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(AP)   $50 for a crappy cup of coffee   (hosted.ap.org) divider line 65
    More: Interesting, cup of coffee, gastric acid, Asian elephant, total sales, Golden Triangle, luxury resort  
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7536 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Dec 2012 at 4:02 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-07 04:05:21 PM
thisiswhyitsucks.com

"It's a bit nutty"
 
2012-12-07 04:05:26 PM
You can put lipstick on the elephant's ass to verify if contact is being made.
 
2012-12-07 04:06:44 PM
Anyone who pays a ridiculous premium for anything out of an animals ass needs to be smacked in the face.
 
2012-12-07 04:07:12 PM
This is news?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kopi_Lu wak
 
2012-12-07 04:07:31 PM
hosted.ap.org

Yeah, that's right. Sift through my shiat. Yeah, you love it.
 
2012-12-07 04:07:49 PM
Elephants have a fairly high BMR and excrete rather low-entropy poop.
 
2012-12-07 04:09:01 PM
Jeebus, has Starbucks raised their prices again?
 
2012-12-07 04:09:17 PM
FTA: ,,,the cuppa, which is called Black Ivory Coffee.


Let that sink in awhile...


/contrived?
 
2012-12-07 04:09:31 PM
I'd drink it, but then, I've been known to do a lot of stupid things.
 
2012-12-07 04:11:24 PM
I'd drink it. Pay for it, no, but drink, yes.

Kopi luwak is pretty tasty. Didn't pay for it either the couple times I had some.
 
2012-12-07 04:12:06 PM
I think I'll stick with the cat crap coffee.

/bought it, haven't tried it yet
 
2012-12-07 04:13:53 PM
Agreed, Kopi Luwak is damn good, but not better enough than regular coffee to ever be worth paying for.
 
2012-12-07 04:14:02 PM

eltejon: /contrived?


No doubt. TFA interviewed the guy who spent $300k "developing" the product. Some of that certainly went for branding / marketing!
 
2012-12-07 04:17:25 PM
www.marvunapp.com
media.comicvine.com
 
2012-12-07 04:19:33 PM
Fun Fact: The "best" durian is said to have passed through an elephant's digestive system this way.
 
2012-12-07 04:20:43 PM
More proof that people will buy anything if you put it in nice wrapping and stick a high enough price tag on it.
 
2012-12-07 04:22:27 PM
You can eat Chit, or you can drink chit......up to you.
 
2012-12-07 04:26:25 PM
It's like the goose that shiats the golden turd.
 
2012-12-07 04:27:07 PM
the only thing better than being the first to drink poo coffee is getting others to pay princely sums to do the same.
 
2012-12-07 04:27:33 PM
If you're going to pay 50$ for coffee, I've heard that Black Blood of the Earth was worth it. According to the creator, it ~tastes~ like coffee ~smells~.

Apparently tastes sweet, but has ~40x the caffeine of coffee, and you drink it by the shot, unless you like being very nervous and jittery.
 
2012-12-07 04:28:52 PM
I wonder if anyone's ever thought of stewing a bunch of raw coffee beans with the equivalent of whatever might affect its flavor in the animal's digestive tract. It should be possible to get similar results without so much expense, labor, or risk of disease from sifting through animal crap.
 
2012-12-07 04:29:47 PM
Nope. Nothing that exists first as an animal's dung. Never, no matter how many people clamor for it.
 
2012-12-07 04:32:52 PM
If you are going to drink shiatty coffee, may I suggest this?

abe-research.illinois.edu
 
2012-12-07 04:36:55 PM
So 2 girls 1 cup is coming out on DVD then?
 
2012-12-07 04:36:57 PM
What's the facination with coffee made from crap? I've heard of civet cat, weasel, and now elephant...

Do we really have that many people who want to consume feces?
 
2012-12-07 04:36:59 PM
Dang hipsters.

I need to open a coffee shop just to make a fortune feeding animals raw beans and selling the crapped out ones.
 
2012-12-07 04:37:52 PM

quietwalker: If you're going to pay 50$ for coffee, I've heard that Black Blood of the Earth was worth it. According to the creator, it ~tastes~ like coffee ~smells~.

Apparently tastes sweet, but has ~40x the caffeine of coffee, and you drink it by the shot, unless you like being very nervous and jittery.


Any drink named after a spell cast by a WOW boss just seems unlikely to be good, though probably better than coffee that's passed through an elephant's intestines.
 
2012-12-07 04:38:17 PM
i471.photobucket.com

R.I.P. CRAPPIE
 
2012-12-07 04:38:48 PM

cyberspacedout: I wonder if anyone's ever thought of stewing a bunch of raw coffee beans with the equivalent of whatever might affect its flavor in the animal's digestive tract. It should be possible to get similar results without so much expense, labor, or risk of disease from sifting through animal crap.


I don't think it's about that.

It's about being rich enough to say "Oh you drink Starbucks? MY coffee is harvested by 100s of poor women, who then feed it to elephants. Then, MORE poor people sift through the elephants CRAP just to get me this coffee."
 
2012-12-07 04:43:05 PM
You could probably develop a chemical process to do about the same thing for a fraction of the cost and no shiat sifting.
 
2012-12-07 04:43:54 PM
Sorry, but I like my women the way I like my coffee: Covered in civet shiat.
 
2012-12-07 04:52:39 PM
it's for people with lots of money that don't want to buy cocaine. "hey look i'm spending a lot of money on stimulants. but i'm DRUG FREE!"
 
2012-12-07 04:56:52 PM

Sarsin: cyberspacedout: I wonder if anyone's ever thought of stewing a bunch of raw coffee beans with the equivalent of whatever might affect its flavor in the animal's digestive tract. It should be possible to get similar results without so much expense, labor, or risk of disease from sifting through animal crap.

I don't think it's about that.

It's about being rich enough to say "Oh you drink Starbucks? MY coffee is harvested by 100s of poor women, who then feed it to elephants. Then, MORE poor people sift through the elephants CRAP just to get me this coffee."


I got the impression from the article that they get a fair share of the earnings. Maybe that's just me.
 
2012-12-07 04:57:14 PM
goteaminternet.com

Up next, it's called a "cupakeeno"... and wait till you hear what it costs!
 
2012-12-07 04:57:39 PM

SirTanon: [thisiswhyitsucks.com image 506x217]

"It's a bit nutty"


Over in 1 
gifs.gifbin.com
 
2012-12-07 05:15:24 PM
Poop coffee really is yummy. The acid from the gut removes all the bitterness. I wouldn't pay $50 a cup though.
 
2012-12-07 05:15:36 PM
Once you drink it you will never forget it.
 
2012-12-07 05:20:56 PM
Skipped to the end, without even clicking on the article or reading the comments, to say: Yes, we've all heard of Kopi Luwak by now.

Is that what this was about? Did I "guess" right?
 
2012-12-07 05:30:35 PM

bim1154: If you are going to drink shiatty coffee, may I suggest this?
[abe-research.illinois.edu image 278x305]


Hey hey hey. That's my regular brand.

Civets, the little critters that make poop coffee, are being abused by being held in tiny cages by the hundreds and farmed for their coffee poop. But don't worry about it--as long as your farking coffee isn't bitter.
 
2012-12-07 05:30:41 PM

The Southern Dandy: Poop coffee really is yummy. The acid from the gut removes all the bitterness. I wouldn't pay $50 a cup though.


Crushed clean eggshells in your filter will do the same thing.
 
2012-12-07 05:33:35 PM
I bet it would taste the same coming out of a persons ass.

Hey! That's a great business idea. You can charge different depending on the nationality and the age of the ass it came out of.
 
2012-12-07 05:35:03 PM
I enjoy the bitterness in coffee.

Its the acidity of bad coffees that I don't like.
 
2012-12-07 05:37:06 PM

mc_hfcs: Skipped to the end, without even clicking on the article or reading the comments, to say: Yes, we've all heard of Kopi Luwak by now.

Is that what this was about? Did I "guess" right?


Close - Dumbo dung this time around...
 
2012-12-07 05:43:22 PM
so what happens if a poop turd slips out along with the coffee beans which i assume they're swallowing whole and not crunching up?

such a process makes me want to squirm
 
2012-12-07 05:45:01 PM

Dadoody: I enjoy the bitterness in coffee.


COMMIE!
 
2012-12-07 05:50:46 PM
i mean seriously there literally HAS to be a way to simulate this with CHEMICALS as opposed to NATURAL ORGANIC PROCESS of ASS POOPING
 
2012-12-07 06:42:16 PM

Jument: Anyone who pays a ridiculous premium for anything out of an animals ass needs to be smacked in the face.


upload.wikimedia.org
 
2012-12-07 07:09:07 PM

Jon iz teh kewl: i mean seriously there literally HAS to be a way to simulate this with CHEMICALS as opposed to NATURAL ORGANIC PROCESS of ASS POOPING


Or a 3D printer. It's the future bonanza.
 
2012-12-07 07:11:30 PM

Quantum Apostrophe: Jon iz teh kewl: i mean seriously there literally HAS to be a way to simulate this with CHEMICALS as opposed to NATURAL ORGANIC PROCESS of ASS POOPING

Or a 3D printer. It's the future bonanza.


poop turds look a lot like coffee beans..
 
2012-12-07 07:20:55 PM
I'm currently shopping around my own brand of ass corn chowder. Basically I sit around eating corn all day and mine the kernels from my toilet and make chowder out of it. You'd be surprised how much sweeter and savory the finished product is. I'm hoping to go on Shark Tank and get Mark Cuban to back my endeavor.
 
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