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(Slashdot)   Good news: Oceans are not rising like researchers predicted. Bad news: Oceans are rising *faster* than researchers predicted   (science.slashdot.org) divider line 143
    More: Scary, researchers predicted, Electric energy consumption, purpose in life, soylent greens  
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7339 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Nov 2012 at 10:21 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-11-28 08:53:49 AM  
It's just the natural result of the end of the Ice Age 10,000 years ago when solar flares started flaring and made Mars hot. Stupid libs.
 
2012-11-28 08:56:57 AM  
Yay! Raleigh, North Carolina will finally be a port city!
 
2012-11-28 09:13:56 AM  
The problem with these "OMG the sky is falling" climate-change horror predictions is that nobody looks at the big pictures. Oceanographers just look at oceans, Geographers just look at earth. Weatherographers just look at their latest Super Doppler7000 and circle their arms around weather patterns. And so on.

See, data is meaningless when it's taken as an isolated point. See, for example, here's a piece of data:

2230

Impressive, right? Now, if I just told you that number and said it was vitally important, what would happen? I'll tell you what: an entire realm of science would pop into being dedicated to finding out what that number means, how it impacts our life. By the time the 2230ists were finished, the Theory of 2230 would relate to everything. Then other scientists would come along and say, no, you guys are wrong, the real Theory of 2230 is *this*. And so on, and so on, and so on. That's what scientists *do*. They create meaning for things, then other scientists create another meaning, then they argue, then the government gives them grant money.

And here's the kicker: the truth is that 2230 *is* important, but each of them is just looking at it in isolation. Without understanding the big picture. They don't know how all the parts fit together, or even what the parts are. And so they're all wrong.

Don't get it? OK, let's try it this way. Let's pull back the lens a bit, subby, take a look at the situation you're describing. Water levels are rising. Oooh, scary. They're rising faster than predicted. OOOOOOH, scarier. But what happens when you increase the total amount of water in a given surface? Hm?

Volume, remember that? The water's volume increases. OK, see that's something that an oceanographer doesn't consider, because it's about math. So tell me: what happens when a water's volume increases?

That's right, very good. The water becomes heavier. Because there's more of it. Need proof? Here's an experiment for you to conduct: pick up a 5-gallon jug of water. Now pick up a 1-gallon jug. Which is heavier?

So what happens when the water's weight increases? Well, now we're into geography, another part of the big picture. The heavier water pushes down on the ocean's floor. Now, in some places, that will actually make the ocean deeper -- sort of like when the bottom of a plastic dish bows outward. In other places, though, the heavier water won't be able to actually move the floor, but will put tremendous pressure on it. TREMENDOUS pressure. And what happens when you put tremendous pressure on the earth's crust?

That's right, volcanoes. See, now we're into volcanology, which teaches us that magma, which is produced by volcanoes, is earth's building material. The pressure produced by the rising sea will force volcanic eruptions of magma to the surface, which in effect will create new land. So, even as the oceans are rising, land is rising, too. This is how planets get bigger, subby (and -- see? -- we're into astrology now). Do you think the Earth was always this same size? No! Thousands upon thousands of years ago it was much smaller. There was also a lot less water. Now we have lots of water, and lots of land. A few thousand years from now, there will be even more of both. It's the natural way of things. It's science. SCIENCE. But not science studied in isolation, subby. Science as part of the greater whole.
 
2012-11-28 09:24:23 AM  

Pocket Ninja: The problem with these "OMG the sky is falling" climate-change horror predictions is that nobody looks at the big pictures. Oceanographers just look at oceans, Geographers just look at earth. Weatherographers just look at their latest Super Doppler7000 and circle their arms around weather patterns. And so on.

See, data is meaningless when it's taken as an isolated point. See, for example, here's a piece of data:

2230


I [heart] Pocket Ninja. I am now a firm believer in 2230.
 
2012-11-28 10:05:03 AM  
www.dvdtimes.co.uk

Everyone stay calm! This is not happening!
 
2012-11-28 10:07:21 AM  

Sybarite: [www.dvdtimes.co.uk image 600x322]

Everyone stay calm! This is not happening!


♪ Tee, tum! ♫ Tee tum! ♪
 
2012-11-28 10:24:50 AM  
The earth just reinvents itself on a regular basis. Nothing to see here are get excited about.
 
2012-11-28 10:24:52 AM  
No matter how mad it gets, Earth still won't end up like Waterworld.
 
2012-11-28 10:24:57 AM  
Oh, fark, two GW threads posted to Main already, and it's not even noon.

It's going to be one of those days.


I'm gonna need more liquor.
 
2012-11-28 10:25:37 AM  

bim1154: The earth just reinvents itself on a regular basis. Nothing to see here are or get excited about.

 
2012-11-28 10:25:41 AM  
If this is true, why did Al Gore just buy oceanfront property?
 
2012-11-28 10:25:47 AM  
FREE 2230! FREE 2230! FREE 2230!
 
2012-11-28 10:25:51 AM  

Cythraul: Pocket Ninja: The problem with these "OMG the sky is falling" climate-change horror predictions is that nobody looks at the big pictures. Oceanographers just look at oceans, Geographers just look at earth. Weatherographers just look at their latest Super Doppler7000 and circle their arms around weather patterns. And so on.

See, data is meaningless when it's taken as an isolated point. See, for example, here's a piece of data:

2230

I [heart] Pocket Ninja. I am now a firm believer in 2230.


2230 causes autism you heartless bastard
 
2012-11-28 10:27:08 AM  
More beach for everyone!rewardslink.info
 
2012-11-28 10:27:30 AM  
www.webspawner.com
 
2012-11-28 10:27:48 AM  
It's to late to do anything, and we don't know what to do even if we could. It's to complex a system and we've pushed it to far out of whack.

/If you'll excuse me, I've got to mount pontoons to my apartment.
 
2012-11-28 10:28:00 AM  
It's a brand new album for 1990....


obscure?
 
2012-11-28 10:28:33 AM  

Pocket Ninja: 2230


That was beautiful. I read it in a southern car salesman's voice.
 
2012-11-28 10:29:20 AM  
I hate having to drive 3 hours to reach the ocean. The quicker it gets to me the better.

/be right back, melting some icebergs
 
2012-11-28 10:31:05 AM  

bim1154: The earth just reinvents itself on a regular basis. Nothing to see here are get excited about.


The last time the earth "reinvented" itself on a scale like this, the dinosaurs died out (or became chickens).
 
2012-11-28 10:31:45 AM  

Pocket Ninja: astrology


I lost it bad right there. Good thing I wasn't drinking coffee.
 
2012-11-28 10:33:03 AM  
Awesome! The world WON'T be taken over by Zombies, because everyone knows they can't swim!
 
2012-11-28 10:33:54 AM  
Well, of course it seems like the Ocean is rising faster than predicted. Stupid Lib scientists failed to account for the Storm surge from Hurricane Sandy.
 
2012-11-28 10:34:37 AM  

Pocket Ninja: The problem with these...


you are the strangest and most wonderful person on the internets
 
2012-11-28 10:35:26 AM  
Obviously, we need to detonate the Yellowstone caldera to trigger a supervolcano and rapidly cool the Earth for 100 years or so.
 
2012-11-28 10:35:36 AM  
SCARY tag? only too the sheep
 
2012-11-28 10:36:01 AM  

IlGreven: bim1154: The earth just reinvents itself on a regular basis. Nothing to see here are get excited about.

The last time the earth "reinvented" itself on a scale like this, the dinosaurs died out (or became chickens).


This is happening just at the right time. Global Warming=really hot summers=more old people dying of heatstroke=Social Security & Medicare remaining in the black for a longer period.

\ta da!
 
2012-11-28 10:38:08 AM  
In the 260 years since the Industrial Revolution, mankind has managed to destroy a 4.5 billion year old planet. Despite the negative press, you really have to marvel at our power. We are a truly unique and innovative species with more power sitting on our shoulders than all the suns in the universe. If there is life out there on other planets, I cannot imagine it even coming close to our immense strength. We shall rule the universe just as we've ruled the apes of our own planet. Bow at our feet or suffer our wrath!
 
2012-11-28 10:38:20 AM  

IlGreven: bim1154: The earth just reinvents itself on a regular basis. Nothing to see here are get excited about.

The last time the earth "reinvented" itself on a scale like this, the dinosaurs died out (or became chickens).


Your thought process in the overall dynamics of earth's history is pretty weak if that's all you have.
 
2012-11-28 10:38:34 AM  
Better inform Jamie Foxx's "lord and savior" about this. After all didn't he promise that he'd make the oceans recede?
 
2012-11-28 10:38:50 AM  
I need to remember to identify the poster before reading the post, or I spend way too much time blinking quizzically when I stumble across Pocket Ninja content.
 
2012-11-28 10:39:55 AM  

docilej: Better inform Jamie Foxx's "lord and savior" about this. After all didn't he promise that he'd make the oceans recede?


That's it! Let's clone Moses a few hundred times and post him in lighthouses to hold back the water.
 
2012-11-28 10:40:06 AM  
People who mocked Obama for claiming in 2008 that future people would look back at that election as the turning point when we would begin to see the rise of the oceans slow because they thought he was a fool for believing that global warming was real and thought it was a sign of his arrogance that he believed he could cause the sea to recede like some latter-day Moses.

Expect these same people to be complaining about Obama breaking this promise in this topic, before going into another topic within the next month to claim the EPA should be eliminated because it exists only a tool for Obama to attempt to strike down capitalism.
 
2012-11-28 10:42:41 AM  
3.2mm per year?

Are we sure this isn't a natural fluctuation?
 
2012-11-28 10:43:26 AM  
just wait 10 more years we will be back to the global cooling scare

greenplanetethics.com
 
2012-11-28 10:45:07 AM  
So are the environmentalists going to allow geoengineering research, or keep it banned on the grounds that an industrial solution will only encourage more industry, rather than eliminating it?
 
2012-11-28 10:45:12 AM  

HAMMERTOE: If this is true, why did Al Gore just buy oceanfront property?


Because he has THE MONEY.
 
2012-11-28 10:46:16 AM  

Sybarite: [www.dvdtimes.co.uk image 600x322]

Everyone stay calm! This is not happening!


So, walk to where the camera is you idiots!

Jebus only sends so many boats.
 
2012-11-28 10:46:42 AM  
I almost fed the troll.
 
2012-11-28 10:47:50 AM  

sodomizer: 3.2mm per year?

Are we sure this isn't a natural fluctuation?


Is this about 3.2mm? >I I

I am so afeared!
 
2012-11-28 10:49:12 AM  

Pocket Ninja: The problem with these "OMG the sky is falling" climate-change horror predictions is that nobody looks at the big pictures. Oceanographers just look at oceans, Geographers just look at earth. Weatherographers just look at their latest Super Doppler7000 and circle their arms around weather patterns. And so on.

See, data is meaningless when it's taken as an isolated point. See, for example, here's a piece of data:

2230

Impressive,


This is the most impressive I've seen from you so far, kudos to you sir. Keep up the effort. You have made my morning, maybe I will even share this with my physics class and show them the wisdom of the internet.
 
2012-11-28 10:50:40 AM  
But the people who run the satellites say that this satellite data is messed up.
Link
 
2012-11-28 10:52:01 AM  
Scary tag is for Fark linking to Slashdot. My worlds are colliding!
 
2012-11-28 10:52:11 AM  
How can that be an unfetchable link, Fark? I fetched it. Fetch.
Link
 
2012-11-28 10:53:32 AM  
I, too, have found evidence of 2230:

upload.wikimedia.org NEVER FORGET
 
2012-11-28 10:55:42 AM  

spentmiles: In the 260 years since the Industrial Revolution, mankind has managed to destroy a 4.5 billion year old planet. Despite the negative press, you really have to marvel at our power. We are a truly unique and innovative species with more power sitting on our shoulders than all the suns in the universe. If there is life out there on other planets, I cannot imagine it even coming close to our immense strength. We shall rule the universe just as we've ruled the apes of our own planet. Bow at our feet or suffer our wrath!


Wow ... epic stupidity.

Nobody is saying the planet will be destroyed. What is happening is the planet's climate is shifting to a place that will significantly reduce how well it supports human life. The planet will be fine ... human populations will suffer significant negative affects.

If you have to put up a strawman to attack AGW then shouldn't you re-evaluate your position?Or is arguing from lies normal for you?
 
2012-11-28 10:57:01 AM  

clane: just wait 10 more years we will be back to the global cooling scare

[greenplanetethics.com image 400x527]


I found you problem ... you get your science from magazines. Only morons do that.
 
2012-11-28 10:58:35 AM  
Let's just get this out of the way:
i.imgur.com
 
2012-11-28 11:00:28 AM  
I'm just waiting for this stupid species to go extinct, the planet needs new management.
 
2012-11-28 11:00:58 AM  

Farking Canuck: I found you problem ... you get your science from magazines. Only morons do that.


Well, I DO like my subscription to Scientific American (even after the format change), and I read the Economist regularly, but TIME is pretty much out of the question.
 
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