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(Buzzfeed)   Eight classic, wonderful toys that were banned forever because children are stupid and hurt themselves with lawn darts   (buzzfeed.com) divider line 192
    More: Sad, Dick Tracy, soprano, Polly Pocket  
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26726 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Dec 2012 at 3:34 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-12-01 04:17:32 PM
One of the four uranium ores included was Po-210 (Polonium)


Chemistry - apparently not taught in high school anymore.


The Madd Mann: Dear Mr. DiSabitino,

Please learn how to read the periodic table.

Thank you.


Furthermore, you're doing nothing to reverse the world's perception of us as morons. Kindly shut up.

Love,

The Rest of America
 
2012-12-01 04:19:43 PM
Meh. I saw not ONE mention of GI Joe and "The Eight Ropes of Danger".
 
2012-12-01 04:20:13 PM

pxlboy: reklamfox: Yeah, kids are stupid alright. It's kind of their thing. Along with eating small toys, aren't dumb kids also eating those Tide washing machine packets?

Man, I'm glad I wasn't that dumb as a kid.

My friend's fiancee was dumb enough to put one of these into the dishwasher with the wrapper still on. I saw it at the bottom of the dishwasher, wrapper intact. She's not the brightest bulb in the fixture.

[www.staticwhich.co.uk image 246x158]


that is awesome. reminds me of a girl Brian on Family Guy was dating. she would call Brian with questions like "how does Cheers & Jeers in the TV Guide work?". voiced by Drew Barrymore. what a great character.
 
2012-12-01 04:20:58 PM

Rufus Lee King: This was one of my favorite toys way back when. At some point, a kid managed to drown himself with one. Tragic, of course, but who knew such a thing was possible?

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 500x430]

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 240x180]


I remember that. The smiley-face "safety" hood came off, and the wild hose managed to whack a kid square in the mouth and lodged there, pouring water into his lungs.
 
2012-12-01 04:22:17 PM
And now that I think about it....are "caps" still available for sale? That is, those things you could either put in a cap-gun or smash the whole wad with a hammer and start a fire?
 
2012-12-01 04:22:29 PM

HotWingAgenda: I kind of understood all of them except the Dick Tracy action figure. They didn't describe anything harmful about it.


I was wondering about the ages 4 and up rating. It seems that little knife would go straight into the mouth.
 
2012-12-01 04:23:32 PM

FightDirector: OK, radiation, I can see that...burnt crotches, rarely fun...doll that eats people, okay, I'm not seeing anything really...

Wait...children's books. Farking children's books?! How many farking pages of a book does one have to eat to get a level of lead that even registers, given the microscopic amounts of ink it actually takes to print a book?


You're not allowed to question regulations. They're for the children, and no amount of common sense (or impulse to preserve children's literature) will be allowed in the way.
 
2012-12-01 04:24:36 PM

Cerebral Knievel: Lsherm: scottydoesntknow: [s3-ec.buzzfed.com image 625x611]

This looks like a Fallout fanatic's wet dream. Hell I'd take one. Captures the 1950s Sci-Fi perfectly.

I've already been all over eBay, these things are harder to find than Lindsay Lohan's sobriety.

And if you ever find one, especially in the condition as pictured, they start around $5000


Hhheeeeyyyyy, that's about 10x of what Lindsay Lohan is worth!
 
2012-12-01 04:24:46 PM

MelGoesOnTour: And now that I think about it....are "caps" still available for sale? That is, those things you could either put in a cap-gun or smash the whole wad with a hammer and start a fire?


It seems so.
 
2012-12-01 04:25:10 PM

HotWingAgenda: I kind of understood all of them except the Dick Tracy action figure. They didn't describe anything harmful about it.


FTA:
What's that? Steve the Tramp Action Figure sounds lamer than The Soprano's finale? Well you're right, but he wasn't banned for being a snooze fest. The action figure, released along with the 1990 Dick Tracy film, came in a box printed with the phrase "ignorant bum...you'll smell him before you see him." This offended a few people, causing Steve to be kicked to the curb (poor choice of words).

So not harmful, but offensive to smelly bums.
 
2012-12-01 04:25:36 PM

HotWingAgenda: pxlboy: reklamfox: Yeah, kids are stupid alright. It's kind of their thing. Along with eating small toys, aren't dumb kids also eating those Tide washing machine packets?

Man, I'm glad I wasn't that dumb as a kid.

My friend's fiancee was dumb enough to put one of these into the dishwasher with the wrapper still on. I saw it at the bottom of the dishwasher, wrapper intact. She's not the brightest bulb in the fixture.

[www.staticwhich.co.uk image 246x158]

To be fair, there's a competing brand that makes something like that with a dissolvable wrapper that you have to leave on.


If you saw how she loaded the dishwasher, you would understand. She has almost zero spatial reasoning skills...or any skills, for that matter. And she's ridiculously-lazy.
 
2012-12-01 04:26:00 PM
I have one of those derringers, but alas, not the buckle or shootin' shell.
 
2012-12-01 04:26:01 PM

Mugato: I don't know, some of those don't seem unreasonable to ban.


trivial use of my dark powers: Buckyballs were specifically marketed for adults. If you're dumb enough to give them to your kids maybe removing the snowflakes from the gene pool is the right thing to do.


This. Just got some for myself while I still could, and there are multiple warnings that they are for adults only and are harmful if swallowed; at least 3 on the packaging. When you order from their website there is a big yellow warning that you must set a check box in stating that you will not give them to children or allow them to be left out near children.
 
2012-12-01 04:26:11 PM

pxlboy: HotWingAgenda: pxlboy: reklamfox: Yeah, kids are stupid alright. It's kind of their thing. Along with eating small toys, aren't dumb kids also eating those Tide washing machine packets?

Man, I'm glad I wasn't that dumb as a kid.

My friend's fiancee was dumb enough to put one of these into the dishwasher with the wrapper still on. I saw it at the bottom of the dishwasher, wrapper intact. She's not the brightest bulb in the fixture.

[www.staticwhich.co.uk image 246x158]

To be fair, there's a competing brand that makes something like that with a dissolvable wrapper that you have to leave on.

If you saw how she loaded the dishwasher, you would understand. She has almost zero spatial reasoning skills...or any skills, for that matter. And she's ridiculously-lazy.


Sooooo... did you hit it?
 
2012-12-01 04:26:37 PM

Mugato: I don't know, some of those don't seem unreasonable to ban.


This. Whenever you can go through your own chemistry set, and come upon something Iran would be interested in obtaining...not a good sign.
 
2012-12-01 04:26:57 PM

buckler: MelGoesOnTour: And now that I think about it....are "caps" still available for sale? That is, those things you could either put in a cap-gun or smash the whole wad with a hammer and start a fire?

It seems so.


Hell yes.
 
2012-12-01 04:27:52 PM

The Downfall: pxlboy: HotWingAgenda: pxlboy: reklamfox: Yeah, kids are stupid alright. It's kind of their thing. Along with eating small toys, aren't dumb kids also eating those Tide washing machine packets?

Man, I'm glad I wasn't that dumb as a kid.

My friend's fiancee was dumb enough to put one of these into the dishwasher with the wrapper still on. I saw it at the bottom of the dishwasher, wrapper intact. She's not the brightest bulb in the fixture.

[www.staticwhich.co.uk image 246x158]

To be fair, there's a competing brand that makes something like that with a dissolvable wrapper that you have to leave on.

If you saw how she loaded the dishwasher, you would understand. She has almost zero spatial reasoning skills...or any skills, for that matter. And she's ridiculously-lazy.

Sooooo... did you hit it?


Christ no.
 
2012-12-01 04:27:54 PM

saturn badger: HotWingAgenda: I kind of understood all of them except the Dick Tracy action figure. They didn't describe anything harmful about it.

I was wondering about the ages 4 and up rating. It seems that little knife would go straight into the mouth.


If they did that, they would have to ban like every action figure ever. All GI Joes have things like that, and so do Barbies. TFA just says something about a lame joke on the package.
 
2012-12-01 04:28:05 PM

MelGoesOnTour: Meh. I saw not ONE mention of GI Joe and "The Eight Ropes of Danger".


I have seen Peter North and the Seven Ropes of Danger, but yours sounds a bit, well, gayer.
 
2012-12-01 04:30:25 PM

Teknowaffle: MelGoesOnTour: Meh. I saw not ONE mention of GI Joe and "The Eight Ropes of Danger".

I have seen Peter North and the Seven Ropes of Danger, but yours sounds a bit, well, gayer.


Yeah, I think that Joe comes with "Dutch Rudder Grip".
 
2012-12-01 04:30:31 PM
pxlboy: My friend's fiancee was dumb enough to put one of these into the dishwasher with the wrapper still on.

Maybe she thought it was one of those one shot packages where it dissolves.

www.burnetti.comsharing.kxan.comcbsdallas.files.wordpress.com

Speaking of which, that last image reminds me of another toy that's on the way to banning (once they're done with buckyballs).

Water balz (or generically "water beads")

Polymer balls that absorb water and expand (and they have a consistency close to those rubber bouncy balls that are sold in vending machines, just more brittle).

graphics8.nytimes.com

Some kid ate one and it expanded in their intestines and blocked it, required surgery to remove.

And this kid, is below the recommended age bracket.
2.bp.blogspot.com

// the evil side of me wonders what these things would do in plumbing
 
2012-12-01 04:31:47 PM

The Downfall: HotWingAgenda: I kind of understood all of them except the Dick Tracy action figure. They didn't describe anything harmful about it.

FTA:
What's that? Steve the Tramp Action Figure sounds lamer than The Soprano's finale? Well you're right, but he wasn't banned for being a snooze fest. The action figure, released along with the 1990 Dick Tracy film, came in a box printed with the phrase "ignorant bum...you'll smell him before you see him." This offended a few people, causing Steve to be kicked to the curb (poor choice of words).

So not harmful, but offensive to smelly bums.


Someone was afraid of offending all of the children of homeless people that were going out buying new toys? I don't wanna live in this world any more.
 
2012-12-01 04:33:35 PM

Rufus Lee King: This was one of my favorite toys way back when. At some point, a kid managed to drown himself with one. Tragic, of course, but who knew such a thing was possible?

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 500x430]

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 240x180]


i291.photobucket.com
 
2012-12-01 04:34:23 PM
pxlboy: My friend's fiancee was dumb enough to put one of these into the dishwasher with the wrapper still on.

Speaking of which, I never understood why those were even necessary. Even the old ass dishwasher from the 80s (that I just replaced) had a dispenser on the inside to just pour the liquid/solid into. Why do we need individually packaged detergent servings?

// some of the GIS images I posted might have been detergent for clothes washers, but still, detergent packs for dishwashers do exist.

// my new washer also has a dispenser built in
 
2012-12-01 04:35:07 PM
I remember my parents got my sister and I one of those slip and slide things. That was stupid of us. The back and front yards are not even surfaces. They also have rocks and other such things; not comfortable to slide unless you find a perfectly level yard.
 
2012-12-01 04:35:48 PM
I want my goddam jarts back governmentards!!

/shakes tiny fist
//misses the lawn jart battles.
 
2012-12-01 04:35:52 PM
David Hahn is furiously fapping to the picture of the Atomic Energy Lab.

He's also probably saying: Damn! That would have saved me from having to steal smoke detectors!
 
2012-12-01 04:36:22 PM

talkertopc: Another "want" vote for the Gilbert U-238 Atomic Energy Lab. I'd love to see the instruction manual in pdf format.


I bet the instruction manual glows in the dark.

/Used to own a Seiko self-winding watch with fluorescent dials from radium, I believe. Had it on me 24/7. Wonder when my arm is going to fall off from radiation poisoning.
 
2012-12-01 04:37:17 PM

HotWingAgenda: Someone was afraid of offending all of the children of homeless people that were going out buying new toys?


Don't forget all of the Fark Class Warriors, White Knights, and Advocates-For-People-Who-Never-Asked-For-Their-Help. They need to be offended for someone, damnit. That's, like, activism.
 
2012-12-01 04:39:15 PM

Teknowaffle: MelGoesOnTour: Meh. I saw not ONE mention of GI Joe and "The Eight Ropes of Danger".

I have seen Peter North and the Seven Ropes of Danger, but yours sounds a bit, well, gayer.


ecx.images-amazon.com 

Sheesh....
 
2012-12-01 04:41:17 PM
s3-ec.buzzfed.com

PLUS

s1.jrnl.ie

EQUALS

anongallery.org
 
2012-12-01 04:41:47 PM

lordargent: pxlboy: My friend's fiancee was dumb enough to put one of these into the dishwasher with the wrapper still on.

Speaking of which, I never understood why those were even necessary. Even the old ass dishwasher from the 80s (that I just replaced) had a dispenser on the inside to just pour the liquid/solid into. Why do we need individually packaged detergent servings?



More idiot-proof. More expensive. Pre-metered doses don't allow you to use less product for lighter loads. What's not to love?
 
2012-12-01 04:42:45 PM

Rufus Lee King: This was one of my favorite toys way back when. At some point, a kid managed to drown himself with one. Tragic, of course, but who knew such a thing was possible?
]


I'm currently reading Triggerfish Twist and a character was actually killed with one of those.

/Serge is twisted, but amusing at times.
 
2012-12-01 04:43:49 PM
"Belt Buckle Derringer Toy Gun" Had one as a kid. Great toy, always good for nailing bad guys who aren't very smart.
 
2012-12-01 04:43:57 PM
www.retroland.com

Now with NEW Super brain cell killing fumes!
 
2012-12-01 04:43:58 PM
Buckyballs were never for kids. They had warnings on them specifically warning parents to keep them away from children.
 
2012-12-01 04:44:37 PM

Gergesa: I remember my parents got my sister and I one of those slip and slide things. That was stupid of us. The back and front yards are not even surfaces. They also have rocks and other such things; not comfortable to slide unless you find a perfectly level yard.


When I was a kid I saw a guy's exposed kneecap because of the slip and slide. There was a big party or something, and it was set up on this hill behind the houses, and apparently unbeknownst to all there was a jagged, rusty metal stake of some sort sticking out of the hill. The guy who hit it wasn't the first to go down the thing by a long shot. Tore his knee wide open. I guess it really wasn't the slip and slide's fault, but after that I refused to go down waterslides of any kind for a long, long time.
 
2012-12-01 04:45:22 PM
snopes re: lead in books etc...

Link
 
2012-12-01 04:50:13 PM
It's not quite the Atomic Energy Lab, but...

/United Nuclear is awesome.
 
2012-12-01 04:54:01 PM

The Southern Dandy: [www.retroland.com image 650x300]

Now with NEW Super brain cell killing fumes!


Man, those things smelled awesome.

/I don't remember my own name.
 
2012-12-01 04:55:24 PM

The Southern Dandy: [www.retroland.com image 650x300]

Now with NEW Super brain cell killing fumes!


I remember that one. Holy shiat did that stuff stink.
 
2012-12-01 04:55:24 PM

Rufus Lee King: MelGoesOnTour: And now that I think about it....are "caps" still available for sale? That is, those things you could either put in a cap-gun or smash the whole wad with a hammer and start a fire?

I found some at Dollar General for my recently-acquired "Rifleman" cap-shooter. However, those caps are not like the ones you might remember from your childhood. Wimpy as hell, I'm talking. They hardly make any noise at all.

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 850x195]

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 850x532]


Heh. The ones I'm thinking of came in a paper roll about an inch in diameter. They worked REALLY well. The fact that the gunpowder was impregnated on a readily combustible paper surface, heh, it's now wonder youngin's* back in the 70's were pyro's.

/ Not Me
 
2012-12-01 04:57:35 PM

lordargent: pxlboy: My friend's fiancee was dumb enough to put one of these into the dishwasher with the wrapper still on.

Speaking of which, I never understood why those were even necessary. Even the old ass dishwasher from the 80s (that I just replaced) had a dispenser on the inside to just pour the liquid/solid into. Why do we need individually packaged detergent servings?

// some of the GIS images I posted might have been detergent for clothes washers, but still, detergent packs for dishwashers do exist.

// my new washer also has a dispenser built in


I don't know what's in them, but those individual detergent packs work way better than any combination of liquid/powder detergent and rinse aids that I've tried since phosphates have been removed from consumer detergents here in the US. I got a sample pack of two in the mail and the next two loads that came out of my dishwasher were the cleanest I've seen in a long time. I may buy them when I run out of my current stuff.
 
2012-12-01 04:57:52 PM
Mattel also made a snub nosed 38 special that was banned,it was chrome plated and actual size of the real thing.
It used the the same bullets as the derringer,and greenie stickem caps,some were used in actual robberies,and some kids suffered eye damage due to the plastic bullets,wish I still had mine.
 
2012-12-01 04:58:17 PM

MelGoesOnTour: Rufus Lee King: MelGoesOnTour: And now that I think about it....are "caps" still available for sale? That is, those things you could either put in a cap-gun or smash the whole wad with a hammer and start a fire?

I found some at Dollar General for my recently-acquired "Rifleman" cap-shooter. However, those caps are not like the ones you might remember from your childhood. Wimpy as hell, I'm talking. They hardly make any noise at all.

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 850x195]

[3.bp.blogspot.com image 850x532]

Heh. The ones I'm thinking of came in a paper roll about an inch in diameter. They worked REALLY well. The fact that the gunpowder was impregnated on a readily combustible paper surface, heh, it's now wonder youngin's* back in the 70's were pyro's.

/ Not Me


I meant "No wonder". Damn typos.
 
2012-12-01 05:03:28 PM

The Southern Dandy: [www.retroland.com image 650x300]

Now with NEW Super brain cell killing fumes!


I used to LOVE those! I think I blew out my eardrums trying to inflate them through that tiny tube.
 
2012-12-01 05:06:06 PM

Rufus Lee King: miniflea: Gergesa: I remember my parents got my sister and I one of those slip and slide things. That was stupid of us. The back and front yards are not even surfaces. They also have rocks and other such things; not comfortable to slide unless you find a perfectly level yard.

When I was a kid I saw a guy's exposed kneecap because of the slip and slide. There was a big party or something, and it was set up on this hill behind the houses, and apparently unbeknownst to all there was a jagged, rusty metal stake of some sort sticking out of the hill. The guy who hit it wasn't the first to go down the thing by a long shot. Tore his knee wide open. I guess it really wasn't the slip and slide's fault, but after that I refused to go down waterslides of any kind for a long, long time.

I used to constantly beg my parents to buy me a Slip-N-Slide, and they steadfastly refused. I guess they knew was was best, after all.

They got me a "Bizzy Buzz Buzz" instead. Boring as hell, but the only way you could hurt yourself with one was to deliberately jam it in your eye, which was something I never felt inclined to do.

www.stevebates.biz


WTF is that? Fisher Price "My first tattoo" kit?
 
2012-12-01 05:08:12 PM
The ones I remember well from my childhood were the Battlestar Galactica toy spaceships. They featured these small red plastic projectiles that would "shoot" like laser bolts when you pushed a button. Killed a bunch of kids in the late 70s and early 80s. They revised the toy later so that the "bolts" were captured. They literally just popped out an 1/8 of an inch or so. BORING!
 
2012-12-01 05:09:58 PM

ongbok: WTF is that? Fisher Price "My first tattoo" kit?


The head contained a battery, motor and spinning weight that would cause the pen to vibrate around, making loops and squiggles as you wrote/drew.
 
2012-12-01 05:11:14 PM
media.visionforum.com
 
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