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(FilmDrunk)   The absolute very worst movies of 2012   (filmdrunk.uproxx.com) divider line 222
    More: Amusing, bad movies, American Reunion, Happy Madison, Steve Harvey, Caddyshack, Diane Keaton, Adam Sandler, Bill Burr  
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17772 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 12 Dec 2012 at 9:33 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-12 10:08:07 PM

DamnYankees: robsul82: Old Man Winter: Has it been long enough to point out Prometheus and The Dark Knight Rises both sucked major donkey balls? I don't want to get flamed by every 17 year-old fanboy here, but I think we are far enough away from those movies to say that now.

While I appreciate how incredibly dedicated you are to making everyone aware of how you go against the grain, Prometheus was the biggest disappointment of the year, indeed.

And it was still a beautiful, well acted movie with some very interesting ideas. That it was so disappointing and yet pretty decent is just a testament to how insanely high the potential was.


Yeah, I'd go along with that.
 
2012-12-12 10:08:29 PM

Gergesa: This person doesn't know what bad films are. Those of us who have watched Uwe Boll films know what constitutes a bad film.


There's bad and then there's "Go get a bigger mop, the whole audience committed hara-kiri again."
 
2012-12-12 10:09:34 PM

DamnYankees: Hebalo: Buddy of mine works on films, so I asked him who the best and worst stars he'd worked with were. Best, he instantly answered "Kate Beckinsale" (duh!). Worst, he was reluctant to say, but finally blurted out "Channing Tatum".

What do you mean by best and worst? Like, she's nice and he's an asshole?


Pretty much. My buddy does SFX work and creature shop stuff. So any stars he's working with are there for a while. It's the whole "we're working together for a long time, and it's easier to be pleasant to one another than pull "star" bullshiat.

He also has a great attitude towards hiring members for the team. He said that by the time the resume makes it to him, everyone is pretty close to the same skill level. He has the applicant tell him a joke. The theory is that they'll be spending a lot of time together, so why not hire someone interesting/funny.
 
2012-12-12 10:10:23 PM

DamnYankees: You're so hip.


Stop disliking what I like!
 
2012-12-12 10:10:56 PM
Prometheus was visually awesome and I thought the acting was good to great. The plot was just a hot farking mess, to the point I'm not even interested in a sequel. Glad I saw it, but way over hyped.
 
2012-12-12 10:10:58 PM
The list is fail without "The Master".

It was so bad I wanted to pluck out my eyeballs and stuff them in my ears so I could be spared both the sight and sounds of that pretentious, aimless, and boring POS monstrosity.
 
2012-12-12 10:12:53 PM

Shrugging Atlas: Prometheus was visually awesome and I thought the acting was good to great. The plot was just a hot farking mess, to the point I'm not even interested in a sequel. Glad I saw it, but way over hyped.


I'd agree with that.

Noomi Rapace deserved better.
 
2012-12-12 10:14:37 PM

Plant Rights Activist: Old Man Winter: Has it been long enough to point out Prometheus and The Dark Knight Rises both sucked major donkey balls? I don't want to get flamed by every 17 year-old fanboy here, but I think we are far enough away from those movies to say that now.

still haven't watched dark knight yet but Prometheus was just overhyped. It wasn't terrible. It just wasn't good.


Skyfall was the most overhyped imho. It was good, but the reviews and first people out of the theatre were jizzing themselves over it. It was.... decent, but hardly one of the best.
 
2012-12-12 10:15:47 PM

robsul82: DamnYankees: robsul82: Old Man Winter: Has it been long enough to point out Prometheus and The Dark Knight Rises both sucked major donkey balls? I don't want to get flamed by every 17 year-old fanboy here, but I think we are far enough away from those movies to say that now.

While I appreciate how incredibly dedicated you are to making everyone aware of how you go against the grain, Prometheus was the biggest disappointment of the year, indeed.

And it was still a beautiful, well acted movie with some very interesting ideas. That it was so disappointing and yet pretty decent is just a testament to how insanely high the potential was.

Yeah, I'd go along with that.


I'll take issue there. I didn't even want to see it, but I expected to be entertained. It failed even on that level. And my wife, who REALLY wanted to see it, almost burst into tears at the end because she was so disappointed and she had hyped it up to me ahead of time. My wife cannot stand to be wrong. About anything. If she wants to cry about being wrong, she has to know she's really chosen to back the wrong horse.

So that's my impression of Prometheus - a movie so bad my wife realized she was wrong about something.
 
2012-12-12 10:16:25 PM
The only movie I've seen on this list was "Bourne" (on a plane) And it was very disappoint

Why would anyone even take a chance on the other movies?
 
2012-12-12 10:19:50 PM

robsul82: Really loved Cloud Atlas, fark all y'all.


Still haven't seen it, and I have no idea what to expect. A few different movie reviewers I like a lot more or less had the same opinion; flawed, but so "holy sh*t epic" in almost every regard that you at least walk away impressed with the effort.
 
2012-12-12 10:20:34 PM
I'm honestly surprised the latest Resident Evil movie didn't make that list. The entire franchise is pretty lackluster, but Retribution is the absolute worst of all of them.
 
2012-12-12 10:28:20 PM
Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter could have been so much better if they had just followed more of the book. Which is strange because the novel writer and screenwriter was the same guy. He butchered his own book. Like the core relationship of the book was between Lincoln and the vampire, Sturges. They were friends. Further more, Sturges actually cared for Lincoln so much that he couldn't let him die after he had been shot. He turned Lincoln. In the movie, they seem sort of like friends. More like Sturges was just using Lincoln as another Human weapon in a long line of Human weapons.

/still like Dominic Cooper as Sturges though...
//he would have been even more brilliant if they kept it closer to Book!Sturges though...
 
2012-12-12 10:32:34 PM

Apos: Precisely. Silly of us to have expected a cogent narrative from the duo responsible for The Matrix Revolutions, eh?


Well, it wasn't that the narrative wasn't cogent. It was just that it was insubstantial, just like the book's narrative.

It said everything it wanted to say very loudly, then left you feeling not terribly moved and not terribly entertained. Worse of all, it didn't leave you very upset at spending time on it either.

Going back to bad movies from this year, I also saw Pitch Perfect. Besides a half dozen incredible "wait, they said that?" lines, the writing was terrible and the acting was worse. Let's not even get started on the music.
 
2012-12-12 10:32:54 PM
Took my granddaughter to Snow White. I actually LOL'ed at the deer. Loudly. Embarassingly loudly. I couldn't help it, it was that stupid.

Spiderman was also bad, except for the parts with Leary, who is really a good actor.

Didn't see anything else on the list, primarily because you can tell ahead of time when a movie is going to be really bad. I knew before they even cast it that the 3 Stooges movie would suck, and I said so in a thread. Abe Lincoln Vampire Hunter? Please...you just know that it is going to be bad. The first time I saw the trailer for it, the whole theater busted out laughing. Not a good sign. And Sandler, well...let's just say if Gilbert Gottfried's voice were a person, it would be Adam Sandler.
 
2012-12-12 10:33:20 PM
Is it too much to want a 2013 free from Adam Sandler?
 
2012-12-12 10:34:44 PM
Silver Linings Playbook was definitely my least favorite movie of the year. Completely irritating, awful movie that seems to be getting good reviews.
 
2012-12-12 10:34:51 PM

Imperious Rex!: I'm honestly surprised the latest Resident Evil movie didn't make that list. The entire franchise is pretty lackluster, but Retribution is the absolute worst of all of them.


That's the only one of the Resident Evil franchise I didn't even finish. I got 2/3 of the way through and ended up cleaning my bathroom or something.
 
2012-12-12 10:36:19 PM
I liked Sinister. It was a bit predictable, but horror movies lately have set a low bar.
 
2012-12-12 10:38:19 PM

robsul82: Really loved Cloud Atlas, fark all y'all.


I thoroughly enjoyed it as well, so fark you too!
 
2012-12-12 10:38:58 PM
Wow, did I just see Channing Tatum get compared to Daniel Day-Lewis?
 
2012-12-12 10:43:15 PM

Apos: #1 was another absurdly hilarious Bekmambetov offering and does NOT belong with the rest of the swill.

Yes, I said it.


I saw it hoping for an absurd good time, but it was honestly not that great even for a brainless action movie. After this, and the horrible things that he did to the Wanted comic storyline, I'm starting to think that maybe he's been a little overhyped as a director because of the Night Watch movies. If he doesn't put out a really awesome movie soon, he's headed straight for M. Night Shyamalan-ville.
 
2012-12-12 10:45:59 PM
What about TAKEN 2?
 
2012-12-12 10:47:46 PM

mekki: Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter could have been so much better if they had just followed more of the book. Which is strange because the novel writer and screenwriter was the same guy. He butchered his own book. Like the core relationship of the book was between Lincoln and the vampire, Sturges. They were friends. Further more, Sturges actually cared for Lincoln so much that he couldn't let him die after he had been shot. He turned Lincoln. In the movie, they seem sort of like friends. More like Sturges was just using Lincoln as another Human weapon in a long line of Human weapons.

/still like Dominic Cooper as Sturges though...
//he would have been even more brilliant if they kept it closer to Book!Sturges though...


Generally movie writers in Hollywood have to do what they are told. The studio/director/producer/lead actor will tell them they want something changed and they have to do it. You have to be a established writer/director like Woody Allen or QT to be able to write what you want. Writers are treated like dirt. Writers are often not invited to the wrap party or even the premier. The WGA even had to insist on a clause in the standard contract allowing the writer to visit the set if they wished, and even then IIRC it only requires two days during shooting, with prior arrangement of the director.

/TV writers are a whole different matter.
 
2012-12-12 10:51:18 PM
FYI if you don't like the stupid movies that I like it means you're trying to be hip and it's pathetic. I pity you.
 
2012-12-12 10:51:28 PM
Could someone explain the motivation behind the actions of the aliens in Prometheus? Create then destroy the creation? Some sort of statement about certain gods? "To Serve Man"? What? Not surprisingly, went right over my friggin head.
 
2012-12-12 10:51:34 PM
List fails, Amazing Spider-Man was actually pretty good. And the CGI and 3D effects were even better than Prometheus. What it sorely missed was J. Jonah Jameson.
 
2012-12-12 10:52:42 PM
img201.imageshack.us

^ Well, that was surprisingly honest.
 
2012-12-12 10:52:52 PM

Imperious Rex!: I'm honestly surprised the latest Resident Evil movie didn't make that list. The entire franchise is pretty lackluster, but Retribution is the absolute worst of all of them.


It was better than the last one. Yes though, it was awful.
 
2012-12-12 10:55:31 PM

Pocket Ninja: And, on a serious note, was the new Bourne movie really that terrible? I didn't see it, but was thinking about getting it on Amazon. I love the first three.


Rental. No new ground but entertaining. But I like Jeremy Renner. The story minimizes the Jason Bourne stuff as THIS guy is streets ahead of him but you wouldn't know it to watch his asskicked.
 
2012-12-12 10:57:45 PM
I thought The Campaign was freaking hilarious
 
2012-12-12 11:00:45 PM
Killing Them Softly was the worst movie Ive seen this year, and I saw Dredd 3D (which was awesome in a terrible sort of way). I just kept waiting for something interesting or exciting to happen, and it never did. It's like it wanted to be Drive, but had none of the sweet sweet Ryan Gosling.
 
2012-12-12 11:02:59 PM

Flint Ironstag: /TV writers are a whole different matter.


I thought the reason why the quality (and quantity) of many TV dramas (particularly on the cable/premium networks) over the last decade plus has increased was in part because talented writers becoming disillusioned/disenfranchised/utterly annoyed with the film industry were flocking to THAT medium instead.

You have 9,000 cable channels now that need to fill their schedules with content. You do get a buttload of reality TV programming as result, but, also, some also stuff like The Walking Dead and Breaking Bad on f*cking AMC of all places.
 
2012-12-12 11:03:11 PM
For every movie on that list, you're bound to find several folks who will announce "Sure, it wasn't the greatest, but it totally doesn't deserve to be on the worst of 2012 list". In the case of Snow White and the Huntsman, please make a note that I'm that guy.
 
2012-12-12 11:08:40 PM
Hands down the worst movie my wife and I have ever seen was "The Tribe". Just don't do it. You've been warned.
 
2012-12-12 11:10:02 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: American Reunion made me sad for all the people who refuse to let 1999 rot away peacefully.


Ali Cobrin did not make me sad.
 
2012-12-12 11:12:59 PM

MrHappyRotter: For every movie on that list, you're bound to find several folks who will announce "Sure, it wasn't the greatest, but it totally doesn't deserve to be on the worst of 2012 list". In the case of Snow White and the Huntsman, please make a note that I'm that guy.


The effects for Snow White and the Huntsman were great and the premise was good. It had so much potential, they just didnt capitalize on it. Make it a half hour shorter and replace Kristen Stewart with someone that could be considered "fair" and we have a pretty good movie.
 
2012-12-12 11:13:49 PM
Prometheus

Just watched it on dvd


I am happy they all died.

The movie sucked so hard, so hard.
 
2012-12-12 11:14:08 PM

Swoop1809: MrHappyRotter: For every movie on that list, you're bound to find several folks who will announce "Sure, it wasn't the greatest, but it totally doesn't deserve to be on the worst of 2012 list". In the case of Snow White and the Huntsman, please make a note that I'm that guy.

The effects for Snow White and the Huntsman were great and the premise was good. It had so much potential, they just didnt capitalize on it. Make it a half hour shorter and replace Kristen Stewart with someone that could be considered "fair" and we have a pretty good movie.


Kristen Stewart single-handedly killed the movie for me. Horribly miscast.
 
2012-12-12 11:20:35 PM

you are a puppet: Imperious Rex!: I'm honestly surprised the latest Resident Evil movie didn't make that list. The entire franchise is pretty lackluster, but Retribution is the absolute worst of all of them.

It was better than the last one. Yes though, it was awful.


See, I actually really liked that one (aside from the clone stuff in the beginning, though I know it needed to be dealt with). Seeing it in 3D was pretty nice to, one of the only good 3D live action movies imo. Even the 3D for Retribution sucked ass.
 
2012-12-12 11:24:29 PM
I gladly saw none of those.

The few decent films I saw included Looper, umm and I'm not sure what else. Prometheus was just kind of a mess, & I wanted to like it. Don't care about the beaten-to-death coloring-book movies, and I can't think of anything else that was very interesting. 'Safety Not Guaranteed' was ok but overrated. 'Ted' got old pretty quickly. I dont think I saw one decent comedy this year. Last good comedy I saw was The Guard, that was last year.

/movies just blow these days if you have any requirements above 'uhhhhhh it was ok i guess - I liked the asplosions'
 
2012-12-12 11:25:43 PM

Marshmallow Jones: /movies just blow these days if you have any requirements above 'uhhhhhh it was ok i guess - I liked the asplosions'


Yes, you're so discerning. We get it.
 
2012-12-12 11:26:25 PM
There were two movies named Battleship. One of them was very bad, the other one was worse.
 
2012-12-12 11:29:30 PM
Oh God, the only movie from this year I've seen was Prometheus. And I only watched that to make fun of it.
 
2012-12-12 11:31:09 PM

red5ish: There were two movies named Battleship. One of them was very bad, the other one was worse.


I'm guessing the "worse" one was a SyFy channel ripoff....Correct?
 
2012-12-12 11:33:50 PM

DamnYankees: Swoop1809: MrHappyRotter: For every movie on that list, you're bound to find several folks who will announce "Sure, it wasn't the greatest, but it totally doesn't deserve to be on the worst of 2012 list". In the case of Snow White and the Huntsman, please make a note that I'm that guy.

The effects for Snow White and the Huntsman were great and the premise was good. It had so much potential, they just didnt capitalize on it. Make it a half hour shorter and replace Kristen Stewart with someone that could be considered "fair" and we have a pretty good movie.

Kristen Stewart single-handedly killed the movie for me. Horribly miscast.


Yeah please tell me how this..

s.wsj.net

is fairer this this...

img2.timeinc.net
 
2012-12-12 11:34:38 PM

Old Man Winter: Has it been long enough to point out Prometheus and The Dark Knight Rises both sucked major donkey balls? I don't want to get flamed by every 17 year-old fanboy here, but I think we are far enough away from those movies to say that now.


TDKR was one of the best movies of the year. Flawed, but still intelligent and fun, with good characters, good visuals, and a good story.

Prometheus was... decent. Very flawed, but it had some good material. The biggest letdown was that the characters had a tendency of behaving like chickens with their heads cut off. The alien origins were cool, however.
 
2012-12-12 11:35:31 PM

mjones73: DamnYankees: Swoop1809: MrHappyRotter: For every movie on that list, you're bound to find several folks who will announce "Sure, it wasn't the greatest, but it totally doesn't deserve to be on the worst of 2012 list". In the case of Snow White and the Huntsman, please make a note that I'm that guy.

The effects for Snow White and the Huntsman were great and the premise was good. It had so much potential, they just didnt capitalize on it. Make it a half hour shorter and replace Kristen Stewart with someone that could be considered "fair" and we have a pretty good movie.

Kristen Stewart single-handedly killed the movie for me. Horribly miscast.

Yeah please tell me how this..

[s.wsj.net image 262x394]

is fairer this this...

[img2.timeinc.net image 300x400]


Well, she never moves her face, so there won't be a lot of wrinkles.
 
2012-12-12 11:38:50 PM

mjones73: DamnYankees: Swoop1809: MrHappyRotter: For every movie on that list, you're bound to find several folks who will announce "Sure, it wasn't the greatest, but it totally doesn't deserve to be on the worst of 2012 list". In the case of Snow White and the Huntsman, please make a note that I'm that guy.

The effects for Snow White and the Huntsman were great and the premise was good. It had so much potential, they just didnt capitalize on it. Make it a half hour shorter and replace Kristen Stewart with someone that could be considered "fair" and we have a pretty good movie.

Kristen Stewart single-handedly killed the movie for me. Horribly miscast.

Yeah please tell me how this..

[s.wsj.net image 262x394]

is fairer this this...

[img2.timeinc.net image 300x400]


The mirror digs brunettes?
 
2012-12-12 11:39:21 PM

Hebalo:
Skyfall was the most overhyped imho. It was good, but the reviews and first people out of the theatre were jizzing themselves over it. It was.... decent, but hardly one of the best.


SKYFALL SPOILERS BELOW IF YOU HAVENT SEEN BUT....

Let me see if I have the plot of Skyfall down. A former MI6 supervillain devises perhaps the most ludicrous plot of all time to get caught by MI6 so he can use an insanely complicated polymorphic computer virus to escape and then kill M, even though Bond can quite easily break into M's house at night, as we saw in basically every movie. Then Bond comes up with a "plan" in which he will let two dozen people attack him in a shoddy castle in the middle of farking nowhere while telling no one where he is going, because it's not like they could have figured out a low tech way of communicating with other law enforcement. Oh and M dies in the end anyway, so basically the whole thing was a total failure.

What. The. fark.
 
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