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(CNN)   Good news, everybody. Mitt Romney has managed to land a job   (politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com) divider line 87
    More: Cool, Marriott, romney, Jim Acosta, Mitt Romney  
•       •       •

24692 clicks; posted to Main » on 04 Dec 2012 at 2:40 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2012-12-04 01:42:15 AM
15 votes:

Therion: So now the in-room porn is handicapped?


Okay... just for you!

www.washingtonpost.com
"Hi..ummmm, yes, this is Mitt in room 1201. When I checked in, I specifically requested that the porn in my room be disabled. Yes, DISABLED. I'm a Mormon, for cryin' out loud! No, it most certainly is not!"

ofb.net
"Oh.. sir, I'm so sorry about that. I'll get that taken care of right away."

www.thetimes.co.uk
"Aaahh, much better... ooooohhh, crutches! Yeah, baby!"
2012-12-04 01:58:15 AM
12 votes:

PacManDreaming: Wonder how long until they figure out how to outsource all the rooms to China?


mjcdn.motherjones.com
"Can we do that?"
2012-12-04 04:15:41 AM
9 votes:
Marriott directors received a base pay of $60,000 and $110,000 in Marriott stock in 2011, the most recent year for which pay has been disclosed to the Securities and Exchange Commission.

images.politico.com
"I had to take a lower-paying position to avoid the Obama tax hikes!"
2012-12-04 03:28:07 AM
8 votes:
"Hello. Front desk?"

"yes"

"This is mister Brown in room 877"

"Yes Mr Brown, how can I help you?"

"well I have a complaint"

"Oh no sir. please tell us what is wrong so we can assist you"

"well, the bed isn't made, the sheets are dirty, there's no toilet paper, and no soap in my room"

"you have to understand sir, There are 47 percent of the people who will go to a motel 6 no matter what. All right, there are 47 percent who are with them, who are dependent upon maids, who believe that they are victims, who believe that maids and room service have a responsibility to care for them, who believe that they are entitled to clean sheets, toilet paper, soap, to you name it. That that's an entitlement. And the hotel should give it to them. So our job is not to worry about those people-we'll never convince them that they should take personal responsibility and care for their rooms. Now if you'll excuse me Mr Brown, and please, enjoy your stay at the Marriott, and have a nice day."
2012-12-04 07:41:44 AM
7 votes:
I've finally figured out how Mitt and Annie chose baby names:

i1162.photobucket.com
2012-12-04 12:57:58 AM
7 votes:
"It is an honor to once again be able to serve in the company of leaders like Bill Marriott and Arne Sorenson and to support the work of the tens of thousands of Marriott associates who make Marriott International the renowned success that it is," Romney wrote in a statement distributed by Marriott.

Anybody catch the name of the company he landed with?
2012-12-04 12:37:23 AM
7 votes:
Nice to see that he's landing on his feet. I mean, I'm sure that we were all worried that he'd just wind up on the couch eating Cheetos and smoking bowl after bowl, right?
2012-12-04 04:50:50 AM
6 votes:

Haliburton Cummings: amazing to see a Loser like that after Palin come in on the reality show of cheese that is Dumberican politics


Oh god, please don't give them ideas...

New, from the creators of Sarah Palin's Alaska that haven't yet been drug into the street and shot, it's

keyetv.com
MITT ROMNEY'S EGALITARIA!

www.biography.com
"Mitt, Rafalca went poopie on the front lawn again! Do something!"

melaniekillingervowell.files.wordpress.com
"Ummm....."

www.goddiscussion.com
"Dad, they're out of my hair gel!"

media.salon.com
"Errr......"

i.perezitos.com
"Dad, this thing won't stop crying! What do I do?"

a.scpr.org
"Oooohhh, I....uh......."

bloximages.chicago2.vip.townnews.com
"Daaaaa-aaaaaad, Mom put Rafalca up the car elevator again and my Audi is still stuck in the garage and I have to be at work in like fiiiiiiive minutes!"

www.motherjones.com
"Darn it! I told her not to...."

photos.lasvegassun.com
"Dad, why don't we have any sisters?"

static2.businessinsider.com
"Aw jeez...."
2012-12-04 01:55:29 AM
6 votes:

Somacandra: Its not going to be that profitable for them going forward anyway--when you've got hi-speed wireless in any room, why pay the hotel extra for porn?


kpel965.com
"Wait, hold up a second... You're saying there's porn on the Internet? I bet that's another one of Obama's gifts!"
2012-12-04 12:23:20 AM
6 votes:
Really? That's great. I was really sweating how he was going to make ends meet.
2012-12-03 11:31:49 PM
6 votes:
See? That's one less unemployed person under Romney's leadership right there!
2012-12-04 04:52:27 AM
5 votes:
He was spotted taking in the latest installment of the "Twilight" movie franchise with his family

Yes well that is a good start, but in my eyes he still hasn't suffered enough.
2012-12-04 04:29:24 AM
5 votes:

Mega Steve: He's the perfect example of the American can-do attitude. Sure he didn't to be president, but did he let that get him down? No! He pulled himself up by his bootstraps, went banging on doors, and sending out resumes. He got a nice job that probably pays more and has better benefits than the one he tried to get last month! And as an added bonus, he gets an office right near where his son Tagg works. If I ever want to show my son what a real American can achieve when he started with nothing, I'll show him a picture of Mitt Romney.

And when he's bad and I want to scare him, I'll show him pictures of Mitt's son

[tn.loljam.com image 500x313]


www.mockpaperscissors.com
I knew that picture of Tagg reminded me of someone, whom I couldn't place. Tonight, I have had the perfect amount of beer to recall.
/do you hear the music?
//I do
///Monday night drunken slashies!
2012-12-04 03:33:23 AM
5 votes:
He's the perfect example of the American can-do attitude. Sure he didn't to be president, but did he let that get him down? No! He pulled himself up by his bootstraps, went banging on doors, and sending out resumes. He got a nice job that probably pays more and has better benefits than the one he tried to get last month! And as an added bonus, he gets an office right near where his son Tagg works. If I ever want to show my son what a real American can achieve when he started with nothing, I'll show him a picture of Mitt Romney.

And when he's bad and I want to scare him, I'll show him pictures of Mitt's son

tn.loljam.com
2012-12-04 01:19:56 AM
5 votes:
25.media.tumblr.com
2012-12-04 12:53:25 AM
5 votes:
While Mitt was on the board of Marriott, prior to leaving in 2011 to run for President, Marriott and Romney made millions of dollars a year from porn. In-room porn rentals at their hotels amounted to an average of $175 per guest every year.
Of course, the hotel chain said they were phasing out in-room porn; some say it was to placate the social conservatives. And even then, they just kinda vaguely said they would slowly phase out porn from most of their new hotels.
So, Mitt, Marriott and the Mormons: pornographers.
2012-12-04 06:41:10 AM
4 votes:

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: Oh look! A liberal hatefest. Geesh people, he lost. Find a new conservative person or cause to vent your hate on.


i1162.photobucket.com
2012-12-04 04:52:41 AM
4 votes:

teeny: Exactly how much does Ann struggle, health-wise? Is her smile always so close to a grimace? Other than her speech at the convention, I can't think of any single instance of her smile looking natural rather than forced. I always wonder if it's because she's physically ill or because she's just a biatch.


scm-l3.technorati.com
"I am smiling."
2012-12-04 04:26:29 AM
4 votes:
Mitt Romney's father, former Michigan Gov. George Romney, named his son Willard Mitt Romney after J. Willard Marriott, the family's patriarch.

www.brueckadvertising.com
"Wait, NOW he says he's named after that hotel guy? That clown will say ANYTHING to get a job, won't he?"
2012-12-04 02:35:31 AM
4 votes:

hammettman: "Cool?"

Is my sarcasm detector broken?


Would you rather he go back to campaigning?
2012-12-04 02:13:44 AM
4 votes:

Lionel Mandrake: DAMMIT HE... ONCE ATE PASTA OFF IRONING BOARDS


img.fark.net
"With a widdle magic dust on top!"
2012-12-04 01:30:58 AM
4 votes:

hubiestubert: Nice to see that he's landing on his feet. I mean, I'm sure that we were all worried that he'd just wind up on the couch eating Cheetos and smoking bowl after bowl, right?


d1j2diro5xke84.cloudfront.net
"Dude... Wait, what?"
2012-12-04 12:55:00 AM
4 votes:
Who?
2012-12-04 09:23:24 AM
3 votes:
How much of this was brought on by Ann telling him, "I am NOT going to have you just lying around one of our houses all day!"
2012-12-04 08:45:15 AM
3 votes:
Romney used to make millions plundering companies and shipping jobs to China, and now he's reduced to making hundreds of thousands for sitting in meetings and nodding his head.

Welcome to the Obama recovery.
2012-12-04 08:01:39 AM
3 votes:
Bain Capital is going to buy up Hostess and suck the filling out of all the Twinkies.
2012-12-04 05:12:43 AM
3 votes:
Apos:

Thank you!

I don't know why farkers bother discussing Rmoney when these threads should be a celebration of Tiny Face Romney. That's why they exist. 

img829.imageshack.us
2012-12-04 03:25:50 AM
3 votes:
In related news: Marriott suddenly billions of dollars in debt and on the verge of declaring bankruptcy.
2012-12-04 12:34:10 AM
3 votes:
Wonder how long until they figure out how to outsource all the rooms to China?
2012-12-04 12:19:38 AM
3 votes:
He'll do anything for free lodging. Only the little people pay for hotel rooms.
2012-12-04 11:12:42 AM
2 votes:

stoli n coke: Like McCain and Sarah Palin, you have to own that you wanted Mitt to be the tiny face of your party.


FTFY.

cf.broadsheet.ie
2012-12-04 09:51:05 AM
2 votes:

Propain_az: So all Marriott are being moved to China? amirite? That's what mean and evil Rich Romney does, right? Is he going to fire all the minorities that work at Marriott? and then move all the hotels to china? Of course! oh, and deny the employees healthcare! war on women, biatches! Yeah, and mormon's are weird! Tax the rich! I am such a clever little liberal democrat!


Conservative humor everyone........I do find your ignorance funny, but only because you think you were being clever.
2012-12-04 09:07:55 AM
2 votes:
I guess he didn't list Sheldon Adelson as a reference.
2012-12-04 08:17:15 AM
2 votes:

BastardoGrande: Another reason to stay at a Hilton hotel.

in the hotel Chevrolet
2012-12-04 05:39:06 AM
2 votes:
25.media.tumblr.com 

Where we goin?! The Marriott?
2012-12-04 05:09:04 AM
2 votes:
www.biography.com
"Who farted y'all?"
2012-12-04 04:48:04 AM
2 votes:

Haliburton Cummings: Dumberica


I take all of your comments seriously and believe you have a high intellect.
2012-12-04 03:55:53 AM
2 votes:

natmar_76: See, America? This is what happens when you pull up your bootstraps: you get a job on a board of directors.

It's just that easy.


Why don't people just get nice jobs from the heirs of the tycoon that their CEO/Governor dad named them after?

fkn moochers. 

THIS IS HOW ROMNEYS ACTUALLY THINK
2012-12-04 03:19:29 AM
2 votes:
So he went from possibly being the leader of the free world to working for a Mormon-owned mid-level hotel chain?

haha!.jpg
2012-12-04 03:15:47 AM
2 votes:

ecmoRandomNumbers: Marriott -- catering the world's whitest food to America's college students.


I had forgotten the food. *shudder*

Survival tip for those going to college in towns smaller than the campus: If you don't have a car, become really good friends with someone who does.
2012-12-04 03:13:28 AM
2 votes:

tinfoil-hat maggie: ox45tallboy: Lionel Mandrake: DAMMIT HE... ONCE ATE PASTA OFF IRONING BOARDS

[img.fark.net image 460x276]
"With a widdle magic dust on top!"

I love you so much : )
/So many pics to so many responses : )


captionsearch.com
2012-12-04 02:02:10 AM
2 votes:

Triumph: ladyfortuna: So one of his buddies took pity on him? Must be nice.

Well he is named after J. Willard Marriott.


DAMMIT HE WORKED FOR EVERY PENNY AND ONCE ATE PASTA OFF IRONING BOARDS
2012-12-04 01:45:45 AM
2 votes:

tallguywithglasseson: Anybody catch the name of the company he landed with?


whattupmyguy.com
"Really?"
2012-12-04 01:14:38 AM
2 votes:
Mitt Romney had rejoined their board of directors, a position he held prior to his White House bid.

so like 10 years ago?
2012-12-04 06:07:33 PM
1 votes:
So which old money Aristocrat is he blowing now??
2012-12-04 04:23:59 PM
1 votes:

Elmo Jones: dmax: Brilliant, sir!

/curtsey


I took the liberty of creating this:

i759.photobucket.com
2012-12-04 01:22:18 PM
1 votes:

hammettman: "Cool?"

Is my sarcasm detector broken?


In the world of business, this guy can probably do, although not good, something society approves of, i.e. making his company money. So yeah, it's cool, or at least socially approvable, to do something that isn't destructive.

/How I read it, anyway
//This is his natural turf and where he wants to be, and where he excels. He's back there. Good for him.
2012-12-04 01:21:44 PM
1 votes:
Romney has maintained a longtime friendship with members of the Marriott family, who like him are members of the Mormon church and who also own a vacation home on Lake Winnipesaukee in Wolfeboro, New Hampshire.

yup... Republicans like Mitt pull themselves up by the bootstraps! Not due to help, not from connections etc ..no siree bob! they built everything from scratch!
2012-12-04 12:47:35 PM
1 votes:
This job opening wasn't listed on careerbuilder for some reason...
2012-12-04 12:21:09 PM
1 votes:

sprawl15: whidbey: It's still annoying.

Most of us would be living it up at age 65 if we had anywhere near as much wealth.

But no, Mittens has to be "working" because it's the American Way or some bullshiat.

yes it is always annoying when rich people have jobs


Somebody, a working class somebody else, really NEEDS that job, BUTT, NOO.
2012-12-04 11:52:23 AM
1 votes:

occamswrist: Haters gonna hate.


Gotta admit, he makes it easy.
Sort of a,,,, low hanging Hate.
2012-12-04 11:25:44 AM
1 votes:
So now when you check into a Marriott you'll find a bible and a douche bag in every room.
2012-12-04 11:10:03 AM
1 votes:

tallguywithglasseson: "It is an honor to once again be able to serve in the company of leaders like Bill Marriott and Arne Sorenson and to support the work of the tens of thousands of Marriott associates who make Marriott International the renowned success that it is," Romney wrote in a statement distributed by Marriott.

Anybody catch the name of the company he landed with?


Yeah. It's Mormon, Inc.
2012-12-04 10:02:50 AM
1 votes:

Propain_az: So all Marriott are being moved to China? amirite? That's what mean and evil Rich Romney does, right? Is he going to fire all the minorities that work at Marriott? and then move all the hotels to china? Of course! oh, and deny the employees healthcare! war on women, biatches! Yeah, and mormon's are weird! Tax the rich! I am such a clever little liberal democrat!


Election still got you down? lol

Cry moar.
2012-12-04 09:56:08 AM
1 votes:
Praise be to Mammon.
2012-12-04 09:02:35 AM
1 votes:
...and to support the work of the tens of thousands of Marriott associates who make Marriott International the renowned success that it is," Romney wrote

Was one of those employees the guy/gal who torpedoed your campaign with the 47% tape? Prob not too keen on supporting that person.
2012-12-04 08:54:07 AM
1 votes:
Good news, everybody. Mitt Romney has managed a hand job

/I need to slow down when reading headlines
2012-12-04 08:35:04 AM
1 votes:

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: Oh look! A liberal hatefest. Geesh people, he lost. Find a new conservative person or cause to vent your hate on.



no.
2012-12-04 08:29:31 AM
1 votes:

chunk75: So he returns to business....expanding a hotel chain that employs tens if not hundreds of thousands and that's *bad*? Would you farkers be happier if he sat counting his money? Oh wait...nothing would make you happy.


Obama's re-election made me happy.
2012-12-04 08:24:43 AM
1 votes:

keylock71


I used to see these types of people when I was younger and working at restaurants and bars on Cape Cod during the Summers. They're pleasant and polite enough as long as things are going their way... but you see their real side when something doesn't go their way. ...or they have to wait for something. ... or they can't get something they want. etc. etc.


It's easy to grin
when your ship comes in
and you've got the stock market beat.
But the man who's worthwhile
is the man who can smile
when his shorts are too tight in the seat.
2012-12-04 08:16:59 AM
1 votes:

chunk75: So he returns to business....expanding a hotel chain that employs tens if not hundreds of thousands and that's *bad*? Would you farkers be happier if he sat counting his money? Oh wait...nothing would make you happy.


I know I'll sleep better at a Marriott knowing that a significant chunk of my room fare went to men like Romney that are breaking their backs to ensure I have a pleasant, comfortable stay and not to the filthy maids and desk clerks who expect to get paid for nothing more than glorified housework.
2012-12-04 08:08:12 AM
1 votes:
So another job where he doesn't have to work.
2012-12-04 07:57:52 AM
1 votes:

whidbey: I guess I don't understand why someone with hundreds of millions of dollars needs a job, but that's just me.


It's easier to launder money if you have an alternate source of income.
2012-12-04 07:47:55 AM
1 votes:
In related news, all Marriot hotels to be painted white.
2012-12-04 07:44:59 AM
1 votes:

keylock71: david_gaithersburg: A job, something most elected officials have never had.

It's hilarious that you think Romney has ever worked a day in his pampered, entitled life.


I heard that when he and his biatch were slumming it during their college years they had to eat canned tuna one time.

And they actually had to prepare it themselves. Just imagine it. Preparing canned tuna without the help of a servant.

It must have really stuck in Romney's craw that Obama won this election.
2012-12-04 07:33:19 AM
1 votes:

david_gaithersburg: A job, something most elected officials have never had.


It's hilarious that you think Romney has ever worked a day in his pampered, entitled life.
2012-12-04 07:31:50 AM
1 votes:
Farnsworth: Good news, everyone! Ive hired a former presidential candidate to help retool our company and make it more efficient at package delivery!
2012-12-04 07:30:39 AM
1 votes:

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: Oh look! A liberal hatefest. Geesh people, he lost. Find a new conservative person or cause to vent your hate on.


Why would we forget that less than one month ago, you and your birthbagger brethren wanted Mitt Romney to have the most powerful job in the whole farking country? Just because Fox News and Rush decided to start playing the "we never really liked him anyway" narrative less than 5 minutes after the election was called, doesn't mean that non-idiots are buying it.

Like McCain and Sarah Palin, you have to own that you wanted Mitt to be the face of your party.
2012-12-04 07:26:17 AM
1 votes:
See how easy it is to get a good paying job, you lazy poors?

If you just pull yourself up by your bootstraps, one of your millionaire cronies will hire you, too.
2012-12-04 07:24:55 AM
1 votes:
This is bad news....for the employees of Marriott.
2012-12-04 06:56:07 AM
1 votes:
Sorry, Mitt, sitting on a corporate board is not a "job". You're not producing anything.
2012-12-04 06:23:26 AM
1 votes:

Wyalt Derp: What, no gig on Fox?


Now what the hell would he do at Fox? I mean, at Marriot he will be able to cut wages, hire illegals, strip pension funds, cook the books and then sell them or close them down and sell the properties to make money to put in his 100 million dollar "IRA".
2012-12-04 05:34:49 AM
1 votes:
Can't wait for the overpriced, filtered Wi-Fi and sh*tty food to become even more so.
2012-12-04 05:18:49 AM
1 votes:
www.trbimg.com 

That dudes the sickest, we hate him, because he had eggs for a bath, gonna throw up tonight.
2012-12-04 05:12:31 AM
1 votes:
www.washingtonpost.com

"Is this what humanoid creatures call... Fun?"
2012-12-04 04:46:32 AM
1 votes:
Judging by the picture... He looks like a bellhop
2012-12-04 04:05:21 AM
1 votes:
Another reason to stay at a Hilton hotel.
2012-12-04 03:59:27 AM
1 votes:

log_jammin: "you have to understand sir, There are 47 percent of the people who will go to a motel 6 no matter what. All right, there are 47 percent who are with them, who are dependent upon maids, who believe that they are victims, who believe that maids and room service have a responsibility to care for them, who believe that they are entitled to clean sheets, toilet paper, soap, to you name it. That that's an entitlement. And the hotel should give it to them. So our job is not to worry about those people-we'll never convince them that they should take personal responsibility and care for their rooms. Now if you'll excuse me Mr Brown, and please, enjoy your stay at the Marriott, and have a nice day."


Awesome.
2012-12-04 03:52:41 AM
1 votes:
Im sure hell be paying as much in taxes as the rest of us average Americans, on top of the modest salary they give him.
2012-12-04 03:48:30 AM
1 votes:

propasaurus: While Mitt was on the board of Marriott, prior to leaving in 2011 to run for President, Marriott and Romney made millions of dollars a year from porn. In-room porn rentals at their hotels amounted to an average of $175 per guest every year.
Of course, the hotel chain said they were phasing out in-room porn; some say it was to placate the social conservatives. And even then, they just kinda vaguely said they would slowly phase out porn from most of their new hotels.
So, Mitt, Marriott and the Mormons: pornographers.


Well, Mitt does know binders full of women...
2012-12-04 03:36:11 AM
1 votes:
See, America? This is what happens when you pull up your bootstraps: you get a job on a board of directors.

It's just that easy.
2012-12-04 03:03:46 AM
1 votes:
Cuz a corporate board seat is a job.

"Hey there buddy! What d'ya say we pay you, I dunno, $500K/year? And you rubber stamp my $20M/year salary and $500M stock gifts? Gee, really, you would be so generous? Gollyy!!"
2012-12-04 03:02:03 AM
1 votes:

hubiestubert: Nice to see that he's landing on his feet. I mean, I'm sure that we were all worried that he'd just wind up on the couch eating Cheetos and smoking bowl after bowl, right?


The sad thing is he could do that for the rest of his life and still have at least 95% of his fortune left over. Andrew Carnegie would have a heart attack.
2012-12-04 02:59:50 AM
1 votes:

Mikey1969: How nice for Mitt... Having been out of work these past 2 months, I know what he was going thru. Ironically enough, I went in and completed MY new-hire paperwork for my new job today... I think Mitt and I were separated at birth.


Congratulations!
2012-12-04 02:55:42 AM
1 votes:

ox45tallboy: hammettman: "Cool?"

Is my sarcasm detector broken?

Would you rather he go back to campaigning?


You have to admit, back in June/July his campagin was good for at least a laugh a day. If the mainstream media would stop taking him seriously and treat him like the ass he is, I wouldn't mind him back on the campaign trail.

Mitt in 2016!
2012-12-04 02:49:03 AM
1 votes:

ox45tallboy: hammettman: "Cool?"

Is my sarcasm detector broken?

Would you rather he go back to campaigning?


If we get Rmoney pictures and captions from you again, you bet!
2012-12-04 12:19:27 AM
1 votes:
Marriott -- catering the world's whitest food to America's college students.
 
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