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(Slate)   So is it OK to divorce a spouse who changes gender if you give it a shot and find you're just not into that?   (slate.com) divider line 357
    More: Interesting, Prudi, genders, Ex-wife  
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17529 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Nov 2012 at 3:33 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-11-20 02:58:48 PM
As I noted in the other thread, she lasted 89 days longer than most people would have, so I'll say yes. You can't say she didn't try.
 
2012-11-20 03:00:48 PM
Seems legit.
 
2012-11-20 03:04:36 PM
Sure. But she probably should have mentioned that she was transgendered before she got married
 
2012-11-20 03:30:06 PM
Absolutely. He's not a she. Stop pretending.
 
2012-11-20 03:34:56 PM
Two Words:


strap on

/thread over.
//That'll be $100 please
 
2012-11-20 03:37:17 PM
Yes, obviously.

The cousin letter is amusingly whacked...
 
2012-11-20 03:38:01 PM
According to several people who have posted in these types of threads, she is nothing more than a huge bigot.
 
2012-11-20 03:38:02 PM
Happened to someone I used to work with. They had a wife and a baby that was less than a year old, had the "I want to be a woman" talk with their wife and ended up getting divorced.
 
2012-11-20 03:38:17 PM
It's a touch different than, say, putting on a few pounds after having a kid.
 
2012-11-20 03:38:52 PM
I'm going to go out on a limb and go yep. If the story is legit it sounds like the gal has to save herself ... every man for themselves if you wish.
 
2012-11-20 03:40:36 PM
What effete, self-absorbed douchebags these people are.
 
2012-11-20 03:41:00 PM
Yes.
 
2012-11-20 03:41:29 PM
I have this weird feeling that people have gotten divorced for less than that
 
2012-11-20 03:41:40 PM
images.wikia.com
 
2012-11-20 03:41:43 PM
If they were declared "man and wife", and he legally became a woman, the contract has been breached and it's ok to bail.

You might still love the person, but that's not what was signed up for as far as the union goes.
 
2012-11-20 03:42:34 PM

ChipNASA: Two Words:


strap on

/thread over.
//That'll be $100 please


Hold back those tears and man up!
 
2012-11-20 03:42:38 PM
Tat'dGreaser: I have this weird feeling that people have gotten divorced for less than that

THIS
 
2012-11-20 03:42:59 PM
I think Prudence's letters are made up, but I wholly agree with her on this. I would think that a married transgendered person would first have to accept that their marriage is and should be over. They need to get past this before starting the transition. It isn't fair or reasonable to ask a woman to remain married to a man who will soon be a woman.
 
2012-11-20 03:42:59 PM
"I want to be a woman."

"Well, I don't want to be a lesbian."

"..."
 
2012-11-20 03:43:08 PM
I'll go ahead and stick to my "dont marry an insane person in the first place" policy.
 
2012-11-20 03:43:50 PM
I don't think people should be even allowed to cut off or mutilate their junk anymore than they should be allowed to cut off or mutilate their arm or leg. The technology just isn't there yet.

/ don't know if this dude actually did that...
// just sayin...
 
2012-11-20 03:44:32 PM

HotWingConspiracy: If they were declared "man and wife", and he legally became a woman, the contract has been breached and it's ok to bail.

You might still love the person, but that's not what was signed up for as far as the union goes.


Dr. Crusher understands.
 
2012-11-20 03:44:45 PM

FarkinHostile: According to several people who have posted in these types of threads, none of whom I will name, and none of whom will show up arguing the same and/or admitting to taking the position in the past - but they're totally real, you don't know them, they're from Canada - she is nothing more than a huge bigot.


Fixed.
 
2012-11-20 03:45:00 PM

Headso: I don't think people should be even allowed to cut off or mutilate their junk anymore than they should be allowed to cut off or mutilate their arm or leg. The technology just isn't there yet.

/ don't know if this dude actually did that...
// just sayin...


It's their body, not yours
 
2012-11-20 03:45:26 PM
I don't think that's something that just comes to your mind out of nowhere... The husband is an farkwad for wasting this woman's life...

\\nothing against LGBT's, can't stand people that waste other peoples time just because they want to be something that they are not.
 
2012-11-20 03:45:39 PM
It would strike me as odd if they DIDN'T get divorced. Isn't this very much like telling your spouse, "Oops, got my sexual orientation wrong."? How could anyone be expected to stick around. This lady was a trooper and hats off to her for giving it a shot, but c'mon, the person she married is not the person she's gonna end up with if she stays. If anything, she has a right to be pissed that the husband got married in the first place. You're supposed to be more honest than that with your partner. Everyone hides some things in a marriage, but "I want a coont" is kind of one you can't dance around.
 
2012-11-20 03:46:05 PM

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: I'll go ahead and stick to my "dont marry an insane person in the first place" policy.


so trans people are insane?
 
2012-11-20 03:46:26 PM
Dear Prudence,
Won't you come out to play?
The Beatles
 
2012-11-20 03:46:31 PM
Damn that "for worse" clause.
 
2012-11-20 03:46:50 PM
Happened to someone I know locally. The father became a mother over the summer break.
 
2012-11-20 03:46:51 PM
Hey, the wedding ceremony says "until death do us part", "until death do us part", people! That's a sacred unbreakable contract before Man and God.

On the other hand, it teaches us the importance of a good pre-nuptual contract. You can cover your ass for a lot of this stuff if you get it in writing.

Clause 13. In the event that either partner shall change sex during the marriage without full consent and agreement of the other partner, the marriage shall be considered to be dissolved in accordance with the law governing "unexpected penis" aka "unexpected woo-hoo". "Unexpected penis" is deemed to be grounds for mental cruelty and failure to perform the marital duties with regards to proceation and sexual satisfaction of the partner.

No, seriously. Look it up. You have a legal duty to do your duty by your spouse. And Saint Paul the Apostle (aka Saul of Tarsus) was very adamant on this point: the obligation is mutual. He was a liberal for his time, but this is now is quite orthodox jurisprudence in some denominations of Judaism, also. Sex is part of the bargain. YOU CAN BE HAULED INTO DIVORCE COURT FOR NOT HAVING SEX unless you belong to one of the whacky-tunes Protestant sects where women have no rights.
 
2012-11-20 03:47:34 PM
cdn.uproxx.com
 
2012-11-20 03:47:39 PM

SuperT: Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: I'll go ahead and stick to my "dont marry an insane person in the first place" policy.

so trans people are insane?


Well, they do have a recognized phychological disorder. So I'm gonna go with, "yeah, kinda."
 
2012-11-20 03:48:03 PM
I'd say it is ok even if you don't give it a shot.
 
2012-11-20 03:48:36 PM
I'll just leave this here.

NSFW
 
2012-11-20 03:48:46 PM

nutkick_42: SuperT: Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: I'll go ahead and stick to my "dont marry an insane person in the first place" policy.

so trans people are insane?

Well, they do have a recognized phsychological disorder. So I'm gonna go with, "yeah, kinda."


/Why is it that I mispell something every time I try to troll?
 
2012-11-20 03:48:54 PM
People who don't want to be married should not be married. The root cause doesn't matter; if you don't want to be married then don't be. People change. Situations change. It's old fashioned religious nonsense that says that you need to stay married for life.
 
2012-11-20 03:48:55 PM
Yup.

Seems like kind of a tradgedy, and dipped if I can figure out who if anyone is to blame, but yup.
 
2012-11-20 03:49:08 PM
If you fell in love with the 'wrong' gender, that's part of who and what you love. If they're not really that person, you can be their friend but I'd consider the romance part over pretty much.
 
2012-11-20 03:49:16 PM

philotech: I don't think that's something that just comes to your mind out of nowhere... The husband is an farkwad for wasting this woman's life...

\\nothing against LGBT's, can't stand people that waste other peoples time just because they want to be something that they are not.


I imagine this is something that would be not an easy decision to make. He probably tried to be normal, can't help falling in love with someone.
 
2012-11-20 03:49:18 PM
what an unbelievable catastrafark
 
2012-11-20 03:49:34 PM
Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: I'll go ahead and stick to my "dont marry an insane person in the first place" policy.

Thats a redundancy, anyone that wants to get hitched is insane
 
2012-11-20 03:49:53 PM
Q. ... he wants to become a woman-or, she has always felt like a woman trapped in a man's body, and if she doesn't begin transitioning, she will be emotionally crippled. Initially, I promised to remain married to her during her transition... To a certain extent, my love for my husband is rooted in his manhood. The more my husband transitions into becoming a woman, the less romantic love I feel for her. I just don't think I can remain her wife. I am heartbroken and feel as though I am a widow, which sounds so dramatic. My husband is emotionally fragile right now, because she's lost some important people to her because of her transition. Everyone commends me for supporting her and sticking with our marriage, so I feel like a fraud now too. She loves me so much; I cannot imagine how to tell her I want a divorce, that she has lost me because she is transgendered...

Classy.

A: ...But if your husband confesses to you he plans to start growing breasts, he has so materially changed the contract of your marriage that I completely understand that you feel the husband you knew has died. In a way, he has and is being reborn as someone new, and you are not obligated to stay in the marriage under those circumstances. People would not expect you to stay (and you probably wouldn't) if he said he realized he was gay, or he wanted to enter into a polygamous relationship. This feeling he is a woman trapped in a man's body is not a new discovery for him, and he withheld absolutely crucial information from you prior to your marriage. It's great that you still love him and want to be an emotional support for him...

Ass-y.
 
2012-11-20 03:50:17 PM

Theaetetus: FarkinHostile: According to several people who have posted in these types of threads, none of whom I will name, and none of whom will show up arguing the same and/or admitting to taking the position in the past - but they're totally real, you don't know them, they're from Canada - she is nothing more than a huge bigot.

Fixed.


Please, jackass. You are one of them, but calling out farkers not in the thread is against the FAQ, and you just basically admit to taking that position in a passive/aggressive way.

I've been called a bigot here for daring to hold the opinion that a man to woman TG is not a 100% real woman. You know, you were on those threads, and participated, so your little "but they're totally real, you don't know them, they're from Canada" is little more than a lie.
 
2012-11-20 03:50:27 PM

SuperT: Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: I'll go ahead and stick to my "dont marry an insane person in the first place" policy.

so trans people are insane?


Often, yes.
 
2012-11-20 03:50:42 PM
Yup.

25.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-11-20 03:50:45 PM

Tat'dGreaser: Headso: I don't think people should be even allowed to cut off or mutilate their junk anymore than they should be allowed to cut off or mutilate their arm or leg. The technology just isn't there yet.

/ don't know if this dude actually did that...
// just sayin...

It's their his her body, not yours


FIFY

all.your-base.org
 
2012-11-20 03:51:00 PM
Would it be a dick move to post this link in the IRC channel I'm in with someone that is in a similar situation?
 
2012-11-20 03:51:38 PM
seems like I could deal with it, as long as she didn't get a penis, or start growing hair all over, or get man hands, or get a manly voice...................on second thought maybe a divorce might be for the best
 
2012-11-20 03:52:07 PM

Tat'dGreaser: Headso: I don't think people should be even allowed to cut off or mutilate their junk anymore than they should be allowed to cut off or mutilate their arm or leg. The technology just isn't there yet.

/ don't know if this dude actually did that...
// just sayin...

It's their body, not yours


should people who feel compelled to do so be allowed to have their limbs removed surgically? It just seems like indulging someone in something that is dangerous to them and can't ever be reversed.
 
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