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(iVillage)   Family, friends are excited about Jessica Simpson's unexpected pregnancy. Execs at Weight Watchers? Not so much   (ivillage.com) divider line 27
    More: Followup, Weight Watchers, Jessica Simpson, kitchen gadget, iVillage  
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2829 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 10 Dec 2012 at 12:15 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



27 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-12-10 12:20:35 PM  
they should spin it positive... "she's lost so much weight on our plan that she's farkable again!"
 
2012-12-10 12:25:06 PM  
Se used to be soooo hot.
 
2012-12-10 12:30:24 PM  
She's in breach of contract, and should either abort or pay back the advance.

/banished several White Russians from my Kremlin over her
//then she got fat
///no vacancy
 
2012-12-10 12:30:56 PM  
I don't see why Weight Watchers would be upset. She lost 60 pounds the first time.

Push the contract back and show that you can just lose the weight again. Proving that it works twice would seem to be better than showing it work once.
 
2012-12-10 12:34:34 PM  

robohobo: Se used to be soooo hot.


I assume any gifs from the Dukes of Hazzard music video would be considered NSFW and shouldn't be posted inline, yes?
 
2012-12-10 12:37:23 PM  

grinding_journalist: robohobo: Se used to be soooo hot.

I assume any gifs from the Dukes of Hazzard music video would be considered NSFW and shouldn't be posted inline, yes?


Well, why don't you find out?
 
2012-12-10 12:39:05 PM  

bulldg4life: I don't see why Weight Watchers would be upset. She lost 60 pounds the first time.

Push the contract back and show that you can just lose the weight again. Proving that it works twice would seem to be better than showing it work once.


Also, Weight Watchers has a variation of the program for pregnant women. They could always spin in that way.
 
2012-12-10 12:39:15 PM  
I don't see why they can't alter the contract to take advantage of this. Give her a break for 9 months, then do a thing where she burns off the baby weight.
 
2012-12-10 12:41:38 PM  

SweetRoisinDubh: bulldg4life: I don't see why Weight Watchers would be upset. She lost 60 pounds the first time.

Push the contract back and show that you can just lose the weight again. Proving that it works twice would seem to be better than showing it work once.

Also, Weight Watchers has a variation of the program for pregnant women. They could always spin in that way.


Disregard. I read my source wrong.
 
2012-12-10 12:49:21 PM  

bulldg4life: I don't see why Weight Watchers would be upset. She lost 60 pounds the first time.

Push the contract back and show that you can just lose the weight again. Proving that it works twice would seem to be better than showing it work once.


Yeah. Something tells me she's going to be dropping kids like beer farts - Michelle Duggar style.
 
2012-12-10 12:53:01 PM  
She is like a delightful Christmas dumpling. Sure, to the unknowing it might look like two loaves of bread baking when she wears a pair of pumps... but she doesn't perspire like an ordinary woman. The extra sugar and bacon drippings actually crystallize on her skin like a twilight vampire. I was shrimping her toes one day after we shared a delicious seafood platter and her tootsies tasted like real shrimp. Her breast always look extra inviting when she is carrying our tiny spawn. Big fun bags filled with Eagle brand condensed milk. When I crave a Vietnamese coffee, I don't even have to leave our house!

Her skin is soft and buttery smooth. Jess tells me she will NEVER wrinkle as long as she continues to grow and stretch her skin and that knowledge soothes my inner child. Her farts are a tropical cornucopia and remind me of Indian Fruit Money House Blessing Spray. I love to enter her from behind and tickle the soles of her feet. When she begins to laugh uncontrollably, the waves of laughter begin initially as gentle ripples, but soon escalate to tremulous flesh waddles and I must hang on for my very life. Like a tiny monkey jockey riding a racing greyhound, I cling to her back. If I am extra lucky she rips a dainty feminine 'pootie' and not only are my loins are filled with warmth, but the subtle vibrations waffle over my very being as if a thousand forest faeries were pummeling my genitalia with their tiny fists.
www.adweek.com
Lose weight? Why would you seek to take away the very air I breathe.
 
2012-12-10 01:16:22 PM  

Dahnkster: She is like a delightful Christmas dumpling. Sure, to the unknowing it might look like two loaves of bread baking when she wears a pair of pumps... but she doesn't perspire like an ordinary woman. The extra sugar and bacon drippings actually crystallize on her skin like a twilight vampire. I was shrimping her toes one day after we shared a delicious seafood platter and her tootsies tasted like real shrimp. Her breast always look extra inviting when she is carrying our tiny spawn. Big fun bags filled with Eagle brand condensed milk. When I crave a Vietnamese coffee, I don't even have to leave our house!

Her skin is soft and buttery smooth. Jess tells me she will NEVER wrinkle as long as she continues to grow and stretch her skin and that knowledge soothes my inner child. Her farts are a tropical cornucopia and remind me of Indian Fruit Money House Blessing Spray. I love to enter her from behind and tickle the soles of her feet. When she begins to laugh uncontrollably, the waves of laughter begin initially as gentle ripples, but soon escalate to tremulous flesh waddles and I must hang on for my very life. Like a tiny monkey jockey riding a racing greyhound, I cling to her back. If I am extra lucky she rips a dainty feminine 'pootie' and not only are my loins are filled with warmth, but the subtle vibrations waffle over my very being as if a thousand forest faeries were pummeling my genitalia with their tiny fists.
[www.adweek.com image 484x272]
Lose weight? Why would you seek to take away the very air I breathe.


You sir owe me a new monitor and keyboard - lunch time orange chicken and rice is all over the place
 
2012-12-10 01:22:19 PM  
She's Irish?

Who knew?!?
 
2012-12-10 01:30:02 PM  
aloftyexistence.files.wordpress.com 

Bring me Solo and the wookie.
 
2012-12-10 01:34:07 PM  

Grapple: they should spin it positive... "she's lost so much weight on our plan that she's farkable again!"


"She lost so much weight with us, you'll actually notice the pregnancy!"
 
2012-12-10 01:40:32 PM  

SweetRoisinDubh: SweetRoisinDubh: bulldg4life: I don't see why Weight Watchers would be upset. She lost 60 pounds the first time.

Push the contract back and show that you can just lose the weight again. Proving that it works twice would seem to be better than showing it work once.

Also, Weight Watchers has a variation of the program for pregnant women. They could always spin in that way.

Disregard. I read my source wrong.


Yeah, they have a program for nursing moms, but if you're pregnant, you have to quit. I'm sure they don't want to deal with the liability.
 
2012-12-10 02:22:09 PM  

SweetRoisinDubh: SweetRoisinDubh: bulldg4life: I don't see why Weight Watchers would be upset. She lost 60 pounds the first time.

Push the contract back and show that you can just lose the weight again. Proving that it works twice would seem to be better than showing it work once.

Also, Weight Watchers has a variation of the program for pregnant women. They could always spin in that way.

Disregard. I read my source wrong.


When I first heard this I thought they should do "How to use our pregnancy program to gain a smart, reasonable ammount during your pregnancy, so you don't end up the size of a large sperm whale."
 
2012-12-10 02:23:34 PM  

Shenanigans!: Yeah, they have a program for nursing moms, but if you're pregnant, you have to quit. I'm sure they don't want to deal with the liability.


Well there's that. But everybody and their brother has an "Eating for Two" book out there, so I don't see why they would as long as you had to have your Dr sign off on the program.
 
2012-12-10 02:31:56 PM  

namegoeshere: Well there's that. But everybody and their brother has an "Eating for Two" book out there, so I don't see why they would as long as you had to have your Dr sign off on the program.


That's just it though -- while you are pregnant, you really need to follow your doctor's advice. Staff at Weight Watchers are not doctors -- just lifetime members. Thankfully they are responsible enough with their program to know that.

They'll help you after you've had the baby, and recommend you talk to your doctor during the pregnancy. Outside of that though, they can't advise you while you are pregnant. Too many risks.

/Weight Watchers facilitator
 
2012-12-10 04:22:30 PM  

Shenanigans!: SweetRoisinDubh: SweetRoisinDubh: bulldg4life: I don't see why Weight Watchers would be upset. She lost 60 pounds the first time.

Push the contract back and show that you can just lose the weight again. Proving that it works twice would seem to be better than showing it work once.

Also, Weight Watchers has a variation of the program for pregnant women. They could always spin in that way.

Disregard. I read my source wrong.

Yeah, they have a program for nursing moms, but if you're pregnant, you have to quit. I'm sure they don't want to deal with the liability.


Yeah, that's what I read and, for some reason, immediately thought, "Breast feeding = pregnant." I'm on the program (regular, not breast feeding) myself. I remembered being asked if I was pregnant when I signed up. I think that led me to assume that they had a program for it.
 
Skr
2012-12-10 05:15:19 PM  
FTA "It definitely wasn't planned. But yes, Jessica is pregnant again,"

meh if you are farking unprotected, the kid might as well be 'planned'. out of sight out mind doesn't really work for the wee little swimmers.

Anyways I figure shedding off baby weight again would be an added boon for her spokeswoman ship at weight watchers.
I'm wondering if the meals they recommend are healthy enough for a lady with child.
 
2012-12-10 08:05:25 PM  
That's a big healthy girl right there. She could snap most Farkers in two, I suspect. If we could get them away from their 3D printers long enough to notice a woman.
 
2012-12-10 08:12:30 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: That's a big healthy girl right there. She could snap most Farkers in two, I suspect. If we could get them away from their 3D printers long enough to notice a woman.


Nope, I'm too busy 3D printing my magic life extension technology. Then there'll be time to notice girls.
 
2012-12-11 08:41:52 PM  

Dingleberry Dickwad: Quantum Apostrophe: That's a big healthy girl right there. She could snap most Farkers in two, I suspect. If we could get them away from their 3D printers long enough to notice a woman.

Nope, I'm too busy 3D printing my magic life extension technology. Then there'll be time to notice girls.


The same magic life extension we've been using for the last 100 years? Or are you claiming we don't live longer than before? You weren't born in a hospital delivered by a doctor trained in germ theory that washes his hands between births and knows about blood types?

No? We have no ways to cure diseases that killed countless thousands before? You know anyone with polio? We eradicated that. We already have life extension.

Print that.
 
2012-12-11 09:43:43 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: Dingleberry Dickwad: Quantum Apostrophe: That's a big healthy girl right there. She could snap most Farkers in two, I suspect. If we could get them away from their 3D printers long enough to notice a woman.

Nope, I'm too busy 3D printing my magic life extension technology. Then there'll be time to notice girls.

The same magic life extension we've been using for the last 100 years? Or are you claiming we don't live longer than before? You weren't born in a hospital delivered by a doctor trained in germ theory that washes his hands between births and knows about blood types?

No? We have no ways to cure diseases that killed countless thousands before? You know anyone with polio? We eradicated that. We already have life extension.

Print that.


Nope, born in a barn. Diseases dropping the human population now and then is a good thing in the long term. Life extension is for chicken shiats and poor thoughtless bastards that don't realize the problems such things cause.

Now shoo. I'm working on 3d printing my real doll. It's going to be a replica of Jessica Simpson in her Dukes of Hazard days.
 
2012-12-12 06:22:26 PM  

Dingleberry Dickwad: Nope, born in a barn. Diseases dropping the human population now and then is a good thing in the long term. Life extension is for chicken shiats and poor thoughtless bastards that don't realize the problems such things cause.


Ah, a self-hating misanthrope. I see. But continuing the species forever on dead space rocks is OK, right?
 
2012-12-12 06:46:01 PM  

Quantum Apostrophe: Dingleberry Dickwad: Nope, born in a barn. Diseases dropping the human population now and then is a good thing in the long term. Life extension is for chicken shiats and poor thoughtless bastards that don't realize the problems such things cause.

Ah, a self-hating misanthrope. I see. But continuing the species forever on dead space rocks is OK, right?


You can continue forever on dead space rocks all you want. Me, I'll just 3D print myself a full sized planet just teeming with life. And it'll all live forever because of magic immortality tech that I'll also 3D print.
 
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