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(ABC)   Fundamental Christian nutjob claims to have evidence that Noah's biblical flood actually happened. Sorry, did I say "fundamental Christian nutjob"? I meant "acclaimed maritime archaeologist"   (abcnews.go.com) divider line 148
    More: Interesting, Bibles, shipwrecks, Noah's Ark, Christiane Amanpour, submersibles, carbon datings, meltwaters, traumatic event  
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5828 clicks; posted to Geek » on 10 Dec 2012 at 8:37 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-10 04:19:04 PM  
Aside from a few details, like the flood being a relatively local/regional one.
 
2012-12-10 04:29:24 PM  
"based on real events" is not the same as "actually happened"

Ballard has mor eor less conclusively proved there was a catastrophic flood that brought the water of the Med into the black sea. The Black Sea's unusual composition, salt water on top, fresh water farther down really can't be easily explained any other way. Morevover, I personally believe that the reason almost every culture on earth has a "flood story" is because there WERE catastrophic global floods all over the world, just not all at once the way the bible tells it. Go look at a map of Ice Age Europe and then look at it again after the glaciers melted. The English channel, for example used to be a land bridge. Futher We know people lived on that land bridge becuase, just like Ballard did in the Black Sea, we've found evidence of villages and human habitations at the bottom of the channel. So yeah, since people do tend to live near the water (look at a poulation map of the world even today) and the water levels dramatically rose over a few hundred year stretch. I have no doubt it was traumatic experience for nearly every human on earth and was enshrined in all sorts of story-telling traditions
 
2012-12-10 04:30:17 PM  
Is anyone else getting this on the side?
 
25.media.tumblr.com 
 
2012-12-10 04:34:02 PM  

James!: Is anyone else getting this on the side?
 
[25.media.tumblr.com image 357x425]


One of those stories is not like the others.
 
2012-12-10 04:43:35 PM  

wxboy: James!: Is anyone else getting this on the side?
 
[25.media.tumblr.com image 357x425]

One of those stories is not like the others.


I don't know - they all involve somebody getting screwed.
 
2012-12-10 04:46:12 PM  

naughtyrev: wxboy: James!: Is anyone else getting this on the side?
 
[25.media.tumblr.com image 357x425]

One of those stories is not like the others.

I don't know - they all involve somebody getting screwed.


Niiice.
 
2012-12-10 04:48:56 PM  
I dont think anyone would say there wasn't a flood. I think the main point is getting all the animals in a boat and successfully breeding a whole populations off two animals.
 
2012-12-10 04:49:09 PM  

Magorn: "based on real events" is not the same as "actually happened"

Ballard has mor eor less conclusively proved there was a catastrophic flood that brought the water of the Med into the black sea. The Black Sea's unusual composition, salt water on top, fresh water farther down really can't be easily explained any other way. Morevover, I personally believe that the reason almost every culture on earth has a "flood story" is because there WERE catastrophic global floods all over the world, just not all at once the way the bible tells it. Go look at a map of Ice Age Europe and then look at it again after the glaciers melted. The English channel, for example used to be a land bridge. Futher We know people lived on that land bridge becuase, just like Ballard did in the Black Sea, we've found evidence of villages and human habitations at the bottom of the channel. So yeah, since people do tend to live near the water (look at a poulation map of the world even today) and the water levels dramatically rose over a few hundred year stretch. I have no doubt it was traumatic experience for nearly every human on earth and was enshrined in all sorts of story-telling traditions


geocurrents.info

The largest waterfall ever to have existed came over this ledge. The Missoula floods would have been awesome to behold.

And yet, no one calls them "global." Because, you know, they were "regional."
 
2012-12-10 04:50:28 PM  

Magorn: "based on real events" is not the same as "actually happened"

Ballard has mor eor less conclusively proved there was a catastrophic flood that brought the water of the Med into the black sea. The Black Sea's unusual composition, salt water on top, fresh water farther down really can't be easily explained any other way. Morevover, I personally believe that the reason almost every culture on earth has a "flood story" is because there WERE catastrophic global floods all over the world, just not all at once the way the bible tells it. Go look at a map of Ice Age Europe and then look at it again after the glaciers melted. The English channel, for example used to be a land bridge. Futher We know people lived on that land bridge becuase, just like Ballard did in the Black Sea, we've found evidence of villages and human habitations at the bottom of the channel. So yeah, since people do tend to live near the water (look at a poulation map of the world even today) and the water levels dramatically rose over a few hundred year stretch. I have no doubt it was traumatic experience for nearly every human on earth and was enshrined in all sorts of story-telling traditions


So really he just proved the bible's authors had no imagination.
 
2012-12-10 04:51:16 PM  
Um, welcome to 1995?

This is not news. It's interesting, but this it's been posited that the Black Sea was once dry land for at least 15 years now.
 
2012-12-10 04:56:22 PM  
1) since humans needed water- many settled by rivers, lakes and oceans

2) natural occuring floods would happen- wiping out towns and cities. People remember shiat like this- and write it down.

3) stories would be embellished: flood story in Geglimesh and then co-opted by Genisis.
 
2012-12-10 04:56:52 PM  
Big flood: plausible.
Flood covering entire surface of earth: no.
600 year old dude creating boat big enough to carry two of every species on earth except waterfowl and fish: no
600 year old dude's family repopulating entire earth: nope!
Deity with seriously bad attitude bullshiatting Noah about the whole rainbow thing "Um, yeah...I put that there as a promise I won't ever flood you and kill everything on earth again. No, srsly. It's magic -- nothing to do with diffraction"
 
2012-12-10 04:58:22 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: I dont think anyone would say there wasn't a flood. I think the main point is getting all the animals in a boat and successfully breeding a whole populations off two animals.


See, that's why I'm excited about the new Noah's Ark museum thing Kentucky or Tennessee or wherever. Because they are going to be arguing that Noah only had "types" from which all modern animals descended - so there was an Ur-dog and so on and so forth, and only in the last few thousand years have all the others developed and with such a range of genetic diversity. But don't you dare call that evolution!
 
2012-12-10 05:00:36 PM  
Yeah, not a new idea at all, remember talking about this in a religious studies class around 2000.
 
2012-12-10 05:02:53 PM  
So he says nothing about rain for 40 days and 40 nights, nothing about two of every species on a boat, just that there was a huge-ass flood back in those times.

I can accept that.
 
2012-12-10 05:06:19 PM  
Ri-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ght.
 
2012-12-10 05:14:33 PM  

make me some tea: Um, welcome to 1995?

This is not news. It's interesting, but this it's been posited that the Black Sea was once dry land for at least 15 years now.


I was just popping in to say I say this on a Dicovery/History/National Geographic show back in the days before all they aired was Ice Road Crab Fishing Antique Pawn Shops
 
2012-12-10 05:21:18 PM  
"Gilga---mesh..."
 
2012-12-10 05:25:42 PM  

trivial use of my dark powers: Ri-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ght.


What's a cubit?

/vwoopa, vwoopa, vwoopa....
 
2012-12-10 05:31:44 PM  

AdolfOliverPanties: So he says nothing about rain for 40 days and 40 nights, nothing about two of every species on a boat, just that there was a huge-ass flood back in those times.

I can accept that.


His story is plausible and he plans to go back next year; bottom line, he needs funding.
 
2012-12-10 05:46:25 PM  
I have a hobby - I enjoy deconstructing every biblical tale into a more reasonable tale that could have feasibly happened, but was embellished greatly over the years.

Noah's Ark? Some dude with a boat saved two of his sheep during a flood, then used them to replenish his herd.

David and Goliath? This one doesn't even need deconstructing. A little guy killed a big guy by hitting him in the head with a rock thrown at high speeds.

Every cycle of "punishment" and "restoration" of the Hebrew people? Pretty common "we got our shiat kicked only because WE WEREN'T PIOUS ENOUGH!" See: The entire republican party, November 7th.

Moses? A crazy guy who knew a single path over a river incited a riot, ran away with a bunch of slaves, the people who pursued him didn't know the path over the river, got killed chasing them.

Mary? Uh, yeah. Do I really need to point out that it's far more likely one stupid had his wife cheat on him, then lie about it, rather than the motherfarking almighty swooping down to impregnate some random chick?

/this is why my family stopped sending me bibles for christmas.
 
2012-12-10 05:48:37 PM  

Ennuipoet: make me some tea: Um, welcome to 1995?

This is not news. It's interesting, but this it's been posited that the Black Sea was once dry land for at least 15 years now.

I was just popping in to say I say this on a Dicovery/History/National Geographic show back in the days before all they aired was Ice Road Crab Fishing Antique Pawn Shops


Indeed. A former high school classmate of mine was on the expedition with Ballard where they initially discovered the ancient beaches with DSRVs. That was in the '90s.
 
2012-12-10 05:49:10 PM  

naughtyrev: The Stealth Hippopotamus: I dont think anyone would say there wasn't a flood. I think the main point is getting all the animals in a boat and successfully breeding a whole populations off two animals.

See, that's why I'm excited about the new Noah's Ark museum thing Kentucky or Tennessee or wherever. Because they are going to be arguing that Noah only had "types" from which all modern animals descended - so there was an Ur-dog and so on and so forth, and only in the last few thousand years have all the others developed and with such a range of genetic diversity. But don't you dare call that evolution!


Answers from Genesis is awesome - their song "Misunderstanding" is dope as fark.
 
2012-12-10 05:50:44 PM  
No one disputes there was a historical "Great Flood", Submitter. At least regionally.

Wake me when there is scientific consensus that the limestone containing marine fossils found at the summit of the Himalayas was deposited there by a global flood, as creationists idiotically claim.
 
2012-12-10 05:52:25 PM  

Elzar: naughtyrev: The Stealth Hippopotamus: I dont think anyone would say there wasn't a flood. I think the main point is getting all the animals in a boat and successfully breeding a whole populations off two animals.

See, that's why I'm excited about the new Noah's Ark museum thing Kentucky or Tennessee or wherever. Because they are going to be arguing that Noah only had "types" from which all modern animals descended - so there was an Ur-dog and so on and so forth, and only in the last few thousand years have all the others developed and with such a range of genetic diversity. But don't you dare call that evolution!

Answers from Genesis is awesome - their song "Misunderstanding" is dope as fark.


lawl.
 
2012-12-10 05:54:34 PM  
So therefore Sarah Palin is automatically President?
 
2012-12-10 05:57:19 PM  
i believe the babylonian epic of gilgamesh describes a flood prior to the advent of the bible. it's likely there was some sort of large flood "back in the day." this in no way proves the biblical version of the flood.
 
2012-12-10 06:05:42 PM  
*bing*

NOAH...
 
2012-12-10 06:14:18 PM  
Tune in to Christiane Amanpour's two-part ABC News special, "Back to the Beginning,"

I stopped reading there, since this wasn't "news" as much as "advertising"
 
2012-12-10 06:20:12 PM  

Coolfusis: I have a hobby - I enjoy deconstructing every biblical tale into a more reasonable tale that could have feasibly happened, but was embellished greatly over the years.

Noah's Ark? Some dude with a boat saved two of his sheep during a flood, then used them to replenish his herd.

David and Goliath? This one doesn't even need deconstructing. A little guy killed a big guy by hitting him in the head with a rock thrown at high speeds.

Every cycle of "punishment" and "restoration" of the Hebrew people? Pretty common "we got our shiat kicked only because WE WEREN'T PIOUS ENOUGH!" See: The entire republican party, November 7th.

Moses? A crazy guy who knew a single path over a river incited a riot, ran away with a bunch of slaves, the people who pursued him didn't know the path over the river, got killed chasing them.

Mary? Uh, yeah. Do I really need to point out that it's far more likely one stupid had his wife cheat on him, then lie about it, rather than the motherfarking almighty swooping down to impregnate some random chick?

/this is why my family stopped sending me bibles for christmas.


For a Hobby, you think you'd be better at it. A river? Really? Do you even the Red Sea?
 
2012-12-10 06:39:02 PM  

doglover: Do you even the Red Sea?


Yes - the whole thing up.
 
2012-12-10 06:41:50 PM  

Elzar: doglover: Do you even the Red Sea?

Yes - the whole thing up.


Accidentally?
 
2012-12-10 06:45:12 PM  

FlashHarry: i believe the babylonian epic of gilgamesh describes a flood prior to the advent of the bible. it's likely there was some sort of large flood "back in the day." this in no way proves the biblical version of the flood.


All the ancients had tales of great disasters, floods, etc. It's almost as if earth changes happened before the flourocarbons and such.
 
2012-12-10 06:49:59 PM  
A regional flood event that spawned enduring oral myths that became the Epic of Gilgamesh and eventually rewritten and included in the bible as Noah and the Ark is now being explored in a ABC TV special with Christiane Amanpour and the guy who sent robots down into the Titanic a couple years back?

Meh, prolly more interesting than one of those "Did we just find the Ark?" ones I suppose.
 
2012-12-10 06:55:13 PM  

doglover: Do you even the Red Sea?


No, but I did once the Reed Sea.
 
2012-12-10 06:55:21 PM  
Same difference, Subby.
 
2012-12-10 07:08:31 PM  
Noah's biblical flood is not restricted to Noah or the bible.

That the myth may have origins in fact is not new.

IOW, move along, nothing to see here.
 
2012-12-10 07:29:33 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: I dont think anyone would say there wasn't a flood. I think the main point is getting all the animals in a boat and successfully breeding a whole populations off two animals.


And maybe it wasn't that directly--perhaps, G_d, who's a clever, slightly patronizing fellow, tells Noah "Listen here, Noah. I'm sparing you and your family, so you're gonna save all the animals. Just gather up two of every animal you can find and bring them onto your ark. Then you can use them to replenish the world!"

So then G_d then goes about his business preparing for the flood, and just as he's ready to throw the swtich--Damn! There's Noah, with a steady stream of animals being herded on the ark."

"Huh," G_d thinks. "He went and did it. Two of every animal he could find. Good boy, Noah. Well...a promise is a promise."

And the earth's fauna were replenished.

Right? I mean, you wouldn't just depend upon an ordinary scientific explanation for this detail when the story features a starring role played by the mysterious and omnipotent Lord Almighty, right?
 
2012-12-10 07:33:53 PM  

doglover: Coolfusis: I have a hobby - I enjoy deconstructing every biblical tale into a more reasonable tale that could have feasibly happened, but was embellished greatly over the years.

Noah's Ark? Some dude with a boat saved two of his sheep during a flood, then used them to replenish his herd.

David and Goliath? This one doesn't even need deconstructing. A little guy killed a big guy by hitting him in the head with a rock thrown at high speeds.

Every cycle of "punishment" and "restoration" of the Hebrew people? Pretty common "we got our shiat kicked only because WE WEREN'T PIOUS ENOUGH!" See: The entire republican party, November 7th.

Moses? A crazy guy who knew a single path over a river incited a riot, ran away with a bunch of slaves, the people who pursued him didn't know the path over the river, got killed chasing them.

Mary? Uh, yeah. Do I really need to point out that it's far more likely one stupid had his wife cheat on him, then lie about it, rather than the motherfarking almighty swooping down to impregnate some random chick?

/this is why my family stopped sending me bibles for christmas.

For a Hobby, you think you'd be better at it. A river? Really? Do you even the Red Sea?


Whoops, got my biblical bodies of water mixed up. I shall now commit seppuku to atone for my great shame.
 
2012-12-10 07:46:14 PM  
The sheer air pressure from that much water in the atmosphere would turn every creature on Earth into a fine paste.
 
2012-12-10 07:57:25 PM  

BravadoGT: "Huh," G_d thinks. "He went and did it. Two of every animal he could find. Good boy, Noah. Well...a promise is a promise."


But I thought god was omniscient. Why would he have been surprised?
 
2012-12-10 08:01:07 PM  

ShawnDoc: BravadoGT: "Huh," G_d thinks. "He went and did it. Two of every animal he could find. Good boy, Noah. Well...a promise is a promise."

But I thought god was omniscient. Why would he have been surprised?


That answer depends if you're think like a Calvinist or not.
 
2012-12-10 08:23:56 PM  

make me some tea: Um, welcome to 1995?

This is not news. It's interesting, but this it's been posited that the Black Sea was once dry land for at least 15 years now.


Hell, the Mediterranean used to be dry land. The flood when the Atlantic broke through at Gibraltar would be epic to go back and watch.
 
2012-12-10 08:40:20 PM  

GAT_00: make me some tea: Um, welcome to 1995?

This is not news. It's interesting, but this it's been posited that the Black Sea was once dry land for at least 15 years now.

Hell, the Mediterranean used to be dry land. The flood when the Atlantic broke through at Gibraltar would be epic to go back and watch.


Yeah it definitely would be a helluva sight.
 
2012-12-10 08:49:13 PM  

Coolfusis: Mary? Uh, yeah. Do I really need to point out that it's far more likely one stupid had his wife cheat on him, then lie about it, rather than the motherfarking almighty swooping down to impregnate some random chick?


Too bad she lied about it instead of getting an abortion.
 
2012-12-10 08:51:38 PM  

Coolfusis: Moses? A crazy guy who knew a single path over a river incited a riot, ran away with a bunch of slaves, the people who pursued him didn't know the path over the river, got killed chasing them.


also to consider- moses had a group of fleeing civilian slaves. the guys following were wearing armor, carrying weapons and kit and have chariot cavalry and wagon trains. moses cuts across a muddy sandbar in a shallow section and no way an army follows him.
 
2012-12-10 08:52:12 PM  
Fundamental Christian nutjob claims to have evidence that Noah's biblical flood actually happened. writes misleading headline.
 
2012-12-10 08:55:58 PM  
Ballard's track record for finding the impossible is well known. In 1985, using a robotic submersible equipped with remote-controlled cameras, Ballard and his crew hunted down the world's most famous shipwreck, the Titanic.

So... finding something with a well-known location that had been previously located by sonar is "finding the impossible"? Not that the submersible robots aren't cool, but come on, it was hardly an obscure treasure hunt rooted in arcane knowledge and clever puzzles, it was just a matter of throwing money at a simple problem until they got something that worked.
 
2012-12-10 08:56:53 PM  
Let me clear it up for you, Submittard. The "acclaimed maritime archeologists" say that there were local floods that gave rise to various myths. The "fundamentalist Christian nut jobs" say that there was a flood that covered the entire world, wiped out everyone on earth except 8 multi hundred year old people, and explains everything that makes the earth look older than 6000 years, including the Grand Canyon.

So that's the minor difference there.
 
2012-12-10 08:59:29 PM  

GAT_00: Hell, the Mediterranean used to be dry land. The flood when the Atlantic broke through at Gibraltar would be epic to go back and watch.


Maybe not so epic. But still cool.
 
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