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(FilmDrunk)   The absolute very worst movies of 2012   (filmdrunk.uproxx.com) divider line 222
    More: Amusing, bad movies, American Reunion, Happy Madison, Steve Harvey, Caddyshack, Diane Keaton, Adam Sandler, Bill Burr  
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17772 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 12 Dec 2012 at 9:33 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-12 08:18:37 PM  
DNRTFA but Cloud Atlas, Killing Me Softly and Playing For Keeps should be on the list.
 
2012-12-12 08:36:51 PM  
I can attest that "That's My Boy" was the worst movie of 2012, and might be the worst movie ever made.
 
2012-12-12 08:39:09 PM  
At least the farking asshats had the courtesy to list the tags so you didn't have to click through their stupid slideshow. Here, I'll make it so you don't even have to click the link:

ABRAHAM LINCOLN VAMPIRE HUNTER,
ADAM SANDLER,
ALEX CROSS,
AMERICAN REUNION,
BATTLESHIP,
HAPPY MADISON,
HERE COMES THE BOOM,
JOYFUL NOISE,
MIRROR MIRROR,
NATURE CALLS,
PLAYING FOR KEEPS,
RED DAWN,
ROCK OF AGES,
SNOW WHITE AND THE HUNTSMAN,
THAT'S MY BOY,
THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN,
THE BOURNE LEGACY,
THE THREE STOOGES,
THE VOW,
 
2012-12-12 08:45:37 PM  

Pocket Ninja: At least the farking asshats had the courtesy to list the tags so you didn't have to click through their stupid slideshow. Here, I'll make it so you don't even have to click the link:

ABRAHAM LINCOLN VAMPIRE HUNTER,
ADAM SANDLER,
ALEX CROSS,
AMERICAN REUNION,
BATTLESHIP,
HAPPY MADISON,
HERE COMES THE BOOM,
JOYFUL NOISE,
MIRROR MIRROR,
NATURE CALLS,
PLAYING FOR KEEPS,
RED DAWN,
ROCK OF AGES,
SNOW WHITE AND THE HUNTSMAN,
THAT'S MY BOY,
THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN,
THE BOURNE LEGACY,
THE THREE STOOGES,
THE VOW,


#1 was another absurdly hilarious Bekmambetov offering and does NOT belong with the rest of the swill.

Yes, I said it.
 
2012-12-12 08:47:23 PM  
Yesterday I went out for cocktails with an ex and she recommended The Campaign but she dated me so we already know she has terrible taste.  LOL FML YOLO.
 
2012-12-12 08:47:25 PM  
Of this list, I've only seen Snow White, Spiderman and The Vow. None were terrible, none were great.
 
2012-12-12 08:56:52 PM  

Pocket Ninja: At least the farking asshats had the courtesy to list the tags so you didn't have to click through their stupid slideshow. Here, I'll make it so you don't even have to click the link:

ABRAHAM LINCOLN VAMPIRE HUNTER,
ADAM SANDLER,
ALEX CROSS,
AMERICAN REUNION,
BATTLESHIP,
HAPPY MADISON,
HERE COMES THE BOOM,
JOYFUL NOISE,
MIRROR MIRROR,
NATURE CALLS,
PLAYING FOR KEEPS,
RED DAWN,
ROCK OF AGES,
SNOW WHITE AND THE HUNTSMAN,
THAT'S MY BOY,
THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN,
THE BOURNE LEGACY,
THE THREE STOOGES,
THE VOW,


there is a link to "view as one page" directly below the tags.
 
2012-12-12 09:13:30 PM  
The Amazing Spider-Man wasn't *that* bad.


Lsherm: I can attest that "That's My Boy" was the worst movie of 2012, and might be the worst movie ever made.


Considering the people responsible, I do not doubt that.



thomps: there is a link to "view as one page" directly below the tags.


But that would involve reading and words and shiat.

AIN'T NOBODY GOT TIME FOR THAT
 
2012-12-12 09:17:07 PM  
And, on a serious note, was the new Bourne movie really that terrible? I didn't see it, but was thinking about getting it on Amazon. I love the first three.
 
2012-12-12 09:21:11 PM  

DamnYankees: The Vow


I can't speak for everyone, but Channing Tatum taking a break from acting next year is like Daniel Day-Lewis taking a break from acting.

We are all the poorer for it.


Apos: #1 was another absurdly hilarious Bekmambetov offering and does NOT belong with the rest of the swill.

Yes, I said it.


American Reunion made me sad for all the people who refuse to let 1999 rot away peacefully. It's okay. Sugar Ray would understand if you wanted to move on.
 
2012-12-12 09:25:22 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: I can't speak for everyone, but Channing Tatum taking a break from acting next year is like Daniel Day-Lewis taking a break from acting.

We are all the poorer for it.


I kind of like him, actually.
 
2012-12-12 09:26:57 PM  

DamnYankees: I kind of like him, actually.


Likewise.

I was pleasantly surprised by what Channing Tatum brought to 21 Jump Street.

And that's a sentence I'd never imagine typing.
 
2012-12-12 09:28:41 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: DamnYankees: The Vow

I can't speak for everyone, but Channing Tatum taking a break from acting next year is like Daniel Day-Lewis taking a break from acting.

We are all the poorer for it.


Apos: #1 was another absurdly hilarious Bekmambetov offering and does NOT belong with the rest of the swill.

Yes, I said it.

American Reunion made me sad for all the people who refuse to let 1999 rot away peacefully. It's okay. Sugar Ray would understand if you wanted to move on.


*Nodding* It was plain to see that it was a horribly misguided notion, perhaps one of the worst cash grabs in cinematic history. Real head-scratcher as to why it was greenlit.
 
2012-12-12 09:34:51 PM  
I just watched Battleship the night before last

/it still stinks in here
//damn... that was.... damn
 
2012-12-12 09:36:45 PM  

Apos: *Nodding* It was plain to see that it was a horribly misguided notion, perhaps one of the worst cash grabs in cinematic history. Real head-scratcher as to why it was greenlit.


There's that whole unfortunate mode of thought that dictates: "Well, it's a recognizable brand, therefore, people will see this because it's stuff they recognize."

Sadly, when a movie made for $50 million pulls in $234 million, the studio execs will scream "IT WORKED" and keep chugging along that path as soon as they come down from their rampant illicit substance binges.
 
2012-12-12 09:38:40 PM  
I have not seen a single one of those movies. And I like bad movies.
 
2012-12-12 09:41:14 PM  

js34603: I have not seen a single one of those movies. And I like bad movies.


To my understanding, That's My Boy isn't a movie you see.

It's a movie you endure.

And as someone who loves bad movies (and caught only a fraction of Bucky Larson before fighting the urge to call Netflix and tearfully ask why they make that available to the masses), I will not go anywhere near it.
 
2012-12-12 09:45:47 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: js34603: I have not seen a single one of those movies. And I like bad movies.

To my understanding, That's My Boy isn't a movie you see.

It's a movie you endure.

And as someone who loves bad movies (and caught only a fraction of Bucky Larson before fighting the urge to call Netflix and tearfully ask why they make that available to the masses), I will not go anywhere near it.


The ads for Bucky Larson were clearly not aimed at my demographic, and I was grateful when I no longer had to endure even them.

I do hope someone was made to suffer for all of that nonsense.
 
2012-12-12 09:45:48 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Apos: *Nodding* It was plain to see that it was a horribly misguided notion, perhaps one of the worst cash grabs in cinematic history. Real head-scratcher as to why it was greenlit.

There's that whole unfortunate mode of thought that dictates: "Well, it's a recognizable brand, therefore, people will see this because it's stuff they recognize."

Sadly, when a movie made for $50 million pulls in $234 million, the studio execs will scream "IT WORKED" and keep chugging along that path as soon as they come down from their rampant illicit substance binges.


*Sigh* Yeah.
 
2012-12-12 09:47:31 PM  
A slideshow?

Fark you, Subby.
 
2012-12-12 09:48:20 PM  

Pocket Ninja: At least the farking asshats had the courtesy to list the tags so you didn't have to click through their stupid slideshow. Here, I'll make it so you don't even have to click the link:

THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN,


Classic example of replacing an aging front bender with a new one...and then saying it's a new car.

/And people wonder why I didn't see it and don't buy it.
 
2012-12-12 09:48:37 PM  

DamnYankees: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: I can't speak for everyone, but Channing Tatum taking a break from acting next year is like Daniel Day-Lewis taking a break from acting.

We are all the poorer for it.

I kind of like him, actually.


Buddy of mine works on films, so I asked him who the best and worst stars he'd worked with were. Best, he instantly answered "Kate Beckinsale" (duh!). Worst, he was reluctant to say, but finally blurted out "Channing Tatum".
 
2012-12-12 09:49:06 PM  

born_yesterday: The ads for Bucky Larson were clearly not aimed at my demographic, and I was grateful when I no longer had to endure even them.

I do hope someone was made to suffer for all of that nonsense.



Cripes, those ads were tantamount to the 17th Circle of Hell.

In a just world, the people responsible for them would be bagging ice cubes in Antarctica for my soda.


Apos: *Sigh* Yeah.


I'm only half-joking when I say that you should expect American Midlife Crisis in theaters next summer.
 
2012-12-12 09:49:34 PM  

Hebalo: Buddy of mine works on films, so I asked him who the best and worst stars he'd worked with were. Best, he instantly answered "Kate Beckinsale" (duh!). Worst, he was reluctant to say, but finally blurted out "Channing Tatum".


What do you mean by best and worst? Like, she's nice and he's an asshole?
 
2012-12-12 09:51:00 PM  

Mister Toast: A slideshow?

Fark you, Subby.


Not subby, but there IS a "View Single Page" option.


Hebalo: Buddy of mine works on films, so I asked him who the best and worst stars he'd worked with were. Best, he instantly answered "Kate Beckinsale" (duh!). Worst, he was reluctant to say, but finally blurted out "Channing Tatum".


! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

I can only wonder why that is.

"Stop dancing, Mr. Tatum, we're ready to roll. Mr. Tatum? DAMN IT, CHANNING, STOP POPPING AND LOCKING, WE HAVE A FILM TO MAKE!"
 
2012-12-12 09:51:25 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: js34603: I have not seen a single one of those movies. And I like bad movies.

To my understanding, That's My Boy isn't a movie you see.

It's a movie you endure.

And as someone who loves bad movies (and caught only a fraction of Bucky Larson before fighting the urge to call Netflix and tearfully ask why they make that available to the masses), I will not go anywhere near it.


I'll be honest, I'm an Adam Sandler fan because he's said repeatedly that his Happy Madison production team exists solely so he and his friends can make movies, however bad they may be. So I'll watch his films with a sympathetic bent.

That's My Boy can't even be watched with that sympathy. It's so poorly put together, acted, produced, directed and scripted that it can only be taken as a massive "fark you" to anyone who watches it. It's like Sandler is daring his three remaining fans to ditch him.

Well, now he has two.
 
2012-12-12 09:53:06 PM  

Hebalo: DamnYankees: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: I can't speak for everyone, but Channing Tatum taking a break from acting next year is like Daniel Day-Lewis taking a break from acting.

We are all the poorer for it.

I kind of like him, actually.

Buddy of mine works on films, so I asked him who the best and worst stars he'd worked with were. Best, he instantly answered "Kate Beckinsale" (duh!). Worst, he was reluctant to say, but finally blurted out "Channing Tatum".


OK folks, we have a possible way to get our hands on some sort of item Kate Beckinsale has touched, drank out or (dear God please) worn. The hat passing starts now.
 
2012-12-12 09:53:26 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: The Amazing Spider-Man wasn't *that* bad.


No, it wasn't; except for the fact that it was "Spider-Man" (minus) MJ and Norman Osborn/Green Goblin (plus) Gwen Stacy and Curt Connors/The Lizard and a couple of changes to make it seem like a new movie. You might as well have seen "Spider-Man" again and saved yourself the money.
 
2012-12-12 09:54:25 PM  

Hebalo: Buddy of mine works on films, so I asked him who the best and worst stars he'd worked with were. Best, he instantly answered "Kate Beckinsale" (duh!). Worst, he was reluctant to say, but finally blurted out "Channing Tatum".


I listened to a podcast with the director of 21 Jump Street and he said it was Tatum's idea to puke on Jonah Hill after he shot the guy. Since it was a long steady cam shot, he had to carry fake vomit in his mouth for the whole scene.

I can't believe someone who would be willing to do that could be hard to work with.
 
2012-12-12 09:55:35 PM  
This person doesn't know what bad films are. Those of us who have watched Uwe Boll films know what constitutes a bad film.
 
2012-12-12 09:55:41 PM  

Apos: DNRTFA but Cloud Atlas, Killing Me Softly and Playing For Keeps should be on the list.


Saw Cloud Atlas last weekend and had a very "meh" reaction. A friend was interested and dragged me along. I ended up cramming to finish the book the night before in case it was better -- which it wasn't.

Some interesting ideas in it, but not very well presented.
 
2012-12-12 09:56:06 PM  
I'll admit it. I enjoyed The Campaign. I have a soft spot for any movie that obviously uses the Back to the Future set.
 
2012-12-12 09:56:16 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: AIN'T NOBODY GOT TIME FOR THAT


i.qkme.me
 
2012-12-12 09:57:23 PM  

Apos: Pocket Ninja: At least the farking asshats had the courtesy to list the tags so you didn't have to click through their stupid slideshow. Here, I'll make it so you don't even have to click the link:

ABRAHAM LINCOLN VAMPIRE HUNTER,
ADAM SANDLER,
ALEX CROSS,
AMERICAN REUNION,
BATTLESHIP,
HAPPY MADISON,
HERE COMES THE BOOM,
JOYFUL NOISE,
MIRROR MIRROR,
NATURE CALLS,
PLAYING FOR KEEPS,
RED DAWN,
ROCK OF AGES,
SNOW WHITE AND THE HUNTSMAN,
THAT'S MY BOY,
THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN,
THE BOURNE LEGACY,
THE THREE STOOGES,
THE VOW,

#1 was another absurdly hilarious Bekmambetov offering and does NOT belong with the rest of the swill.

Yes, I said it.


That's the only movie on the list I've seen, and it wasn't much better than sucking on the fetid anus of a diseased goat.

About as enjoyable as the second half of Avengers...
 
2012-12-12 09:58:50 PM  

Rwa2play: No, it wasn't; except for the fact that it was "Spider-Man" (minus) MJ and Norman Osborn/Green Goblin (plus) Gwen Stacy and Curt Connors/The Lizard and a couple of changes to make it seem like a new movie. You might as well have seen "Spider-Man" again and saved yourself the money.


Fair enough.

Still, Denis Leary. I shan't complain there.


Gergesa: This person doesn't know what bad films are. Those of us who have watched Uwe Boll films know what constitutes a bad film.


If Uwe Boll made comedies, he'd in charge of the Happy Madison camp.


Lsherm: I'll be honest, I'm an Adam Sandler fan because he's said repeatedly that his Happy Madison production team exists solely so he and his friends can make movies, however bad they may be. So I'll watch his films with a sympathetic bent.


Understandable.


Lsherm: That's My Boy can't even be watched with that sympathy. It's so poorly put together, acted, produced, directed and scripted that it can only be taken as a massive "fark you" to anyone who watches it. It's like Sandler is daring his three remaining fans to ditch him.

Well, now he has two.


However bad or derivative the film might have been, I had a good time watching Click with friends.

To think that he would have burned off the goodwill he earned with Click, well...

... damn, I'm writing all sorts of movie-related sentences that I'd never imagine writing this evening.
 
2012-12-12 09:59:02 PM  

Lsherm: I can attest that "That's My Boy" was the worst movie of 2012, and might be the worst movie ever made.


jack and jill is worse than "that's my boy" might it only be for Tony Orlando and Rex Ryan lol
 
2012-12-12 09:59:26 PM  

fusillade762: i.qkme.me


YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO TRUST HIM
 
2012-12-12 10:00:12 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Rwa2play: No, it wasn't; except for the fact that it was "Spider-Man" (minus) MJ and Norman Osborn/Green Goblin (plus) Gwen Stacy and Curt Connors/The Lizard and a couple of changes to make it seem like a new movie. You might as well have seen "Spider-Man" again and saved yourself the money.

Fair enough.

Still, Denis Leary. I shan't complain there.


True that; still, I have a feeling Sony's gonna screw the pooch with the second movie. Just like they did with "Spider-Man 3".
 
2012-12-12 10:02:16 PM  
Has it been long enough to point out Prometheus and The Dark Knight Rises both sucked major donkey balls? I don't want to get flamed by every 17 year-old fanboy here, but I think we are far enough away from those movies to say that now.
 
2012-12-12 10:03:27 PM  

Rwa2play: True that; still, I have a feeling Sony's gonna screw the pooch with the second movie. Just like they did with "Spider-Man 3".


I dunno... the setup for the next one is interesting enough.

I'm not mercilessly defending these movies, mind you. I'm merely reserving judgment.
 
2012-12-12 10:03:49 PM  
Really loved Cloud Atlas, fark all y'all.
 
2012-12-12 10:04:05 PM  
Hell I've BEEN in worse movies than that.  My "work" in   Human Trainwreck Feebly Dances To Vegas Fark Party Kareoke Before Bursting Into Flames comes to mind.
 
2012-12-12 10:04:05 PM  

Old Man Winter: Has it been long enough to point out Prometheus and The Dark Knight Rises both sucked major donkey balls? I don't want to get flamed by every 17 year-old fanboy here, but I think we are far enough away from those movies to say that now.


"TDKR" had an excuse: it had to follow "TDK" which was an awesome farking movie.
 
2012-12-12 10:04:35 PM  

Old Man Winter: Has it been long enough to point out Prometheus and The Dark Knight Rises both sucked major donkey balls? I don't want to get flamed by every 17 year-old fanboy here, but I think we are far enough away from those movies to say that now.


still haven't watched dark knight yet but Prometheus was just overhyped. It wasn't terrible. It just wasn't good.
 
2012-12-12 10:04:37 PM  

Old Man Winter: Has it been long enough to point out Prometheus and The Dark Knight Rises both sucked major donkey balls? I don't want to get flamed by every 17 year-old fanboy here, but I think we are far enough away from those movies to say that now.


You're so hip.
 
2012-12-12 10:05:39 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener:
I'm only half-joking when I say that you should expect American Midlife Crisis in theaters next summer.


*Closes eyes* What a nauseating prospect.


Seth'n'Spectrum: Apos: DNRTFA but Cloud Atlas, Killing Me Softly and Playing For Keeps should be on the list.

Saw Cloud Atlas last weekend and had a very "meh" reaction. A friend was interested and dragged me along. I ended up cramming to finish the book the night before in case it was better -- which it wasn't.

Some interesting ideas in it, but not very well presented.


Precisely. Silly of us to have expected a cogent narrative from the duo responsible for The Matrix Revolutions, eh?
 
2012-12-12 10:05:58 PM  

Lsherm: I can attest that "That's My Boy" was the worst movie of 2012, and might be the worst movie ever made.


Nope.

The honor of "Worst Movie Ever Made" is, has been, and will forever be...

Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events.

That is all.
 
2012-12-12 10:06:16 PM  

Old Man Winter: Has it been long enough to point out Prometheus and The Dark Knight Rises both sucked major donkey balls? I don't want to get flamed by every 17 year-old fanboy here, but I think we are far enough away from those movies to say that now.


While I appreciate how incredibly dedicated you are to making everyone aware of how you go against the grain, Prometheus was the biggest disappointment of the year, indeed.
 
2012-12-12 10:07:11 PM  

robsul82: Old Man Winter: Has it been long enough to point out Prometheus and The Dark Knight Rises both sucked major donkey balls? I don't want to get flamed by every 17 year-old fanboy here, but I think we are far enough away from those movies to say that now.

While I appreciate how incredibly dedicated you are to making everyone aware of how you go against the grain, Prometheus was the biggest disappointment of the year, indeed.


And it was still a beautiful, well acted movie with some very interesting ideas. That it was so disappointing and yet pretty decent is just a testament to how insanely high the potential was.
 
2012-12-12 10:07:33 PM  

robsul82: Old Man Winter: Has it been long enough to point out Prometheus and The Dark Knight Rises both sucked major donkey balls? I don't want to get flamed by every 17 year-old fanboy here, but I think we are far enough away from those movies to say that now.

While I appreciate how incredibly dedicated you are to making everyone aware of how you go against the grain, Prometheus was the biggest disappointment of the year, indeed.


Sadly, you are correct.
 
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