If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Mother Jones)   Texas secessionists have a PAC now, for some reason   (motherjones.com) divider line 56
    More: Stupid, Texas, patriot movement, perennial candidate, Texas Ethics Commission  
•       •       •

2517 clicks; posted to Politics » on 05 Dec 2012 at 2:32 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2012-12-05 02:24:15 PM
9 votes:
Texas secessionists have a PAC now, for some reason

Because they're rubes. A few people will get rich, and these f*cking crybabies will get fleeced.
2012-12-05 03:15:10 PM
5 votes:
"We have heard them threaten to secede so often that I have formed an enthusiastic organization -- The American Friends for Texas Secession. This stops the subject cold. They want to be able to secede, but they don't want anybone to want them to."

--John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley, p 174
2012-12-05 02:47:13 PM
5 votes:
Step 1. Texas secedes from the Union.
Step 2. US invades Texas, takes all their stuff, sells Texas to Mexico.
Step 3. Profit, profit, and PROFIT!

It's mostly desert, with a hostile government, and they have oil. It's been done before.

/I'll sign your petition.
2012-12-05 02:36:10 PM
4 votes:
lol. if texas secedes, the GOP will never win the presidency ever again. i don't think they've thought their cunning plan all the way through...
2012-12-05 02:19:24 PM
4 votes:
Gotta be a weird feeling to love your country so much you wish to secede from it.
2012-12-05 02:20:15 PM
3 votes:

homelessdude: I am strongly considering a donation to this PAC if it can be determined that is not a hoax.

After the past decade (and especially the last few years), I would be very satisfied hearing the phrase The 49 United States of America if this PAC was actually able to accomplish its goal..


I think they'd just bring in Puerto Rico and keep it at an even 50.
2012-12-05 03:54:10 PM
2 votes:

Jim_Callahan: If you're not from Texas, California, or New York, you realize that none of the other states would even miss you enough to realize you were gone until like a week after you left, right? (Well, and FL is a close 4th to NY, but as a Farker I'm obligated to make an implicit "no one cares" joke there). Those four states are 32% of the population and about 1/3 of the US GDP between them.

The US would actually be hurt significantly if Texas left, stop pretending otherwise. Especially if you don't live in one of the big four. Actually, even if you do, because that's still failing basic logic and economics no matter where you live.


If Texas actually left I would think companies would relocate out of that country because they offer no protections to shipping lanes and contract law nor could they give permission to use waters for mining and oil extraction that they have no ability to control.
2012-12-05 03:04:42 PM
2 votes:
FTFA: Membership in the pro-secession Texas Nationalist Movement has increased 400 percent since President Barack Obama won re-election on November 5-or so the TMN claims.

Because going from 4 people to 16 is increasing 400% and sounds better than "12 more people"...

Actual numbers arbitrary, point made.
2012-12-05 02:58:11 PM
2 votes:
4.bp.blogspot.com
2012-12-05 02:50:48 PM
2 votes:

homelessdude: I am strongly considering a donation to this PAC if it can be determined that is not a hoax.


I'm considering forming one next election season. I can put together a political ad. I could pay myself most of the money I raise. Seems like all you need is decent branding...
2012-12-05 02:49:32 PM
2 votes:
As someone who lives in Fort Worth, this will bring me years of unending entertainment. Watching tears of impotent rage roll down the cheeks of those who would rather speak in hyperbole, pursuing an unfeasible and self-defeating goal rather than truly try to correct the pile of issues upon which they heave their extremism and traitorous rhetoric, is quite possibly the best and most deserved schadenfreude.
2012-12-05 02:41:52 PM
2 votes:
TNM-PAC doesn't mention any specific candidates it plans to support, but from the site it's possible to speculate. Perennial candidate Larry Kilgore, who recently changed his middle name to "SECEDE" (yes, allcaps), received 250,000 votes in the 2008 GOP Senate primary and is planning on running for governor in two years.


Larry SECEDE Kilgore? I would've thought Texas would be hard pressed to find someone stupider than Rick "Oops" Perry-- but, apparently, not so much.
2012-12-05 02:40:55 PM
2 votes:
Anyone want to start a PAC for kicking out Texas?
2012-12-05 02:17:43 PM
2 votes:
I am strongly considering a donation to this PAC if it can be determined that is not a hoax.

After the past decade (and especially the last few years), I would be very satisfied hearing the phrase The 49 United States of America if this PAC was actually able to accomplish its goal..
2012-12-06 06:56:14 AM
1 votes:

Duke Phillips' Singing Bears: F*CK! secede. Dammit. dammit dammit dammit.


For them, wouldn't success be defined by seceding? So your successive posts were unnecessary. But I digress.
2012-12-06 06:34:50 AM
1 votes:

hubiestubert: Good luck with that.

Just to be clear: even IF you could vote yourself out, that would mean that Fort Hood, Fort Bliss and the other pieces of US Federal property would either have to be bought, and cleared out. The US taxpayers paid for said property, not just the "sovereign state of Texas" so there would have to be time for a LOT of equipment to be moved, and what couldn't be, would have to be bought and paid for. That, or Texas would have US military bases within its borders, much like other nations have US military bases. There is also the matter of the Coast Guard, Air Force, the Federal buildings and the like. Texas, I suppose, could try to claim them, but that would likely trigger a less than appealing response from the folks who actually paid for the suckers. While Texas is all for taking over the facilities, I wonder how eager they are to take over the Federal prisons. Or take over responsibility for EPA sites...


I suspect the secessionists are assuming they could simply take over control of federal property within their borders, but they won't have a General Twiggs available this time to hand it all over to them. There are far more "northern" troops stationed in Texas these days than there are soldiers (not to mention senior officers) from states that, theoretically, might be sympathetic to secession. It would be a ready-made army of occupation.
2012-12-05 11:26:48 PM
1 votes:
Because PACs are the easiest way to legally embezzle money?
2012-12-05 07:39:24 PM
1 votes:

winterbraid: hubiestubert: Houston petitioning for statehood

hubiestubert: You'll note how few times you hear secessionist rumblings from Arizona or Nevada

hubiestubert: the British and even the French sort of looming

These are relevant to my interests, but apparently hard to google, especially comparative secessionists. Recommended reading?


Sam Houston petitioned Texas statehood very early. Pretty much out of the gate. That's simply a matter of record. Not Houston the city, but Houston the hero of their break from Mexico. Houston likewise even as he was looking to Tyler and President elect Polk for smoothing over of the approval of their statehood status--which was done in record time--also approached both the English and the French for possible admission to protect Texas from further aggression from Mexico. Polk sort of went above and beyond when he took the Presidency, because not only did he secure a Texas border with Mexico, he took New Mexico and California and pretty much nailed the Oregon Territories as well, solidly cementing Manifest Destiny not as a concept, but as a solid fact. If Congress and Tyler had dithered longer, then Houston was going to really have to leap through some hoops to protect his people, since they had sort of peeved off Mexico fairly badly. As it was the resultant war that Polk took a lot of the pressure off Texas, and focused folks on something OTHER than slave states entry and his somewhat controversial independent treasury...

As for Arizona and Nevada, they both rely on Hoover Dam for power. Much of northern Arizona is pretty much entirely dependent upon its power. The Dam is a Federal project, and run as such. Power and water in both Arizona and Nevada are very much wedded to the project, but the power usage from the Dam runs as far as Cali.
2012-12-05 06:09:40 PM
1 votes:

qorkfiend: I think what would be most damaging to Texas would be the sudden, massive influx of cartel influence once US federal law enforcement is gone.


Indeed, no more National Guard, Coast Guard, US Border Patrol, ATF, DEA, etc. I wonder if it's within the realm of possibility that the larger cartels would move take over some of the border towns and set up shop outside of Mexico's jurisdiction.
2012-12-05 06:01:10 PM
1 votes:

mak3_7up_y0urs: As a liberal Texan, I'd like to apologize for this insanity.

I've always wondered what kind of currency secessionists would use since they all seem to believe that the dollar is going down the drain. Then I'd ask what all the large global businesses would do with all of their offices across the state. These folks like to talk about uncertainty, and I'd think that secession would inject quite of bit of it into the business climate in Texas, especially considering that this scrappy new nation would essentially have zero diplomatic ties with other countries, at least initially. Is it possible that the US would institute an embargo against Texas? What effect would that have on Texas businesses?

Also, millions of people here voted to re-elect President Obama. What happens if nearly half the state moves to remain a part of the US? What are senior citizens who rely on medicare and social security going to do once those payments are cut off? What is the Texas military going to do when the US repossesses all of its equipment? Texans would need passports to cross into any of the bordering US states, and I'm sure it would be awesome if major US Interstates were re-routed to go around Texas completely.

Do these people seriously believe that Texas will get to keep all the benefits of the US without being subject to all of the things they disagree with?


I think what would be most damaging to Texas would be the sudden, massive influx of cartel influence once US federal law enforcement is gone.
2012-12-05 05:59:37 PM
1 votes:
As a liberal Texan, I'd like to apologize for this insanity.

I've always wondered what kind of currency secessionists would use since they all seem to believe that the dollar is going down the drain. Then I'd ask what all the large global businesses would do with all of their offices across the state. These folks like to talk about uncertainty, and I'd think that secession would inject quite of bit of it into the business climate in Texas, especially considering that this scrappy new nation would essentially have zero diplomatic ties with other countries, at least initially. Is it possible that the US would institute an embargo against Texas? What effect would that have on Texas businesses?

Also, millions of people here voted to re-elect President Obama. What happens if nearly half the state moves to remain a part of the US? What are senior citizens who rely on medicare and social security going to do once those payments are cut off? What is the Texas military going to do when the US repossesses all of its equipment? Texans would need passports to cross into any of the bordering US states, and I'm sure it would be awesome if major US Interstates were re-routed to go around Texas completely.

Do these people seriously believe that Texas will get to keep all the benefits of the US without being subject to all of the things they disagree with?
2012-12-05 05:36:03 PM
1 votes:
If you aren't with us you're against us, amirite?
2012-12-05 05:26:07 PM
1 votes:
civilwarriors.net
images4.wikia.nocookie.net 

Go for it!

/Please.
2012-12-05 05:13:41 PM
1 votes:
I'll say it again, as I do every time this subject comes up: If the Texas Legislature were to vote to secede from the U.S., the majority of the people of Dallas, Houston, San Antonio, Austin, and El Paso would promptly move to secede from the State of Texas, and also would invite the U.S. armed forces in with open arms. Texas has a population of ~26 million -- and those five cities account for ~5.25 million of that. And probably more than half the wealth, one way or another.

Don't make the assumption that all Texans are alike, or that all of them agree with the desires of a tiny paranoid minority, which happens to exert more its share of power in the legislature. A serious attempt by the radical right wing to take Texas out of the union would kick off a civil war of major proportions WITHIN the state.
2012-12-05 05:11:05 PM
1 votes:
So, uh, theoretically, if someone wanted to start a PAC to promote something incredibly stupid that would widely appeal to incredibly stupid people, what are the regulations? Can you pay yourself some huge salary and spend $10 on putting up flyers you printed out?

/Would LOVE to see Texas secede.
2012-12-05 04:58:54 PM
1 votes:
i53.tinypic.com
2012-12-05 04:24:20 PM
1 votes:
1) Set up Derptard PAC
2) Make yourself a paid "consultant" for said PAC
3) Profit!!!
2012-12-05 04:02:51 PM
1 votes:
**New and Improved (mostly) Linkified™** 

List Of People Conspiring Against The GOP, And Therefore, America (LOPCATGOPATA for short):

Liberals Link
Democrats Link
Socialists Link
Community Organizers Link
Geologists Link
Biologists Link
Meteorologists Link
Climatologists Link
Atheists Link
Muslims Link
Jews
Satan
ABC
NBC
CNN
CBS
PBS
All of cable news except FNC
The New York Times
The LA Times
The Washington Post
The Associated Press
Reuters
BBC
The Guardian
Black People
Mexicans
Human Rights Activists
SCOTUS
Europe
Movie Industry
Television Industry
Environmentalists
ACLU
The United Nations
Labor Unions Link
Colleges
Teachers (including kindergarten teachers) Link
Professors
Astrophysicists Link
ACORN Link
Planned Parenthood Link
National Endowment for the Arts Link
Fashion Industry Link
Gays
Judges Link
NPR Link
Paleontologists
Astrophysicists
Museums (*except Creationism Museum)
WHO
WTO
Inflated tires Link
The Honolulu Advertiser Link
The Star Bulletin Link
Teletubbies Link
Sponge Bob and Patrick Link
Nobel Prize Committee Link
US Census Bureau Link
Standard & Poor's Link
SimCity Link
NOAA
Sesame Street Link
Comic Books Link
Dogs Link
Little Green Footballs Link
Video Games Link
The Bible Link
CBO Link
Bruce Springsteen Link
Pennies
Warren Buffet Link
The Theory of Relativity Link
Comedy Central Link
Young People
whatever the hell a Justin Beiber is Link
Small Business Owners Link
Math Link
CPAC updated Link
Navy SEALs Link
The Economist
The Muppets Link
Iowa Republicans
Low-Flow Toilets Link
Rainbows Link
United States Secret Service Link
Breast Cancer Screenings Link
Chrysler Link
Clint Eastwood. Link
Robert Deniro Link
Tom Hanks Link
Glenn Frey Link
Bono Link
Bono Impersonators Link
Former Republican Senator Alan Simpson Link
Norman Rockwell Link
James Cameron Link
Dr. Seus
The Brookings Institution link
Tax Policy Center link
Nuns Link
Supreme Court Justice John Roberts Link
Jonathan Krohn at age 17 Link
Fact Checkers Link
Pollsters Link
Australia Link
Mitt Romney
Rasmussen
Fox News
Lockheed Martin Link
Bureau of Labor Statistics Link
Paul Ryan Link
Debate moderators Link
Google Link
Ben Stein Link
Soup kitchens updated Link
Chris Christie Link
Nate Silver (FiveThirtyEight.com) Link
Fox Polling Link
US Postal Service
Associated Press
Hurricanes Link
Susan Collins Link
Lisa Murkowski Link
Dean Heller Link
Mark Kirk Link
Lindsey Graham Link
Governor Bobby Jindal Link
General Petreaus Link
Saxby Chambliss Link
God Link
Girl Scouts Link
Boston Tea Party Link
Vegetables Link
American Indians Link
John Boehner Link
United States of America Link


More groups will be added as they and their nefarious schemes are exposed.

thanks to the many for finding the links
2012-12-05 03:49:29 PM
1 votes:

mrlewish: Anyone want to start a PAC for kicking out Texas?



Why would we want to do that? Wait 10 years and they'll be a swing state - if not blue.

These "secessionist" idiots just want to secede before that happens so they can suppress the minority voters - and keep the state in the hands of white christians - without the feds stopping them.
2012-12-05 03:24:38 PM
1 votes:
If I may speak from the rest of the US, Texas, please leave. Take a few of your neighbors with you. No really, leave. All the good Texans of yesteryear are just that.
2012-12-05 03:24:08 PM
1 votes:

homelessdude: I am strongly considering a donation to this PAC if it can be determined that is not a hoax.

After the past decade (and especially the last few years), I would be very satisfied hearing the phrase The 49 United States of America if this PAC was actually able to accomplish its goal..


Nonsense. We won't have to change the flag or slogans at all as we can pick up Puerto Rico as a quick replacement.
2012-12-05 03:23:34 PM
1 votes:
So do serious social commentators like Stephen Colbert and comedians like Sarah Palin.
2012-12-05 03:22:28 PM
1 votes:

Headso: ongbok: I'm pretty sure that any future employer or potential future associate that Googles their name and finds this, unless they are a mouth breathing paranoid racist also, is not going to want to be associated with somebody that is not only delusional, but is also dumb enough to associate themselves with crap like this.


In Texas you might be more apt to get a callback if you let your derp flag fly.


In much the same way an enormous amount of gang ink can improve your quality of life (in the prison that is).
2012-12-05 03:18:14 PM
1 votes:

maddogdelta: "We have heard them threaten to secede so often that I have formed an enthusiastic organization -- The American Friends for Texas Secession. This stops the subject cold. They want to be able to secede, but they don't want anybone to want them to."

--John Steinbeck, Travels With Charley, p 174


Imagine, as a teenage runaway, discovering that your parents really were happy with you gone
2012-12-05 03:16:28 PM
1 votes:

ongbok: Do these people realize what kind of damage they are doing to their future by associating their names with crap like this, that is never going to happen and they know it, just to stick it Obama and Liberals?


You don't understand. Sticking It To The Liberals is the most important thing of all - indeed, it is literally THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS. All else pales in comparison.
2012-12-05 03:13:31 PM
1 votes:
Among his other issues: instituting the death penalty as a punishment for adultery

You don't need to secede. Just farking move to the Middle East. I'm sure you'd feel right at home.
2012-12-05 03:10:20 PM
1 votes:

theknuckler_33: Lionel Mandrake: Texas secessionists have a PAC now, for some reason

Because they're rubes. A few people will get rich, and these f*cking crybabies will get fleeced.

Yup. I came in here to write "for $ome rea$on?"


This. A few PAC owners will get rich off of this.
2012-12-05 03:07:22 PM
1 votes:

timujin: Please just let them go. Then maybe all the other ignorant crackerasscrackers in the rest of the country would move there so they could be "free".


Okay, but then you'd have a state filled with Authoritarian types who have become accustomed to getting echo-chamber propaganda news from a single source. They'd have a chunk of our military men, and financing from megacorps who'd suck them dry as they've been all this time.

So, even assuming that the war didn't start when they left -- once things started to go bad, how long before they'd be whipped into invading the rest of the country? Ya'know, because the Liberal States of America was going to invade them, inevitably, and force them to have abortions, give up their guns, and turn muslim? And the best distraction for domestic problems is a foreign war, after all.
2012-12-05 02:57:33 PM
1 votes:
Sometimes I think that if Lincoln had just let the Confederates go, we'd all be happier today.
2012-12-05 02:56:39 PM
1 votes:
Wait, if Texas succeeds, they will be then trapped between the USA which they hate and mexico who they also hate....
1. who is going to protect their borders.
2. who would protect them from mexico reclaiming their land?
2012-12-05 02:53:15 PM
1 votes:

Dusk-You-n-Me: Gotta be a weird feeling to love your country so much you wish to secede from it.


Wingnuts have no capacity for love. They only know fear, and its most visible byproduct, hate. When a Wingnut says it "loves" something, it is really saying it fears that thing slightly less than everything else.
2012-12-05 02:47:44 PM
1 votes:
Bring on the new People's Democratic Republic of Upper Mexico!
2012-12-05 02:47:17 PM
1 votes:

JolobinSmokin: Do you think they accept my soveriegn nation check?

I'll even write it for one brazillion dollars.



I'm going to send them a sight draft for the entire value of my U.S. Treasury strawman account.
2012-12-05 02:46:48 PM
1 votes:
Reasons we should keep Texas: Large manufacturing and infrastructure investment, Houston space center, lots of military bases that would need shuttering, Austin, tacos.

Reasons to get rid of Texas: it's farking Texas.

Sorry Texans, this one is really a toss up for the rest of us.
2012-12-05 02:45:47 PM
1 votes:
This makes it soooo much easier to identify the anti-American traitors in our midst.
2012-12-05 02:42:55 PM
1 votes:

DeltaPunch: Again, it's just too easy to fleece money from these rubes.

WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THIS FIRST?!?


i970.photobucket.com
2012-12-05 02:42:40 PM
1 votes:
Sell the place to Mexico.
2012-12-05 02:41:40 PM
1 votes:
All of the idiots who want to secede need to realize that the borders are open and that they can leave any time they want. Then the rest of us can go on, happy in their absence.
2012-12-05 02:41:29 PM
1 votes:
Secs-PAC?
2012-12-05 02:41:05 PM
1 votes:

NowhereMon: Where do I send my check?


Don't write a check. Just go the bank and get a bunch $100 bills and then burn them. It will keep your hands warm for a minute or two, which is more than you'll get if you give these guys a check.
2012-12-05 02:39:19 PM
1 votes:
Again, it's just too easy to fleece money from these rubes.

WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THIS FIRST?!?
2012-12-05 02:38:07 PM
1 votes:
Grant them their wishes: take away their citizenship.
2012-12-05 02:37:25 PM
1 votes:
Do you think they accept my soveriegn nation check?

I'll even write it for one brazillion dollars.
2012-12-05 02:36:00 PM
1 votes:
That reason is probably money laundering for the cartels.
2012-12-05 02:35:19 PM
1 votes:
DO IT

DO IT

DO IT

DO IT
2012-12-05 02:13:06 PM
1 votes:
The Texas Nationalist Movement's foray into the world of campaign finance is its biggest step yet in an effort to enter-and eventually become-the political mainstream. It's also peaceful, which is a noted break from another modern-day Texas secession movement, the Republic of Texas, which was helmed by an eccentric named Richard McLaren who launched an armed invasion and occupation of his neighbor's house in Far West Texas in the 1990s.

TNM-PAC doesn't mention any specific candidates it plans to support, but from the site it's possible to speculate. Perennial candidate Larry Kilgore, who recently changed his middle name to "SECEDE" (yes, allcaps), received 250,000 votes in the 2008 GOP Senate primary and is planning on running for governor in two years. (Among his other issues: instituting the death penalty as a punishment for adultery) The group also touts on its site a November lecture on secession by Wes Riddle, a blogger and historic theater owner who lost a 2010 U.S. House primary despite picking up an endorsement from retiring Rep. Ron Paul.


Wow. Where to start? I'm fairly tickled by the armed invasion of a neighbor's house.
 
Displayed 56 of 56 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report