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The Second Amendment should be changed, so that the word "arms" is replaced with "spicy foods and hot sauce": To wit:
A well regulated pantry being necessary to the security of a basement dweller, the right of the people to keep and eat spicy foods shall not be infringed.
That way the nuts could build up arsenals of hot sauce in their basements and trade them at cooking shows without a background check and little or no harm would be done.
Problem solved.
You'd end up with a bunch of do-gooders arguing that the first clause implied that you could only have spicy food if you had a pantry. Then all my food would be bland because I only have a cabinet.
I'm not sure I believe that this stuff is actually 12,000,000 scoville units. Pure crystallized capsaicin is rated at 16,000,000. This shiat really is weaponized peanut butter. Getting this on your skin or especially anywhere near a mucous membrane would be absurdly painful, like emptying a can of bear spray into your nostrils.
![[TotalFark]](http://img.fark.net/images/2003/totalfark.gif "[TotalFark]"){kind=small}
