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(KHOU Houston)   Doctor suggests you should take action now if you're an 'Almost Alcoholic'. Drew suggests coughing up $5 a month to remove all doubt   (khou.com) divider line 260
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11427 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Dec 2012 at 4:51 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-11 05:36:57 PM  

Isitoveryet: Mimic_Octopus: PrivateCaboose: Mimic_Octopus: ftfa : "If you're having four beers on Friday night, see how you do with two beers."

it's impossible to take these clowns seriously when they spew this puritanical bullshiat. 2 farking beers on a friday night ? i have 2 beers before i summit a farking 12000 ft mountain, assshole. i have 12- 15 beers on a friday after a week's work. and 2-6 every night between.

save this shiat for the people that are blacking out and beating their kids.

Jesus Christ that's a lot of calories.

6' 175. consume several thousand calories per day, burn as many or more between walking to work, using stairs not elevator and hitting the gym on lunch break, then hiking or snowboarding on weekends

I used to eat/drink whatever the hell i wanted right up til about a year ago then the calories finally caught up with me, 6' 3" pushing 230, just (what feels like) a few months ago i was at 190. It all happened so fast, i blame my love of beer, a 3 day weekend & the means necessary to finance that kind of idiocy.


1 am 35. i suspect the metabolic shift is right around the corner... may have to cut out lunch to accomodate the beer ? now that would be alcoholic !
 
2012-12-11 05:37:17 PM  

Jon iz teh kewl: PrivateCaboose: Jon iz teh kewl: Citrate1007: Jon iz teh kewl: alcoholism is only a problem if the user is violent
case closed

Neglected children beg to differ.

why are you drinking if your married?

if i get married i'm never drinking again because i'd be honestly happy

Marriage doesn't automagically make someone happy. And if you drink because you're unhappy, that's pretty much the first sign you have a problem.

but if i drink because i'm happy then it's an all-u-can-drink smorgasbord?


In DC we call that "Thursday."
 
2012-12-11 05:37:38 PM  

punkhippie: InspectorZero: I realize that some people are unable to control their drinking and destructive behavior it causes, but I really do think there are a lot more people who over-indulge to which the AA model does not apply.

The AA model does not apply to anyone, as it is built entirely on made-up bullshiat. Alcohol addiction is real enough, it just has nothing to do with diseases, powerlessness, higher powers or any of that crap.



Many people are genetically inclined to be addicted to something. This could be drugs, or religion or TV, or internet, food, or excessive exercise etc. AA tends to replace one addiction with highly negative consequences (the alcohol) with another less negative addiction (going to AA meetings).

The various AA concepts are used to aid participation, though for any given individual there are many reasons why it might not work as their personality may not mesh with a particular group.

Generally speaking, many people really are powerless to fight addiction as its in their brain wiring. The best they can hope for is to be addicted to something less unhealthy.
 
2012-12-11 05:40:13 PM  

PrivateCaboose: Jon iz teh kewl: PrivateCaboose: Jon iz teh kewl: Citrate1007: Jon iz teh kewl: alcoholism is only a problem if the user is violent
case closed

Neglected children beg to differ.

why are you drinking if your married?

if i get married i'm never drinking again because i'd be honestly happy

Marriage doesn't automagically make someone happy. And if you drink because you're unhappy, that's pretty much the first sign you have a problem.

but if i drink because i'm happy then it's an all-u-can-drink smorgasbord?

In DC we call that "Thursday."


i'm too young for drinking i drink kids beer (malta goya)
 
2012-12-11 05:40:37 PM  

Jon iz teh kewl: PrivateCaboose: Jon iz teh kewl: Citrate1007: Jon iz teh kewl: alcoholism is only a problem if the user is violent
case closed

Neglected children beg to differ.

why are you drinking if your married?

if i get married i'm never drinking again because i'd be honestly happy

Marriage doesn't automagically make someone happy. And if you drink because you're unhappy, that's pretty much the first sign you have a problem.

but if i drink because i'm happy then it's an all-u-can-drink smorgasbord?


america needs to drop the puritanical zealotry.

it's farking alcohol, not a deal with the devil. drink wine with your wife. happy, sad, who gives a shiat. wine tastes good, and in sufficient quantities, brings about all the effects of drunkenness.

the only time alcohol becomes a problem is if you can't deal with your other depressions such that you abuse alcohol to fark up your responsibilities, obligations, and other good things in life.

some degree of self-awareness will answer any question as to whether you're doing fine or you're burning the candle at both ends.
 
2012-12-11 05:41:07 PM  

TheDirtyNacho: Many people are genetically inclined to be addicted to something.


Horseshiat. There is simply zero credible, scientifically valid evidence for this statement. And you know they've been looking for a long ass time.
 
2012-12-11 05:42:02 PM  

Mimic_Octopus: 1 am 35. i suspect the metabolic shift is right around the corner... may have to cut out lunch to accomodate the beer ? now that would be alcoholic !


that age seems about right, i'll be turning 40 next year & so far the only change has been the belly. you'd think there'd be more but there wasn't.

/oh thinning! the hair is thinner too!
 
2012-12-11 05:42:27 PM  

pute kisses like a man: Jon iz teh kewl: PrivateCaboose: Jon iz teh kewl: Citrate1007: Jon iz teh kewl: alcoholism is only a problem if the user is violent
case closed

Neglected children beg to differ.

why are you drinking if your married?

if i get married i'm never drinking again because i'd be honestly happy

Marriage doesn't automagically make someone happy. And if you drink because you're unhappy, that's pretty much the first sign you have a problem.

but if i drink because i'm happy then it's an all-u-can-drink smorgasbord?

america needs to drop the puritanical zealotry.

it's farking alcohol, not a deal with the devil. drink wine with your wife. happy, sad, who gives a shiat. wine tastes good, and in sufficient quantities, brings about all the effects of drunkenness.

the only time alcohol becomes a problem is if you can't deal with your other depressions such that you abuse alcohol to fark up your responsibilities, obligations, and other good things in life.

some degree of self-awareness will answer any question as to whether you're doing fine or you're burning the candle at both ends.


how about i drink a virtual beer with u
 
2012-12-11 05:42:38 PM  
I scored a 1. Go me.

/drank a hell of a lot in my 20s. Barely drink at all now.
 
2012-12-11 05:43:02 PM  
scored a 3

would've scored a 23 back in college
 
2012-12-11 05:43:06 PM  

PrivateCaboose: Jument: I scored a 5. Yay! I can drink more!

FWIW, you farkers who are saying that 4 beers is nothing are either drinking the wrong kind of beer or are already alcoholics. Or maybe you're just young. I'm in my 40s. There was probably a time when 4 beers wasn't much to me, but it would never have been "nothing".

I wouldn't drive after 4 beers but I'm not exactly drunk after 4 either.


that's one beer a quarter while watching a football game. now, maybe drink 4 beers in one quarter and we can talk drunkenness, but 4 beers in almost as many hours, and I'd be surprised if you showed up on a breathalyzer.
 
2012-12-11 05:44:03 PM  

antidisestablishmentarianism: I scored a 12. I thought it would be much worse.


Same here.
 
2012-12-11 05:45:48 PM  

satanorsanta: The AA model works well for religious alcoholics that actually want to quit. It is a solid crutch.


OK, this I can buy. If you already believe in the fundie god, the one who pretty much hates you but will put up with you if you say you like his kid, then AA might work for you.
 
2012-12-11 05:46:30 PM  

antidisestablishmentarianism: I scored a 12. I thought it would be much worse.


There was a test?

*scurries back to TFA*

13

"Struggle with alcohols? No sire, I don't struggle at all!"
 
2012-12-11 05:46:46 PM  
Dr. Doyle shares, "We're not trying to put labels on people. In fact, we're trying to prevent people from getting the label of a very serious condition."

No Doctor, that is exactly what you are doing.

Much shorter, more legitimate quiz:

1. Do you want a drink?
2. Do you need a drink?

If you answered 'yes' to number 2, get a Pepsi, no booze, and GTFO. When you can answer 'no' to #2 honestly, come back.
 
2012-12-11 05:47:49 PM  
I scored 40

So, like, then is that sorta like 80 proof? Am I at a high risk to buy yet another stupid book about something a first world problem that has been beaten to death? Can I audition for Intervention? Do I have to cry better than everyone else to get a free plane ride at the end while sentimental music mysteriously plays in the background? 

Does the book come with a money back guarantee by Dr.Phil?
astarsmile.com 

// Don't get me all wrong...I know alcoholism is a real problem
// I just get a bit tired of people capitalizing on it with so-called helpful books that are nothing more than a play for a quick buck.
// I can't wait for Dr Drew to weigh in on and dupe more addicts into thinking they are getting help by buying this drivel.
// The Faux Concern Trifecta will be complete then.
 
 
 
2012-12-11 05:48:47 PM  

punkhippie: TheDirtyNacho: Many people are genetically inclined to be addicted to something.

Horseshiat. There is simply zero credible, scientifically valid evidence for this statement. And you know they've been looking for a long ass time.


Better let the APA know, Doc.

These guys too

Or you know what, here
 
2012-12-11 05:50:25 PM  
This whole thread is making me want a beer. I may pick some up on the way home.
 
2012-12-11 05:52:41 PM  

Jon iz teh kewl: pute kisses like a man: Jon iz teh kewl: PrivateCaboose: Jon iz teh kewl: Citrate1007: Jon iz teh kewl: alcoholism is only a problem if the user is violent
case closed

Neglected children beg to differ.

why are you drinking if your married?

if i get married i'm never drinking again because i'd be honestly happy

Marriage doesn't automagically make someone happy. And if you drink because you're unhappy, that's pretty much the first sign you have a problem.

but if i drink because i'm happy then it's an all-u-can-drink smorgasbord?

america needs to drop the puritanical zealotry.

it's farking alcohol, not a deal with the devil. drink wine with your wife. happy, sad, who gives a shiat. wine tastes good, and in sufficient quantities, brings about all the effects of drunkenness.

the only time alcohol becomes a problem is if you can't deal with your other depressions such that you abuse alcohol to fark up your responsibilities, obligations, and other good things in life.

some degree of self-awareness will answer any question as to whether you're doing fine or you're burning the candle at both ends.

how about i drink a virtual beer with u


cheers.

/ this is one of those points in time were I may have posted in error... I didn't realize to whom I was replying, and I've learned before to be wary of taking you too seriously.
 
2012-12-11 05:53:42 PM  

PrivateCaboose: Mimic_Octopus: PrivateCaboose: Mimic_Octopus: ftfa : "If you're having four beers on Friday night, see how you do with two beers."

it's impossible to take these clowns seriously when they spew this puritanical bullshiat. 2 farking beers on a friday night ? i have 2 beers before i summit a farking 12000 ft mountain, assshole. i have 12- 15 beers on a friday after a week's work. and 2-6 every night between.

save this shiat for the people that are blacking out and beating their kids.

Jesus Christ that's a lot of calories.

6' 175. consume several thousand calories per day, burn as many or more between walking to work, using stairs not elevator and hitting the gym on lunch break, then hiking or snowboarding on weekends

Idk, I ride my bike into work and hit the gym daily but an extra 300 calories a day would still make me chubby. Easiest way I've found to drop weight is to drop booze.

Being a chick sucks.


Men require more calories than women so it doesn't have the same impact on us as it does on you.

Being a dude rocks.
 
2012-12-11 05:54:10 PM  
That test is a farking joke.
 
2012-12-11 05:56:05 PM  
I scored a 4. I'm 49 and have been winding down on drinking for a while. I can't drink like I used to. I experimented with adding an occasional blackout to the score and it went up to 5. I don't ever drink enough for that, but was curious. I've been around AAers who claim any blackouts are an irrefutable sign of alcoholisms so I was surprised that it only added one point.

My son says that AA teaches you to see the alcoholic in everyone. Seems about right.
 
2012-12-11 05:56:43 PM  

ReapTheChaos: That test is a farking joke.


can u pass teh acid test??
 
2012-12-11 05:57:05 PM  

TheDirtyNacho: punkhippie: TheDirtyNacho: Many people are genetically inclined to be addicted to something.

Horseshiat. There is simply zero credible, scientifically valid evidence for this statement. And you know they've been looking for a long ass time.

Better let the APA know, Doc.

These guys too

Or you know what, here


APA was relentlessly lobbied by steppers to have addiction declared a disease, so that doesn't mean much. And sure, you can find studies claiming a genetic link - you can find studies that claim anything. Show me hundreds of them that all show similar results and then you'll convince me.

Science, motherfarker.
 
2012-12-11 05:57:24 PM  
Wait since alcoholism is considered a disease, you either have it or don't. There's no such thing as a almost disease. Is there?

/right?
 
2012-12-11 05:58:47 PM  

umad: PrivateCaboose: Mimic_Octopus: PrivateCaboose: Mimic_Octopus: ftfa : "If you're having four beers on Friday night, see how you do with two beers."

it's impossible to take these clowns seriously when they spew this puritanical bullshiat. 2 farking beers on a friday night ? i have 2 beers before i summit a farking 12000 ft mountain, assshole. i have 12- 15 beers on a friday after a week's work. and 2-6 every night between.

save this shiat for the people that are blacking out and beating their kids.

Jesus Christ that's a lot of calories.

6' 175. consume several thousand calories per day, burn as many or more between walking to work, using stairs not elevator and hitting the gym on lunch break, then hiking or snowboarding on weekends

Idk, I ride my bike into work and hit the gym daily but an extra 300 calories a day would still make me chubby. Easiest way I've found to drop weight is to drop booze.

Being a chick sucks.

Men require more calories than women so it doesn't have the same impact on us as it does on you.

Being a dude rocks.


calories in = calories out in a perfect world
but NOO people are gay and eat to much, drink to much beer, etc..
creating a WORLD of alcoholics
 
2012-12-11 05:59:45 PM  

Nightshade50: Wait since alcoholism is considered a disease, you either have it or don't. There's no such thing as a almost disease. Is there?

/right?


u can get tested for the disease by going to a bar and getting brethaylysted
if ur sober u pass
if ur drunk u get stoned

then that's teh cure
 
2012-12-11 05:59:58 PM  

umad: Men require more calories than women so it doesn't have the same impact on us as it does on you.

Being a dude rocks.


It also takes us more beers to get drunk, and more steak to get full. I think it probably evens out except for the grocery bill.
 
2012-12-11 06:01:48 PM  
TFA:

Dr. Doyle suggests, "If you're having four beers on Friday night, see how you do with two beers."

I'm on vacation. I didn't drink yesterday because I only had 7 beers in the house. Why the fark would someone only drink 4 beers?

/may have problem
 
2012-12-11 06:02:14 PM  
Guess I'll switch to pot, then.
 
2012-12-11 06:02:18 PM  

homelessdude: I scored 40
...
Can I audition for Intervention?
...



Research material: How to Ace an Intervention.
 
2012-12-11 06:02:22 PM  

pute kisses like a man: Jon iz teh kewl: pute kisses like a man: Jon iz teh kewl: PrivateCaboose: Jon iz teh kewl: Citrate1007: Jon iz teh kewl: alcoholism is only a problem if the user is violent
case closed

Neglected children beg to differ.

why are you drinking if your married?

if i get married i'm never drinking again because i'd be honestly happy

Marriage doesn't automagically make someone happy. And if you drink because you're unhappy, that's pretty much the first sign you have a problem.

but if i drink because i'm happy then it's an all-u-can-drink smorgasbord?

america needs to drop the puritanical zealotry.

it's farking alcohol, not a deal with the devil. drink wine with your wife. happy, sad, who gives a shiat. wine tastes good, and in sufficient quantities, brings about all the effects of drunkenness.

the only time alcohol becomes a problem is if you can't deal with your other depressions such that you abuse alcohol to fark up your responsibilities, obligations, and other good things in life.

some degree of self-awareness will answer any question as to whether you're doing fine or you're burning the candle at both ends.

how about i drink a virtual beer with u

cheers.

/ this is one of those points in time were I may have posted in error... I didn't realize to whom I was replying, and I've learned before to be wary of taking you too seriously.


yes.
 
2012-12-11 06:02:59 PM  
Does a 22 count as one drinks or two?
Need an answer soonish...

\arrogant bastard, if it matters.
 
2012-12-11 06:03:31 PM  
Is it the difference between this and this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ZpslnTPilY
 
2012-12-11 06:05:35 PM  

punkhippie: TheDirtyNacho: punkhippie: TheDirtyNacho: Many people are genetically inclined to be addicted to something.

Horseshiat. There is simply zero credible, scientifically valid evidence for this statement. And you know they've been looking for a long ass time.

Better let the APA know, Doc.

These guys too

Or you know what, here

APA was relentlessly lobbied by steppers to have addiction declared a disease, so that doesn't mean much. And sure, you can find studies claiming a genetic link - you can find studies that claim anything. Show me hundreds of them that all show similar results and then you'll convince me.

Science, motherfarker.



I guess you didn't click the last link.

Or, you know, you could easily just google 'addiction genetics'. It's very well known and studied to the point I suggest you come up with proof of your own view that would seem to be opposed by many.
 
2012-12-11 06:05:47 PM  
alcohol is one of the safest drugs out there. next to wellbutrin and butt sex
 
2012-12-11 06:07:33 PM  
I came here to see pictures of David Tennant and Matt Smith with witty captions. I am leaving sorely disappointed.

Phrozen

/yes, I know *I* could have posted some
//that's not what I came here for
 
2012-12-11 06:10:00 PM  

pute kisses like a man: cheers.

/ this is one of those points in time were I may have posted in error... I didn't realize to whom I was replying, and I've learned before to be wary of taking you too seriously.



a disclaimer on FARK, i never thought of that.
 
2012-12-11 06:11:40 PM  
Felt strange taking that test while drinking a bourbon.

Took it twice because some of the answers didn't fit exactly. Averaged a 7.
 
2012-12-11 06:13:37 PM  
Happily I have put away the hooch 6 mos. ago, tobacco free since Halloween.....just a sniff of wine with dinner now and again and a beer on Sundays.....I'm practically a fricking saint....do feel better and sleep better...my Dr. is very happy about the BP numbers....so, there ya go.
 
2012-12-11 06:13:38 PM  
the only consequence of my drinking is an enlarged bustline.

why not make a survey of "are u an obese fatty"
 
2012-12-11 06:14:02 PM  
Scored a nine. It would be higher but I can't afford to abuse my liver like I do my penis
 
2012-12-11 06:14:11 PM  
I've heard you can square your number of allowed drinks for every child in the household under the age of 2. So I am in like Flynn.
 
2012-12-11 06:14:28 PM  
15. Hmm...
 
2012-12-11 06:15:13 PM  

robbiex0r: 14

*shrug*


same here, same shrug.
 
2012-12-11 06:18:50 PM  

not_an_indigo: Guess I'll switch to pot, then.


Funny thing is when I used to smoke once a day a 12 pack would last me a week.

/replace one with the other
 
2012-12-11 06:20:59 PM  

Jon iz teh kewl: why not make a survey of "are u an almost obese fatty"

 
2012-12-11 06:24:25 PM  
26...and I am definitely an alcoholic...
 
2012-12-11 06:24:53 PM  
speaking of wine. Pinot Grigio + cold meds = fun night on Fark.
 
2012-12-11 06:28:16 PM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: I don't drink, myself.

I'm just fine being the perpetual designated driver.


That's fine. We'll pay you nicely for carting our asses around.

Idk, I ride my bike into work and hit the gym daily but an extra 300 calories a day would still make me chubby. Easiest way I've found to drop weight is to drop booze.

Being a chick sucks.


Define that 300. Which ever one of you said that, you need to kill your trainer. He or she is getting paid to tell you that. But then, that's what you like, isn't it? SAY IT. YES, SIR!
 
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