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(Newser)   Poor little Wall Street: The New York Post is reporting that the 2012 bonus season is likely to be a lean one-at least by the Street's standards   (newser.com) divider line 61
    More: Interesting, New York, standards, Wall Street  
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5564 clicks; posted to Business » on 09 Dec 2012 at 5:05 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-09 04:25:42 PM
Perhaps they spent that money on Romney contributions.
 
2012-12-09 04:53:14 PM
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-12-09 05:11:06 PM
It's almost as if all the trading firms and investment banks are very risk averse these days, not willing to take big chances for huge financial gains.

I WONDER WHAT EVER COULD HAVE CAUSED THAT???
 
2012-12-09 05:15:57 PM
strike up the violins
 
2012-12-09 05:18:22 PM

snuffy: strike up the violins


www.rollonfriday.com
 
2012-12-09 05:29:15 PM
The Twinkie boys made out ok.
 
2012-12-09 05:32:16 PM

basemetal: [1.bp.blogspot.com image 850x564]


I see this is covered.
 
2012-12-09 05:47:11 PM
A tear of sympathy* is rolling down my leg.

/dittybopper can tell you where to find "sympathy."
//*Hint: It's between "shiat" and "syphilis".
 
2012-12-09 05:53:15 PM

Bondith: basemetal: [1.bp.blogspot.com image 850x564]

I see this is covered.


I'm disappointed it hasn't appeared in every post, actually...
 
2012-12-09 06:18:39 PM
Ah, so that's why Citigroup had to fire 11,000 employees.
 
2012-12-09 06:19:37 PM
Let's see, how should I respond to this horrifying news?

1. If the bonuses aren't enough to keep the "top talent", maybe they'll all leave Wall Street and go somewhere else, like... China? England? Germany?

2. Maybe they should form a union?

3. And not a single fark was given that day.

Yeah, I'm going with #3.
 
2012-12-09 06:24:08 PM
4. Bonus? You're lucky you have a job.
 
2012-12-09 06:34:42 PM
What the hell is a Bonus?
 
2012-12-09 06:55:12 PM
I work for the IT department of the institutional investment arm of a big bank. It's a good year for bonuses.
 
2012-12-09 07:40:56 PM
i have your bonus right here...
 
2012-12-09 08:11:39 PM

Mitch Taylor's Bro: Let's see, how should I respond to this horrifying news?

1. If the bonuses aren't enough to keep the "top talent", maybe they'll all leave Wall Street and go somewhere else, like... China? England? Germany?


Switzerland, for less regulations. Or to Singapore/Hong Kong, where wealth management is seen as the next big thing (not working out too great so far though)

There is a usual shuffle in Q1 of every year, as banks poach each other's employees. since 2009, a lot of people in the business have exited altogether. several of my former colleagues left to join startups, for example.

from what I hear, JPM is losing lots of staff, and is begging current employees not to leave. that's going to be hard to do, as the bonus pool is smaller than last year.
 
2012-12-09 08:17:00 PM
pity the poor trader!
 
2012-12-09 08:20:59 PM
Welp, looks like beans and weenies three nights a week!
 
2012-12-09 08:29:44 PM

ajgeek: What the hell is a Bonus?


It's this thing that comes in a box and allows you to sample a wide array of hot cocoa mixes.
 
2012-12-09 08:47:27 PM
How will they survive being a rich white asshole, in America?!?!
 
2012-12-09 08:51:25 PM
You can't even get a decent Porsche for that kind of bonus. What do they expect those poor employees to buy, a Lexus?
 
2012-12-09 08:56:49 PM
The rent takers get a little less? Too bad.
 
2012-12-09 09:10:58 PM

dumbobruni: Mitch Taylor's Bro: Let's see, how should I respond to this horrifying news?

1. If the bonuses aren't enough to keep the "top talent", maybe they'll all leave Wall Street and go somewhere else, like... China? England? Germany?


Switzerland, for less regulations. Or to Singapore/Hong Kong, where wealth management is seen as the next big thing (not working out too great so far though)

There is a usual shuffle in Q1 of every year, as banks poach each other's employees. since 2009, a lot of people in the business have exited altogether. several of my former colleagues left to join startups, for example.

from what I hear, JPM is losing lots of staff, and is begging current employees not to leave. that's going to be hard to do, as the bonus pool is smaller than last year.


Still staying with #3. But if I ever do manage to give a fark, I might add a [wellbye.jpg].
 
2012-12-09 09:18:51 PM
I still bet the bonuses are more than what I make *IN A YEAR*.

/Yay, being a grad student in the sciences.
 
2012-12-09 09:30:14 PM

Felgraf: I still bet the bonuses are more than what I make *IN A YEAR*.

/Yay, being a grad student in the sciences.


Could be worse. You could be a grad student in the humanities.

/What exactly do they do all day? Surely it doesn't take 4 years to write a 400-page essay.
//I guess the rest of the time is spent in shiatty jobs paying rent, since the pittance of a stipend they get won't cover anything
 
2012-12-09 09:54:31 PM
 
2012-12-09 10:16:53 PM
Excuse me, but those guys do nothing for the economy except destroy it. They do not create jobs, they create profits on make believe transactions and do not invest in America, because their profits determined by the transaction and not leaving the freaking money in the companies.

Stop paying them bonus' and they will leave. After they leave, get other people to do the job who do not require a bonus. I'm sure any moron can destroy the economy just as well as all the Ivy League MBA's. I'm also just as sure that the same accountants can rig the books so that those morons would make just as many fake profits as the MBAs.
 
2012-12-09 10:32:32 PM
The cake is a lie
 
2012-12-09 10:51:45 PM

ajgeek: What the hell is a Bonus?


Wall Street playing the tax loophole game to hide their money. No loopholes, no need to hide stuff. How do you achieve that? The Fair Tax.
 
2012-12-09 10:56:56 PM

dumbobruni: Switzerland, for less regulations.


You know who else took advantage of Swiss banks lack of regulations?
 
2012-12-09 10:59:40 PM

Smeggy Smurf: ajgeek: What the hell is a Bonus?

Wall Street playing the tax loophole game to hide their money. No loopholes, no need to hide stuff. How do you achieve that? The Fair Tax.


Eliminating the loopholes in our progressive tax structure does sound fair.
 
2012-12-09 11:07:09 PM

sendtodave: Smeggy Smurf: ajgeek: What the hell is a Bonus?

Wall Street playing the tax loophole game to hide their money. No loopholes, no need to hide stuff. How do you achieve that? The Fair Tax.

Eliminating the loopholes in our progressive tax structure does sound fair.


Making everybody pay the same rate for non-essentials is fair. You pay only as much as you want to pay. Sounds fair to me.

/wouldn't pay a goddamned cent
 
2012-12-09 11:16:27 PM

Smeggy Smurf: sendtodave: Smeggy Smurf: ajgeek: What the hell is a Bonus?

Wall Street playing the tax loophole game to hide their money. No loopholes, no need to hide stuff. How do you achieve that? The Fair Tax.

Eliminating the loopholes in our progressive tax structure does sound fair.

Making everybody pay the same rate for non-essentials is fair. You pay only as much as you want to pay. Sounds fair to me.

/wouldn't pay a goddamned cent


Jeffersonian, even.
 
2012-12-09 11:20:02 PM
So basically when the money supply is being counterfeited and they say doubled it, prices doubled on a dollar that was worth half as much.

So your saying that after the dollar value in the sales department has doubled the bonuses for doing nothing are drying up?

Well it was a nice four decades!

BWA-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

*takes breath*

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! 


The rest of you will need a link to buy your own hot cocoa sampler.
 
2012-12-09 11:33:05 PM

wooden_badger: 4. Bonus? You're lucky you have a job.


Maybe more people would have/keep jobs if they relied on a little more than luck?
 
2012-12-10 12:37:08 AM
Instead of 100 times more than anyone could spend in a lifetime, blood-sucking parasites who ought to be dragged off to the guillotine will only get 50 times more than anyone could spend in a lifetime.
 
2012-12-10 02:22:19 AM
In honor of their loss I am going to kill 5000 kittens tonight
 
2012-12-10 05:06:20 AM
Cue Clark Griswold?
 
2012-12-10 06:23:01 AM
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2012-12-10 07:27:34 AM
I know it's cool to hate on the Financial Services Industry or Wall Street or whatever; but I'd really like some more information about how they get these numbers. When they say the average bonus on Wall Street is, '101k' I'd like to see some data to support that.
 
2012-12-10 08:23:54 AM

Fark_Guy_Rob: I'd really like some more information about how they get these numbers.


It's not very exciting.  Basically, the companies will have a total amount that they will publish that they allocate for bonuses.  Add that up, divide by the number of people working, and that's what you get.  
 
2012-12-10 08:36:24 AM
Hey, it's rough being rich in America. Every time you turn around there's some new politician you have to buy off or some third world shiat hole you've been hiding your money in is changing hands and you have to shift it somewhere else to dodge your taxes and then on top of all that a bunch of assholes have the gall to say you should maybe consider lopping a foot or two off your luxury superyacht order so some stupid grandma you don't even know can get her medicine at a discount from a pharma YOU invested in!

Have a little respect for the plight of the wealthy American, would you?
 
2012-12-10 09:01:50 AM
The finance scamster priesthood needs to be drug into the streets, beaten to death and their bodies burned in dumpsters.

Bring back the outlawing of usury. Money is a means of exchange, not a product. All financial problems flow from forgetting this.
 
2012-12-10 09:25:19 AM

Insatiable Jesus: The finance scamster priesthood needs to be drug into the streets, beaten to death and their bodies burned in dumpsters.

Bring back the outlawing of usury. Money is a means of exchange, not a product. All financial problems flow from forgetting this.


I take it you have no car loans, mortgage, or credit cards?
 
2012-12-10 09:30:41 AM
H31N0US: Insatiable Jesus: The finance scamster priesthood needs to be drug into the streets, beaten to death and their bodies burned in dumpsters.

Bring back the outlawing of usury. Money is a means of exchange, not a product. All financial problems flow from forgetting this.

I take it you have no car loans, mortgage, or credit cards?



Are you stupid?
 
2012-12-10 09:31:06 AM

Smeggy Smurf: Making everybody pay the same rate for non-essentials is fair


What's on the essentials list?
 
2012-12-10 09:40:39 AM
I have no pitty for people who willingingly sign up for the system, but I understand their frustration when the bonuses are not "extra", they are in fact your yearly salary in one lump sum
 
2012-12-10 09:52:42 AM

jayhawk88: It's almost as if all the trading firms and investment banks are very risk averse these days, not willing to take big chances for huge financial gains.

I WONDER WHAT EVER COULD HAVE CAUSED THAT???


DAMMIT, FARTBONGO!
 
2012-12-10 09:54:01 AM

rosebud_the_sled: Excuse me, but those guys do nothing for the economy except destroy it. They do not create jobs, they create profits on make believe transactions and do not invest in America....


These guys actually create lots of jobs in the service sector; they buy fancy cars (employing car salesmen and mechanics), they have fancy homes requiring lots of maintenance (groundskeepers, pool service, HVAC, security), and like to build additions onto those homes (employing architects, construction tradespeople, etc.). Would society be better or worse off without them? Probably better, but if you think you can magically remove them with no impact to society, talk to my architect friend living in post-collapse Ireland.
 
2012-12-10 09:58:45 AM

WordsnCollision: snuffy: strike up the violins

[www.rollonfriday.com image 266x400]


Jeez. A generic tiny violin? Not even the good, gold-plated one? This economy really *is* terrible.
 
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