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(Yahoo)   Ok which one of you farkers in AZ and MO hit the numbers?   (gma.yahoo.com) divider line 53
    More: Spiffy, Powerball  
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2990 clicks; posted to Main » on 29 Nov 2012 at 10:35 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



53 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-11-29 10:37:10 AM
I'm not hitting them but I fap to them
 
2012-11-29 10:37:35 AM
AZMO or ASBO?

cdni.condenast.co.uk
 
2012-11-29 10:39:47 AM
Not me (MO resident). Ah well, I had my $2 worth of fun. Back to the salt mines...
 
2012-11-29 10:41:53 AM
I am from AZ and wish it was me!! Maybe it was one of my friends (crosses fingers)
 
2012-11-29 10:41:58 AM
*slowly raises hand*
 
2012-11-29 10:42:11 AM
I hit one number, the Powerball 6. Woohoo, four bucks!
 
2012-11-29 10:42:19 AM
I hope it's not some tea party survival gun nut that won in Az.
 
2012-11-29 10:43:33 AM
Not me.

/if I won that waste of money, you guys wouldn't see my ass around here again
//I'd be in the Virgin Islands with my *new* friends
 
2012-11-29 10:44:26 AM

PsyLord: I hope it's not some tea party survival gun nut that won in Az.


Why not? That sounds like Waco II: Electric Boogalo to me
 
2012-11-29 10:44:37 AM
I wonder if there will be another fake winner like that sassy Baltimore chick?
 
2012-11-29 10:45:28 AM
Thinking they were a buck, I asked for 5 since I had a fiver. Found out after they were printed that they were 2 bucks. So it cost me 10 bucks to hit one number on one ticket, not the powerball. I guess I still beat the odds, but yup, wasted my 10 bucks.
 
2012-11-29 10:45:51 AM
I wouldn't be posting here if I did... I would be on the look out for a real good attorney and financial planner
 
2012-11-29 10:46:21 AM
I hate when those other people buy my winning tickets instead of me. People who win who are not me suck...unless they give me lots of money.

/then I will.
//CHACHING.
 
2012-11-29 10:47:00 AM
1.bp.blogspot.com

'Hai guize, what's goin on in this thread?'
 
2012-11-29 10:49:15 AM

Marine1: Not me.

/if I won that waste of money, you guys wouldn't see my ass around here again
//I'd be in the Virgin Islands with my *new* friends


virgin islands? You know it's not really full of virgins right?

/the whole world is your oyster and you think virgin islands
//not that it's a crappy place but...
///think BIG!
 
2012-11-29 10:49:48 AM
Had to make a trip to Phoenix yesterday, so dropped ten bucks on a ticket....only missed the jackpot by five damn numbers.....so, so close

/did get the powerball number 06, so I've got that going for me....if I go back to AZ anytime in the next year or so..
 
2012-11-29 10:49:50 AM
3 numbers, no powerball = A cool $7...oh yeah. We're talking 'Two chicks at the same time' money.
 
2012-11-29 10:50:03 AM
When I went to buy my ticket I told the cashier I would like to purchase the winning powerball ticket. Alas, she did not sell me what I wanted...
 
2012-11-29 10:50:35 AM
I think people over 60 should not be able to play the lotto once it gets over a certain amount.
 
2012-11-29 10:51:25 AM
It will be 2 toothless hillbillies that won, as it always is.
 
2012-11-29 10:57:54 AM
Not me. Didn't get a damn number right.

PsyLord: I hope it's not some tea party survival gun nut that won in Az.


If it is, then there is no God and no justice in this world.
 
2012-11-29 10:58:19 AM
www.wearysloth.com

'He's from Missouri, where they're all known to be killers of innocent men, women and children. ''
 
2012-11-29 10:58:59 AM

FarkedOver: It will be 2 toothless hillbillies that won, as it always is.


Cool, looks like my cousin won then.
 
2012-11-29 10:59:03 AM

Vidwiz: I am from AZ and wish it was me!! Maybe it was one of my friends (crosses fingers)


If it is, tell him to buy everybody TotalFark subscriptions.
 
2012-11-29 10:59:49 AM
i134.photobucket.com

I hear it's over in KC, but still - funny.
 
2012-11-29 11:02:45 AM
Well I had my little fun of dreaming about what I would do had I won, so I feel I got my $2.00 worth of fun. Tonight I will get my $13.95 worth of fun from a bottle of rum.
 
2012-11-29 11:06:40 AM
v028o.popscreen.com
 
2012-11-29 11:11:18 AM
Playing the LOST numbers would have earned you $0; only 16 and 23 were drawn last night.
 
2012-11-29 11:12:24 AM

jazz710: 3 numbers, no powerball = A cool $7...oh yeah. We're talking 'Two chicks at the same time' money.


cdn.backyardchickens.com
 
2012-11-29 11:14:17 AM

aharown: Thinking they were a buck, I asked for 5 since I had a fiver. Found out after they were printed that they were 2 bucks. So it cost me 10 bucks to hit one number on one ticket, not the powerball. I guess I still beat the odds, but yup, wasted my 10 bucks.


I beat you. I got one number total (not the powerball) on 10 tickets. I should figure out the odds on that, because it seems unlikely.
 
2012-11-29 11:17:11 AM
I only got the Powerball on one ticket alas, I spent more than I won.

/Arizona
//Could be one of my friends or family members won!
///Maybe the lottery is a tax on people who are bad at math
 
2012-11-29 11:18:55 AM
I had 10 tickets. Hit 2 numbers on one (nuthin), and the powerball on another.

So for $20, I won $4. Yep... That was fun. I asked the guy at the 7-11 if anyone around here had won much... He just said, "eh, few dollars here and there".

So I guess this area was a complete bust. Phoooeee!!!!
 
2012-11-29 11:21:03 AM

MassAsster: I wouldn't be posting here if I did... I would be on the look out for a real good attorney and financial planner


I WON!!!! Allow me to introduce my attorney and my financial planner.
wac.450f.edgecastcdn.net
 
2012-11-29 11:21:49 AM
My wife sent me out to get milk for the kids at 10pm last night and INSISTED I get Powerball tickets.

Right as I was fumbling with the machine to get a couple, she called me to tell me the numbers had already been called...

/you can't win if you don't play
//you can't loose if you don't play, either
 
2012-11-29 11:22:15 AM
My stepdaughter won almost five million on a scratcher this spring. bought decent house, a nice car, and sunk the rest into safe investments. Still works. She still works, she just doesnt worry about anything.

CSB
 
2012-11-29 11:22:44 AM

desertgeek: Not me. Didn't get a damn number right.

PsyLord: I hope it's not some tea party survival gun nut that won in Az.

If it is, then there is no God and no justice in this world.


The stories of idiots who win the lottery are out there, and provide some proof that, whether or not there is a God or justice, idiots who can't manage their money don't typically find much in the way of happiness from receiving more money than most people can feasibly manage.
 
2012-11-29 11:24:53 AM
I got a random ticket, and the numbers were randomly all above 30.

I wasn't even in the same half of the number scale...
 
2012-11-29 11:25:38 AM
some people in my office went in on some tickets and one of them hit all numbers except one, which only amounts to a $10k win. i'm not complaining, since i'm better off than i was yesterday, but it's crazy to think that we were just one number off from the jackpot (7 instead of 22 if you're wondering).
 
2012-11-29 11:30:27 AM

jazz710: 3 numbers, no powerball = A cool $7...oh yeah. We're talking 'Two chicks methheads at the same time' money.


FTFY
 
2012-11-29 11:32:46 AM
"MO money MO problems." --Yung $nAZzy
 
2012-11-29 11:34:16 AM
Living in Va, still daydreaming of all the horrors I would bring to man if I won.

Bought a ticket in cali, they sold the winner there that night
getting lawn bags the next morning, the gal remembered me
and told the news whores..that's him!
on live tv saying congratulations to whoever really won.
3 blocks to my house
5 phone calls from my (then) wife's family asking for sharesies were waiting for me.

ffwd a few years
at Mudville grill in clayton
the girl who was too pretty to talk to me in school is still a waitress there (mid 30s by now)
says she saw me on tv and..did I really win?
...
...
yes, yes I did
 
2012-11-29 11:37:21 AM
Apparently it was bought at the Trex Mart in Dearborn... which, for those of you not familiar with the KC Metro area, is the middle of farking nowhere up in Platte County.

I mean, seriously. Even after federal/state taxes and splitting it with the dude in Arizona, the money this guy will be paying to the city of Dearborn will probably have at least quintupled the tax base there.
 
2012-11-29 11:49:54 AM
Dammit, and I was going to split half of the winnings evenly amongst Total Farkers

Sorry

/go scratch something else
 
2012-11-29 11:59:36 AM
Let's face it, if a farker won that kind of money they wouldn't be on fark right now. They would be waist deep in hookers and blow.
 
2012-11-29 12:02:51 PM

natas6.0: 5 phone calls from my (then) wife's family asking for sharesies were waiting for me.


This is exactly why I would never want to win. You're obligated to identify yourself, then the world is lining up at your door. fark that noise.
 
2012-11-29 12:13:46 PM

chopit: natas6.0: 5 phone calls from my (then) wife's family asking for sharesies were waiting for me.

This is exactly why I would never want to win. You're obligated to identify yourself, then the world is lining up at your door. fark that noise.


You don't have to identify yourself in some states, IIRC.
 
2012-11-29 12:35:56 PM
Arizona's one of those states where you don't have to identify yourself as a lottery winner.

Not that I have such problems in my life.

/Dammit!
 
2012-11-29 12:46:33 PM
My favorite quote so far:

"I guess we'll be able to give out Christmas bonuses," said Trex Mart General Manager Kenny Gilbert. "That's nice, especially at this time of year."
 
2012-11-29 01:54:01 PM
And they say poor people don't pay taxes.
 
2012-11-29 02:01:52 PM
I'd offer Drew a cool 1 million dollars for the fark.com domain name. He can take the forum, and land it somewhere else... I just want to irritate the rest of you idiots that rely on bookmarks for a four letter domain name... and goatse would be rearing it's ugly self at you all again... forever, and ever, amen.

The rest? Hookers and blow of course.
 
2012-11-29 02:33:58 PM
Arizona's winning ticket was bought in Fountain Hills, a town north of Phoenix known for its hills and a big ass fountain.

Wait, doesn't Sheriff Joe live in Fountain Hills?

/Uh oh
 
2012-11-29 05:17:56 PM
There's a guy in my town who won (depending on who I hear it from... I don't know the guy personally) somewhere between a few and ten million in the lottery. He did invest some of it in a business, but he's, apparently, blowing the rest of it, along with the profits from the business, at the local casinos.
 
2012-11-29 06:16:32 PM

Marine1: Apparently it was bought at the Trex Mart in Dearborn... which, for those of you not familiar with the KC Metro area, is the middle of farking nowhere up in Platte County.

I mean, seriously. Even after federal/state taxes and splitting it with the dude in Arizona, the money this guy will be paying to the city of Dearborn will probably have at least quintupled the tax base there.


After doing a quick Google search of the town, I was thinking the same thing. I've probably blinked on the way to St. Joe & missed this place.
/SW Missourian
 
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