If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Pittsburgh City Paper)   Gentlemen, the situation is dire: our employees are forced to go to food banks to make ends meet. Therefore, I propose, we open our own food bank   (pghcitypaper.com) divider line 381
    More: Asinine, University of Pittsburgh Medical Center, food banks, 'Tis the Season, Allegheny County, pantry  
•       •       •

16176 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Dec 2012 at 9:15 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



381 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-12-11 10:14:58 PM

udhq: Charity is the opposite of justice.


The Hebrew word for charity is both justice and righteousness.

/And you are a very, very horrible person.
 
2012-12-11 10:15:08 PM
Holy shiat you people are nit-picky. This thread is the definition of can't see the forest for the trees. The example was broad and cobbled together...it was only meant to represent the idea of not being able to raise pay because it would cut out any profit. People's value, in dollars, is limited by what value, in dollars, they produce.

Is everyone here farking autistic? That's a serious question.
 
2012-12-11 10:15:10 PM
Food bank? Wish I could eat it. Right now, I have the worst kind of broken tooth misery. I could be in Rio, Paris or on the Space Station, and all I'd really crave is a dentist's needle. Yep, ths shiat is fo real!
 
2012-12-11 10:15:27 PM

Silly Jesus: jaylectricity: Silly Jesus: jaylectricity: Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth!

No wage slave has ever been paid even half of what he's worth.

I don't mean your unicorn fru-fru fantasy idea of what his soul is worth...I mean his worth to the company.

If you're making the company a $10 profit per hour of your labor, your labor isn't worth $15 an hour, no matter how hungry your family is.

I don't want to get into a long discussion, but $10 profit is above and beyond the wage you're paying the worker. I'm talking about the wealth created by a wage slave's work.

Huh?

I own a company, and I sell widgets. I get $11 for each widget that I sell. I pay Bob $10 for each widget that he makes, but his family is hungry. What is your solution for the evil business owner?




Since your reading comprehension sucks as much donkey balls as your logic, I've bolded the key words for you. Do try to keep up.
 
2012-12-11 10:15:28 PM

positive p: Profit is what a company earns after subtracting costs from revenue. Labor is a cost. $10 profit per hour of labor means that the labor was paid for and created $10 extra dollars for the company.

These are basic principles of business. Like, extremely basic.


Exactly. And they're wildly different from basic principles of society.
 
2012-12-11 10:15:34 PM
How dare they start a charity to help people. The nerve.
 
2012-12-11 10:15:40 PM

L.D. Ablo: Let's just bring back indentured servitude.

Sell yourself to a corporation for seven years to get out of your student loans.


Sounds sweet. Took me 13 years...
 
2012-12-11 10:16:58 PM

cman: FunkOut: cman: FunkOut: There's a lot of business experts in here with nothing to during the night that sit at their computer and argue with other shut-ins.

JUST LIKE THERE ARE A BUNCH OF LOSERS HIGH OR DRUNK BE AUSE THEY HAVETH NOT A LIFE

That's nice dear. I mean, I'm a shut in myself. I just sit here knitting and sipping tea.

I was speaking about myself. I apologize that in retrospect, I can see why a normal person would think that I was talking about them. Me being a Moran aside, I ask for your forgiveness


No bother. You know, with the all caps and the "haveth not" at the end, I thought you might be Kenneth Branagh for a moment.
 
2012-12-11 10:16:59 PM

pxlboy: utah dude: uh... sounds like a lot of people in this thread need to be poor once just to see how it is. what state is this upmc in?

This.

/implying that becoming poor is always the result of bad choices


when i was poorer than now a free can of soup was a blessing i was thankful for.
 
2012-12-11 10:18:43 PM

suziequzie: L.D. Ablo: Let's just bring back indentured servitude.

Sell yourself to a corporation for seven years to get out of your student loans.

Sounds sweet. Took me 13 years...


You could have done it in six in the military.

/The downside is the higher risk of being shot.
//Oh, and owing taxes on the 15% "forgiven" each year.
 
2012-12-11 10:19:57 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: "I turned my head and started to cry because I was so angry, although she thought I was crying because of the gesture. They just don't get that I'd rather they pay me a better wage so I wouldn't have to go to a food bank."

Damn, just... damn.


DNRTFA and thanks for the heads up.

/I donate to the food bank and Planned Parenthood.
 
2012-12-11 10:20:40 PM

Silly Jesus: Holy shiat you people are nit-picky. This thread is the definition of can't see the forest for the trees. The example was broad and cobbled together...it was only meant to represent the idea of not being able to raise pay because it would cut out any profit. People's value, in dollars, is limited by what value, in dollars, they produce.

Is everyone here farking autistic? That's a serious question.


HAHA! I used an idiotic example to explain a complex problem! And when you claim it makes no sense, I'll just say that you don't get it! HAHA!

Forest for the trees....classic backpedal of a dumbass argument.

In summary, Silly Jesus, I could eat alphabet soup and shiat a better argument than that.
 
2012-12-11 10:21:13 PM

demaL-demaL-yeH: skullkrusher: demaL-demaL-yeH: willfullyobscure: I wonder what the C-level salaries are for this non-profit?Niiice.

Twenty-three employees pulling in more than a million? In a $5 billion non-profit?
I think I know where I'd look for enough money to get Leslie and her chainmates a raise to a living wage after nine years.

a different job?

Name the largest employer in the state, farkwit. Go on - I'll wait.


seems like you already did. This is your argument? She already works for the largest employer in the state - employing some 55,000 people in a state of 12,000,000 people ergo she can't work somewhere else?

You know what the largest employer in New York State is? North Shore-LIJ Health System with 37,000 employees. Guess where no one I know works? There.
 
2012-12-11 10:21:13 PM

Silly Jesus: Is everyone here farking autistic? That's a serious question.


Does the factory in which you manufacture these widgets use incandescent or fluorescent lighting? Do you sell any of those widgets to South America? Does "Bob" like pie?

So many unknown variables here.
 
2012-12-11 10:21:16 PM

the_chief: How dare they start a charity to help people. The nerve.


Well, zeroing out the top level pay wouldn't solve the issue, so maybe if they fire half their employees, and double the pay and workload of those remaining. . .
Problem solved!
 
2012-12-11 10:22:23 PM

joonyer: In summary, I could eat alphabet soup and shiat a better argument than that.


That is, by far, the best signature line on Fark.

/Just don't abuse it.
 
2012-12-11 10:22:25 PM

Insatiable Jesus: Jesus, when do we start hunting these greedy pukes on their golf courses?


I like Insatiable Jesus way more than Silly Jesus.
 
2012-12-11 10:22:25 PM

orclover: BOOTSTRAPS!! why the fark arent all you farking libs pulling yerselves up by yer bootstraps!!!


who said anything about libs? You should get that persecution complex checked out.
 
2012-12-11 10:22:27 PM

the_chief: How dare they start a charity to help people. The nerve.


A charity to help their employees (take a minute to think about that)
The nerve indeed.
 
2012-12-11 10:22:34 PM

joonyer: Silly Jesus: Holy shiat you people are nit-picky. This thread is the definition of can't see the forest for the trees. The example was broad and cobbled together...it was only meant to represent the idea of not being able to raise pay because it would cut out any profit. People's value, in dollars, is limited by what value, in dollars, they produce.

Is everyone here farking autistic? That's a serious question.

HAHA! I used an idiotic example to explain a complex problem! And when you claim it makes no sense, I'll just say that you don't get it! HAHA!

Forest for the trees....classic backpedal of a dumbass argument.

In summary, Silly Jesus, I could eat alphabet soup and shiat a better argument than that.


It's the fact that everyone was concentrating on a mis-statement and ignoring the larger argument. I really does seem autistic. Aspergers maybe?
 
2012-12-11 10:23:23 PM

Silly Jesus: Holy shiat you people are nit-picky. This thread is the definition of can't see the forest for the trees. The example was broad and cobbled together...it was only meant to represent the idea of not being able to raise pay because it would cut out any profit. People's value, in dollars, is limited by what value, in dollars, they produce.

Is everyone here farking autistic? That's a serious question.


No. You are just a horrible person.
 
2012-12-11 10:24:11 PM

demaL-demaL-yeH: joonyer: In summary, I could eat alphabet soup and shiat a better argument than that.

That is, by far, the best signature line on Fark.

/Just don't abuse it.


Thank you, but I certainly cannot take credit for it. I try not to abuse it, and only use it on the worst offenders of logic and reason.

Silly Jesus, please stand up and accept your prize. You've earned it.
 
2012-12-11 10:24:15 PM

L.D. Ablo: Let's just bring back indentured servitude.

Sell yourself to a corporation for seven years to get out of your student loans.


They have that. It's called working for a living.
 
2012-12-11 10:24:16 PM

Silly Jesus: Even if the company isn't hurting (which is the case for some of them, for some of them it isn't), show me where any company is obligated to pay anyone some arbitrary amount which will make their employee "comfortable."


Uh... Minimum wage laws?

That's the whole point of minimum wage laws, to keep companies from paying what they could get away with to people desperate enough to take it. Unfortunately, adjusted for everything, minimum wage is almost at an all time low right now.
 
2012-12-11 10:24:35 PM

Silly Jesus: lelio: Silly Jesus: I own a company, and I sell widgets. I get $11 for each widget that I sell. I pay Bob $10 for each widget that he makes, but his family is hungry. What is your solution for the evil business owner?

Obviously to stop paying yourself a salary, Mr. McGreedyPants

I know (hope) you're being facetious, but this is what libs actually believe.


He'll go out of business shortly because he can't pay his suppliers, or his rent, or his utilities, or his taxes because he's charging too little for his product. The UPMC or Walmart, and papa john's have done a pretty brilliant job dumping their healthcare costs, food costs, housing costs of their employees on the taxpayers I think they'll figure out a way to stay profitable if they paid their employees enough to live.
 
2012-12-11 10:24:42 PM

jaylectricity: Silly Jesus: I own a company, and I sell widgets. I get $11 for each widget that I sell. I pay Bob $10 for each widget that he makes, but his family is hungry. What is your solution for the evil business owner?

Silly Jesus:

2. Even if the company isn't hurting (which is the case for some of them, for some of them it isn't), show me where any company is obligated to pay anyone some arbitrary amount which will make their employee "comfortable."


Ah I think we're finally making progress. Here you've clearly equivocated. You think that not being hungry is a 'comfort' instead of a basic function of human dignity in a society that can easily afford to eradicate this problem as if it were polio.

This is the lack of moral leadership people keep complaining about.

 
2012-12-11 10:25:31 PM

FatalDischarge: Silly Jesus: Holy shiat you people are nit-picky. This thread is the definition of can't see the forest for the trees. The example was broad and cobbled together...it was only meant to represent the idea of not being able to raise pay because it would cut out any profit. People's value, in dollars, is limited by what value, in dollars, they produce.

Is everyone here farking autistic? That's a serious question.

No. You are just a horrible person.


Better horrible than autistic.
 
2012-12-11 10:26:16 PM

Silly Jesus: FatalDischarge: Silly Jesus: Holy shiat you people are nit-picky. This thread is the definition of can't see the forest for the trees. The example was broad and cobbled together...it was only meant to represent the idea of not being able to raise pay because it would cut out any profit. People's value, in dollars, is limited by what value, in dollars, they produce.

Is everyone here farking autistic? That's a serious question.

No. You are just a horrible person.

Better horrible than autistic.


..... wow.
 
2012-12-11 10:26:17 PM

skullkrusher: This is your argument? She already works for the largest employer in the state


The point is they don't pay a living wage. To employees of nine years. Do you believe, for even an instant, that smaller employers don't follow their example?

/Never mind. Your core value and most salient characteristic is blatant dishonesty.
//Carry on.
 
2012-12-11 10:26:28 PM
I've heard a line that a Republican is a Democrat who got mugged.

Add to that, a Democrat is a Republican who went broke.
 
2012-12-11 10:26:29 PM
Well, this isn't mentioned in a real newspaper. Guessing it's some disconnected facts twisted to fit the paper's world-view.
 
2012-12-11 10:27:02 PM
Obviously UPMC was worried that if they gave a pay raise the money still would not be used for groceries, and the employees would still go to the food bank. So this way they know they are providing food directly.

/ bet they'd complain if they were hung with a new rope too.
 
2012-12-11 10:27:11 PM

positive p: jaylectricity: Silly Jesus: I own a company, and I sell widgets. I get $11 for each widget that I sell. I pay Bob $10 for each widget that he makes, but his family is hungry. What is your solution for the evil business owner?

Silly Jesus:

2. Even if the company isn't hurting (which is the case for some of them, for some of them it isn't), show me where any company is obligated to pay anyone some arbitrary amount which will make their employee "comfortable."


Ah I think we're finally making progress. Here you've clearly equivocated. You think that not being hungry is a 'comfort' instead of a basic function of human dignity in a society that can easily afford to eradicate this problem as if it were polio.

This is the lack of moral leadership people keep complaining about.


Businesses are not charities.
 
2012-12-11 10:28:18 PM

Silly Jesus: FatalDischarge: Silly Jesus: Holy shiat you people are nit-picky. This thread is the definition of can't see the forest for the trees. The example was broad and cobbled together...it was only meant to represent the idea of not being able to raise pay because it would cut out any profit. People's value, in dollars, is limited by what value, in dollars, they produce.

Is everyone here farking autistic? That's a serious question.

No. You are just a horrible person.

Better horrible than autistic.


No. Horrible people cause problems. You are what is wrong with America. Not that you would know.
 
2012-12-11 10:28:21 PM

orclover: Every job that pays less than $15 dollars an hour should come with a list of social programs to help you stay alive and somewhat healthy, or at least not in constant pain. But yea, socialism, cant have that. So everybody enjoy yer toothaches and broken limbs peasants.


I think some Walmarts did this and got biatched at for it. The idea was that rather than helping people know where the safety nets are and how to make sure they're in them, they should have been paying real actual livable wages. If you're working full time and need help to survive, even with minimum wage, it means the economy is farked up, or you've farked up real bad somewhere and need to reevaluate your life.
 
2012-12-11 10:28:23 PM

skullkrusher: orclover: BOOTSTRAPS!! why the fark arent all you farking libs pulling yerselves up by yer bootstraps!!!

who said anything about libs? You should get that persecution complex checked out.


Its funny because, you know you used to...remember when you....never mind. You know I have you favorited for a reason right?
 
2012-12-11 10:28:28 PM

Silly Jesus: Holy shiat you people are nit-picky. This thread is the definition of can't see the forest for the trees. The example was broad and cobbled together...it was only meant to represent the idea of not being able to raise pay because it would cut out any profit. People's value, in dollars, is limited by what value, in dollars, they produce.

Is everyone here farking autistic? That's a serious question.


In trying to come up with a "broad and cobbled together" example you created a scenario where--as is usually the case--the conundrum is the fault of incompetent ownership instead of greed by labor.

...maybe you're better at this than we give you credit for.
 
2012-12-11 10:29:03 PM

Silly Jesus:
1. My example was purposefully simplistic (and it still confused everyone)...so yeah, I understand profit...anywho...

2. Even if the company isn't hurting (which is the case for some of them, for some of them it isn't), show me where any company is obligated to pay anyone some arbitrary amount which will make their employee "comfortable."


1. No, no, no... your example was stupid and had fark-all to do with the current discussion, and showed you to be an idiot with regards to what the definition of "profit" is. That's not nit-picking, that's correctly pointing out that you have no idea what you're talking about and that your "example" offers nothing as far as insight into the current situation.

2. I see we've already moved the goalposts. The problem is not "do they have a right to do this"... precisely zero people in this thread have argued that their wages are illegally low. The point is that they shouldn't be doing this, since paying a liveable wage is something that a company should do for its employees. It's not a legal argument, it's an ethical one. To sit and say "well, they don't have to" is to miss the entire point of the argument and the article, just as UPMC did with it's food bank idea.
 
2012-12-11 10:29:38 PM
Just out of curiosity, I wonder how much she is getting paid per hour and what work she is doing. Also what is her situation.

- Does she have like 10 kids?
- Are the 10 kids from 8 dads who pay no support?
- Did she borrow foolishly in the housing bubble and now owes a huge mortgage she cannot cover?
- New car every 2 years?

Article lacks details to fuel our (possible) indignation
 
2012-12-11 10:29:48 PM

Boojum2k: the_chief: How dare they start a charity to help people. The nerve.

Well, zeroing out the top level pay wouldn't solve the issue, so maybe if they fire half their employees, and double the pay and workload of those remaining. . .
Problem solved!


I like the way you think.
 
2012-12-11 10:30:15 PM

gopher321: That's completely pathetic. Who the fark runs that company, Ebenezar Scrooge?


Apparently it wasn't started by the hospital, but by a group of employees. Still, the sensible thing to do would be contributing to/volunteering at a well-run existing food bank, rather than setting up a private system just for their coworkers.
 
2012-12-11 10:31:15 PM
Executives really have to get it through their skull that Americans really don't need much to be fat, complacent and happy.
 
2012-12-11 10:31:15 PM

FatalDischarge: Silly Jesus: FatalDischarge: Silly Jesus: Holy shiat you people are nit-picky. This thread is the definition of can't see the forest for the trees. The example was broad and cobbled together...it was only meant to represent the idea of not being able to raise pay because it would cut out any profit. People's value, in dollars, is limited by what value, in dollars, they produce.

Is everyone here farking autistic? That's a serious question.

No. You are just a horrible person.

Better horrible than autistic.

No. Horrible people cause problems. You are what is wrong with America. Not that you would know.


Your face is what is wrong with America.
 
2012-12-11 10:31:39 PM

Silly Jesus: joonyer: Silly Jesus: Holy shiat you people are nit-picky. This thread is the definition of can't see the forest for the trees. The example was broad and cobbled together...it was only meant to represent the idea of not being able to raise pay because it would cut out any profit. People's value, in dollars, is limited by what value, in dollars, they produce.

Is everyone here farking autistic? That's a serious question.

HAHA! I used an idiotic example to explain a complex problem! And when you claim it makes no sense, I'll just say that you don't get it! HAHA!

Forest for the trees....classic backpedal of a dumbass argument.

In summary, Silly Jesus, I could eat alphabet soup and shiat a better argument than that.

It's the fact that everyone was concentrating on a mis-statement and ignoring the larger argument. I really does seem autistic. Aspergers maybe?


"Mis-statements" are a core aspect of your postings here. Nothing new.

Also, W, it's just "misstatement", no hyphen required. But feel free to make up your own words as needed. We won't laugh. Much.
 
2012-12-11 10:31:48 PM
Company reduces the pay of employees.
Company creates a charity that provides essentials for employees.
Company gets tax deductions; employees stay at "same" pay?
 
2012-12-11 10:31:51 PM

demaL-demaL-yeH: The point is they don't pay a living wage. To employees of nine years. Do you believe, for even an instant, that smaller employers don't follow their example?


No, I am wholly convinced that every clerical and administrative worker in the state of Pennsylvania must rely on food banks to meet ends meet. Hey, a subset of the employees of the largest employer needs to, it must be true for all employers.

Wal-Mart is the largest employer in the United States. They are notorious for underpaying their workers. How the hell do any of us afford anything - what with all our smaller employers following their lead.
 
2012-12-11 10:31:52 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: "I turned my head and started to cry because I was so angry, although she thought I was crying because of the gesture. They just don't get that I'd rather they pay me a better wage so I wouldn't have to go to a food bank."

Damn, just... damn.


I think it's time for mass exodus.

I mean, I know the workers gotta make ends meet, but they have to realize that if their wages can't keep them off of food stamps and out of soup kitchens, then their job is not helping them make ends meet.

Meanwhile, if I ever have to go to a hospital in Pittsburgh, it won't be at UPMC.
 
2012-12-11 10:33:00 PM

orclover: skullkrusher: orclover: BOOTSTRAPS!! why the fark arent all you farking libs pulling yerselves up by yer bootstraps!!!

who said anything about libs? You should get that persecution complex checked out.

Its funny because, you know you used to...remember when you....never mind. You know I have you favorited for a reason right?


umm... I've never been one of the "LIBS!!!!!1!!" types.
No, I had no idea that you had me favorited or the reason
 
2012-12-11 10:33:39 PM

SockMonkeyHolocaust: Executives really have to get it through their skull that Americans really don't need much to be fat, complacent and happy.


Hmm. Maybe.
/Brass-jacketed lead might do the trick, too.
 
2012-12-11 10:33:48 PM

Silly Jesus: jaylectricity: Silly Jesus: jaylectricity: Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth!

No wage slave has ever been paid even half of what he's worth.

I don't mean your unicorn fru-fru fantasy idea of what his soul is worth...I mean his worth to the company.

If you're making the company a $10 profit per hour of your labor, your labor isn't worth $15 an hour, no matter how hungry your family is.

I don't want to get into a long discussion, but $10 profit is above and beyond the wage you're paying the worker. I'm talking about the wealth created by a wage slave's work.

Huh?

I own a company, and I sell widgets. I get $11 for each widget that I sell. I pay Bob $10 for each widget that he makes, but his family is hungry. What is your solution for the evil business owner?


Liquidation. You run a lousy company, and you're doing Bob no favors by not being able to pay him a living wage. It'll hurt, but it'll be better in the long run.
 
Displayed 50 of 381 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report