tract home detail.

That home is so well detailed that the next owners will probably have to spend tens of thousands of dollars to stop the water from coming in.
 
2012-12-28 12:42:37 AM  
Also, not suprised celine dion's house is as bad as her music. The his and her king size beds in her master bedroom and baday leads me to confirm what ive always suspected....

Ice biatch status: confirmed
 
2012-12-28 12:59:14 AM  

organizmx: This is the house I want:

Link

Taxes are only $30,000 a year. Cheap for this area.


I love Victorian homes. I'm looking at this job in a small town in Michigan. You can get Victorian mansions for 400K

Link
thumbs.trulia-cdn.com
Link
thumbs.trulia-cdn.com
While in my neighborhood in San Diego 400K will get you this...Link
thumbs.trulia-cdn.com
 
2012-12-28 01:02:38 AM  
I saw mostly wide angle shots that make the rooms look much bigger than they actually are.
 
2012-12-28 01:05:49 AM  

Tellingthem: I love Victorian homes. I'm looking at this job in a small town in Michigan. You can get Victorian mansions for 400K


Depends on the cost of living. If the new job qualifies you for a loan in a small town for a house like that more power to ya.

Good luck!
 
2012-12-28 01:07:30 AM  

moonscatter: Swamplot.com does "bad listing photos" almost every day and some of them are pretty hysterical:

[swamplot.com image 400x266]

[swamplot.com image 400x300]

Just as a few examples...



Is... is there a shiny torso hovering over those cribs? Wh-why is there a shiny torso hovering over those cribs? Make it go away.

So very confused...
 
2012-12-28 01:16:52 AM  
The Houston one didn't look hideous, just imitation. And not bad. I wouldn't be ashamed to live there.

Well, in a house LIKE that, in somewhere that isn't Houston.
 
2012-12-28 01:23:31 AM  

saturn badger: Tellingthem: I love Victorian homes. I'm looking at this job in a small town in Michigan. You can get Victorian mansions for 400K

Depends on the cost of living. If the new job qualifies you for a loan in a small town for a house like that more power to ya.

Good luck!


Haha I wish it paid that much. No i just really love old Victorian homes. And am constantly amazed at how much different housing prices are around the country. You really do pay for the weather out here,
 
2012-12-28 01:41:04 AM  

Tellingthem: saturn badger: Tellingthem: I love Victorian homes. I'm looking at this job in a small town in Michigan. You can get Victorian mansions for 400K

Depends on the cost of living. If the new job qualifies you for a loan in a small town for a house like that more power to ya.

Good luck!

Haha I wish it paid that much. No i just really love old Victorian homes. And am constantly amazed at how much different housing prices are around the country. You really do pay for the weather out here,


I am more impressed with the low cost of waterfront in michigan. I mean, I know there is a lot of it, but I have two docks in my backyard (only one boat though :( )
 
2012-12-28 01:44:19 AM  

Tellingthem: I love Victorian homes. I'm looking at this job in a small town in Michigan. You can get Victorian mansions for 400K


Umm. Manistee is on the west side of the state. Two words, man: Lake. Effect.

I've seen amazing homes in SE Michigan that need a lot more work (if finished homes are your thing, good on ya), but also have a lot more land.
 
2012-12-28 01:53:34 AM  
The thing that really gets me in these pictures is the complete abuse of space. In some pictures they've crammed all the shiat they can into a room. In others, they've put little ice-floes of furniture out to fend for itself in the barren wastelands.

I know I don't have a lot of decorating taste, but damn... Also, the unending [insert color/pattern here] with no relief. Yikes.

I'd love to have a lot of the smaller individual pieces of those houses, but the overall package is as garish as promised.
 
2012-12-28 02:00:34 AM  
I've seen some ugly "old money" homes on Palm Beach, but these take the cake.
 
2012-12-28 02:00:44 AM  

Isildur: is there a shiny torso hovering over those cribs? Wh-why is there a shiny torso hovering over those cribs? Make it go away.

So very confused...


It looks like a casting taken of pregnant mommy's front, but instead of painting it a neutral tone it's been given a metallic car paint. Ick.
 
2012-12-28 02:13:12 AM  

Tellingthem: Haha I wish it paid that much. No i just really love old Victorian homes. And am constantly amazed at how much different housing prices are around the country. You really do pay for the weather out here,


I have a friend who lives in a over 100 year old victorian home. Nice place but the upkeep can get be a hit on the pocket book so you have to factor that in. Also things like water. Waiting for hot water for a shower on the upper level adds up when it takes ten minutes for the pipes to heat up enough to make it comfortable.

Repaint if you don't do it yourself? 5k or more.

So there are hidden costs but if you really want one you will get one.

I do love his house. Lots of rooms and high ceilings. Original glass with the bubbles. It is a nice pad.
 
2012-12-28 02:15:34 AM  

saturn badger: Tellingthem: Haha I wish it paid that much. No i just really love old Victorian homes. And am constantly amazed at how much different housing prices are around the country. You really do pay for the weather out here,

I have a friend who lives in a over 100 year old victorian home. Nice place but the upkeep can get be a hit on the pocket book so you have to factor that in. Also things like water. Waiting for hot water for a shower on the upper level adds up when it takes ten minutes for the pipes to heat up enough to make it comfortable.

Repaint if you don't do it yourself? 5k or more.

So there are hidden costs but if you really want one you will get one.

I do love his house. Lots of rooms and high ceilings. Original glass with the bubbles. It is a nice pad.


Sounds nice. Probably still better built than anything from the '70s on.

/glad I purchased a home from the 50s. Solid as a rock, brick, wet plaster.
 
2012-12-28 02:15:42 AM  

ADubs86: Shadyman: The Mukilteo, Wash one (the first set of pics) is kinda cool. I wouldn't pay $1.89M for it, but I'd live in it, sure, and enjoy it, too.

Thought the same thing. Maybe I'm just a sucker for stained glass, because I thought that house didn't deserve to be on the list.


yeah me too, I thought it was great.

I guess it depends how much of an acid head you were ...
 
2012-12-28 02:51:35 AM  

starsrift: The Houston one didn't look hideous, just imitation. And not bad. I wouldn't be ashamed to live there.

Well, in a house LIKE that, in somewhere that isn't Houston.


Agreed.
 
2012-12-28 02:54:40 AM  

Aidan: Tellingthem: I love Victorian homes. I'm looking at this job in a small town in Michigan. You can get Victorian mansions for 400K

Umm. Manistee is on the west side of the state. Two words, man: Lake. Effect.

I've seen amazing homes in SE Michigan that need a lot more work (if finished homes are your thing, good on ya), but also have a lot more land.


Born and raised in a small town by GR so I'm pretty familiar with the weather. Yeah I know there are tons of them in the metro Detroit area. I've just never been a big fan of out there. As I'm getting older the small town country-ish lifestyle is coming back to me.

saturn badger: Tellingthem: Haha I wish it paid that much. No i just really love old Victorian homes. And am constantly amazed at how much different housing prices are around the country. You really do pay for the weather out here,

I have a friend who lives in a over 100 year old victorian home. Nice place but the upkeep can get be a hit on the pocket book so you have to factor that in. Also things like water. Waiting for hot water for a shower on the upper level adds up when it takes ten minutes for the pipes to heat up enough to make it comfortable.

Repaint if you don't do it yourself? 5k or more.

So there are hidden costs but if you really want one you will get one.

I do love his house. Lots of rooms and high ceilings. Original glass with the bubbles. It is a nice pad.


Oh god yeah the heating bills alone can be astronomical. But i do like working on houses. For me updating (furnace, electrical, etc.) and restoring (paint, trim, etc) a home would be ideal. With a more regular sized house and not a mansion it's actually not that expensive. And after seeing what kind of garbage homes they are building out here, i don't think I would want any of the newer houses and the problems would end up being even worse.
 
2012-12-28 03:05:54 AM  
If you want to see the most hilariously kitchy-bordering-on-grotesque thing Celine Dion has ever (to my knowledge) been involved in making (yes, aside from her music) check out this book. (NSFW in a "It's not porn, but you coworkers could still be creeped-out if they glance over your shoulder" way.) A collision of kitsch -- Dion with photographer Anne Geddes -- resulted in some rather "WTF"-worthy images.
 
2012-12-28 03:23:08 AM  

The Musky Scent Of Recent Male Completion: Isildur: is there a shiny torso hovering over those cribs? Wh-why is there a shiny torso hovering over those cribs? Make it go away.

So very confused...

It looks like a casting taken of pregnant mommy's front, but instead of painting it a neutral tone it's been given a metallic car paint. Ick.



Wha? Is this a thing people are doing now? Have some pity; the kids just went through hell to escape from there; no need to remind them on a daily basis.
 
2012-12-28 04:50:05 AM  

saturn badger: Tellingthem: Haha I wish it paid that much. No i just really love old Victorian homes. And am constantly amazed at how much different housing prices are around the country. You really do pay for the weather out here,

I have a friend who lives in a over 100 year old victorian home. Nice place but the upkeep can get be a hit on the pocket book so you have to factor that in. Also things like water. Waiting for hot water for a shower on the upper level adds up when it takes ten minutes for the pipes to heat up enough to make it comfortable.

Repaint if you don't do it yourself? 5k or more.

So there are hidden costs but if you really want one you will get one.

I do love his house. Lots of rooms and high ceilings. Original glass with the bubbles. It is a nice pad.


I live in a queen Ann Victorian built in 1893. It's cold as hell in the winter, but otherwise the charm has been totally worth it.
 
2012-12-28 05:14:56 AM  

TV's Vinnie: [cdn.cstatic.net image 640x480]

The last time I was in a room like this, a row of ladies stood there waiting for me to pick one out.

/Oh yeah. As if YOU wouldn't go to such a place.



It does kind of look like the Pearl, doesn't it...


I actually kind of like most of these houses. It's largely because they read to me as "entertainment spaces" rather than as homes to relax in, and so therefore their ridiculousness is much more easily forgiven.
 
2012-12-28 05:50:48 AM  
It's fun to guess people's religion based on their interior decorating. I'm guessing 1/3 Muslim and 2/3 Jew or maybe just all Baptist.

cdn.cstatic.net

That has to be the owner of the Olympia house and given the 9 foot size and 1.5 foot gilt frame it's a self portrait by the artiste herself or even more hilarious, professionally commissioned. The chaise lounges are even funnier.

If you want to see tasteless decor come down to Newport Beach and walk along the sand after dark and you will see stuff in multimillion dollar beach front homes that makes every house in this article look restrained, tasteful and elegant.
 
2012-12-28 06:30:53 AM  

Tellingthem: organizmx: This is the house I want:

Link

Taxes are only $30,000 a year. Cheap for this area.

I love Victorian homes. I'm looking at this job in a small town in Michigan. You can get Victorian mansions for 400K Link

Link

While in my neighborhood in San Diego 400K will get you this...Link


I would rather live in da UP than CA. Welcome to Michigan, man.
 
2012-12-28 06:41:33 AM  
At least Elvis gave Graceland personality.
 
2012-12-28 06:56:55 AM  
Celine Dion' didn't look that bad. I like the dining room. But what the fark is with rich people and purple?
 
2012-12-28 08:31:35 AM  

abhorrent1: But what the fark is with rich people and purple?


Probably dates back to royals using deep blue and purple dyes for their clothing as a symbol of status.  Or at least that is one possible guess.
 
2012-12-28 08:48:34 AM  

littlett's: abhorrent1: But what the fark is with rich people and purple?

Probably dates back to royals using deep blue and purple dyes for their clothing as a symbol of status.  Or at least that is one possible guess.


Because the only way for Europeans to get purple was to crush tiny periwinkle shells to make the dye.
Time consuming, labor intensive, costly.

Across the ocean, native would mix berries and urine, both readily available.
Europeans, not the most creative bunch.
 
2012-12-28 08:54:37 AM  

littlett's: abhorrent1: But what the fark is with rich people and purple?

Probably dates back to royals using deep blue and purple dyes for their clothing as a symbol of status.  Or at least that is one possible guess.


Its mostly this. Traditionally, purple was a very expensive dye, and in some areas actually restricted to royalty by law. That way people could instantly identify you as being royalty without having to speak to you or come near.

I imagine its just a tradition carry-over. Not to mention purple just plain looks more regal than other colors IMHO.
 
2012-12-28 09:01:53 AM  
why do I have the sudden urge to watch Suspiria?
 
2012-12-28 09:12:16 AM  

LemSkroob: Skirl Hutsenreiter: Anyways, if I photographed the most beautiful valley in the world the way most realtors do houses you'd go "meh, looks okay".

thats because realtors, who stand to make thousands on a sale, would rather use their cell phone than hire a real photographer for a few hundred dollars. But then again, you cant expect much forethought for someone with a GED and a certificate from a weekend-long agent course.


LOL. yea, I wish it was that easy. You should look again into what it takes to get a real estate license.
 
2012-12-28 09:22:41 AM  

Smackledorfer


I recently bought a home. I picked location, price range, rooms and bathrooms etc. Then I made my realtor show me everything in that range.

Who wouldn't still see a home simply because of shiatty, obviously shiatty no less, pics?


Because even craptacular pics can indicate things like layout/locations of rooms and proximity of the house to neighbors, streets, etc. Decor is easy to change but it's a little more difficult to move the house back 40 feet or move a bathroom to another part of the second floor.

It's odd that you wanted to waste your time looking at everything instead of being a little more discerning, but to each his own.
 
2012-12-28 09:29:21 AM  

Ima4nic8or: Most of them look quite nice. The purple monster is not to my taste but I would probably take it over my own house.


I felt bad for thinking this, but thanks for being in the boat. Company is great.
 
2012-12-28 09:45:37 AM  

CmndrFish: Should I be shamed for actually liking the Olympia, WA one?

Sure, it's disgustingly lavish, but they picked an interesting theme and executed it pretty well.


Yeah, I liked that one too. But it would keep a window washer employed year round.

/trickle-down economics
 
2012-12-28 09:52:34 AM  

Alonjar: littlett's: abhorrent1: But what the fark is with rich people and purple?

Probably dates back to royals using deep blue and purple dyes for their clothing as a symbol of status.  Or at least that is one possible guess.

Its mostly this. Traditionally, purple was a very expensive dye, and in some areas actually restricted to royalty by law. That way people could instantly identify you as being royalty without having to speak to you or come near.

I imagine its just a tradition carry-over. Not to mention purple just plain looks more regal than other colors IMHO.


And then came mauve, and other cheap synthetic dyes, and everyone who was anyone had to have purple.
 
2012-12-28 09:58:39 AM  
cdn.cstatic.net

Once you are seated Dovahkhiin, we can begin the negotiations.
 
2012-12-28 10:11:09 AM  

Grand PBUH: [cdn.cstatic.net image 690x453]

Once you are seated Dovahkhiin, we can begin the negotiations.


I giggled. +1
 
2012-12-28 10:15:36 AM  

Alonjar: littlett's: abhorrent1: But what the fark is with rich people and purple?

Probably dates back to royals using deep blue and purple dyes for their clothing as a symbol of status.  Or at least that is one possible guess.

Its mostly this. Traditionally, purple was a very expensive dye, and in some areas actually restricted to royalty by law. That way people could instantly identify you as being royalty without having to speak to you or come near.

I imagine its just a tradition carry-over. Not to mention purple just plain looks more regal than other colors IMHO.


Now that you say that, I seriously just saw an episode of "Mysteries at the Museum" last night about this. And the first gut to mass-produce purple dye without using those shells. I didn't make the connection. I guess it could be a tradition carry-over. I think it's farking ugly, personally.
 
2012-12-28 10:37:58 AM  

Isildur: The Musky Scent Of Recent Male Completion: Isildur: is there a shiny torso hovering over those cribs? Wh-why is there a shiny torso hovering over those cribs? Make it go away.

So very confused...

It looks like a casting taken of pregnant mommy's front, but instead of painting it a neutral tone it's been given a metallic car paint. Ick.


Wha? Is this a thing people are doing now? Have some pity; the kids just went through hell to escape from there; no need to remind them on a daily basis.


I was thinking a tribal fertility carving type thing.
 
2012-12-28 10:40:14 AM  

Englebert Slaptyback: Smackledorfer

I recently bought a home. I picked location, price range, rooms and bathrooms etc. Then I made my realtor show me everything in that range.

Who wouldn't still see a home simply because of shiatty, obviously shiatty no less, pics?


Because even craptacular pics can indicate things like layout/locations of rooms and proximity of the house to neighbors, streets, etc. Decor is easy to change but it's a little more difficult to move the house back 40 feet or move a bathroom to another part of the second floor.

It's odd that you wanted to waste your time looking at everything instead of being a little more discerning, but to each his own.


I know right? I spent 8 more hours looking for a 200,000 dollar purchase that will affect me for decades.

I'm such a moron. I should have just dove in. There was nothing to gain by caution.
 
2012-12-28 11:09:22 AM  
I've been in Thomas Kramer's house a few times (the Miami Beach one). If you look at one little section of your vision, it's pretty cool, but once you realize everywhere you look is so full of everything, it's just hideously over-the-top.

Secret cameras everywhere as the guy is fairly creepy and voyeuristic too. It's been on the market multiple times and he's quite proud that he has kept potential buyer's deposits and thrown lavish parties for himself.
 
2012-12-28 11:11:32 AM  

Smackledorfer: It's odd that you wanted to waste your time looking at everything instead of being a little more discerning, but to each his own.

I know right? I spent 8 more hours looking for a 200,000 dollar purchase that will affect me for decades.

I'm such a moron. I should have just dove in. There was nothing to gain by caution.


It took my wife and I almost two years to find the first home we bought. We looked at more than I can remember. Not sure how being more "discerning" does anything. Looking at it from the outside or in pictures won't show you if the house has a roach infestation, or if the kitchen or bathroom sink has been leaking under the cabinet for 10 years etc. A little paint or a popcorn ceiling can cover a lot of sins in pics.

You can't really tell the layout from pictures. Rooms look bigger in pictures. You can go look at the nicest house in the are. Doesn't mean that once you get inside you won't find bowed walls, stained floors or 20 year old mechanicals.
 
2012-12-28 11:27:56 AM  
Gee! Dem is swell joints!
 
2012-12-28 11:47:50 AM  

Pray 4 Mojo: Most Farkers apparently fail to understand that super rich people can decorate in the newest, ridiculous and quickly fading trends because they can just redecorate or move in 6 months when purple and chrome goes out of style.


The decor in those monstrosities are none of the above.
 
2012-12-28 11:56:53 AM  
Fark Celine Dion and the house she lives in!
 
2012-12-28 12:03:50 PM  

Smackledorfer


I know right? I spent 8 more hours looking for a 200,000 dollar purchase that will affect me for decades.

I'm such a moron. I should have just dove in. There was nothing to gain by caution.


Wow, your reading comprehension is grim.

Here's the very simple version: even bad pics can illustrate deal-breakers*. If you see a deal-breaker in the picture, you won't need to look at the house for realsies. This saves time and allows you to concentrate on houses you might actually want.

* A "deal-breaker" is something you absolutely don't want.

And looking at "everything in [your] price range" took just 8 hours? Bummer. Maybe you'll have more options for the next house.
 
2012-12-28 12:04:25 PM  
One house I was in was done in Fendi Casa *everything*, from furniture to chandeliers, sconces, rugs and bookends. Hideous.
 
2012-12-28 01:02:45 PM  

Englebert Slaptyback: Smackledorfer

I know right? I spent 8 more hours looking for a 200,000 dollar purchase that will affect me for decades.

I'm such a moron. I should have just dove in. There was nothing to gain by caution.


Wow, your reading comprehension is grim.

Here's the very simple version: even bad pics can illustrate deal-breakers*. If you see a deal-breaker in the picture, you won't need to look at the house for realsies. This saves time and allows you to concentrate on houses you might actually want.

* A "deal-breaker" is something you absolutely don't want.

And looking at "everything in [your] price range" took just 8 hours? Bummer. Maybe you'll have more options for the next house.


8 hours of ADDITIONAL investment (you might not want to throw stones about reading comprehension) in house hunting is what I spent, not 8 hours total. "More" being kind of an important word there.

I don't consider it a waste. I ended up buying the second house I looked at (though if I were going by bad pictures I would have skipped it). So how then do I determine what time was wasted? Was all the time after the first 20 minutes of looking at homes a waste because I picked the second one? I don't think so. Was time I spent looking at a home with bad pictures a waste? Obviously not.

Why is the "your" in brackets there, because I didn't want to buy the biggest home I could afford? Because I would rather have a bigger boat than more house. Regardless of my reasoning, nobody should be the object of disdain because they earn less money, and especially not because they don't want a mansion. 2200 square feet is plenty for me, ymmv.

As for what a "deal-breaker" is, I agree on the definition. What I don't agree on is whether anyone can be sure if something is a deal-breaker from pics alone. I didn't even really want to look at the house I ended up buying based on pics. 8 hours isn't a lot of time to spend to ensure that your make the right decision on a purchase as big as owning a home, even if the odds are low that one of the homes you write-off turns out to be a diamond in the rough. But hey, thanks to folks like you maybe I was able to haggle down the price that much more since your kind chose not to even take a look. So there's that.
 
2012-12-28 01:40:39 PM  

Smackledorfer


8 hours of ADDITIONAL investment (you might not want to throw stones about reading comprehension) in house hunting is what I spent, not 8 hours total. "More" being kind of an important word there.


I saw that. What I said (badly) was that you probably spent time looking at houses you might have been able to rule out though other means, e.g. by identifying deal-breakers via pics.


I don't consider it a waste. I ended up buying the second house I looked at (though if I were going by bad pictures I would have skipped it). So how then do I determine what time was wasted? Was all the time after the first 20 minutes of looking at homes a waste because I picked the second one? I don't think so. Was time I spent looking at a home with bad pictures a waste? Obviously not.


A waste would be driving up to a house and realizing immediately that it is not suitable when it could have been eliminated from consideration earlier in the process.


Why is the "your" in brackets there, because I didn't want to buy the biggest home I could afford? Because I would rather have a bigger boat than more house. Regardless of my reasoning, nobody should be the object of disdain because they earn less money, and especially not because they don't want a mansion. 2200 square feet is plenty for me, ymmv.


Calm down, dude. It's nice that you found a starter home. The "your" was in brackets because I was quoting something you had said about "my price range", but replaced "my" with "your" to make it clear whose range it was. Since I modified the quote the brackets were there to indicate the change; this is standard formatting.
 
2012-12-28 02:00:39 PM  
It would have been standard formatting had the rest of the portion in quotes been a direct quote, not to mention had there been any reason to use a quote of me mentioning price range at all.

You turned me spending 8 hours looking at homes with bad pictures (one of which I bought) into sayimg there were only 8 hours worth of homes in my price range. Plus if you were honest in your quoting you would note price alone wasn't my only factor anyways.

Look, at some point of terrible picture (on fire, maybe a wall missing, perhaps a bucket of truth) I wouldn't look at a home. But having purchased three homes now and helped family look for theirs I have never seen anything like that. Pics that were pretty horribly taken to the extent I wouldn't drag the realtor there? Nope.

I am talking about things related to the quality of the photographer here, not a portal to hell in the bedroom closet.
 
2012-12-28 06:39:11 PM  

saturn badger: Tellingthem: Haha I wish it paid that much. No i just really love old Victorian homes. And am constantly amazed at how much different housing prices are around the country. You really do pay for the weather out here,

I have a friend who lives in a over 100 year old victorian home. Nice place but the upkeep can get be a hit on the pocket book so you have to factor that in.

Repaint if you don't do it yourself? 5k or more.

So there are hidden costs but if you really want one you will get one.



$5K to repaint the outside of a victorian???? Remind me not to move there. The last victorian (a cottage) our company painted was over $15K, and that was ~15 years ago.

Also, three little letters to strike fear in the heart of any owner of a home built before 1978: RRP.

That's the EPA's Repair, Renovation, and Painting Rule covering contractors dealing with homes that possibly contain lead-based paint.
 
2012-12-29 02:52:19 AM  

Gough: $5K to repaint the outside of a victorian???? Remind me not to move there. The last victorian (a cottage) our company painted was over $15K, and that was ~15 years ago.


I was far off with my memory. It was actually around $30k. It looks nice and they waited a few months because they are one of the better painters.

/my memory is faulty sometimes
 
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