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(Yahoo)   Iran says it has extracted every last bit of data from non-existent U.S. intelligence drone that was not captured   (news.yahoo.com) divider line 33
    More: Followup, U.S. News, United States, Iran, Eisenhower Administration, oil terminal, Press TV, oil platforms, Israeli government  
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7195 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Dec 2012 at 4:11 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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Archived thread
2012-12-05 02:17:48 PM
15 votes:
PRESIDENT AHMADINEJAD: Yes, Great Ayatollah, our skilled technicians have broken the encryption on the data retrieved from the Great Satan's drone!

AYATOLLAH KHAMENEI: Most excellent.

IRANIAN TECHNICIAN: Mister President, the data appears to be encoded as video. I believe we have the proper codecs installed to play this now, if you wish.

PRESIDENT AHMADINEJAD: Proceed.

(All eyes turn to the video projection screen)

AYATOLLAH KHAMENEI: "Never gonna give you up? Never gonna let you down?" Is this some kind of code?

PRESIDENT AHMADINEJAD: (facepalm)
2012-12-05 04:37:19 PM
5 votes:
great. so now they know what their own country looks like.
2012-12-05 04:20:53 PM
5 votes:
Those crafty Bastids.

media2.hickorees.com
2012-12-05 05:43:48 PM
4 votes:
Not my idea but I haven't seen some one photoshop it so I did.

img850.imageshack.us
2012-12-05 04:35:20 PM
4 votes:
Seriously, Iran got the technological boost equivalent to beating up that guy at the mall who flies the little helicopters around all day.

Iranian Engineer:
s3.amazonaws.com
2012-12-05 01:58:04 PM
4 votes:

Cythraul: And even if they had one of our drones. Then what? Are they going to start building them? Did the drone have all our military tactics information embedded in it?


Even worse...Obama's long-form birth certificate AND college transcripts were on that flight.
2012-12-05 01:31:34 PM
4 votes:
encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com
2012-12-05 04:40:19 PM
3 votes:
Sunday: Susan Rice appears on news shows to reaffirm that this was NOT our drone.
Monday: FOX news exclusive that this was an American designed drone, but possibly used by another country.
Tuesday: FOX news reveals that Susan Rice has not had the basic training to remotely control these drones.
Wednesday: Hannity asks the question as to whether Susan Rice, not being a remote control flying expert, can even claim that it was not a U.S. drone. Demands investigation.
Thursday: The Blaze features an inside source showing that not only did Susan Rice purposely give the Iranians classified information via the black box carried on the drone, but that she is part of a plot to make the U.S.A. legally bound to Sharia Law.
Friday: Rush Limbaugh calls out for Susan Rice to be charged as a traitor and deported.
Saturday: 35% of GOP voters 100% confident that Susan Rice is a secret muslim infiltrator involved in an internal power grab with Valerie Jarret to control Obama.
Sunday: News shows have moved on to discuss fiscal cliff negotiations amid lamentations from conservative media that the Iranian drone story is being swept under the rug by the liberal media.
2012-12-05 01:56:17 PM
3 votes:
Okay, which one of you jokers installed Stuxnet 2.0 on the intelligence drone?
2012-12-05 04:51:50 PM
2 votes:
The drone is a model used by several Gulf States......


SO literally it may have been borrowed from a neighbor.

Do they know they can order MRE's from ebay, then they can claim to have captured our top secret super food technology.
2012-12-05 04:34:42 PM
2 votes:
I urge all Americans to join me in tying yellow ribbons around trees until Iran frees our drone.
2012-12-05 03:47:00 PM
2 votes:

toraque: PRESIDENT AHMADINEJAD: (facepalm)


Just the audio. For the picture:

img716.imageshack.us
2012-12-05 01:50:20 PM
2 votes:

vernonFL: [encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com image 264x191]



Many bits died for this information.
2012-12-05 01:35:57 PM
2 votes:
What didn't Obama know, and when didn't he know it?
2012-12-05 07:46:13 PM
1 votes:
Damn it I had all my porn on that drone. I want it back, you bastards!
2012-12-05 07:30:20 PM
1 votes:
"We have fully extracted the drone's information," Iran's Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps (IRGC) said in a statement on Wednesday

i236.photobucket.com
2012-12-05 07:24:01 PM
1 votes:

toraque: PRESIDENT AHMADINEJAD: Yes, Great Ayatollah, our skilled technicians have broken the encryption on the data retrieved from the Great Satan's drone!

AYATOLLAH KHAMENEI: Most excellent.

IRANIAN TECHNICIAN: Mister President, the data appears to be encoded as video. I believe we have the proper codecs installed to play this now, if you wish.

PRESIDENT AHMADINEJAD: Proceed.

(All eyes turn to the video projection screen)

AYATOLLAH KHAMENEI: "Never gonna give you up? Never gonna let you down?" Is this some kind of code?

PRESIDENT AHMADINEJAD: (facepalm)


If it wouldn't get you kidnapped by Iranian spies and smuggled back to Iran, I'd totally put down some green to get a drone like this, a ticket to the area, and would fly it across the border (adding autopilot functionality so it could fly straight and then circle over a city), so it could be shot down and have the contents analyzed to find this video. You'd have to armor the shiat out of the data storage, though.
2012-12-05 06:20:43 PM
1 votes:

indarwinsshadow: kim jong-un: indarwinsshadow: What data? Everything is probably downlinked. The only thing they could gather from this souped up low cost hobby aircraft is some navigation software. It doesn't carry weapons. It probably doesn't store the data, and if it does it's probably non encrypted basic point and shoot video. A big "meh". I could be wrong but I doubt it.

The FCS and nav software is what separates a high end military drone from a model aircraft.

Weapons are simple. Delivery is the challenge.

But there's nothing to either FCS or nab that can't be had "off the shelf". As someone has stated, it's not autonomous but guided by human pilot. So...there's nothing to be gathered that can't be had on an open market. Or a hobby group. Again. Meh.

Iran, first in photoshop.


img191.imageshack.us

Props to whoever made this one.
2012-12-05 06:19:13 PM
1 votes:

Prof. Ann Marion: Wade_Wilson: Forgive me if there's a ready answer to this, but why not have a self destruct device on these things?

Doesn't need to be an actual "boom" or anything, ...

No. I was expecting a "ka-boom", an Earth shattering "ka-boom".


You forgot to turn on the Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator
2012-12-05 06:00:04 PM
1 votes:
So they have aerial footage of a third world country? Congrats!
2012-12-05 05:46:58 PM
1 votes:

BigNumber12: Tickle Mittens: It could just be a hilarious way for us to deliver a trojan to them.

Wait a minute, why are all of the security doors opening?


weblogs.variety.com

Sees what you did there
2012-12-05 05:19:04 PM
1 votes:

Antimatter: doglover: kim jong-un: doglover: Wade_Wilson: Forgive me if there's a ready answer to this, but why not have a self destruct device on these things?

Doesn't need to be an actual "boom" or anything, I can see why that might be difficult to arrange, but why not a magnet held away from the hard drive by a spring loaded mechanism, which will be released if the machine is powered down without some sort of "mission accomplished" signal from home base?

Because that's a rube goldberg idea. C4 does a better job than a magnet, first off. Second, a spy drone isn't exactly a spy plane. It hasn't got much worth self destructing. You can build one yourself.

Anything of value should zeroize once antitamper is triggered.

Zeroize? How would that help. You can, with governmental budgets, build a machine to read a zeroized hard drive. You can't, howevever, read a melted one. Thermite or something like it. Assuming anything of value's on the drone at all. With $10,000 you can probably buy one. Not just a model, but that actual drone.

you never want an explosive self destruct, too much a chance that it could go off accidentally and get your own people killed.


My rule: If it must self destruct, it damn well better leave a crater you could park a Buick in.

That pretty much limits you to missiles. Anything else? No self destruct. Although those Iron Key super paranoid USB drives somehow trash themselves. No idea how that works. Needs more boom.
2012-12-05 05:17:11 PM
1 votes:

Gyrfalcon: archichris: The drone is a model used by several Gulf States......


SO literally it may have been borrowed from a neighbor.

Do they know they can order MRE's from ebay, then they can claim to have captured our top secret super food technology.

"It's made of food."


THEY'RE MADE OUT OF MEAT
2012-12-05 04:57:42 PM
1 votes:
Iran is the master of trolling.

When Obama asked for our RQ-170 drone back, they kindly sent him this one, and painted it pink, Obama's favorite color.

i.imgur.com

I wouldn't put it past them if Iran succeeded again. It's a huge embarrassment to diplomatic relations and the rest of the world, and egg on the face of the defense contractors.
2012-12-05 04:46:23 PM
1 votes:
I was able to hack into the Iranian Revolutionary Guards database and extract this highly classified picture of the drone in question:

www.enemyplanet.com
2012-12-05 04:39:48 PM
1 votes:
Unfortunately for the Iranians, the drone was full of photoshops of their missile launches, so it didn't tell them anything they couldn't learn from Googling "Iranian photoshops".
2012-12-05 04:34:59 PM
1 votes:
And now they have a virus.
2012-12-05 04:26:18 PM
1 votes:
It could just be a hilarious way for us to deliver a trojan to them.
2012-12-05 04:20:33 PM
1 votes:
2012-12-05 04:17:19 PM
1 votes:
At least they'll get a chuckle out of it.

img1.fantasticfiction.co.uk
2012-12-05 04:15:54 PM
1 votes:
encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com
2012-12-05 02:00:01 PM
1 votes:
Many Bothans died to bring us this information
2012-12-05 01:48:22 PM
1 votes:
This is worse than FartghaziGate.
 
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