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(Pittsburgh City Paper)   Gentlemen, the situation is dire: our employees are forced to go to food banks to make ends meet. Therefore, I propose, we open our own food bank   (pghcitypaper.com) divider line 381
    More: Asinine, University of Pittsburgh Medical Center, food banks, 'Tis the Season, Allegheny County, pantry  
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16178 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Dec 2012 at 9:15 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-11 09:33:58 PM  
just wow...

I think madam Guillotine needs to show up at the next boardroom meeting.Ya think a boardroom filled with headless corpses of ex-execs might... just might.. be enough to scare wallstreet and its ilk that maybe they need to stop being dicks to the rest of the population?

It'd be interesting to see what the effect would be if it happened. I imagine we'd see the executives fleeing for armed and defended compounds and the people on Fox freak out that the peons are rising up...
 
2012-12-11 09:34:35 PM  

Goetz: Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth! I don't understand economics / capitalism / life! Whargarbll.

You suck at this.


Excellent retort, Edison.
 
2012-12-11 09:34:38 PM  
"Hey, times are tough. What if we opened a food bank?"
"You mean, for the poor?"
"No, for our
employees!"

img803.imageshack.us
 
2012-12-11 09:34:51 PM  

sno man: That was the quote I was going to post and what you said was close enough to my FFS that I have to give you props for getting here first...


It's just... gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

Words fail here.
 
2012-12-11 09:34:52 PM  

Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth!


No wage slave has ever been paid even half of what he's worth.
 
2012-12-11 09:35:08 PM  

Bell-fan: just wow...

I think madam Guillotine needs to show up at the next boardroom meeting.Ya think a boardroom filled with headless corpses of ex-execs might... just might.. be enough to scare wallstreet and its ilk that maybe they need to stop being dicks to the rest of the population?

It'd be interesting to see what the effect would be if it happened. I imagine we'd see the executives fleeing for armed and defended compounds and the people on Fox freak out that the peons are rising up...


this is a non-profit health insurance company. I don't think Wall St gives a fark.
 
2012-12-11 09:35:26 PM  
I think this has happened before Link
 
2012-12-11 09:35:49 PM  

Gordian Cipher: Heh, my company lets you link your paycheck with your ID badge, so you can just swipe your badge in the cafeteria and have the money taken out of your paycheck. I'm sure it's all legal (Fortune 500 company and all), but it seems awful close to Hooverville.

/I don't do that
//I'd rather put it on the credit card that earns me points


It's legal so long as it is optional, in trade for money. So a company can say "You can pay directly for your paycheck for food/parking/whatever, or you can pay us in cash/CC." It is just a convenience for you, they aren't taking away money, you still get paid if you opt not to do that.

What they can't do is pay you in their own currency, that you can spend only on their services.

The withholding thing is pretty common. I work at a university and we can pay for parking that way if we like (I bike instead because I'm cheap). Likewise students can charge certain things like parking and meal plans to their bursar's account, and pay it all at once.
 
2012-12-11 09:35:51 PM  

iheartscotch: This is what is going to happen to companies forced to provide health care for those who work over 30 hours; no one is going to work over 30 hours and they are going to have to provide their own insurance or they will be penalized.

/ and I thought I was evil


Fewer hours from each employee, more sick employees, means we need more employees.

So it was jobs bill.
 
2012-12-11 09:35:54 PM  
Every job that pays less than $15 dollars an hour should come with a list of social programs to help you stay alive and somewhat healthy, or at least not in constant pain. But yea, socialism, cant have that. So everybody enjoy yer toothaches and broken limbs peasants.
 
2012-12-11 09:36:10 PM  

Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth! I don't understand economics / capitalism / life! Whargarbll.


Jesus, you're stupid.

/Yes, it's been said before. Bears repeating.
 
2012-12-11 09:36:21 PM  
Welcome to Obama's America. This is what Pittsburgh voted for. Fark 'em.
 
2012-12-11 09:36:28 PM  

LordOfThePings: iheartscotch: This is what is going to happen to companies forced to provide health care for those who work over 30 hours; no one is going to work over 30 hours and they are going to have to provide their own insurance or they will be penalized.

/ and I thought I was evil

Fewer hours from each employee, more sick employees, means we need more employees.

So it was a jobs bill.


FTFM.
 
2012-12-11 09:37:39 PM  
This company's policy: THROW THE FILTHY PEASANTS A HUNK OF BREAD!
 
2012-12-11 09:37:50 PM  

skullkrusher: I think madam Guillotine needs to show up at the next boardroom meeting.Ya think a boardroom filled with headless corpses of ex-execs might... just might.. be enough to scare wallstreet and its ilk that maybe they need to stop being dicks to the rest of the population?


cdn.newsday.com

He's in.
 
2012-12-11 09:37:58 PM  

orclover: Every job that pays less than $15 dollars an hour should come with a list of social programs to help you stay alive and somewhat healthy, or at least not in constant pain. But yea, socialism, cant have that. So everybody enjoy yer toothaches and broken limbs peasants.


or people could use the socialist public libraries and look up what programs are available to them.
 
2012-12-11 09:38:40 PM  

SithLord: Welcome to Obama's America. This is what Pittsburgh voted for. Fark 'em.


LOLWUT?
 
2012-12-11 09:38:55 PM  

skullkrusher: Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth! I don't understand economics / capitalism / life! Whargarbll.

You're truly insatiable!


I would have gone with "Jesus you're Silly", mostly to avoid the second "that's what she said" in the last 2 hours...
 
2012-12-11 09:39:43 PM  

jaylectricity: Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth!

No wage slave has ever been paid even half of what he's worth.


I don't mean your unicorn fru-fru fantasy idea of what his soul is worth...I mean his worth to the company.

If you're making the company a $10 profit per hour of your labor, your labor isn't worth $15 an hour, no matter how hungry your family is.
 
2012-12-11 09:39:44 PM  
uh... sounds like a lot of people in this thread need to be poor once just to see how it is. what state is this upmc in?
 
2012-12-11 09:40:33 PM  

sno man: skullkrusher: Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth! I don't understand economics / capitalism / life! Whargarbll.

You're truly insatiable!

I would have gone with "Jesus you're Silly", mostly to avoid the second "that's what she said" in the last 2 hours...


That's what she said.
 
2012-12-11 09:40:47 PM  

utah dude: uh... sounds like a lot of people in this thread need to be poor once just to see how it is. what state is this upmc in?


This.

/implying that becoming poor is always the result of bad choices
 
2012-12-11 09:41:19 PM  

utah dude: uh... sounds like a lot of people in this thread need to be poor once just to see how it is. what state is this upmc in?


I know, right? Because being poor means that someone owes you something!
 
2012-12-11 09:41:28 PM  

sno man: skullkrusher: Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth! I don't understand economics / capitalism / life! Whargarbll.

You're truly insatiable!

I would have gone with "Jesus you're Silly", mostly to avoid the second "that's what she said" in the last 2 hours...


I just like referencing his equally annoying alt at all times
 
2012-12-11 09:42:16 PM  
I wonder what the C-level salaries are for this non-profit?Niiice.
 
2012-12-11 09:42:19 PM  

utah dude: what state is this upmc in?


Let's see... Pittsburgh, Pittsburgh... North Dakota.
 
2012-12-11 09:42:19 PM  

Silly Jesus: jaylectricity: Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth!

No wage slave has ever been paid even half of what he's worth.

I don't mean your unicorn fru-fru fantasy idea of what his soul is worth...I mean his worth to the company.

If you're making the company a $10 profit per hour of your labor, your labor isn't worth $15 an hour, no matter how hungry your family is.


I don't want to get into a long discussion, but $10 profit is above and beyond the wage you're paying the worker. I'm talking about the wealth created by a wage slave's work.
 
2012-12-11 09:42:54 PM  

Lsherm: This reminds me of a complaint one of my coworkers had this year: someone on a conference call spent an hour making fun of everyone else on the call because he thought he had muted his phone. Even worse, since he had the volume for the call turned down, every time they stopped the meeting to ask him to stop being an ass he didn't realize they were talking to him.

Many complaints were sent up the chain and his boss sent out a very apologetic email promising that next time he would make sure he was actually on mute.


I'm pretty sure I used to work with that guy too.

/great story
 
2012-12-11 09:43:10 PM  

BKITU: jehovahs witness protection: Yeah? Well, just try making a seed deposit at the food bank, then come back in a few months expecting to make a withdrawal.

I tried that, but at a sperm bank. They kicked me out and told me to never come again.


I lol'ed
 
2012-12-11 09:44:05 PM  
You see corporations do care about their people. When their employees don't make enough, they come with charity. Wal-Mart should open up food banks for their employees too.

We don't need unions, we need charity.
 
2012-12-11 09:44:19 PM  

Fart_Machine: SithLord: Welcome to Obama's America. This is what Pittsburgh voted for. Fark 'em.

LOLWUT?


The future of America. And Pittsburgh voted for the One bringing it all to us. Again, Fark 'em.
 
2012-12-11 09:44:31 PM  

Funk Brothers: You see corporations do care about their people. When their employees don't make enough, they come with charity. Wal-Mart should open up food banks for their employees too.

We don't need unions, we need charity.


And not livable wages, apparently.
 
2012-12-11 09:44:57 PM  

gopher321: That's completely pathetic. Who the fark runs that company, Ebenezar Scrooge?


Wal-MART pays a company millions of dollars per year to run a call center where social workers direct Wal-MART employees to the nearest charity food bank, help them apply for welfare, food stamps and rent assistance. Every Wal-MART store has a poster in the breakroom with the phone number and they also print up little inserts to put into the envelope with the employee's paycheck. New employee orientation includes a section on calling the "Resources for Living" hotline. All of this is cheaper than just paying the employees a living wage.
 
2012-12-11 09:45:29 PM  
That gives a new meaning to the expression "Christmas boner."
 
2012-12-11 09:45:44 PM  
This isn't satire?
 
2012-12-11 09:46:08 PM  

SithLord: Fart_Machine: SithLord: Welcome to Obama's America. This is what Pittsburgh voted for. Fark 'em.

LOLWUT?

The future of America. And Pittsburgh voted for the One bringing it all to us. Again, Fark 'em.


I had no idea Obama set the wages for UPMC. Oh wait, you're trolling. Sorry.
 
2012-12-11 09:47:05 PM  

willfullyobscure: I wonder what the C-level salaries are for this non-profit?Niiice.


Good lord, you can make $1-$3m a year salary working at a non-profit!?? My country has gone insane.
 
2012-12-11 09:47:23 PM  
I wasn't aware that neurosurgeons made that much. A half-mil, perhaps, but 1.8m? Wow.
 
2012-12-11 09:47:36 PM  

jaylectricity: Silly Jesus: jaylectricity: Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth!

No wage slave has ever been paid even half of what he's worth.

I don't mean your unicorn fru-fru fantasy idea of what his soul is worth...I mean his worth to the company.

If you're making the company a $10 profit per hour of your labor, your labor isn't worth $15 an hour, no matter how hungry your family is.

I don't want to get into a long discussion, but $10 profit is above and beyond the wage you're paying the worker. I'm talking about the wealth created by a wage slave's work.


Huh?

I own a company, and I sell widgets. I get $11 for each widget that I sell. I pay Bob $10 for each widget that he makes, but his family is hungry. What is your solution for the evil business owner?
 
2012-12-11 09:48:08 PM  
WTF is UPMC? I didn't see it spelled out once in the article. Same for SEIU.

Grown-up journalists write out acronyms at the top of an article so people know what the fark is going on.

/sloppy local papers
//Pet Peeve
 
2012-12-11 09:48:19 PM  
"I don't need them to pick out my food for me; I need them to pay me better wage so I can pick out my own food," says Poston

That's fair. And if they dont pay you more, go work somewhere that will.

Clearly you're not bieng paid in accordance with your value and it will be your current employers loss when you leave.

/the food bank was a stupid move
 
2012-12-11 09:48:34 PM  

willfullyobscure: I wonder what the C-level salaries are for this non-profit?Niiice.


Twenty-three employees pulling in more than a million? In a $5 billion non-profit?
I think I know where I'd look for enough money to get Leslie and her chainmates a raise to a living wage after nine years.
 
2012-12-11 09:48:44 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: sno man: That was the quote I was going to post and what you said was close enough to my FFS that I have to give you props for getting here first...

It's just... gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.

Words fail here.


No kidding. I can't imagine how you could get to this being a better, more cost effective solution that just giving these workers a raise...
 
2012-12-11 09:48:50 PM  

jaylectricity: Silly Jesus: You should pay me more than I'm worth!

No wage slave has ever been paid even half of what he's worth.


Well, when you own a company, feel free to pay your workers $100 per hour.

Of course, if you are the type of person who would actually do that, the chance of you owning a company is zero, so....
 
2012-12-11 09:49:03 PM  

Gordian Cipher: Heh, my company lets you link your paycheck with your ID badge, so you can just swipe your badge in the cafeteria and have the money taken out of your paycheck. I'm sure it's all legal (Fortune 500 company and all), but it seems awful close to Hooverville.


It's the same way at Wal-Mart. They don't allow you to put it on credit toward your paycheck but their employees buying goods from them is basically the same. If they pay someone $10 an hour but that person buys $200-$300 a month from their company, they are only paying that person about $6 an hour after their purchases. If you figure that most people employed at Wal-Mart have no choice but to shop at Wal-Mart(because it's all they can afford and still survive), then Wal-Mart is getting cheap labor because they don't pay shiat for the crap they sell anyway. It's a goddamn shame that people more people don't realize just how bad some companies are farking folks in this country and demand a change. I think we need about 2-3 days of a national strike but most people can't afford to miss that much work.
 
2012-12-11 09:49:34 PM  

demaL-demaL-yeH: willfullyobscure: I wonder what the C-level salaries are for this non-profit?Niiice.

Twenty-three employees pulling in more than a million? In a $5 billion non-profit?
I think I know where I'd look for enough money to get Leslie and her chainmates a raise to a living wage after nine years.


a different job?
 
2012-12-11 09:50:25 PM  

LordOfThePings: LordOfThePings: iheartscotch: This is what is going to happen to companies forced to provide health care for those who work over 30 hours; no one is going to work over 30 hours and they are going to have to provide their own insurance or they will be penalized.

/ and I thought I was evil

Fewer hours from each employee, more sick employees, means we need more employees.

So it was a jobs bill.

FTFM.


I guess you could look at it like that; I look at it from the perspective that many big corporations will do anything to cut overhead; including screwing over their employees.

I wouldn't be surprised to see a lot of companies go to a salary system as aposed to a hourly system just to get around the health care thing.

/ my grandpa always said, "Boy, don't use a bulldozer when a ball-peen hammer will do." They probably should have incentivized the corperations instead of threatening to fine them
 
2012-12-11 09:50:44 PM  

GAT_00: That sounds about right. Don't pay your workers enough? Why not open a food bank so other people can buy them food that you won't pay them enough for.

This is exactly what you get with capitalism.


B-b-b-but rational self-interest!
 
2012-12-11 09:50:56 PM  

TheWhoppah: gopher321: That's completely pathetic. Who the fark runs that company, Ebenezar Scrooge?

Wal-MART pays a company millions of dollars per year to run a call center where social workers direct Wal-MART employees to the nearest charity food bank, help them apply for welfare, food stamps and rent assistance. Every Wal-MART store has a poster in the breakroom with the phone number and they also print up little inserts to put into the envelope with the employee's paycheck. New employee orientation includes a section on calling the "Resources for Living" hotline. All of this is cheaper than just paying the employees a living wage.


Actually this is a form of Corporate Welfare. Wal*MART would have to pay higher wages to get the kind of stable employess that they want... you know, the kind of person with a home who doesn't have to steal food to get buy. Resources for Living allows Wal*MART to pay wages that would normally only attract teenagers and homeless people but government and charities pick up the cost difference so they get actual human employees instead of thieves, children and meth monkeys.
 
2012-12-11 09:51:03 PM  

Silly Jesus: I own a company, and I sell widgets. I get $11 for each widget that I sell. I pay Bob $10 for each widget that he makes, but his family is hungry. What is your solution for the evil business owner?


Obviously to stop paying yourself a salary, Mr. McGreedyPants
 
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