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(Journal News)   You would think that of all people, a tree trimmer with the name Branch would be good at his job   (lohud.com) divider line 60
    More: Fail, trimmers, reckless endangerment, Ramapo  
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4483 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Nov 2012 at 8:42 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



60 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-11-19 08:41:30 PM
If one were to go out on a limb...
 
2012-11-19 08:43:11 PM
Well, I'm stumped.
 
2012-11-19 08:44:42 PM
Branched out?
 
2012-11-19 08:44:48 PM
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Really guys?
 
2012-11-19 08:45:31 PM
Limb off?
 
2012-11-19 08:46:07 PM
Tree down.
 
2012-11-19 08:46:54 PM

Indubitably: Tree down.


Power's out indefinitely.
 
2012-11-19 08:47:12 PM
At about 12:30 p.m. Sunday, Branch was taking...


taking what? drugs, a ride downtown, a course in comparative literature of the 12th century.
 
2012-11-19 08:47:28 PM
No ground crew or rope work?


for shame.....
 
2012-11-19 08:47:59 PM
Ironic aptronym. That is a full $10 of vocabulary right there.
 
2012-11-19 08:48:25 PM

Giltric: No ground crew or rope work?


for shame.....


And crime...
 
2012-11-19 08:49:54 PM
That's pretty ironic.
 
2012-11-19 08:51:55 PM
When the accident happened he should have made like a tree, and got the fark out of there!
 
2012-11-19 08:52:20 PM
I love it when people have a name that matches their job. I talked to an electrical engineer with the last name Power today, and that amused me.

/if only his first name had been Max
 
2012-11-19 08:53:15 PM

Tickle Mittens: Ironic aptronym. That is a full $10 of vocabulary right there.


Ten bucks?

Sheet.

Sir, I've spent large larger, sir-squared.

To the tune of needing to teach everyone.

I just wish it paid something.

It doesn't.

And I'm not even doing it currently.

WTF?

MTF.

*)
 
2012-11-19 08:56:30 PM

CapeFearCadaver: Content Preview This content is exclusive for Newsday digital access and 7-day home delivery subscribers and Optimum Online® customers.
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Really guys?



I just got a popup saying 5 free views before you have to subscribe. I just closed the box and RTFA
 
2012-11-19 09:04:10 PM
guy i went to school with is a tree man. last time i saw him i was on the street and he was way the hell in a massive tree. he was like "hey Kritter what's up?" and i was like "you are, John!". He got a kick out of that.

/i have no life
 
2012-11-19 09:06:40 PM

KrispyKritter: guy i went to school with is a tree man. last time i saw him i was on the street and he was way the hell in a massive tree. he was like "hey Kritter what's up?" and i was like "you are, John!". He got a kick out of that.

/i have no life

To diss...


*)
 
2012-11-19 09:06:50 PM
I'll go out on a limb here and say I'm stumped as to why this fine soul didn't branch out and leaf the occupation of tree trimmer while he still had a chance of making the deciduous to be something else. His coniferous duty was rooted in making the cut. He, alas, did knot.
 
2012-11-19 09:07:50 PM

Indubitably: KrispyKritter: guy i went to school with is a tree man. last time i saw him i was on the street and he was way the hell in a massive tree. he was like "hey Kritter what's up?" and i was like "you are, John!". He got a kick out of that.

/i have no life

To diss...

*)


What is a fossil, anyway?
 
2012-11-19 09:13:17 PM
How about a hooker named Kochzucker, do you think she'd be good at her job?
/worst
//hummer
///evar.
 
2012-11-19 09:13:21 PM
"That's like an ice cream man named Cone!"
 
2012-11-19 09:13:39 PM

davidphogan: I love it when people have a name that matches their job. I talked to an electrical engineer with the last name Power today, and that amused me.

/if only his first name had been Max


You like Thai?
 
2012-11-19 09:16:23 PM
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-11-19 09:19:15 PM
I knew an underwriters with the name of Flood.
 
2012-11-19 09:20:02 PM
Names.
 
2012-11-19 09:22:19 PM
So his boss would be a Branch Manager?
 
2012-11-19 09:25:09 PM

ChromoSomes: So his boss would be a Branch Manager?


He wishes.
 
2012-11-19 09:25:59 PM
My dentist when I was a kid - Payne. He lived up to it. Fillings? Topical anesthesic only.
 
2012-11-19 09:26:39 PM

2xhelix: CapeFearCadaver: Content Preview This content is exclusive for Newsday digital access and 7-day home delivery subscribers and Optimum Online® customers.
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Really guys?


I just got a popup saying 5 free views before you have to subscribe. I just closed the box and RTFA


Maybe you (or somebody else with similar permissions) could copy/paste the rest of the article here for us?

And I vote -1 for the submittard.
 
2012-11-19 09:27:12 PM
So did anybody pony up the money so they could read the whole story?

Anybody?



Hello?
 
2012-11-19 09:29:30 PM
i.imgur.com
Agrees
 
2012-11-19 09:32:57 PM
Maybe he should have became an apprentice panel beater.

/Whatever that is
//Din't RTFA
 
2012-11-19 09:35:00 PM
Maybe if his name had been Cleaver or Feller or Notch? Why would anyone ever assume someone with the name of Branch would be good at cutting them off rather than growing out from them?
 
2012-11-19 09:40:13 PM
 
2012-11-19 09:52:57 PM
I never trusted those Birchers.
 
2012-11-19 09:55:20 PM
3.bp.blogspot.com

/Trees everywhere
//or something
 
2012-11-19 09:55:20 PM
One of the most dangerous jobs out there,
Drugs apparently mack it safer.
 
2012-11-19 09:56:35 PM
Branch wasn't meant to be an endorsement, it was a command. Like, "Branch out into a desk job- desks are made of wood! Why, you could cut costs and buzz through forests of paper to succeed! But don't do anything with trees or heavy machinery, you'll kill us all."
 
2012-11-19 09:57:19 PM

Badgers: [3.bp.blogspot.com image 300x400]

/Trees everywhere
//or something


I'm not sure how Vanessa Carlton figures into all this, but I like it!
 
2012-11-19 10:06:15 PM
Article stops after two paragraphs and asks for money. Hey, it works for drug dealers, right?

Fark you, subby.
 
2012-11-19 10:08:25 PM

Fark Rye For Many Whores: I never trusted those Birchers.


WHAR WORK PERMET

WH
 
2012-11-19 10:11:30 PM
This thread greened by Moddy McModminner, who is as perfectly good at his profession as his name suggests.

/really, isn't there something in the Posting Rules about paywall links?
 
2012-11-19 10:14:31 PM
Was his last name Davidian?

/actually know someone named David Davidian.
//TSB
 
2012-11-19 10:21:18 PM
Who could have possibly predicted that at a tree-trimming company, the guy named Branch would be cut loose?
 
2012-11-19 10:49:38 PM

fusillade762: davidphogan: I love it when people have a name that matches their job. I talked to an electrical engineer with the last name Power today, and that amused me.

/if only his first name had been Max

You like Thai?


Thai good. You like shirt?
 
2012-11-19 10:56:25 PM

davidphogan: I love it when people have a name that matches their job. I talked to an electrical engineer with the last name Power today, and that amused me.

/if only his first name had been Max


Was his name Evan by chance?
 
2012-11-19 10:57:17 PM

davidphogan: e a name that matches their job. I talked to an electrical engineer with the last name Power today, and that amused me.

/if only his first name had bee




images1.wikia.nocookie.net
Bookman?, the library investigator's name is Bookman?, come on. That's amazing, that's like an ice cream man named cone.
 
2012-11-19 10:59:06 PM
For those people that are running Notscript or something similar you have to allow newsday and pagesuite to get to the pop-up where you can use one of your 5 free views.

or ...

taking down the limb at 89 Orange Tpke., (Route 17), when it crashed into the roof of a vacant house on the property and slid onto the roadway, blocking the sidewalk and both southbound lanes and one northbound lane of Route 17, police said. It did not hit any vehicles or pedestrians, police added.
Branch had been hired by the home's owner to remove a backyard tree that had been leaning for years, but Branch didn't secure the limb and misjudged the direction it would fall, police said. His actions "created substantial risk of serious physical injury to others," police said.
The homeowner was not charged.
Branch is set to appear in Sloatsburg Village Court on Dec. 19. Further information on his court appearance or legal representation was unavailable Monday, and efforts to reach him were unsuccessful.
 
2012-11-19 11:07:59 PM
You would think that of all people a subby named dumbass would not submit a paysite article.
 
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