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(BBC) NewsFlash Hamas rockets land just outside Jerusalem. If they hit a holy site, one of three religions is going to be PISSED   (bbc.co.uk) divider line 55
    More: NewsFlash, Hamas, Jerusalem, Israel Radio, City of God, Iron Dome, Gaza, population center, rockets  
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7956 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Nov 2012 at 11:57 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»


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Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2012-11-16 12:04:51 PM
7 votes:
Should we really use the img1.fark.net if the breaking news is 5000 years old?
2012-11-16 11:59:38 AM
7 votes:

Amurica...Fark Ya!: Duuurrrrrr......religion.....hurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr r


/it's 2012 for fark's sake
//science ftw


I bet you'd get pretty upset if they launched a missile at the Large Hadron Collider, though. :D
2012-11-16 12:03:54 PM
5 votes:
So one side has some rockets whose operating instructions are basically "light fuse, aim away from face," and the other side has UAVs, tanks, guided weaponry, and missile shields.

www.specktra.net
I can't wait to find out how this turns out. The suspense is killing me.
2012-11-16 12:03:39 PM
5 votes:
dpsshow.com
2012-11-16 12:19:59 PM
4 votes:
bokertov.typepad.com

/stokes the fire
2012-11-16 12:13:42 PM
4 votes:

HotIgneous Intruder: oh good.

/Got all those weapons, might as well unleash them on the folks who've been penned up for two generations in a 141 square-mile concentration camp and are lashing out again.
//Genocide: It's OK when Israel does it.


Gaza Strip population has tripled since 1995.

WORST. GENOCIDE. EVAR.
2012-11-16 12:13:56 PM
3 votes:
I saw we send in a seal team. They could sneak up behind Israel, inflate a LARGE brown paper bag, and then POP it.

The flinch should be enough to get this war rolling.
2012-11-16 12:10:15 PM
3 votes:
I'm glad these Hamas guys don't run NASA. Their rockets can't hit crap.
2012-11-16 12:05:42 PM
3 votes:

moops: Israel should now invade Gaza, and not leave until they've liquidated every single Hamas member.


how do you do that? with a centrifuge?
2012-11-16 12:04:40 PM
3 votes:
Its like the Hatfields and Mccoys except they've been fighting for 2000+ years and there is no pig involved...
2012-11-17 11:12:31 AM
2 votes:
Yeah yesterday I was getting out of the shower and I had to rush to put on my pants.

I was forced by terrorists to put on pants.

FARK YOU HAMAS.
2012-11-16 04:39:22 PM
2 votes:
This one goes out to Amos Q.

In my country there is problem,
And that problem is transport.
It take very very long,
Because Kazakhstan is big.

Throw transport down the well
So my country can be free
We must make travel easy
Then we'll have a big party

In my country there is problem
And that problem is the Jew
They take everybody money
And they never give it back

Throw the jew down the well
So my country can be free
You must grab him by his horns
Then we have a big party

If you see the Jew coming
You must be carefull of his teeth
You must grab him by his money
And I tell you what to do

Throw the jew down the well
So my country can be free
You must grab him by his horns
Then we have a big party
2012-11-16 03:28:17 PM
2 votes:

Galloping Galoshes: Seraphym: they have a right to stop those trying to kill them for just existing.

How dare you! What an ill-conceived philosophy! I don't know how you can live with yourself, thinking such nonsense.


I know, I know, it's an antiquated notion I got from this one somewhat humorous captain.

i.qkme.me
2012-11-16 12:36:04 PM
2 votes:

gerrymander:
Fanaticism is a human problem, not a religious problem.


That's a load of crap. It's purely a religion problem. Just the other day I was arguing with another one of those Patriots fans (who all deserve to die -- they are evil!) about this. I don't understand how anyone who can like Tom Brady and Bill Belicheat can possibly think their opinion rises to be worth examining. It's a lot like farking Republicans and their whole party -- it's not much different from people who believe in universal health care in other countries! And don't get me started on those environmentalists. It's like they don't understand that we don't care about "evidence" and think this "reason" shiat is going to help. No, they're wrong, and that's that. I know because it's generally accepted, and that's what I was brought up with! Speaking of, this is the farking year of the Linux Desktop, whether anyone likes it or not -- Microsoft will be bankrupt in 2 months, and everyone will be running Ubuntu, even in their socks and shoes.
2012-11-16 12:35:58 PM
2 votes:
The My Little Pony Killer


Let's keep encroaching on the land we shoved these people off onto and see if we can't get sunshine and rainbows from them.

/what Israel seriously believes

^ What r'tards who failed history actually believe.
2012-11-16 12:33:24 PM
2 votes:
ambarussa.files.wordpress.com
2012-11-16 12:25:19 PM
2 votes:
Saladin: Will you yield the city?
Balian of Ibelin: Before I lose it, I will burn it to the ground. Your holy places - ours. Every last thing in Jerusalem that drives men mad.
Saladin: I wonder if it would not be better if you did.

- Kindom of Heaven. Awesome movie.
2012-11-16 12:23:15 PM
2 votes:

Jiro Dreams Of McRibs: nmemkha: Jews, Muslims, and Christians all worship the God of Abraham. They are literally fighting each other in the name of the same God.

But Abram came from Sumer and was a polytheist. Until he out-Sauled Saul of Tarsus. Why do people have to change teams??? What was so wrong with Marduk?


Marduk is too busy jonseing for Stimutacs.
2012-11-16 12:20:01 PM
2 votes:

SpectroBoy: I saw we send in a seal team. They could sneak up behind Israel, inflate a LARGE brown paper bag, and then POP it.

The flinch should be enough to get this war rolling.


Dude.. How inhumane are you? Don't you think that's a bit extreme? What's next huh? HUH? Grabbing someones nose, then curling your thumb between your index and middle finger while declaring GOT YOUR NOSE?

WHEN DOES IT STOP MAN???
2012-11-16 12:12:25 PM
2 votes:

cgraves67: I'm glad these Hamas guys don't run NASA. Their rockets can't hit crap.


"We've just received word that the mars rover has launched and then immediately crashed into sesame street killing 13 , ah, ah, ah"
2012-11-16 12:07:38 PM
2 votes:
I love Egypt's take on it- what the hell, guys! Why aren't you letting them fire rockets at you?!
2012-11-16 12:01:12 PM
2 votes:
The dune coons are at it again...
2012-11-16 12:01:03 PM
2 votes:
Things Israeli heating up over there.

/from other thread
2012-11-16 03:52:13 PM
1 votes:

Quick Fixer: Amos Quito: RULES OF ENGAGEMENT :

[Derp]

...yes, Amos you and Deuteronomy

Wait... There are meat-trees in Israel?

Maybe there is something worth fighting over over there...


Well, yeeaah? They've taxonomied them an' everything, duh:

www.yongsshin.com

It's called the Holy Land, dude... they've got everything.

NSFW Example

/different type of meat
2012-11-16 02:27:53 PM
1 votes:

that bosnian sniper: Oh god, a rocket, shiat's done got real now. Or is this just the lucky one that made it through half the Gaza strip being carpeted in willy pete several times over now?


You knopw what burns hotter than white phosphorus?


The stupid.
2012-11-16 01:25:06 PM
1 votes:

nmemkha: It's unquestionably the stupidest premise in the history of Hollywood.


I think you may underestimate them.
2012-11-16 01:22:10 PM
1 votes:

mekki: Mengele


Aaaaand Nazis. Shut it down, folks. Shut it all down.
2012-11-16 01:08:15 PM
1 votes:
garotasperversas.files.wordpress.com
2012-11-16 12:57:18 PM
1 votes:

BigNumber12: AverageAmericanGuy: That's the difference between Jews, Christians, and Muslims. Christians don't believe that The Law holds any sway over believers. Therefore holy sites are nice tourist attractions, but don't have any intrinsic spiritual value.


Sadly, that's not true for Christians inside Jerusalem. That conflict, however, is usually sorted out with brooms and fists.

Monks gone wild at Jesus' birth site


Oh, that's nice. I'm sure had Peter had a broom in hand rather than a sword when the soldiers came to arrest him, Jesus would have shouted "Yeah, kick his a$$ Peter! Come on, swing that broom: upper cut, upper cut!"
2012-11-16 12:53:38 PM
1 votes:
My personal opinion is that we blow up every religious site in Jerusalem. Then the idiots won't have a religious excuse for their violence. It'll just be what it really is: financial, political, social, racial conflict.
2012-11-16 12:51:12 PM
1 votes:

BigNumber12: AverageAmericanGuy: That's the difference between Jews, Christians, and Muslims. Christians don't believe that The Law holds any sway over believers. Therefore holy sites are nice tourist attractions, but don't have any intrinsic spiritual value.


Sadly, that's not true for Christians inside Jerusalem. That conflict, however, is usually sorted out with brooms and fists.

Monks gone wild at Jesus' birth site


www.nypost.com

"I'm gonna beat you like a temple money changer!"
2012-11-16 12:50:19 PM
1 votes:

muck4doo: Jiro Dreams Of McRibs: nmemkha: Jews, Muslims, and Christians all worship the God of Abraham. They are literally fighting each other in the name of the same God.

But Abram came from Sumer and was a polytheist. Until he out-Sauled Saul of Tarsus. Why do people have to change teams??? What was so wrong with Marduk?

He was from Ur, specifically, which was the seat of worship for Sin, the moon god, not Marduk. That was Babylon.


I gotta see his birth certificate first. Otherwise, I'm betting on Kenya.
2012-11-16 12:44:58 PM
1 votes:
2012-11-16 12:43:58 PM
1 votes:
Are we at this step again? Someone wake me after Israel drives some tanks through playgrounds, but before the random suicide bombings start.
2012-11-16 12:42:53 PM
1 votes:

kindms: This is BS.

Bibi f-ing assassinated the head of Hamas Security forces just the other day. That guy was working with others to get a ceasefire done. Bibi's extra judicial assassination is what touched off the latest round of fighting.

http://electronicintifada.net/blogs/ali-abunimah/how-israel-shattered - gaza-truce-leading-escalating-death-and-tragedy-timeline



Electronic Intifada, huh? Sounds objective to me.

The revisionist history has already begun on this one. NOTHING WAS HAPPENING BEFORE THAT AIRSTRIKE!!! Ahmed Jabari was handing out Unicorn foals to orphans when he was targeted!
2012-11-16 12:39:28 PM
1 votes:
www.bangitout.com
2012-11-16 12:38:20 PM
1 votes:

Spaced Cowboy: ChipNASA: TATS

The whiny little douche finally put the last active Farker on his hilariously oversized ignore list. When he next logged in and saw zero comments, he thought the place shut down and moved on.

That's my theory anyways.


The funny thing someone else said the other day was

"Oh, TATSUMA?!?!! I hacked his calendar and set it so every day was Saturday"

/I forget who said that but I LARFED!!!!
2012-11-16 12:22:10 PM
1 votes:
i.imgur.com
2012-11-16 12:20:58 PM
1 votes:
Whoa, whoa, whoa. There is turmoil in the middle east!? When did this happen!?
2012-11-16 12:18:35 PM
1 votes:

mekki: Amurica...Fark Ya!: Duuurrrrrr......religion.....hurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr r


/it's 2012 for fark's sake
//science ftw

Ah, yes, science. You know, what you use to make the rockets and bombs.

Anyone who thinks science is always peaceful and religion is always violent is an idiot. It's hard to keep wars going if all you have are stones that you've picked off the ground. That's where science kicks in and shows you all the new ways to kill people. Many where you are thousands of miles away and you don't even have to leave your desk.


I am not sure how, but you managed to put your entire head up your ass there
2012-11-16 12:12:02 PM
1 votes:

mekki: Amurica...Fark Ya!: Duuurrrrrr......religion.....hurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr r


/it's 2012 for fark's sake
//science ftw

Ah, yes, science. You know, what you use to make the rockets and bombs.

Anyone who thinks science is always peaceful and religion is always violent is an idiot. It's hard to keep wars going if all you have are stones that you've picked off the ground. That's where science kicks in and shows you all the new ways to kill people. Many where you are thousands of miles away and you don't even have to leave your desk.


I... I don't even know how to respond to this.

I... just can't...
2012-11-16 12:11:49 PM
1 votes:

Headso: moops: Israel should now invade Gaza, and not leave until they've liquidated every single Hamas member.

how do you do that? with a centrifuge?


Centrifuge would work. I would have also accepted "grinder", "mill", or "press"
2012-11-16 12:11:17 PM
1 votes:
Some of the rockets that have been used so far are Iranian made. Think Israel's going to use that as their excuse to bomb Iran?
2012-11-16 12:07:52 PM
1 votes:
It wasn't holy enough, subby.

Would you please leave them to their daily worship?
2012-11-16 12:06:49 PM
1 votes:
anongallery.org
2012-11-16 12:05:57 PM
1 votes:

bostonguy: nmemkha: Jews, Muslims, and Christians all worship the God of Abraham. They are literally fighting each other in the name of the same God.

Uh, it's more like one of them is fighting the other two, and often themselves when individual sects disagree.


That's heresy! Prepare to die, Infidel!
2012-11-16 12:05:51 PM
1 votes:
Damnit Boston. GTFO of town. Isn't this a wonderful time of year to head west for a European Vacation? I've seen the movie. It looks like a blast. BE THE PIG man! Its kosher I think.
2012-11-16 12:05:44 PM
1 votes:

Silly Jesus: Should we really use the [img1.fark.net image 54x11] if the breaking news is 5000 years old?


Or news that is otherwise known as "Tuesday".
2012-11-16 12:05:42 PM
1 votes:

Amurica...Fark Ya!: Duuurrrrrr......religion.....hurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr r


/it's 2012 for fark's sake
//science ftw


Science was created by the devil to trick men in to shunning God. I hope you're happy now, you fell for it hook, line, and pitchfork!
2012-11-16 12:05:15 PM
1 votes:
I didn't think you could swing a dead cat without hitting something religious to someone around there
2012-11-16 12:05:06 PM
1 votes:
Not that they will but, yeah, if Hamas were to hit the dome of the rock or something... I wouldn't know whether to smirk or tense.
2012-11-16 12:04:06 PM
1 votes:
Israel should now invade Gaza, and not leave until they've liquidated every single Hamas member.
2012-11-16 12:01:45 PM
1 votes:
Hope they didn't kill any innocent Holy shiates!
2012-11-16 12:01:35 PM
1 votes:

FitzShivering: I bet you'd get pretty upset if they launched a missile at the Large Hadron Collider, though. :D


my science!
2012-11-16 12:01:09 PM
1 votes:
oh good.

/Got all those weapons, might as well unleash them on the folks who've been penned up for two generations in a 141 square-mile concentration camp and are lashing out again.
//Genocide: It's OK when Israel does it.
 
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