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(Stuff.co.nz)   Man drinks himself to death watching the latest "Twilight" movie. Why does our society continue to ignore obvious cries for help -- like adult men going to watch the latest "Twilight" movie?   (stuff.co.nz ) divider line 117
    More: Sad, Ian Smith, society, watch, drinks  
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9518 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Nov 2012 at 8:54 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



117 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-11-18 06:50:56 PM  
Faced with having to watch Twilight, I'd start drinking heavily too.
 
2012-11-18 07:19:11 PM  
I'm a theatre manager. We find a huge amount of liquor bottles in the Twilight showings.
 
2012-11-18 07:28:44 PM  

toddalmighty: I'm a theatre manager. We find a huge amount of liquor bottles in the Twilight showings.


You see that's interesting right there. To me at least. What kind of liquor, is it skewed toward something? And does this homeless guy sitting there seem to make sense to you in your experience? In that film in particular or do you think he was randomly at that one?

Man, I'd so sit and have a beer with you over this.
 
2012-11-18 07:55:22 PM  

Barfmaker: toddalmighty: I'm a theatre manager. We find a huge amount of liquor bottles in the Twilight showings.

You see that's interesting right there. To me at least. What kind of liquor, is it skewed toward something? And does this homeless guy sitting there seem to make sense to you in your experience? In that film in particular or do you think he was randomly at that one?

Man, I'd so sit and have a beer with you over this.


Peach schnapps and Zima.
 
2012-11-18 08:24:41 PM  
Glad to see them breaking the story 2 and a half years later
 
2012-11-18 08:25:51 PM  
If given the choice between drinking myself to death and watching the latest Twilight movie I would have to seriously consider my options.
 
2012-11-18 08:57:16 PM  
I have put down a liter of Jack in an evening before. I'm not saying it was a good evening, but I didn't die.
 
2012-11-18 08:58:03 PM  
That's just sad on so many levels.

The lowest of which is dying watching "Twilight."
 
2012-11-18 08:59:49 PM  
At 23 I tried drinking myself to death, too. Dunno how he managed it on a litre.
 
2012-11-18 09:00:15 PM  

toddalmighty: I'm a theatre manager. We find a huge amount of liquor bottles in the Twilight showings.


and vibrators?
 
2012-11-18 09:00:22 PM  
Sad story : \
 
2012-11-18 09:00:48 PM  

dalovindj: I have put down a liter of Jack in an evening before. I'm not saying it was a good evening, but I didn't die.


Something tells me that the bottle of Johnny Walker probably wasn't the first thing he drank that night.
 
2012-11-18 09:02:11 PM  
Red Label? Pretty classy for a homeless dude
 
2012-11-18 09:02:53 PM  
img388.imageshack.us
 
2012-11-18 09:04:14 PM  

Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: Barfmaker: toddalmighty: I'm a theatre manager. We find a huge amount of liquor bottles in the Twilight showings.

You see that's interesting right there. To me at least. What kind of liquor, is it skewed toward something? And does this homeless guy sitting there seem to make sense to you in your experience? In that film in particular or do you think he was randomly at that one?

Man, I'd so sit and have a beer with you over this.

Peach schnapps and Zima.


Vanilla Absolut and rootbeer
 
2012-11-18 09:04:15 PM  
Team Dead Hobo!
 
2012-11-18 09:05:40 PM  
The poster for that movie is hilarious. The three leads dressed fashionably, slowly jogging together. It's health class and they decided not to dress out. They'll do the whole mile, but they can't those clothes get sweaty because this is 1st period.
 
2012-11-18 09:06:11 PM  
FTFA A woman who sat behind Mr Smythe said she had seen him drink at least half a bottle of Johnny Walker Red Label whiskey straight before slumping forward in his seat and snoring.

amateur
 
2012-11-18 09:06:35 PM  
Hm...

I used to come here for fun and thought laughing at tragedy was a natural way to live...

Now I'm just sort of wondering how the fark this world keeps going when the most civilized of us can only cope with tragedy with laughter.

It's been educational...

/Drunk post
 
2012-11-18 09:06:43 PM  
Almost as sad and needless as the EOD soldier's demise a few threads down. Almost.
 
2012-11-18 09:07:15 PM  
That story seems off. Not even the Twilight part (as sad as that is), but a known alcoholic dying with a BAC of 0.57? And a Kiwi, aged 23? That just doesn't seem like a high enough level to kill a person who is a chronic drinker. We see levels that high frequently in alcoholics; unless it is a binge drinker they usually don't even suffer many effects-they just sleep it off and head back out for more. Strange story.
 
2012-11-18 09:10:19 PM  
Bah, this in no way can compare to the tragedy of SUPERSTORM Sandy that killed 100 people. The DEADLIEST storm in US history (Katrina killed 1800+)!!!!one!!wtf!!one!
 
2012-11-18 09:10:54 PM  
So two pints? I hate to speak ill of the dead but what a pussy.
 
2012-11-18 09:11:53 PM  

My wife says I have to take our daughter to the new twilight movie

battleroyalewithcheese.com

My advice to you is to start drinking heavily



/That's how these things happen
 
2012-11-18 09:12:10 PM  
Sounds like the end of an e. e. cummings story.
 
2012-11-18 09:13:23 PM  

Deedeemarz: That story seems off. Not even the Twilight part (as sad as that is), but a known alcoholic dying with a BAC of 0.57? And a Kiwi, aged 23? That just doesn't seem like a high enough level to kill a person who is a chronic drinker. We see levels that high frequently in alcoholics; unless it is a binge drinker they usually don't even suffer many effects-they just sleep it off and head back out for more. Strange story.


I thought so too. Maybe if he was homeless he was also not eating?
 
2012-11-18 09:13:42 PM  
i6.photobucket.com


It was a mercy killing.
 
2012-11-18 09:13:47 PM  

RealAmericanHero: Hm...

I used to come here for fun and thought laughing at tragedy was a natural way to live...

Now I'm just sort of wondering how the fark this world keeps going when the most civilized of us can only cope with tragedy with laughter.

It's been educational...

/Drunk post


It's safer and healthier than coping with tragedy using violence... or alcohol.
 
2012-11-18 09:13:58 PM  

Mugato: So two pints? I hate to speak ill of the dead but what a pussy.


I have this feeling he a) drank a whole lot more before he got there, and b) may well have consumed some prescription or OTC pharmaceuticals prior to the event.
 
2012-11-18 09:14:07 PM  

Deedeemarz: That story seems off. Not even the Twilight part (as sad as that is), but a known alcoholic dying with a BAC of 0.57? And a Kiwi, aged 23? That just doesn't seem like a high enough level to kill a person who is a chronic drinker. We see levels that high frequently in alcoholics; unless it is a binge drinker they usually don't even suffer many effects-they just sleep it off and head back out for more. Strange story.


Which might suggest that the alcohol was not entirely responsible for ending his life. The most reasonable conclusion is then that it was the movie which ultimately killed him.
 
2012-11-18 09:15:52 PM  

HotWingAgenda: It's safer and healthier than coping with tragedy using violence... or alcohol.


touché
 
2012-11-18 09:16:07 PM  

RealAmericanHero: I used to come here for fun and thought laughing at tragedy was a natural way to live...Now I'm just sort of wondering how the fark this world keeps going when the most civilized of us can only cope with tragedy with laughter.


What few details are in the article suggest a short and very unhappy life. Not even so easy to laugh. Not without changing the subject a bit.

Obligatory:

makemelaugh.com
 
2012-11-18 09:18:06 PM  

rappy: Red Label? Pretty classy for a homeless dude


He was also a thief.

So, if you're going to steal, why steal the cheap stuff?

---

Pretty weak drinker though. Any good alcoholic could have handled that easily.
 
2012-11-18 09:19:53 PM  

"Ambulance staff were called and police alerted after it was clear Mr Smythe was dead."


Well, he could be changing into a vampire so technically he would be the living undead dead. Was his last words, "Bite me, Bella!"?

 
2012-11-18 09:21:11 PM  

spawn73: rappy: Red Label? Pretty classy for a homeless dude

He was also a thief.

So, if you're going to steal, why steal the cheap stuff?



You make a good point, sir
 
2012-11-18 09:24:39 PM  

Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: Barfmaker: toddalmighty: I'm a theatre manager. We find a huge amount of liquor bottles in the Twilight showings.

You see that's interesting right there. To me at least. What kind of liquor, is it skewed toward something? And does this homeless guy sitting there seem to make sense to you in your experience? In that film in particular or do you think he was randomly at that one?

Man, I'd so sit and have a beer with you over this.

Peach schnapps and Zima.


Thats fine for the tweens in the audience, but the older lonely housewives prefer vodka and/or a box of wine.
 
2012-11-18 09:25:04 PM  
Maybe because he lives in his mothers bedrooms closets garage.
 
2012-11-18 09:27:25 PM  

Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: Zima.


Do you know how I know you're old?
 
2012-11-18 09:28:20 PM  

Gyrfalcon: That's just sad on so many levels.

The lowest of which is dying watching "Twilight."


As contrasted to living through it? I mean, honestly, if those are your only two remaining choices...
 
2012-11-18 09:30:25 PM  
what a horrible way to go... watching Twilight.

Every time someone watches a Twilight movie, somewhere, a book dies.
 
2012-11-18 09:33:15 PM  
Good grief, I went and saw it by myself. I made it thru the movie intact.
Unfortunately, the boomer chicks that were there weren't as hot as these.
And you only thought it was hotter when the stripper chicks cried.
img35.imageshack.us
 
2012-11-18 09:33:29 PM  

Medusa's Daughter: what a horrible way to go... watching Twilight.

Every time someone watches a Twilight movie, somewhere, a book dies.


It really sounds like awful torture
 
2012-11-18 09:33:58 PM  

vodka: Bah, this in no way can compare to the tragedy of SUPERSTORM Sandy that killed 100 people. The DEADLIEST storm in US history (Katrina killed 1800+)!!!!one!!wtf!!one!


What does this have to do with, like... anything at all?
 
2012-11-18 09:35:17 PM  
Maybe the guy wanted to die, but not alone. Sad in any event.
 
2012-11-18 09:37:10 PM  
23? Jesus f*ck that's young.

Well, bye.
 
2012-11-18 09:37:53 PM  

I Like Bread: Sounds like the end of an e. e. cummings story.


we authors know a hopeless case if - listen: even if it's gotta involve bad twilight fanfic, there's still a hell of a good universe next door; let's go
 
2012-11-18 09:38:42 PM  
I'm pretty sure I'd rather drown at a sewage treatment plant, but it's just a guess.

/knocks wood that neither happen
 
2012-11-18 09:39:38 PM  
new.assets.thequietus.com

Charlton Heston predicted we'd have Euthanasia Chambers.
 
2012-11-18 09:43:40 PM  
Given a choice between watching a Twilight movie or being eaten alive by ants, my answer would be:

"Butter me up and tie me white arse down on the ant hill boys but whatever you do, don't tie me kangaroo down".
.
 
2012-11-18 09:44:48 PM  

Gawdzila: vodka: Bah, this in no way can compare to the tragedy of SUPERSTORM Sandy that killed 100 people. The DEADLIEST storm in US history (Katrina killed 1800+)!!!!one!!wtf!!one!

What does this have to do with, like... anything at all?


His login?

RealAmericanHero: Now I'm just sort of wondering how the fark this world keeps going when the most civilized of us can only cope with tragedy with laughter.


Desensitization, shock combined with coping mechanism, "better to laugh than to cry". Take your pick. The world has always been brutal, and will continue to be brutal. The best we can hope for is a smile on occasion. Besides, it's Twilight, why so maudlin?
 
2012-11-18 09:45:23 PM  

Znuh: [new.assets.thequietus.com image 550x309]

Charlton Heston predicted we'd have Euthanasia Chambers.


Futurama predicted... 
media.tumblr.com 

The Charlton Heston chamber is kind of nice though. I wonder if that sunset was what he saw right before they pried the gun from his cold, dead hands.
 
2012-11-18 09:47:24 PM  
after sneaking into a screening of Twilight

Well, at least he didn't pay for a ticket. So there's a silver lining, however small.
 
2012-11-18 09:48:01 PM  
Sad that nobody thought it was strange when his snoring stopped and even more strange that nobody complained about his snoring to theatre staff.
 
2012-11-18 09:49:09 PM  
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-11-18 09:50:15 PM  

rooftop235: Znuh: [new.assets.thequietus.com image 550x309]

Charlton Heston predicted we'd have Euthanasia Chambers.

Futurama predicted... 
[media.tumblr.com image 285x233] 

The Charlton Heston chamber is kind of nice though. I wonder if that sunset was what he saw right before they pried the gun from his cold, dead hands.


Sadly, no. When Heston dies, he will see an empty chair....forever.
 
2012-11-18 09:51:42 PM  

Deedeemarz: That story seems off. Not even the Twilight part (as sad as that is), but a known alcoholic dying with a BAC of 0.57? And a Kiwi, aged 23? That just doesn't seem like a high enough level to kill a person who is a chronic drinker. We see levels that high frequently in alcoholics; unless it is a binge drinker they usually don't even suffer many effects-they just sleep it off and head back out for more. Strange story.


Oestrogen poisoning
 
2012-11-18 09:54:46 PM  

Deedeemarz: That story seems off. Not even the Twilight part (as sad as that is), but a known alcoholic dying with a BAC of 0.57? And a Kiwi, aged 23? That just doesn't seem like a high enough level to kill a person who is a chronic drinker. We see levels that high frequently in alcoholics; unless it is a binge drinker they usually don't even suffer many effects-they just sleep it off and head back out for more. Strange story.


Nah, .57% is in the range that COULD kill a heavy drinker, you're right with experience a drinker CAN handle it but over .50% is lethal for some people and chronic drinkers are not the healthiest of people, he might have seriously compromised his health in other ways that contributed to the death. I used one of those online BAC calculators to see where I was for the last 5 years of my drinking, I probably ran from about .40% - .50% for about 5 years straight and occasionally went overboard as evidenced by the occaisonal blackouts. Plus like a few people have said there might have been other drugs involved and why even check for them, he obviously died from either alcohol alone or the combination of drugs and alcohol they aren't going to waste a lot of time and money on checking him out. Yes it is sad and he is still a human but the cops are not really worried about us drunks and junkies so they'll just let it go.
 
2012-11-18 09:55:13 PM  
So what were the rules? One shot for every time the vampires sparkle?
 
2012-11-18 09:55:36 PM  
Man drinks himself to death watching the latest "Twilight" movie.

Well, who can blame him?
 
2012-11-18 10:03:16 PM  

FloydA: When Heston dies, he will see an empty chair....forever.


Guess all old people look the same to you?
 
2012-11-18 10:07:17 PM  
The CH Euthanasia Chamber is from Soylent Green - in the future, you get a nice final three minutes, then poof, then food for other people.

It's actually one of the best (and disturbing) scenes in the movie.
 
2012-11-18 10:07:18 PM  
she had seen him drink at least half a bottle of Johnny Walker Red Label whiskey straight

I'd rather drown in dog piss.
 
2012-11-18 10:10:27 PM  
Last time I pulled a stunt like that, I killed a liter of SoCo and split a case of Budweiser with my roomie while watching Good Will Hunting. But it was in our apartment, and the worst part was being woken up the next morning to go to work. By my hot car-pooling co-worker.
 
2012-11-18 10:28:50 PM  
They couldn't come up with a catchier title than "Twilight: Eclipse in Wellington"???
 
2012-11-18 10:30:03 PM  
I never liked the Twilight movies.
 
2012-11-18 10:33:26 PM  

Gordon Bennett: RealAmericanHero: I used to come here for fun and thought laughing at tragedy was a natural way to live...Now I'm just sort of wondering how the fark this world keeps going when the most civilized of us can only cope with tragedy with laughter.

What few details are in the article suggest a short and very unhappy life. Not even so easy to laugh. Not without changing the subject a bit.

Obligatory:

[makemelaugh.com image 600x420]


I hope that man doesn't have a Facebook
 
2012-11-18 10:37:46 PM  
The guy probably didn't know what he was getting into. He thought "Vampire" so he was waiting for things like Dracula and scary stuff. Upon seeing the homoerotic versions, he couldn't stop laughing and drowned in his own alcohol.
 
2012-11-18 10:38:16 PM  

toddalmighty: I'm a theatre manager. We find a huge amount of liquor bottles in the Twilight showings.


Goldschlager, right?
 
2012-11-18 10:38:40 PM  
Too much blood in his alcohol stream.
 
2012-11-18 10:45:36 PM  

belhade: By my hot car-pooling co-worker.


Did you fix her cable?
 
2012-11-18 10:49:23 PM  

Znuh: The CH Euthanasia Chamber is from Soylent Green - in the future, you get a nice final three minutes, then poof, then food for other people.

It's actually one of the best (and disturbing) scenes in the movie.


Yep. Edward G. Robinson dying and Charleston Heston's line.
 
2012-11-18 10:50:35 PM  
There's only one way to cope with this senseless tragedy - we have to copy a page from our efforts to save the children. Save the men from a disgust so thorough they are compelled to drink themselves to death! Ban Twilight, bringer of sin!
 
2012-11-18 10:52:35 PM  

toddalmighty: I'm a theatre manager. We find a huge amount of liquor bottles in the Twilight showings.


Years ago, when A Time to Kill was in theaters, a friend and I went on cheap night. The house was packed, not a seat left. Who sits behind me? A drunk old lady who decided to puke on the floor and everyone knows which way puke rolls in a theatre. Worst movie going experience ever. All her friend could hiss at her was, "Why didn't you leave?". Yes, puky old hag, why didn't you leave? The better question would be, why didn't I?
 
2012-11-18 10:58:12 PM  
Old news is so exciting?

Twilight: Eclipse

July 4 2010


Was something new added to the report or did the press decide to mention this again because of the new Twilight? I'm thinking the latter.
 
2012-11-18 10:59:47 PM  
SUBBY = STUPID

That is NOT the latest Twilight movie, thanks for the old news dumbass.

/And here people make fun of Twilight fans for being stupid
//Subby proved Twilight fans to be smarter than he/she is
 
2012-11-18 11:04:42 PM  

RealAmericanHero: I used to come here for fun and thought laughing at tragedy was a natural way to live...


If you don't learn how to laugh at life's horrors the only other remaining options are crying your eyes out or hardening your heart to inhuman levels.

None are truly good options, of course, but laughing is clearly the best.
 
2012-11-18 11:07:12 PM  

LtDarkstar: SUBBY = STUPID

That is NOT the latest Twilight movie, thanks for the old news dumbass.

/And here people make fun of Twilight fans for being stupid
//Subby proved Twilight fans to be smarter than he/she is


Twilight isn't the news here, Dumbass, a man died.

Wait, did you actually think knowing when each Twilight movie came out was gonna somehow make you look smart here?

OMG, you did. That's just adorable.
 
2012-11-18 11:11:32 PM  

quatchi: Wait, did you actually think knowing when each Twilight movie came out was gonna somehow make you look smart here?

OMG, you did. That's just adorable


Seriously, this. I don't want t live in a world where that is a qualification to be considered an intellectual.
 
2012-11-18 11:24:51 PM  

LovingTeacher: Deedeemarz: That story seems off. Not even the Twilight part (as sad as that is), but a known alcoholic dying with a BAC of 0.57? And a Kiwi, aged 23? That just doesn't seem like a high enough level to kill a person who is a chronic drinker. We see levels that high frequently in alcoholics; unless it is a binge drinker they usually don't even suffer many effects-they just sleep it off and head back out for more. Strange story.

Nah, .57% is in the range that COULD kill a heavy drinker, you're right with experience a drinker CAN handle it but over .50% is lethal for some people and chronic drinkers are not the healthiest of people, he might have seriously compromised his health in other ways that contributed to the death. I used one of those online BAC calculators to see where I was for the last 5 years of my drinking, I probably ran from about .40% - .50% for about 5 years straight and occasionally went overboard as evidenced by the occaisonal blackouts. Plus like a few people have said there might have been other drugs involved and why even check for them, he obviously died from either alcohol alone or the combination of drugs and alcohol they aren't going to waste a lot of time and money on checking him out. Yes it is sad and he is still a human but the cops are not really worried about us drunks and junkies so they'll just let it go.


Eh, YMMV, but I'm of the opinion that bad things tend to happen at a greater frequency when your the stuff your heart is pumping weighs is only 43% blood.
 
2012-11-18 11:32:08 PM  

quatchi: RealAmericanHero: I used to come here for fun and thought laughing at tragedy was a natural way to live...

If you don't learn how to laugh at life's horrors the only other remaining options are crying your eyes out or hardening your heart to inhuman levels.

None are truly good options, of course, but laughing is clearly the best.


Laughing in itself could be considered a form of hardening your heart. Lord knows it's how I survived until I was able to get away from my abusive husband. There is a certain satisfaction knowing that you are going to get the shiat beat out of you regardless of what you say, so you just take the lowest shot possible. Laughing in the face of imminent harm is not my claim to intelligence, either.

/face still hurts, two years later
 
2012-11-18 11:38:22 PM  

quatchi: If you don't learn how to laugh at life's horrors the only other remaining options are crying your eyes out or hardening your heart to inhuman levels.

None are truly good options, of course, but laughing is clearly the best.


A good answer in general? Maybe... a good answer on real, human terms which strive toward a solution? No...
 
2012-11-18 11:39:23 PM  
So, one more example to add to the Death by Despair trope file.
 
2012-11-18 11:43:02 PM  

Anastacya: quatchi: RealAmericanHero: I used to come here for fun and thought laughing at tragedy was a natural way to live...

If you don't learn how to laugh at life's horrors the only other remaining options are crying your eyes out or hardening your heart to inhuman levels.

None are truly good options, of course, but laughing is clearly the best.

Laughing in itself could be considered a form of hardening your heart. Lord knows it's how I survived until I was able to get away from my abusive husband. There is a certain satisfaction knowing that you are going to get the shiat beat out of you regardless of what you say, so you just take the lowest shot possible. Laughing in the face of imminent harm is not my claim to intelligence, either.

/face still hurts, two years later


You sound like a well-adjusted person.
 
2012-11-18 11:51:27 PM  

quatchi: LtDarkstar: SUBBY = STUPID

That is NOT the latest Twilight movie, thanks for the old news dumbass.

/And here people make fun of Twilight fans for being stupid
//Subby proved Twilight fans to be smarter than he/she is

Twilight isn't the news here, Dumbass, a man died.

Wait, did you actually think knowing when each Twilight movie came out was gonna somehow make you look smart here?

OMG, you did. That's just adorable.


What's more adorable is the stupid twat mods on here that think this 2 year old crap is actually news and the lemmings like yourself that actually sit around licking their boots. You must be a Packer fan as well? Ya, it's that easy to tell. Wake me up when some *NEW* news is posted on this site.
 
2012-11-18 11:51:51 PM  

RealAmericanHero: quatchi: If you don't learn how to laugh at life's horrors the only other remaining options are crying your eyes out or hardening your heart to inhuman levels.

None are truly good options, of course, but laughing is clearly the best.

A good answer in general? Maybe... a good answer on real, human terms which strive toward a solution? No...


Mourn the kid's addiction, misfortune and death.

But recognize that someone drank himself to death watching a Twilight movie. It doesn't matter who died, it's the means of death (drinking) and the connection to the movie that is morbidly funny.
 
2012-11-19 12:05:58 AM  
My girlfriend drug me to this movie this weekend.

I think it was worth sitting through 2 hours of mediocre film to see the scene where Dakota Fanning has her head forcibly ripped off, then lit on fire.

Am i a bad person?
 
2012-11-19 12:07:17 AM  

NewportBarGuy: 23? Jesus f*ck that's young.

Well, bye.


It was two years ago, so his body is now 25.
 
2012-11-19 12:18:28 AM  

rooftop235: Znuh: [new.assets.thequietus.com image 550x309]

Charlton Heston predicted we'd have Euthanasia Chambers.

Futurama predicted... 
[media.tumblr.com image 285x233] 

The Charlton Heston chamber is kind of nice though. I wonder if that sunset was what he saw right before they pried the gun from his cold, dead hands.


Wanna know how I know you didn't see the movie?

/bad troll Bad!
 
2012-11-19 12:21:10 AM  

Krieghund: Bashar and Asma's Infinite Playlist: Zima.

Do you know how I know you're old?


I was going to ask if Zima was still around. Guess not, huh?
 
2012-11-19 12:24:59 AM  

Anastacya: Laughing in itself could be considered a form of hardening your heart.


True enuff.

Lord knows it's how I survived until I was able to get away from my abusive husband. There is a certain satisfaction knowing that you are going to get the shiat beat out of you regardless of what you say, so you just take the lowest shot possible. Laughing in the face of imminent harm is not my claim to intelligence, either.

/face still hurts, two years later


Points well and painfully made.

Sad story, Sis.

Hope you are in a better place now.

I'm kind of a perpetual smartass, which I recognize as a coping mechanism for dealing with life's insanity. My smart mouth gets my dumb ass in more trouble than I could tell you about most days. It also gets me out of trouble. I like to joke sometimes that I spend half my time digging my own grave with my mouth and the other half backfilling the hole.

End of the day I still think it's better to be a smartass with a sense of humour than a dumbass without one. ^_^

Be Well.

/Humour does so have two Us.
 
2012-11-19 12:25:48 AM  
sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net
 
2012-11-19 12:32:11 AM  

LtDarkstar: What's more adorable is the stupid twat mods on here that think this 2 year old crap is actually news and the lemmings like yourself that actually sit around licking their boots.


It's not news, it's Fark.

You must be a Packer fan as well? Ya, it's that easy to tell.

Lions.

/BC Lions, that is.
 
2012-11-19 12:47:01 AM  
Drank himself to death from a liter? Pussy lightweight.
 
2012-11-19 12:53:42 AM  

RealAmericanHero: A good answer in general? Maybe... a good answer on real, human terms which strive toward a solution? No...


Humour is an initial reaction not a solution.

It's the emotional first responder so to speak.

Society *has* solutions in place for people like this 23 year old alcoholic man but as mentioned in the article he never availed himself of them and so he died stupidly and senselessly at a tragically young age.

The only reason we're even talking about him two years later here is because where he died is prime fodder for a snarky thread between "Team Twi-tard" and "Team GTFO of here with that shiat".

/Guess what side I'm on there.
 
2012-11-19 01:00:53 AM  

LtDarkstar: quatchi: LtDarkstar: SUBBY = STUPID

That is NOT the latest Twilight movie, thanks for the old news dumbass.

/And here people make fun of Twilight fans for being stupid
//Subby proved Twilight fans to be smarter than he/she is

Twilight isn't the news here, Dumbass, a man died.

Wait, did you actually think knowing when each Twilight movie came out was gonna somehow make you look smart here?

OMG, you did. That's just adorable.

What's more adorable is the stupid twat mods on here that think this 2 year old crap is actually news and the lemmings like yourself that actually sit around licking their boots. You must be a Packer fan as well? Ya, it's that easy to tell. Wake me up when some *NEW* news is posted on this site.


If you go to this site for actual news, well, that is just... adorable.

/only here for the occassional poop thread, cop-hate thread, and circumcision LOLathon thread.
 
2012-11-19 01:21:29 AM  
Didn't read all the comments. Went to see Skyfall this evening and couldn't find parking at a theater that is never that full. Felt sorry for all the boyfriends and dads leaving the theaters showing Twilight. Was otherwise glad to see the theater doing good business so it doesn't turn into a vacant dump.
 
2012-11-19 01:23:26 AM  

Mytch: Deedeemarz: That story seems off. Not even the Twilight part (as sad as that is), but a known alcoholic dying with a BAC of 0.57? And a Kiwi, aged 23? That just doesn't seem like a high enough level to kill a person who is a chronic drinker. We see levels that high frequently in alcoholics; unless it is a binge drinker they usually don't even suffer many effects-they just sleep it off and head back out for more. Strange story.

Which might suggest that the alcohol was not entirely responsible for ending his life. The most reasonable conclusion is then that it was the movie which ultimately killed him.


That is a great possibility--dies of sheer boredom....
 
2012-11-19 01:25:44 AM  
This story is 2 YEARS OLD
 
2012-11-19 01:26:28 AM  

mikewadestr: Given a choice between watching a Twilight movie or being eaten alive by ants, my answer would be:

"Butter me up and tie me white arse down on the ant hill boys but whatever you do, don't tie me kangaroo down".
.


Great. THAT'S the song I want stuck in my head tonite. Thanks so much.
 
2012-11-19 01:51:44 AM  
rappy:

Red Label? Pretty classy for a homeless dude

That stuff is swill. Black Grouse is much better.
 
2012-11-19 01:55:11 AM  

belhade: was being woken up the next morning to go to work. By my hot car-pooling co-worker.


t2.gstatic.com
 
2012-11-19 01:56:22 AM  

Znuh: [new.assets.thequietus.com image 550x309]

Charlton Heston predicted we'd have Euthanasia Chambers.


But THIS is the best we've done so far?

Maybe I should start drinking Johnny Walker Red then if it'll kill me quicker. But I'd rather watch something interesting during it, like paint growing or grass drying.
 
2012-11-19 02:07:02 AM  

HotWingAgenda: quatchi: Wait, did you actually think knowing when each Twilight movie came out was gonna somehow make you look smart here?

OMG, you did. That's just adorable

Seriously, this. I don't want t live in a world where that is a qualification to be considered an intellectual.


I'm an intellectual because I dropped out of 8th grade but I still know a lot. Except for science, math, getting along with people, contributing anything useful to the world around me... But I do know who the first non-Rashidun caliph was and my IQ is almost high enough for Mensa. Though it's rapidly diminishing because I drink too farking much.

Watching paint dry is hard work. You try it.
 
2012-11-19 02:10:48 AM  
quatchi:

I'm kind of a perpetual smartass, which I recognize as a coping mechanism for dealing with life's insanity.

I'm an insane asshole. Cope with that.
 
2012-11-19 02:18:35 AM  

The One True TheDavid: quatchi:

I'm kind of a perpetual smartass, which I recognize as a coping mechanism for dealing with life's insanity.

I'm an insane asshole. Cope with that.


I'll cope the HELL out of your insane asshole.
 
2012-11-19 02:39:11 AM  

Yogimus: The One True TheDavid: quatchi:

I'm kind of a perpetual smartass, which I recognize as a coping mechanism for dealing with life's insanity.

I'm an insane asshole. Cope with that.

I'll cope the HELL out of your insane asshole.


Apparently it's quite remarkable by all accounts.
 
2012-11-19 02:40:31 AM  
I've seen the brochures!
 
2012-11-19 03:19:51 AM  

sage37: At 23 I tried drinking myself to death, too. Dunno how he managed it on a litre.


Wondering the same-plus most folks vomit before getting poisoned-
Story doesn't make sense
Sad for him though
 
2012-11-19 03:29:11 AM  
My grampa died literally exactly like that!
 
2012-11-19 04:55:28 AM  

The One True TheDavid: I'm an intellectual because I dropped out of 8th grade but I still know a lot. Except for science, math, getting along with people, contributing anything useful to the world around me... But I do know who the first non-Rashidun caliph was and my IQ is almost high enough for Mensa. Though it's rapidly diminishing because I drink too farking much.

Watching paint dry is hard work. You try it.


I must have skipped 9th grade, was that the getting along with people year?
 
2012-11-19 07:20:15 AM  
Key word is "men." Switch to male and it makes more sense.
 
2012-11-19 09:26:03 AM  

Lets talk frankly about internal cleanliness: LovingTeacher: Deedeemarz: That story seems off. Not even the Twilight part (as sad as that is), but a known alcoholic dying with a BAC of 0.57? And a Kiwi, aged 23? That just doesn't seem like a high enough level to kill a person who is a chronic drinker. We see levels that high frequently in alcoholics; unless it is a binge drinker they usually don't even suffer many effects-they just sleep it off and head back out for more. Strange story.

Nah, .57% is in the range that COULD kill a heavy drinker, you're right with experience a drinker CAN handle it but over .50% is lethal for some people and chronic drinkers are not the healthiest of people, he might have seriously compromised his health in other ways that contributed to the death. I used one of those online BAC calculators to see where I was for the last 5 years of my drinking, I probably ran from about .40% - .50% for about 5 years straight and occasionally went overboard as evidenced by the occaisonal blackouts. Plus like a few people have said there might have been other drugs involved and why even check for them, he obviously died from either alcohol alone or the combination of drugs and alcohol they aren't going to waste a lot of time and money on checking him out. Yes it is sad and he is still a human but the cops are not really worried about us drunks and junkies so they'll just let it go.

Eh, YMMV, but I'm of the opinion that bad things tend to happen at a greater frequency when your the stuff your heart is pumping weighs is only 43% blood.


That's a common misconception but the percent of alcohol in his system was not 57% but .57% so the % of blood was 99.43%. Since Johnny Walker is only 40% alcohol (80 proof) you could never drink yourself up to 57% alcohol even if you replaced all of your blood with alcohol.
 
2012-11-19 09:48:21 AM  

Matticus: Glad to see them breaking the story 2 and a half years later


This. Not sure why it says 2010 in the article but it is posted recently...
 
2012-11-19 11:41:34 AM  
My friends got bored one night over a year ago and did their own Twilight drinking game. It consisted of exactly one rule:

- Take ONE drink at any visible or implied scorn.

They blacked out halfway through New Moon.
 
2012-11-19 11:54:38 AM  
Reminds me of the movie, "Leaving Las Vegas." Drank himself to death - enough damage from long-term drinking and then the last bottle was the last straw for this dude.. His body said F this, I'm done!
 
2012-11-19 11:55:09 AM  
meh.. been done before with a much better film..
 
2012-11-19 03:17:42 PM  
Faced with suicide? Not always such a bleak option after all.
 
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