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(NYPost)   According to new survey, more Americans would rather have Thanksgiving dinner with Tim Tebow than Big Bird or Lady Gaga. Oh and Mr. President, maybe next year   (nypost.com) divider line 143
    More: Amusing, Big Bird, Tim Tebow, Lady Gaga, Thanksgiving, Americans, Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade, Thanksgiving dinner  
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2444 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Nov 2012 at 2:38 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-11-21 04:15:06 PM  

CygnusDarius: I'd rather have Henry Rollins, Ted Nugent, Michelle Maddow, and S.E Cupp in my tablebed.

Should Would be fun.


FTFY
 
2012-11-21 04:45:05 PM  
Well, of course they want Big Bird for Thanksgiving dinner . . .

vinelifedt.files.wordpress.com



/ obvious
 
2012-11-21 04:48:13 PM  
Yes, because if there is one thing I've learned in the past year, believe NY Post polls.
 
2012-11-21 04:55:07 PM  

Smelly Pirate Hooker: Yeah, I always figured about 25% of Americans were complete idiots, so this doesn't surprise me.


Ah yes, the "one-in-five (or close enough) Americans" rule.

20-25% of Americans:
- Can't find US on a map.
- Think the world is flat.
- Approved of President Bush in 2008.
- Think the sun revolves around Earth
- Would invite Tim Tebow over for Thanksgiving.

etc.
 
2012-11-21 05:02:44 PM  
whofarkingcares.jpg
 
2012-11-21 05:06:02 PM  

machoprogrammer: exick: Thanksgiving with Tebow would be nigh intolerable. I barely have room in my heart for the annoyance at the 10-second hypocritical sham of a prayer I already endure from my family before Thanksgiving dinner.

Eh, at least it seems Tebow practices what he preaches. I mean, you gotta respect the man off the field.

I never got the Tebow-hate (other than the fact he is a sub-par QB). The guy seems like a class act off the field.


As a reformed Tebow hater, let me shed some light.

Short Answer: ESPN.
Long Answer: The sports media industry that has realized human interest stories draw more ratings than competent play.

I watch way too much ESPN and I've finally got it through my skull that the best ratings potential are discussions on bad teams from major markets and QB controversies.

The Cowboys, Redskins, Eagles, and now Bears get a lot of chatter for being major market teams with issues. Nobody talks about he endless dumpster fire that is Cleveland, Cincinnati, KC, or Jacksonville. They're too small to get the eyeballs.

Similarly, there isn't much talk about competent major market teams. The only Falcons controversy is "can they win in the playoffs". And I can't tell you anything about the Texans. They have no glaring storylines so there's nothing to talk about.

The Jets have it all. A lousy major market team, primadonna players, a loudmouth head coach, and a QB controversy. It's the perfect soap opera.

Meanwhile, I hear that Manning fellow is doing alright in Denver.

On the plus side, this is great for Tim's after football career. He'll have oodles of casual fans and persecuted Christians to feel a kinship for a guy who "never got a fair shake" after those wins last year. If only coaches had seen the wisdom of Skip Bayless and put him in the game. He'll probably do good things helping people in Burma. Hopefully he brings more food than Bibles, but he probably can get more people to care about global poverty, which is nice.

Sincerely,
Reformed Tebow Hater

PS. Bite me Skip Bayless
 
2012-11-21 05:16:14 PM  
I'd rather have Thanksgiving Dinner with Joe Walsh*. You know he'd be fun ;)

i49.tinypic.com

* Favorite Joe quote: "It's really ... HARD ... to meditate ... on amphetamines."
 
2012-11-21 05:20:48 PM  
- 64% of men said they were most looking forward to watching football on TV, with 43% of women preferring the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade.

Does this sentence give anyone else a headache? Even as far as BS statistics goes, it's just awkward. Too many variables, not enough data points.

Was the whole thing multiple choice or something? If you walked up to a random American and asked them who they'd like to have to Thanksgiving, I doubt an appreciable number would come up with "Big Bird" on their own. Not even the kids; the kids would say Elmo.

I can't even think of one celebrity who I'd want to invite to Thanksgiving. Best I can come up with is Jack Black because the off chance he might regale us with a rock opera about how the brave dinner met its noble end whilst taking part in a turkey uprising against the tyranny of the farmer.
 
2012-11-21 05:32:17 PM  
Those are some pretty shiatty choices if you ask me.
 
2012-11-21 05:38:37 PM  
I'd like to get both George W. Bush and Mitt Romney together at the table. You know that conversation would be farking glorious.

W: "Ya see, Mittens it's like-"

MITT: "Don't farking call me 'mittens'"

W: "No, really, I mean, it's like the whole world hates me, ya know? And I still got myself elected. Twice. Not that hard, ya know?"

MITT: "Shut up. Just shut the hell up and pass the gravy."
 
2012-11-21 05:47:33 PM  
Came for the Tebow hate. Not leaving disappointed. Personally, I'll take Tebow sitting at the table, and a Big Bird on the table. I'm sure Tebow would be thankful, but probably less so if he had to spend the day around me, because I am not as gracious a man as he is.
 
2012-11-21 05:48:21 PM  

Xenomech: CygnusDarius: I'd rather have Henry Rollins, Ted Nugent, Michelle Maddow, and S.E Cupp in my tablebed.

Should Would be fun.

FTFY


Yeah, she's hot, but the moment she starts blathering conservative talking points, it would kill my boner.
 
2012-11-21 05:55:46 PM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: I plan to have a Big Bird over for dinner tomorrow

/Tebow can suck it


Don't think your gonna have too much luck with Tebow but I understand Elmo may be open to this idea .
 
2012-11-21 05:56:50 PM  
Tebow would try to pass the gravy, but he would get intercepted
 
2012-11-21 06:05:04 PM  
I'd like to have Tebow over mainly hoping he'd go off on all the arm-chair quarterbacks who nit pick on every single play during football games. It is amusing the guy saying 'come on * should of caught that' or 'that was a horrible pass * was open'; would be bent over and gasping for air after running 20 yards, can't throw a pass to a stationary at 30 yards, and would be crying like a baby if someone knocked them over.

Obama would be too much of a hassle because of security. Do you really want your house searched for weeks in advance and your food sent through an FBI level lab? If it was at the White House it would just be a publicity stunt and you could never relax, especially after the cavity search during the security check.
 
2012-11-21 06:16:38 PM  

CygnusDarius: I'd rather have Henry Rollins, Ted Nugent, Michelle Maddow, and S.E Cupp in my table.

Should be fun.


IN your table?

Who are you, Dr. Frank N. Furter?
 
2012-11-21 06:29:40 PM  

Lt_Ryan: I'd like to have Tebow over mainly hoping he'd go off on all the arm-chair quarterbacks who nit pick on every single play during football games. It is amusing the guy saying 'come on * should of caught that' or 'that was a horrible pass * was open'; would be bent over and gasping for air after running 20 yards, can't throw a pass to a stationary at 30 yards, and would be crying like a baby if someone knocked them over.


You do realize that you're talking about every head coach, GM, and scout in the league.

Another reason people don't like Tebow: his strong support among the meathead community.
 
2012-11-21 06:33:49 PM  
Deceased family members for me. The amount of eastern european food and alcohol was always a plus. You know you've drank enough when the recycle guys looks at the bottles yells out damnnn and gives you a thumbs up.
/
 
2012-11-21 07:16:38 PM  

CygnusDarius: Xenomech: CygnusDarius: I'd rather have Henry Rollins, Ted Nugent, Michelle Maddow, and S.E Cupp in my tablebed.

Should Would be fun.

FTFY

Yeah, she's hot, but the moment she starts blathering conservative talking points, it would kill my boner.


Hence the ball gag.
 
2012-11-21 07:16:54 PM  
My Zombie Guest list...

Richard Feynman
Frank Zappa
Jim Henson

Just a feeling that the breadth of conversation would be amazing.
 
2012-11-21 07:18:27 PM  
The Great ReReligioning of America is coming...
 
2012-11-21 07:27:49 PM  

cryinoutloud: Shee-it. I'd rather have George Bush over for Thanksgiving than some sports star. It's bound to be more interesting.


Just don't let him vomit all over you.
 
2012-11-21 07:29:20 PM  
As a person who is planning on having Thanksgiving dinner a couple of porn stars, I'm getting a kick ...
 
2012-11-21 07:29:27 PM  
Devout Christian here. I'd enjoy Christopher Hitchens for company on Thanksgiving. I didn't always agree with him but the man had a beautiful mind.
 
2012-11-21 07:35:52 PM  
I'd enjoy dinner with Larry David.
 
2012-11-21 07:40:33 PM  

MechaDupek: Devout Christian here. I'd enjoy Christopher Hitchens for company on Thanksgiving. I didn't always agree with him but the man had a beautiful mind.


I gotta believe you'd dominate the conversation.
 
2012-11-21 07:48:41 PM  
I don't understand this... I would really enjoy having dinner with the President, just think of all the amazing questions you could finally ask him? Even if you despised his policies, it'd still be incredible to grill him on them.

Inversely, wtf are you going to talk to Tim Tebow about? Football? The Bible? I can do that with any of my family members...
 
2012-11-21 07:51:56 PM  

tuvaorbust: My Zombie Guest list...

Richard Feynman
Frank Zappa
Jim Henson

Just a feeling that the breadth of conversation would be amazing.


"Whoa, that sounded awesome. Let me go get my bongos; we can jam."
 
2012-11-21 08:12:58 PM  

Your_Midnight_Man: CygnusDarius: Xenomech: CygnusDarius: I'd rather have Henry Rollins, Ted Nugent, Michelle Maddow, and S.E Cupp in my tablebed.

Should Would be fun.

FTFY

Yeah, she's hot, but the moment she starts blathering conservative talking points, it would kill my boner.

Hence the ball gag.


Everytime I hear/read 'ball gag', I think of three things '42 lbs box' 'bring in the gimp' and 'katana'.

:(.
 
2012-11-21 08:33:38 PM  

SpinStopper: I'd rather have Thanksgiving Dinner with Joe Walsh*. You know he'd be fun ;)

[i49.tinypic.com image 400x386]

* Favorite Joe quote: "It's really ... HARD ... to meditate ... on amphetamines."


Here's an idea: Joe Walsh the musician and Joe Walsh the politician in the same room.....
 
2012-11-21 09:07:56 PM  

CygnusDarius: Your_Midnight_Man: CygnusDarius: Xenomech: CygnusDarius: I'd rather have Henry Rollins, Ted Nugent, Michelle Maddow, and S.E Cupp in my tablebed.

Should Would be fun.

FTFY

Yeah, she's hot, but the moment she starts blathering conservative talking points, it would kill my boner.

Hence the ball gag.

Everytime I hear/read 'ball gag', I think of three things '42 lbs box' 'bring in the gimp' and 'katana'.

:(.

To violence

 
2012-11-21 09:42:25 PM  
Would Big Bird be a guest or the main course?
 
2012-11-21 09:43:37 PM  
Well I would be a lot don't want to go through the trouble of making everything Halal compliant, hence not wanting Obama.
 
2012-11-21 10:44:55 PM  

Bucky Katt: Would Big Bird be a guest or the main course?


Have hors d'oeuvres with the Bird, and then "invite" him out back.
 
2012-11-21 11:37:44 PM  
Well, I find Christians and athletes usually to be utter bores, so I'll go with Gaga.

Maybe she'd whip out her clenis for dessert. Always an ice-breaker, that.

/a little song, a little dance, a little clenis in your pants.
 
Oak
2012-11-21 11:47:48 PM  
Caroll Spinney, and it's not even close.

"Any living human" question? Not giving it a lot of thought, I'm thinking Chris Rock.

"Any human, living or dead?" Again, without reflecting a whole lot, I'm thinking Mark Twain.
 
2012-11-22 01:22:51 AM  

Oak: Caroll Spinney, and it's not even close.

"Any living human" question? Not giving it a lot of thought, I'm thinking Chris Rock.

"Any human, living or dead?" Again, without reflecting a whole lot, I'm thinking Mark Twain.


Jesus. Just to settle the whole thing.
 
2012-11-22 02:29:18 AM  
Tim Tebow would be entertaining to have. We would make horrible jokes about his QB ability and he would turn the other cheek. I am sure it would be a great time. The downside is that he would probably eat most of the Turkey. Rejected.

President Obama: Fascinating person and it would also be funny to give him a hard time about his politics, or at least try some impersonations. If he leaves his security at home (or just has like one or two SS agents) then that's fine, but it would probably be really intrusive.

If I could pick anyone alive: Patrick Stewart
 
2012-11-22 02:37:26 AM  
Tebow has more talent than GaGa, and is probably far more interesting to talk to. The intricacies of the lesser NY football team is more fascinating than the ins and outs of auto-tune.

That said, Obama, hell, ANY of the living presidents are far more desirable to have at a Thanksgiving dinner.
 
2012-11-22 09:56:30 AM  
Personally I would rather have Bill Murray I get the feeling he would talk about all the hot gay action he got during the 80's.
 
2012-11-22 10:01:55 AM  

screwzloos: 64% of men said they were most looking forward to watching football on TV

Am I living in a different version of reality than the one this poll is from? Of all the people I've ever known, not that many even have televisions, let alone care about football. I certainly don't.

Maybe this was just a really terrible multiple choice question?


I'm guessing the had a slightly larger sample demographic.
 
2012-11-22 06:43:50 PM  

BSABSVR: This is an actual survey? Conducted by whom? The institute for potato questions?


No, the Institute for Stove-Top Stuffing Science.
 
2012-11-22 06:50:17 PM  
Henry Rollins. That's an idea.

I'd go with Big Bird out of the options that beat Obama. Lady Gaga would probably wear a pant suit made out of deep-fried turkey skin. Tempting, but it would upstage the meal. You never upstage the meal. It's Thanksgiving. Pull that shiat on Christmas or Easter, not Thanksgiving.
 
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