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(The Sun)   Darts fan booted out of final because he looked like Jesus and how drunk do you have to be to watch darts live? (w/Jesus pics)   (thesun.co.uk) divider line 75
    More: Obvious, jesus, Nathan Grindal  
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10625 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Dec 2012 at 12:20 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



75 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2012-12-12 10:56:04 PM
i'm thinkin' hay-zeus might have been a few shades darker.
 
2012-12-12 11:12:38 PM
Scottish
 
2012-12-12 11:53:05 PM
You start with not very and by the time of the finals it's I'm the awesomest dart watcher in the history of totally cool dart watchers, those chicks totally dig me.

/darts at He's Not Here in Chapel Hill was teh fun
 
2012-12-13 12:03:44 AM
You mean I should remove "Dart Disciple" from my resume?
 
2012-12-13 12:23:57 AM
What a darts fan might look like:

img826.imageshack.us
 
2012-12-13 12:25:44 AM
oooooOOOOOOONNNNNNEEEHHHUUUUUUNNNNNNNDREDandEIEEIIIGGGHHHHHTTTYYYYYYY! !!!!!

vossiewulf: You start with not very and by the time of the finals it's I'm the awesomest dart watcher in the history of totally cool dart watchers, those chicks totally dig me.

/darts at He's Not Here in Chapel Hill was teh fun


Played out of Fayettenam in the mid-80's. North Carolina had a great darts scene.
 
2012-12-13 12:27:33 AM
The War on Christmas continues.

Thanks, Liberals!!
 
2012-12-13 12:28:49 AM
"He didn't call me 'Jesus'. He said, "Hey, Zeus." My name is Zeus."

"Zeus?"

"Yeah, Zeus. As in father of Apollo, god of Mount Olympus, don't fark with me or I'll shove a lightning bolt up your ass, Zeus!:
 
2012-12-13 12:30:14 AM
Hell, I could watch this all day!

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2012-12-13 12:30:31 AM
Looks, meebe, more like an Allman bro from the classic era than Jeebus.
 
2012-12-13 12:31:15 AM
NEWSFLASH: Jesus wasn't white.

/scroll at 11
 
2012-12-13 12:31:15 AM
He said: "There was a lot of chanting of Jesus and I think to avoid it becoming too much of a distraction for the players he was taken by security to another part of the complex."

Mr Allen added: "There is plenty of audience participation. They are encouraged to support the players within certain boundaries."


So, he was ejected because the other fans were being total assholes and distracting the players.

The fact they can buy four-pint pitchers certainly helps.

Yes. Yes, I'm certain it does.
 
2012-12-13 12:32:41 AM
Subby, have you seen some of those darts live audiences? Those people start drinking at least 4 hours before it begins. They get way too into it.
 
2012-12-13 12:34:33 AM
60 60 60
180

*crickets*
 
2012-12-13 12:35:32 AM
Not all dart enthusiasts need be drunk to be assholes.

i9.photobucket.com 

/9 something. . .never forget
 
2012-12-13 12:35:47 AM
imageshack.us
 
2012-12-13 12:36:59 AM
i'm thinker than you drunk i am
 
2012-12-13 12:42:23 AM
I watched darts once on the internet. For like several hours, and it wasn't all that bad. Not something I would do everyday, but something that is good to have on in the background, like at a bar.
 
2012-12-13 12:43:00 AM

red5ish: [imageshack.us image 400x321]


The fark is that?
 
2012-12-13 12:44:24 AM

studebaker hoch: NEWSFLASH: Jesus wasn't white.

/scroll at 11


You dont know that. maybe he glowed with a white light. you simply dont know. you THINK you know, but you dont know.
 
2012-12-13 12:49:05 AM
blogs.miaminewtimes.com

or a ginger.
 
2012-12-13 12:49:35 AM

K3rmy: Not all dart enthusiasts need be drunk to be assholes.

[i9.photobucket.com image 400x400] 

/9 something. . .never forget

 

Came for the Zima S Defita. Leaving smug.
 
2012-12-13 12:49:49 AM

Linkster: red5ish: [imageshack.us image 400x321]

The fark is that?



I know, but I'm not telling. What I want to know is, why the fark are his hands glowing?
 
2012-12-13 12:52:02 AM
images.tribe.net

rlv.zcache.co.uk
 
2012-12-13 12:52:03 AM

adeist69: Linkster: red5ish: [imageshack.us image 400x321]

The fark is that?


I know, but I'm not telling. What I want to know is, why the fark are his hands glowing?


That's not white, it's translucent!
 
2012-12-13 12:52:14 AM
3.bp.blogspot.comwww.bagofnothing.com
I don't see it. 
 
2012-12-13 12:52:16 AM

K3rmy: Not all dart enthusiasts need be drunk to be assholes.

[i9.photobucket.com image 400x400] 

/9 something. . .never forget


oi47.tinypic.com
 
2012-12-13 12:52:52 AM
Wasn't Jesus from the middle east? that guy looks Irish.
 
2012-12-13 12:54:01 AM
This is literally the dumbest thing evar.
1. Jesus was Gaelic?
2. How would someone know what Jesus looks like anyway? (other than looking middle eastern)
3. Why would someone get kicked out over something like this?
I mean, I look more like Jesus than this guy (and I'm actually Jewish, too).
 
2012-12-13 12:54:14 AM

Linkster: red5ish: [imageshack.us image 400x321]

The fark is that?


Just what it looks like, a deluxe Jesus action figure. it's deluxe because it comes with fish, loaves and a wine jug.
Oh, and his hands glow in the dark. Merry Christmas!
 
2012-12-13 12:54:37 AM
He looks more like Zach Galifianakis in a wig.
 
2012-12-13 12:55:15 AM
its almost exactly how i would have pictured the return of jesus...

Crowd "*gasp its jesus!"

authority figures " GET HIM "
 
2012-12-13 12:55:55 AM

Linkster: adeist69: Linkster: red5ish: [imageshack.us image 400x321]

The fark is that?


I know, but I'm not telling. What I want to know is, why the fark are his hands glowing?

That's not white, it's translucent!


Transfiguration?
 
2012-12-13 12:56:14 AM
I wonder if he ever gets kicked out of church
 
2012-12-13 12:59:54 AM

BlousyBrown: I wonder if he ever gets kicked out of church


I wonder if he ever gets kicked out of Bee Gees reunion concerts.
 
2012-12-13 01:00:28 AM
Meh - A friend of mine looked more like Jesus (classic white Jesus, not what he probably looked like in reality) than that and I've played in darts tournaments.

People who play and watch darts are usually drunk. This should not come as a surprise to Farkers.
 
2012-12-13 01:00:41 AM
i1.mirror.co.uk
3.bp.blogspot.com



Striking resemblance.
 
2012-12-13 01:00:46 AM
RED HEADED JESUS
I've always wanted to say that.
 
2012-12-13 01:01:46 AM

BlousyBrown: I wonder if he ever gets kicked out of church


Better if he was asked to Preach!
 
2012-12-13 01:02:40 AM
How drunk do you have to be before that guy starts looking like Jesus?
 
2012-12-13 01:21:38 AM
The odds of Jesus being some skinny white guy who was a carpenter in that part of the world in that era with no power tools or other white people is pretty remote.
 
2012-12-13 01:21:56 AM
I had a '75 that started life with a 318. It ended life with a 440 bored and stroked to 489. I didn't learn my lesson, so then I got a '68. So, yeah, I guess I'm a fan.
 
2012-12-13 01:26:22 AM
Looks more like Steve Cropper than Jesus.

img.photobucket.com
 
2012-12-13 01:26:25 AM
I once spent a night in jail with Jesus.

He looked nothing like that guy.
 
2012-12-13 01:28:01 AM

bunner: The odds of Jesus being some skinny white guy who was a carpenter in that part of the world in that era with no power tools or other white people is pretty remote.



Ask Mary Magdalene about Jesus' "power tool".
 
2012-12-13 01:29:56 AM

K3rmy: Not all dart enthusiasts need be drunk to be assholes.


The worst ones back in my dart playing days were the reformed alcoholics who drank coffee all night. I used to hate playing with these assholes, and remembered them as being a lot more fun when they were drunks.
 
2012-12-13 01:34:55 AM
You don't have to be that drunk when you live on an island that has Benny Hill for their main entertainment (and most think its funny) besides soccer and your nearest neighbor is France.
 
2012-12-13 01:36:24 AM

DownDaRiver: You don't have to be that drunk when you live on an island that has Benny Hill for their main entertainment (and most think its funny) besides soccer and your nearest neighbor is France.


If my nearest neighbor was France it'd give me something to throw the darts at.
 
2012-12-13 01:42:36 AM
Goddamn Allman Brothers screw everything up.
 
2012-12-13 01:48:46 AM
Dino M. Zaffina does not approve.
 
2012-12-13 01:52:34 AM
I'm more surprised by the existence of what appears to be a dart-specific shirt.
 
2012-12-13 01:54:40 AM

Phil Moskowitz: Goddamn Allman Brothers screw everything up.


What Jesus would have looked like if he were blond:

userserve-ak.last.fm
 
2012-12-13 02:00:30 AM
I thought he looked like Chuck Norris with a wig. Why didn't he end all the confusion with a roundhouse kick? Or maybe start selling the Total Gym and scam cash out of people?
 
2012-12-13 02:24:45 AM
All that and no one paying attention to Hulk Hogan at the end of the clip? I'd be more worried about Hogan
 
2012-12-13 02:25:49 AM

JudgeMuttonChops: K3rmy: Not all dart enthusiasts need be drunk to be assholes.

[i9.photobucket.com image 400x400] 

/9 something. . .never forget

[oi47.tinypic.com image 330x472]


The 'M' stands for motherfarker.
 
2012-12-13 02:55:46 AM
It makes a change from chanting abuse at brown people...
 
2012-12-13 03:13:06 AM
Historical Jesus frowns on your shenanigans...

/cue Shortpacked
 
2012-12-13 03:27:56 AM

Baron Harkonnen: How drunk do you have to be before that guy starts looking like Jesus?


Drunk enough to watch a darts tournament at Butlins.
 
2012-12-13 03:46:11 AM
 
2012-12-13 03:51:22 AM
He looks more like a teenage Chuck Norris.
 
2012-12-13 03:53:08 AM
Or the drummer I suppose...

Does anyone else remember Topless Darts on british television?
 
2012-12-13 05:52:45 AM
I play darts weekly with a groups mostly made up of WW2 and Korea veterans. (We seem to do a lot more drinking than playing, which is fine with me). Some of those men ca barely walk under their own power anymore, but jeebus they can hit damn near anything they want on that board when it's their turn to throw.
 
2012-12-13 07:00:08 AM
He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy....
 
2012-12-13 07:07:22 AM

Happy Hours: Phil Moskowitz: Goddamn Allman Brothers screw everything up.

What Jesus would have looked like if he were blond:

[userserve-ak.last.fm image 252x256]


Greg Allman lives in my hometown, so getting a kick, etc.

I was ok with crowd reaction here, up until one of the darters said he would crucify this guy if he ever saw him.
 
2012-12-13 07:51:18 AM
i.ytimg.com
"Praise white Jesus!"
 
2012-12-13 07:57:29 AM
Jesus was a ginger?
 
2012-12-13 08:10:53 AM
If anyone's interested, this guy tried watching darts: http://www.grantland.com/story/_/id/82 85922/missing-olympics-introduce -world-professional-darts
 
2012-12-13 08:24:15 AM

Meatybrain: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 258x388][www.bagofnothing.com image 278x388]
I don't see it.


Thanks.

He might look a little like White Jesus TM, but nothing like real Jesus. Didn't God say something about graven images of himself, and isn't Jesus just God The Son, who is God in mortal form, and all that?

Which rules are we following today Christians?
 
2012-12-13 09:11:07 AM

LewDux: [images.tribe.net image 274x301]



came for this, leaving satisfied
 
2012-12-13 09:25:17 AM
Why would I want to watch darts when I can watch Numberwang!!1!
 
2012-12-13 11:52:19 AM

davidphogan: Dino M. Zaffina does not approve.



I thought his name was Dina Zaffino. Now I'm confused.
 
2012-12-13 01:27:08 PM
That guy wouldn't last two days in the desert.

These other people are being jackholes... let's kick this guy out.
 
2012-12-13 10:11:57 PM

Mock26: Looks more like Steve Cropper than Jesus.

[img.photobucket.com image 320x240]


I agree but possibly he was wearing a robe at the time so that doesn't help in these situations .
 
2012-12-14 02:41:55 AM

Meatybrain: I don't see it.


img255.imageshack.us

How about now?
 
2012-12-14 10:19:19 PM
I sound fat

studebaker hoch: NEWSFLASH: Jesus wasn't white.

/scroll at 11

You dont know that. maybe he glowed with a white light. you simply dont know. you THINK you know, but you dont know.


I guess by that line of reasoning, you don't know that I'm not Jesus H. Christ himself.

Nice bit of reasoning there, you got me.
 
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