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(Standard Digital (Kenya))   Cash-strapped Swaziland urged to hike witch-doctor tax, conservatives still in favor of just burning them at the stake   (standardmedia.co.ke) divider line 50
    More: Strange, Swaziland, interests, Swaziland urged  
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2022 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Dec 2012 at 2:51 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-10 12:07:42 PM
Unfortunately the Witch Doctors probably won't be able to organize any real support against raising this tax, since their most compelling anti-taxation argument is 'Oo, eee, oooh ahh ahh, ting, tang, walla walla bing bang'
 
2012-12-10 01:09:41 PM
ionenewsone.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-12-10 01:36:11 PM

L.D. Ablo: [ionenewsone.files.wordpress.com image 300x444]


And speaking of (non-PSed) Kenyan witchdoctors...

my2bucks.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-12-10 02:15:09 PM
Representatives of Ting, Tang, Walla, Walla, Bing and Bang refused to comment.
 
2012-12-10 02:52:59 PM
But the little clocks they make are so adorable! And the cheese.... plus don't they have a lot of hydro power, and Nazi gold? How can they be strapped for cash?
 
2012-12-10 02:54:26 PM
Well if they can hike that means they have boots, and boots have straps, straps you can pull yourself up by.
 
2012-12-10 02:55:23 PM

MemeSlave: But the little clocks they make are so adorable! And the cheese.... plus don't they have a lot of hydro power, and Nazi gold? How can they be strapped for cash?


*shakes tiny fist of rage*
 
2012-12-10 02:56:00 PM

Diogenes: L.D. Ablo: [ionenewsone.files.wordpress.com image 300x444]

And speaking of (non-PSed) Kenyan witchdoctors...


Lulz
 
2012-12-10 02:58:28 PM
I'm confused... which Doctor?

www.bbc.co.uk
 
2012-12-10 02:59:24 PM
Just sell more Cheese and Watches. Christ.
 
2012-12-10 03:02:33 PM
I'm feeling kind of neutral about this plan.
 
2012-12-10 03:06:16 PM
Reportedly the witch doctors responded with "OOH! EEE! OOH AH AH! BING! BANG! WALLA WALLA BING BANG!!!!"
 
2012-12-10 03:06:53 PM
Aw, crap, I'm a good 15 posts too late. Oh well.
 
2012-12-10 03:08:45 PM
Arise chicken, ARISE!
/got nothing...
 
2012-12-10 03:09:20 PM
Laugh all you want, but we've got witch doctors here in the states. They call themselves homeopaths, herbalists, and naturopaths.
 
2012-12-10 03:12:25 PM
Just the top Tutu percent.
 
2012-12-10 03:12:43 PM
Damn good thing I always click the article first.

I was trying to figure out when Patrick Swayze got his own country
 
2012-12-10 03:15:44 PM

cwolf20: Damn good thing I always click the article first.

I was trying to figure out when Patrick Swayze got his own country


i.chzbgr.com
 
2012-12-10 03:17:19 PM
So are the Three Stooges. Doesn't change that I read Swayze into Subby's headline
 
2012-12-10 03:19:08 PM

Onkel Buck: Well if they can hike that means they have boots, and boots have straps, straps you can pull yourself up by.


Was there passing out shoes to kids last year. No boots. There are a bunch of emergency feeding stations for the kids. You can feed the kids a meal of beans & rice for 11 cents a day. "American kids can't compete... you know how much a McGriddle costs!" Saw a 7 year old walking a toddler and carrying a baby to one feeding station. Not much chance for agriculture, the rivers are diverted for agriculture in South Africa. They don't have much. There's dirt, some aloe plants and a tree that will make you go blind (Euphorbia).

Link
 
2012-12-10 03:26:42 PM
King of Swaziland worth over $200 million and has a dozen +-2 wives

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2012-12-10 03:29:25 PM

Deep Contact: King of Swaziland worth over $200 million and has a dozen +-2 wives

[upload.wikimedia.org image 220x330]


And nice tits.
 
2012-12-10 03:30:41 PM
How can they be broke with all the skiing and banking that goes on there?
 
2012-12-10 03:32:57 PM
because if they raise taxes just ooooonnnnnneeeeee more time, then the government will have enough money and all will be well...
 
2012-12-10 03:49:20 PM
Conservative Swaziland Radio Commentator Rush Mbumbu said earlier:

"Why is the government always going after the zombie creators? Don't you know that hire taxes will drive these important engines of our economy away? Without them, where will the cheap labor come from and who will pick the crops at the dark of the night?

The witch doctor group is not one to be trifled with. They are a powerful force in this country. I try to stay as bipartisan as possible, but a witch doctor once disagreed with me and cursed me. He caused me to bloat about the waist and lust after little boys."
 
2012-12-10 03:50:48 PM

Rufus Lee King: Deep Contact: King of Swaziland worth over $200 million

That's a whole mess of emalangeni!

[www.bestourism.com image 559x257]


24.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-12-10 03:53:47 PM
ChipNASA

Deep Contact: King of Swaziland worth over $200 million and has a dozen +-2 wives

[upload.wikimedia.org image 220x330]

And nice tits.


And he's a belt and suspenders kind of guy. But they don't seem to help.
 
2012-12-10 03:58:15 PM
For once I agree with the Conservatives on this.
 
2012-12-10 03:59:38 PM

Harry Freakstorm: ChipNASA

Deep Contact: King of Swaziland worth over $200 million and has a dozen +-2 wives

[upload.wikimedia.org image 220x330]

And nice tits.

And he's a belt and suspenders kind of guy. But they don't seem to help.


*CLAP CLAP* "WIPERS!!!"
assets0.ordienetworks.com


/Thanks for the TF HF!!!!
 
2012-12-10 04:00:02 PM
Deep Contact: King of Swaziland worth over $200 million and has a dozen +-2 wives

Guy looks like he'd need a bigger bra than what his wives would probably wear, if they wear bras that is.
 
2012-12-10 04:04:32 PM

cwolf20: Damn good thing I always click the article first.

I was trying to figure out when Patrick Swayze got his own country


I thought it would be bigger.
 
2012-12-10 04:06:17 PM

Deep Contact: King of Swaziland worth over $200 million and has a dozen +-2 wives

[upload.wikimedia.org image 220x330]


www.celluloidheroreviews.com
 
2012-12-10 04:10:15 PM
What Swatch Doctors of Switzerland may look like.

i262.photobucket.com
 
2012-12-10 04:10:22 PM
The gov't of Swaziland is just doing this to distract from its crippling cuckoo clock production deficit and its hot cocoa scandal.
 
2012-12-10 04:11:10 PM
People there have the lowest life expectancy of any country in the world. They shouldn't tax witch doctors, they should make them go through mandatory AIDS education and prevention classes.
 
2012-12-10 04:12:32 PM

Harry Freakstorm: Conservative Swaziland Radio Commentator Rush Mbumbu said earlier:

"Why is the government always going after the zombie creators? Don't you know that hire taxes will drive these important engines of our economy away? Without them, where will the cheap labor come from and who will pick the crops at the dark of the night?

The witch doctor group is not one to be trifled with. They are a powerful force in this country. I try to stay as bipartisan as possible, but a witch doctor once disagreed with me and cursed me. He caused me to bloat about the waist and lust after little boys."


Wow. Just farking wow.
 
2012-12-10 04:29:22 PM
I wouldn't tax this guy. He'll shrink your friggin' head!

1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-12-10 04:32:04 PM
StoPPeRmobile: Harry Freakstorm: Conservative Swaziland Radio Commentator Rush Mbumbu said earlier:

"Why is the government always going after the zombie creators? Don't you know that hire taxes will drive these important engines of our economy away? Without them, where will the cheap labor come from and who will pick the crops at the dark of the night?

The witch doctor group is not one to be trifled with. They are a powerful force in this country. I try to stay as bipartisan as possible, but a witch doctor once disagreed with me and cursed me. He caused me to bloat about the waist and lust after little boys."

Wow. Just farking wow.


And that sound is the wind going over your head.
 
2012-12-10 04:33:45 PM

Contents Under Pressure: People there have the lowest life expectancy of any country in the world. They shouldn't tax witch doctors, they should make them go through mandatory AIDS education and prevention classes.


All that would do is give them more time to shiat out kids that they can't afford to take care of. What they need is sex-ed and finance classes. Until then I say they stick with the "making sex with a virgin will clear it right up" method.
 
2012-12-10 04:34:14 PM
Oh they're fine with witch doctors in Swaziland.

Just whatever you do, don't be teh ghey there... 

/unless you're female, in which case it's actually legal
//WTF? I'm guessing because there's nothing in the Bible that says it's a sin...? Plus dudes want to watch?
 
2012-12-10 04:45:47 PM

Contents Under Pressure: People there have the lowest life expectancy of any country in the world. They shouldn't tax witch doctors, they should make them go through mandatory AIDS education and prevention classes.


Met a woman who had a bone infection in her arm. The traditional healers had made shallow cuts all over her arm for years trying to cure it. She finally agreed to be treated by The Luke Commission mobile medical clinic.

If the AIDS rates continue as is, the estimates are that all the adults will be dead by 2030 to 2050.

The Luke Commission are my heroes. 2 people trying to save a country. They've conducted about 50 clinics a year all over the country for the past 6 years or so. Treating about 600 people per site.

Link
 
2012-12-10 04:48:17 PM
That's surprising coming from a country that is notorius for staying neutral, not to mention all of the banking concerns. 

/good chocolate too!
 
2012-12-10 05:06:57 PM
Swaziland witch doctors always have the best weed.
 
2012-12-10 05:27:30 PM

Latinwolf: Deep Contact: King of Swaziland worth over $200 million and has a dozen +-2 wives

Guy looks like he'd need a bigger bra than what his wives would probably wear, if they wear bras that is.


You can learn more about him (and see his 20-something daughter's boobs) in the documentary 'without the king'

Link
 
db2
2012-12-10 05:31:01 PM
"Swaziland" always makes me think of some kind of Nazi special ops.
 
2012-12-10 07:07:11 PM
The witch-doctor tax is bad enough as it is, and the cost is always passed on to the patient, which is already crippling with the price of pharmaceuticals going up and up. Do you think albino penis is cheap? It's not, my friend.
 
2012-12-10 07:24:50 PM
Witch doctor is going to be taxed again?
 
2012-12-10 09:40:26 PM

HailRobonia: I'm confused... which Doctor?


www.thememorist.com
 
2012-12-10 10:38:26 PM
So what does the government spend money on? Subsidized grass skirts and spears? I would guess that the tax would be raised by one newt's gizard, two bat wings and the brain of a traveling shoe salesman.
 
2012-12-11 11:34:11 AM
Swaziland totally sounds like a Dark Sun sorcerer-king state.
 
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