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(Uproxx)   Wait, what's that -- you haven't had your heart melted yet today? Oh, don't worry, Fiona Apple's here with a letter to her fans explaining that she's canceling a tour to be with her dying dog. That should do it   (uproxx.com) divider line 68
    More: Sad, Fiona Apple, Kleenex, dogs  
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3192 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 20 Nov 2012 at 5:02 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-11-20 05:06:02 PM
Just keep living this day like the next will never come...
 
2012-11-20 05:07:32 PM
Perhaps a little overwrought, but still it hits me deeply.
I've always been a fan of hers,
this note merely cements it.
 
2012-11-20 05:07:54 PM
Oh shiat is she using that excuse again? Probably dying from obstructed bowel after it ate her homework.

J/K
 
2012-11-20 05:08:08 PM
Dusty. Very dusty.
 
2012-11-20 05:10:42 PM
Need to cancel a tour? All you need is a good defense, and your fans will understand.
 
2012-11-20 05:12:36 PM
The letter is a bit emo-kiddish and over-the-top, but...yeah, that sucks.
 
2012-11-20 05:14:09 PM
So I am staying home, and I am listening to her snore and wheeze, and reveling in the swampiest, most awful breath that ever emanated from an angel.

Except that line. That line is good stuff.
 
2012-11-20 05:15:19 PM
So she's going to let the dog suffer for longer instead of being a good owner and having it put down without pain.
 
2012-11-20 05:15:28 PM
Fiona Apple is still touring? Well you learn something new every day.
 
2012-11-20 05:15:49 PM
This is how she describes her dog's impending death: "t will be the most beautiful, the most intense, the most enriching experience of life I've ever known."

Your suffering animal is not a personal epiphany machine; stop looking forward to how cool it will be for you when she dies and put an end to her agony, you pinhead.
 
2012-11-20 05:20:19 PM
She needs to call a vet to house and let her companion take the big sleep. It is the most loving thing you can do for a friend at the end.
 
2012-11-20 05:27:58 PM
Dogs are the only evidence I've found of Divinity in this Universe. Hold her close and ease her way onward. It's a tiny price to pay for what she has given you.

/hugging my dogs when I get home
 
2012-11-20 05:28:13 PM
i.qkme.me
 
2012-11-20 05:29:50 PM
Maybe she should get Sarah McLachlan to sing him to sleep. That'll definitely ratchet up the emotion.
 
2012-11-20 05:30:25 PM

Blues_X: [i.qkme.me image 360x268]


Dammit!
 
2012-11-20 05:31:05 PM
FTFA: She is a pitbull, and was found in Echo Park, with a rope around her neck, and bites all over her ears and face.
She was the one the dogfighters use to puff up the confidence of the contenders
.

Cool, I never knew that Fiona Apple found one of Michael Vick's dogs.
 
2012-11-20 05:35:50 PM
Now that's almost as creative an excuse for calling attention to a bombing tour as "My dog ate my homework!"

Maybe the dog was dying because it wanted bacon and she wasn't bringing it home from the tour?
 
2012-11-20 05:36:19 PM
Yeah, I like dogs more than most people.


/which is to say that I like dogs more than I like people.
 
2012-11-20 05:49:48 PM

Smeggy Smurf: So she's going to let the dog suffer for longer instead of being a good owner and having it put down without pain.


Yeah, this.

This chick is so self-involved that if the letter didn't give it away - called the dog her 'child', cried to it when she was 'heart broken' - then keeping the dog alive - and in pain - just so she doesn't have to part with it yet is the clincher.

Yeah, Fiona is quite the biatch/twit and not nearly as caring as she thinks she is.
 
2012-11-20 05:51:05 PM
Saw her do a show here in NYC last month. Great concert.

Poor puppy. Is it dusty in here?
 
2012-11-20 05:51:58 PM
Yeah, I like dogs more than most people.


/which is to say that I like dogs more than I like people.


Like I always say sometimes, people are my least favorite animal.
 
2012-11-20 05:59:54 PM

mark12A: Dogs are the only evidence I've found of Divinity in this Universe. Hold her close and ease her way onward. It's a tiny price to pay for what she has given you.

/hugging my dogs when I get home


Rats provide good evidence of it as well. For many of the same reasons.

I know all too well what she's going through, and I don't blame her in the slightest.
 
2012-11-20 06:10:32 PM
She's a criminal for letting that poor dog suffer.
 
2012-11-20 06:11:42 PM
I can relate.... No owner should have to outlive their pet.
 
2012-11-20 06:15:28 PM

T.rex: I can relate.... No owner should have to outlive their pet.

 

25.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-11-20 06:25:17 PM

Marisyana: She's a criminal for letting that poor dog suffer.


Yeah, total biatch
 
2012-11-20 06:31:36 PM
No one bought tickets. That is why the tour is cancelled.
 
2012-11-20 06:48:38 PM
Are we sure that's a letter to fans and not just the title of her next album?
 
2012-11-20 06:51:19 PM

Robert1966: This is how she describes her dog's impending death: "t will be the most beautiful, the most intense, the most enriching experience of life I've ever known."


Jesus Christ, she makes it sound like she has the nice hot bubble bath poured, the scented candles already lit, her own MP3 playlist set up on the iPod, and fresh batteries in the vibrator all ready for when the dog takes its last breath.
 
2012-11-20 06:52:47 PM

Smeggy Smurf: So she's going to let the dog suffer for longer instead of being a good owner and having it put down without pain.


Robert1966: Your suffering animal is not a personal epiphany machine; stop looking forward to how cool it will be for you when she dies and put an end to her agony, you pinhead.


douchebag/hater: This chick is so self-involved that if the letter didn't give it away - called the dog her 'child', cried to it when she was 'heart broken' - then keeping the dog alive - and in pain - just so she doesn't have to part with it yet is the clincher.

Yeah, Fiona is quite the biatch/twit and not nearly as caring as she thinks she is.


Marisyana: She's a criminal for letting that poor dog suffer.


LewDux: Yeah, total biatch


Addison's Disease is not always painful, and I'd be willing to bet money that none of you know Fiona Apple or her dog personally, so you have no clue if the animal is actually suffering or not, but good job jumping to conclusions, guys. You sure showed everyone just how much better you are than her!
 
2012-11-20 06:55:28 PM
So sad. Hang in there Fiona and doggy.
 
2012-11-20 06:58:23 PM
citythatbreeds.com

Just because there hasn't been enough depressing dog talk yet.

/Good on Fiona. She will wait for him.
 
2012-11-20 06:59:11 PM

AdolfOliverPanties: Are we sure that's a letter to fans and not just the title of her next album?


People will refer to it as "When the Dog..."
 
2012-11-20 07:01:02 PM

Carlo Spicy-Wiener: Smeggy Smurf: So she's going to let the dog suffer for longer instead of being a good owner and having it put down without pain.

Robert1966: Your suffering animal is not a personal epiphany machine; stop looking forward to how cool it will be for you when she dies and put an end to her agony, you pinhead.

douchebag/hater: This chick is so self-involved that if the letter didn't give it away - called the dog her 'child', cried to it when she was 'heart broken' - then keeping the dog alive - and in pain - just so she doesn't have to part with it yet is the clincher.

Yeah, Fiona is quite the biatch/twit and not nearly as caring as she thinks she is.

Marisyana: She's a criminal for letting that poor dog suffer.

LewDux: Yeah, total biatch

Addison's Disease is not always painful, and I'd be willing to bet money that none of you know Fiona Apple or her dog personally, so you have no clue if the animal is actually suffering or not, but good job jumping to conclusions, guys. You sure showed everyone just how much better you are than her!


Sorry, but we all read that two page wall of text - you don't get to write all the description, history, and predictions of the future and then claim that "nobody knows me". We read what she wrote, and we are reacting to what she wrote.
 
2012-11-20 07:01:42 PM

mark12A: Yeah, I like dogs more than most people.


/which is to say that I like dogs more than I like people.

Like I always say sometimes, people are my least favorite animal.


Based on some of the comments I've read so far in this thread I can see why.
 
2012-11-20 07:18:22 PM
I remember when Tori Amos cancelled a tour, half of her dogs were dying, the other half pregnant.
 
2012-11-20 07:26:13 PM
i.imgur.com
Emobama haz sad. :(
 
2012-11-20 07:27:20 PM

DrowningLessons: T.rex: I can relate.... No owner should have to outlive their pet. 

[25.media.tumblr.com image 466x750]


www.online-utility.org
♫ Bealocwealm hafath freone frecan forth onsended
giedd sculon singan glaomen sorgiende on Meduselde... ♫
 
2012-11-20 07:27:27 PM

Smeggy Smurf: So she's going to let the dog suffer for longer instead of being a good owner and having it put down without pain.


^THIS
 
2012-11-20 07:28:04 PM
Romney has lots of free time. He could watch it.
 
2012-11-20 07:28:33 PM
i25.photobucket.com
 
2012-11-20 07:28:34 PM

plushpuppy: Smeggy Smurf: So she's going to let the dog suffer for longer instead of being a good owner and having it put down without pain.

^THIS


This is why when my grandma was dying of brain cancer I shot her instead of letting her suffer for ~6 weeks
 
2012-11-20 07:29:56 PM

DontMakeMeComeBackThere: Sorry, but we all read that two page wall of text - you don't get to write all the description, history, and predictions of the future and then claim that "nobody knows me". We read what she wrote, and we are reacting to what she wrote.


And yet, I don't see anything in that two page wall of text indicating that the animal is suffering and in pain. You know you could try, as you put it, "reacting to what she wrote" and not assume that you know anything about the situation beyond what she wrote. Or, you could be like the rest of the self-righteous douche-patrol in here and be a dick about someone wanting to spend the last moments of a loved one's life with them.
 
2012-11-20 07:31:23 PM

whither_apophis: I remember when Tori Amos cancelled a tour, half of her dogs were dying, the other half pregnant.


www.wearysloth.com

Sees what you did there.
 
2012-11-20 07:33:48 PM

Smeggy Smurf: So she's going to let the dog suffer for longer instead of being a good owner and having it put down without pain.


Quality of life can only really be judged by those who have the decision in their hands. I've seen many dogs who to my eyes look like shiat, but they are still eating, still wagging their tails, and still happy to be alive. IOW, you don't get to judge when the time is right.
 
2012-11-20 07:40:27 PM
Why is it that if you don't put down your terminally ill dog you are a monster, but if you do put down your terminally ill grandparent, you are also a monster?
 
2012-11-20 07:50:26 PM
I hope every Farker who is upset with Fiona for not putting her dog to sleep realizes that animals at least have that choice.

Are you going to be there for your family members when it's time for them to pass away? Can you expect any of them to be there for you when it's your time? You sure as hell aren't going to be able to just put them to sleep and wash your hands of it all.
 
2012-11-20 07:52:24 PM

The My Little Pony Killer: I hope every Farker who is upset with Fiona for not putting her dog to sleep realizes that animals at least have that choice.

Are you going to be there for your family members when it's time for them to pass away? Can you expect any of them to be there for you when it's your time? You sure as hell aren't going to be able to just put them to sleep and wash your hands of it all.


By your username I'm guessing you have some experience in these matters.
 
2012-11-20 07:53:03 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: The My Little Pony Killer: I hope every Farker who is upset with Fiona for not putting her dog to sleep realizes that animals at least have that choice.

Are you going to be there for your family members when it's time for them to pass away? Can you expect any of them to be there for you when it's your time? You sure as hell aren't going to be able to just put them to sleep and wash your hands of it all.

By your username I'm guessing you have some experience in these matters.


Yes, because My Little Ponies are people and not plastic figurines marketed towards little girls.
 
2012-11-20 07:54:46 PM

The My Little Pony Killer: Are you going to be there for your family members when it's time for them to pass away?


Probably, although I might be on tour.
 
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