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(Boston.com)   Happy Festivus to one and all. Air your grievances to the right   (boston.com) divider line 197
    More: Sappy, Festivus, rude behavior, Ig Nobel Prizes, coronary artery disease  
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3988 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Dec 2012 at 8:14 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-23 08:16:09 AM
I GOT A LOT OF PROBLEMS WITH YOU PEOPLE!
 
2012-12-23 08:17:26 AM
I'm better than like 87.54% of you. And the rest just suck.
 
2012-12-23 08:17:37 AM
Hamma mamma....
 
2012-12-23 08:18:24 AM
went to a Festivus party last night. too many friggin kids. always getting in the way of my fun.
george is getting upset!


/george
 
2012-12-23 08:18:27 AM

Close2TheEdge: I GOT A LOT OF PROBLEMS WITH YOU PEOPLE!


Since you're the first to complain, we'll stone you first as well.
 
2012-12-23 08:20:27 AM
If I did that, we'd be here until next Festivus.
 
2012-12-23 08:20:29 AM
My mother just brewed a pot of coffee into the coffee that was left in the pot. This is a new peculiarity to add to the list. It tastes terrible
 
2012-12-23 08:20:46 AM
Frank Costanza: Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. I reached for the last one they had, but so did another man. As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way.
Cosmo Kramer: What happened to the doll?
Frank Costanza: It was destroyed. But out of that a new holiday was born ... a Festivus for the rest of us!
Cosmo Kramer: That must've been some kind of doll.
Frank Costanza: She was.
 
2012-12-23 08:23:17 AM

Hot Carl To Go: My mother just brewed a pot of coffee into the coffee that was left in the pot. This is a new peculiarity to add to the list. It tastes terrible


And I was playing with her dog last night, felt my foot getting warm. The dog filled my right shoe with piss
 
2012-12-23 08:25:18 AM
I hate being 30 and back in college. Nothing reminds you just how much people hate you than know-it-all 18 year olds. Nothing is also quite so humbling as remembering that you were once one of those FREAKS!
 
2012-12-23 08:27:40 AM
www.rollitup.org
 
2012-12-23 08:27:49 AM
Couldn't get a job in my field
Went back to school to learn accounting
All open jobs require years of experience
 
2012-12-23 08:28:50 AM
In honor of Festivus, I will not be eating any bagels today.
 
2012-12-23 08:30:22 AM
Here's the Pole.
img152.imageshack.us
 
2012-12-23 08:32:20 AM

ajgeek: I hate being 30 and back in college. Nothing reminds you just how much people hate you than know-it-all 18 year olds. Nothing is also quite so humbling as remembering that you were once one of those FREAKS!


Agreed, but I would add nothing scares you more than hearing them talk and seeing how warped their view of the world is. Their lack of work ethic worries me, too. I will give them one thing, the excuses that they feel are a legitimate reason to not complete the minimal amount of work they are given are hilarious.
 
2012-12-23 08:33:13 AM
Break ups suck :(

Also, I bought a bottle of pop, which I hardly ever drink, and it was flat when I opened it.

Damn you, life.
 
2012-12-23 08:33:26 AM
So, when do we do the feets of strength?
 
2012-12-23 08:35:03 AM
The skin on the baby back ribs I am making was particularly difficult to remove this morning so I am pissed at that. Otherwise, not much to complain about.
 
2012-12-23 08:35:05 AM
Its just as much trouble for me to raise the toliet seat as
it is for you to lower it!
 
2012-12-23 08:37:03 AM
Piss off, asshole.
 
2012-12-23 08:37:15 AM
I have a problem with people who call soda "pop". It's lame.
 
2012-12-23 08:37:58 AM
That sun's too damn bright this morning. Can somebody turn it down a bit for me?
 
2012-12-23 08:38:39 AM
My butler decided he wanted Christmas Eve AND Christmas Day off. Now I'm going to have a short-handed staff for holiday festivities. I truly know how the Valley Forge soldiers felt suffering through winter.
 
2012-12-23 08:39:14 AM
Is it okay if I call it "fizzy yum-yum juice"?
 
2012-12-23 08:41:07 AM
Today is the 8th day of a 2-week vacation; the first chunk of time greater than 2 days wrapped around a weekend that I've ever taken off. So, naturally, I was woken up at 8:00 by a phone call from the Tampa office that began with "Yeah, I know you're on vacation and all...". This, coincidentally, is the sixth phone call I've gotten from work since starting the vacation.
 
2012-12-23 08:42:53 AM
What do you mean there's no ice? You mean I gotta drink this coffee hot?
 
2012-12-23 08:45:21 AM
I hate how some people here expect each post to be perfect prose written to entertain and enlighten. BUT even the smallest mistake should be pointed out and ridiculed AND the poster demeaned. ostracized and shunned.
 
2012-12-23 08:45:45 AM

Landis: Today is the 8th day of a 2-week vacation; the first chunk of time greater than 2 days wrapped around a weekend that I've ever taken off. So, naturally, I was woken up at 8:00 by a phone call from the Tampa office that began with "Yeah, I know you're on vacation and all...". This, coincidentally, is the sixth phone call I've gotten from work since starting the vacation.


Bill them two hours for each call.
 
2012-12-23 08:46:01 AM
When does the Feats of Strength start?
 
2012-12-23 08:46:02 AM
I'm always taking care of other people and solving their problems. When's my day to kick back and have everyone do things for me?
 
2012-12-23 08:46:08 AM

DubyaHater: I have a problem with people who call soda "pop". It's lame.


I have a problem with people who call pop "soda", they aren't Canadian.
 
2012-12-23 08:48:09 AM

Landis: Today is the 8th day of a 2-week vacation; the first chunk of time greater than 2 days wrapped around a weekend that I've ever taken off. So, naturally, I was woken up at 8:00 by a phone call from the Tampa office that began with "Yeah, I know you're on vacation and all...". This, coincidentally, is the sixth phone call I've gotten from work since starting the vacation.


Ever hear of TURNING OFF YOUR PHONE? Huh? Genius?
 
2012-12-23 08:48:13 AM
Happy Hannahkwanzamas!
 
2012-12-23 08:48:16 AM

AuralArgument: I hate how some people here expect each post to be perfect prose written to entertain and enlighten. BUT even the smallest mistake should be pointed out and ridiculed AND the poster demeaned. ostracized and shunned.


Capitalize that o, douche bag.
 
2012-12-23 08:48:31 AM
i specificly asked for luckycharm acid this morning but i got this scubby doo shiat instead, oh well
 
2012-12-23 08:48:35 AM
I'm an Eagles fan.
 
2012-12-23 08:48:35 AM

DubyaHater: I have a problem with people who call soda "pop". It's lame.


Arm and Hammer makes soda. Coca-Cola makes pop.
 
2012-12-23 08:48:46 AM
nothing like the holiday season where everyone around you wants things done their way, not all can have it their way, no one will budge, and all look to you to make sure it goes the way they want.

and of course through all that, im the only one that doesnt really care how any of it unfolds.
 
2012-12-23 08:49:21 AM
It's nice that I went and bought me an outfit today that costed a lot of money, you know what I mean? 'Cause I figured that Wu-Tang was gonna win. I don't know how you all see it, but when it comes to the children, Wu-Tang is for the children. We teach the children. You know what I mean? Puffy is good, but Wu-Tang is the best, Okay? I want you all to know that this is ODB, and I love you all. Peace!
 
2012-12-23 08:52:49 AM
Married, building a life with someone, spent the year renovating together this old flat we bought in paris. Also managed to fall in love with a co-worker.

Last week I found out that my partner wants to move back to our home country, and that the said co-worker has been banging some other guy from work since summer.

So fark you christmas.
 
2012-12-23 08:55:39 AM
Fark you neighbor who insists on mowing your lawn at 7am with no shirt. You're hairy like a yeti, for god's sake you're scaring the children.

On a serious note, fark you cancer. You took one of my best friends this year. I hope someone finds a way to kick your arse.
 
2012-12-23 08:55:42 AM
Consumers irritate me to no end. Why do you people have to waste money on all that stupid farking garbage you insist that you need? The sale price is wrong? You won't buy it if you don't get the sale price? Then YOU DON'T FARKING NEED IT DO YOU!?!?!

Your $400 meds have a copay of $3? You say you'll die if you don't take the meds but you are making a scene over $3? DON'T TAKE THEM THEN. JUST DIE.
 
2012-12-23 08:55:45 AM
It is now 63°C (154.4°F) cooler in Mikkeli Finland than in Melbourne Australia. That is about 20% of °K difference.
 
2012-12-23 08:55:52 AM

bacchanalias and consequences: I'm an Eagles fan.


Ouch. Sorry.
 
2012-12-23 08:56:25 AM
/works in retail pharmacy
 
2012-12-23 08:58:29 AM
That farker didn't "smart" or "funny" my witty insight. You know who you are. Yes, you.
 
2012-12-23 08:58:49 AM

Maus III: Landis: Today is the 8th day of a 2-week vacation; the first chunk of time greater than 2 days wrapped around a weekend that I've ever taken off. So, naturally, I was woken up at 8:00 by a phone call from the Tampa office that began with "Yeah, I know you're on vacation and all...". This, coincidentally, is the sixth phone call I've gotten from work since starting the vacation.

Ever hear of TURNING OFF YOUR PHONE? Huh? Genius?


Snark appreciated, but not really practical; this is my only phone. So I do that and then friends, family, and people I want to talk to can't get me either. It's a double-edged sword and why I've just started letting everyone who doesn't have a distinctive ring go to voice-mail.

ph0rk>/b>
Bill them two hours for each call.

I wish... I'm salaried, so that would just get pushed to the clients.

\Would much rather my colleagues learn how to farking Google something.
 
2012-12-23 08:58:51 AM
I've had a sinus headache for over a week now and am living on Tylenol. My nose is clogged, my mouth is constantly dry, and I can barely taste anything.
 
2012-12-23 08:59:15 AM
I find tinsel distracting.
 
2012-12-23 08:59:25 AM

Fuggin Bizzy: DubyaHater: I have a problem with people who call soda "pop". It's lame.

Arm and Hammer makes soda. Coca-Cola makes pop.


"Pop"? Farking heathen.

You might as well call all sodas "Coke".
 
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