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(WXYZ Detroit)   Schools cancel classes for rest of week due to 'Mayan calendar predictions'   (wxyz.com) divider line 74
    More: Amusing, predictions, rumors  
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5798 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Dec 2012 at 1:13 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-20 10:22:30 AM
Getting the day off for an apocalypse is great at the time, but you always end up having to make those days up post-apocalypse, and going to school in a blasted hellscape where the living envy the dead is even less fun than usual.
 
2012-12-20 10:23:38 AM
This cannot possibly be f*cking serious.
 
2012-12-20 10:45:52 AM
There's a rumor going around in my town that a high school student was expelled for threatening violence tomorrow.
 
2012-12-20 10:47:05 AM
This is why we can't have nice things.
The media builds these things up.
Then lunatics decide that they need to act by either being a prepper, hoard guns and possibly act on some delusion.
 
2012-12-20 11:00:37 AM

Sybarite: Getting the day off for an apocalypse is great at the time, but you always end up having to make those days up post-apocalypse, and going to school in a blasted hellscape where the living envy the dead is even less fun than usual.


I want you to know I voted your post MOAST FUNNY.
 
2012-12-20 11:25:56 AM

Sybarite: Getting the day off for an apocalypse is great at the time, but you always end up having to make those days up post-apocalypse, and going to school in a blasted hellscape where the living envy the dead is even less fun than usual.


Perhaps, but at least the busses should be a bit less crowded.
 
2012-12-20 12:38:09 PM
o_O
 
Everyone responsible for that decision should be thrown into an active volcano.
 
2012-12-20 12:55:30 PM
Sounds like a Vice-Principal wants to get as much sex with students in as possible without classes mucking things up.
 
GBB
2012-12-20 01:15:12 PM
"the rest of the week"?? you mean Friday?
 
2012-12-20 01:17:41 PM
The decision to cancel classes is not an easy one. After the recent events in Connecticut, there have been numerous rumors circulating in neighboring districts about potential threats of violence against students.

Additional rumors about the Mayan calendar predictions and related violence have caused significant disruptions in several Lapeer County Schools. These rumors have been thoroughly investigated and determined to be false. We are pleased to report that at Chatfield there have been absolutely no threats of violence and students, staff and parents have acted admirably. In fact, we anticipate that many of our students and staff will be disappointed that school has been closed.


Only a school district could make a statement so clearly pants-on-head-retarded and deliver it deadpan.
 
2012-12-20 01:18:42 PM
It sounds like it's being done because they fear some nut will use the 21st as an excuse to commit violence. Still silly, but not as much as the headline suggests.
 
2012-12-20 01:19:41 PM
Yeah, this is happening all over the country. More proof that America is moving closer to the movie "Idiocracy"
 
Some schools have been closed here in Virginia for the "end of the world" and one school system's superintendent sent out a letter to all parents. Here are the "highlights" aka face palms.
 
 
Dear Parents.
As you may be aware, there are several rumors regarding threats of violence and end of the world on December 21, 2012.

 
In our communication with law enforcement, we are aware that these rumors are nationwide and are unfounded.
 
 To further ease concerns, Friday we will have additional law enforcement to support our schools.
 
Yes, because when the end of the world comes and the ground opens up to swallow us all, the extra cops can shoot the ground or at least taze it and that will make it close back up.
 
/not enough face palms
 
2012-12-20 01:20:45 PM
Meh. If there's been threats in the district it kind of makes sense.
 
2012-12-20 01:20:49 PM
RTFA .. they didn't say they were closing the schools due to the Mayan apocalypse, just due to the high probability that some nutbar would use it as an excuse to cause shiat...

to me that sounds pretty rational..but i am canadian, so wtf do i know, eh?.
 
2012-12-20 01:21:04 PM
*Ahem*

Aren't all the little ones out of school already for a different cult's superstitions?
 
2012-12-20 01:21:10 PM
Heard about this from a friend in Grand Blanc. Stupid, stupid kids.
 
2012-12-20 01:22:29 PM

AJisaff: RTFA .. they didn't say they were closing the schools due to the Mayan apocalypse, just due to the high probability that some nutbar would use it as an excuse to cause shiat...

to me that sounds pretty rational..but i am canadian, so wtf do i know, eh?.


Actually they say in the statement that there is no evidence of any threats against the schools actually being closed, but they're closing them anyhow. Therein lies the foolishness of it all.
 
2012-12-20 01:23:09 PM
I want to know what time doomsday is, I know its tomorrow but when exactly does it start? Is it like new years and it travels around the globe or what? Do we get to watch Asia, the middle east and africa be reduced to a sea of lava and then it goes from New york to LA? I need to know if I should set my alarm or anything and also what to wear.
 
2012-12-20 01:24:26 PM
Just so I know when to panic, is the world supposed to end ON the 21st or is the 21st the last day
before the end of the world?
 
2012-12-20 01:24:33 PM

deanayer: I want to know what time doomsday is, I know its tomorrow but when exactly does it start? Is it like new years and it travels around the globe or what? Do we get to watch Asia, the middle east and africa be reduced to a sea of lava and then it goes from New york to LA? I need to know if I should set my alarm or anything and also what to wear.


It's already doomsday in Australia. Did they all die? Is there an Australian in the house? Are the Kangaroos OK?
 
2012-12-20 01:24:59 PM
True believers tend to go apeshiat whenever their particular choice in apocalypse is about to occur and then fails to occur.
 
2012-12-20 01:26:38 PM
Wow, many Farkers and commenters on that page are stupider than I thought.
The only thing dumber than believing the "Mayan apocalypse" is thinking other people believe it.
 
2012-12-20 01:26:45 PM
What is the appropriate drink for an end of the world party?
 
2012-12-20 01:27:56 PM

Walker: Yeah, this is happening all over the country. More proof that America is moving closer to the movie "Idiocracy"

Some schools have been closed here in Virginia for the "end of the world" and one school system's superintendent sent out a letter to all parents. Here are the "highlights" aka face palms.


Dear Parents.
As you may be aware, there are several rumors regarding threats of violence and end of the world on December 21, 2012.

In our communication with law enforcement, we are aware that these rumors are nationwide and are unfounded.

 To further ease concerns, Friday we will have additional law enforcement to support our schools.

Yes, because when the end of the world comes and the ground opens up to swallow us all, the extra cops can shoot the ground or at least taze it and that will make it close back up.

/not enough face palms


Reading comprehension - not your strong suit.
THEY AREN'T BRINGING IN EXTRA COPS BECAUSE THEY THINK THE END OF THE WORLD IS HAPPENING.
Dumbass.
 
2012-12-20 01:28:11 PM
We are a nation of sandy vaginas.
 
2012-12-20 01:29:08 PM

AJisaff: RTFA .. they didn't say they were closing the schools due to the Mayan apocalypse, just due to the high probability that some nutbar would use it as an excuse to cause shiat...

to me that sounds pretty rational..but i am canadian, so wtf do i know, eh?.


This.
 
/not Canadian.
 
2012-12-20 01:30:27 PM

PowerSlacker: We are a nation of sandy vaginas.


t1.gstatic.com
 
2012-12-20 01:30:36 PM

Begoggle: Wow, many Farkers and commenters on that page are stupider than I thought.
The only thing dumber than believing the "Mayan apocalypse" is thinking other people believe it.


You underestimate the stupidity of the American people. One third of Americans believe UFOs are real. 48% of Americans believe in ghosts. 51% of Americans voted for George Bush in 2004.
 
2012-12-20 01:31:48 PM

Begoggle: Walker: Yeah, this is happening all over the country. More proof that America is moving closer to the movie "Idiocracy"

Some schools have been closed here in Virginia for the "end of the world" and one school system's superintendent sent out a letter to all parents. Here are the "highlights" aka face palms.


Dear Parents.
As you may be aware, there are several rumors regarding threats of violence and end of the world on December 21, 2012.

In our communication with law enforcement, we are aware that these rumors are nationwide and are unfounded.

 To further ease concerns, Friday we will have additional law enforcement to support our schools.

Yes, because when the end of the world comes and the ground opens up to swallow us all, the extra cops can shoot the ground or at least taze it and that will make it close back up.

/not enough face palms

Reading comprehension - not your strong suit.
THEY AREN'T BRINGING IN EXTRA COPS BECAUSE THEY THINK THE END OF THE WORLD IS HAPPENING.
Dumbass.


It was a joke dumbass. Your reading comprehension criticism is ironic, don't ya think?
 
2012-12-20 01:31:48 PM
lh5.googleusercontent.com
 
2012-12-20 01:32:00 PM
Hey Michigan school admins, do you know the word "gullible" isn't in the dictionary?
 
2012-12-20 01:32:49 PM
I happen to live in Genesee county. That was a 'played down' letter. What actually happened is that yesterday some kids decided to call in a bomb threat to one of our schools. They locked down that school and heard about some additional threats. Given recent events, they simply decided to start Christmas vacation early rather than take the chance that any of the rumors/threats turned out to be real.

And yeah... my daughter isn't in school today as a result.
 
2012-12-20 01:33:49 PM
Wait, when did schools stop getting Christmas Vacation? Sorry...Holiday Break. [old_man_voice]When I was a kid, we had two weeks off at the end of the year.[/old_man_voice] Applied to this year's calendar, the last day of school for the year would have been 12/14/12 and we would have resumed classes on 1/2/13. Has that changed?
 
2012-12-20 01:33:56 PM

Walker: Begoggle: Walker: Yeah, this is happening all over the country. More proof that America is moving closer to the movie "Idiocracy"

Some schools have been closed here in Virginia for the "end of the world" and one school system's superintendent sent out a letter to all parents. Here are the "highlights" aka face palms.


Dear Parents.
As you may be aware, there are several rumors regarding threats of violence and end of the world on December 21, 2012.

In our communication with law enforcement, we are aware that these rumors are nationwide and are unfounded.

 To further ease concerns, Friday we will have additional law enforcement to support our schools.

Yes, because when the end of the world comes and the ground opens up to swallow us all, the extra cops can shoot the ground or at least taze it and that will make it close back up.

/not enough face palms

Reading comprehension - not your strong suit.
THEY AREN'T BRINGING IN EXTRA COPS BECAUSE THEY THINK THE END OF THE WORLD IS HAPPENING.
Dumbass.

It was a joke dumbass. Your reading comprehension criticism is ironic, don't ya think?


Epic fail.
 
2012-12-20 01:35:28 PM

jtown: Wait, when did schools stop getting Christmas Vacation? Sorry...Holiday Break. [old_man_voice]When I was a kid, we had two weeks off at the end of the year.[/old_man_voice] Applied to this year's calendar, the last day of school for the year would have been 12/14/12 and we would have resumed classes on 1/2/13. Has that changed?


We still have the vacation, they're just a bit shorter than you got as a kid.
 
2012-12-20 01:36:09 PM

sigdiamond2000: This cannot possibly be f*cking serious.


It is. My son is in one of the districts.

I almost broke my nose faceplaming at the email last night.
 
2012-12-20 01:36:29 PM

Begoggle: Wow, many Farkers and commenters on that page are stupider than I thought.
The only thing dumber than believing the "Mayan apocalypse" is thinking other people believe it.



aparently 10% of the population of the world does....
just sayin..

http://thecostaricanews.com/the-2012-mayan-prophecy-renewal-or-apocal y pse/14263
 
2012-12-20 01:36:32 PM
Yes, it's true. I live among idiots.
 
2012-12-20 01:37:56 PM
My daughter was actually pissed that they did this because she was looking forward to her class holiday party that they were going to have on Friday.

Me, I'd like to publicly humiliate the kids who called in the bomb threat to get out of an exam...
 
2012-12-20 01:38:56 PM
Does anybody know what time the apocalypse is scheduled to start tomorrow? Do I need to set my alarm and go to work, or can I just stay up all night drinking?
 
2012-12-20 01:39:01 PM

deanayer: I want to know what time doomsday is, I know its tomorrow but when exactly does it start? Is it like new years and it travels around the globe or what? Do we get to watch Asia, the middle east and africa be reduced to a sea of lava and then it goes from New york to LA? I need to know if I should set my alarm or anything and also what to wear.


The Mayan calendar rolls over at dawn on the 21st. I am assuming that is Yucatan time which is the same as U.S. Central time. Sunrise tomorrow in Cancun is at 6:20 AM so you really should be having your end of the world party tonight.
 
2012-12-20 01:41:38 PM
Everyone involved in making this decision should be fired. Immediately.
 
2012-12-20 01:43:39 PM
imageshack.us

Meh...

In town, it's well known that when the faculty gets home at night their fat and psychopathic spouses thrash them within inches of their lives.
 
2012-12-20 01:45:36 PM
As someone who is from that neck of the woods (Michigan's Thumb), I am amused and oddly not surprised.
 
2012-12-20 01:47:04 PM
All I ever do with these articles is hunt down the origin and make a mental note of how goddamn crazy and ignorant people are there.
 
2012-12-20 01:48:13 PM

MSkow: Everyone involved in making this decision should be fired. Immediately.


Why?
I can't wait for your well-reasoned answer.
 
2012-12-20 01:49:21 PM
laughingsquid.com
 
2012-12-20 01:49:40 PM
THERE WAS A BOMB THREAT

apparently some of you haven't heard that part...
 
2012-12-20 01:50:59 PM
An article on MSNBC said it was because of threats AND doomsday, but I don't think they posted a letter...
 
2012-12-20 01:54:46 PM

GBB: "the rest of the week"?? you mean Friday?


News article posted 10:30pm last night sparky. School administrators do not post their memos directly to fark.
 
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