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(Illinois State Journal-Register)   This year, Chicago has seen 467 homicides. Plus one guy murdered by an angry gang of swans   (sj-r.com) divider line 85
    More: Weird, Chicago, Villa Park, WBBM  
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5948 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Nov 2012 at 4:07 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-11-29 02:21:30 PM
Well, if you can't tell the difference between a goose and a swan, you may be starting off with a handicap.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2012-11-29 02:49:20 PM
This is (at best) a followup to "When will people learn that you never bring a kayak to a swan fight?" from April.
 
2012-11-29 03:49:01 PM
Sounds like it's a mute point now.
 
2012-11-29 03:57:08 PM

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: Sounds like it's a mute point now.


Clever.
 
2012-11-29 04:05:38 PM
And completely OT Link. Just because, well swans.
 
2012-11-29 04:08:50 PM
That's the chicago way
 
2012-11-29 04:11:14 PM
If only we could bring this outstanding liberal mecca to the national level.
 
2012-11-29 04:12:15 PM
I tell you, I tell you everything. He look, he looka lika man.
 
2012-11-29 04:14:29 PM

Dinobot: That's the chicago way


They bring a kayak, you bring a swan.
 
2012-11-29 04:15:58 PM

Plus one guy murdered by an angry gang of swans


The swan's escaped.

From the castle.

Sincerely,

Peter Ian Staker
 
2012-11-29 04:17:14 PM
If you don't study your P.G. Wodehouse you suffer the consequences.
 
2012-11-29 04:17:24 PM
You know what would solve their swan/good problem?

world.guns.ru
 
2012-11-29 04:17:44 PM

MyRandomName: If only we could bring this outstanding liberal mecca to the national level.


We'd all be up to our necks in swans then.
 
2012-11-29 04:17:50 PM
Wow. DC is on pace to have its lowest number of homicides since 1963.
 
2012-11-29 04:17:53 PM
to be fair, the guy kinda looked like a pig and was munching on a fried egg at the time
 
2012-11-29 04:19:40 PM
Let's sell Detroit to Chicago then give Canada Illinois.

Goose.
 
2012-11-29 04:20:02 PM
The original 'Angry Birds'
img577.imageshack.us
 
2012-11-29 04:20:35 PM
467! Holy Shiat. I thought the WELL under 100 a year we have in Toronto was bad.
 
2012-11-29 04:20:43 PM
cdn.hark.com
 
2012-11-29 04:22:03 PM
In a cruel twist, the same swans played Taps on their trumpets at his funeral.
 
2012-11-29 04:22:03 PM

MyRandomName: If only we could bring this outstanding liberal mecca to the national level.


To be fair, I believe that the murder rate was going down...until the handgun ban was declared unconstitutional, at which point gun murders have started to go up. There's probably a reason why fox news doesn't use Chicago as a comparison / contrast when gun rules change.

//actually weather probably has a larger factor in gun murders than gun laws...who the heck is going to go out and cap someone when it's 10 degrees below zero. The last few winters have been exceptionally mild.
 
2012-11-29 04:23:03 PM

jeffreyh: Let's sell Detroit to Chicago then give Canada Illinois.

Goose.


No, no. Illinois gets divided down the middle. The West half goes to Missouri and the East half goes to Indiana.

And Chicago simply goes to Hell.
 
2012-11-29 04:23:20 PM
This year, Chicago has seen 467 homicides.

They televise them out there? Is that on basic cable or is it a premium channel?
 
2012-11-29 04:23:45 PM

ShadowLAnCeR: You know what would solve their swan/good problem?

[world.guns.ru image 500x203]


That firearm is prohibited, as an "assault weapon", in Cook County as a means of preventing high rates of violent crime.

/It is also restricted as a "destructive device" under the National Firearms Act.
 
2012-11-29 04:25:26 PM

snowshovel: MyRandomName: If only we could bring this outstanding liberal mecca to the national level.

To be fair, I believe that the murder rate was going down...until the handgun ban was declared unconstitutional, at which point gun murders have started to go up. There's probably a reason why fox news doesn't use Chicago as a comparison / contrast when gun rules change.

//actually weather probably has a larger factor in gun murders than gun laws...who the heck is going to go out and cap someone when it's 10 degrees below zero. The last few winters have been exceptionally mild.


Of course, the flip side is, when it's ten degrees below zero, you're trapped inside with your family, so I would expect domestic violence to rise in that weather.
 
2012-11-29 04:25:28 PM

Chinchillazilla: In a cruel twist, the same swans played Taps on their trumpets at his funeral.


Oh hell, child hood flashback. WTH was the name of that book. Trumpet of the Swan.

Damn, it's been 20 years since I've thought of that book.
 
2012-11-29 04:26:22 PM
Tell Chief Keef the swans disrespected him. Problem solved.
 
2012-11-29 04:29:57 PM
Detroit has had 343 homicides so far this year. Come on Detroit! Slackers.
 
2012-11-29 04:31:00 PM
See even Chicago has it's instances of white-on-white gang-related crime.
 
2012-11-29 04:32:50 PM
Better than falling prey to a vicious gang of keep left signs.
 
2012-11-29 04:33:09 PM

Zafler: Chinchillazilla: In a cruel twist, the same swans played Taps on their trumpets at his funeral.

Oh hell, child hood flashback. WTH was the name of that book. Trumpet of the Swan.

Damn, it's been 20 years since I've thought of that book.


I loved it as a kid. I don't really remember it now, but all those E.B. White "animals-doing-human-activities" books were right up my alley.
 
2012-11-29 04:34:41 PM

Englebert Slaptyback: Plus one guy murdered by an angry gang of swans


The swan's escaped.

From the castle.

Sincerely,

Peter Ian Staker


Ha ha. Very funny. PIS taker. I get it.
 
2012-11-29 04:35:17 PM
www.dneg.com

The swan's escaped.
 
2012-11-29 04:35:32 PM
A goose, not a swan, but still...oblig?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6OStX_wrWGg
 
2012-11-29 04:36:39 PM

snowshovel: MyRandomName: If only we could bring this outstanding liberal mecca to the national level.

To be fair, I believe that the murder rate was going down...until the handgun ban was declared unconstitutional, at which point gun murders have started to go up. There's probably a reason why fox news doesn't use Chicago as a comparison / contrast when gun rules change.

//actually weather probably has a larger factor in gun murders than gun laws...who the heck is going to go out and cap someone when it's 10 degrees below zero. The last few winters have been exceptionally mild.


Feel free to explain all the years before the handgun ban where the murder rate was higher:

i.imgur.com

80% of the murders in Chicago are gang related. Them boys give zero farks if they are legally or illegally carrying a weapon. If the cops come around, it's probably because they've already broken several laws.
 
2012-11-29 04:36:41 PM
Likely victim:

thetvjunkie.net
 
2012-11-29 04:36:55 PM
When you play the game of swans, you win or you die.
 
2012-11-29 04:37:55 PM

Rex Kramer - Danger Seeker: Detroit has had 343 homicides so far this year. Come on Detroit! Slackers.


There were only 345 people left in Detroit at the start of the year so...
 
2012-11-29 04:39:48 PM
They big animals. It is funny watching them take off.
 
2012-11-29 04:41:44 PM

simplicimus: Well, if you can't tell the difference between a goose and a swan, you may be starting off with a handicap.


Best observation is done at close range.

i865.photobucket.com

Yep, that's a goose.
 
2012-11-29 04:42:21 PM
I was attacked by a swan once. It was horrible, and traumatic. Out if water and in attack mode they are the size of a VW bug. Or so it seemed.
 
2012-11-29 04:43:10 PM
Des Plaines is not Chicago.
 
2012-11-29 04:44:25 PM

simplicimus: Dinobot: That's the chicago way

They bring a kayak, you bring a swan.


They bring a swan, you bring a honey badger.
 
2012-11-29 04:44:57 PM
Chicago is known for hotdogs and murder. I wonder if one is related to the other.
 
2012-11-29 04:46:37 PM

Phony_Soldier: Chicago is known for hotdogs and murder. I wonder if one is related to the other.


Only if we catch you putting ketchup on your hotdog.
 
OOF
2012-11-29 04:46:40 PM
Michael Gira may be a person of interest.
 
2012-11-29 04:48:01 PM

Ikam: Phony_Soldier: Chicago is known for hotdogs and murder. I wonder if one is related to the other.

Only if we catch you putting ketchup on your hotdog.


You haven't caught me yet...
 
2012-11-29 04:49:02 PM

snowshovel: To be fair, I believe that the murder rate was going down...until the handgun ban was declared unconstitutional, at which point gun murders have started to go up. There's probably a reason why fox news doesn't use Chicago as a comparison / contrast when gun rules change.


So ... how many of those murders were committed with legally owned handguns?

You do realize that even before the ban, it wasn't exactly hard to drive half an hour outside the city to *legally* purchase a handgun, right? And that if you're into that kind of thing, it's easier and cheaper to acquire a stolen handgun.

Correlation != Causation
 
2012-11-29 04:49:38 PM
Chicago has it's own population control. The rest of the U.S. should take note.
 
2012-11-29 04:50:28 PM
Des Plaines is as old as Chicago. It was originally a commuter resort.
 
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