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(InfoWorld)   Forget the Mayan Apocalypse. By 2014, the Internet will be the death of us all   (infoworld.com) divider line 48
    More: Scary, online  
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7387 clicks; posted to Geek » on 18 Dec 2012 at 5:42 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-18 03:34:50 PM
Don't use internet enabled insulin pumps.
 
2012-12-18 03:51:02 PM
I've got my money on robopocalypse in 10 years.
 
2012-12-18 04:21:56 PM
Be afraid... be very afraid
 
2012-12-18 04:40:41 PM

UberDave: I've got my money on robopocalypse in 10 years.


I think it will be rogue genes of some sort. Although if it's the Internet I suppose rogue memes will do.

HA HA Guy will be the death of us all!
 
2012-12-18 05:39:17 PM
I just want the technological singularity to happen faster.
 
2012-12-18 05:41:33 PM
" Examples include a pacemaker that can be tuned remotely,"

What does that mean? Tuned to a hip hop station or something? Argh, what's that sound? *thud*
 
2012-12-18 05:47:19 PM
My money's on death by teledildonics
 
2012-12-18 05:48:52 PM
Psh, Hollywood already warned us of this 17 years ago.
 
2012-12-18 05:52:44 PM
Good luck. My pacemaker is behind 7 proxies.
 
2012-12-18 06:04:56 PM
Forced to sport wood by a remote source.
 
2012-12-18 06:06:05 PM
As long as Mark Zuckerman dies I'm okay with this.
 
2012-12-18 06:10:17 PM
blondesearch.ru

DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL! DESTROY US ALL!!
 
2012-12-18 06:12:56 PM
will this coincide with the usb fleshlights and female hand grips?
 
2012-12-18 06:14:42 PM
I didn't read TFA because the site won't display correctly on my phone, but I'm guessing that someone has been watching Homeland lately.
 
2012-12-18 06:16:32 PM
Who needs to monkey around with pacemakers? Just hack into the self-driving car and modify the guidance software so it drives into a wall at 65MPH.
 
2012-12-18 06:17:52 PM
Tom Selleck, Gene Simmons / Runaway
 
2012-12-18 06:20:05 PM
Skynet.
 
2012-12-18 06:21:37 PM
tl;dr buy our services
 
2012-12-18 06:22:25 PM
My dad has a defibulator and pacemaker in his heart. Whenever his blood pressure or heart rate gets too high or low his doctor is notified and he receives a phone call to check on him and if it were an emergency an ambulance would be sent. The defibulator will actually send shocks to his heart. When he first got it it was constantly going off because it wasn't tuned correctly. So anyway, none of this stuff surprises me.
 
2012-12-18 06:23:34 PM

KarmicDisaster: " Examples include a pacemaker that can be tuned remotely,"

What does that mean? Tuned to a hip hop station or something? Argh, what's that sound? *thud*


Remotely updating pacemakers and gathering information from them about your status has been possible for nearly seven years.

/and yet the world survives
//you want to kill someone with a pacemaker - punch them in the chest
 
2012-12-18 06:27:42 PM
 
2012-12-18 06:38:02 PM
Don't give those scary mofos any ideas.
 
2012-12-18 06:43:59 PM
www.almc.army.mil
 
2012-12-18 06:50:01 PM
Old news is ooooooooollllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllld!

blog.geeksaresexytech.netdna-cdn.com
 
2012-12-18 06:50:10 PM
 
2012-12-18 06:52:29 PM
I for one cant wait to be able to stab someone in the face over the internet.
 
2012-12-18 06:53:51 PM
Some lameass security CTO that deals in fear-mongering for profit makes a laughable prediction about internet murders?
 
2012-12-18 06:55:15 PM

Diogenes: UberDave: I've got my money on robopocalypse in 10 years.

I think it will be rogue genes of some sort. Although if it's the Internet I suppose rogue memes will do.

HA HA Guy will be the death of us all!


Three billion human lives ended on July 15, 2014. The survivors of the insoluble fire called the war The Grey Wave 2: Electric Boogaloo. They lived only to face a new nightmare: the war against HA HA Guy.
 
2012-12-18 07:05:12 PM

Diogenes: UberDave: I've got my money on robopocalypse in 10 years.

I think it will be rogue genes of some sort. Although if it's the Internet I suppose rogue memes will do.

HA HA Guy will be the death of us all!


Wasn't there an awful TV movie with Sigourney Weaver that had as its plot a computer virus that made crossed the digital - reality divide and was turning humans to piles of dust?
 
2012-12-18 07:14:12 PM
www.uberdevelopment.com
 
2012-12-18 07:16:43 PM
Ok, for the last farking time people, can we STOP INVENTING NEW DOOMSDAY DEADLINES?!

/Not reading TFA because its going to be FW:FW:FW:FW:'ed to me by an aunt or uncle tomorrow morning.
 
2012-12-18 07:26:56 PM
Holy shiat that was some epic story telling
 
2012-12-18 07:40:59 PM

alphabravo42: I for one cant wait to be able to stab someone in the face over the internet.


tenpoundsofcheese may have to wear a boxer's cup every time he logs onto Fark.
 
2012-12-18 07:52:36 PM

Arachnophobe: Diogenes: UberDave: I've got my money on robopocalypse in 10 years.

I think it will be rogue genes of some sort. Although if it's the Internet I suppose rogue memes will do.

HA HA Guy will be the death of us all!

Three billion human lives ended on July 15, 2014. The survivors of the insoluble fire called the war The Grey Wave 2: Electric Boogaloo. They lived only to face a new nightmare: the war against HA HA Guy.


I like memenator 2: Caturday better
 
2012-12-18 07:58:13 PM

HeartBurnKid: Who needs to monkey around with pacemakers? Just hack into the self-driving car and modify the guidance software so it drives into a wall at 65MPH.


amateur. hack the self-driving car so it drives into a hospital
 
2012-12-18 09:41:29 PM
What Mayan Apocalypse? There was never any such thing.
 
2012-12-18 09:53:02 PM

TV's Vinnie: Old news is ooooooooollllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllld!

[blog.geeksaresexytech.netdna-cdn.com image 850x722]


I saw a story like that not too long ago about how they can hack into certain printers, cause them to catch fire and burn your house down.
 
2012-12-18 09:58:47 PM
Well, Cringley said it, so it must be true.
 
2012-12-18 10:13:48 PM
I'm sure it's been done already, I'm willing to bet that some of the countless bombs that have been remotely detonated over the last decade were done via the internet.
 
2012-12-18 11:09:10 PM
And here I assumed that holodeck technology was nearing completion.

/mankind's final invention
 
2012-12-18 11:23:45 PM
fark that. IPv6 will be the actual doomsday.

www.arin.net

Meanwhile, almost nobody is doing anything about converting their networks over to IPv6, and ARIN has been practically shouting WE ARE RUNNING OUT OF IP ADDRESSES!!!

Why would it be doomsday? Well, can you now imagine a world without Internet? I mean one that used to have Internet, and now doesn't. We all use it on a daily basis and everything is so tied into it working that so many things would break without it.
 
2012-12-18 11:40:31 PM

Mad_Radhu: I didn't read TFA because the site won't display correctly on my phone, but I'm guessing that someone has been watching Homeland lately.


"I'm killing you!"
 
2012-12-18 11:47:26 PM

I'm sucking up $289 THOUSAND a year out of my divorce case while my husband, an important and very well compensated executive at GENERAL ELECTRIC refused any custody hearings of our only minor son -- thinking throwing gobs of money at us over the divorce settlement will substitute a father abandoning his son so I've been unemployed and have been brainwashing my son with 'collapse of society' scenarios -- hold on, my son's at the door, he's asking me to check out something on one of the assault rifles I've purchased and have been training him with at firing ranges for these silly 'collapse of civilized society' scenarios -- I'll be getting a kick out of these --

*** BLAM ***
 
2012-12-18 11:51:42 PM
I refuse to have my rights curtailed because someone else abused their right to bear a weapon specifically designed to kill.

The solution is more guns, not less. Had just one of those teachers been armed, no innocent lives would have been lost. The kid broke a window to gain entry to the school -- had anyone with a handgun been available, he could have been shot dead upon entry, carrying rifles into an elementary school building.

Instead, schools are marked 'gun-free' zones, meaning any criminal can shoot fish in a barrel, because absolutely no one else is armed.
 
2012-12-19 03:31:32 AM

alphabravo42: I for one cant wait to be able to stab someone in the face over the internet.


Came to see this joke.

Leaving sati- *thud*
 
2012-12-19 04:36:05 AM

urban.derelict: I refuse to have my rights curtailed because someone else abused their right to bear a weapon specifically designed to kill.

The solution is more guns, not less. Had just one of those teachers been armed, no innocent lives would have been lost. The kid broke a window to gain entry to the school -- had anyone with a handgun been available, he could have been shot dead upon entry, carrying rifles into an elementary school building.

Instead, schools are marked 'gun-free' zones, meaning any criminal can shoot fish in a barrel, because absolutely no one else is armed.


No one else is armed?!? Are you kidding me? I got stabbed in the arm with a compass when I was in grade school and it hurt like hell! You can't tell me that a gunman couldn't be taken down by a ruthless little snot bent on stabbing you with the pointy end of a compass.
 
2012-12-19 11:12:27 AM
i1275.photobucket.com>
 
2012-12-19 03:24:31 PM
cdn0.hark.com
 
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