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(Buzzfeed)   Weekly Fark food thread: Christmas Dinners. Share your menus, ask your questions, post photos. Bonus for this week only: A special guest chef who is also a farker   (buzzfeed.com) divider line 336
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1640 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Dec 2012 at 4:58 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-20 06:51:23 PM

twoody: RelaximusPrime: but it seems something in my mix is causing lumps since I stopped using sugar... Any ideas?

A couple of questions, are the lumps basically your dough, just without water, or does it taste bitter?

Are you using the same water you've always used, or did that change too?


Lumps are dough, not bitter and they are only slightly denser than the rest of the frybread. Enough to make a noticable difference, but a difference none-the-less. (I'm strive for the perfect frybread, dammit!)

I use bottled water, since I used to be on RO water and the place we moved to doesn't have that.
 
2012-12-20 06:52:55 PM

Dknsvsbl: twoody: RelaximusPrime: but it seems something in my mix is causing lumps since I stopped using sugar... Any ideas?

A couple of questions, are the lumps basically your dough, just without water, or does it taste bitter?
 
Are you using the same water you've always used, or did that change too?

Mix the honey in with the water.


You may try mixing the dough part way, letting it rest, and then finish the mixing. Also, sift your baking powder with your flour, baking powder is notorious for lumping up.

Last, make sure your water is cold when you add it.
 
2012-12-20 07:09:05 PM
Any suggestions for favorites that are low carb? Sweet or savory are ok. Husband is diabetic.
 
2012-12-20 07:14:56 PM
don't know if tortilla soup recipe is still needed, but this is what I just did:
 
Used ground New Mexico red chile and ground chile pasilla (also red), available in Mexican part of markets or anywhere at all if you're in the Southwest; mixed them together with more pasilla than New Mexican, but it doesn't matter
 
Water, chicken broth, powdered chile (like 3-4 tablespoons of the chile powder) 1 T ground cumin, chicken breasts - however many you think you need to serve the people.  I use my largest soup pot
 
Cook until chicken is tender, remove chicken.
 
Add red enchilada sauce (I used a jarred kind, but canned like Las Palmas will do).  The small can is enough.  Add half the can, taste, add the rest if you like it.  Add garlic, chop some onion and throw in there.  Add black beans and corn (or one or the other, as much as you like).  Simmer for 15 minutes (use the juice from the corn and beans too).
 
Chop up the chicken, put back in pot and simmer.
 
Cut a bunch of tortillas (preferably slightly dry) into strips.  I use a very light coating of olive oil in my darkest frying pan and then spray the top of the tortillas with olive oil, but you can go heavier on the oil if you want.  Throw in part of the tortillas, toast, mix around, put those in pot with soup.  Toast more tortillas, repeat until you have the amount of tortillas you think you like.  Keep tasting the soup.  Add more of the chile powder if you want to.  Or more cumin.  Or more enchilada sauce - make it how you like.
 
For garnish:  Any of the following:
 
diced cilantro
diced avocado
dry oregano
lime juice
diced white onions
AND
of course, more of those tortilla strips
 
Any variation of these ingredients will work, pretty much.  Cooking the chicken breasts in chicken broth and chile makes them much tastier than they would be otherwise.
 
Pav
2012-12-20 07:20:38 PM
I should be eating sweet sweet Chinese food as is proper tradition for me however I married a half goi and my mother in law is Christmas crazy so once again ill be having some Christmasy shiat.
 
2012-12-20 07:38:59 PM

vegasj: Don't know if all know this trick, I submitted this video and the Fark Nazis didn't pick it for the video page.

So I figure why not post in in a food thread!!?


easy way to separate the yolk from egg whites. Never, ever, seen it done this way.


OK. THAT was cool.
 
2012-12-20 07:40:19 PM

mitimoe: Hey fellow Farkers. I am trying to win a contest for my wife. If you have a moment, would you please "like" my picture on the link provided. Must like it on the link and not on this post! (link goes to ATMC which is my local cable company). Thanks and Merry Christmas!

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10151184106732828&set=o.89496 7 89220&type=1&theater

Wife is good people. Me..eh..but Wife is awesome..


No one wants spam for christmas dinner
 
2012-12-20 07:45:10 PM
Homemade Italian sausage and peppers on homemade bread with a nice Cabernet.

/Also, meatballs in my best Dago Red spaghetti sauce.
//And a nice salad
///Followed by espresso and ricotta pie
 
2012-12-20 07:45:55 PM

kwame: I hate when people try to tell me that Christmas is for ham and Thanksgiving is for turkey.

Name one f*cking Christmas song that mentions ham.  See.



Kwame, Here's one.

Link
 
2012-12-20 07:53:07 PM

twoody: 1 - DO NOT MESS WITH FAMILY HOLIDAY FOOD TRADITIONS. This is not the time to break out the dish you saw in Saveur... people will only complain that it's not the same way that Aunt Beth made it.

 
Oh jeez. Just earlier today I made our traditional Christmas Eve cavatelli (machine shaped gnocchi) with my mom for the first time. I've always resisted learning the recipe because my sisters know how to do it and whatever, but.  All I can say is no wonder her pasta is my least favorite in the world.
 
But the recipe is written in my grandma's handwriting so I just smiled and went along with it.
 
2012-12-20 09:00:58 PM
I am sooooooooooo hungry now!!!
 
2012-12-20 09:03:53 PM
We're doing bone-in prime rib smoked in the Big Green Egg. It's tradition.

Other than that, I'm not 100% sure what's on the menu. Mom and I are going shopping tomorrow. I know we've been discussing the following, which may or may not make it into the menu:

Popovers
Yorkshire Pudding
Garlic Mashed Potatoes
French cut sauteed green beans w/slivered almonds
Wilted spinach
Not sure what dessert will be.................hmm

And for Christmas morning we are nixing the tradition of Great Grandmother's Coffee Cake....may that evil side of the family finally rest in hell. And we're going to try a new tradition. I'm thinking quickie sticky buns using a bundt pan and Grands biscuits.

Christmas is fun again now that I have a son. You don't realize how effing boring Christmas is when there are no more kids. We're sleeping over in our pajamas and waking up early on Christmas Day. Of course, he's only 6 months old so he doesn't get it yet, but we'll enjoy the hell out of it. :)

Can't wait for some liquoured up coffee :)
 
2012-12-20 09:20:03 PM

Shostie: I swear to f*cking God I'm the only person in the world who has seen this movie...


I will be watching this! Cheers!
 
2012-12-20 09:24:56 PM

geekyspice: Christmas is fun again now that I have a son. You don't realize how effing boring Christmas is when there are no more kids. We're sleeping over in our pajamas and waking up early on Christmas Day. Of course, he's only 6 months old so he doesn't get it yet, but we'll enjoy the hell out of it. :)


18, 13 and 3 here. The 3 year old makes all the difference!!
 
2012-12-20 09:37:09 PM

Anderson's Pooper: geekyspice: Christmas is fun again now that I have a son. You don't realize how effing boring Christmas is when there are no more kids. We're sleeping over in our pajamas and waking up early on Christmas Day. Of course, he's only 6 months old so he doesn't get it yet, but we'll enjoy the hell out of it. :)

18, 13 and 3 here. The 3 year old makes all the difference!!


my two are 33 and 27.... it's still fun because the wife still buys them cheap novelty toys along with a few other things and they have come to expect it.
 
2012-12-20 09:54:08 PM
Mother is a great cook.
Apps; marinated shrimp, seafood ceviche, and grilled duck breast wrapped in bacon around cream cheese and jalapeno.
Main; prime rib that overwhelms your plate with au' jus sauce with potatoes pierre, plenty of veggies, rolls, and filet mignon for the kids.
/dessert; I'm too full, but cheesecake and strawberries dipped in sour cream and brown sugar.
//2 bottles of champagne for 4 people plus wine and scotch
///no need to try and drink more after it's over.
 
2012-12-20 10:34:11 PM
I will be making:
Prime Rib Roast
Garlic Mashed Potatoes
Brown Sugar & Bourbon Glazed Carrots
Asparagus or Green Beans
Yorkshire Pudding
Pecan Pie
Pumpkin Pie and whatever other various things get baked.
 
2012-12-20 10:48:56 PM
Sex on a cracker
 
2012-12-21 12:07:33 AM
Christmas in our home used to be about prime rib & foie gras before the PETA terrorists obliterated the much needed jobs in the entire California foie gras industry. This year we'll have to settle for prime rib alone, until our leaders can get the balls to put all PETA members behind bars where they belong.
 
2012-12-21 12:28:10 AM

fat aristotle: atlfarkette: All I know so far is that we are having prime rib.

Good choice. That's what poppa Aristotle is cocking as well.


Are you sure you want to eat that after he's finished?
 
2012-12-21 01:27:13 AM

kwame: I hate when people try to tell me that Christmas is for ham and Thanksgiving is for turkey.


I make Rabbit Stew for Easter...

Typically, we do Ham or a Roast for Christmas dinner, but this year, my sister and brother-in-law are taking us out to dinner on the Eve. They won't tell us where, so it's an unknown.
 
2012-12-21 08:55:38 AM
I just plan to eat at the Y as much as possible over the Christmas break.
 
2012-12-21 09:06:43 AM
Any suggestions for the following situation?

I want to do a baked rice pudding for dessert. However, the in-laws have the day planned as follows: Dinner at 5:30, church at 7:30, dessert after church (around 9). I'm not sure why they don't just do a Christmas lunch, because their schedule is a huge pain in the ass. Nobody likes rushing out directly after an orgy of cooking/eating, you guys!

I have considered the crock pot, but when I do this pudding in the oven, it comes out nice and firm (like a baked mac & cheese rather than a slumpy stove top rice pudding) so I'm not sure about the conversion. I've never done it in the crock pot before, and don't currently own one, so I can't test it out. Would the crock pot be ok? Would I be better off baking it in the morning, putting it in the fridge and reheating? How long would it take to reheat in the oven? Should I just have everyone nuke their individual bowls?

We're only serving 4, so the pudding isn't too large, and I don't think I can get away with not going to church so I can tend the pudding.
 
2012-12-21 11:02:44 AM
Dear Twoody,

http://www.npr.org/2012/11/13/165057852/giving-thanks-for-can-free-co o king?guid=1353345368347

I'm looking into making the can-less green-bean casserole here, but I'm gluten-free. What can I use instead of flour? Arrowroot?

Also, I'm thinking of using portobello mushrooms for that recipe, would it be too strong?

/Will follow on youtube, linkies?
 
2012-12-21 11:18:08 AM

shortymac: I'm looking into making the can-less green-bean casserole here, but I'm gluten-free. What can I use instead of flour? Arrowroot?

Also, I'm thinking of using portobello mushrooms for that recipe, would it be too strong?



I'm not twoody, but here's my take on your questions:

1) There's lots of thickening agents that are gluten-free: corn starch, guar gum, kudzu powder come to mind. I'm inclined to recommend the kudzu for the casserole: by the time corn starch gets thick enough, it tends to get gummy. Arrowroot doesn't have much "punch" in my experience.

2) You can never get too much umami. Portobellos will be fine. Preferable, in my book. Just be sure to de-gill them and cut them into small enough pieces so as not to be physically intrusive. It's a *green bean* casserole, after all. Don't skimp on the fried onions!

Sounds yummy. I might just make it myself! (Plans are still in flux at the Nuisance household, lots of travelers with divergent schedules)
 
2012-12-21 11:31:41 AM

shakenasababy: Hello twoody!

I have a question. I bought a deep frier for Friendsgiving and served up some great fried turkey. I thought I'd treat my parents this Christmas to a fried turkey, but maybe you have other suggestions for what I can deep fry?


My Father in Law always does Chicken Wings, Potato Wedges, Onion Rings, Mozz Sticks for apps.
 
2012-12-21 11:45:27 AM

shortymac: What can I use instead of flour? Arrowroot?


It looks like the flour is used for two things:  thickening the sauce (1/4 cup) and coating the onions to make em crispy when they get fried ( 1 1/4 cups).

If this is the case, I'd use corn starch as it's an easier conversion, and your onions will be far crisper than with other starches.

For thickening, 3/4ths a cup of cornstarch = 1 cup of flour.  Meaning you'll only need 6 TBS of corn starch.  To be safe, I'd mix the cornstarch with the chicken stock before you add the stock to the heat.  Mixing corn starch with butter can be tricky.

For the crispy onions, I'd reduce the corn starch to 1 cup and cook as directed.

All the best!
 
2012-12-21 11:51:13 AM

precia: Any suggestions for the following situation?

I want to do a baked rice pudding for dessert. However, the in-laws have the day planned as follows: Dinner at 5:30, church at 7:30, dessert after church (around 9). I'm not sure why they don't just do a Christmas lunch, because their schedule is a huge pain in the ass. Nobody likes rushing out directly after an orgy of cooking/eating, you guys!

I have considered the crock pot, but when I do this pudding in the oven, it comes out nice and firm (like a baked mac & cheese rather than a slumpy stove top rice pudding) so I'm not sure about the conversion. I've never done it in the crock pot before, and don't currently own one, so I can't test it out. Would the crock pot be ok? Would I be better off baking it in the morning, putting it in the fridge and reheating? How long would it take to reheat in the oven? Should I just have everyone nuke their individual bowls?

We're only serving 4, so the pudding isn't too large, and I don't think I can get away with not going to church so I can tend the pudding.


You have to be careful with a slow cooker, as it doesn't have an upper end electrical limiter, other than a thermo-coupler designed to prevent your slow cooker from meltdown.  In the case of rice pudding as long as you keep the pudding well hydrated you should be OK, but your risk is drying out the pudding if you're not watching it.

Another consideration is the browning/firmness your rice pudding will get in the oven.  Typically, the top of the rice pudding loses its moisture and becomes pretty firm.  In a slow cooker, the heat will never likely exceed the boiling point of your altitude, meaning no browning/firmness, and ultimately the goopy stovetop experience you're trying to avoid.

If I was doing it, I'd set my oven on a timer to be done about the time I got home from my events.  Food safety rules will allow the ingredients to rest in a room temperature oven for 3-4 hours before you would need to be concerned.  -assuming you cook the rice pudding to an internal temp of 165.
 
2012-12-21 11:52:02 AM
OK, I think I've answered all your questions.  If I've missed any I apologize, please repost the question and I'll do my best to get you a good answer.
 
2012-12-21 11:52:48 AM

Random Anonymous Blackmail: [investorplace.com image 400x291]

You are jealous, aren't you?

/neither am I


So you like tripe, heart, and stomach treated with chemicals?
 
2012-12-21 12:08:52 PM

twoody: shortymac: What can I use instead of flour? Arrowroot?

It looks like the flour is used for two things:  thickening the sauce (1/4 cup) and coating the onions to make em crispy when they get fried ( 1 1/4 cups).

If this is the case, I'd use corn starch as it's an easier conversion, and your onions will be far crisper than with other starches.

For thickening, 3/4ths a cup of cornstarch = 1 cup of flour.  Meaning you'll only need 6 TBS of corn starch.  To be safe, I'd mix the cornstarch with the chicken stock before you add the stock to the heat.  Mixing corn starch with butter can be tricky.

For the crispy onions, I'd reduce the corn starch to 1 cup and cook as directed.

All the best!


Thank you so much! :) I LOVE green bean casserole and I'm so happy to be able to make it! :)
 
2012-12-21 12:39:00 PM

twoody: You have to be careful with a slow cooker, as it doesn't have an upper end electrical limiter, other than a thermo-coupler designed to prevent your slow cooker from meltdown. In the case of rice pudding as long as you keep the pudding well hydrated you should be OK, but your risk is drying out the pudding if you're not watching it.

Another consideration is the browning/firmness your rice pudding will get in the oven. Typically, the top of the rice pudding loses its moisture and becomes pretty firm. In a slow cooker, the heat will never likely exceed the boiling point of your altitude, meaning no browning/firmness, and ultimately the goopy stovetop experience you're trying to avoid.

If I was doing it, I'd set my oven on a timer to be done about the time I got home from my events. Food safety rules will allow the ingredients to rest in a room temperature oven for 3-4 hours before you would need to be concerned. -assuming you cook the rice pudding to an internal temp of 165.


Thank you for the reply. My nervousness regarding using the slow cooker was basically for the reasons you've just stated. (Runny rice pudding is gross!) I don't know if the oven I'll be using has a timer, or if they'd even be ok with leaving it running while we're away. I guess my best option is to cook in the morning and reheat, as I doubt I'll be able to weasel out of church. I'd rather have to reheat (inelegant as that may be) than risk screwing up the dessert entirely.
 
2012-12-21 07:06:12 PM
Every year I make Prime Rib and then add a British theme to dinner with the addition of Yorkshire Pudding. I also make some roasted mushrooms, crispy potatoes, something green like green beans with bacon, and some gravy. This year we are adding a Blue Cheese Butter to go with the Prime Rib and I am actually thinking about adding some Horseradish to the butter.
So I guess my question to Chef Tom is can I add it to compound butter with out it being to strong or do I need to do something to it before I use it??? It is definitely an ingredient that I have not used at all. We buy this mayo that has it in it for Roast Beef Sandwiches but that is about as far as my exposure to it goes.

Also can I use it for other things besides Roast Beef???
 
2012-12-21 08:36:42 PM

casual disregard: twoody: casual disregard: Any ideas?

What foods do you like to eat?

Poultry, pasta, rice. Also very spicy. Probably nothing good, and I guess that is the challenge. I'm trying to radically change my habits for the better.


Have you given tofu a chance? It's like a flavor sponge when it comes to spicy, and it can be combined with rice and other veggies very easily. I know not everyone is a fan, but with a decent marinade and a garlic and chili paste out can be really good if you can sear a crust onto it.
 
2012-12-22 12:05:44 PM
Twoody, Why do I have to preheat my oven? Couldn't I adjust the appropriate cooking time, taking into consideration the time it takes to go from 0-450 degrees (in a logarithmic fashion of course)?

This is all I ask.

Thank you
 
2012-12-22 06:02:27 PM

Shostie: Hi, twoody,

I was just wondering how long it would take to cook a person, like, say, kwame.

You see, it's all part of this elaborate revenge fantasy. I plan to present the cooked kwame to my husband and say, "try the cock, Albert. It's a delicacy, and you know where it's been," as a sort of epic denouement and an homage to a cult movie that no one's seen but me.

Thanks,

Shostie


The Cook, The Thief, His Wife, and Her Lover.

Awesome movie.

=]
 
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