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(Glossy News)   Remember the Unskewed Polls guy? Yeah, this is an interview with him   (glossynews.com) divider line 142
    More: Fail, interview question, Byron York, Scott Rasmussen, exit polls, election days, uniform resource locators  
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6452 clicks; posted to Politics » on 30 Nov 2012 at 10:56 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



142 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-11-30 08:40:17 AM
Its too early in the morning to read this sort of derp. Anyone want to summarize?
 
2012-11-30 08:43:08 AM

SilentStrider: summarize


*jack-off motion*
 
2012-11-30 08:49:46 AM
Remember him? He's gotten more visibility since the election that he had before it.

He's the It Girl of the right-wing blogodome. His Q-rating is off the charts among shut-ins and people who chew their toenails.
 
2012-11-30 08:57:06 AM

kronicfeld: *jack-off motion*


That's hardly an accurate summary, as jacking off at least has the potential to lead to pleasant and sometimes productive results.

I'd say this provides a much more accurate summary, and has the added advantage of not even requiring words.
 
2012-11-30 08:58:45 AM

SilentStrider: Anyone want to summarize?


He's had a few girlfriends, but not that many. Drinks diet Mountain Dew, but very rarely eats Cheetos.
 
2012-11-30 09:02:13 AM

incendi: very rarely eats Cheetos.


i highly doubt that.
 
2012-11-30 09:13:44 AM
Can someone explain the tin foil hat. Does he think he has to go out of his way to look like a nutter?
 
2012-11-30 09:14:48 AM

SilentStrider: i highly doubt that.


I suspect his cheeto intake will ramp up in the period between the Hostess shutdown and the commencement of production by whoever purchases the Twinkie IP.
 
2012-11-30 09:24:16 AM

incendi: He's had a few girlfriends, but not that many. Drinks diet Mountain Dew, but very rarely eats Cheetos.


You know, this could be the beginning of a pretty good folk song about the fella.

You have to imagine a folk/bluegrassy sorta tune, straight out the holler. A few plucking banjo notes here and there, maybe a fiddle.

He's had a few girlfriends, but not all that many
He drinks Mountain Dew, but don't eat no Cheetos
He sits in his basement, he's running on empty
The world wasn't ready to hear what he knows.

The pundits and newsmen, that rascal Nate Silver
They all played a game, one that he knows too well
But when he stood up, when he tried to deliver
The world shrugged its shoulders, and sent him to hell

Oh please won't you sing now of sorry Dean Chambers
Oh please won't you think on him lonely and cold
I fear time is ending for sorry Dean Chambers
He's wearing his tin foil and leaving the fold.
 
2012-11-30 09:25:22 AM

Pocket Ninja: incendi: He's had a few girlfriends, but not that many. Drinks diet Mountain Dew, but very rarely eats Cheetos.

You know, this could be the beginning of a pretty good folk song about the fella.

You have to imagine a folk/bluegrassy sorta tune, straight out the holler. A few plucking banjo notes here and there, maybe a fiddle.


Goddamnit I love you so much.
 
2012-11-30 09:30:51 AM

Pocket Ninja: incendi: He's had a few girlfriends, but not that many. Drinks diet Mountain Dew, but very rarely eats Cheetos.

You know, this could be the beginning of a pretty good folk song about the fella.

You have to imagine a folk/bluegrassy sorta tune, straight out the holler. A few plucking banjo notes here and there, maybe a fiddle.

He's had a few girlfriends, but not all that many
He drinks Mountain Dew, but don't eat no Cheetos
He sits in his basement, he's running on empty
The world wasn't ready to hear what he knows.

The pundits and newsmen, that rascal Nate Silver
They all played a game, one that he knows too well
But when he stood up, when he tried to deliver
The world shrugged its shoulders, and sent him to hell

Oh please won't you sing now of sorry Dean Chambers
Oh please won't you think on him lonely and cold
I fear time is ending for sorry Dean Chambers
He's wearing his tin foil and leaving the fold.


Yet another masterpiece.
 
2012-11-30 09:32:17 AM

mrshowrules: Can someone explain the tin foil hat. Does he think he has to go out of his way to look like a nutter?


Almost makes this look completely and totally fake.
 
2012-11-30 09:47:57 AM

nekom: mrshowrules: Can someone explain the tin foil hat. Does he think he has to go out of his way to look like a nutter?

Almost makes this look completely and totally fake.


Maybe he has a sense of humor about himself.
 
2012-11-30 09:58:00 AM

Pocket Ninja: incendi: He's had a few girlfriends, but not that many. Drinks diet Mountain Dew, but very rarely eats Cheetos.

You know, this could be the beginning of a pretty good folk song about the fella.


*whistles, applauds*
 
2012-11-30 10:59:32 AM
I didn't see anything about his "update" where he listed 5 states as stolen by voter fraud.
 
2012-11-30 11:01:16 AM
WombatControl is doing interviews? Good to see he is still with us.
 
2012-11-30 11:01:19 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2012-11-30 11:02:22 AM

GlossyNews.com: And the last question, and this is very serious, it comes to us from one of our readers, Are you in fact a potato?
Dean Chambers: Am I a potato?

GlossyNews.com: Yeah.
Dean Chambers: [laughs] I went to school in the 70s and they used to show us these film strips that would preach the crap out of us. You are what you eat! I eat potatoes. I guess most of us are potatoes, where we do or do not look like Mr. Potatohead. Just about all of us eat carrots too and you know that just about everyone who has ever eaten carrots has died at some time in their lives.


wat
 
2012-11-30 11:02:47 AM
LOL!
we didn't Photoshop it except to make it fit for width.
 
2012-11-30 11:03:19 AM
To be fair, those are some awesome jowls. I bet he goes as Jabba the Hut every year for Halloween.
 
2012-11-30 11:03:37 AM

Pocket Ninja: He's had a few girlfriends, but not all that many
He drinks Mountain Dew, but don't eat no Cheetos
He sits in his basement, he's running on empty
The world wasn't ready to hear what he knows.

The pundits and newsmen, that rascal Nate Silver
They all played a game, one that he knows too well
But when he stood up, when he tried to deliver
The world shrugged its shoulders, and sent him to hell

Oh please won't you sing now of sorry Dean Chambers
Oh please won't you think on him lonely and cold
I fear time is ending for sorry Dean Chambers
He's wearing his tin foil and leaving the fold.


media.tumblr.com
 
2012-11-30 11:04:09 AM
Wow, his chin(s) tripled in size since the other photo was taken.
 
2012-11-30 11:04:49 AM
glossynews.com

He still looks slightly out of focus here, like the camera thought the tin foil hat was a face.
 
2012-11-30 11:05:56 AM
www.tampabay.com

R.I.P UNSKEWED SKEWED GUY
 
2012-11-30 11:05:58 AM
I got this far ...

glossynews.com

... and determined that I knew as much as I need to know about the guy.
 
2012-11-30 11:06:38 AM
j.wigflip.com
 
2012-11-30 11:08:18 AM
This is a grown-ass man who runs a website called Barack O'Fraudo Dot Com.
 
2012-11-30 11:09:49 AM

Sock Ruh Tease: You are what you eat! I eat potatoes.



Sock Ruh Tease:

Sock Ruh Tease: I eat potatoes.

 
2012-11-30 11:10:10 AM
He seems to go back and forth between saying "yes I was wrong" and "Barack stole the election via mass voter fraud."
 
2012-11-30 11:10:31 AM
OH what the hell happened to my HTML.
 
2012-11-30 11:11:57 AM
glossynews.com

"I'm right with you, Red Three."
 
2012-11-30 11:12:22 AM

Pocket Ninja: incendi: He's had a few girlfriends, but not that many. Drinks diet Mountain Dew, but very rarely eats Cheetos.

You know, this could be the beginning of a pretty good folk song about the fella.

You have to imagine a folk/bluegrassy sorta tune, straight out the holler. A few plucking banjo notes here and there, maybe a fiddle.



I weep speechlessly in silent awe of the magnificence that is Pocket Ninja.
 
2012-11-30 11:13:03 AM

Sock Ruh Tease: Just about all of us eat carrots too and you know that just about everyone who has ever eaten carrots has died at some time in their lives.


Usually at the very end.
 
2012-11-30 11:14:31 AM
I unskewed his face a bit:

i.imgur.com
 
2012-11-30 11:15:37 AM
i-cdn.apartmenttherapy.com
 
2012-11-30 11:20:22 AM
first time ever disappointed with pocket ninja:

The pundits and newsmen, that rascal Nate Silver
They all played a game, one that he knows too well
But when he stood up, when he tried to deliver

Silver does not rhyme with deliver; silver rhymes with.......uhh... orange?
...........
/Something about antepenultimate stress and preantepenultimate stress
 
2012-11-30 11:24:03 AM
...Diet Mountain Dew I do...

And uh... *writes something down* Hehe, Hows that working out for you?
 
2012-11-30 11:24:36 AM

SilentStrider: Its too early in the morning to read this sort of derp. Anyone want to summarize?


I started with my pre-determined conclusion that Romney would win, that anyone not registered as a Democrat was a conservative, and skewed the information on my website to show him as victorious. I knew my numbers were fake, but I was making national news and shiat tons of money from my website. I plan on doing this again so I'm admitting faults in hopes that idiots in the echo chamber will forget that I was a shill and will make me money in the future.
 
2012-11-30 11:26:29 AM
glossynews.com
Unskewed trolls
 
2012-11-30 11:29:06 AM

RubberBandMan: first time ever disappointed with pocket ninja:

The pundits and newsmen, that rascal Nate Silver
They all played a game, one that he knows too well
But when he stood up, when he tried to deliver

Silver does not rhyme with deliver; silver rhymes with.......uhh... orange?
...........
/Something about antepenultimate stress and preantepenultimate stress


On second thought silver does rhyme with "chilver," a female lamb. It seems that this could possibly be worked into the song with meaning.
 
2012-11-30 11:30:15 AM

Thigvald the Big-Balled: I'm right with you, Red Three."


www.robotikon.com
 
2012-11-30 11:30:28 AM

Pocket Ninja: incendi: He's had a few girlfriends, but not that many. Drinks diet Mountain Dew, but very rarely eats Cheetos.

You know, this could be the beginning of a pretty good folk song about the fella.

You have to imagine a folk/bluegrassy sorta tune, straight out the holler. A few plucking banjo notes here and there, maybe a fiddle.

He's had a few girlfriends, but not all that many
He drinks Mountain Dew, but don't eat no Cheetos
He sits in his basement, he's running on empty
The world wasn't ready to hear what he knows.

The pundits and newsmen, that rascal Nate Silver
They all played a game, one that he knows too well
But when he stood up, when he tried to deliver
The world shrugged its shoulders, and sent him to hell

Oh please won't you sing now of sorry Dean Chambers
Oh please won't you think on him lonely and cold
I fear time is ending for sorry Dean Chambers
He's wearing his tin foil and leaving the fold.


Bravo!
 
2012-11-30 11:30:43 AM

flux: Thigvald the Big-Balled: I'm right with you, Red Three."

[www.robotikon.com image 399x300]


+1
 
2012-11-30 11:31:33 AM
"Glossy News is a satirical news publication. All articles contained within, however near to actual stories appearing in the news, should be assumed to be of a fictitious and satirical nature."

If a satire site says it's a real interview.... is it.... satire...?
 
2012-11-30 11:33:48 AM

flux: Thigvald the Big-Balled: I'm right with you, Red Three."

[www.robotikon.com image 399x300]


holy shiat
 
2012-11-30 11:34:07 AM
glossynews.com

Wow, that's a huge goiter!
 
2012-11-30 11:34:36 AM

flux: Thigvald the Big-Balled: I'm right with you, Red Three."

[www.robotikon.com image 399x300]


whoa
 
2012-11-30 11:34:51 AM

RubberBandMan: first time ever disappointed with pocket ninja:

The pundits and newsmen, that rascal Nate Silver
They all played a game, one that he knows too well
But when he stood up, when he tried to deliver

Silver does not rhyme with deliver; silver rhymes with.......uhh... orange?
...........
/Something about antepenultimate stress and preantepenultimate stress


Eh, even though they're similar, the rhyme scheme during the verse is based on lines 2 and 4.

Also, I totally hear PN's work as an Irish folk song, like something from The Troubles.
 
2012-11-30 11:36:50 AM

flux: Thigvald the Big-Balled: I'm right with you, Red Three."

[www.robotikon.com image 399x300]


*swish*
 
2012-11-30 11:37:26 AM

Pocket Ninja: ...Oh please won't you sing now of sorry Dean Chambers
Oh please won't you think on him lonely and cold
I fear time is ending for sorry Dean Chambers
He's wearing his tin foil and leaving the fold.



The tune 'Git Along Little Dogies' fits this perfectly
 
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