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(CNN)   Thanksgiving by the numbers: 12,000 calls to the Butterball Turkey Line, 17 of which were actually about cooking a turkey   (cnn.com) divider line 46
    More: Interesting, Thanksgiving Day Parade, Christmas Parade  
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5998 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Nov 2012 at 4:35 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



46 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-11-22 12:48:26 PM  
How many was President Bartlett in on?
 
2012-11-22 12:50:36 PM  
How many did Kwame make?
 
2012-11-22 01:22:48 PM  
Wasn't there that one thread in TFD where someone called the Butterball line?
 
2012-11-22 01:50:47 PM  
My sister is a nutritionist and volunteered for the turkey hotline one year. Good gracious, the stories she tells of utter stupidity.

/black trash bag != roasting bag
//yes, you have to thaw the turkey before you cook it
///No, taking a blowtorch to the outside won't help
 
2012-11-22 04:37:21 PM  
Were the rest looking for big women?
 
2012-11-22 04:42:08 PM  
I don't know why we insist on turkey. Wouldn't it b easier to roast four chickens.
 
2012-11-22 04:48:21 PM  

wildcardjack: I don't know why we insist on turkey. Wouldn't it b easier to roast four chickens.


Honey baked ham is your God.
 
2012-11-22 04:49:27 PM  
Cooking normally causes 44% of fires, I'm surprised it only goes up to 69% today.
 
2012-11-22 04:50:49 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: My sister is a nutritionist and volunteered for the turkey hotline one year. Good gracious, the stories she tells of utter stupidity.

/black trash bag != roasting bag
//yes, you have to thaw the turkey before you cook it
///No, taking a blowtorch to the outside won't help


My friend's dad thought you could just fry a frozen turkey. His wife fortunately made him call the hotline before he tried it.
 
2012-11-22 04:54:46 PM  
i47.tinypic.com
 
2012-11-22 04:55:05 PM  
I called them to ask a question about butter and balls

I didn't get to talk with anyone and was reminded about the court ordered PFA still being in effect
 
2012-11-22 05:04:26 PM  
Yes: I have never cooked a live turkey before and my neighbor's kids are scared. In US American children are no better than women!
 
2012-11-22 05:05:17 PM  
How many by R.B. Kazenzakis?
 
2012-11-22 05:12:06 PM  

Threadslayer: Yes: I have never cooked a live turkey before and my neighbor's kids are scared. In US American children are no better than women!


whatsayof?
 
2012-11-22 05:14:23 PM  
Hello, butterball? What style of stuffing goes best with battletoads?
 
2012-11-22 05:21:26 PM  

bill4935: How many by R.B. Kazenzakis?


A moment of silence for a once great strip.

...
 
2012-11-22 05:31:42 PM  

Zulgaines: wildcardjack: I don't know why we insist on turkey. Wouldn't it b easier to roast four chickens.

Honey baked ham is your God.


Yeah, but then you miss the best part of Thanksgiving...leftover turkey sammiches. I swear, they taste 10x better than the actual dinner. But you have to put stuffing and Ruffles in the sammich.

/we do honey baked ham for Xmas
 
2012-11-22 05:32:20 PM  

teto85: How many was President Bartlett in on?


done in one
 
2012-11-22 05:50:31 PM  
Phone sex is phone sex.
 
2012-11-22 05:50:53 PM  
Anybody know the % wastage to a turkey after cooking?
 
2012-11-22 06:01:38 PM  

teto85: How many was President Bartlett in on?


"Can we do this without killing my guests? I'm not saying that's a deal breaker..."
 
2012-11-22 06:04:27 PM  
I almost had to call the hotline today to make sure I knew how many hours you had to cook a 20-pound possum to make sure it was cooked all the way through, but he wouldn't stay in the pot.
 
2012-11-22 06:05:10 PM  
oh-please: Yeah, but then you miss the best part of Thanksgiving...leftover turkey sammiches. I swear, they taste 10x better than the actual dinner. But you have to put stuffing and Ruffles in the sammich.

I'm with ya on the leftover turkey sammiches but I often detect a slight change in the flavor of the turkey after it has been refrigerated (same with leftover mashed potatoes). I've always described it as a "refrigerator taste" (container air tight; nothing wrong with the operation of the fridge - temp OK; no odors inside, etc.). Although I'm not a chemist/biologist/scientist, I've always attributed it to some sort of enzyme activity. Any Farkers please feel free to comment to help me solve this mystery.
 
2012-11-22 06:20:06 PM  

oh_please: Zulgaines: wildcardjack: I don't know why we insist on turkey. Wouldn't it b easier to roast four chickens.

Honey baked ham is your God.

Yeah, but then you miss the best part of Thanksgiving...leftover turkey sammiches. I swear, they taste 10x better than the actual dinner. But you have to put stuffing and Ruffles in the sammich.

/we do honey baked ham for Xmas


You put ruffles in your sandwiches? BLASPHEMER!

Stuffing, yes. I love me some turkey bone soup and turkey sammiches.
 
2012-11-22 06:21:08 PM  

teto85: How many was President Bartlett in on?


There you go.

The turkey expert of "Fargo."
 
2012-11-22 06:35:42 PM  

Churchy LaFemme: [i47.tinypic.com image 458x299]


And that is why I loved that election cycle. It was full of crap like that.
 
2012-11-22 06:37:49 PM  

ChromoSomes: oh-please: Yeah, but then you miss the best part of Thanksgiving...leftover turkey sammiches. I swear, they taste 10x better than the actual dinner. But you have to put stuffing and Ruffles in the sammich.

I'm with ya on the leftover turkey sammiches but I often detect a slight change in the flavor of the turkey after it has been refrigerated (same with leftover mashed potatoes). I've always described it as a "refrigerator taste" (container air tight; nothing wrong with the operation of the fridge - temp OK; no odors inside, etc.). Although I'm not a chemist/biologist/scientist, I've always attributed it to some sort of enzyme activity. Any Farkers please feel free to comment to help me solve this mystery.


sobering up?
 
2012-11-22 06:52:09 PM  

ChromoSomes: oh-please: Yeah, but then you miss the best part of Thanksgiving...leftover turkey sammiches. I swear, they taste 10x better than the actual dinner. But you have to put stuffing and Ruffles in the sammich.

I'm with ya on the leftover turkey sammiches but I often detect a slight change in the flavor of the turkey after it has been refrigerated (same with leftover mashed potatoes). I've always described it as a "refrigerator taste" (container air tight; nothing wrong with the operation of the fridge - temp OK; no odors inside, etc.). Although I'm not a chemist/biologist/scientist, I've always attributed it to some sort of enzyme activity. Any Farkers please feel free to comment to help me solve this mystery.


exposure to air - even the tiny amount in the air-tight container - reacts with the meat causing some changes. Minor though.

Avoid this by either removing air, or just filling the container with a lot of product. Don't use a big container when a small one will do.
 
2012-11-22 07:02:23 PM  
No, turkeys cannot fly.
 
2012-11-22 07:03:04 PM  
FTA: 4-5 -- The number of months it takes for a newborn turkey to reach maturity.

Turkey's are born now? Evolution, mutation, or genetic tinkering?
 
2012-11-22 07:06:14 PM  
They missed number 47 in the list of random numbers
 
2012-11-22 07:15:35 PM  
Subfail,

The number of calls the Butterball Turkey Talk-Line was braced for Thanksgiving morning 2011

And no where did the article say anything about the content, or was even related to the phone calls. Headline is bad and subby should feel bad for submitting it and the mod should feel bad for green lighting it.
 
2012-11-22 07:23:25 PM  
Turkey is like pot roast or beef stew. Something magic happens overnight to make them taste even better the next day.

I suspect it's the fatty chains in lipids getting a chance to regroup, and thicken the gravy.
 
2012-11-22 07:28:57 PM  
"Butterball Help Line."

"Uh ... what's your turkey wearing ...?"

click
 
2012-11-22 07:55:55 PM  

JeffMD: Subfail,

The number of calls the Butterball Turkey Talk-Line was braced for Thanksgiving morning 2011

And no where did the article say anything about the content, or was even related to the phone calls. Headline is bad and subby should feel bad for submitting it and the mod should feel bad for green lighting it.


Perhaps you weren't around for yesterday's thread about trying to prank call them with all sorts of inane questions. Fun was had by most, except for a couple of knickertwisted farks like you :)
 
2012-11-22 08:18:40 PM  
Fark that, anyone who prank calls people working on thanksgiving are a bunch of thankless arseholes.
 
2012-11-22 08:22:47 PM  
I called and asked them if it was ok to fark the turkey then cook it and serve it to my guests. They hung up on me. WTF is wrong with people. so rude.
 
2012-11-22 08:37:20 PM  
I ran the self clean cycle on our oven this morning because it was a mess after a foil failure. The auto lock feature didn't auto unlock after and our Thanksgiving plan have been pretty much farked as a result.
 
2012-11-22 08:53:56 PM  

DittoToo: I ran the self clean cycle on our oven this morning because it was a mess after a foil failure. The auto lock feature didn't auto unlock after and our Thanksgiving plan have been pretty much farked as a result.


Order pizza. That is the standing rule in our house. If dinner (regardless of the occasion) fails, then we are dining on Italian.
 
2012-11-22 09:05:04 PM  

kiwimoogle84: oh_please: Zulgaines: wildcardjack: I don't know why we insist on turkey. Wouldn't it b easier to roast four chickens.

Honey baked ham is your God.

Yeah, but then you miss the best part of Thanksgiving...leftover turkey sammiches. I swear, they taste 10x better than the actual dinner. But you have to put stuffing and Ruffles in the sammich.

/we do honey baked ham for Xmas

You put ruffles in your sandwiches? BLASPHEMER!

Stuffing, yes. I love me some turkey bone soup and turkey sammiches.


Absolutely, the ruffles give it just the right crunch. I'm with you on the turkey bone soup though.

Evil Twin Skippy: Turkey is like pot roast or beef stew. Something magic happens overnight to make them taste even better the next day.


This.
 
2012-11-22 09:34:01 PM  

ChromoSomes: Anybody know the % wastage to a turkey after cooking?


If you do it right, just the bones
Turkey, turkey sammich, Turkey casserole, turkey soup. If you have anything but bones after 3 weeks, you're doing it wrong and wasting food.
 
2012-11-22 09:45:52 PM  
The comments are better than the article. Looks kinda like a fark politics discussion.
 
2012-11-23 12:38:30 AM  

Yogimus: Churchy LaFemme: [i47.tinypic.com image 458x299]

And that is why I loved that election cycle. It was full of crap like that.


Give it four years. All that will remain of election 2012 will be the lulz and a bitter moron that refuses to just go away, just like what's left of '08 at this point.
 
2012-11-23 01:52:48 AM  

that bosnian sniper: I almost had to call the hotline today to make sure I knew how many hours you had to cook a 20-pound possum to make sure it was cooked all the way through, but he wouldn't stay in the pot.


You don't cook based off of time. You grab your meat thermometer and jab the probe into its still beating heart. Cook to an internal temp of 160F/72C.
 
2012-11-23 10:46:46 AM  

Huck And Molly Ziegler: teto85: How many was President Bartlett in on?

There you go.

The turkey expert of "Fargo."


He also did radio commercials for... products.

/That was excellent! We should do that once a week.
 
2012-11-25 07:13:21 AM  

Evil Twin Skippy: Turkey is like pot roast or beef stew. Something magic happens overnight to make them taste even better the next day.


I would swear this happens to pasta in tomato sauce too.
 
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