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(Yahoo)   The US government sighs heavily, puts up a blog post assuring people the world will not end on Dec 21. Of course, if they're wrong, it'll be kinda hard to call them on it   (news.yahoo.com) divider line 51
    More: Amusing, sighs, Nibiru, mayan calendar, Haiti earthquake, Blogging, comets, string theory, amateur astronomers  
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1871 clicks; posted to Geek » on 04 Dec 2012 at 2:23 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-04 12:52:47 PM  
A NASA scientist said he's received several letters from young people contemplating suicide because they believe the apocalypse is coming.

Who f*cking cares? The people that are planning on killing themselves before the "apocalypse" were probably planning on doing it anway, now they just have something to blame it on. Let em do it, we need to filter out the idiots in the gene pool a little bit anyway.
 
2012-12-04 01:19:11 PM  
A NASA scientist said he's received several letters from young people contemplating suicide because they believe the apocalypse is coming.

And this is a bad thing... how?
 
2012-12-04 01:23:50 PM  

scottydoesntknow: A NASA scientist said he's received several letters from young people contemplating suicide because they believe the apocalypse is coming.

Who f*cking cares? The people that are planning on killing themselves before the "apocalypse" were probably planning on doing it anway, now they just have something to blame it on. Let em do it, we need to filter out the idiots in the gene pool a little bit anyway.


Because that's what science farking does, it fights the good fight, against overwhleming odds to save people from the consequences of their own fear, ignorance and/or stupidity
 
2012-12-04 01:28:29 PM  
Crap, looks like I better make that mortgage payment after all...
 
2012-12-04 01:29:33 PM  
"...authorities in France are planning to block access to a southern mountain which believers think could serve as a mystical place of refuge on Dec. 21."

Surely that won't make people panic any more.
 
2012-12-04 01:39:43 PM  
"The world will not end on December 21, 2012, or any day in 2012," the post says.

But what about 2013? Oh man did they screw up. I'm onto them now! Time to start stockpiling.
 
2012-12-04 01:54:04 PM  

Eddy Gurge: "The world will not end on December 21, 2012, or any day in 2012," the post says.

But what about 2013? Oh man did they screw up. I'm onto them now! Time to start stockpiling.


I'm sure you'll get plenty of advance warning before the next scheduled apocalypse. I myself can't attend the Dec 21 apocalypse because my friend is getting married, but the Harold Camping apocalypse was a hoot. I think the next one is sometime next summer. Keep your calendar clear.
 
2012-12-04 02:02:59 PM  
Regardless, I plan to spend the day drunk just in case.
 
2012-12-04 02:08:16 PM  
My birthday is the 19th and I intend to take it and the 20th off.

When my coworkers ask what I'll be doing I intend to have some fun with them.
 
2012-12-04 02:38:34 PM  
Look... I missed my ride on the space ship behind the Hale-Bopp comet... don't mess this one up for me too.
 
2012-12-04 02:44:44 PM  
Send me your stuff. I promise I won't keep it if the world doesn't end.
 
2012-12-04 02:47:36 PM  
That means I won't finish my damn thesis?.
 
2012-12-04 02:48:16 PM  
Of course, the Republicans don't plan on doing anything about the Fiscal Cliff until the Friday before they go on Christmas Vacation.

Of course, whatever they agree to will be the end of the world.
 
2012-12-04 02:52:54 PM  
This is exactly what the government wants you to think, so you'll not panic and work right up to the end while they fill ships full of gold and rich people then sail off into the sunset with a bunch of Chinese slaves to rebuild the world.

/I hated that movie.
/Honestly tho, does the world actually end on that day or is it just the start of the end?
/Because if its only starting that may mean we've got weeks or months left.
/Its important to know because I want to use up as much of my vacation time as possible.
 
2012-12-04 02:57:27 PM  

way south: This is exactly what the government wants you to think, so you'll not panic and work right up to the end while they fill ships full of gold and rich people then sail off into the sunset with a bunch of Chinese slaves to rebuild the world.

/I hated that movie.
/Honestly tho, does the world actually end on that day or is it just the start of the end?
/Because if its only starting that may mean we've got weeks or months left.
/Its important to know because I want to use up as much of my vacation time as possible.


This is what will happen:

In the Poetic Edda poem Völuspá, references to Ragnarök begin from stanza 40 until 58, with the rest of the poem describing the aftermath. In the poem, a völva recites information to Odin.

The völva then describes three roosters crowing: In stanza 42, the jötunn herdsman Eggthér sits on a mound and cheerfully plays his harp while the crimson rooster Fjalar (Old Norse "hider, deceiver") crows in the forest Gálgviðr. The golden rooster Gullinkambi crows to the Æsir in Valhalla, and the third, unnamed soot-red rooster crows in the halls of the underworld location of Hel in stanza 43.

After these stanzas, the völva further relates that the hound Garmr produces deep howls in front of the cave of Gnipahellir. Garmr's bindings break and he runs free.

The "sons of Mím" are described as being "at play", though this reference is not further explained in surviving sources.[13] Heimdall raises the Gjallarhorn into the air and blows deeply into it, and Odin converses with Mím's head. The world tree Yggdrasil shudders and groans. The jötunn Hrym comes from the east, his shield before him. The Midgard serpent Jörmungandr furiously writhes, causing waves to crash. "The eagle shrieks, pale-beaked he tears the corpse," and the ship Naglfar breaks free thanks to the waves made by Jormungandr and sets sail from the east. The fire jötnar inhabitants of Muspelheim come forth.

The völva continues that Jötunheimr, the land of the jötnar, is aroar, and that the Æsir are in council. The dwarves groan by their stone doors. Surtr advances from the south, his sword brighter than the sun. Rocky cliffs open and the jötnar women sink. People walk the road to Hel and heavens split apart.

The gods then do battle with the invaders: Odin is swallowed whole and alive fighting the wolf Fenrir, causing his wife Frigg her second great sorrow (the first being the death of her son, the god Baldr). The god Freyr fights Surtr and loses. Odin's son Víðarr avenges his father by rending Fenrir's jaws apart and stabbing it in the heart with his spear, thus killing the wolf. The serpent Jörmungandr opens its gaping maw, yawning widely in the air, and is met in combat by Thor. Thor, also a son of Odin and described here as protector of the earth, furiously fights the serpent, defeating it, but Thor is only able to take nine steps afterward before collapsing. After this, people flee their homes, and the sun becomes black while the earth sinks into the sea, the stars vanish, steam rises, and flames touch the heavens.

The völva sees the earth reappearing from the water, and an eagle over a waterfall hunting fish on a mountain. The surviving Æsir meet together at the field of Iðavöllr. They discuss Jörmungandr, great events of the past, and the runic alphabet. In stanza 61, in the grass, they find the golden game pieces that the gods are described as having once happily enjoyed playing games with long ago (attested earlier in the same poem). The reemerged fields grow without needing to be sown. The gods Höðr and Baldr return from Hel and live happily together.

The völva says that the god Hœnir chooses wooden slips for divination, and that the sons of two brothers will widely inhabit the windy world. She sees a hall thatched with gold in Gimlé, where nobility will live and spend their lives pleasurably. Stanzas 65, found in the Hauksbók version of the poem, refers to a "powerful, mighty one" that "rules over everything" and who will arrive from above at the court of the gods (Old Norse regindómr),[19] which has been interpreted as a Christian addition to the poem.[20] In stanza 66, the völva ends her account with a description of the dragon Níðhöggr, corpses in his jaws, flying through the air. The völva then "sinks down." It is unclear if stanza 66 indicates that the völva is referring to the present time or if this is an element of the post-Ragnarök world.
 
2012-12-04 03:01:09 PM  
"The world will not end on December 21, 2012, or any day in 2012," the post says.

THAT'S JUST WHAT THE 0BAMUNIST FAILED MARXIST REGIME WANTS YOU TO THINK!!!11
 
2012-12-04 03:01:21 PM  
TFA: America is not alone in trying to placate nervous doomsayers. The Russian government has made similar assurances to its people that the end of the world is not nigh, and authorities in France are planning to block access to a southern mountain which believers think could serve as a mystical place of refuge on Dec. 21.

I'm tempted to say that this last is a bad idea. The odds of people rioting in the hopes of slipping past the barricade are too high. Just set up a basic security detail at the mountain, let December 21 pass in all its boring uneventfulness, and then shoo the people away.
 
2012-12-04 03:03:29 PM  

Millennium: TFA: America is not alone in trying to placate nervous doomsayers. The Russian government has made similar assurances to its people that the end of the world is not nigh, and authorities in France are planning to block access to a southern mountain which believers think could serve as a mystical place of refuge on Dec. 21.

I'm tempted to say that this last is a bad idea. The odds of people rioting in the hopes of slipping past the barricade are too high. Just set up a basic security detail at the mountain, let December 21 pass in all its boring uneventfulness, and then shoo the people away.


Or, let them there and they can make their own town. Full of crazies, and drugs, and booze, and sex...
 
2012-12-04 03:04:45 PM  

Magorn: Because that's what science farking does, it fights the good fight, against overwhelming odds to save people from the consequences of their own fear, ignorance and/or stupidity


Also Christianity. Believing anybody who commits suicide goes straight to Hell forever, we strive to build a world so pleasant and accepting, no one would ever want to die to escape it.

/sarcasm off
// try s/grace/unconditional love
/// for a change
 
2012-12-04 03:04:47 PM  
Mayan Apocalypse ??? 2012 What??
 
2012-12-04 03:04:58 PM  

scottydoesntknow: A NASA scientist said he's received several letters from young people contemplating suicide because they believe the apocalypse is coming.

Who f*cking cares? The people that are planning on killing themselves before the "apocalypse" were probably planning on doing it anway, now they just have something to blame it on. Let em do it, we need to filter out the idiots in the gene pool a little bit anyway.


There are jurisdictions which will hold you liable if you know someone's contemplating suicide and you just step back. Basic reassurance is a good way to ensure that YA is firmly C'd.
 
2012-12-04 04:04:24 PM  
I vote for a vacuum metastability event. If the apocalypse is going to come, none of this "thousand years of darkness" bullshiat; let it be instantaneous and total.
 
2012-12-04 04:14:20 PM  
Neil deGrasse Tyson @neiltyson

Things you might say if you flunked Astro101: "The world will end on December 21, 2012."

Things you might say if you flunked Astro101: "The Mayans knew more about the universe than do modern-day scientists"

Hard to take science cues from the Maya, who never discovered the wheel, and who sacrificed animals to satisfy gods.

Hard to take seriously predictions about the end of the world from the Maya, a culture that could not predict its own demise.

Worried about "Solar Max"? It's next year, not in 2012. Peaking every 11 years, this one is expected to be milder than most.

Worried about the alignment of Earth, the Sun, and the Galactic Center on Dec 21st? An "event" as common as your birthday.

Get Rich Quick: If you fail to convince your friends the world won't end, then offer to relieve them of their needless wealth.

Things you might say if you flunked Astro101: "The tide comes in. The tide goes out. You can't explain that."
 
2012-12-04 04:15:54 PM  

scottydoesntknow: A NASA scientist said he's received several letters from young people contemplating suicide because they believe the apocalypse is coming.

Who f*cking cares? The people that are planning on killing themselves before the "apocalypse" were probably planning on doing it anway, now they just have something to blame it on. Let em do it, we need to filter out the idiots in the gene pool a little bit anyway.


Not only that.. but even if the world was going to end on dec 21st, why would you kill yourself weeks before it happens? I'd imagine it would be a fantastic light show.
 
2012-12-04 04:51:02 PM  

CygnusDarius: words


Yeah, but where do the Valkyries with their tig ol bitties fit into this scheme?
 
2012-12-04 05:01:02 PM  
We travel eight hours every other Christmas to see the wife's family. The only downer is I could have gotten out of it this year.
 
2012-12-04 05:02:37 PM  
So.....I shouldn't have maxed out my credit cards and spent my kids college money??
 
2012-12-04 05:18:57 PM  

scottydoesntknow: The people that are planning on killing themselves before the "apocalypse" were probably planning on doing it anway,


They're killing themselves because they are going to die. The only thing I can see is an issue about control.
 
2012-12-04 05:31:10 PM  
May I point out that the Mayans never once mentioned anything being destroyed, and that December 21, 2012 is merely the date on which that calender happens to end?
 
2012-12-04 05:32:34 PM  
Wait, I'm getting really nervous about this. Not that the world will end, but that people are taking it seriously. Are people going to riot or something?
 
2012-12-04 05:36:57 PM  

Keizer_Ghidorah: May I point out that the Mayans never once mentioned anything being destroyed, and that December 21, 2012 is merely the date on which that calender happens to end?


And the dumb farkers didn't even account for leap years, so the apocalypse should've happened months ago
 
2012-12-04 05:41:59 PM  
What's weird about this apocalypse kerfuffle is that unlike Harold Camping or the usual less than well wrapped Christians claiming the end of the world is coming its the new agers and the folks of only a passing familiarity with organized religion who are panicking this time.
 
2012-12-04 06:55:13 PM  

scottydoesntknow: Keizer_Ghidorah: May I point out that the Mayans never once mentioned anything being destroyed, and that December 21, 2012 is merely the date on which that calender happens to end?

And the dumb farkers didn't even account for leap years, so the apocalypse should've happened months ago


If I recall, the long run calendar came about because of shiat like that.
They couldn't make a cyclical year accurately, so they made one year that would just keep going until they came up with something better.

/and since they couldn't predict their own end, any implication that they can predict the end of everything is rather weak.
 
2012-12-04 07:12:02 PM  
C.G.P. Grey on 2012

There are also a few good videos of Neil deGrasse Tyson debunking the so-called "Mayan apocalypse", but this video offers some background on the Mayan calendar.
 
2012-12-04 07:53:27 PM  
NASA used to have better things to do.
 
2012-12-04 07:54:33 PM  

Delawheredad: What's weird about this apocalypse kerfuffle is that unlike Harold Camping or the usual less than well wrapped Christians claiming the end of the world is coming its the new agers and the folks of only a passing familiarity with organized religion who are panicking this time.


In any large enough group of people, there will be nuts.
 
2012-12-04 08:18:47 PM  

LargeCanine: NASA used to have better things to do.


I don't know; taking an hour or so to write an article that may help alleviate depressingly-widespread panic strikes me as a pretty good thing to do.
 
2012-12-04 08:34:47 PM  

rufus-t-firefly: Neil deGrasse Tyson @neiltyson


Worried about the alignment of Earth, the Sun, and the Galactic Center on Dec 21st? An "event" as common as your birthday.



No, but I am worried about getting drunk on Dec 21st, since it is my birthday.
 
2012-12-04 09:52:39 PM  
A Belgian amateur astronomer named Patrick Geryl has set up an online community for people who follow him and believe the world will end in three weeks. He tells followers to stockpile 15 to 20 pairs of shoes and to be in good physical shape.

Wait. Why shoes?
 
2012-12-04 10:57:55 PM  

Skyrmion: A Belgian amateur astronomer named Patrick Geryl has set up an online community for people who follow him and believe the world will end in three weeks. He tells followers to stockpile 15 to 20 pairs of shoes and to be in good physical shape.

Wait. Why shoes?


He's trying to save as many soles as possible,
 
2012-12-04 11:15:52 PM  

amfv: Skyrmion: A Belgian amateur astronomer named Patrick Geryl has set up an online community for people who follow him and believe the world will end in three weeks. He tells followers to stockpile 15 to 20 pairs of shoes and to be in good physical shape.

Wait. Why shoes?

He's trying to save as many soles as possible,


I lol'd.
 
2012-12-04 11:26:19 PM  
How many people actually believe the world will end on 12/21?

And if you did believe that why would you believe the government wasn't lying about it not ending?

And if it were going to end I suppose the government would lie about it to avoid mass panic.
 
2012-12-05 12:34:06 AM  
Wait wait wait...aren't we were supposed to be preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse?
 
2012-12-05 01:24:58 AM  
Why kill yourself or such if the apocalypse is coming? Seems like lot of extra work for something that'll take care of itself handily.
 
2012-12-05 02:40:33 AM  

scottydoesntknow: Keizer_Ghidorah: May I point out that the Mayans never once mentioned anything being destroyed, and that December 21, 2012 is merely the date on which that calender happens to end?

And the dumb farkers didn't even account for leap years, so the apocalypse should've happened months ago


The Mayans actually had three calendars: one that was essentially a solar calendar, another that was a religious calendar, and a third calendar that was used for keeping historical records. This third calendar is the only one that's relevant to the issue, because this is the one that some people are using to predict the end of the universe.

This long-count calendar isn't a calendar as much as a counting system. You know how we use a base-10 counting system? (10, 100, 1000, 10,000 etc.) The Mayans used a modifed base-20 counting system for keeping track of days - the second cycle went up to 18 rather than 20. So they tracked days in cycles of 20, 360, 7200, 144000, 2880000, etc.

We're coming to the end of one of the 144,000 day cycles. The concept of leap-years is irrelevant to this calendar system, because it's not based on solar years, simply on pure math. I've got no opinion of whether the calculated date of the end of the cycle is accurate. But if it is inaccurate, it's for reasons that have nothing to do with leap years.

/Doesn't believe the world will end
//I just like reading the various theories for what'll happen
///Using the occasion to get hammered with friends
 
2012-12-05 03:32:22 AM  
So...does this mean the GOP will vote to end the world on the 21st? I mean, it seems like the next depressingly logical step for them.
 
2012-12-05 10:52:33 AM  

Magorn: scottydoesntknow: A NASA scientist said he's received several letters from young people contemplating suicide because they believe the apocalypse is coming.

Who f*cking cares? The people that are planning on killing themselves before the "apocalypse" were probably planning on doing it anway, now they just have something to blame it on. Let em do it, we need to filter out the idiots in the gene pool a little bit anyway.

Because that's what science farking does, it fights the good fight, against overwhleming odds to save people from the consequences of their own fear, ignorance and/or stupidity


It's more like a nice table saw.
 
2012-12-05 10:54:08 AM  
What right does the government have interferring with what belief system I raise my children with?

If I want to teach them that the true path to spiritual salvation has been determined by the wise Mayans then that is my business and noone elses.
 
2012-12-05 10:58:59 AM  

LargeCanine: Delawheredad: What's weird about this apocalypse kerfuffle is that unlike Harold Camping or the usual less than well wrapped Christians claiming the end of the world is coming its the new agers and the folks of only a passing familiarity with organized religion who are panicking this time.

In any large enough group of people, there will be nuts.

 
2012-12-05 01:32:33 PM  
The US government also promised the Cornplanter indians that they could keep their land in perpetuity. Then took it from them in the early 1960's to build the Kinzua dam. Should we believe them now?
 
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