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(CNN)   IKEA monkey mom wants her monkey back   (cnn.com) divider line 134
    More: Followup, IKEA  
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12049 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Dec 2012 at 3:09 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-12 02:57:31 PM
i277.photobucket.com
Is already becoming a meme...
 
2012-12-12 03:06:01 PM
i274.photobucket.com
 
2012-12-12 03:07:04 PM
Why did she lose it in the first place?
 
2012-12-12 03:08:53 PM

Dumski: Is already becoming a meme...


weknowmemes.com
 
2012-12-12 03:11:36 PM
I want my monkey back,
monkey back,
monkey back.
Chili's monkey back ribs...
 
2012-12-12 03:12:13 PM
thedroidyourelookingfor.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-12-12 03:12:22 PM
She says that the monkey is not her pet, it's her baby. Ergo she should be charged with child endangerment.
 
2012-12-12 03:12:47 PM
Your inside is out and your outside is in.

Your outside is in and your inside is out.

Come on.
 
2012-12-12 03:12:48 PM
Better headline/detail: She showers with the monkey.
 
2012-12-12 03:13:03 PM
I totally missed this story, background please??
 
2012-12-12 03:13:16 PM
thecount.com
 
2012-12-12 03:13:31 PM
thumbnails.hulu.com
 
2012-12-12 03:13:55 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2012-12-12 03:14:12 PM
Any text story for this?
 
2012-12-12 03:14:24 PM
i219.photobucket.com
 
2012-12-12 03:15:03 PM
Well, I am just a monkey man. I'm glad you are a monkey woman too
 
2012-12-12 03:16:02 PM
i.huffpost.com
 
2012-12-12 03:16:14 PM

WhoGAS: Any text story for this?


Dumb broad thinks the monkey is a child and wants it back because she's a dumb broad. She should never be allowed to own another animal. Or breed.

That pretty much sums it up.
 
2012-12-12 03:18:10 PM
Did they spank that monkey too?

/never heard of him...
 
2012-12-12 03:20:24 PM

FriarReb98: I totally missed this story, background please??


Some lady was illegally keeping a monkey in Canada. It escaped from her car and loitered around an Ikea while wearing a nice coat. It was captured and taken to a primate center or something. The lady wants it back.
 
2012-12-12 03:20:48 PM
Having a pet is one thing. making a monkey (or anything other than a human) your "child" is mental illness.
 
2012-12-12 03:21:02 PM
blu.stb.s-msn.com
 
2012-12-12 03:21:42 PM

Vegan Meat Popsicle: WhoGAS: Any text story for this?

Dumb broad thinks the monkey is a child and wants it back because she's a dumb broad. She should never be allowed to own another animal. Or breed.

That pretty much sums it up.


I bet she can't, hence the monkey.
/or adopt, hence the crazy
 
2012-12-12 03:21:45 PM

Vegan Meat Popsicle: WhoGAS: Any text story for this?

Dumb broad thinks the monkey is a child and wants it back because she's a dumb broad. She should never be allowed to own another animal. Or breed.

That pretty much sums it up.


Thank you.

I agree on the animal part. I don't know enough about her to comment on the breeding part, but maybe she'd make a good practice mare.
 
2012-12-12 03:22:01 PM
That IKEA monkey is just adorable and definitely makes me want to buy furniture. In fact, I think I would buy anything that IKEA monkey recommended. He'll make a trustworthy logo that will save the company. I
 
2012-12-12 03:22:16 PM
Pretty sure the original article I read stated that monkeys were not allowed as pets in wherever this was
 
2012-12-12 03:24:10 PM

WhoGAS: Vegan Meat Popsicle: WhoGAS: Any text story for this?

Dumb broad thinks the monkey is a child and wants it back because she's a dumb broad. She should never be allowed to own another animal. Or breed.

That pretty much sums it up.

Thank you.

I agree on the animal part. I don't know enough about her to comment on the breeding part, but maybe she'd make a good practice mare.


Seriously,
How abused can that "poor" monkey be when he is sporting a BAD ASS COAT like that?!?! He's a monkey for christ sake, not Clint Eastwood.
Maybe he had separation anxiety from Mommy?
/I bet the breast feeds him.
 
2012-12-12 03:24:12 PM
Video link. Eww gross.
 
2012-12-12 03:25:14 PM

HailRobonia: She says that the monkey is not her pet, it's her baby. Ergo she should be charged with child endangerment.


Ergo she should be locked up in a loony bin.
 
2012-12-12 03:26:07 PM
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-12-12 03:29:43 PM
I think that woumen should get a new pet.

A Cu-koo bird seems appropriate.
 
2012-12-12 03:30:56 PM
Was the monkey illegally possessed?
 
2012-12-12 03:33:43 PM
These macaques are banned as pets for several reasons, most notably because they are a vector for several diseases: hepatitis, herpes, and even distemper.

In her attempts to get one, she most certainly would have found out fast how illegal it was.

So some dumb broad gets an illegal pet (illegal for a variety of good reasons) dresses it up like a child and takes it into public...and lets it get away.

Now she wants it back? I hope they laugh in her face.
 
2012-12-12 03:34:25 PM
Really? The news articles I read yesterday and the day before said that she was OK with the Sanctuary keeping it, if they were going to take care of it properly.

So. Congrats for being two days late and wrong on the news.
 
2012-12-12 03:35:11 PM
The woman is obviously unbalanced. Monkeys are not pets, or babies for crissakes, they are wild, unpredictable animals, who should be in their natural habitat. Plus, that coat isn't that cool.
 
2012-12-12 03:36:36 PM
Hey, it's her meenky.

i.ytimg.com
 
2012-12-12 03:36:46 PM

kombat_unit: Was the monkey illegally possessed?


Yes it was.
 
2012-12-12 03:39:25 PM

Walker: kombat_unit: Was the monkey illegally possessed?

Yes it was.


Ok, then F whatever she has to say. I hope they throw her ass in jail too. That coat was pretty sweet tho.
 
2012-12-12 03:40:34 PM

dogdaze: Why did she lose it in the first place?


Monkeys aren't very good at following commands such as "wait in the car while I shop for crappy furniture".
 
2012-12-12 03:41:15 PM
The only thing in the story that isn't loathsome is the monkey. Dumbass owner on one hand and anthropomorphically deranged shelter worker could both help the world out by having a head on car crash.
 
2012-12-12 03:41:29 PM
Pure awesome.
 
2012-12-12 03:41:47 PM

Joe Peanut: dogdaze: Why did she lose it in the first place?

Monkeys aren't very good at following commands such as "wait in the car while I shop for crappy furniture".


I know MY monkey never follows orders.
 
2012-12-12 03:42:10 PM
I say ship him to Key West Florida and let him play with Hemingway's cats.
Their regulated, its all good.
 
2012-12-12 03:42:33 PM
She can have my monkey.

note: I call my penis "monkey"
 
2012-12-12 03:42:59 PM

Joe Peanut: dogdaze: Why did she lose it in the first place?

Monkeys aren't very good at following commands such as "wait in the car while I shop for crappy furniture".


God I hate to say this but Ikea's stuff is getting a little bit better. They took a serious quality nosedive before the economy tanked, and now I guess they're trying to get customers back by not selling so much crappy stuff.
 
2012-12-12 03:44:36 PM

kombat_unit: Was the monkey illegally possessed?


I think the Church frowns on all possessions.
 
2012-12-12 03:46:03 PM
'He sleeps with me, eats with me, showers with me, goes shopping with me': Owner of Darwin the Ikea monkey desperate to get her 'baby' back

B*tch is cray cray. She's a lawyer too. This explains how so many innocent people wind up in jail. They have lawyers like her.
 
GBB
2012-12-12 03:47:26 PM
Am I the only one that thought "employee" when I read "IKEA monkey"?
 
2012-12-12 03:48:08 PM
all that crap from the woman at the shelter about how the monkey would be able to express itself as a monkey and commune with the other monkeys is PC bullshiat.

they are going to keep in in a cage and hustle folks to pay for it.
 
2012-12-12 03:48:37 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: Joe Peanut: dogdaze: Why did she lose it in the first place?

Monkeys aren't very good at following commands such as "wait in the car while I shop for crappy furniture".

I know MY monkey never follows orders.


Mine gives them.
 
2012-12-12 03:52:41 PM

Diogenes: kombat_unit: Was the monkey illegally possessed?

I think the Church frowns on all possessions.


assets0.ordienetworks.com
 
2012-12-12 03:52:57 PM

Shazam999: Joe Peanut: dogdaze: Why did she lose it in the first place?

Monkeys aren't very good at following commands such as "wait in the car while I shop for crappy furniture".

God I hate to say this but Ikea's stuff is getting a little bit better. They took a serious quality nosedive before the economy tanked, and now I guess they're trying to get customers back by not selling so much crappy stuff.


They're the Kia or Hyundai of the furniture world.
 
2012-12-12 03:53:59 PM
So is that monkey made of particle board and wood laminate?
 
2012-12-12 03:55:34 PM

Vegan Meat Popsicle: WhoGAS: Any text story for this?

Dumb broad thinks the monkey is a child and wants it back because she's a dumb broad. She should never be allowed to own another animal. Or breed.

That pretty much sums it up.


Look on the bright side... as long as she has an animal baby, maybe she won't have a real one.
 
2012-12-12 03:57:35 PM

AeAe: She can have my monkey.

note: I call my penis "monkey"


Too crazy.

hungryhealthyhappy.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-12-12 04:02:40 PM
And Cundalini wants his hand back.
 
2012-12-12 04:03:28 PM

FriarReb98: I totally missed this story, background please??


Background is where the farkin' AUTO-PLAY VIDEO is when I have 6 tabs open!! 


If only there was a tag we could use to warn people of video links......
 
2012-12-12 04:03:39 PM

kombat_unit: Was the monkey illegally possessed?


Yes, the demons lacked the proper paperwork
 
2012-12-12 04:03:55 PM

JackieRabbit: The All-Powerful Atheismo: Joe Peanut: dogdaze: Why did she lose it in the first place?

Monkeys aren't very good at following commands such as "wait in the car while I shop for crappy furniture".

I know MY monkey never follows orders.

Mine gives them.


Are you guys talkin' about Macaque?
 
2012-12-12 04:04:22 PM
Mommy is pretty damn good looking.
 
2012-12-12 04:05:31 PM
This is why it escaped..

majikthise.typepad.com
 
2012-12-12 04:06:01 PM
The take away is that crazy monkey lady may be the new crazy cat lady.
 
2012-12-12 04:07:18 PM
I had a couple of Rhesus monkeys when I lived in the Philippines. Oh yeah, deys cute as a button when young, but damm, when they grow up they are mean, mean, attack machines. Prepetual two year old brats with nasty teeth. They cannot be pets. Period.
 
2012-12-12 04:14:16 PM

GBB: Am I the only one that thought "employee" when I read "IKEA monkey"?


probably.
 
2012-12-12 04:16:05 PM
As I said before, she should have never left him in the car.
Monkey need smoke.
Monkey captured.
No more monkey.
 
2012-12-12 04:16:38 PM

mark12A: I had a couple of Rhesus monkeys when I lived in the Philippines. Oh yeah, deys cute as a button when young, but damm, when they grow up they are mean, mean, attack machines. Prepetual two year old brats with nasty teeth. They cannot be pets. Period.


Too be fair, how sweet was their wardrobes? Or did you leave them nekkid?
 
2012-12-12 04:24:26 PM

MorePeasPlease: Neither of the photos in question contain images of monkeys. Your argument is invalid.


ORLY idiot, then what's the one in the coat-an ape?
 
2012-12-12 04:25:09 PM

MorePeasPlease: ORLY idiot, then what's the one in the coat-an ape?


Welcome to my ignore list, dude.
 
2012-12-12 04:25:35 PM

Rincewind53: Dumski: Is already becoming a meme...

[weknowmemes.com image 427x765]


I laugh every time. I can't help it.
 
2012-12-12 04:26:13 PM

MorePeasPlease: MorePeasPlease: Neither of the photos in question contain images of monkeys. Your argument is invalid.

ORLY idiot, then what's the one in the coat-an ape?


You are in a room with a gorilla, a chimpanzee, and a rhesus monkey. The gorilla has a banana, the chimpanzee has a stick, and the rhesus monkey has a rock. What is the smartest primate in the room?
 
2012-12-12 04:30:12 PM

ha-ha-guy: MorePeasPlease: MorePeasPlease: Neither of the photos in question contain images of monkeys. Your argument is invalid.

ORLY idiot, then what's the one in the coat-an ape?

You are in a room with a gorilla, a chimpanzee, and a rhesus monkey. The gorilla has a banana, the chimpanzee has a stick, and the rhesus monkey has a rock. What is the smartest primate in the room?


Depends where they buried the survivors.
 
2012-12-12 04:30:25 PM

ha-ha-guy: You are in a room with a gorilla, a chimpanzee, and a rhesus monkey. The gorilla has a banana, the chimpanzee has a stick, and the rhesus monkey has a rock. What is the smartest primate in the room?


Trick question-is there a mouse lemur in my pocket?

/or am I just happy to see me?
 
2012-12-12 04:31:16 PM

MorePeasPlease: MorePeasPlease: ORLY idiot, then what's the one in the coat-an ape?

Welcome to my ignore list, dude.


You forgot to change accounts before posting your reply, FYI.
 
2012-12-12 04:33:41 PM

MorePeasPlease: MorePeasPlease: ORLY idiot, then what's the one in the coat-an ape?

Welcome to my ignore list, dude.


You know; the first sign of insanity is talking to yourself.
 
2012-12-12 04:33:52 PM

ariosto: MorePeasPlease: MorePeasPlease: ORLY idiot, then what's the one in the coat-an ape?

Welcome to my ignore list, dude.

You forgot to change accounts before posting your reply, FYI.


Either that or I think we found someone crazier than the monkey's owner.
 
2012-12-12 04:35:26 PM

Curious: all that crap from the woman at the shelter about how the monkey would be able to express itself as a monkey and commune with the other monkeys is PC bullshiat.

they are going to keep in in a cage and hustle folks to pay for it.


Yes, she now has her own pet monkey. How nice.
 
2012-12-12 04:35:49 PM

dogdaze: Why did she lose it in the first place?



Toronto doesn't allow people to own certain animals.  That includes monkeys.
 
In an other article the woman said she lent the monkey to a friend of hers.  It got loose and ended up in the IKEA parking lot. 
 
2012-12-12 04:38:06 PM
Oh, give the woman a break. She might be a little crazy taking a surrogate child but she's got a point: the little thing is adorable.

And the little part is important. Any primate larger than this and you start facing serious trouble.
 
2012-12-12 04:43:53 PM

MorePeasPlease: MorePeasPlease: ORLY idiot, then what's the one in the coat-an ape?

Welcome to my ignore list, dude.


Did you forget to switch to your alt?
 
2012-12-12 04:44:23 PM
Here is my $0.2.

Too often do people mistake the cute actions of monkeys as SO addorable only because they are so human-like. And perhaps they are. But most monkey species are not domesticated. They could snap at any moment.

But here is the other side of the situation. That woman raised that little guy from a baby. He now expects his human contact. If they put him into a cage with a bunch of other monkeys, he's not going to know how to take care of himself. He'll probably wind up hurt or dead.

This woman did a terrible disservice to this poor little fella's life.

Well, since the damage is done, just let her have it back.
 
2012-12-12 04:45:24 PM

wildcardjack: Oh, give the woman a break. She might be a little crazy taking a surrogate child but she's got a point: the little thing is adorable.

And the little part is important. Any primate larger than this and you start facing serious trouble.


Penis and face eatin' kind of trouble.
 
2012-12-12 04:47:08 PM
Who cares if she owns a monkey? It's small enough that the worst it will do is look adorable in little coats and fling poo at her.

How is it any different than owning a dog?
 
2012-12-12 04:47:21 PM

ha-ha-guy: You are in a room with a gorilla, a chimpanzee, and a rhesus monkey. The gorilla has a banana, the chimpanzee has a stick, and the rhesus monkey has a rock. What is the smartest primate in the room?


Wait, I know this! It's a trick question! The answer is THE BANANA!


data.whicdn.com
 
2012-12-12 04:49:34 PM
Monkey's should never be pets period. Once they hit puberty they get very violent and will instinctively attack the face and genitals.

People who love dangerous exotic pets are like crazy cat people, they get way too attached to the animal and don't realize the danger.
 
2012-12-12 04:51:30 PM
Really? I'm the only one who thinks this is sad? That the monkey is a scared child being taken away from the only home that he knows?
 
2012-12-12 04:52:24 PM
If only there was a monkey DREAM Act where the monkey that was raised here who's parents broke the law, not him, would be allowed to stay.
 
2012-12-12 04:52:48 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: Joe Peanut: dogdaze: Why did she lose it in the first place?

Monkeys aren't very good at following commands such as "wait in the car while I shop for crappy furniture".

I know MY monkey never follows orders.


Same here. That's why I have to constantly spank it. Especially when it gets a little rowdy in public.
 
2012-12-12 04:53:09 PM

FriarReb98: I totally missed this story, background please??



Here's the original thread from a few days ago.
 
http://www.fark.com/comments/7477197/Planet-of-Apes-is-coming-true-M on keys-are-now-getting-dressed-shopping-for-Swedish-furniture
 
2012-12-12 04:55:35 PM
♪ In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight ♫
 
2012-12-12 05:01:05 PM
all this and no one said ATTENTION WHORE!!!
 
2012-12-12 05:01:33 PM

Insatiable Jesus: The only thing in the story that isn't loathsome is the monkey. Dumbass owner on one hand and anthropomorphically deranged shelter worker could both help the world out by having a head on car crash.


Actually, the shelter worker was right on. He's a monkey. He should be a monkey. He should be around other monkeys. She couched is as "He should be himself" or words to that effect. She's saying he should be a monkey among other monkeys.

This is neither deranged nor anthropomorphic...or do you need to hear it from a man?
 
2012-12-12 05:03:54 PM

STRYPERSWINE: Really? I'm the only one who thinks this is sad? That the monkey is a scared child being taken away from the only home that he knows?



According to the followup thread this species of monkey needs specialized care.  They're also known carriers of Herpes B.  While the animal shows no symptoms as a host they can transmit it to humans through a bite or scratch.  Herpes B can be fatal to humans.
 
http://www.fark.com/comments/7478500/The-monkey-is-fine-You-can-all- go -home-now
 
2012-12-12 05:07:59 PM
Contents Under Pressure: Actually, the shelter worker was right on. He's a monkey. He should be a monkey. He should be around other monkeys. She couched is as "He should be himself" or words to that effect. She's saying he should be a monkey among other monkeys.



---------------------------------

Monkeys don't come from Canada. They don't typically live in cages. And now, this monkey is incapable of living in the wild after being raised with humans. So, let's just keep it locked in this metal cage while the tool responsible for cleaning shiat out of the cages waxes poetic about what monkeys are and are not. The sensible solution is to put it down, but noooooo, that would mean treating this cute, cuddly monkey like the chicken that went into my sandwich today, perish the thought. I know enough people in animal rescue to know that they are usually batshiat crazy when it comes to differentiating between people and animals. And in a world full of human suffering, they chose to go help farking animals. cuckoo.
 
2012-12-12 05:08:28 PM
as a regular reader of PeopleOfWalmart.com, I am not surprised at anybody having a monkey in a store. I am however surprised by a monkey with such a nice coat.

media.peopleofwalmart.com

\hot like the contents of a monkey's diapers
 
2012-12-12 05:19:43 PM
"Given the history and current-day context of racialized standards of beauty, and the hypersexualization of people of color, when a white woman makes fun of a black women's body, especially in a way that hypersexualizes her and draws on the stereotype of black women's big butts, it's racist,"

But it was my "service" animal.
 
2012-12-12 05:26:23 PM

ha-ha-guy: MorePeasPlease: MorePeasPlease: Neither of the photos in question contain images of monkeys. Your argument is invalid.

ORLY idiot, then what's the one in the coat-an ape?

You are in a room with a gorilla, a chimpanzee, and a rhesus monkey. The gorilla has a banana, the chimpanzee has a stick, and the rhesus monkey has a rock. What is the smartest primate in the room?


Certainly not me, if I willingly go into a room with those wild animals.

/does the rhesus monkey have dynamite?
 
2012-12-12 05:28:40 PM

Curious: all that crap from the woman at the shelter about how the monkey would be able to express itself as a monkey and commune with the other monkeys is PC bullshiat.

they are going to keep in in a cage and hustle folks to pay for it.


Worst of all, they took his coat!
 
2012-12-12 05:29:18 PM
Monkeys are not pets.

Dogs are pets. Cats are pets. Fish are decoration.
 
2012-12-12 05:33:11 PM
This person deserves to have her face eaten by a herpes-infested monkey.
 
2012-12-12 05:37:19 PM

durbnpoisn: Here is my $0.2.

Too often do people mistake the cute actions of monkeys as SO addorable only because they are so human-like. And perhaps they are. But most monkey species are not domesticated. They could snap at any moment.

But here is the other side of the situation. That woman raised that little guy from a baby. He now expects his human contact. If they put him into a cage with a bunch of other monkeys, he's not going to know how to take care of himself. He'll probably wind up hurt or dead.

This woman did a terrible disservice to this poor little fella's life.

Well, since the damage is done, just let her have it back.


The monkey is still a baby and can be rehabbed so that it fits in with other monkeys.
 
2012-12-12 05:39:42 PM
LargeCanine: Monkeys are not pets.

Dogs are pets. Cats are pets. Fish are decoration.



-----------------------

Exactly. It's a wild animal that has been crippled in its ability to live as such. It should be afforded all the same rights as the insects PETA folks murder on the grille of their Scion enroute to their AW PETA fest.
 
2012-12-12 05:40:10 PM

ha-ha-guy: MorePeasPlease: MorePeasPlease: Neither of the photos in question contain images of monkeys. Your argument is invalid.

ORLY idiot, then what's the one in the coat-an ape?

You are in a room with a gorilla, a chimpanzee, and a rhesus monkey. The gorilla has a banana, the chimpanzee has a stick, and the rhesus monkey has a rock. What is the smartest primate in the room?


This lovely lady, who could well serve as assistant Librarian at a certain University
 
2012-12-12 05:42:02 PM
Contents Under Pressure: The monkey is still a baby and can be rehabbed so that it fits in with other monkeys.



-------------------------------


I am so glad that you anthropomorphic people have your priorities straight. Monkey rehab? Really? What a brilliant use of our limited time and resources when the human world is burning.
 
2012-12-12 05:44:50 PM

Walker: 'He sleeps with me, eats with me, showers with me, goes shopping with me': Owner of Darwin the Ikea monkey desperate to get her 'baby' back

B*tch is cray cray. She's a lawyer too. This explains how so many innocent people wind up in jail. They have lawyers like her.


She's a real estate lawyer. This explains why people buy property governed by an HOA.
 
2012-12-12 05:45:42 PM

Insatiable Jesus: Contents Under Pressure: The monkey is still a baby and can be rehabbed so that it fits in with other monkeys.



-------------------------------


I am so glad that you anthropomorphic people have your priorities straight. Monkey rehab? Really? What a brilliant use of our limited time and resources when the human world is burning.


Some would say that the money invested in rehab for the money might actually do something good... at least for the monkey. It's not like he'll take the rehab money and go buy a bottle of beer and a pack of smokes.
 
2012-12-12 05:46:15 PM
Yes, monkey-rehab. Humans farked-up this poor little animal, so it should be the responsibility of humans to fix it so that it can at least live with it's own kind.
 
2012-12-12 05:49:15 PM

Max Awesome: Humans farked-up this poor little animal, so it should be the responsibility of humans to fix it so that it can at least live with it's own kind


Good point. You are probably human, so I designate YOU to take care of that expense.

Start writing those checks man, what are you waiting for?
 
2012-12-12 05:49:58 PM
Let's cut down to the brass tacks here, man... How much for the monkey?
 
2012-12-12 05:58:33 PM

ariosto: You forgot to change accounts before posting your reply, FYI.


DirkTheDaring: Did you forget to switch to your alt?


Can't a Farker call himself out for arrogant stupidity without alt-suspicion these days?
 
2012-12-12 06:28:56 PM
The important question has yet to be answered:

Did they let Darwin keep the coat or not?

/simian style king, of all years
 
2012-12-12 06:51:29 PM

mark12A: I had a couple of Rhesus monkeys when I lived in the Philippines. Oh yeah, deys cute as a button when young, but damm, when they grow up they are mean, mean, attack machines. Prepetual two year old brats with nasty teeth. They cannot be pets. Period.


THIS exponent 10

I got this reply from a veterinarian on another board I visit:

"As a vet who has worked with other primates at zoos I can give you a few reasons:

-- monkeys are highly intelligent, long lived animals with complex social and emotional needs; they need to be with others of their own species to develop properly. Keeping them as a pet in a home will result in abnormal social and emotional development. Almost without exception monkeys kept as pets are emotionally disturbed individuals. They suffer from depression as well. It's not good for the monkey.

-- they can asymptomatically carry a variety of viral diseases that can be fatal to humans. Blood testing for these diseases isn't accurate enough to eliminate the risk. It's not good for the people around it.

-- they are susceptible to a variety of diseases that we can transfer to them -- a cold, the flu, etc.

--they all can deliver an EXTREMELY nasty bite. When they reach sexual maturity they can become extremely aggressive, and if they are raised as a pet their behavior and emotional development is grossly abnormal anyway, exacerbating the problem. Many species are strong enough to rip both of your arms off without much effort. There are plenty of publicized cases of attacks where a non human primate pet rips off a person's hands, face, and genitals. These areas are deliberately targeted -- think of a sociopathic, psychotic person that is many times as strong as you.

-- once the animal reaches sexual maturity and becomes too dangerous or too much to handle there is no place to re-home them. Zoos don't want primates that haven't been socialized from birth with their own kind. Rescue organizations can only take a few, and it is estimated that there are 15,000 kept as private pets in the US alone.

Not only should monkey ownership not be allowed, it should be criminal to do that to an intelligent, social relative of ours."


/monkey lady she crazy
//shelter care lady she anthropomorphize way too much
///why, no, I won't tell you what board it is
 
2012-12-12 07:04:57 PM
You want your monkey back? Don't break the farking law.
 
2012-12-12 07:17:42 PM

Insatiable Jesus: Contents Under Pressure: The monkey is still a baby and can be rehabbed so that it fits in with other monkeys.



-------------------------------


I am so glad that you anthropomorphic people have your priorities straight. Monkey rehab? Really? What a brilliant use of our limited time and resources when the human world is burning.


I used to work at a zoo and at an animal shelter and we got this hoary old argument regularly. What was interesting was that I would ask, "Oh, what sort of volunteer work do you do?" and they'd have no answer. I did get a lot of people who would ask me if I was a volunteer and other volunteers who worked with humans never dismissed what I did, but encouraged it.

People who do volunteer work are choosing how to spend their time. I think working for a monkey charity is more useful than attending a Raiders game, though both are an equally fine way to spend one's free time. These non-profits that take care of animals do fundraising with people who voluntarily donate money (and time). So, a computer magnate can build a 40 bedroom spread with a bowling alley and an indoor pool or they can donate money to a charity they like.

People who are truly generous of spirit don't do the "what about this other group" argument, because they know that there are many ways to contribute to the world, be it human, animal, or habitat and even doing one thing is of far greater value than sitting on your arse being the Great Social Critic.
 
2012-12-12 07:20:58 PM

BojanglesPaladin: Max Awesome: Humans farked-up this poor little animal, so it should be the responsibility of humans to fix it so that it can at least live with it's own kind

Good point. You are probably human, so I designate YOU to take care of that expense.

Start writing those checks man, what are you waiting for?


That's a good idea actually. I'll go donate to the sanctuary right now...
 
2012-12-12 07:26:13 PM
Done! Heres the link to the sanctuary's donation page:

http://www.indiegogo.com/projects/294104?c=home
 
2012-12-12 07:29:29 PM
Link


Darwin is going to live with Sweet Pea, an Olive Baboon that shows gentle mothering tendencies and loves to groom faux fur items left for her, soft plush toys (like in the video above)- and once helped raise a kitten in the barn. When she arrived at Story Book Farm, she was so bored she was pulling her fur out.
Darwin clings to his owner like a mother-but no human can compare to the care a maternal baboon can deliver to the little macaque- ( Also, I imagine the sanctuary will get a lot of donations with the publicity with Darwin's arrival - and hopefully it'll bring for a better home for all the animals)

It's like a Christmas miracle- and a happy story when you take the owners out of the story entirely. Really- they will not get him back and shouldn't get any more attention then they already have- they were fined for keeping a wild animal- the end. I hope Darwin's life at the sanctuary is better then at that house. There's something disturbing about a monkey in a diaper... I bet he's happy to be out of his crap sack.
 
2012-12-12 08:05:01 PM

Bathia_Mapes: Toronto doesn't allow people to own certain animals. That includes monkeys.

In an other article the woman said she lent the monkey to a friend of hers. It got loose and ended up in the IKEA parking lot.


Who lends monkeys? "Thanks for spotting me that monkey Ethel, I was a little short this cycle. I'll pay you back next time I'm in Bangladesh."
 
2012-12-12 08:08:05 PM

MorePeasPlease: ariosto: You forgot to change accounts before posting your reply, FYI.

DirkTheDaring: Did you forget to switch to your alt?

Can't a Farker call himself out for arrogant stupidity without alt-suspicion these days?


So how did putting yourself on ignore work out?
 
2012-12-12 08:08:32 PM
I don't know why, but this is the funniest thing I've seen in a long time.

weknowmemes.com
 
2012-12-12 08:11:14 PM
Perhaps they have something to hide? We should ask her and her monkey.
 
2012-12-12 08:12:52 PM
farm7.staticflickr.com

lonely baboon needs a friend with a pulse 
(Sweet Pea with toy chimp)
 
2012-12-12 08:32:29 PM

DirkTheDaring: So how did putting yourself on ignore work out?


Tell him it worked fine.
 
2012-12-12 08:40:47 PM
Anyone who refers to an animal as their "child" or themselves as the "parent" of that animal is too mentally deranged to own an animal.
 
2012-12-12 08:43:40 PM
Give the lady a full-grown adult male rhesus macaque and see how she does with it.

/Monkeys belong in forests and jungles and hotels in India...
 
2012-12-12 08:50:19 PM

whatshisname: Give the lady a full-grown adult male rhesus macaque and see how she does with it.


Not every woman is prepared for macaque, unless she's seen a cockatoo.
 
2012-12-12 09:23:20 PM

Tax Boy: whatshisname: Give the lady a full-grown adult male rhesus macaque and see how she does with it.

Not every woman is prepared for macaque, unless she's seen a cockatoo.


Magnificent!
 
2012-12-12 09:54:56 PM

MorePeasPlease: DirkTheDaring: So how did putting yourself on ignore work out?

Tell him it worked fine.


Hey, MorePeasPlease, I just wanted to tell you that MorePeasPlease asked me to let you know that putting yourself on ignore worked out just fine.
 
2012-12-12 10:55:12 PM
I'm not surprised. Most women want macaque back.
 
2012-12-12 10:56:44 PM

ka1axy: Curious: all that crap from the woman at the shelter about how the monkey would be able to express itself as a monkey and commune with the other monkeys is PC bullshiat.

they are going to keep in in a cage and hustle folks to pay for it.

Worst of all, they took his coat!


that is a nice coat.
 
2012-12-12 11:24:19 PM

DirkTheDaring: Hey, MorePeasPlease, I just wanted to tell you that MorePeasPlease asked me to let you know that putting yourself on ignore worked out just fine.


Thanks, but I read his post.
Unlike him, I don't pussy out and ignore words that might huwt my feewings.
 
2012-12-13 01:03:32 AM

Plant Rights Activist: Pretty sure the original article I read stated that monkeys were not allowed as pets in wherever this was



It was at an IKEA - they only allow mooses as pets there.
 
2012-12-13 02:43:23 AM

Plant Rights Activist: Pretty sure the original article I read stated that monkeys were not allowed as pets in wherever this was



You're correct.  Toronto does not allow monkeys to be kept as pets.
 
2012-12-13 04:03:10 PM

Max Awesome: That's a good idea actually. I'll go donate to the sanctuary right now...


Well Done. Glad that's handled.
 
2012-12-13 07:04:21 PM
sphotos-d.ak.fbcdn.net
 
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