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(Sun Sentinel)   [ X ] Poke. [ ✔ ] Stab   (sun-sentinel.com) divider line 56
    More: Florida, Facebook, deadly weapon, Broward counties, premeditated murder, Broward Sheriff's Office  
•       •       •

7822 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Dec 2012 at 12:09 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-21 08:26:11 PM
A man is accused of stabbing his girlfriend in the neck because of photographs she posted on Facebook that, he said, ruined his life

Pics of him in a diaper masturbating to a picture of Yoda?
 
2012-12-21 09:49:28 PM

fusillade762: A man is accused of stabbing his girlfriend in the neck because of photographs she posted on Facebook that, he said, ruined his life

Pics of him in a diaper masturbating to a picture of Yoda?


Hardly the strangest thing I've seen on the internet this week.
 
2012-12-21 10:09:01 PM
Pics of him stabbing her?
 
2012-12-21 10:18:20 PM

BarkingUnicorn: Pics of him stabbing her?


or what? it didn't happen. Who can say if any of this shiat actually happened.
 
2012-12-21 11:08:37 PM

BarkingUnicorn: Pics of him stabbing her?


He uploaded them to Instagram so look for them in future online Gerber ads.
 
2012-12-21 11:30:59 PM
Play OJville now! Your friends are all totally not murdering their wives. Click HERE to join the fun.
 
2012-12-22 12:12:13 AM
We play Poke, Stab, Kill in the office....
 
2012-12-22 12:15:31 AM
Is there even a "poke" feature on Facebook anymore? I can't remember the last time I saw someone do it or use it on me.
 
2012-12-22 12:16:58 AM
This is why we need Federal poke officers in every school
 
2012-12-22 12:18:00 AM
Clearly, the solution is to arm every citizen with swords.
 
2012-12-22 12:22:08 AM

fusillade762: A man is accused of stabbing his girlfriend in the neck because of photographs she posted on Facebook that, he said, ruined his life

Pics of him in a diaper masturbating to a picture of Yoda?


I find it a bit hard to believe that a Facebook photo ruined his life more than... ya know, stabbing his girlfriend in the neck.
 
2012-12-22 12:23:25 AM
I bet she'll stop posting stupid stuff on line now.
 
2012-12-22 12:24:56 AM
www.funnychill.com
 
2012-12-22 12:26:11 AM
[ ] Parry
[ ] Thrust
 
2012-12-22 12:31:23 AM
Did she post those pictures of spiders with wings?
 
2012-12-22 12:31:41 AM

fusillade762: A man is accused of stabbing his girlfriend in the neck because of photographs she posted on Facebook that, he said, ruined his life

Pics of him in a diaper masturbating to a picture of Yoda?



Whatever they were, the products of readers' imaginations will be worse.

Release the pics, dude. It's for your own good.
 
2012-12-22 12:34:02 AM
Broward County Judge John "Jay" Hurley ordered him held without bail at the Broward County Jail on Friday, but Bell did not appear in court for medical reasons.

Medical reasons being he got the ever living shiat beat out of him by the cops I assume.
 
2012-12-22 12:34:12 AM

Burr: [ ] Parry
[ ] Thrust


[boiiinngg]

images18.fotki.com
 
2012-12-22 12:38:22 AM
Picture ruined his life, huh? Well, since it doesn't mention her being charged for posting (small) penis pics, the next thing that comes to mind is that it was an ultrasound picture. Or maybe a picture of her kissing his dad/brother/best friend/wife.

Chances are the whole "stabbing her in the neck" thing and the speculation over what the picture was of is going to do more to ruin his life than whatever was in the picture.
 
2012-12-22 12:39:52 AM

Burr: [ ] Parry
[ ] Thrust


[ ] Ho!
[ ] Ha ha!
[ ] Guard!
[ ] Turn!
[ ] Parry!
[ ] Dodge!
[ ] Spin!
[ ] Ha!
[ ] Thrust!

i121.photobucket.com
 
2012-12-22 12:41:18 AM

YonderScott: Broward County Judge John "Jay" Hurley ordered him held without bail at the Broward County Jail on Friday, but Bell did not appear in court for medical reasons.

Medical reasons being he got the ever living shiat beat out of him by the cops I assume.



Was it sooo important that we know that Broward County Judge John Hurley goes by "Jay"?

Or alternately, was it so vital that we know that Broward County Judge Jay Hurley's proper first name is John?
 
2012-12-22 12:44:29 AM

Christian Bale: YonderScott: Broward County Judge John "Jay" Hurley ordered him held without bail at the Broward County Jail on Friday, but Bell did not appear in court for medical reasons.

Medical reasons being he got the ever living shiat beat out of him by the cops I assume.


Was it sooo important that we know that Broward County Judge John Hurley goes by "Jay"?

Or alternately, was it so vital that we know that Broward County Judge Jay Hurley's proper first name is John?


He insists on it ever since people started confusing him with Hurley from Lost.
 
2012-12-22 12:46:35 AM
Right in the middle of the acticle on the stabbing there is an ad:

Buy Cheap Flight TicketsTravel The World For Less. Save $15 Use Promo Code - "NY15". Book Now!

Good idea for anyone considering killing someone to get their tickets out of town now while they're cheap.
 
2012-12-22 12:52:50 AM
Clearly we should ban all knives!!


Ok, ok, I'm kidding.

We should only ban assault knives, ie knives that are longer than two inches. Who needs a knife longer than two inches??

Meat companies should be mandated by law to have no pieces larger than two by four inches.
Steak will also be 'pre-cut'.

/so sorry.
//everyone was doing it!
///slashies with a (very small) knife?
 
2012-12-22 12:55:39 AM
Sounds like he was just standing his ground.
 
2012-12-22 12:59:49 AM

Resident Muslim:
We should only ban assault knives, ie knives that are longer than two inches. Who needs a knife longer than two inches??



Actually, when I moved to California, I had to go shopping for 2-inch knives. Stupid state laws restrict folders longer than 2 inches near schools--i.e., everywhere. So I had to find a smaller pocket knife.

I was annoyed at first, but I must admit that my little 2-incher gets the job done, and it is a lot less hassle to whip out -- and also less likely to intimidate the ladies.

/CSB
/It's not about size, but how you use it
 
2012-12-22 01:00:49 AM
Also - why did TFA have to point out that the knife was black?

Racists.
 
2012-12-22 01:01:49 AM

Rambino: I must admit that my little 2-incher gets the job done, and it is a lot less hassle to whip out -- and also less likely to intimidate the ladies.


I snerked.
 
2012-12-22 01:02:18 AM

Lochsteppe: Christian Bale: YonderScott: Broward County Judge John "Jay" Hurley ordered him held without bail at the Broward County Jail on Friday, but Bell did not appear in court for medical reasons.

Medical reasons being he got the ever living shiat beat out of him by the cops I assume.


Was it sooo important that we know that Broward County Judge John Hurley goes by "Jay"?

Or alternately, was it so vital that we know that Broward County Judge Jay Hurley's proper first name is John?

He insists on it ever since people started confusing him with Hurley from Lost.


Well, he's No J. Peterman!
 
2012-12-22 01:06:41 AM

Resident Muslim: Clearly we should ban all knives!!


Ok, ok, I'm kidding.

We should only ban assault knives, ie knives that are longer than two inches. Who needs a knife longer than two inches??

Meat companies should be mandated by law to have no pieces larger than two by four inches.
Steak will also be 'pre-cut'.

/so sorry.
//everyone was doing it!
///slashies with a (very small) knife?


Firstly, you're a dick for bringing this up in a thread which didn't need it.

Secondly, you're posting in a thread about an attack where, despite his best efforts, a man failed to kill even a single victim with a knife. Had he been armed with a gun, he probably would have had a lot more success.

Now, back to daffy duck references.
 
2012-12-22 01:08:48 AM
Some people take the net entirely too seriously. Ruined his life? Seriously? Facebook must be his life and he must be taking some serious mockery - then was homicidally butthurt as a result of the pics.

We should start requiring licenses to surf the net or use social networking. Mental health assessment for homicidal tendencies will be mandatory.
 
2012-12-22 01:09:14 AM
Obviously these things will happen to you if you live in Florida.

/came for the photos of her fellating a stranger in a bar
/leaving disappointed
 
2012-12-22 01:15:34 AM

Linkster: Lochsteppe: Christian Bale: YonderScott: Broward County Judge John "Jay" Hurley ordered him held without bail at the Broward County Jail on Friday, but Bell did not appear in court for medical reasons.

Medical reasons being he got the ever living shiat beat out of him by the cops I assume.


Was it sooo important that we know that Broward County Judge John Hurley goes by "Jay"?

Or alternately, was it so vital that we know that Broward County Judge Jay Hurley's proper first name is John?

He insists on it ever since people started confusing him with Hurley from Lost.

Well, he's No J. Peterman!


That was pretty much my reaction to the story - is it only Florida that a "judge" would think it important that we knew his nickname?- l assume they either rang him personally or there is an official website with that info on it

seriously, wtf? is this redneck territory or what
 
2012-12-22 01:15:37 AM
img594.imageshack.us

img577.imageshack.us

Sometimes... people just have to learn the hard way.
 
2012-12-22 01:41:48 AM
Well some of those stupid pictures with captions that people are always posting on Facebook make me want to get all stabby.
 
M-G
2012-12-22 02:00:17 AM

Rambino: Also - why did TFA have to point out that the knife was black?


With the victim's first name, the knife wasn't the only thing.
 
2012-12-22 02:19:53 AM
I still don't understand why people use Facebook.
 
2012-12-22 02:37:22 AM
First, I bet it is a fetish revealed or a blackmail followed through on.

Second, I could see how that kind of thing could get me all stabby. It could realistically mean losing your job depending on what you do, loss of friends since the average person is enough of a jerk to throw away a friendship over that, etc. Assuming he wasn't doing so hot before it... Yeah, it would seem like his life was over.

Third, if you can't finish someone off after a stab to the neck, you fail at life. Twist, people, twist. Or stab again. The possibilities are many. This guy would have failed to kill her with a gun too.
 
2012-12-22 03:23:54 AM
considering it took stitches to mend her and not surgery either she was quick on the move or he was hesitant. he who hesitates is lost. loser!
 
2012-12-22 03:51:16 AM
Blah blah blah man stabs girlfriend. Crime, sure, But not news!

Blah blah blah man stabs girlfriend, who happened (like a billion others) to be a Facebook user. BAM! News!

She had a kitchen sink as well. Film at 11.
 
2012-12-22 04:27:48 AM

Juansmith: Blah blah blah man stabs girlfriend. Crime, sure, But not news!

Blah blah blah man stabs girlfriend, who happened (like a billion others) to be a Facebook user. BAM! News!

She had a kitchen sink as well. Film at 11.


I saw on the other network that'n she had a toilet even. N' she wasn't a virgin.
 
2012-12-22 05:08:13 AM

Rambino: Resident Muslim:
We should only ban assault knives, ie knives that are longer than two inches. Who needs a knife longer than two inches??



Actually, when I moved to California, I had to go shopping for 2-inch knives. Stupid state laws restrict folders longer than 2 inches near schools--i.e., everywhere. So I had to find a smaller pocket knife.

I was annoyed at first, but I must admit that my little 2-incher gets the job done, and it is a lot less hassle to whip out -- and also less likely to intimidate the ladies.

/CSB
/It's not about size, but how you use it


Listen, you can try to convince yourself as much as you want, however, one day you are going to whip it out and some guy is going to say "that's not a knife, this is a knife."
Intimidating you and scarring you for life.
 
2012-12-22 05:49:07 AM

apoptotic: Picture ruined his life, huh? Well, since it doesn't mention her being charged for posting (small) penis pics, the next thing that comes to mind is that it was an ultrasound picture. Or maybe a picture of her kissing his dad/brother/best friend/wife.

Chances are the whole "stabbing her in the neck" thing and the speculation over what the picture was of is going to do more to ruin his life than whatever was in the picture.


Or the way some employers react to Facebook pictures, it could have been pictures of him being a drunken mess or something like along those line that got him fired.

Bottom line is, don't ever have a Facebook page.
 
2012-12-22 06:11:06 AM

foo monkey: I still don't understand why people use Facebook.


Isn't it obvious?
spacebison.com
 
2012-12-22 07:06:58 AM

Burr: [ ] Parry
[ ] Thrust


That looks awefully close to a Phantasie reference.

/runs off to find his box of C64 gear.
 
GBB [TotalFark]
2012-12-22 09:38:03 AM

StopLurkListen: Burr: [ ] Parry
[ ] Thrust

[ ] Ho!
[ ] Ha ha!
[ ] Guard!
[ ] Turn!
[ ] Parry!
[ ] Dodge!
[ ] Spin!
[ ] Ha!
[ ] Thrust!

[i121.photobucket.com image 160x120]


Choose your weapon!
[ ] Quarter Staff
[ ] Buck-and-a-quarter Quarter Staff
 
2012-12-22 10:00:10 AM
nobody did this!

[ / ] SLASH
 
2012-12-22 10:08:41 AM
Why are both boxes marked in the headline?
Did he poke her and stab her?
And why did he mark an X for one box and a ✔ for the other?

Why?  WHY?   WHY???
 
2012-12-22 10:12:41 AM

Singleballtheory: Burr: [ ] Parry
[ ] Thrust

That looks awefully close to a Phantasie reference.

/runs off to find his box of C64 gear.


I was reminded of Elvira: Mistress of the Dark, a horrible PC game I remember my stepfather playing.

lh3.ggpht.com
 
2012-12-22 11:21:06 AM
Are there any Farkers besides me who don't do that Faceyspace bullshiat?
 
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