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(Forbes)   Apparently, the secret to a popular weight loss drug is that it's hard to overeat when you're in an organ failure-induced coma   (forbes.com) divider line 77
    More: Fail, anti-obesity medication, induced coma  
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7698 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Dec 2012 at 9:43 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-12 08:30:25 AM
I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.
 
2012-12-12 09:44:57 AM
People pay for alli? But you can get oxen for free.
 
2012-12-12 09:45:27 AM
So that means it's working, right?
 
2012-12-12 09:47:25 AM
Eat more vegetables, don't cook them to death. Eat natural meats and not ones loaded with hormones and antibiotics. And lay off the bread and pasta. Don't eat anything that is prepackaged and full of salt and preservatives. Drop the soda phosphorus is a killer to the Liver!

AND FOR GOODNESS SAKES GET UP AND EXERCISE!!!

Its not that hard people....
 
2012-12-12 09:48:01 AM

gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.


Some guys in Chicago find that sexy!
 
2012-12-12 09:48:40 AM
You know that stupid "paleo diet"? I have a diet that is guaranteed to work: The Cambrian Diet. You are allowed to eat as much as you want as long as it's trilobites.
 
2012-12-12 09:49:24 AM

gambitsgirl: I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2.


Your friend has issues.
 
2012-12-12 09:51:34 AM

Honest Bender: People pay for alli? But you can get oxen for free.



Quiet, you.
 
2012-12-12 09:53:27 AM
the American public is a moran. year after farking year for the last what, 15 years every over-advertised weight loss miracle drug and birth control miracle is the subject of 1 800 LAWYER type commercials with 12 - 18 months. people die, their intestines are ruined, they are non longer able to have children, blah blah blah. over & over this happens yet we constantly have a new willing crop of nitwits that want to trade cash for lies. farking morans.
 
2012-12-12 09:53:40 AM

gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning.


That's probably not a personal trait you should advertise.
 
2012-12-12 09:54:20 AM

Cybernetic: gambitsgirl: I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2.

Your friend has issues.


Oh c'mon, she's dying to be a size 2.
 
2012-12-12 09:55:00 AM

Fluorescent Testicle: gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning.

That's probably not a personal trait you should advertise.


Crap
 
2012-12-12 09:55:11 AM

KrispyKritter: the American public is a moran. year after farking year for the last what, 15 years every over-advertised weight loss miracle drug and birth control miracle is the subject of 1 800 LAWYER type commercials with 12 - 18 months. people die, their intestines are ruined, they are non longer able to have children, blah blah blah. over & over this happens yet we constantly have a new willing crop of nitwits that want to trade cash for lies. farking morans.


Morans? Unable to have children? Such a tragedy...
 
2012-12-12 09:55:35 AM

Cybernetic: gambitsgirl: I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2.

Your friend has issues.


Indeed
 
2012-12-12 09:56:50 AM
But these cookies are FAT FREE!!!! FREE!
 
2012-12-12 09:58:30 AM

HailRobonia: You know that stupid "paleo diet"? I have a diet that is guaranteed to work: The Cambrian Diet. You are allowed to eat as much as you want as long as it's trilobites.


I must admit, I LOL'd at this.
 
2012-12-12 09:58:57 AM

Honest Bender: People pay for alli? But you can get oxen for free.


Love this comment! :)
 
2012-12-12 10:05:58 AM

gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.



I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.
 
2012-12-12 10:06:41 AM

Anthracite: Eat more vegetables, don't cook them to death. Eat natural meats and not ones loaded with hormones and antibiotics. And lay off the bread and pasta. Don't eat anything that is prepackaged and full of salt and preservatives. Drop the soda phosphorus is a killer to the Liver!

AND FOR GOODNESS SAKES GET UP AND EXERCISE!!!

Its not that hard people....


Too true. But lazy, fat people don't think it's their fault they're fat, it's hormones or genetics or some such b.s. I guess nobody told them that you don't get anything without working for it.
 
2012-12-12 10:08:58 AM

Sybarite: gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.


I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.


Moon shot....
 
2012-12-12 10:15:23 AM

Anthracite:
AND FOR GOODNESS SAKES GET UP AND EXERCISE!!!

Its not that hard people....


It is if you have bad joint inflammation and neuropathic pain.
 
2012-12-12 10:15:40 AM
Eliminating your ability to digest fat, which contains essential (essential to keep living that is) fatty acids was retarded from the beginning.

Simple caloric restriction is the worst way to lose weight without considering essential amino acids and fatty acids, and making sure your calorie restriction doesn't restrict the two macro nutrients that contain those important elements.

/hint - "whole grains" contain nothing that is essential to your health
 
2012-12-12 10:18:04 AM
home.comcast.net

Honey, there just ain't another way.
 
2012-12-12 10:20:13 AM

Sybarite: gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.


I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.


A new form of hydraulic transportation?
 
RJB
2012-12-12 10:20:35 AM

Sybarite: I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.


[tubgirl.jpg]
 
2012-12-12 10:20:42 AM
Am I bad for first seeing the submission as "organismic induced coma"?
 
2012-12-12 10:25:18 AM

jsteiner78: Eliminating your ability to digest fat, which contains essential (essential to keep living that is) fatty acids was retarded from the beginning.

Simple caloric restriction is the worst way to lose weight without considering essential amino acids and fatty acids, and making sure your calorie restriction doesn't restrict the two macro nutrients that contain those important elements.

/hint - "whole grains" contain nothing that is essential to your health


A reasonable well balanced diet and moderate exercise (walking has been shown to be the best form) is the one and only key to weight loss and maintenance. The best diets are always based on the 1500 kcal American Diabetic Association Diet. Any other is just fad. And you're wrong about whole grains. They do contain essential vitamins and minerals; they are also an excellent source of unrefined complex carbohydrates (the good kind). It think you may have meant refined grains, which strips away most of the nutrients.
 
2012-12-12 10:31:08 AM

Anthracite: Eat more vegetables, don't cook them to death. Eat natural meats and not ones loaded with hormones and antibiotics. And lay off the bread and pasta. Don't eat anything that is prepackaged and full of salt and preservatives. Drop the soda phosphorus is a killer to the Liver!

AND FOR GOODNESS SAKES GET UP AND EXERCISE!!!

Its not that hard people....


that's not the reason sodas are bad for you
 
2012-12-12 10:41:05 AM

Sybarite: gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.


I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.


WMD?
Full system cleanse?
Sheets you just throw away instead of actually trying to clean them?
 
2012-12-12 10:42:00 AM

nmemkha: Sybarite: gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.


I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.

A new form of hydraulic transportation?


Simply awesome
 
2012-12-12 10:48:34 AM

Sybarite: gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.


I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.


Depends...
 
2012-12-12 10:49:07 AM
Someone said, "but you can get oxen for free" What is oxen? The only oxen I know of are draft animals.....
 
2012-12-12 10:49:58 AM

xcheopis: Anthracite:
AND FOR GOODNESS SAKES GET UP AND EXERCISE!!!

Its not that hard people....

It is if you have bad joint inflammation and neuropathic pain.


Aquatic exercise is great for those with joint and mobility issues. Unless you are in a coma, there is always something you can do.
 
2012-12-12 10:54:37 AM

namegoeshere: xcheopis: Anthracite:
AND FOR GOODNESS SAKES GET UP AND EXERCISE!!!

Its not that hard people....

It is if you have bad joint inflammation and neuropathic pain.

Aquatic exercise is great for those with joint and mobility issues. Unless you are in a coma, there is always something you can do.

Sorry, the personal swimming pools are being renovated.
 
2012-12-12 10:54:37 AM
Probably referring to "Oxi" short for Oxidodo the cocaine derivative made with gasoline...oh yeah, I'll take my chances in the GYM
 
2012-12-12 11:02:45 AM

xcheopis: Sorry, the personal swimming pools are being renovated.


I have bone spurs and arthritis as well as some tendon problems in my feet that have prevented me from running for the past year. So I started focusing on my diet alone for weight loss (using a web site like "my fitness pal") and dropped 2 pounds / week like clockwork. It takes dedication, commitment, and sacrifice at first, but after a week or two you'll be used to it. And if you don't have the ability to follow something like that then you either just don't want to lose weight or you have an eating disorder and require counseling. It is really as simple as people say it is. Unless you're happier making excuses... which it kinda sounds like.
 
2012-12-12 11:08:00 AM

xcheopis: namegoeshere: xcheopis: Anthracite:
AND FOR GOODNESS SAKES GET UP AND EXERCISE!!!

Its not that hard people....

It is if you have bad joint inflammation and neuropathic pain.

Aquatic exercise is great for those with joint and mobility issues. Unless you are in a coma, there is always something you can do.
Sorry, the personal swimming pools are being renovated.


Q: How many passive aggressives does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: Stupid lightbulb! Well, I guess we'll just have to sit here in the dark, now won't we?
 
2012-12-12 11:10:41 AM

WinoRhino: xcheopis: Sorry, the personal swimming pools are being renovated.

I have bone spurs and arthritis as well as some tendon problems in my feet that have prevented me from running for the past year. So I started focusing on my diet alone for weight loss (using a web site like "my fitness pal") and dropped 2 pounds / week like clockwork. It takes dedication, commitment, and sacrifice at first, but after a week or two you'll be used to it. And if you don't have the ability to follow something like that then you either just don't want to lose weight or you have an eating disorder and require counseling. It is really as simple as people say it is. Unless you're happier making excuses... which it kinda sounds like.


Oh, up yers with your logic and reasoning and facts. That gingerbread cake FORCED me to eat it, with cream no less, and that's all there is to it!

/dammit. You're right.
//still not happy about it!
 
2012-12-12 11:15:02 AM

NeoBad: Someone said, "but you can get oxen for free" What is oxen? The only oxen I know of are draft animals.....


notsureifserious.jpg

but what the hell, I'm bored, so just in case....here ya go
 
2012-12-12 11:22:56 AM

Sybarite: gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.


I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.


finish it off with a half dozen granny smith apples and you have the recipe for an explosive good time
 
2012-12-12 11:23:27 AM

WinoRhino: xcheopis: Sorry, the personal swimming pools are being renovated.

I have bone spurs and arthritis as well as some tendon problems in my feet that have prevented me from running for the past year. So I started focusing on my diet alone for weight loss (using a web site like "my fitness pal") and dropped 2 pounds / week like clockwork. It takes dedication, commitment, and sacrifice at first, but after a week or two you'll be used to it. And if you don't have the ability to follow something like that then you either just don't want to lose weight or you have an eating disorder and require counseling. It is really as simple as people say it is. Unless you're happier making excuses... which it kinda sounds like.

Oh, I'm fine random internet stranger thank you for your concern. I do have a lot of neighbors, though, who are elderly, poor, and with severe mobility issues. I'm sure they also appreciate your concern and dedication and I'll be sure to pass that along the next time I'm helping deliver meds.
 
2012-12-12 11:25:44 AM
Who cares?
If it works, it works.

...Then again, it's probably prescription only, and therefore a pain in the ass to get.
 
2012-12-12 11:29:12 AM

doczoidberg: Who cares?
If it works, it works.

...Then again, it's probably prescription only, and therefore a pain in the ass to get.


No, I think the "pain in the ass" bit is a feature.
 
2012-12-12 11:34:27 AM

doczoidberg: Who cares?
If it works, it works.

...Then again, it's probably prescription only, and therefore a pain in the ass to get.


Stocked at Walmart and all other intelligence lacking establishments.
 
2012-12-12 11:36:18 AM

gambitsgirl: Sybarite: gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.


I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.

WMD?
Full system cleanse?
Sheets you just throw away instead of actually trying to clean them?


GG, you are totally cracking me up! I'm hysterical laughing over here.
 
2012-12-12 11:40:10 AM

WinoRhino: xcheopis: Sorry, the personal swimming pools are being renovated.

I have bone spurs and arthritis as well as some tendon problems in my feet that have prevented me from running for the past year. So I started focusing on my diet alone for weight loss (using a web site like "my fitness pal") and dropped 2 pounds / week like clockwork. It takes dedication, commitment, and sacrifice at first, but after a week or two you'll be used to it. And if you don't have the ability to follow something like that then you either just don't want to lose weight or you have an eating disorder and require counseling. It is really as simple as people say it is. Unless you're happier making excuses... which it kinda sounds like.


Wow, sorry to hear about your foot travails; I'm hoping you are getting those surgically corrected or through rehab, or combo? I just hope you can get a lot of mobility back!
 
2012-12-12 11:43:07 AM
 
2012-12-12 11:45:05 AM

HailRobonia: You know that stupid "paleo diet"? I have a diet that is guaranteed to work: The Cambrian Diet. You are allowed to eat as much as you want as long as it's trilobites.


Hey look everyone, this idiot doesn't believe in evolution!

/points and laughs
 
2012-12-12 11:46:56 AM

unfarkingbelievable: gambitsgirl: Sybarite: gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.


I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.

WMD?
Full system cleanse?
Sheets you just throw away instead of actually trying to clean them?

GG, you are totally cracking me up! I'm hysterical laughing over here.


And I'm totally looking at option 2 as I don't want to spend the time doing the Lemonaide body cleanse. I could take Alli and eat Wow!!! chips for a week! I need to go see if I have a tent as I don't intend living inside that week. And possibly the week after also.

/// O_O
 
2012-12-12 11:54:07 AM

AbiNormal: Alli Side Effects In Layman's Terms


I actually physically snorted reading that I laughed so hard. This led her on a romantic weekend with an executive-who was-indeed-hot and a bucket of Bojangles. And waking in a POOL of orange oil with him asleep in the bed. Delimas dilemas.

But she's a size 2!

Odd she can't keep a man.
 
2012-12-12 12:05:18 PM

AbiNormal: Alli Side Effects In Layman's Terms


Oh. My. God. This is printed as a warning. On the package:

You may feel an urgent need to go to the bathroom. Until you have a sense of any treatment effects, it's probably a smart idea to wear dark pants, and bring a change of clothes with you to work.

They're telling you, right out, that you will not just stripe your undies occasionally, but will in fact shiat through your clothing. In public.

And people do this to themselves on purpose??
 
2012-12-12 12:05:56 PM

unfarkingbelievable: Wow, sorry to hear about your foot travails; I'm hoping you are getting those surgically corrected or through rehab, or combo? I just hope you can get a lot of mobility back!


Thanks! Been in physical therapy since June and things are looking up. I can walk without pain now and recently stopped wearing the stretching boot thingy to bed, but still require the air-cast immobilizing thing throughout the day. I'll be back to my old self in a couple months. Or was your post sarcastic?
 
2012-12-12 12:10:08 PM

doczoidberg: Who cares?
If it works, it works.

...Then again, it's probably prescription only, and therefore a pain in the ass to get.


Human medical advice from Zoidberg. Seems legit.
 
2012-12-12 12:11:05 PM

namegoeshere: AbiNormal: Alli Side Effects In Layman's Terms

Oh. My. God. This is printed as a warning. On the package:

You may feel an urgent need to go to the bathroom. Until you have a sense of any treatment effects, it's probably a smart idea to wear dark pants, and bring a change of clothes with you to work.

They're telling you, right out, that you will not just stripe your undies occasionally, but will in fact shiat through your clothing. In public.

And people do this to themselves on purpose??


AND she shiat her cloth car seats twice. Her gay-friend-hairdresser-sidepiece would sit and complain about the "treatment effects" in HIS life. O_O


/I went out with them once. Ended in them SNORTING ambien and me sneaking the fark out and never going back. I kept asking them why not just TAKE the ambien. Side effects of snorting it (wtf erratic behavior) combind with treatment affects of Alli (figure it out) = me realizing club going was NOT the way I was going to meet people/have fun.
 
2012-12-12 12:12:17 PM

WinoRhino: unfarkingbelievable: Wow, sorry to hear about your foot travails; I'm hoping you are getting those surgically corrected or through rehab, or combo? I just hope you can get a lot of mobility back!

Thanks! Been in physical therapy since June and things are looking up. I can walk without pain now and recently stopped wearing the stretching boot thingy to bed, but still require the air-cast immobilizing thing throughout the day. I'll be back to my old self in a couple months. Or was your post sarcastic?


No, not sarcastic. Even though I love so snark on Fark, when I read about people going through medical issues, I feel intense empathy. That said, I am very glad to hear you are indeed on the mend. And I hope you can run, jump and frolic to your heart's content soon. Cheers!
 
2012-12-12 12:13:51 PM

gambitsgirl: unfarkingbelievable: gambitsgirl: Sybarite: gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.


I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.

WMD?
Full system cleanse?
Sheets you just throw away instead of actually trying to clean them?

GG, you are totally cracking me up! I'm hysterical laughing over here.

And I'm totally looking at option 2 as I don't want to spend the time doing the Lemonaide body cleanse. I could take Alli and eat Wow!!! chips for a week! I need to go see if I have a tent as I don't intend living inside that week. And possibly the week after also.

/// O_O


Would covering it all in disposable Saran wrap help? :)
 
2012-12-12 12:16:33 PM

gambitsgirl: Cybernetic: gambitsgirl:

I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2.

Your friend has issues.

Indeed


Size 2 is way too skeletal for me. Between 6 - 16 works for me, depending on the woman's height, bone structure, personality and whatever else I feel like factoring in. And people I like and especially who also like me are always more attractive then those I can't stand.

One of my biggest regrets is being too crazy for Sarah in Chicago. I've got no idea what her dress size or measurements were was but she looked to be about 50 or so pounds overweight: firstly she really was big-boned (her wrists & ankles were almost twice the size of mine), she was naturally mesomorphic enough to make a good football player (and could have snapped me like pencil), and her adipose tissue was very well arranged -- just a larger version of the "hourglass figure." Her waist nipped in at the sides, her belly was just a little soft, and her boobs, butt and thighs were in proportion to her waist. She was kinda fat, she could have lost a few pounds and it wouldn't hurt her any, but she was also fun-loving, friendly and horny as all get-out. You might have to be a little careful in how you dress with a build like that, some things really are cut to flatter an anorect and make everybody else look funny, but stark naked this gal turned me ON. She was a whole lotta woman.

And she didn't poop herself the whole weekend I was there.
 
2012-12-12 12:18:49 PM

gambitsgirl: namegoeshere: AbiNormal: Alli Side Effects In Layman's Terms

Oh. My. God. This is printed as a warning. On the package:

You may feel an urgent need to go to the bathroom. Until you have a sense of any treatment effects, it's probably a smart idea to wear dark pants, and bring a change of clothes with you to work.

They're telling you, right out, that you will not just stripe your undies occasionally, but will in fact shiat through your clothing. In public.

And people do this to themselves on purpose??

AND she shiat her cloth car seats twice. Her gay-friend-hairdresser-sidepiece would sit and complain about the "treatment effects" in HIS life. O_O


/I went out with them once. Ended in them SNORTING ambien and me sneaking the fark out and never going back. I kept asking them why not just TAKE the ambien. Side effects of snorting it (wtf erratic behavior) combind with treatment affects of Alli (figure it out) = me realizing club going was NOT the way I was going to meet people/have fun.


Ambien + Alli. Hmmm... so you don't remember where you left your random piles of oily shiat-goo?

Chubby but sane is better than skinny but oily-bat-shiat-running-down-your-legs farking nuts, I'm thinking.
 
2012-12-12 12:19:54 PM

unfarkingbelievable: gambitsgirl: unfarkingbelievable: gambitsgirl: Sybarite: gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.


I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.

WMD?
Full system cleanse?
Sheets you just throw away instead of actually trying to clean them?

GG, you are totally cracking me up! I'm hysterical laughing over here.

And I'm totally looking at option 2 as I don't want to spend the time doing the Lemonaide body cleanse. I could take Alli and eat Wow!!! chips for a week! I need to go see if I have a tent as I don't intend living inside that week. And possibly the week after also.

/// O_O

Would covering it all in disposable Saran wrap help? :)


As it will still flow to the heaviest indented part of the bed I would think that would just raise the splatter level numbers far greater than good sheets (poor quality sheets don't soak as much up).

I think the "wait for him to fall asleep and slip into Depends" method would ultimately be least embarrassing. :-/
 
2012-12-12 12:20:54 PM

The One True TheDavid: And she didn't poop herself the whole weekend I was there.


This made me LOL a lot and be very glad to have control of my bowels.
 
2012-12-12 12:21:37 PM

The One True TheDavid: gambitsgirl: Cybernetic: gambitsgirl:

I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2.

Your friend has issues.

Indeed

Size 2 is way too skeletal for me. Between 6 - 16 works for me, depending on the woman's height, bone structure, personality and whatever else I feel like factoring in. And people I like and especially who also like me are always more attractive then those I can't stand.

One of my biggest regrets is being too crazy for Sarah in Chicago. I've got no idea what her dress size or measurements were was but she looked to be about 50 or so pounds overweight: firstly she really was big-boned (her wrists & ankles were almost twice the size of mine), she was naturally mesomorphic enough to make a good football player (and could have snapped me like pencil), and her adipose tissue was very well arranged -- just a larger version of the "hourglass figure." Her waist nipped in at the sides, her belly was just a little soft, and her boobs, butt and thighs were in proportion to her waist. She was kinda fat, she could have lost a few pounds and it wouldn't hurt her any, but she was also fun-loving, friendly and horny as all get-out. You might have to be a little careful in how you dress with a build like that, some things really are cut to flatter an anorect and make everybody else look funny, but stark naked this gal turned me ON. She was a whole lotta woman.

And she didn't poop herself the whole weekend I was there.


WOW!!!! That made me tingly. O_O.
 
2012-12-12 12:23:41 PM

namegoeshere: gambitsgirl: namegoeshere: AbiNormal: Alli Side Effects In Layman's Terms

Oh. My. God. This is printed as a warning. On the package:

You may feel an urgent need to go to the bathroom. Until you have a sense of any treatment effects, it's probably a smart idea to wear dark pants, and bring a change of clothes with you to work.

They're telling you, right out, that you will not just stripe your undies occasionally, but will in fact shiat through your clothing. In public.

And people do this to themselves on purpose??

AND she shiat her cloth car seats twice. Her gay-friend-hairdresser-sidepiece would sit and complain about the "treatment effects" in HIS life. O_O


/I went out with them once. Ended in them SNORTING ambien and me sneaking the fark out and never going back. I kept asking them why not just TAKE the ambien. Side effects of snorting it (wtf erratic behavior) combind with treatment affects of Alli (figure it out) = me realizing club going was NOT the way I was going to meet people/have fun.

Ambien + Alli. Hmmm... so you don't remember where you left your random piles of oily shiat-goo?

Chubby but sane is better than skinny but oily-bat-shiat-running-down-your-legs farking nuts, I'm thinking.


Like I said, second dates seem to be a problem for her. I haven't seen her for 4 years*

*this is also the chick who told me to leave my dying husband since "I was young and could move on".
 
2012-12-12 12:48:46 PM
People. Want to lose weight? Here's the secret:

1. Weigh Yourself every morning.
2. Write down everything you eat.
3. Blog those two numbers, make it a facebook status, email it to somebody whop knows your goals and keeps you accountable, whatever works.
4. Exercise, but don't expect it to make any difference in how much weight you lose. It will however give you time to reflect on your goals and something to do other than eating too much crap.

/Did this for 6 months and lost 50 pounds, have kept it off for two years.
/no comas, no pools of oil.
 
2012-12-12 01:29:45 PM
Go be in a coma someplace else!
 
2012-12-12 01:31:07 PM
I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.

You can be ready for your colonoscopy in 6 hours.
 
2012-12-12 01:57:48 PM
What's the best way to prepare for taking Alli?

Depends.
 
2012-12-12 02:12:15 PM

Sybarite: gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.


I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.


"It's like eating a spoonful of Drano; sure, it'll clean you out, but it'll leave you hollow inside."

www.finger-jam.co.uk
 
2012-12-12 02:29:23 PM

gambitsgirl: unfarkingbelievable: gambitsgirl: unfarkingbelievable: gambitsgirl: Sybarite: gambitsgirl: I makes you poop orange liquid uncontrollably and without warning. It was never a good idea. I had a friend stay very thin on it but she crapped herself regularly. She said it was worth it to be a size 2. I'm pretty sure the side affect would be frowned upon by most mates during sexy time. That's a BIG oops.


I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.

WMD?
Full system cleanse?
Sheets you just throw away instead of actually trying to clean them?

GG, you are totally cracking me up! I'm hysterical laughing over here.

And I'm totally looking at option 2 as I don't want to spend the time doing the Lemonaide body cleanse. I could take Alli and eat Wow!!! chips for a week! I need to go see if I have a tent as I don't intend living inside that week. And possibly the week after also.

/// O_O

Would covering it all in disposable Saran wrap help? :)

As it will still flow to the heaviest indented part of the bed I would think that would just raise the splatter level numbers far greater than good sheets (poor quality sheets don't soak as much up).

I think the "wait for him to fall asleep and slip into Depends" method would ultimately be least embarrassing. :-/


But wait! Maybe you could construct a drain and basin for it to all flow into!

/ok, ok, enough I know. But I haven't laughed this hard in awhile. And I'm having fun being scatologically silly.
 
2012-12-12 02:38:09 PM

Faust_Motel: People. Want to lose weight? Here's the secret:

1. Weigh Yourself every morning.
2. Write down everything you eat.
3. Blog those two numbers, make it a facebook status, email it to somebody whop knows your goals and keeps you accountable, whatever works.
4. Exercise, but don't expect it to make any difference in how much weight you lose. It will however give you time to reflect on your goals and something to do other than eating too much crap.

/Did this for 6 months and lost 50 pounds, have kept it off for two years.
/no comas, no pools of oil.


Even more: Expect exercise to increase your weight, sometimes dramatically, weight lifting even more so. Take a week off every so often and it'll drop again. Your body retains more water, uses the food it gets more efficiently, and craves more calories, making it difficult to outright drop weight. If that number bothers you, then for god's sake get some freaking calipers and measure your body fat %, don't moan about that one meaningless weight number like it's the end all and be all of how good you look.
 
2012-12-12 03:09:36 PM
what about Dexedrine? is that still good for weight loss?
 
2012-12-12 04:23:01 PM

Sybarite: I wonder what would happen if you popped a couple of Alli and then ate a whole bag of Olestra chips.


upload.wikimedia.org
Listen, this is gonna be one hell of a bowel movement. Afterwards he'll be lucky if he has any bones left!
 
2012-12-12 09:14:44 PM

gambitsgirl: The One True TheDavid:

And she didn't poop herself the whole weekend I was there.

WOW!!!! That made me tingly. O_O.


I looked at your profile. That guy next to you makes me look like something the cat threw up. What good does a sense of humor get ME?!?
 
2012-12-12 10:59:51 PM

doczoidberg: ...Then again, it's probably prescription only, and therefore a pain in the ass to get.


You can buy it over the counter at any drugstore.
 
2012-12-13 08:30:33 AM
Well, fark my luck. I just bought the alli starter kit at walgreen's yesterday.
 
2012-12-13 05:03:43 PM
Burn more calories than you consume and you will lose weight. It's simple math. You either eat less, or exercise more.

/It's working for me.
//Running 20km a week gives me ample room for beer and hot wings.
///There's 33lbs less of me, and my internal organs still work.
 
2012-12-13 05:04:39 PM

xcheopis: namegoeshere: xcheopis: Anthracite:
AND FOR GOODNESS SAKES GET UP AND EXERCISE!!!

Its not that hard people....

It is if you have bad joint inflammation and neuropathic pain.

Aquatic exercise is great for those with joint and mobility issues. Unless you are in a coma, there is always something you can do.
Sorry, the personal swimming pools are being renovated.


So eat less, fatty.
 
2012-12-13 06:25:32 PM
Here ya go, gambitsgirl. For posterior posterity:
www-personal.umich.edu
 
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