If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Gizmodo)   NORAD says Best Korea's new satellite is spinning out of control. Mariana Trench put on alert   (gizmodo.com) divider line 251
    More: Followup, NORAD, North Koreans, yellow sea, intercontinental ballistic missiles  
•       •       •

15497 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Dec 2012 at 8:25 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



251 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2012-12-12 05:46:51 PM
Best GIF of 2012... right there.
 
2012-12-12 06:04:11 PM
Came here to say what he said. Best Gif 2012.
 
2012-12-12 06:09:59 PM
THEY MEANT TO DO THAT!
 
2012-12-12 06:12:25 PM

luniz5monody: Came here to say what he said. Best Gif 2012.


I'm tempted to agree, but there could have been a bit more spinning to really put it over the top.
 
2012-12-12 06:34:43 PM

luniz5monody: Came here to say what he said. Best Gif 2012.


I withdraw my unwavering support of this gif. I've just been to the Carmen Electra link. The jury is out.
 
2012-12-12 06:35:23 PM

unyon: luniz5monody: Came here to say what he said. Best Gif 2012.

I withdraw my unwavering support of this gif. I've just been to the Carmen Electra link. The jury is out.


Gaah. Here's the link
 
2012-12-12 06:56:08 PM

unyon: luniz5monody: Came here to say what he said. Best Gif 2012.

I withdraw my unwavering support of this gif. I've just been to the Carmen Electra link. The jury is out.


Can't like her. Went to school with her in Cincy.
 
2012-12-12 08:29:05 PM
P.S. Quit launching over Japan, or face the destruction of every item you float ever. Word.
 
2012-12-12 08:30:07 PM
www.brookings.edu
 
2012-12-12 08:32:13 PM
A link from a real news page versus bitter no talent children
 
2012-12-12 08:32:54 PM
Time to get the Planetes crew up and running...
 
2012-12-12 08:33:18 PM
I submitted it because of the gif lol
 
2012-12-12 08:33:50 PM
Is NORAD sure that's not just Santa Claus?
 
2012-12-12 08:33:56 PM

gingerjet: A link from a real news page versus bitter no talent children

To diss

 
2012-12-12 08:34:41 PM
North Korea had better hope to hell that that ISN'T a nuclear warhead, and if so, that it doesn't hit something and go blooey. If it even so much as falls in a random spot in the Mauritanian desert, if it detonates, Kim's ass will be joining it in Mauritania for all the Western missiles blowing it there.
 
2012-12-12 08:34:42 PM
I guess the new Red Dawn isn't so silly now after all, is it?
 
2012-12-12 08:35:04 PM

Indubitably: P.S. Quit launching over Japan, or face the destruction of every item you float ever. Word.


The Japanese can't even detect the launch. They rely on the American forces in the area to notify the Japanese that something is going on.

The missile took 10 minutes to fly from Best Korea to the Philippines. If they wanted to, the North Koreans could hit Tokyo before anyone had time to react.
 
2012-12-12 08:36:06 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: Indubitably: P.S. Quit launching over Japan, or face the destruction of every item you float ever. Word.

The Japanese can't even detect the launch. They rely on the American forces in the area to notify the Japanese that something is going on.

The missile took 10 minutes to fly from Best Korea to the Philippines. If they wanted to, the North Koreans could hit Tokyo before anyone had time to react.


NSS?
 
2012-12-12 08:36:26 PM
They must be using Apple maps.
 
2012-12-12 08:37:15 PM
Can't somebody just capture the thing with a net and send it back crashing down to Best Korea? Blowing it up in space wouldn't be a good idea because the fragments might hit friendly space things.
 
2012-12-12 08:37:48 PM
It's a big boy!
 
2012-12-12 08:38:17 PM
How 'bout this: in a gesture of goodwill, the ISS (is it still functional? not a newsie) retrieves, relaunches in a stable attitude so Best K has weather monitoring capability.

/After a little tweaking, of course.
 
2012-12-12 08:38:32 PM

GreenSun: Can't somebody just capture the thing with a net and send it back crashing down to Best Korea? Blowing it up in space wouldn't be a good idea because the fragments might hit friendly space things.


If we had that technology, we'd be using it on the random space junk already up there. That thing is going to hit whatever it's going to hit.
 
2012-12-12 08:40:18 PM
As I was driving home from work tonight I thought "Where is that f*cker going to fall back and how soon?"

Then I was reminded of the scene in "Dogs In Space" (obscure, don't try) where they try to fake pieces of Skylab to get some money. So if the Best Korean Space Shiat (TM) falls in my yard, do I get rich?
 
2012-12-12 08:41:24 PM
 
2012-12-12 08:42:23 PM

gingerjet: A link from a real news page versus bitter no talent children


They need a better gif generator
 
2012-12-12 08:42:41 PM

crabsno termites: How 'bout this: in a gesture of goodwill, the ISS (is it still functional? not a newsie) retrieves, relaunches in a stable attitude so Best K has weather monitoring capability.

/After a little tweaking, of course.


At the speeds things are going in orbit, you could damn near liquify the ISS hulls with a single random stray screw. That's all it takes. It's all they can do to get the important stuff out of the way when a piece of junk they know the trajectory of is coming near. A randomly-flailing whatzahoozit from North Korea is sooner or later going to slam into something important that doesn't know which way to dodge, probably sooner.
 
2012-12-12 08:43:37 PM
www.millionaireplayboy.com

Lex Luthor Unavailable for comment

//Will stay in Otisburg
 
2012-12-12 08:44:32 PM
In unrelated news, the US Air Force just launched another X-37B test vehicle.
 
2012-12-12 08:44:50 PM
1. ????????
2. Blow up stuff
3. Profit
 
2012-12-12 08:46:05 PM

crazytrain: In unrelated news, the US Air Force just launched another X-37B test vehicle.


Grab it.

*)
 
2012-12-12 08:46:49 PM

Indubitably: crazytrain: In unrelated news, the US Air Force just launched another X-37B test vehicle.

Grab it.

*)


P.S. To ribbit, as in a frog vocalizing...
 
2012-12-12 08:47:31 PM

GanjSmokr: Track it


Heavens Above also has an entry for it.

1 39026U 12072A 12347.60979993 .00129551 00000-0 79618-2 0 55
2 39026 097.4072 036.5330 0064702 173.0179 187.1881 15.07721442 94

Epoch (UTC): 12 December 2012 14:38:06
Eccentricity: 0.0064702
inclination: 97.4072°
perigee height: 498 km
apogee height: 588 km
right ascension of ascending node: 36.5330°
argument of perigee: 173.0179°
revolutions per day: 15.07721442
mean anomaly at epoch: 187.1881°
orbit number at epoch: 9

Even if it is "spinning out of control" it seems to be in a decent orbit. For comparison the ISS is currently orbiting between:
perigee height: 399 km
apogee height: 422 km
 
2012-12-12 08:47:37 PM
North Koreans build dirty bomb, make it resemble a satellite. Launch it into orbit, where it "spins out of control" until it finally comes down in a fine mist over some US suburban area.

PROFIT.

Best thing: the world knows they suck at this stuff. So have plausible deniability.
 
2012-12-12 08:48:01 PM
+2 Kudos for the hilarious header graphic.
-257 Kudos for using a 2,080kb 300 frame .gif. This is 2012.
 
2012-12-12 08:48:29 PM
...To the surprise of absolutely no one.
 
2012-12-12 08:48:36 PM
Wouldn't it be hilarious if it fell right back on top of them?
 
2012-12-12 08:53:22 PM
anyone notice the altitude on the tracker is dropping
 
2012-12-12 08:53:34 PM

Indubitably: Indubitably: crazytrain: In unrelated news, the US Air Force just launched another X-37B test vehicle.

Grab it.

*)

P.S. To ribbit, as in a frog vocalizing...


*whoosh* hey, must be a draft in here.
 
2012-12-12 08:54:17 PM
oi47.tinypic.com
 
2012-12-12 08:55:04 PM

crazytrain: Indubitably: Indubitably: crazytrain: In unrelated news, the US Air Force just launched another X-37B test vehicle.

Grab it.

*)

P.S. To ribbit, as in a frog vocalizing...

*whoosh* hey, must be a draft in here.

To vocalize

 
2012-12-12 08:55:29 PM
It's over Best Carolina right now.
 
2012-12-12 08:55:47 PM

lifeboat: [oi47.tinypic.com image 640x516]


Blueberry, hopefully.
 
2012-12-12 08:57:50 PM

ItchyMcDoogle: [www.millionaireplayboy.com image 400x250]

Lex Luthor Unavailable for comment

//Will stay in Otisburg


I would gladly have spent some time in Teschmacher Peaks.
 
2012-12-12 08:58:35 PM

dopirt: It's over Best Carolina right now.


Now it's in Canada. I had no idea they moved so damned fast. I guess I just never really though about it.
 
2012-12-12 08:59:28 PM
The altitude is one thing- if Angry Birds Space has taught me anything, satellite orbits can oval a little bit without hitting land. It's a decaying speed that's going to worry me a lot. We're at 7.65 right now; no idea what it's 7.65 of, but there you go.
 
2012-12-12 08:59:44 PM

dopirt: It's over Best Carolina right now.


LOL. That thing's just cruisin', ain't it? You wouldn't even be able to catch it flying over, it's going so fast.
 
2012-12-12 09:00:26 PM

Ivo Shandor: Heavens Above


Oh god, it's right over my house now.
 
2012-12-12 09:02:25 PM
every day lil boots treachery power grows. instead of just leveling the luxury liner where campbell soup kid & his lackeys hang five and eliminating a threat just let the farker get more dangerous with each passing year. more fun that way, scare the mericanos. its easier to put out a fire thats still small, call me kookie. take out the garbage, clean up the mess, give Best Korea to China, wipe out honorable debt.
 
2012-12-12 09:02:51 PM

JonnyG: dopirt: It's over Best Carolina right now.

LOL. That thing's just cruisin', ain't it? You wouldn't even be able to catch it flying over, it's going so fast.


Apparently, it's traveling at just over 17,000 mph. I wonder if this is normal for satellites?
 
2012-12-12 09:03:13 PM

Gosling: The altitude is one thing- if Angry Birds Space has taught me anything, satellite orbits can oval a little bit without hitting land. It's a decaying speed that's going to worry me a lot. We're at 7.65 right now; no idea what it's 7.65 of, but there you go.

To number


Maths are hard.
 
2012-12-12 09:03:18 PM
North Korea's launch center looks like a rejected set from a 60s bond movie. You just have to know Kim Wong Biggun saw a Bond movie and told his space guys "I want it to look like that, and no, I don't care what purpose or function it may serve if any, but that's how it must look."

north korean space agency
 
2012-12-12 09:03:20 PM

Shadow Blasko: Best GIF of 2012... right there.


So...new Smash TV?
 
2012-12-12 09:03:56 PM
To satellite
 
2012-12-12 09:05:58 PM
People make jokes about this, but North Korea is getting more and more successful all the time. This is going to be some serious shiat some years down the road.
 
2012-12-12 09:06:24 PM
www.localphilosophy.com
 
2012-12-12 09:07:47 PM
BTW one worrisome thing is that it's on a polar orbit. Meaning it's orbiting over the poles, whereas most stuff orbits going from west to east. A tumbling satellite moving the same direction as everything else, would be bad, but at least it would be moving the same direction. This is flying on an orbit that transects usual orbits. So anyone with a satellite that is at the right, or wrong if you prefer, height is now running lots of numbers hoping the Korean satellite doesn't end up on collision course with their satellite. What's more if the tumbling is causing an exaggerated orbit, that could well get worse which makes all those calculations even more fun.
 
2012-12-12 09:09:03 PM
uncoolghoul.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-12-12 09:11:28 PM
 
2012-12-12 09:11:32 PM

Thosw: ItchyMcDoogle: [www.millionaireplayboy.com image 400x250]

Lex Luthor Unavailable for comment

//Will stay in Otisburg

I would gladly have spent some time in Teschmacher Peaks.


Ive seen the movie a million times and thats the first time I caught that. Valerie Perrine was the hawt back int he 70's

t2.gstatic.com
 
2012-12-12 09:12:38 PM
Yesterday, NASA published a composite photo of the world at night. At least I hope it was a composite. If not they have connections that I don't even want to think about. But I digress.

The photo showed nighttime lights throughout the world. A comparison can be drawn by the density of nighttime lights and industrialization/civilization. North Korea, especially in comparison with South Korea, is black. No lights, no electricity, no modern infrastructure. Except for a small spot at their capitol. How do they successfully build and launch a 3 stage missile? Not saying that its BS, but just hard to believe. They are at a starting iron age civilization.
 
2012-12-12 09:15:10 PM
Oh, great. Now they wake up the Elder Gods, and all the Mayan Calender kooks get to say "Told you so!"
 
2012-12-12 09:15:12 PM
 
2012-12-12 09:15:55 PM

oldcrow95: anyone notice the altitude on the tracker is dropping


That's just because it's in an elliptical orbit. Once it passes perigee the number will go up again.

JonnyG: Apparently, it's traveling at just over 17,000 mph. I wonder if this is normal for satellites?


Yes it is.
 
2012-12-12 09:16:23 PM
 
2012-12-12 09:16:35 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2012-12-12 09:17:43 PM
smells_like_meat, it's because instead of spending money on infrastructure, they're spending it on things like this. And the military. And a posh lifestyle for dear leader and the generals. Making sure your people have decent infrastructure and a livable civilization is just frivolous spending to them.
 
2012-12-12 09:18:21 PM
Disco ball for ISS
 
2012-12-12 09:18:56 PM
I hope it slams into something Chinese up there, maybe they'll think twice about protecting him from security council sanction after that.
 
2012-12-12 09:20:51 PM

smells_like_meat: The photo showed nighttime lights throughout the world. A comparison can be drawn by the density of nighttime lights and industrialization/civilization. North Korea, especially in comparison with South Korea, is black. No lights, no electricity, no modern infrastructure. Except for a small spot at their capitol. How do they successfully build and launch a 3 stage missile? Not saying that its BS, but just hard to believe. They are at a starting iron age civilization.


They have the technology to wire up North Korea. They just don't have the funds or the inclination.

North Korea isn't some country that is just inconvenienced by poverty. It is a country ruled by a select few who like keeping the lights off everywhere but in their houses. They saw what happened in China and Russia when you okayed reforms to allow people an easier life with more of a voice. They prefer to be more wildly powerful than anyone.

Think about it. If you were an asshole and you ran your own country where you could literally make anyone do anything you wanted them to do... would you care if they had lights at night? Hell no.

The NK leadership is happy with their early 20th century lifestyle ergo NK is happy with it.
 
2012-12-12 09:21:23 PM

jimpoz: Is NORAD sure that's not just Santa Claus?


As long as NORAD's Santa Tracker doesn't crash, I will sleep easy tonight.
 
2012-12-12 09:21:43 PM
Mongolia.

There is no song I could find called 'Mongolia'. So please enjoy Mongolians doing Gangnam Style.
 
2012-12-12 09:21:55 PM
Hi Best Korea, that fancy new satellite is nice and all but unfortunately it is "spinning out of control" so we are going to have to destroy it.

Love
America
 
2012-12-12 09:22:15 PM

JonnyG: Apparently, it's traveling at just over 17,000 mph. I wonder if this is normal for satellites?


Yep, usual speed for something in low earth orbit is between 17,000 and 18,000 mph. And as for catching it while it flew over head, well it's too small but if you're away from manmade light, like out in the country, and it's the right time of night and all, you can easily see the ISS go over head.
 
2012-12-12 09:22:42 PM
The bad thing about this polar orbit is that it crosses all sorts of paths AND it can fall anywhere.

Would it crashing into other satellites be sufficient reason to finally change the regime? I think we could coordinate with the Chinese Army and really turn a page in international relations.
 
2012-12-12 09:26:06 PM

Faddy: Hi Best Korea, that fancy new satellite is nice and all but unfortunately it is "spinning out of control" so we are going to have to destroy it.

Love
America


I'm thinking the "spinning out of control" press release will be followed by the press release announcing that it has "crashed" into some other space junk and been destroyed. Oops. Bad luck, that, Best Korea.

Yeah, that's the ticket.

/walks away whistling
 
2012-12-12 09:26:21 PM
 
2012-12-12 09:26:29 PM

crazytrain: North Korea's launch center looks like a rejected set from a 60s bond movie. You just have to know Kim Wong Biggun saw a Bond movie and told his space guys "I want it to look like that, and no, I don't care what purpose or function it may serve if any, but that's how it must look."

north korean space agency


I was looking at the pictures and why is there a picture of Robocop on a white horse ?
 
2012-12-12 09:28:43 PM
Fugger is dropping by about 2.5 mi / min.
 
2012-12-12 09:28:53 PM
To wit: Oldest universe was reiterated today. Word. *) P.S. Language/text is universal, yo.
 
2012-12-12 09:29:02 PM
 
2012-12-12 09:30:10 PM

BATMANATEE: Fugger is dropping by about 2.5 mi / min.


Yeah, says the 'perigee'- the lowest it's supposed to go- is 505.6. It's at 500.80 now.
 
2012-12-12 09:30:47 PM
And the arrow just started going up. Phew.
 
2012-12-12 09:31:40 PM

azpenguin: smells_like_meat, it's because instead of spending money on infrastructure, they're spending it on things like this. And the military. And a posh lifestyle for dear leader and the generals. Making sure your people have decent infrastructure and a livable civilization is just frivolous spending to them.


With the right leadership and system of government, they could be just as successful as Japan or any of the Asian Tigers. It's a great injustice those people are suffering when they have that kind of potential.
 
2012-12-12 09:32:02 PM
 
2012-12-12 09:33:20 PM

Gosling: North Korea had better hope to hell that that ISN'T a nuclear warhead, and if so, that it doesn't hit something and go blooey. If it even so much as falls in a random spot in the Mauritanian desert, if it detonates, Kim's ass will be joining it in Mauritania for all the Western missiles blowing it there.


At this rate, it's not likely to hit anything on Earth. The bigger danger is that it will hit Alpha Centauri and spark some kind of interplanetary war.
 
2012-12-12 09:33:54 PM
Seems to be leveling out for now. Is 312 mi normal for a satellite?
 
2012-12-12 09:34:00 PM
Claire couldn't care less.
 
2012-12-12 09:34:09 PM

Gyrfalcon: Gosling: North Korea had better hope to hell that that ISN'T a nuclear warhead, and if so, that it doesn't hit something and go blooey. If it even so much as falls in a random spot in the Mauritanian desert, if it detonates, Kim's ass will be joining it in Mauritania for all the Western missiles blowing it there.

At this rate, it's not likely to hit anything on Earth. The bigger danger is that it will hit Alpha Centauri and spark some kind of interplanetary war.


Too late.
 
2012-12-12 09:35:42 PM

Gosling: And the arrow just started going up. Phew.


It hit perigee, the lowest point in the orbit. Now it's headed for apogee, the highest point, then it'll be down to perigee. Part of orbital mechanics is the high and low points of an orbit. And if you notice the perigee and apogee changing orbit after orbit? Your orbit is bad and your satellite is about to feel bad.
 
2012-12-12 09:35:54 PM
 
2012-12-12 09:36:32 PM

WhyteRaven74: Gosling: And the arrow just started going up. Phew.

It hit perigee, the lowest point in the orbit. Now it's headed for apogee, the highest point, then it'll be down to perigee. Part of orbital mechanics is the high and low points of an orbit. And if you notice the perigee and apogee changing orbit after orbit? Your orbit is bad and your satellite is about to feel bad.


Too bad?
 
2012-12-12 09:38:31 PM

WhyteRaven74: JonnyG: Apparently, it's traveling at just over 17,000 mph. I wonder if this is normal for satellites?

Yep, usual speed for something in low earth orbit is between 17,000 and 18,000 mph. And as for catching it while it flew over head, well it's too small but if you're away from manmade light, like out in the country, and it's the right time of night and all, you can easily see the ISS go over head.


ISS went over my town tonight at about 6:20pm. I dragged the whole family out to watch it. It was visible (VERY visible, magnitude of -.5, similar to Venus) for a couple minutes until it passed into the earth's shadow and faded to nothing. ISS orbits the earth every 90 minutes or so. The Korean POS is a little higher and much more elliptical, so it would appear to me moving slower if you were watching for it. It takes maybe 100 minutes to orbit. It is polar while the ISS isn't quite.
 
2012-12-12 09:38:51 PM
encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com

It is simply dancing with the love for the Great Leader.
 
2012-12-12 09:39:03 PM

WhyteRaven74: Gosling: And the arrow just started going up. Phew.

It hit perigee, the lowest point in the orbit. Now it's headed for apogee, the highest point, then it'll be down to perigee. Part of orbital mechanics is the high and low points of an orbit. And if you notice the perigee and apogee changing orbit after orbit? Your orbit is bad and your satellite is about to feel bad.


About how much flux in apogee and perigee would one be comfortable with before one got worried? Using the 505.6/588.3 numbers quoted here. How far could you get away from those before you need to duck and cover?
 
2012-12-12 09:40:14 PM
Somebody needs to take this guy to Las Vegas and chill the fark out.
 
2012-12-12 09:40:18 PM

Gosling: WhyteRaven74: Gosling: And the arrow just started going up. Phew.

It hit perigee, the lowest point in the orbit. Now it's headed for apogee, the highest point, then it'll be down to perigee. Part of orbital mechanics is the high and low points of an orbit. And if you notice the perigee and apogee changing orbit after orbit? Your orbit is bad and your satellite is about to feel bad.

About how much flux in apogee and perigee would one be comfortable with before one got worried? Using the 505.6/588.3 numbers quoted here. How far could you get away from those before you need to duck and cover?

To calculus

 
2012-12-12 09:41:48 PM
crazytrain: In unrelated news, the US Air Force just launched another X-37B test vehicle.


----------

You noticed that too? LOL.

I wonder how NK will spin this story?

/sorry, low hanging fruit and all
 
2012-12-12 09:41:51 PM

BATMANATEE: Seems to be leveling out for now. Is 312 mi normal for a satellite?


Yep, that's well within the normal range for low earth orbit.
 
2012-12-12 09:42:58 PM
The North Korean satellite is not exhibiting very much Juche. Purge it!
 
2012-12-12 09:43:12 PM

Faddy: Hi Best Korea, that fancy new satellite is nice and all but unfortunately it is "spinning out of control" so we are going to have to destroy it.

Love
America


It's like a train wreck. It parodies a popular style with a historical group of nomads who dominated much of their entire world

/brain...cannot...process
 
2012-12-12 09:45:28 PM

Gosling: North Korea had better hope to hell that that ISN'T a nuclear warhead, and if so, that it doesn't hit something and go blooey. If it even so much as falls in a random spot in the Mauritanian desert, if it detonates, Kim's ass will be joining it in Mauritania for all the Western missiles blowing it there.


Omg look what it did to mauritania!

www.justmegawatt.com
 
2012-12-12 09:46:59 PM

BravadoGT: North Koreans build dirty bomb, make it resemble a satellite. Launch it into orbit, where it "spins out of control" until it finally comes down in a fine mist over some US suburban area.

PROFIT.

Best thing: the world knows they suck at this stuff. So have plausible deniability.


Except there is no reason whatsoever that an orbital satellite would need the required nuclear materials to make a dirty bomb. Sure, you can make a case for a nuclear power core for long range exploration vehicles, like the Mars rovers, but not for a weather satellite. If that scenario actually happened, they'd be dust by day's end.
 
2012-12-12 09:47:53 PM

BATMANATEE: Seems to be leveling out for now. Is 312 mi normal for a satellite?


That's not an especially low orbit. The Apollo missions used a circular Earth parking orbit of around 100 miles in preparation for the engine burn to the moon.
 
2012-12-12 09:49:46 PM

WhyteRaven74: BATMANATEE: Seems to be leveling out for now. Is 312 mi normal for a satellite?

Yep, that's well within the normal range for low earth orbit.


Yay! 'cause it's it's going to come close to me and loved ones again if it doesn't hit something else in orbit first.
 
2012-12-12 09:52:55 PM
 
2012-12-12 09:54:30 PM

madgonad: The Korean POS is a little higher and much more elliptical, so it would appear to me moving slower if you were watching for it. It takes maybe 100 minutes to orbit.


Yep all that.

Gosling: Using the 505.6/588.3 numbers quoted here. How far could you get away from those before you need to duck and cover?


It's a bit variable as to how much difference you can have before you start going "Does my home insurance cover falling space debris?". Depends on the specifics of the orbit, you can have a pretty sizable difference on certain orbits and it's nothing to worry about. But a difference of 73 kiliometers is well within in the norms for satellite.
 
2012-12-12 09:55:47 PM

WhyteRaven74: It's a bit variable as to how much difference you can have before you start going "Does my home insurance cover falling space debris?". Depends on the specifics of the orbit, you can have a pretty sizable difference on certain orbits and it's nothing to worry about. But a difference of 73 kiliometers is well within in the norms for satellite.


No, what I meant is, we're getting somewhat near the apogee then. The perigee came in some 4.8 km below the stated number of 505.6. How much could you stray from 505.6?
 
2012-12-12 09:56:18 PM

SN1987a goes boom: BravadoGT: North Koreans build dirty bomb, make it resemble a satellite. Launch it into orbit, where it "spins out of control" until it finally comes down in a fine mist over some US suburban area.

PROFIT.

Best thing: the world knows they suck at this stuff. So have plausible deniability.

Except there is no reason whatsoever that an orbital satellite would need the required nuclear materials to make a dirty bomb. Sure, you can make a case for a nuclear power core for long range exploration vehicles, like the Mars rovers, but not for a weather satellite. If that scenario actually happened, they'd be dust by day's end.


Why not? They're CRAZY. Sure, there's no practical reason for the satellite to have a nuclear core, but there's no practical reason for much of the things they do. Their leadership is mentally ill.
 
2012-12-12 09:56:34 PM
soooo...

1) shoot nuclear bombs into orbit
2) have them spin out of control, crashing into random things in orbit or back to earth
3) nuclear bomb falling anywhere
4) ????
5) Profit!
 
2012-12-12 09:57:21 PM

BATMANATEE: Yay! 'cause it's it's going to come close to me and loved ones again if it doesn't hit something else in orbit first.


Well if you're worried about it hitting you, then keep track of where it is when it's between half and a third of the world away from you. If starts plummeting while over head? Not going to be a problem for you.
 
2012-12-12 09:59:10 PM
It's going to go over Texas, get your guns out quick!!!
 
2012-12-12 10:00:41 PM

BravadoGT: SN1987a goes boom: BravadoGT: North Koreans build dirty bomb, make it resemble a satellite. Launch it into orbit, where it "spins out of control" until it finally comes down in a fine mist over some US suburban area.

PROFIT.

Best thing: the world knows they suck at this stuff. So have plausible deniability.

Except there is no reason whatsoever that an orbital satellite would need the required nuclear materials to make a dirty bomb. Sure, you can make a case for a nuclear power core for long range exploration vehicles, like the Mars rovers, but not for a weather satellite. If that scenario actually happened, they'd be dust by day's end.

Why not? They're CRAZY. Sure, there's no practical reason for the satellite to have a nuclear core, but there's no practical reason for much of the things they do. Their leadership is mentally ill.


No worries, friend, we will grabit, disable it, and return it harmlessly, on a trajectory towards earth, because we are professionals at what we do, and we take pride in being leaders with trajectories.
 
2012-12-12 10:01:19 PM
All these perigees and apogees are making me seasick.
 
2012-12-12 10:01:22 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: Indubitably: P.S. Quit launching over Japan, or face the destruction of every item you float ever. Word.

The Japanese can't even detect the launch. They rely on the American forces in the area to notify the Japanese that something is going on.

The missile took 10 minutes to fly from Best Korea to the Philippines. If they wanted to, the North Koreans could hit Tokyo before anyone had time to react.


Yeah I'm sure they have don't that sort of accuracy. They would be just as likely to hit themselves.
 
2012-12-12 10:02:29 PM
It's spinning out of control. It is a danger to humanity.
We should shoot it out of space.
Win, Win, Win.

Win 1. We get to test our missile defense system.
Win 2. We save humanity
Win 3. We show Best Korea that our dick is bigger.
 
2012-12-12 10:04:31 PM

Gosling: Antarctica.


Good thing they'll know what the weather is in Antarctica now
 
2012-12-12 10:07:20 PM

The Southern Dandy: It's spinning out of control. It is a danger to humanity.
We should shoot it out of space.
Win, Win, Win.

Win 1. We get to test our missile defense system.
Win 2. We save humanity
Win 3. We show Best Korea that our dick is bigger.


Yeah, but we don't really want to blow it up. The key is to avoid debris. So... is there a way to send a giant magnet up there after it, to gently drag it into a stable orbit?

/Hey, if they can send rovers to Mars...
 
2012-12-12 10:07:52 PM

Gosling: How much could you stray from 505.6?


Without actually crunching the numbers, could be off by a little bit, say 10 to 12 kilometers and be ok. Keep in mind the exact numbers depend on the particulars of this satellite's orbit. The real worry is if the perigee and apogee start getting further and further apart. That means the orbit has destabilized. But even a stable orbit will have some level of variation in it, how much is acceptable depends on a few factors.

SlothB77: 3) nuclear bomb falling anywhere


Given it would be a uranium device? Meh. Simply crashing a nuclear device into something won't set it off. Would need a proximity type device to set it off to do anything. And just having a bomb fall without actually going off would do much. Oh a few kilograms of uranium scattered over hundreds or thousands of square miles? Not really an issue. Uranium by itself, assuming it hasn't been used as nuclear fuel, isn't much of a worry.
 
2012-12-12 10:09:27 PM
Perigee came in 4.8 low at 500.79.

Apogee passes the expected number. 588.3 the expected apogee. Actual... is 591.75. 3.45 over expected.
 
2012-12-12 10:09:56 PM

The Southern Dandy: It is a danger to humanity.


Given it has no thermal shielding, it's not much of a danger to humanity, it'll burn up and go to pieces when/if it hits the atmosphere.
 
2012-12-12 10:11:29 PM

Gosling: Apogee passes the expected number. 588.3 the expected apogee. Actual... is 591.75. 3.45 over expected.


Not much to worry about there. Now if those numbers keep going further and further off from expected? We'll have Fark's first ever satellite falling out of space thread. And I may actually start crunching numbers.
 
2012-12-12 10:13:26 PM

Gosling: Perigee came in 4.8 low at 500.79.

Apogee passes the expected number. 588.3 the expected apogee. Actual... is 591.75. 3.45 over expected.


i.imgur.com
 
2012-12-12 10:14:39 PM
Okay, so in summary, then:

PERIGEE (low point):
Expected: 505.6
Last: 500.79
Next: Hopefully over 500.79

APOGEE (high point):
Expected: 588.3
Last: 591.75
Next: Hopefully below 591.75
 
2012-12-12 10:15:40 PM
Win-Win 

Besties have a launch they can call a success..

Staties have a launch "intervention" they can call a success.

What?
 
2012-12-12 10:16:20 PM
You're using the big screen and I'm using the little screen. We might be getting a couple decimal points worth of differential.
 
2012-12-12 10:16:28 PM

Gosling: Next: Hopefully over 500.79


Well I wouldn't put it that, way, more like "Hopefully close to, and then close to on the following orbit and one after that..."
 
2012-12-12 10:16:52 PM

Canton: The Southern Dandy: It's spinning out of control. It is a danger to humanity.
We should shoot it out of space.
Win, Win, Win.

Win 1. We get to test our missile defense system.
Win 2. We save humanity
Win 3. We show Best Korea that our dick is bigger.

Yeah, but we don't really want to blow it up. The key is to avoid debris. So... is there a way to send a giant magnet up there after it, to gently drag it into a stable orbit?

/Hey, if they can send rovers to Mars...


I've wondered about this. Could a giant blob of goo be launched into debris filled areas and then return to burn up in the atmosphere safely?

Like silly putty, you goddamned perverts. Put your pants back on.
 
2012-12-12 10:19:32 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: Could a giant blob of goo be launched into debris filled areas and then return to burn up in the atmosphere safely?


Well as long as the goo didn't also take actual satellites with it...
 
2012-12-12 10:21:12 PM

Canton: The Southern Dandy: It's spinning out of control. It is a danger to humanity.
We should shoot it out of space.
Win, Win, Win.

Win 1. We get to test our missile defense system.
Win 2. We save humanity
Win 3. We show Best Korea that our dick is bigger.

Yeah, but we don't really want to blow it up. The key is to avoid debris. So... is there a way to send a giant magnet up there after it, to gently drag it into a stable orbit?





Not sure yet, Acme says they've got their best technician on the job though....
 
2012-12-12 10:21:41 PM

GanjSmokr: Track it


Holy shiat, it's coming right for us!
 
2012-12-12 10:22:11 PM
 
2012-12-12 10:24:02 PM
Jesus, knowing NK, there is some doomed soul trying to drive this thing and running out of air right now.
 
2012-12-12 10:25:05 PM

WhyteRaven74: AverageAmericanGuy: Could a giant blob of goo be launched into debris filled areas and then return to burn up in the atmosphere safely?

Well as long as the goo didn't also take actual satellites with it...


So it would work... I wonder if Acme sells goo.
 
2012-12-12 10:25:25 PM

WhyteRaven74: AverageAmericanGuy: Could a giant blob of goo be launched into debris filled areas and then return to burn up in the atmosphere safely?

Well as long as the goo didn't also take actual satellites with it...


Still not a bad concept. Not all the debris up there is magnetic, though I assume some of it is. On the other hand, the goo would have to be controlled somehow, which could be problematic.

Magnets, goo, and rocket fuel, working together for the common good?
 
2012-12-12 10:26:40 PM
 
2012-12-12 10:26:55 PM

Canton: WhyteRaven74: AverageAmericanGuy: Could a giant blob of goo be launched into debris filled areas and then return to burn up in the atmosphere safely?

Well as long as the goo didn't also take actual satellites with it...

Still not a bad concept. Not all the debris up there is magnetic, though I assume some of it is. On the other hand, the goo would have to be controlled somehow, which could be problematic.

Magnets, goo, and rocket fuel, working together for the common good?


Or we could just 'bump' it with something, knock it into a controlled fall, and let it hit water\burn in the atmosphere.

/...I like your guys' stuff better, but still...
 
2012-12-12 10:27:08 PM
If it's tumbling, it's very likely bricked. I wonder what happened to it.

505 km x 588 km is a pretty decent orbit. Nicely circular, and above most of the atmospheric drag. It isn't going to re-enter for a long time.
 
2012-12-12 10:27:48 PM

Gosling: You're using the big screen and I'm using the little screen. We might be getting a couple decimal points worth of differential.


Yep, couple of hundredths isn't really relevant. Just though I'd cap that as reference for next time. I'll do the same for perigee if I catch it.
 
2012-12-12 10:28:18 PM

Canton: Magnets, goo, and rocket fuel, working together for the common good?


Actually something with the equivalent of fishing nets could work. I can see it now "Coming on Discovery, Deadliest Catch: Space"
 
2012-12-12 10:28:45 PM

studebaker hoch: 505 km x 588 km is a pretty decent orbit. Nicely circular, and above most of the atmospheric drag. It isn't going to re-enter for a long time.


That's the expected. Our last orbit was actually 500/591.
 
2012-12-12 10:29:40 PM
 
2012-12-12 10:30:11 PM

PsiChick: Canton: WhyteRaven74: AverageAmericanGuy: Could a giant blob of goo be launched into debris filled areas and then return to burn up in the atmosphere safely?

Well as long as the goo didn't also take actual satellites with it...

Still not a bad concept. Not all the debris up there is magnetic, though I assume some of it is. On the other hand, the goo would have to be controlled somehow, which could be problematic.

Magnets, goo, and rocket fuel, working together for the common good?

Or we could just 'bump' it with something, knock it into a controlled fall, and let it hit water\burn in the atmosphere.

/...I like your guys' stuff better, but still...


Acme methods are fun, but yours is probably more feasible. At least in the short term.

/Never claimed to be a rocket scientist.
 
2012-12-12 10:32:11 PM
 
2012-12-12 10:34:11 PM
...wow, the last two songs I've pulled are from Spongebob Squarepants and Jewel.

This is not an inspiring lineup of songs sometimes.
 
2012-12-12 10:35:30 PM
It's not spinning out of control, Great Leader merely put a little Engrish on it when he lofted it into orbit.
 
2012-12-12 10:35:53 PM
Cool, it just passed ~20 miles east of being directly overhead. I would've pointed and laughed but I'm cooking.

/With electricity!
 
2012-12-12 10:36:05 PM
Swift Current.

Or at least current Swift.
 
2012-12-12 10:36:26 PM

Thunderboy: It's not spinning out of control, Great Leader merely put a little Engrish on it when he lofted it into orbit.


*golf clap*
 
2012-12-12 10:37:16 PM

Canton: Acme methods are fun, but yours is probably more feasible. At least in the short term.

/Never claimed to be a rocket scientist.


...I've made the vouch for sanity. Time for ACME.

/They are more fun. :p
 
2012-12-12 10:38:40 PM
From the looks of their Mission Control, we could launch Charlie Sheen to take a piss on their satellite and set it on fire, and they would have no effing idea what happened to it.
 
2012-12-12 10:39:13 PM

Insatiable Jesus: Jesus, knowing NK, there is some doomed soul trying to drive this thing and running out of air right now.


Ha!
 
2012-12-12 10:40:55 PM
Nunavut.

Oh, I am sorry for this one.

/i'm not sorry
 
2012-12-12 10:41:58 PM
Hang on a minute. If the satellite took off over Japan, why is it going from east to west? Seems like a waste of horizontal velocity to me...

/I'm presuming I'm missing something that's obvious to an orbital mechanic...
 
2012-12-12 10:44:39 PM

PsiChick: Canton: Acme methods are fun, but yours is probably more feasible. At least in the short term.

/Never claimed to be a rocket scientist.

...I've made the vouch for sanity. Time for ACME.

/They are more fun. :p


Indeed. ACME: Aerospace Construct and Mission Engineering?
 
2012-12-12 10:46:07 PM

Gyrfalcon: All these perigees and apogees are making me seasick.


I think you mean the kimchee.
 
2012-12-12 10:46:33 PM

SJKebab: Hang on a minute. If the satellite took off over Japan, why is it going from east to west? Seems like a waste of horizontal velocity to me...

/I'm presuming I'm missing something that's obvious to an orbital mechanic...


It was fired southward. It flew over the Ryukyu islands which are almost next to Taiwan.
 
2012-12-12 10:48:54 PM
Back in the USSR.

This is me apologizing for Jewel, the Spongebob squirrel and some CBC douchebags.
 
2012-12-12 10:49:47 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: SJKebab: Hang on a minute. If the satellite took off over Japan, why is it going from east to west? Seems like a waste of horizontal velocity to me...

/I'm presuming I'm missing something that's obvious to an orbital mechanic...

It was fired southward. It flew over the Ryukyu islands which are almost next to Taiwan.


Ahhh thank you.
/I'm presuming I'm missing something that's obvious to an orbital mechanic geography teacher...
//FYFM
 
2012-12-12 10:50:43 PM
AverageAmericanGuy: SJKebab: Hang on a minute. If the satellite took off over Japan, why is it going from east to west? Seems like a waste of horizontal velocity to me...

/I'm presuming I'm missing something that's obvious to an orbital mechanic...

It was fired southward. It flew over the Ryukyu islands which are almost next to Taiwan.



They launched at 88deg and the third stage yawed it over to 97deg in a dogleg - I think they did that so that Best Korea could remain not irradiated and on fire.
 
2012-12-12 10:51:36 PM

Insatiable Jesus: Jesus, knowing NK, there is some doomed soul trying to drive this thing and running out of air right now.


Kamicrazy, but,

yah, funny but they actually could target using a pilot..

at Japan. :(
 
2012-12-12 10:53:02 PM
Weather satellite. So now all the Best Korean citizens can log on to their fiber Internet and see what the current conditions are in Russia, right?
 
2012-12-12 10:53:22 PM

Canton: PsiChick: Canton: Acme methods are fun, but yours is probably more feasible. At least in the short term.

/Never claimed to be a rocket scientist.

...I've made the vouch for sanity. Time for ACME.

/They are more fun. :p

Indeed. ACME: Aerospace Construct and Mission Engineering?


That may well be a possibility.
 
2012-12-12 10:53:24 PM

Gyrfalcon: Gosling: North Korea had better hope to hell that that ISN'T a nuclear warhead, and if so, that it doesn't hit something and go blooey. If it even so much as falls in a random spot in the Mauritanian desert, if it detonates, Kim's ass will be joining it in Mauritania for all the Western missiles blowing it there.

At this rate, it's not likely to hit anything on Earth. The bigger danger is that it will hit Alpha Centauri and spark some kind of interplanetary war.


Considering the orbit...
OUR WORDS ARE BACKED WITH UNCLEAR WEAPONS!
 
2012-12-12 10:54:33 PM

Insatiable Jesus: AverageAmericanGuy: SJKebab: Hang on a minute. If the satellite took off over Japan, why is it going from east to west? Seems like a waste of horizontal velocity to me...

/I'm presuming I'm missing something that's obvious to an orbital mechanic...

It was fired southward. It flew over the Ryukyu islands which are almost next to Taiwan.



They launched at 88deg and the third stage yawed it over to 97deg in a dogleg - I think they did that so that Best Korea could remain not irradiated and on fire.


Speaking of which, it is over Russia now.

Wondering how Russia or China would react if it drops on anything remotely valuable in their lands.

/Putin, would probably catch it, fix it, and throw it back into orbit
//then go back to hunting tigers bare-handed
///Or banging a gymnast bare-back.
 
2012-12-12 10:54:37 PM
Sooner or later things are going to get out of control etc etc.
www.chicagonow.com
is annoyed at Farks lack.
 
2012-12-12 10:57:12 PM

Insatiable Jesus: AverageAmericanGuy: SJKebab: Hang on a minute. If the satellite took off over Japan, why is it going from east to west? Seems like a waste of horizontal velocity to me...

/I'm presuming I'm missing something that's obvious to an orbital mechanic...

It was fired southward. It flew over the Ryukyu islands which are almost next to Taiwan.



They launched at 88deg and the third stage yawed it over to 97deg in a dogleg - I think they did that so that Best Korea could remain not irradiated and on fire.


A dogleg? Someone left their lunch in the control unit.
 
2012-12-12 10:57:34 PM
TommyDeuce: Insatiable Jesus: AverageAmericanGuy: SJKebab: Hang on a minute. If the satellite took off over Japan, why is it going from east to west? Seems like a waste of horizontal velocity to me...

/I'm presuming I'm missing something that's obvious to an orbital mechanic...

It was fired southward. It flew over the Ryukyu islands which are almost next to Taiwan.



They launched at 88deg and the third stage yawed it over to 97deg in a dogleg - I think they did that so that Best Korea could remain not irradiated and on fire.

Speaking of which, it is over Russia now.

Wondering how Russia or China would react if it drops on anything remotely valuable in their lands.

/Putin, would probably catch it, fix it, and throw it back into orbit
//then go back to hunting tigers bare-handed
///Or banging a gymnast bare-back.


--------------------------

NK is the retarded little brother of China and China looks out for him and everybody knows that. I am a bit miffed that the relationship between China and NK is mostly forgotten in the media, gotta kiss that Chinese ass even when their stalking horse is out there launching shiat over Japan.
 
2012-12-12 10:58:07 PM
 
2012-12-12 10:58:50 PM
Gosling: Kazakhstan.

------------

Bless you.
 
2012-12-12 10:59:43 PM
It is probably just a cardboard box with an old Sony walkman in it that has a cassette of Great Leader's mutterings. It will play until the AA batteries run out in a day or so. I do wonder if it has a transmitter, HAMs would be listening for it.
 
2012-12-12 10:59:45 PM
Nearing perigee.

PERIGEE (low point):
Expected: 505.6
Last: 500.79
Next: Hopefully slightly over 500.79

APOGEE (high point):
Expected: 588.3
Last: 591.75
Next: Hopefully slightly below 591.75
 
2012-12-12 11:00:54 PM
approaching the low point of the orbit again now.

/how low can you go?
 
2012-12-12 11:03:41 PM

BakaDono: Time to get the Planetes crew up and running...


You sir, are awesome.

Unlike the idiot who voiced Yuri in the english dub. he's Russian, why you no voice him with Russian accent?
 
2012-12-12 11:04:46 PM
So essentially the North Koreans mission ended up like most of my attempts to orbit in Kerbal Space Program without the aid of Mechjeb?
 
2012-12-12 11:06:17 PM
Perigee is 500.74. Only 0.05 below the previous perigee, but still below.

PERIGEE (low point):
Expected: 505.6
Previous: 500.79
Last: 500.74
Next: Hopefully slightly over 500.74

APOGEE (high point):
Expected: 588.3
Last: 591.75
Next: Hopefully slightly below 591.75
 
2012-12-12 11:06:31 PM
500.65 this time

/ruh-roh
 
2012-12-12 11:08:33 PM
Perigee

i.imgur.com
 
2012-12-12 11:09:46 PM
Okay, yeah, big screen and little screen are definitely pulling different numbers.

I'll stay on the little screen for continuity purposes.
 
2012-12-12 11:09:51 PM
Gosling

studebaker hoch: 505 km x 588 km is a pretty decent orbit. Nicely circular, and above most of the atmospheric drag. It isn't going to re-enter for a long time.

That's the expected. Our last orbit was actually 500/591.


Is the orbiatchanging? That would be odd.
 
2012-12-12 11:10:43 PM
So do we know if its carrying anything like nukes?

Im hoping its filled with candy
 
2012-12-12 11:11:38 PM

studebaker hoch: Is the orbiatchanging? That would be odd.


Famous last words.
 
2012-12-12 11:13:08 PM
It done dang doodly done gone away. Did it assplode?
 
2012-12-12 11:14:40 PM

BATMANATEE: It done dang doodly done gone away. Did it assplode?


Reload. The tracker freezes occasionally.
 
2012-12-12 11:15:30 PM
oh god dammit
 
2012-12-12 11:16:43 PM

ItchyMcDoogle: So do we know if its carrying anything like nukes?

Im hoping its filled with candy


If it were, how far would the burnt sugar smell spread if and when it reentered? Should I ask xkcd?
 
2012-12-12 11:18:07 PM

ItchyMcDoogle: So do we know if its carrying anything like nukes?

Im hoping its filled with candy


It's the corpse of the old Dear Leader adorned with a sticky note with "문제를 수정!" written with a pink glitter gel pen.

/ALIEN TECHNOLOGY
 
2012-12-12 11:18:35 PM

Gosling: BATMANATEE: It done dang doodly done gone away. Did it assplode?

Reload. The tracker freezes occasionally.


Or gets censored.
 
2012-12-12 11:18:57 PM

Canton: If it were, how far would the burnt sugar smell spread if and when it reentered? Should I ask xkcd?


Ph.D. comics.
 
2012-12-12 11:19:01 PM
WTF could be changing the orbit?

I don't get it.
 
2012-12-12 11:20:32 PM
Gosling: Perigee is 500.74. Only 0.05 below the previous perigee, but still below.

PERIGEE (low point):
Expected: 505.6
Previous: 500.79
Last: 500.74
Next: Hopefully slightly over 500.74

APOGEE (high point):
Expected: 588.3
Last: 591.75
Next: Hopefully slightly below 591.75



It's been a long time since I played Orbiter, but if this thing is bricked and the periapsis is getting lower and the apoapsis is getting higher, it will be sucked in, right? How far out can we predict where it will land?
 
2012-12-12 11:20:52 PM

Linkster: Gosling: BATMANATEE: It done dang doodly done gone away. Did it assplode?

Reload. The tracker freezes occasionally.

Or gets censored.


1 Newsletter subscription please

/Prefer the mimeograph, not that fancy new Xerox stuff
 
2012-12-12 11:22:09 PM

studebaker hoch: WTF could be changing the orbit?

I don't get it.


dude, it's like a little speedboat going across / into a whirlpool, it takes awhile before it gets stuck.
 
2012-12-12 11:22:33 PM

utah dude: Canton: If it were, how far would the burnt sugar smell spread if and when it reentered? Should I ask xkcd?

Ph.D. comics.


Oh, that would also be a good possibility. The question seems silly enough for xkcd's "What If?" series, though. Either way...
 
2012-12-12 11:23:38 PM
I'm not an expert in orbital mechanics, but my understanding was that once something reaches an orbit with a sufficiently-high minimum altitude it's going to stay there for a while regardless of its attitude. Sure, atmospheric drag will *slowly* decay the orbit, but the fact that it's spinning out of control really doesn't have any significant bearing on it just falling out of the sky tonight or tomorrow. Given the sufficiently-high orbit it's in, at least compared to other LEO objects, wouldn't it take a large delta-v (a one-in-a-million impact with another satellite, say) to drop it out of orbit and cause reentry? Otherwise it's just a useless, tumbling box of electronics for a few years or decades.

In other words... unless somebody can explain it better... I think we're wasting time monitoring the orbital parameters expecting them to noticeably change.
 
2012-12-12 11:24:21 PM

studebaker hoch: WTF could be changing the orbit?

I don't get it.


Atmospheric drag, greater when the satellite is lower in it's orbit, will slowly circularize the orbit and also lower it.
 
2012-12-12 11:24:41 PM

BATMANATEE: Seems to be leveling out for now. Is 312 mi normal for a satellite?


WhyteRaven74: Gosling: And the arrow just started going up. Phew.

It hit perigee, the lowest point in the orbit. Now it's headed for apogee, the highest point, then it'll be down to perigee. Part of orbital mechanics is the high and low points of an orbit. And if you notice the perigee and apogee changing orbit after orbit? Your orbit is bad and your satellite is about to feel bad.


I thought it was supposed to be GEO up in Clarke land. DId they say they were launching a LEO satellite?
 
2012-12-12 11:24:47 PM

TommyDeuce: Linkster: Gosling: BATMANATEE: It done dang doodly done gone away. Did it assplode?

Reload. The tracker freezes occasionally.

Or gets censored.

1 Newsletter subscription please

/Prefer the mimeograph, not that fancy new Xerox stuff


Vellum with hand script work?
 
2012-12-12 11:26:16 PM

exPFCWintergreen: ItchyMcDoogle: So do we know if its carrying anything like nukes?

Im hoping its filled with candy

It's the corpse of the old Dear Leader adorned with a sticky note with "문제를 수정!" written with a pink glitter gel pen.


I am a little shocked that it would not surprise me. Putting him in a rocket so the world can look up at our dear departed leader to join the stars is just the batshieat crazy thing they would pull or shooting im out into space with a " FIX ME!" sign stapled on him. Ala Venture Brothers
 
2012-12-12 11:27:01 PM

dukeblue219: I'm not an expert in orbital mechanics, but my understanding was that once something reaches an orbit with a sufficiently-high minimum altitude it's going to stay there for a while regardless of its attitude. Sure, atmospheric drag will *slowly* decay the orbit, but the fact that it's spinning out of control really doesn't have any significant bearing on it just falling out of the sky tonight or tomorrow. Given the sufficiently-high orbit it's in, at least compared to other LEO objects, wouldn't it take a large delta-v (a one-in-a-million impact with another satellite, say) to drop it out of orbit and cause reentry? Otherwise it's just a useless, tumbling box of electronics for a few years or decades.


yes u are correct.
 
2012-12-12 11:27:16 PM

Linkster: TommyDeuce: Linkster: Gosling: BATMANATEE: It done dang doodly done gone away. Did it assplode?

Reload. The tracker freezes occasionally.

Or gets censored.

1 Newsletter subscription please

/Prefer the mimeograph, not that fancy new Xerox stuff

Vellum with hand script work?


Sure thing! Send one to my sister-in-law too, it'll confuse the hell out of her.

/How much extra for illumination?
 
2012-12-12 11:27:21 PM
It's already going down? At 583.something? I missed where the apogee was.
 
2012-12-12 11:27:51 PM
I was afeared there for a moment. Damn you CIA!
 
2012-12-12 11:28:33 PM

ItchyMcDoogle: exPFCWintergreen: ItchyMcDoogle: So do we know if its carrying anything like nukes?

Im hoping its filled with candy

It's the corpse of the old Dear Leader adorned with a sticky note with "문제를 수정!" written with a pink glitter gel pen.

I am a little shocked that it would not surprise me. Putting him in a rocket so the world can look up at our dear departed leader to join the stars is just the batshieat crazy thing they would pull or shooting im out into space with a " FIX ME!" sign stapled on him. Ala Venture Brothers


You know, if they cremated him, that would actually work . . .

Aw shiat, he's up there, isn't he?
 
2012-12-12 11:28:34 PM

Gosling: No, what I meant is, we're getting somewhat near the apogee then. The perigee came in some 4.8 km below the stated number of 505.6. How much could you stray from 505.6?


Unless you're actually at NORAD or one of these places, it's highly unlikely that the tracker program you're watching is measuring the actual real-time altitude of the satellite. It's just running calculations to predict the current state based on a set of parameters like the ones I posted earlier from Heavens Above. That 4.8 km error is probably just sloppy math. 

The "tumbling out of control" part also doesn't have much to do with the orbit. If the satellite isn't actively thrusting then its center of mass is in that orbit regardless of which way it's pointing. The orientation only comes into it when you're considering effects like atmospheric drag or solar radiation pressure, which are rather small effects for something that high.

The average orbital altitude (apogee + perigee, divided by 2) of the North Korean satellite is 543 km. That's well above the ISS (410 km) and a bit below the Hubble telescope (557 km). It's not coming down any time soon unless it gets a friendly nudge from something else up there.
 
2012-12-12 11:28:42 PM

dukeblue219: I'm not an expert in orbital mechanics, but my understanding was that once something reaches an orbit with a sufficiently-high minimum altitude it's going to stay there for a while regardless of its attitude. Sure, atmospheric drag will *slowly* decay the orbit, but the fact that it's spinning out of control really doesn't have any significant bearing on it just falling out of the sky tonight or tomorrow. Given the sufficiently-high orbit it's in, at least compared to other LEO objects, wouldn't it take a large delta-v (a one-in-a-million impact with another satellite, say) to drop it out of orbit and cause reentry? Otherwise it's just a useless, tumbling box of electronics for a few years or decades.

In other words... unless somebody can explain it better... I think we're wasting time monitoring the orbital parameters expecting them to noticeably change.


Yeah, it is going to be up there for a long time at that altitude. Maybe they didn't include any sort of attitude control system and the thing is spinning too fast for any directional antennas to work. Interaction with the Earth's magnetic field might eventually stop the spinning. They could have included some kind of magneto torque system that will eventually stabilize it; but I doubt it. It is probably just a box with some stuff in it.
 
2012-12-12 11:28:52 PM
PERIGEE (low point):
Expected: 505.6
Previous: 500.79
Last: 500.74

APOGEE (high point):
Expected: 588.3
Previous: 591.75
Last: Somewhere slightly above 583
 
2012-12-12 11:31:19 PM

studebaker hoch: If it's tumbling, it's very likely bricked. I wonder what happened to it.

505 km x 588 km is a pretty decent orbit. Nicely circular, and above most of the atmospheric drag. It isn't going to re-enter for a long time.


G14 did that; went on a tour across the horizon until the power ran out disrupting everybody's calm. System restarted when it caught a charge off its solar array and rebooted fine, TT&C back, everything under control.
 
2012-12-12 11:31:30 PM

Ivo Shandor: The "tumbling out of control" part also doesn't have much to do with the orbit. If the satellite isn't actively thrusting then its center of mass is in that orbit regardless of which way it's pointing. The orientation only comes into it when you're considering effects like atmospheric drag or solar radiation pressure, which are rather small effects for something that high.

The average orbital altitude (apogee + perigee, divided by 2) of the North Korean satellite is 543 km. That's well above the ISS (410 km) and a bit below the Hubble telescope (557 km). It's not coming down any time soon unless it gets a friendly nudge from something else up there.


Got it, thanks, that's sort of what I figured.
 
2012-12-12 11:31:39 PM

TommyDeuce: Linkster: TommyDeuce: Linkster: Gosling: BATMANATEE: It done dang doodly done gone away. Did it assplode?

Reload. The tracker freezes occasionally.

Or gets censored.

1 Newsletter subscription please

/Prefer the mimeograph, not that fancy new Xerox stuff

Vellum with hand script work?

Sure thing! Send one to my sister-in-law too, it'll confuse the hell out of her.

/How much extra for illumination?


Light table's on you, or $250 FOB.
 
2012-12-12 11:42:45 PM

Ivo Shandor: Gosling: No, what I meant is, we're getting somewhat near the apogee then. The perigee came in some 4.8 km below the stated number of 505.6. How much could you stray from 505.6?

Unless you're actually at NORAD or one of these places, it's highly unlikely that the tracker program you're watching is measuring the actual real-time altitude of the satellite. It's just running calculations to predict the current state based on a set of parameters like the ones I posted earlier from Heavens Above. That 4.8 km error is probably just sloppy math. 

The "tumbling out of control" part also doesn't have much to do with the orbit. If the satellite isn't actively thrusting then its center of mass is in that orbit regardless of which way it's pointing. The orientation only comes into it when you're considering effects like atmospheric drag or solar radiation pressure, which are rather small effects for something that high.

The average orbital altitude (apogee + perigee, divided by 2) of the North Korean satellite is 543 km. That's well above the ISS (410 km) and a bit below the Hubble telescope (557 km). It's not coming down any time soon unless it gets a friendly nudge from something else up there.


The drag is not going to make a difference any time soon. The tumbling will prevent stationkeeping, TT&C activities and will likely impact power generation as it sound like this was early on loss of control and may not have launched solar arrays--meaning tracking will become more complicated.

Orbit stability will say what happens; if it isn't stable, then you could see it come back to earth or fly to Mars. If its end orbit is highly elliptical, it could spend enough time hitting denser atmosphere and slowing down.
 
2012-12-12 11:43:35 PM

Canton: WhyteRaven74: AverageAmericanGuy: Could a giant blob of goo be launched into debris filled areas and then return to burn up in the atmosphere safely?

Well as long as the goo didn't also take actual satellites with it...

Still not a bad concept. Not all the debris up there is magnetic, though I assume some of it is. On the other hand, the goo would have to be controlled somehow, which could be problematic.

Magnets, goo, and rocket fuel, working together for the common good?


1.bp.blogspot.com

Maybe not. Unless Steven McQueen and his gang of teenagers are down at the drive-in.
 
2012-12-12 11:45:13 PM
apogee 591.8k this time
 
2012-12-12 11:54:39 PM

Gyrfalcon: Canton: WhyteRaven74: AverageAmericanGuy: Could a giant blob of goo be launched into debris filled areas and then return to burn up in the atmosphere safely?

Well as long as the goo didn't also take actual satellites with it...

Still not a bad concept. Not all the debris up there is magnetic, though I assume some of it is. On the other hand, the goo would have to be controlled somehow, which could be problematic.

Magnets, goo, and rocket fuel, working together for the common good?

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 850x478]

Maybe not. Unless Steven McQueen and his gang of teenagers are down at the drive-in.


Steven?

/wags finger
//son I am Disappoint
///3xslashy
 
2012-12-12 11:57:28 PM

Thunderboy: It's not spinning out of control, Great Leader merely put a little Engrish on it when he lofted it into orbit.


Well played, sir.
 
2012-12-12 11:58:17 PM
Are any countries helping Best Korea with telemetry?
 
2012-12-13 12:00:18 AM
t0.gstatic.com
Gee, that's really great guys. I'm really impressed, oh, wait, no I'm not.
Welcome to 1952.

And, how are those starving masses anyway? That sure takes me back.
To 1945.
 
2012-12-13 12:01:43 AM

utah dude: Insatiable Jesus: Jesus, knowing NK, there is some doomed soul trying to drive this thing and running out of air right now.

Kamicrazy, but,

yah, funny but they actually could target using a pilot..

at Japan. :(


Not really. Farking Asian drivers, y'know.
 
2012-12-13 12:05:02 AM
So what are the chances the X-37B is using that thing for target practice?
 
2012-12-13 12:08:28 AM

Linkster: Gyrfalcon: Canton: WhyteRaven74: AverageAmericanGuy: Could a giant blob of goo be launched into debris filled areas and then return to burn up in the atmosphere safely?

Well as long as the goo didn't also take actual satellites with it...

Still not a bad concept. Not all the debris up there is magnetic, though I assume some of it is. On the other hand, the goo would have to be controlled somehow, which could be problematic.

Magnets, goo, and rocket fuel, working together for the common good?

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 850x478]

Maybe not. Unless Steven McQueen and his gang of teenagers are down at the drive-in.

Steven?

/wags finger
//son I am Disappoint
///3xslashy


Not as dissappoint as I am.

upload.wikimedia.org

Observe and learn, young grasshopper, and appreciate bad old horror movies.
 
2012-12-13 12:16:31 AM

Gyrfalcon: Linkster: Gyrfalcon: Canton: WhyteRaven74: AverageAmericanGuy: Could a giant blob of goo be launched into debris filled areas and then return to burn up in the atmosphere safely?

Well as long as the goo didn't also take actual satellites with it...

Still not a bad concept. Not all the debris up there is magnetic, though I assume some of it is. On the other hand, the goo would have to be controlled somehow, which could be problematic.

Magnets, goo, and rocket fuel, working together for the common good?

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 850x478]

Maybe not. Unless Steven McQueen and his gang of teenagers are down at the drive-in.

Steven?

/wags finger
//son I am Disappoint
///3xslashy

Not as dissappoint as I am.

[upload.wikimedia.org image 225x345]

Observe and learn, young grasshopper, and appreciate bad old horror movies.


Saw the movie as a 4yo, didn't know Stevy played as Steven in the day, Good on you Sir!

/Old Videophile
//blue four work for you?
///lawn professionally manicured
 
2012-12-13 12:20:11 AM

TommyDeuce: ItchyMcDoogle: exPFCWintergreen: ItchyMcDoogle: So do we know if its carrying anything like nukes?

Im hoping its filled with candy

It's the corpse of the old Dear Leader adorned with a sticky note with "문제를 수정!" written with a pink glitter gel pen.

I am a little shocked that it would not surprise me. Putting him in a rocket so the world can look up at our dear departed leader to join the stars is just the batshieat crazy thing they would pull or shooting im out into space with a " FIX ME!" sign stapled on him. Ala Venture Brothers

You know, if they cremated him, that would actually work . . .

Aw shiat, he's up there, isn't he?


Isn't it comforting knowing that the former Glorious Leader of Best Korea is smiling down from above?

img831.imageshack.us
 
2012-12-13 12:21:14 AM

studebaker hoch: Are any countries helping Best Korea with telemetry?


DirecTV customer service. Which is to say ... India.
 
2012-12-13 12:34:59 AM
Mega Steve

Isn't it comforting knowing that the former Glorious Leader of Best Korea is smiling down from above?

Are we supposed to be afraid of the guy with the potato cannon?
 
2012-12-13 12:40:39 AM
500.41 this time
 
2012-12-13 12:42:01 AM
perigee down again to 500.41k
 
2012-12-13 12:43:29 AM

Mega Steve: TommyDeuce: ItchyMcDoogle: exPFCWintergreen: ItchyMcDoogle: So do we know if its carrying anything like nukes?

Im hoping its filled with candy

It's the corpse of the old Dear Leader adorned with a sticky note with "문제를 수정!" written with a pink glitter gel pen.

I am a little shocked that it would not surprise me. Putting him in a rocket so the world can look up at our dear departed leader to join the stars is just the batshieat crazy thing they would pull or shooting im out into space with a " FIX ME!" sign stapled on him. Ala Venture Brothers

You know, if they cremated him, that would actually work . . .

Aw shiat, he's up there, isn't he?

Isn't it comforting knowing that the former Glorious Leader of Best Korea is smiling down from above?


I'm cackling with glee at the thought of the erratic orbit of Kim's corpse being a constant menace needing to be tracked in all of the satellite calculations done by aerospace engineers for decades to come. You can't beat that kind of legacy.

/"Houston to ISS, decrease altitude to 330 km, looks like Kim is dropping by for a visit again"
 
2012-12-13 12:43:56 AM
Hobodeluxe: So what are the chances the X-37B is using that thing for target practice?



-------------------------


I wonder if we briefed China, if we did it. NK sending a ballistic missile up certainly warranted us doing something. Odds are that the thing failed on the factory floor, it being Best Korea and all. I still don't doubt for a second that the X-37B going up the day before was no coincidence. And the X-37B launch was well publicized, kind of like we were saying, "Don't do it." And, of course they did. I wonder if we're going to capture it.

Might be "interesting" to see just how much Chinese tech is in it.
 
2012-12-13 12:53:56 AM
It's over Madagascar. You know what to do,
 
2012-12-13 01:02:39 AM
I'm guessing they just filled it with turds so it will spend the next two weeks raining shiat down on the earth. Don't forget your umbrellas.
 
2012-12-13 01:21:01 AM

dsider: perigee down again to 500.41k


When it gets to 490 ... SELL!
 
2012-12-13 01:46:29 AM
500.38
 
2012-12-13 01:59:50 AM
muck4doo: 500.38


On a linear line, that gives it 6.2 months to zero, based on perigee numbers stated here, using the timestamp of the posts. Completely un-scientific but I was curious.
 
2012-12-13 02:12:28 AM
I'm surprised they're doing cold weather launches. Look at all that snow.

resources3.news.com.au
 
2012-12-13 02:18:23 AM
500.36

not sure where muck4doo got his number from but the timing for perigee was off even if the number was close to the one I have
 
2012-12-13 02:33:44 AM

Insatiable Jesus: Hobodeluxe: So what are the chances the X-37B is using that thing for target practice?



-------------------------


I wonder if we briefed China, if we did it. NK sending a ballistic missile up certainly warranted us doing something. Odds are that the thing failed on the factory floor, it being Best Korea and all. I still don't doubt for a second that the X-37B going up the day before was no coincidence. And the X-37B launch was well publicized, kind of like we were saying, "Don't do it." And, of course they did. I wonder if we're going to capture it.

Might be "interesting" to see just how much Chinese tech is in it.


Doubtful that the X-37B is anywhere even near it. It takes a good deal of time and/or fuel in order to sync up orbits. It would have been much easier to launch the X-37B after if they wanted to intercept because they could time the launch and set it on the correct heading, just like when they want a rendezvous with the ISS.

I'd bet there is about the same amount of Chinese technology as in one of our comm satellites. China doesn't have anything to gain by supporting the N. Korean space program, they are further along by decades. China wants N. Korea as a buffer between them and S. Korea and to avoid any kind of humanitarian/refugee situation along the border. They most likely try to keep N. Korea in line as much as possible, kind of like the guy who trys to get their dog not to bark in the middle of the night so it doesn't upset the neighbors.
 
2012-12-13 03:04:59 AM
Lt_Ryan: Doubtful that the X-37B is anywhere even near it. It takes a good deal of time and/or fuel in order to sync up orbits. It would have been much easier to launch the X-37B after if they wanted to intercept because they could time the launch and set it on the correct heading, just like when they want a rendezvous with the ISS.I'd bet there is about the same amount of Chinese technology as in one of our comm satellites.

China doesn't have anything to gain by supporting the N. Korean space program, they are further along by decades. China wants N. Korea as a buffer between them and S. Korea and to avoid any kind of humanitarian/refugee situation along the border. They most likely try to keep N. Korea in line as much as possible, kind of like the guy who trys to get their dog not to bark in the middle of the night so it doesn't upset the neighbors.


--------------------------

I don't know that I can so easily dismiss any relationship because of the coincidental launch times. I just read an article about Hexagon spysat program back in the 70s and 80s, which was just declassified. Nobody would have believed what the KH9 could do at the time, including the engineers they hired to build it. I can only imagine what sort of secret capabilities we might have. Maybe the X-37B launched something else at it, or could, or will. Or maybe sends a small camera towards it and we see photographic evidence that they really did launch Dear Leader to watch over us all from above. I don't know, it's just hard to dismiss the timing.

The DPRK is like China's little retarded brother, but they are useful idiots to China.
 
2012-12-13 03:33:55 AM
He's all over the place! Nine hundred feet up to 1300 feet. What an asshole!
 
2012-12-13 05:27:20 AM

Gosling: North Korea had better hope to hell that that ISN'T a nuclear warhead, and if so, that it doesn't hit something and go blooey. If it even so much as falls in a random spot in the Mauritanian desert, if it detonates, Kim's ass will be joining it in Mauritania for all the Western missiles blowing it there.


Idiot.
 
2012-12-13 05:52:51 AM

ItchyMcDoogle: [www.millionaireplayboy.com image 400x250]

Lex Luthor Unavailable for comment

//Will stay in Otisburg


I got dibs on "Teschmacher Peaks", which most likely aren't peaks anymore but I have a good imagination.
After all this time and seeing Superman hundreds of times, I never realized the "Teschmacher Peaks" on that map.
 
2012-12-13 08:29:07 AM

Anybody else notice this?


oi47.tinypic.com

sharetv.org
 
2012-12-13 09:13:06 AM
BravadoGT

North Koreans build dirty bomb, make it resemble a satellite. Launch it into orbit, where it "spins out of control" until it finally comes down in a fine mist over some US suburban area.




doubtfulnews.com
Honestly...... I'd laugh.
 
2012-12-13 09:23:30 AM
sharetv.org

Honestly...... I'd laugh.

One World Trade Center has come a long way.

Once they finish rehabbing the upper floors and get all the glass replaced, you won't even be able to tell that 9/11 happened.
 
2012-12-13 10:06:58 AM

soup: [i.imgur.com image 460x352]


Is that a Far Out Space Nuts reference? Awesome!
 
2012-12-13 10:12:26 AM

studebaker hoch: sharetv.org

Honestly...... I'd laugh.

One World Trade Center has come a long way.

Once they finish rehabbing the upper floors and get all the glass replaced, you won't even be able to tell that 9/11 happened.


Well, except for the two giant holes where buildings used to be.
 
2012-12-13 12:06:18 PM

studebaker hoch Smartest Funniest
2012-12-13 09:23:30 AM

sharetv.org

Honestly...... I'd laugh.

One World Trade Center has come a long way.

Once they finish rehabbing the upper floors and get all the glass replaced, you won't even be able to tell that 9/11 happened.

Sadly, not true
commonsensealternatives.com

A couple of stupid buildings were the smallest bit of damage done. 
The things that mattter are unrecoverable.
 
2012-12-13 12:20:37 PM

KrispyKritter: every day lil boots treachery power grows. instead of just leveling the luxury liner where campbell soup kid & his lackeys hang five and eliminating a threat just let the farker get more dangerous with each passing year. more fun that way, scare the mericanos. its easier to put out a fire thats still small, call me kookie. take out the garbage, clean up the mess, give Best Korea to China, wipe out honorable debt.


"They're words, Captain, but not as we know them."

*reaches for his KrispyKritter-to-English dictionary...*
 
2012-12-13 12:24:40 PM
Teschmacher Peaks would be an awesome busty stripper name. But only nerds would get it.
 
2012-12-13 01:33:24 PM
That satellite is all over the place.
 
2012-12-13 10:02:24 PM
apogee 593.23km tonight. is there anywhere that has been recording these?
 
2012-12-14 06:32:11 PM
To goo
 
Displayed 251 of 251 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report