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(Sun News Network)   Ottawa, Ontario storefront window unveils "50 Shades of Grey" Barbie   (sunnewsnetwork.ca) divider line 59
    More: Weird, Ottawa, adult stores, election promise, sex positions, Sun News, mass protests  
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16726 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Dec 2012 at 1:47 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-12 12:33:25 AM
Ken and Ken and Barbie and Barbie engaged in oral, anal sex and other shenanigans.

How can you tell when a pair of dolls with no genitals are having anal sex?
 
2012-12-12 01:49:28 AM

fusillade762: Ken and Ken and Barbie and Barbie engaged in oral, anal sex and other shenanigans.

How can you tell when a pair of dolls with no genitals are having anal sex?


When you buy the Anal Sex playset with extra lube.
 
2012-12-12 01:55:12 AM

WTF Indeed: fusillade762: Ken and Ken and Barbie and Barbie engaged in oral, anal sex and other shenanigans.

How can you tell when a pair of dolls with no genitals are having anal sex?

When you buy the Anal Sex playset with extra lube.


This is true- its even a playset from the Barbie I can be series. This one you have to buy from the backroom- Its I can be an anal sex queen set.
 
2012-12-12 01:56:08 AM
animatedviews.com
 
2012-12-12 01:56:12 AM
What the fark is the appeal of this book again? I tried reading just a review and the reviewer wasn't even able to complete it, it was so terrible.

/Don't leave your buttplugs for your non-lifestyle maid to clean you shiatbag
//Only thing I remember from that review
 
2012-12-12 01:58:38 AM
You're supposed to clean the buttplugs?

hmm.....
 
2012-12-12 01:59:43 AM
Well, the first time my town shows up on Fark that I've noticed, and it has to be fifty shades doesn't it.
 
2012-12-12 02:00:31 AM

Durga: Well, the first time my town shows up on Fark that I've noticed, and it has to be fifty shades doesn't it.


But Canadians do the kinky stuff so well!
 
2012-12-12 02:01:39 AM
Now, I know not everyone can afford a Realdoll, but this is stupid...
 
2012-12-12 02:01:53 AM

Mr. Eugenides: Durga: Well, the first time my town shows up on Fark that I've noticed, and it has to be fifty shades doesn't it.

But Canadians do the kinky stuff so well!


I know, my wife used to be a Catholic school girl. Canadian and previously repressed!
 
2012-12-12 02:04:03 AM
Mods? No, JUST NO!
 
2012-12-12 02:06:49 AM
www.movieforums.com

On the job!

/obscure?
//I hope not
///Slashies!
 
2012-12-12 02:07:08 AM

Durga: Mr. Eugenides: Durga: Well, the first time my town shows up on Fark that I've noticed, and it has to be fifty shades doesn't it.

But Canadians do the kinky stuff so well!

I know, my wife used to be a Catholic school girl. Canadian and previously repressed!


I hate you... know this... lucky bastard...
 
2012-12-12 02:11:05 AM
But what bothers area resident Shannon Lee Mannion is the effect its going to have on young children.

Uh, I don't want to bother you even more, Shannon Lee Mannion, but me and my little friends were torturing our Barbies long before "50 Shades of Grey" was even a twinkle in it's creator's somewhat uninspired eye. And making them have all kinds of perverted sex (sometimes with my plastic horses), and other forms of unnatural Barbie deviance.

We mostly turned out okay. Well, except that I'm posting on Fark.
 
2012-12-12 02:12:37 AM
FTFA
"We're a sex shop in the gay village, so community standards are going to be different here," said Lockhart. "They're only dolls. People who live in the neighbourhood can talk to us if they're offended by it, but we haven't had many complaints."
You'renothelping jpeg
 
2012-12-12 02:18:30 AM

Gyrfalcon: And making them have all kinds of perverted sex (sometimes with my plastic horses), and other forms of unnatural Barbie deviance.


HA!. You have no idea what I had barbie and gi joe, sometimes action jackson also doing in the 70's.
It was even better when gi joe got his kung fu grip .
Fanned and Favd
 
2012-12-12 02:28:08 AM
Yay Bank Street!

Protip: No happy endings at the asian massage place across the stret.
 
2012-12-12 02:29:07 AM
Street. Doh.
 
2012-12-12 02:32:37 AM

Omahawg: You're supposed to clean the buttplugs?

hmm.....


If you don't know that I am taking my toy's and going home, the easier way is to put a condom on them before using and change the condoms before reusing.
 
2012-12-12 02:42:55 AM
We have a Shades of Grey Boutique here in Edmonton. It's been there for a long time. I wonder how many people go in there now expecting it to be, erm, a different type of store.

t2.gstatic.com
 
2012-12-12 02:43:49 AM

Gyrfalcon: But what bothers area resident Shannon Lee Mannion is the effect its going to have on young children.

Uh, I don't want to bother you even more, Shannon Lee Mannion, but me and my little friends were torturing our Barbies long before "50 Shades of Grey" was even a twinkle in it's creator's somewhat uninspired eye. And making them have all kinds of perverted sex (sometimes with my plastic horses), and other forms of unnatural Barbie deviance.

We mostly turned out okay. Well, except that I'm posting on Fark.


I hated Barbie when I was a kid so I used to steal my little neighbour's dolls and torture her by making her watch while I stripped the Barbies naked, bent them over and then fired lego pieces up their arses with a slingshot. 

Ah, happy days.
 
2012-12-12 02:46:02 AM

drjekel_mrhyde: FTFA
"We're a sex shop in the gay village, so community standards are going to be different here," said Lockhart. "They're only dolls. People who live in the neighbourhood can talk to us if they're offended by it, but we haven't had many complaints."
You'renothelping jpeg


To be fair, Lockhart didn't say precisely how much lower gay community standards are compared to non-gay community standards.
 
2012-12-12 02:48:47 AM

tinfoil-hat maggie: If you don't know that I am taking my toy's and going home, the easier way is to put a condom on them before using and change the condoms before reusing.


Mind if I quote that and remind everyone to play safe ?
 
2012-12-12 02:53:44 AM

Gyrfalcon: But what bothers area resident Shannon Lee Mannion is the effect its going to have on young children.

Uh, I don't want to bother you even more, Shannon Lee Mannion, but me and my little friends were torturing our Barbies long before "50 Shades of Grey" was even a twinkle in it's creator's somewhat uninspired eye. And making them have all kinds of perverted sex (sometimes with my plastic horses), and other forms of unnatural Barbie deviance.

We mostly turned out okay. Well, except that I'm posting on Fark.


I used to tie my plastic dolls behind my tricycle and later my bike and their faces and well most everything would rub off. I guess i was a sick child : )
 
2012-12-12 02:56:28 AM

alienated: tinfoil-hat maggie: If you don't know that I am taking my toy's and going home, the easier way is to put a condom on them before using and change the condoms before reusing.

Mind if I quote that and remind everyone to play safe ?


Not at all everyone should play safe. Also the world would probably be a happier place if everyone played : )
 
2012-12-12 03:10:16 AM

tinfoil-hat maggie: alienated: tinfoil-hat maggie: If you don't know that I am taking my toy's and going home, the easier way is to put a condom on them before using and change the condoms before reusing.

Mind if I quote that and remind everyone to play safe ?

Not at all everyone should play safe. Also the world would probably be a happier place if everyone played : )


Indeed.
 
2012-12-12 03:42:11 AM

alienated: tinfoil-hat maggie: alienated: tinfoil-hat maggie: If you don't know that I am taking my toy's and going home, the easier way is to put a condom on them before using and change the condoms before reusing.

Mind if I quote that and remind everyone to play safe ?

Not at all everyone should play safe. Also the world would probably be a happier place if everyone played : )

Indeed.


Just so you know I've had you favorited for a while now : )
Happy Farking and Happy Holiday's : )
 
2012-12-12 03:54:29 AM

tinfoil-hat maggie: alienated: tinfoil-hat maggie: alienated: tinfoil-hat maggie: If you don't know that I am taking my toy's and going home, the easier way is to put a condom on them before using and change the condoms before reusing.

Mind if I quote that and remind everyone to play safe ?

Not at all everyone should play safe. Also the world would probably be a happier place if everyone played : )

Indeed.

Just so you know I've had you favorited for a while now : )
Happy Farking and Happy Holiday's : )


DAMMIT! I keep leaving and some folks keep bringing me back in . There must be a contest. I thank you- do you have a charity that I could donate to on your behalf ? EIP. Be well green colour faved friend
 
2012-12-12 03:58:24 AM

tinfoil-hat maggie: Gyrfalcon: But what bothers area resident Shannon Lee Mannion is the effect its going to have on young children.

Uh, I don't want to bother you even more, Shannon Lee Mannion, but me and my little friends were torturing our Barbies long before "50 Shades of Grey" was even a twinkle in it's creator's somewhat uninspired eye. And making them have all kinds of perverted sex (sometimes with my plastic horses), and other forms of unnatural Barbie deviance.

We mostly turned out okay. Well, except that I'm posting on Fark.

I used to tie my plastic dolls behind my tricycle and later my bike and their faces and well most everything would rub off. I guess i was a sick child : )


We used to light army men on fire and drip molten, flaming plastic onto bugs.
 
2012-12-12 04:08:30 AM

alienated: tinfoil-hat maggie: alienated: tinfoil-hat maggie: alienated: tinfoil-hat maggie: If you don't know that I am taking my toy's and going home, the easier way is to put a condom on them before using and change the condoms before reusing.

Mind if I quote that and remind everyone to play safe ?

Not at all everyone should play safe. Also the world would probably be a happier place if everyone played : )

Indeed.

Just so you know I've had you favorited for a while now : )
Happy Farking and Happy Holiday's : )

DAMMIT! I keep leaving and some folks keep bringing me back in . There must be a contest. I thank you- do you have a charity that I could donate to on your behalf ? EIP. Be well green colour faved friend


Opp's sorry, um any LGBT groups, um hell there's a lot of good orgs out there of every kind you're choice, I just felt like giving my first TF sponsorship so ya you could say you broke my cherry ; )
 
2012-12-12 04:11:32 AM

fusillade762: tinfoil-hat maggie: Gyrfalcon: But what bothers area resident Shannon Lee Mannion is the effect its going to have on young children.

Uh, I don't want to bother you even more, Shannon Lee Mannion, but me and my little friends were torturing our Barbies long before "50 Shades of Grey" was even a twinkle in it's creator's somewhat uninspired eye. And making them have all kinds of perverted sex (sometimes with my plastic horses), and other forms of unnatural Barbie deviance.

We mostly turned out okay. Well, except that I'm posting on Fark.

I used to tie my plastic dolls behind my tricycle and later my bike and their faces and well most everything would rub off. I guess i was a sick child : )

We used to light army men on fire and drip molten, flaming plastic onto bugs.


That sounds kinda fun but why would you hurt the pretty bugs ?
/Although I'm guessing it was sorta cool even though....
 
2012-12-12 04:30:59 AM

tinfoil-hat maggie: Opp's sorry, um any LGBT groups, um hell there's a lot of good orgs out there of every kind you're choice, I just felt like giving my first TF sponsorship so ya you could say you broke my cherry ; )


I know of a few. will do, and umm... thanks that said -cherry will blossom well. I'll take Double Entendres for a Thousand, Alex. ;)
 
2012-12-12 04:41:59 AM

tinfoil-hat maggie: We used to light army men on fire and drip molten, flaming plastic onto bugs.

That sounds kinda fun but why would you hurt the pretty bugs ?
/Although I'm guessing it was sorta cool even though....


Mainly slugs, so not really "pretty" bugs. And I knew plenty of people who liked to pour salt on them. Not sure which is crueler, though. Also did the "fry ants with a magnifying glass" thing once or twice. Had a friend who thought it was hysterical to blow up grasshoppers with firecrackers.

Thankfully that thoughtlessly sadistic period of my childhood didn't last long.
 
2012-12-12 04:48:54 AM

alienated: tinfoil-hat maggie: Opp's sorry, um any LGBT groups, um hell there's a lot of good orgs out there of every kind you're choice, I just felt like giving my first TF sponsorship so ya you could say you broke my cherry ; )

I know of a few. will do, and umm... thanks that said -cherry will blossom well. I'll take Double Entendres for a Thousand, Alex. ;)


Yea, things, stars and such are coming into alignment finally. And yea,,It's still something I wish I never had to go through, although I have so much love and support now. anyway it seems you know me well enough if you ever wanna talk off fark eip .
 
2012-12-12 04:53:59 AM

tinfoil-hat maggie: Omahawg: You're supposed to clean the buttplugs?

hmm.....

If you don't know that I am taking my toy's and going home, the easier way is to put a condom on them before using and change the condoms before reusing.


pics or it's all lies! lies, I tellya! LIES
 
2012-12-12 04:58:35 AM

fusillade762: tinfoil-hat maggie: We used to light army men on fire and drip molten, flaming plastic onto bugs.

That sounds kinda fun but why would you hurt the pretty bugs ?
/Although I'm guessing it was sorta cool even though....

Mainly slugs, so not really "pretty" bugs. And I knew plenty of people who liked to pour salt on them. Not sure which is crueler, though. Also did the "fry ants with a magnifying glass" thing once or twice. Had a friend who thought it was hysterical to blow up grasshoppers with firecrackers.

Thankfully that thoughtlessly sadistic period of my childhood didn't last long.


You're just trying to confuse me aren't you slugs aren't bugs, but anyway I hate to say it but I'm curious about the results of dripping melting plastic on slugs.
32 flavors and then some
 
2012-12-12 05:02:57 AM

Omahawg: tinfoil-hat maggie: Omahawg: You're supposed to clean the buttplugs?

hmm.....

If you don't know that I am taking my toy's and going home, the easier way is to put a condom on them before using and change the condoms before reusing.

pics or it's all lies! lies, I tellya! LIES


24.media.tumblr.com
Well if you want pics of my toy collection, and unfortunately she's not one : )
Well that , the toy collection would take time and well wouldn't be all that exciting to the passive viewer.
 
2012-12-12 05:21:10 AM
well it might be!
 
2012-12-12 05:27:15 AM
also...you should always clean your barbie and ken dolls up after you play with them and not leave them around for the maid. or use condoms!
 
2012-12-12 05:33:10 AM

Omahawg: well it might be!


Well any thing is possible but I'm So tired and well I know that's just the tip off the iceberg but well still have good times, time after time
 
2012-12-12 06:12:06 AM
Is that 50 shades of gray thing still happening? I thought we were pretty much done with that now.
 
2012-12-12 06:18:14 AM

monstera: also...you should always clean your barbie and ken dolls up after you play with them and not leave them around for the maid. or use condoms!


And please use a condom when you shove a Ken doll up your ass. It'll make it easier for the paramedics to get it out.
 
2012-12-12 06:29:39 AM

fusillade762: monstera: also...you should always clean your barbie and ken dolls up after you play with them and not leave them around for the maid. or use condoms!

And please use a condom when you shove a Ken doll up your ass. It'll make it easier for the paramedics to get it out.


bears repeating. bears. repeating. bears. watch what you stick up your butt folks, really. bears repeating.
 
2012-12-12 07:24:06 AM

Fell In Love With a Chair: What the fark is the appeal of this book again? I tried reading just a review and the reviewer wasn't even able to complete it, it was so terrible.


Everything you need to know about 50 Shades of Gray:

#: of occurrences of literary device

41: characters roll their eyes
35: Ana bites her lip
16: Christian's lips "quirk up"
17: Christian "cocks his head to one side"
15: characters "purse" their lips
50: characters raise their eyebrows
80: references to Ana's anthropomorphic "subconscious"
58: references to Ana's "inner goddess"
92: Ana saying some form of "oh crap" (including "holy crap", "double crap", or "triple crap").
81: Ana says "Jeez"
72: Ana says "oh my"
125: Ana "blushes" or "flushes" (including 13 that are "scarlet," 6 that are "crimson," and one that is "stars and stripes red.")
13: Ana "peeks up" at Christian
9: references to Christian's "hooded eyes"
7: references to Christians "long index finger"
25: references to how "hot" Christian is (including 4: "He's so freaking hot.")
10: Christian's "mouth presses into a hard line"
199: characters "murmur"
49: characters "mutter"
195: characters "whisper"
21: characters "clamber" on/in/out of things
34: characters "smirk"
46: characters "gasp"
18: "breath hitches"
124: "grins"
124 "frowns"
And orgasms are always described as intense, body-shattering, delicious, violent, all-consuming, turbulent, agonizing and exhausting

And this is only book one.
 
2012-12-12 08:01:53 AM
"Wishbone and the Illustrated Classics series have gotten me through every conversation I've ever had about Dickens, Treasure Island, The Anarchist's Cookbook, and Our Bodies, Ourselves."

imgs.xkcd.com

/credit to XKCD.com
//is that how CCL works?
 
2012-12-12 08:16:53 AM
Here's a imaginative way to re purpose Barbie dolls
img845.imageshack.us
 
2012-12-12 08:44:48 AM
People who live in the neighbourhood can talk to us if they're offended by it,

I'm going to take a wild guess at one thing Shannon Lee Mannion didn't do. It's Wanda's in the middle of the village. Stop being so stuffy and meet the community halfway, or scrunch up your nose and carry on. Flapping your arms about it just makes you look silly.
 
2012-12-12 10:04:31 AM
This is a good idea.

Start training them young.
 
2012-12-12 10:31:35 AM

fusillade762: Ken and Ken and Barbie and Barbie engaged in oral, anal sex and other shenanigans.

How can you tell when a pair of dolls with no genitals are having anal sex?


From the copious plastic santorum?

Seriously, you could throw a lubed up team of nympho contortionist lesbians into a dumpster full of Magic Wands on max and if it happenened in Ottawa, it would be a boner killer.
 
2012-12-12 10:31:54 AM

Ishkur:
And this is only book one.


I'm such a schmuck. I bought it to see what the fuss was all about. It was like the a Harlequin Romance had a bastard child with Hustler. What a waste of time and money. How many times did the bimbo say "oh my"? I kept hearing it in George Takei's voice.
 
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