If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(KJRH Tulsa)   After three years in the making, Ten Commandments monument at Oklahoma state capitol finally unveiled. Unfortunately during that three year period, no one ever thought to run a spell check on it   (kjrh.com) divider line 321
    More: Fail, Oklahoma State Capitol, Ten Commandments, Oklahoma, Ten Commandments monument, Broken Arrow, misspellings, orbital period  
•       •       •

30586 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Nov 2012 at 3:48 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



321 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-11-16 01:24:59 PM

propasaurus: Thou shalt have no other gods...

Wait. There are other gods?


Well there WERE, but if you read the Old Testament literally God went all Michael Corleone on them and consoldiated the Family business
 
2012-11-16 01:25:23 PM

propasaurus: Thou shalt have no other gods...

Wait. There are other gods?


Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;

Indefinite article. I.e., one of several. God admits he's not alone more than once.
 
2012-11-16 01:32:12 PM

doyner: propasaurus: Thou shalt have no other gods...

Wait. There are other gods?

Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;

Indefinite article. I.e., one of several. God admits he's not alone more than once.


And He was married at the time. King David did his best to wipe out all mention of Her.
 
2012-11-16 01:45:10 PM
I was wondering what was wrong with desiring a small, high-pitched, transverse flute.
 
2012-11-16 01:45:45 PM

doyner: propasaurus: Thou shalt have no other gods...

Wait. There are other gods?

Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;

Indefinite article. I.e., one of several. God admits he's not alone more than once.


"Let us make man in our own image."
 
2012-11-16 01:47:54 PM

God Is My Co-Pirate: doyner: propasaurus: Thou shalt have no other gods...

Wait. There are other gods?

Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;

Indefinite article. I.e., one of several. God admits he's not alone more than once.

"Let us make man in our own image."


Great. I knew man must have been designed by a committee.
 
2012-11-16 01:53:05 PM

God Is My Co-Pirate: doyner: propasaurus: Thou shalt have no other gods...

Wait. There are other gods?

Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;

Indefinite article. I.e., one of several. God admits he's not alone more than once.

"Let us make man in our own image."


God has thirteen "attributes."

simplicimus: God Is My Co-Pirate: doyner: propasaurus: Thou shalt have no other gods...

Wait. There are other gods?

Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;

Indefinite article. I.e., one of several. God admits he's not alone more than once.

"Let us make man in our own image."

Great. I knew man must have been designed by a committee.


Clearly we are the product of groupthink.
 
2012-11-16 01:56:53 PM
You know the people who wanted that thing there in the first place are the same ones who keep talking about how the want their state to succeed from the US and carry signs that say descent is the highest form of patriotic, right?

So I don't actually see this as a problem.
 
wee [TotalFark]
2012-11-16 02:00:53 PM

unlikely: want their state to succeed from the US


And they're doing very well, too!
 
2012-11-16 02:04:46 PM

wee: unlikely: want their state to succeed from the US

And they're doing very well, too!


As long as they don't try to secede.
 
2012-11-16 02:06:26 PM
Wait a second...

You mean to tell me it's not "Thou shalt not omit adultery"?
 
2012-11-16 02:08:08 PM

Diogenes: God has thirteen "attributes."



Which, while I recognize that theology as coming from the Kabbalah, is an exceptionally Hindu thing to say. Apparently Hinduism is technically Monotheistic in that they say that the "big three" SHiva Vishnu and Brahamin are actually emanations of the original Pan-universal Godhead Atman, and all the lesser gods and goddesses are in turn manifestations of the big three
 
2012-11-16 02:09:40 PM

Friskya: Wait a second...

You mean to tell me it's not "Thou shalt not omit adultery"?


That's on the third tablet;
* Thou shalt not commit adultery during weekends and holidays.
 
2012-11-16 02:16:13 PM

Magorn: propasaurus: Thou shalt have no other gods...

Wait. There are other gods?

Well there WERE, but if you read the Old Testament literally God went all Michael Corleone on them and consoldiated the Family business



I hear He shot Enlil right in the eye.
 
2012-11-16 02:18:15 PM

Diogenes: God Is My Co-Pirate: doyner: propasaurus: Thou shalt have no other gods...

Wait. There are other gods?

Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;

Indefinite article. I.e., one of several. God admits he's not alone more than once.

"Let us make man in our own image."

God has thirteen "attributes."

simplicimus: God Is My Co-Pirate: doyner: propasaurus: Thou shalt have no other gods...

Wait. There are other gods?

Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;

Indefinite article. I.e., one of several. God admits he's not alone more than once.

"Let us make man in our own image."

Great. I knew man must have been designed by a committee.

Clearly we are the product of groupthink.


Gives new meaning to "cloudsource."
 
2012-11-16 02:19:47 PM
Don't worry everyone, a lady from spain is going to restore this. She has experience with these things.
 
2012-11-16 02:23:21 PM
i26.tinypic.com
 
2012-11-16 02:27:16 PM

Magorn: Diogenes: God has thirteen "attributes."


Which, while I recognize that theology as coming from the Kabbalah, is an exceptionally Hindu thing to say. Apparently Hinduism is technically Monotheistic in that they say that the "big three" SHiva Vishnu and Brahamin are actually emanations of the original Pan-universal Godhead Atman, and all the lesser gods and goddesses are in turn manifestations of the big three


Different archetypes. Same way of slicing and dicing the universe.

/jung
 
2012-11-16 02:32:39 PM
 
Pud [TotalFark]
2012-11-16 02:32:57 PM

simplicimus: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.


That was the honey-do list his wife gave him.
 
2012-11-16 02:45:38 PM
Oklahoma Ten Commandments:

1. Thall shalt not worship anyone other than Ralph Dale Earnhardt, Sr.
2. Take off your hat at the table.
3. Remember to watch the OSU game
4. Do what your Pappy says, and don't sass your Mama.
5. You shall not kill without a permit or outside hunting season
6. If I catch you and your teenage cousin alone in the barn again....
7. Don't take nuthin that ain't yours.
8. Lies make baby Jesus cry
9. Jealousy will get you nowhere.
10. Rubbin' is racin'
 
2012-11-16 02:57:35 PM

Pud: simplicimus: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.

That was the honey-do list his wife gave him.


Outside of "Keep the Palm trees watered", what else would be on the list?
 
2012-11-16 03:02:02 PM
You'd think God would fix the typos for them. Ungrateful bastard.
 
2012-11-16 03:03:14 PM

simplicimus: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.


Probably something about not buggering sheep.
 
2012-11-16 03:21:03 PM

give me doughnuts: simplicimus: Paris1127: simplicimus: Magorn: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Well actually THREE tablets, 5 on each, didn't you see the movie?

Yeah, I saw the movie. But on the bright side, we have 5 fewer commandments.

I wonder what was on that tablet... Perhaps a commandment about loving other people even if you disagree with him or her?

Well, the first 5 are man's relationship with God, the second 5 are man's relationship with fellow humans. No idea what would be on the third tablet.

Probably something about not buggering sheep.


Paging Mr. Black... Will Mr. Lewis Black please pick up the Fark courtesy phone?

Around the 4:08 mark.
 
2012-11-16 03:30:21 PM
Serious question - how many of the ten commandments actually make sense for a secular person? 3?
 
2012-11-16 03:36:09 PM

DamnYankees: Serious question - how many of the ten commandments actually make sense for a secular person? 3?


"Be excellent to each other."
That covers the secular part.
 
2012-11-16 03:53:00 PM
Teh Ten Commandments.
 
2012-11-16 03:53:38 PM
2nd page and not this yet. Farkers are slipping
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com
 
2012-11-16 03:55:42 PM
The misspellings are there on purpose so that those who break them have an out.
 
2012-11-16 03:57:09 PM
that monument looks like a butt
 
2012-11-16 03:57:43 PM

Loucifer: Teh Ten Commandments.


1 Then Ceiling Cat spoked all them werds:

2 I iz Ceiling Cat An I iz Top Cat, An I broughted u out of hawt litturbawx wit no cheezbrgrs for hard mousin at all

3 No can has other ceiling cat!! U gotz other Ceiling Cat, I shoot yous wit mah lollazer eyes. Srsly.

4 If u try be Ceiling Cat of any of mai creayshunz up in floaty skai, down in erth or in watr or I shoot yous wit mah lollazer eyes.

5 If u think faek Ceiling Cat iz Ceiling Cat, I mek u ded An ur kittenz ded An if yur kittenz have kittenz, dey be ded too, for being stupid and stuffs.

6 If not I wuv u An all ur lotz uf kittenz!

7 U sez Ceiling Cat bad, I shoot yous wit mah lollazer eyes, cuz I dun liek it. Srsly.

8 Remembur Caturday An keep holy.

9 U ketch mousies 6 dais An finish ketchin, K?

10 Caturday, u no ketchin mousies. U An all ur peepz go wrship me. And, if yu beez gudd, I maks it so yu can stays home and do alla stuffs yu wanted tu doos.

11 I maded heavenz An erth An see An the stuff that does teh funney hoppey stuffz in An on it - so I make it holy cuz I no ketch mousies.

12 Bez u good to papa kitteh An mama kitteh so u has long nine liefs.

13 U no maek peepz ded with teh malice! Srsly!

14 U no maek sexxes wit other gurlz or menz than urs (that mi jobz!).

15 U no taek cheezburgerz for free if not getz for free.

16 U no tell bad stuff ov ur neibor.

17 U no wantz neibor cheezburgerz! No wief, no gurlz, no menz, no abimalz, NO BUKKITZ! DEY NOT UR BUKKITZ, K? dey da LOLrus' bukkits.

18 When peepz see mai great orkestr wit thundr An all cool speshul effects thei wur scairdey wimps

19 Thei sed to Mozus 'U goez speek to uz An we will listen; but Ceiling Cat will shoot us wit His lazer eyes!'

20 Mozus LOL'd lotz, An a bit moar, for thei wuz such scairdies, An sed 'Ceiling Cat no maek u ded; he just wantz to hav fun wit u gais An maek u scairdey cats so u obei him.'

21 But peepz wur still scairdies An let Mozus go ther to Ceiling Cat.
Ceiling Cat roolz for idles an alters
22 Ceiling Cat sez "Tellz them scairdies: 'U see I meowed to u from big ceilingz.

23 U no mek me of silvar or goldz.

24 U mek me altar of kitteh-litturz An gif me pwnz0rzed animulz ther An I gif u cheezburgr.

25 But u no maek me altar of bjutiful stonez. DO NOT WANT!

26 An u no use steps on altar or I can see ur penises. DO NOT WANT!"
 
2012-11-16 03:59:03 PM
imageshack.us
 
2012-11-16 04:01:20 PM
White-Out can fix anything...
 
2012-11-16 04:02:08 PM
I like these more:

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-11-16 04:02:14 PM
Can't fix it.
It's God's will.
 
2012-11-16 04:05:01 PM
Is it just me or is the "take his name in vain" one misspelled "tahe"? "Thou shalt not kill" seems to have a distinctly different looking "k"
 
2012-11-16 04:05:03 PM
I'm glad the ACLU decided to stand down, this time. As long as they don't try to correct the spelling, it should be allowed to stand. As a monument to........well, I'm sure you can all figure that out.
 
2012-11-16 04:05:14 PM
Look, proper spelling is for elitists. If the faithful feel that the monument is correct, then the monument is correct. Why do you hate Jesus and God and the angels and Heaven and 'Murca, and George Washington and Liberty teeth?
 
2012-11-16 04:05:46 PM
>$10k for a ga'damned headstone that isn't even spelled right?

Fundies are suckers, but I repeat myself.


/they forgot a crying eagle
 
GBB [TotalFark]
2012-11-16 04:05:48 PM
If the Christians can have their 10 commandments. Then they need to put up the Ferengi Rules of Acquisition, too.
 
2012-11-16 04:06:31 PM

St_Francis_P: This certainly helps dispel the stereotypes.


So mote it be.
 
2012-11-16 04:08:06 PM

simplicimus: DamnYankees: Serious question - how many of the ten commandments actually make sense for a secular person? 3?

"Be excellent to each other."
That covers the secular part.


lh3.googleusercontent.com
 
2012-11-16 04:08:38 PM
I was hoping to see this make Fark.
 
2012-11-16 04:09:15 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

Do you think any of 'em actually read any of the book?


FTFY
 
2012-11-16 04:09:17 PM

vernonFL: Oklahoma Ten Commandments:

1. Thall shalt not worship anyone other than Ralph Dale Earnhardt, Sr.
2. Take off your hat at the table.
3. Remember to watch the OSU game
4. Do what your Pappy says, and don't sass your Mama.
5. You shall not kill without a permit or outside hunting season
6. If I catch you and your teenage cousin alone in the barn again....
7. Don't take nuthin that ain't yours.
8. Lies make baby Jesus cry
9. Jealousy will get you nowhere.
10. Rubbin' is racin'


Almost. Except most of the redneck types in Oklahoma are OU fans, though they never set foot on campus.
 
2012-11-16 04:10:18 PM

simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?


I certainly haven't. Where does it say how many commandment were on each tablet?
 
2012-11-16 04:11:04 PM
It looks more like they buried the 10 commandments there and put up that marker.
 
2012-11-16 04:11:36 PM

gilgigamesh: simplicimus: The design is wrong. It's two three two tablets, 5 on each. Did this guy even read the Old Testament?

[lesposen.files.wordpress.com image 648x292]
Oy.


Came for this, leaving satisfied.
 
2012-11-16 04:12:14 PM
Jesus weapt.
 
Displayed 50 of 321 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »





Report