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(Huffington Post)   Mike Tyson on the day he found wife Robin Givens in bed with Brad Pitt: "I wasn't thinking about attacking him....I was just depressed I couldn't bone her no more"   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 117
    More: Strange, Robin Givens, Mike Tyson, Wife Robin, human beings, Gabriel Aubry, Mindy Kaling, Central Park Zoo, Kourtney Kardashian  
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11966 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 03 Dec 2012 at 1:34 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-03 10:24:30 AM  
In related news, Brad Pitt miraculously escaped a gruesome death in 1988.....
 
2012-12-03 10:25:54 AM  
The ever eloquent, Mike Tyson.

Man, that headline gets funnier each time I read it.
 
2012-12-03 10:28:39 AM  

Rev.K: The ever eloquent, Mike Tyson.

Man, that headline gets funnier each time I read it.


I'm crossing my fingers for a Tyson trifecta.
 
2012-12-03 10:44:44 AM  
Want to make that quote funnier? Read it in the squeaky Mike Tyson voice.

Yes you have to use a lisp, too. Its required.
 
2012-12-03 10:46:35 AM  
Mike Tyson on the day he came to him find wife Robin Givens in bed with Brad Pitt...

Did Mike write the headline as well?
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2012-12-03 10:54:00 AM  
He was probably selling his body for money or something, I don't know. He was very pretty.

Sounds like he barely escaped a pounding.
 
2012-12-03 10:57:59 AM  
"I will always cherish the times we made sweet, sweet love together" = good.
"I will miss boning you" = bad.

/Women are so confusing!
 
2012-12-03 11:00:49 AM  
That might be the funniest thing I'll read this week.
 
2012-12-03 11:09:54 AM  

Babwa Wawa: That might be the funniest thing I'll read this week.


I dunno, the Orly Taitz thread is a strong contender, and it's only Monday.
 
2012-12-03 11:10:02 AM  
"I married the woman of my dreams," Tyson told The Sun in October. "She's not dark like me

thatsracist.jpg
 
2012-12-03 11:31:34 AM  

God Is My Co-Pirate: Babwa Wawa: That might be the funniest thing I'll read this week.

I dunno, the Orly Taitz thread is a strong contender, and it's only Monday.


Try reading "I was just depressed I couldn't bone her no more" in Mike Tyson's voice.
 
2012-12-03 11:40:30 AM  
"I couldn't bone her no more" sounds like an alternative  Marie Laveau lyric "She said grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrraaww.  Another man done gone."
 
I will have to write a jaunty song-story that incorporates this as the chorus.
 
2012-12-03 12:35:58 PM  
How about all but calling Brad Pitt a male prostitute? Funny stuff.
 
2012-12-03 01:26:12 PM  
leerader.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-12-03 01:35:12 PM  

Apos: Rev.K: The ever eloquent, Mike Tyson.

Man, that headline gets funnier each time I read it.

I'm crossing my fingers for a Tyson trifecta.


He did say he thought Brad was pretty. Maybe he shold have checked if the ex and Brad would have swung that way.
 
2012-12-03 01:44:49 PM  
I love it when I hear guys use that term 'bone her.' I just think of that guy from Family Guy, all mouth breathing and quite stupid.
 
2012-12-03 01:45:06 PM  
You've entered a universe where anything that a celebrity does or says comes as no surprise. You've entered...The Tyson Zone.
 
2012-12-03 01:45:29 PM  
You know, the dude is talented, attractive and lives a life that is more privileged than 99.999999% of anyone in history and then he alley oops into sex with Robin Givens AND not being killed by Tyson. I want to know what he did in his last life to get this one.
 
2012-12-03 01:46:21 PM  
Every time Tyson gets interviewed I love him more than before.
 
2012-12-03 01:47:59 PM  

Rev.K: The ever eloquent, Mike Tyson.

Man, that headline gets funnier each time I read it.


And while Mike's beloved by people, Robin Givens? Merely an afterthought.

/there's some justice in the world.
 
2012-12-03 01:52:04 PM  

SockMonkeyHolocaust: You know, the dude is talented, attractive and lives a life that is more privileged than 99.999999% of anyone in history and then he alley oops into sex with Robin Givens AND not being killed by Tyson. I want to know what he did in his last life to get this one.


{in Mike Tyson's voice} Who's in her box?
 
2012-12-03 01:54:58 PM  
"I married the woman of my dreams," Tyson told The Sun in October. "She's not dark like me."

Awwww....

"I want to die with her."

Oh....
 
2012-12-03 02:00:17 PM  
Wow, Brad Pitt has balls bigger than an elephant with testicular cancer...
 
2012-12-03 02:00:26 PM  

SockMonkeyHolocaust: You know, the dude is talented, attractive and lives a life that is more privileged than 99.999999% of anyone in history and then he alley oops into sex with Robin Givens AND not being killed by Tyson. I want to know what he did in his last life to get this one.


Pretty much this. I wonder at which crossroads he sold his soul.
 
2012-12-03 02:04:54 PM  
oi48.tinypic.com
 
2012-12-03 02:05:49 PM  
www.talknerdytomelover.com
 
2012-12-03 02:11:02 PM  
No principal caught sayof? I is disappoint.
 
2012-12-03 02:14:01 PM  
Tyson...Pitt....bone.....sounds like some kind of new barbeque chicken product.
 
2012-12-03 02:16:40 PM  
Mike Tyson is human like anyone else. He just needs a friend, a person to really listen to him. He just needs an ear to chew on.
 
2012-12-03 02:24:05 PM  
Brad and Mike should join a Fight Club.
 
2012-12-03 02:30:49 PM  
Well that gotten my week off to an interesting start.
 
2012-12-03 02:31:28 PM  
*thats*
 
2012-12-03 02:33:40 PM  
So Brad Pitt escapes death and likes the dark meat.

Alright alright alright, way to go Brad!
 
2012-12-03 02:37:25 PM  
Hmmm...possibly getting my face reconstructed via Tyson's fists or defenestrate myself out a 2 story window?

Decisions, decisions.
 
2012-12-03 02:37:40 PM  
I know he's a convicted rapist, and wife beater...and he admits to it, and says he's find his inner peace now at this stage in his life.

But man, he's a f#*king funny quote.

I read all the quotes in the article in his lispy voice, and I made myself lol.
 
2012-12-03 02:40:45 PM  
The part about him calling Pitt a man whore was funny...but it's also funny that Tyson was such a beast back then, that he could beat his wife into so much fear she would divorce him, but he would still go over to bone her.

Hell, since Pitt was a prostitute back then (sarcasm) he probably could have frightened Pitt into a 3some.
 
2012-12-03 02:41:14 PM  
Shows how repeated blows to the head makes ya stupid.

He could have said "Three way!" and gone at it with some DP action on Robin. I mean, come on guys, you'd share with Brad Pitt. It's not like you found she was banging someone below your class.
 
2012-12-03 02:45:38 PM  
tyson trifecta in play
 
2012-12-03 02:46:22 PM  

wildcardjack: Shows how repeated blows to the head makes ya stupid.

He could have said "Three way!" and gone at it with some DP action on Robin. I mean, come on guys, you'd share with Brad Pitt. It's not like you found she was banging someone below your class.


3 way implies that everyone is a willing participant. Somehow I see Tyson knocking out Pitt and when Pitt regains consciousness he finds himself on a park bench covered in newspaper with his ass bleeding raw.
 
2012-12-03 02:49:19 PM  
Is there any corroboration that Givens and Pitt were ever together?

If the only evidence that it happened was Tyson's memory, I'd bet cash it was some random slacker dude and not Pitt.
 
2012-12-03 02:51:39 PM  

leviosaurus: Is there any corroboration that Givens and Pitt were ever together?

If the only evidence that it happened was Tyson's memory, I'd bet cash it was some random slacker dude and not Pitt.


you mean a "hey dude" kind of guy.
 
2012-12-03 02:52:04 PM  

Snarfangel: "I will always cherish the times we made sweet, sweet love together" = good.
"I will miss boning you" = bad.

/Women are so confusing!


Hey, it's a step up from when he told a reporter "I'll fark you till you love me!" at a press conference.
 
2012-12-03 02:53:24 PM  
Brad Pitt
Mike Tyson


Eskimo Bro's 4 lyfe!
 
2012-12-03 02:53:27 PM  
So ladies, it means you can sleep with Brad and now get a burning case of the herp.

/the gift that keeps on giving...forever
 
2012-12-03 02:54:25 PM  

elffster: Want to make that quote funnier? Read it in the squeaky Mike Tyson voice.

Yes you have to use a lisp, too. Its required.


Don't forget to curl your fingers over one side of your face, tattoo-like.
 
2012-12-03 02:54:41 PM  
Why read about it, when you can watch it.

Conan
 
2012-12-03 02:55:57 PM  

FinFangFark: I know he's a convicted rapist, and wife beater...and he admits to it, and says he's find his inner peace now at this stage in his life.

But man, he's a f#*king funny quote.

I read all the quotes in the article in his lispy voice, and I made myself lol.


Add in that Ms. Givens is a world class gold digging biatch and it's funnier.
 
2012-12-03 02:57:23 PM  

FinFangFark: leviosaurus: Is there any corroboration that Givens and Pitt were ever together?

If the only evidence that it happened was Tyson's memory, I'd bet cash it was some random slacker dude and not Pitt.

you mean a "hey dude" kind of guy.


i.chzbgr.com
 
2012-12-03 02:58:33 PM  
I looked through the thread, but Robin Givens in 1988? Gwyneth Paltrow 1995? Jennifer Aniston in ,what, 2000? Present day Angelina Jolie?

He's a jerk.
 
2012-12-03 03:00:33 PM  

SockMonkeyHolocaust: You know, the dude is talented, attractive and lives a life that is more privileged than 99.999999% of anyone in history and then he alley oops into sex with Robin Givens AND not being killed by Tyson. I want to know what he did in his last life to get this one.


MilesTeg: I wonder at which crossroads he sold his soul.


The dude has like, a dozen mewling brats, and a psycho wife. Trust me, he is paying for all of that now with substantial interest.
 
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