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(Daily Mail)   Deadly black widow spider from Texas invades England, has hundreds of babies...hey look out, there is one on your arm   (dailymail.co.uk ) divider line
    More: Scary, Norfolk, Texas, England, venomous spiders, myalgias, Department of Zoology  
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13168 clicks; posted to Main » on 15 Nov 2012 at 11:55 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



144 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2012-11-15 07:48:24 PM  
But remember: they're only a little deadly.

/Good luck English people from you're neighbors across the pond
 
2012-11-15 07:51:28 PM  

Voiceofreason01: But remember: they're only a little deadly.

/Good luck English people from you're neighbors across the pond


*your

/fark
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2012-11-15 07:55:44 PM  
the notoriously viscous spider

It's only viscous after you squish it.
 
2012-11-15 08:16:33 PM  
guy has a tattoo on his arm...of a spider...lolz
 
2012-11-15 08:38:40 PM  
Buncha pansies. I have to clear out hundreds of these every year, silly things like building nests in my goddamn mailbox.
 
2012-11-15 09:11:08 PM  
Black Widow's bite reported to be 15 times stronger than a rattlesnake's ... by the Department of Anally-Derived Statistics.

Engineers at the plant discovered the notoriously viscous spider ... So just chill them a bit and they become syrupy and immobile. Problem solved!
 
2012-11-15 09:39:05 PM  

ZAZ: the notoriously viscous spider

It's only viscous after you squish it.


That article was full of errors a good editor would have never missed.
 
2012-11-15 09:56:01 PM  

bdub77: ZAZ: the notoriously viscous spider

It's only viscous after you squish it.

That article was full of errors a good editor would have never missed.


Unfortunately, it was written for the Daily Fail.
 
2012-11-15 10:28:07 PM  
Vicious spider? They're scared to death of coming in contact with you, they run away from a gentle breeze. And deadly? Maybe to a baby or a very old person. What happened to the stiff upper lip, Britain?

Oh and all spiders are venomous, you Daily Fail knobs. You mean poisonous to humans. 

/Loves spiders.
 
2012-11-15 10:44:55 PM  
Easy there Brits. Having lived 40+ years right smack dab in black widow territory, you have to work really hard to get bitten. If you spend lots of time climbing around under houses in crawl spaces you might want to carry some bug spray with you but otherwise don't sweat it.
 
2012-11-15 11:50:11 PM  
Gedanken Experiment:

You are British, arrange the following in order of scare factor:

Blood pudding
Black Widows
Letting some kid grow a mustache for Movember.
 
2012-11-15 11:57:59 PM  

bdub77: ZAZ: the notoriously viscous spider

It's only viscous after you squish it.

That article was full of errors a good editor would have never missed.


It was the unpossible to use ele4ctric spell checkers.
 
2012-11-16 12:02:45 AM  
Well, you try writing an article when you're paralysed by the ingrained pommie terror of all things araneid.
 
2012-11-16 12:02:57 AM  
Nope. Nope nope nope nope nope.
 
2012-11-16 12:03:14 AM  
There are blacks in Texas?
 
2012-11-16 12:06:53 AM  

vossiewulf: Easy there Brits. Having lived 40+ years right smack dab in black widow territory, you have to work really hard to get bitten. If you spend lots of time climbing around under houses in crawl spaces you might want to carry some bug spray with you but otherwise don't sweat it.


Yup. They're really easy to live with. Just don't poke them or their next.

The hobo spider on the other hand will charge 4-6 feet just to bite you because fark you that's why.
 
2012-11-16 12:07:25 AM  
As someone who has been bitten by both a Black Widow and a Brown Recluse, I can safely say "Quit your goddamned whining, England."

Seriously though, these aren't exactly the most dangerous thing we've exported to the United Kingdom. As I recall, Plaxico Burress played a game there once.
 
2012-11-16 12:08:17 AM  
It's started...

d.gr-assets.com
 
2012-11-16 12:08:35 AM  
I'm scared of spiders.
 
2012-11-16 12:10:25 AM  

Captain James T. Smirk: As someone who has been bitten by both a Black Widow and a Brown Recluse, I can safely say "Quit your goddamned whining, England."

Seriously though, these aren't exactly the most dangerous thing we've exported to the United Kingdom. As I recall, Plaxico Burress played a game there once.


B.S. without pics. Nobody gets bit by a Brown Recluse and doesn't take pictures of the extruded sausage hamburger that results.

/I've seen it.
//It ain't pretty
///Iowa
 
2012-11-16 12:10:54 AM  
We should respect the Black Widow's culture and work hard to integrate her 100 offspring.
 
2012-11-16 12:12:05 AM  
lol, i literally have 4 or 5 around my house because i haven't sprayed in a while. they ARE deadly, if you go up to one and let it crawl on you. then aggravate it, then don't seek medical attention AND you are old, a baby, or sick. essentially a Darwin device.

/one bites me in my sleep and i die tonight.
 
2012-11-16 12:14:10 AM  
Oh, no!
There goes Tokyo!
Oh oh Black Widow!

/don't fear the Ropers
 
2012-11-16 12:15:29 AM  

Sherman Potter: Captain James T. Smirk: As someone who has been bitten by both a Black Widow and a Brown Recluse, I can safely say "Quit your goddamned whining, England."

Seriously though, these aren't exactly the most dangerous thing we've exported to the United Kingdom. As I recall, Plaxico Burress played a game there once.

B.S. without pics. Nobody gets bit by a Brown Recluse and doesn't take pictures of the extruded sausage hamburger that results.

/I've seen it.
//It ain't pretty
///Iowa


I got bit on the arm while I was at Fort Jackson, SC. The Drill Sergeants had a pre-arranged plan for recluse bites, even though they were rare and even though necrosis from a recluse bite happens less than half of the time. About fifteen seconds after I got bit, slapped my arm, saw the remains of a recluse, and said "Oh, shiat", I was on a truck on the way to the base hospital, and within ten minutes I was getting my arm washed down with about thirty different soaps and being needled full of all kinds of meds. Ended up with nothing but a normal-looking, tiny spider bite that went away in a couple of days.
 
2012-11-16 12:16:50 AM  
Black Widow spiders are common around here. They like to make their nests on the inside corners of my house's exterior. The webs are very irregular and are annoying because they tend to pick up a lot of debris and are unsightly.

So during their peak season, I take a flashlight and a shoe and walk the perimeter of the house just after dark when they've come out. I crush all the spiders I see. I think my record was to crush 15 BWs and three scorpions in one night. I generally leave the tarantulas alone unless they get into the house (only happened once).


/have never found a BW inside the house
//effing scorpions love to come inside, though
 
2012-11-16 12:23:07 AM  
Grew up in the woods in Virginia. I made it my mission as a child to rid our property of those bastards. Killed hundreds of those farkers in a myriad of ways. Where is that stiff upper lip brits?

/Could they even start a population in Britain? Seems like a habit they aren't suited for.
 
2012-11-16 12:24:04 AM  

Captain James T. Smirk: Sherman Potter: Captain James T. Smirk: As someone who has been bitten by both a Black Widow and a Brown Recluse, I can safely say "Quit your goddamned whining, England."

Seriously though, these aren't exactly the most dangerous thing we've exported to the United Kingdom. As I recall, Plaxico Burress played a game there once.

B.S. without pics. Nobody gets bit by a Brown Recluse and doesn't take pictures of the extruded sausage hamburger that results.

/I've seen it.
//It ain't pretty
///Iowa

I got bit on the arm while I was at Fort Jackson, SC. The Drill Sergeants had a pre-arranged plan for recluse bites, even though they were rare and even though necrosis from a recluse bite happens less than half of the time. About fifteen seconds after I got bit, slapped my arm, saw the remains of a recluse, and said "Oh, shiat", I was on a truck on the way to the base hospital, and within ten minutes I was getting my arm washed down with about thirty different soaps and being needled full of all kinds of meds. Ended up with nothing but a normal-looking, tiny spider bite that went away in a couple of days.


Well then, you're lucky. The one I saw was in rural Iowa after a 4-hour trip to the ER. The poor girl's leg looked like raw sausage. Horrible.
 
2012-11-16 12:26:34 AM  
now THAT was the most alarmist, blown- out- of- proportion article i've read today! I especially like the part at the end, after all the gnashing and wailing about deadly black widows, how it quietly says most bites cause no serious damage. Way to go Daily Mail! Hopefully Britain installs some more surveillance cams now, to protect them for this deadly scourge.
 
2012-11-16 12:27:50 AM  
Oh hi.

media.theweek.com
 
2012-11-16 12:28:14 AM  
Yay for living in the Great White North; little farkers would never survive a real winter
 
2012-11-16 12:28:47 AM  
Spiders creep me out. Yesterday, there was a spider on my front door, on the inside, about 6" from the bottom. Told my kid to spray it, and after it died, was a black widow. another time, I was replacing the faucet on th kitchen sink,, shined the light up under the sink, and there was one in the back left corner.. Got out from there, fast , had a plumber replace the faucet. BTW, I live in New Mexico.
 
2012-11-16 12:28:59 AM  
When I was an infant, my parents kept my crib in a corner directly under a black widow's nest.

And I do mean kept, because mommy dearest has verified several times that she intentionally left it there after the nest appeared.
 
2012-11-16 12:29:52 AM  

insertsnarkyusername: Grew up in the woods in Virginia. I made it my mission as a child to rid our property of those bastards. Killed hundreds of those farkers in a myriad of ways. Where is that stiff upper lip brits?

/Could they even start a population in Britain? Seems like a habit they aren't suited for.


I don't think we have room to say anything given our fear mongering over the pythons in Florida.
 
2012-11-16 12:30:55 AM  
Boris, you have visitors
 
2012-11-16 12:32:42 AM  

insertsnarkyusername: Grew up in the woods in Virginia. I made it my mission as a child to rid our property of those bastards. Killed hundreds of those farkers in a myriad of ways. Where is that stiff upper lip brits?

/Could they even start a population in Britain? Seems like a habit they aren't suited for.


I don't know, they seemed get thicker when it was cool and wet. Fall in the AZ, the BW would get started laying eggs, still warmish, around the end of Monsoon.

Seems like too cold to get too a strong foothold.

/PUSSY!
 
2012-11-16 12:33:36 AM  
Have yet to find a black widow around here (TX) but my home is crawling with rabid wolf spiders (assuming that's what they are). While not the deadliest thing around, you'll certainly know when one has bitten you -- speaking from recent experience.
 
2012-11-16 12:34:40 AM  

Sherman Potter: Captain James T. Smirk: Sherman Potter: Captain James T. Smirk: As someone who has been bitten by both a Black Widow and a Brown Recluse, I can safely say "Quit your goddamned whining, England."

Seriously though, these aren't exactly the most dangerous thing we've exported to the United Kingdom. As I recall, Plaxico Burress played a game there once.

B.S. without pics. Nobody gets bit by a Brown Recluse and doesn't take pictures of the extruded sausage hamburger that results.

/I've seen it.
//It ain't pretty
///Iowa

I got bit on the arm while I was at Fort Jackson, SC. The Drill Sergeants had a pre-arranged plan for recluse bites, even though they were rare and even though necrosis from a recluse bite happens less than half of the time. About fifteen seconds after I got bit, slapped my arm, saw the remains of a recluse, and said "Oh, shiat", I was on a truck on the way to the base hospital, and within ten minutes I was getting my arm washed down with about thirty different soaps and being needled full of all kinds of meds. Ended up with nothing but a normal-looking, tiny spider bite that went away in a couple of days.

Well then, you're lucky. The one I saw was in rural Iowa after a 4-hour trip to the ER. The poor girl's leg looked like raw sausage. Horrible.


You had no reaction, you were out of the natural range of the recluse, and your basing the ID on smushed remains. Are you sure you have the ID correct or do you just assume every brown spider is a recluse?
 
2012-11-16 12:36:57 AM  
Ex-Texan: Spiders creep me out. Yesterday, there was a spider on my front door, on the inside, about 6" from the bottom. Told my kid to spray it, and after it died, was a black widow. another time, I was replacing the faucet on th kitchen sink,, shined the light up under the sink, and there was one in the back left corner.. Got out from there, fast , had a plumber replace the faucet. BTW, I live in New Mexico.

you should move to britain with the rest of the wusses.
 
2012-11-16 12:37:32 AM  

Dinjiin: Black Widow spiders are common around here. They like to make their nests on the inside corners of my house's exterior. The webs are very irregular and are annoying because they tend to pick up a lot of debris and are unsightly.

So during their peak season, I take a flashlight and a shoe and walk the perimeter of the house just after dark when they've come out. I crush all the spiders I see. I think my record was to crush 15 BWs and three scorpions in one night. I generally leave the tarantulas alone unless they get into the house (only happened once).


/have never found a BW inside the house
//effing scorpions love to come inside, though


farkin hell, I am not moving to where you live. My skin is crawling just reading that.
 
2012-11-16 12:45:54 AM  
" the notoriously viscous spider"

Makes it harder to get them off your arm.
 
2012-11-16 12:46:22 AM  

Bumblefark: Have yet to find a black widow around here (TX) but my home is crawling with rabid wolf spiders (assuming that's what they are). While not the deadliest thing around, you'll certainly know when one has bitten you -- speaking from recent experience.


That was actually my favorite method of disposing of black widows. I actually liked the wolf spiders and would leave them alone except for the occasional gladiatorial match with a black widow. The black widows almost never won. The ones that did never survived the second round.

/I was bored a lot as kid.
 
2012-11-16 12:49:42 AM  
Sorry about the new critter brits. Just shake yer shoes out before you put them on and you wont have to worry about the widows. I run into them all the time and as far as Texas fauna goes, they are definately one of the least you have to worry bout. Be thankfull, it could have been Brown Recluses or fire ants. Honestly you got off easy. Yer local hedgehog population should make short work of them.

Unlike our scorpions....shudder.
 
2012-11-16 12:51:32 AM  

Thorny: Sherman Potter: Captain James T. Smirk: Sherman Potter: Captain James T. Smirk: As someone who has been bitten by both a Black Widow and a Brown Recluse, I can safely say "Quit your goddamned whining, England."

Seriously though, these aren't exactly the most dangerous thing we've exported to the United Kingdom. As I recall, Plaxico Burress played a game there once.

B.S. without pics. Nobody gets bit by a Brown Recluse and doesn't take pictures of the extruded sausage hamburger that results.

/I've seen it.
//It ain't pretty
///Iowa

I got bit on the arm while I was at Fort Jackson, SC. The Drill Sergeants had a pre-arranged plan for recluse bites, even though they were rare and even though necrosis from a recluse bite happens less than half of the time. About fifteen seconds after I got bit, slapped my arm, saw the remains of a recluse, and said "Oh, shiat", I was on a truck on the way to the base hospital, and within ten minutes I was getting my arm washed down with about thirty different soaps and being needled full of all kinds of meds. Ended up with nothing but a normal-looking, tiny spider bite that went away in a couple of days.

Well then, you're lucky. The one I saw was in rural Iowa after a 4-hour trip to the ER. The poor girl's leg looked like raw sausage. Horrible.

You had no reaction, you were out of the natural range of the recluse, and your basing the ID on smushed remains. Are you sure you have the ID correct or do you just assume every brown spider is a recluse?


There were no smushed remains (and I never claimed any) the determination was made by the ER doc and State Epidemiologist. BR spiders are rare in Iowa, but they're here.

Soon.
 
2012-11-16 12:54:34 AM  
userserve-ak.last.fm

RIP SID VISCOUS
 
2012-11-16 12:57:27 AM  

insertsnarkyusername: Bumblefark: Have yet to find a black widow around here (TX) but my home is crawling with rabid wolf spiders (assuming that's what they are). While not the deadliest thing around, you'll certainly know when one has bitten you -- speaking from recent experience.

That was actually my favorite method of disposing of black widows. I actually liked the wolf spiders and would leave them alone except for the occasional gladiatorial match with a black widow. The black widows almost never won. The ones that did never survived the second round.

/I was bored a lot as kid.


Hmm...wonder if that's the reason why I'm not finding any black widows. Seriously, the place is just infested (crappy apartment), and I can certainly see how there really wouldn't be much of a competition between the two. To me at least, rather surprising how fast and strong the wolf spider is.
 
2012-11-16 01:02:10 AM  
What a black widow may look like
x.annihil.us
 
2012-11-16 01:05:00 AM  
We have tons of black widows in Las Vegas. I used to step on them, until I saw one eating one of those little yellow scorpions. Now I like them, and I encourage them to live in the garage. The thing about those spiders is, they build a web and stay in it, and you know right where they are. The scorpions, on the other hand, crawl around all over the place and get into your shoes. Spiders are definitely better than scorpions.
 
2012-11-16 01:06:06 AM  
Leaving lepidoptera - please, don't touch the display,
little boy, aha cute! Moving to the next aisle we have
arachnida, the spiders, our.. finest collection.
This friendly little devil is the heptothilidi,
unfortunately harmless. Next to him, the nasty licosa
raptoria. His tiny fangs cause creeping ulcerations of
the skin. And here, my prize, the Black Widow.
Isn't she lovely?.. and so deadly. Her kiss is
fifteen times as poisonous as that of the rattlesnake.
You see her venom is highly neurotoxic, which is to say
that it attacks the central nervous system, causing
intense pain, profuse sweating, difficulty in
breathing, loss of consciousness, violent convulsions
and, finally.. death. You know what I think I love the
most about her is her inborn need to dominate,
possess. In fact, immediately after the consummation
of her marriage to the smaller and weaker male of the
species she kills and eats him - oh, she is
delicious!... and I hope he was. Such power and dignity
- unhampered by sentiment. If I may put forward a
slice of personal philosophy, I feel that man has ruled
this world as a stumbling demented child-king, long
enough! And as his empire crumbles, my precious Black
Widow, shall rise, as his most fitting successor!
 
2012-11-16 01:07:07 AM  

Prof. Frink: There are blacks in Texas?


Just the ones who murdered their husbands.
 
2012-11-16 01:07:27 AM  

Dinjiin: Black Widow spiders are common around here. They like to make their nests on the inside corners of my house's exterior. The webs are very irregular and are annoying because they tend to pick up a lot of debris and are unsightly.

So during their peak season, I take a flashlight and a shoe and walk the perimeter of the house just after dark when they've come out. I crush all the spiders I see. I think my record was to crush 15 BWs and three scorpions in one night. I generally leave the tarantulas alone unless they get into the house (only happened once).


/have never found a BW inside the house
//effing scorpions love to come inside, though


Where do you live exactly? I'm guessing somewhere in the southwest US? I ask because I am contemplating movies to the Texas/Arizona area for a job and I HATE spiders....is your post something I can look forward to?
 
2012-11-16 01:08:21 AM  

vossiewulf: Easy there Brits. Having lived 40+ years right smack dab in black widow territory, you have to work really hard to get bitten. If you spend lots of time climbing around under houses in crawl spaces you might want to carry some bug spray with you but otherwise don't sweat it.


I've only seen them when walking along railroad tracks--they had nests along the gravel and wooden beams. My uncle's shed supposedly was infested, but I never went close enough to find out. fark spiders.
 
2012-11-16 01:11:02 AM  
files.abovetopsecret.com
 
2012-11-16 01:12:25 AM  
I just wanna say that we are now 50+ posts into a spider thread and no one has posted the usual creepy spider pictures (clock spider, toilet paper spider, etc). Normally I would be disappoint, But in this case, it warms my heart. Thank you for sparing us so far.
 
2012-11-16 01:13:15 AM  

Smeggy Smurf: vossiewulf: Easy there Brits. Having lived 40+ years right smack dab in black widow territory, you have to work really hard to get bitten. If you spend lots of time climbing around under houses in crawl spaces you might want to carry some bug spray with you but otherwise don't sweat it.

Yup. They're really easy to live with. Just don't poke them or their next.

The hobo spider on the other hand will charge 4-6 feet just to bite you because fark you that's why.


And you own my inevitable nightmares tonight. Thanks.
 
2012-11-16 01:13:30 AM  

WeenerGord: [files.abovetopsecret.com image 640x512]


God damn it. I spoke 1 post too soon. Fark you sir. And bravo.
 
2012-11-16 01:15:15 AM  
Where'd they find a deadly one, Mr. Mel O'Drama?
 
2012-11-16 01:16:46 AM  
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2012-11-16 01:18:11 AM  
Aaaaaaand I'm done with this thread.
 
2012-11-16 01:24:47 AM  

taurusowner: WeenerGord: [files.abovetopsecret.com image 640x512]

God damn it. I spoke 1 post too soon. Fark you sir. And bravo.


I didn't even need to check the time stamps here.
 
2012-11-16 01:25:33 AM  

taurusowner: toilet paper spider,


LOL I never heard of that one! Fortunately Google is my friend

www.majhost.com

annnnd

i.ytimg.com
 
2012-11-16 01:28:31 AM  
Just one more

www.popfi.com
 
2012-11-16 01:32:50 AM  
Charlotte?
 
2012-11-16 01:37:54 AM  

Smeggy Smurf: vossiewulf: Easy there Brits. Having lived 40+ years right smack dab in black widow territory, you have to work really hard to get bitten. If you spend lots of time climbing around under houses in crawl spaces you might want to carry some bug spray with you but otherwise don't sweat it.

Yup. They're really easy to live with. Just don't poke them or their next.

The hobo spider on the other hand will charge 4-6 feet just to bite you because fark you that's why.


Hobo spiders are aggressive, but most of their bites are dry (no venom). They don't like to waste it as they need it for their food. Unless your trapping it in some way and make it feel like it's about to die you'll likely get little to no venom.

I've known a couple people who've been bit and the only one who ended up with what looks like a recluse bite (recluse and hobo spiders have the same type of venom) was my idiot friend who deserves a Darwin award for picking up a hobo spider he found then lays down and starts farking with it while it's on his bare chest. He ended up getting bit near his diaphragm and within an hour or 2 had a massive baseball size lump in the bite location. He ended up spending a few days in the hospital and had a huge hole in his abdomen that gushed with disgusting green and pink puss he had to drain every couple hours and stuff with tons of gauze.
 
2012-11-16 01:39:46 AM  
img.photobucket.com 

I remember seeing one of these giant mats of daddy long legs (harvestman) spiders as a kid, on the porch at my grandma's house. Fascinating AND scary.
They'd start moving and then the whole mass "danced" together.
 
2012-11-16 01:46:24 AM  

dopeydwarf: Vicious spider? They're scared to death of coming in contact with you, they run away from a gentle breeze. And deadly? Maybe to a baby or a very old person. What happened to the stiff upper lip, Britain?

Oh and all spiders are venomous, you Daily Fail knobs. You mean poisonous to humans. 

/Loves spiders.


Not quite all.
 
2012-11-16 01:49:33 AM  

WeenerGord: [upload.wikimedia.org image 800x600]


Did you ... did you just tip that spider a dollar?
 
2012-11-16 01:56:38 AM  

Blue_Blazer: farkin hell, I am not moving to where you live. My skin is crawling just reading that.


Everyone is all worked up about the spiders, but the scorpions are the critters you have to worry about. They can crawl up walls and I assume they can crawl on ceilings. Which means that they could drop onto your bed. Not that they'd need to since they can crawl up the legs (there are special scorpion blocks you can buy for the legs of your bed or baby's crib).

I also heard a rumor (probably false) that mama scorpions carry their brood on their backs. So if you squish a mama scorpion in your house, the babies will run off in every direction. Dozens of them. In your house. It is why I use the dyson to suck up the little bastards whenever I see them in the house so I can dump the canister outside.

The worst part is that standard insecticides do not kill scorpions. The chemicals it takes to kill them are lethal to us. So except to spray them with this toxic stuff or to physically destroy them, the only way to deal with scorpions is to kill off their food supply (other bugs) so they'll move on.

But hey, it is mid November and it is going to be 78F/25C and sunny tomorrow, so this place isn't all bad. 


/sleep well
 
2012-11-16 01:58:30 AM  

Oznog: [img.photobucket.com image 500x625] 

I remember seeing one of these giant mats of daddy long legs (harvestman) spiders as a kid, on the porch at my grandma's house. Fascinating AND scary.
They'd start moving and then the whole mass "danced" together.


Well, off to bed now -- I'm sure this will in no way haunt my dreams, tonight and every night thereafter.

Cheers.
 
2012-11-16 01:59:08 AM  

WeenerGord: Leaving lepidoptera - please, don't touch the display,
little boy, aha cute! Moving to the next aisle we have
arachnida, the spiders, our.. finest collection.
This friendly little devil is the heptothilidi,
unfortunately harmless. Next to him, the nasty licosa
raptoria. His tiny fangs cause creeping ulcerations of
the skin. And here, my prize, the Black Widow.
Isn't she lovely?.. and so deadly. Her kiss is
fifteen times as poisonous as that of the rattlesnake.
You see her venom is highly neurotoxic, which is to say
that it attacks the central nervous system, causing
intense pain, profuse sweating, difficulty in
breathing, loss of consciousness, violent convulsions
and, finally.. death. You know what I think I love the
most about her is her inborn need to dominate,
possess. In fact, immediately after the consummation
of her marriage to the smaller and weaker male of the
species she kills and eats him - oh, she is
delicious!... and I hope he was. Such power and dignity
- unhampered by sentiment. If I may put forward a
slice of personal philosophy, I feel that man has ruled
this world as a stumbling demented child-king, long
enough! And as his empire crumbles, my precious Black
Widow, shall rise, as his most fitting successor!


Came for the Alice Cooper ref, left satisfied. (As to "heptothilidi", that's apparently an odd rendering of Hypochilidae or the lampshade spider genus (all of which are harmless, beneficial, and quite primitive true spiders); Lycosa raptoria is the Brazilian wolf spider (which has been accused of causing symptoms with envenomation similar to brown recluse bites and even systemic effects, but the "tarantellism" blamed on L. tarantula (no close relation to the big hairy South American spiders) turned out to be from the Mediterranean black widow or thirteen-spotted widow and the parts of Brazil where Lycosa raptoria lives are in the northern range of the Chilean recluse which does cause systemic effects and has necrotic venom--so it could be mistaken identity). Yes, not only do black widows themselves show up, but at least one cousin to a spider whose supposedly dangerous bite turned out to be actually from a cousin of the black widow.)

And as others have noted, out of the two Spiders Of Medical Concern in the US, the black widow is actually the easier of the two to get along with--very distinctive (unlike brown recluses which can be confused for "little brown job" house spiders), actually not all that aggressive (you pretty much have to accidentally squish them or handle them roughly and piss them off...rather like gila monsters) and (again, unlike brown recluse spiders) there has been an effective antivenom for black widow bites for decades for those few populations for which a black widow bite is actually a medical emergency (rather than "you'll feel shiatty for a few days").

Americans are pretty much patting Brits on the head and reminding them that Europe has a number of native widow spider species (in fact, most of the documented widow species are European), at least one of which is considered to be more medically significant than our mere little black widows. We also gently remind them to be thankful that they weren't infested with brown recluses.

Australians pretty much laugh, remind Brits that their least medically significant spider is essentially an Oz black widow (the (in)famous redback spider) whilst pointing out the funnelbacks in the backyard that can kill a man in thirty minutes without medical treatment (oh, and the government is now encouraging people to catch and milk these "make a black widow seem tame" critters because they're running out of antivenom and need funnelback venom to produce more antivenom...oh, and did I mention funnelbacks were quite aggressive spiders that will actively chase humans?). They will then tell you to man up after playing a happy traditional Australian country song about redbacks on the toilet seat and the hilarity that ensues.
 
2012-11-16 02:00:48 AM  

ciberido: WeenerGord: [upload.wikimedia.org image 800x600]

Did you ... did you just tip that spider a dollar?



He gets a dollar bounty for every stray dog or Jehovah's Witness he catches
 
2012-11-16 02:05:34 AM  

Dinjiin: (there are special scorpion blocks you can buy for the legs of your bed or baby's crib).

You can use mayonaise jars as well. What's really fun, is that one of the only species in the world that can actually climb is the one that can put a good hurt on you. Not only are they able to climb, they prefer being inverted (look up negative geotaxis).


I also heard a rumor (probably false) that mama scorpions carry their brood on their backs.
Nope, it's true. I've seen it. Though. if you come down straight on top, you probably will end up squishing the babies too. Wolf spiders do the same thing (enjoy!). Spray and/or glue traps will take care of that though.


The worst part is that standard insecticides do not kill scorpions. The chemicals it takes to kill them are lethal to us. So except to spray them with this toxic stuff or to physically destroy them, the only way to deal with scorpions is to kill off their food supply (other bugs) so they'll move on.

I'm not sure about that. I've heard different things from different bug guys and it's hard to say if it really kills them or just their food source.

Luckily, the scorps have an achilles heel; their wicked cool black-light glow.vvLast summer, I went out 3 times a week and killed 5-6 every time. They love cinder block walls.

I think due to diligence last year of just killing the bastards, caulking the block walls, and heavy spraying this year, the number was down to a mere fraction of that.

 
2012-11-16 02:06:02 AM  

Bumblefark: Well, off to bed now -- I'm sure this will in no way haunt my dreams, tonight and every night thereafter.


Bed?
img236.imageshack.us
You're right. It's getting late.
 
2012-11-16 02:07:10 AM  

Oznog: [img.photobucket.com image 500x625] 

I remember seeing one of these giant mats of daddy long legs (harvestman) spiders as a kid, on the porch at my grandma's house. Fascinating AND scary.
They'd start moving and then the whole mass "danced" together.


www.bugemporium.com
I'm sorry, did you say "dancing spider"?
 
2012-11-16 02:10:06 AM  

Dinjiin: Blue_Blazer: farkin hell, I am not moving to where you live. My skin is crawling just reading that.

Everyone is all worked up about the spiders, but the scorpions are the critters you have to worry about. They can crawl up walls and I assume they can crawl on ceilings. Which means that they could drop onto your bed. Not that they'd need to since they can crawl up the legs (there are special scorpion blocks you can buy for the legs of your bed or baby's crib).

I also heard a rumor (probably false) that mama scorpions carry their brood on their backs. So if you squish a mama scorpion in your house, the babies will run off in every direction. Dozens of them. In your house. It is why I use the dyson to suck up the little bastards whenever I see them in the house so I can dump the canister outside.

The worst part is that standard insecticides do not kill scorpions. The chemicals it takes to kill them are lethal to us. So except to spray them with this toxic stuff or to physically destroy them, the only way to deal with scorpions is to kill off their food supply (other bugs) so they'll move on.

But hey, it is mid November and it is going to be 78F/25C and sunny tomorrow, so this place isn't all bad. 

/sleep well


Ah, scorpions...the one arachnid I am thankful does NOT commonly get into people's houses here in KY (yes, we do have scorpions in the state, but usually they're polite enough to stay in rocky areas and woods and NOT in people's homes or especially their shoes).

Pretty much in our neck of the woods that role seems to be replaced by centipedes, and whilst I don't mind the little ones, once they get about 4-5 inches including leg tips (and where you can see their little centipede eyes and banding very well) they go a bit to the "creepy" side of things. Again, though, they do keep other bugs out, and as long as there's not food for them around we don't usually see them.

/and as for jumping spiders--these are overtly encouraged, and wish we had more occasionally making their way inside. Nature's teeny tiny Tachikomas are always welcome ;3
 
2012-11-16 02:12:41 AM  

vossiewulf: Easy there Brits. Having lived 40+ years right smack dab in black widow territory, you have to work really hard to get bitten. If you spend lots of time climbing around under houses in crawl spaces you might want to carry some bug spray with you but otherwise don't sweat it.


lived here 20 years. never seen one even.
 
2012-11-16 02:13:56 AM  

taurusowner: I'm guessing somewhere in the southwest US?


Yup.

But honestly, the Black Windows are more a nuisance than anything. Never seen one in the house and rarely see them in the garage. The tarantula probably came into the house when I had the door to the garage open to bring in groceries. Boy, was it pissed when I came near it with the extension wand to the dyson. Got up on its hind legs and started striking its forearms at me. In hindsight, I kinda wish I had just put some gloves and a long-sleeved sweatshirt on and tried to capture it. But the wife discovered it and was freaking out. Never been bit by a spider living down here, BTW.

My spider bite scar comes from what I assume was a wolf spider. Got it when I lived way up north. Bastard got me while I was sleeping. It didn't hurt, but it was really tender for a few days. Looked like a giant zit with inflamed skin around it. Took about 3 weeks to heal.
 
2012-11-16 02:16:32 AM  

ciberido: Bumblefark: Well, off to bed now -- I'm sure this will in no way haunt my dreams, tonight and every night thereafter.

Bed?
[img236.imageshack.us image 480x424]
You're right. It's getting late.


1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-11-16 02:21:49 AM  

Dinjiin: taurusowner: I'm guessing somewhere in the southwest US?

Yup.

But honestly, the Black Windows are more a nuisance than anything. Never seen one in the house and rarely see them in the garage. The tarantula probably came into the house when I had the door to the garage open to bring in groceries. Boy, was it pissed when I came near it with the extension wand to the dyson. Got up on its hind legs and started striking its forearms at me. In hindsight, I kinda wish I had just put some gloves and a long-sleeved sweatshirt on and tried to capture it. But the wife discovered it and was freaking out. Never been bit by a spider living down here, BTW.

My spider bite scar comes from what I assume was a wolf spider. Got it when I lived way up north. Bastard got me while I was sleeping. It didn't hurt, but it was really tender for a few days. Looked like a giant zit with inflamed skin around it. Took about 3 weeks to heal.


Well, if I do move a Taurus Judge and some .410 shotshells will probably be handy whenever I'm doing outdoorsy stuff. No capturing for me.
 
2012-11-16 02:23:46 AM  

kidgenius: Luckily, the scorps have an achilles heel; their wicked cool black-light glow. Last summer, I went out 3 times a week and killed 5-6 every time. They love cinder block walls.


Our local Home Depot has a display cage over by the pest control section with scorpions in it. Push a button and a blacklight comes on so you can see them crawling around inside.

I probably should invest in a blacklight wand at some point so I can add them to my outdoor hunt. Besides the concrete blocks, they also like to hide under the crushed landscaping rock in the yard, especially if they're larger sized stones that create lots of pockets for them to hide in.
 
2012-11-16 02:24:16 AM  
I say, I appear to have been bitten by a deadly black widow. That's damned inconvenient.
 
OKO
2012-11-16 02:26:57 AM  
A third rate spider makes it to the Country where the locals are pathologically afraid of spiders, insects, and good teeth. No wonder they lost the war. Wait, what ...?
 
2012-11-16 02:27:09 AM  
Black Widow's bite reported to be 15 times stronger than a rattlesnake's

Who decides this, really? Do we have test groups, one which receives a black widow's bite, the other gets 5, 10, 15, or 20 rattlesnake bites, and a placebo which just gets pinched?
 
2012-11-16 02:29:15 AM  

Dinjiin: Blue_Blazer: farkin hell, I am not moving to where you live. My skin is crawling just reading that.

Everyone is all worked up about the spiders, but the scorpions are the critters you have to worry about. They can crawl up walls and I assume they can crawl on ceilings. Which means that they could drop onto your bed. Not that they'd need to since they can crawl up the legs (there are special scorpion blocks you can buy for the legs of your bed or baby's crib).

I also heard a rumor (probably false) that mama scorpions carry their brood on their backs. So if you squish a mama scorpion in your house, the babies will run off in every direction. Dozens of them. In your house. It is why I use the dyson to suck up the little bastards whenever I see them in the house so I can dump the canister outside.

The worst part is that standard insecticides do not kill scorpions. The chemicals it takes to kill them are lethal to us. So except to spray them with this toxic stuff or to physically destroy them, the only way to deal with scorpions is to kill off their food supply (other bugs) so they'll move on.


Why not get a Honey Badger? They're badass!
 
2012-11-16 02:29:19 AM  

Bumblefark: ciberido: Bumblefark: Well, off to bed now -- I'm sure this will in no way haunt my dreams, tonight and every night thereafter.

Bed?
[img236.imageshack.us image 480x424]
You're right. It's getting late.

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 390x291]


Oh, sorry.
0-media-cdn.foolz.us
Good night.
4.bp.blogspot.com
Sleep tight. 
www.stikiart.co.uk
Don't let the ... bedbugs bite.
 
2012-11-16 02:29:33 AM  

vossiewulf: Easy there Brits. Having lived 40+ years right smack dab in black widow territory, you have to work really hard to get bitten. If you spend lots of time climbing around under houses in crawl spaces you might want to carry some bug spray with you but otherwise don't sweat it.


What the fark kind of 'bug spray' are YOU using. The vicious (and viscous) farks shrug off bug spray like I would a squirt gun blast. Even the shiat that's supposedly made to kill spiders just pisses 'em off.
 
2012-11-16 02:31:31 AM  

Great Porn Dragon: and NOT in people's homes or especially their shoes


Oh yeah, you're not supposed to leave your shoes outside around here for that reason. Same with gloves. You have to check for scorpions before you put them on if you do leave them out.

Again, did I mention that it is supposed to be sunny with high temps in the mid 70s F / mid 20s C for the next two weeks and it is almost winter? Just in case anyone was wondering why I'd move to (and remain at) a place like this.
 
2012-11-16 02:37:18 AM  

ciberido: Oznog: [img.photobucket.com image 500x625] 

I remember seeing one of these giant mats of daddy long legs (harvestman) spiders as a kid, on the porch at my grandma's house. Fascinating AND scary.
They'd start moving and then the whole mass "danced" together.

[www.bugemporium.com image 143x143]
I'm sorry, did you say "dancing spider"?


i50.tinypic.com

Stile4aly: I say, I appear to have been bitten by a deadly black widow. That's damned inconvenient.


Bob's your uncle, that is a spot of bother.
 
2012-11-16 02:46:17 AM  
FTFA: Black Widow's bite reported to be 15 times stronger than a rattlesnake's

Yeah, it's reported to be so, but the ones reporting it are the Daily Fail.

/The Australian redback, though...
 
2012-11-16 02:49:54 AM  
zombierobots.net
 
2012-11-16 02:55:31 AM  

Dinjiin: Great Porn Dragon: and NOT in people's homes or especially their shoes

Oh yeah, you're not supposed to leave your shoes outside around here for that reason. Same with gloves. You have to check for scorpions before you put them on if you do leave them out.

Again, did I mention that it is supposed to be sunny with high temps in the mid 70s F / mid 20s C for the next two weeks and it is almost winter? Just in case anyone was wondering why I'd move to (and remain at) a place like this.


Have had friends who lived out West who've told me about the ritual of shaking out shoes when going camping, hence that mention. Apparently scorpions like being stepped on even less so than spiders do...

(And yes, I'm certain the weather is lovely, but I'll take 32 degrees/0C over having cantankerous and stingy land-shrimp making their way into my shoes. :D Areas that have scorpions are probably lovely to visit, as long as you avoid the derpy parts...on the other hand, I've not yet had to worry about shoe invasions by centipedes or any other arachnids. Advantages and disadvantages to everything, I suppose...)

Oh, and yes, babby scorpions do hang out on mom's back--even the teensy ones in Kentucky that mostly hang out around creeks (well, if two inches including the tail is "teeny"--I've not ever personally seen the things; we have POLITE scorpions here, apparently) hang out on their mom's back, if the ag extension's website is anything to go by.

/got enough stingy stuff around here--really really really hope Japanese hornets never make it here to this part of the world...three or four inches of giant perpetually-cranky yellow jacket from hell
//and those are prolly the one actual venomous arthropod aside from brown recluses and siafu that give me the hooboojeebies and NOT in a good way
 
2012-11-16 03:05:43 AM  

Lee Jackson Beauregard: FTFA: Black Widow's bite reported to be 15 times stronger than a rattlesnake's

Yeah, it's reported to be so, but the ones reporting it are the Daily Fail.

/The Australian redback, though...


...is actually only about as venomous as the black widow, it's just that typical spider bite treatment in Oz involves antivenom as a rule and redbacks have a habit of accidentally getting into places people live...with toilet seats being particularly infamous (as noted in a certain Australian country song). Most redback bites occur (again, much as was noted in a certain Australian country song) when people accidentally sit on them or smush them.

(And compared with the other venomous spiders in Australia, redbacks are mild in comparison. One word: Funnelwebs.)

Of course, there IS a pretty good way to keep redbacks out of the home...unfortunately for most Farkers, that way involves the explicit invitation of Clocky the Spider and his friend Toilet-Roll Spider into the home. (Clocky and friends are huge, but actually mostly harmless to humans...other than the occasional heart attack induced, I'm sure.)

/then again, were Australia its own planet it would be classified as a death world...
//and New Zealand is a veritable Hobbiton to the Mordor that is Australia ...seriously, only one creature exists that is potentially dangerous to humans...that being the katipo or New Zealand widow, which is actually an endangered species due to habitat loss.
///The Maori pretty much ate one of the other potentially dangerous-to-humans critters into extinction (the moa, which probably could have kicked humans into submission) which starved to extinction the one predator on the island that could have really preyed on young humans (a giant eagle...that fed on young moa).
 
2012-11-16 03:07:22 AM  

Great Porn Dragon: but I'll take 32 degrees/0C over having cantankerous and stingy land-shrimp making their way into my shoes


Fair enough. But at least we don't have ticks out here. Scorpion stings may hurt like the bejeusus, but at least they don't transmit Lyme disease and there is zero chance their head will be left embedded in your skin.
 
2012-11-16 03:09:16 AM  

HotWingAgenda: When I was an infant, my parents kept my crib in a corner directly under a black widow's nest.

And I do mean kept, because mommy dearest has verified several times that she intentionally left it there after the nest appeared.


the fark?
 
2012-11-16 03:12:18 AM  
ftfa: Engineers at the plant discovered the notoriously viscous spider

I bet the ooze did this!
 
2012-11-16 03:13:58 AM  

Dinjiin: Great Porn Dragon: but I'll take 32 degrees/0C over having cantankerous and stingy land-shrimp making their way into my shoes

Fair enough. But at least we don't have ticks out here. Scorpion stings may hurt like the bejeusus, but at least they don't transmit Lyme disease and there is zero chance their head will be left embedded in your skin.


...ok, fair enough. :D (Even worse with Lyme is that the deer ticks that cause it are teensy, hard to see--a trick I've used in past is to tape the tops of boots to pants with double-sided tape (taping the tops of pants to socks works too, and both can work if you're extra paranoid...I've also heard of folks making deer tick traps using the same principle of double-sided tape and dry ice but I don't know how well that'd work).

And yeah, Lyme sucks--do know someone who had chronic (undiagnosed) Lyme, now they have Lyme arthritis from it :P
 
2012-11-16 03:30:23 AM  

Isildur: HotWingAgenda: When I was an infant, my parents kept my crib in a corner directly under a black widow's nest.

And I do mean kept, because mommy dearest has verified several times that she intentionally left it there after the nest appeared.

the fark?


gerber life insurance policy
 
2012-11-16 03:36:42 AM  

Oznog: Black Widow's bite reported to be 15 times stronger than a rattlesnake's

Who decides this, really? Do we have test groups, one which receives a black widow's bite, the other gets 5, 10, 15, or 20 rattlesnake bites, and a placebo which just gets pinched?


The historical way people have compared venom toxicity is a median lethal dose test (LD50). So what they are comparing is the amount of venom it takes to kill 50% of mice when injected. While a black widow may not be more dangerous than a rattlesnake, the toxicity drop for drop is far greater...which shouldn't surprise anyone since the amount of venom injected from a spider bite is going to be absolutely miniscule.
 
2012-11-16 03:45:40 AM  

Oznog: Black Widow's bite reported to be 15 times stronger than a rattlesnake's

Who decides this, really? Do we have test groups, one which receives a black widow's bite, the other gets 5, 10, 15, or 20 rattlesnake bites, and a placebo which just gets pinched?


They get a rattlesnake and let it kill a mouse. Then they see how many mice of equal size one black widow can kill. In this case, it was 15, ergo, a black widow is 15 times deadlier than a rattlesnake. In the case of a cobra, from what I hear, a widow is only about 2x deadlier, i.e. a widow can only kill two mice for every mouse a cobra can kill; whereas the funnel-web spider is 193 times deadlier than a black widow (for every mouse a widow can kill, that Australian monster can kill 193 mice), and so forth.

Now, I realize that would mean a funnel-web spider is 2895 times deadlier than a rattlesnake, which should be impossible, but remember it does come from Australia, so you're justified in killing them as often as possible and never going near Australia as much as you can.
 
2012-11-16 03:55:03 AM  
This thread is the closest I come to immersion therapy in dealing with my arachnophobia. I won't even take the garbage out in the dark after I found a black widow living in the lid.
 
2012-11-16 04:14:59 AM  
This is my fav spider picture.


officialmagicpg.com

It is something a doctor found while looking in a woman's ear canal.

Apparently this is a problem that is becoming quite common.
 
2012-11-16 04:29:51 AM  
They aren't deadly really..... bites from large ones have been known to kill 3 year old children and younger. But that takes an extra large one which isn't common at all. Kids older than that and to adults will just get a nasty welt and possibly come down with some common cold type symptoms.

They are a nasty spider, but they are solitary and do not "infest" anymore than any other spider.

(Spider eggs tend to release 500 baby spiders into the world, most of them die, that goes for pretty much all spiders)

So basically... DO NOT FREAK OUT ENGLAND..... we have had them here in the U.S forever and they don't cause any significant problems.
 
2012-11-16 04:31:38 AM  
Vicious black widow spider...

I'm glad everyone else in the thread is pointing out the very idea is laughable. I've got a black widow living in my window (in a nice big jar!) and she's profoundly timid... they're so unbalanced that it's hard for them to even move quickly or with any agility when they're not on their web, and their inclination to attack something actively poking them (an allen wrench when I was giving her a fresh jar) is pretty much limited to trying to slow it with capture silk. You've practically got to try to get them to bite you, and pretty hard at that.

It's sure fun to watch her rock some insects though. Yellow jackets are her biatches, and she can take down cockroaches much larger than her.
 
2012-11-16 04:48:41 AM  
That's why I live in canada....the really poisonous ones can and do live here, but it's much less commonplace than the states.
Much more likely to die from the effects of Canadian winter.
 
2012-11-16 06:19:17 AM  

WeenerGord: ciberido: WeenerGord: [upload.wikimedia.org image 800x600]

Did you ... did you just tip that spider a dollar?


He gets a dollar bounty for every stray dog or Jehovah's Witness he catches


Oh, I had thought the spider had just finished mugging you.
 
2012-11-16 06:22:18 AM  
Why do I always click on this shiat before I go to bed? It's like looking at car accident, for me, I MUST LOOK at every farking spider picture before I slowly back out of the thread.
 
2012-11-16 06:31:17 AM  
Not concerned:

www.movieimages.org
 
2012-11-16 07:23:00 AM  
YEE HAW!!

images2.wikia.nocookie.net

TEXAS!!
 
2012-11-16 07:23:55 AM  
Many years ago, in Vegas, helping grandpa clean out and move his shed in the courtyard of his condo.

get under it finally & he wants to flip it over to "spray"

"spray what grandpa?"

"you'll see"

we roll the shed to a side and between, over, under, all around the floor joists of the shed are webs, black widows, & egg sacs.

Not just a few egg sacs... I'm talking 2-5 eggs per webbing area. Now, knowing that 1 egg sacs can produce 1,000s of new, fresh... ready to fark you up black widows, I didn't like what I saw.

Fast forward to a few years ago I started renting this condo grandpa had after he passed away. & yes, the black widows were STILL running the show in the back courtyard. Basterds were every.where. I sprayed a good 2-3 times a week & I'd still find baby spiders that morphed into those black coonts

Only 2 spiders really, really bother me. Black Widows (I've seen what their bites can do) & Fiddleback (Brown Recluse)... most deadly in the US & unlike Black Widow bites, you cannot feel a brown recluse bite until it gets inflamed & starts eating your flesh.

25.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-11-16 07:55:59 AM  

vegasj: Now, knowing that 1 egg sacs can produce 1,000s of new, fresh


?1 egg sacs? is this possible....

Answer:

A female Black Widow Spider can produce four to nine egg sacs in one summer, each containing about 100-400 eggs.

1 egg sac - tops 400

3 egg sacs - closer to a thousand

killed one this afternoon before coming into work. probably a male, cause was pretty small and dull in color.
 
2012-11-16 08:03:14 AM  
Good. Fark those people. I'm still pissed about the unfair taxes King George levied on us.
 
2012-11-16 08:21:16 AM  

Dinjiin: kidgenius: Luckily, the scorps have an achilles heel; their wicked cool black-light glow. Last summer, I went out 3 times a week and killed 5-6 every time. They love cinder block walls.

Our local Home Depot has a display cage over by the pest control section with scorpions in it. Push a button and a blacklight comes on so you can see them crawling around inside.

I probably should invest in a blacklight wand at some point so I can add them to my outdoor hunt. Besides the concrete blocks, they also like to hide under the crushed landscaping rock in the yard, especially if they're larger sized stones that create lots of pockets for them to hide in.


Just get a UV led flashlight. $20 and you are set. I also recommend caulking the main columns of the cinder block walls. Will help to keep them from coming into your yard. It really does help cut down the ways they get in your yard. And you can buy tan/gray caulk that blends in. From five feet away you can't even see it.
 
2012-11-16 08:43:58 AM  
BUT WAIT THERES MORE....
if that is a real picture of the egg
then its a BROWN WIDOW
and their venom is twice that of a black widow

brown eggs have little spikes on them blacks are smooth
 
2012-11-16 08:56:11 AM  

Captain James T. Smirk: Sherman Potter: Captain James T. Smirk: As someone who has been bitten by both a Black Widow and a Brown Recluse, I can safely say "Quit your goddamned whining, England."

Seriously though, these aren't exactly the most dangerous thing we've exported to the United Kingdom. As I recall, Plaxico Burress played a game there once.

B.S. without pics. Nobody gets bit by a Brown Recluse and doesn't take pictures of the extruded sausage hamburger that results.

/I've seen it.
//It ain't pretty
///Iowa

I got bit on the arm while I was at Fort Jackson, SC. The Drill Sergeants had a pre-arranged plan for recluse bites, even though they were rare and even though necrosis from a recluse bite happens less than half of the time. About fifteen seconds after I got bit, slapped my arm, saw the remains of a recluse, and said "Oh, shiat", I was on a truck on the way to the base hospital, and within ten minutes I was getting my arm washed down with about thirty different soaps and being needled full of all kinds of meds. Ended up with nothing but a normal-looking, tiny spider bite that went away in a couple of days.


Nothing but a tiny, normal looking bite?

That's total BS.

We all know about your newfound spider-powers.
 
2012-11-16 09:06:15 AM  

This Face Left Blank: vossiewulf: Easy there Brits. Having lived 40+ years right smack dab in black widow territory, you have to work really hard to get bitten. If you spend lots of time climbing around under houses in crawl spaces you might want to carry some bug spray with you but otherwise don't sweat it.

What the fark kind of 'bug spray' are YOU using. The vicious (and viscous) farks shrug off bug spray like I would a squirt gun blast. Even the shiat that's supposedly made to kill spiders just pisses 'em off.


Don't use poison...use spraypaint or really powerful hairspray...freezes the little farks in their tracks. Did that to one in my garage a few years back and left it to serve as an example to others. Thing is still there where i left it...lol
 
2012-11-16 09:09:29 AM  
sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net

I'm coming for your tea and crumpets.

/found outside my house a few years ago, if she was there the next day I was going to buy a terrarium and bring her inside :)
 
2012-11-16 09:42:05 AM  

Dinjiin: //effing scorpions love to come inside, though


at least they eat cockroaches
 
2012-11-16 09:44:58 AM  

WeenerGord: [upload.wikimedia.org image 800x600]


Tarantulas are like the bumblebees of the spider world. So large that they tend towards docility.
 
2012-11-16 09:58:49 AM  
I'm still trying to figure out what "ele4ctric" is.
 
2012-11-16 10:15:21 AM  
i.usatoday.net
 
2012-11-16 10:35:37 AM  

Saberus Terras: WeenerGord: ciberido: WeenerGord: [upload.wikimedia.org image 800x600]

Did you ... did you just tip that spider a dollar?

He gets a dollar bounty for every stray dog or Jehovah's Witness he catches

Oh, I had thought the spider had just finished mugging you.



Is that what you thought? I thought you thought that I had tipped the spida a dolla for it's having done a striptease act for me.
 
2012-11-16 10:43:55 AM  
 
2012-11-16 10:44:41 AM  
I've lived in this particular spot for 7 years and they can be found everywhere outside where a spider might hide. Under the deck, in the shed, pretty much any container-like object that's turned in a way to block the light. Except for when it's too cold, I guarantee I could go outside and find you a black widow in 30 seconds or less. Even then I could show you endless webbing and old egg sacs. Interestingly though I've never found one inside. The only spider that's a constant presence inside are these weird guys that start spinning (not spinning a web but actually spinning around on their web) when threatened. I forget what they're called but they aren't dangerous to us, so I generally leave them be. Every once in awhile we get a jumping spider inside, which are also harmless, and pretty cool little creatures, so please leave them alone if you can. Sometimes they wave their arms in the air like they just don't care, or they're looking for a mate or something, I dunno.

www.scenicreflections.com
"Sup?"
 
2012-11-16 10:48:35 AM  
I've never seen a black widow in Texas, but have seen recluses. Black widows were pretty plentiful in California, but never saw a recluse there.
 
2012-11-16 10:50:41 AM  
 
2012-11-16 10:51:06 AM  
FTA: "'We cordoned off the area in the yard where the spider was discovered and created a ring of insecticide around it. We then used ele4ctric and petrol based foggers on the rest of the site.
'After the factory was closed last night we then sprayed the office areas with a water-based insecticide as well.
'We are now satisfied that the premises is safe.'


No, there is only one way to be sure...
www.philippalmer.net
 
2012-11-16 11:35:57 AM  
Back-to-back sentences at the end of the article (emphasis is mine):

However, contrary to popular belief, most people who are bitten suffer no serious damage.
We have been called out for snakes, scorpions and spiders before but never in the past 24 years for one of these deadly creatures.


Nice reporting there!
 
2012-11-16 01:29:51 PM  

ISO15693: This is my fav spider picture.


[officialmagicpg.com image 400x358]

It is something a doctor found while looking in a woman's ear canal.

Apparently this is a problem that is becoming quite common.


You soulless bastard! I'm not afraid of spiders and that gave me a case of the MAJOR OOGIES!

I can and do actively murder those biatches whenever I find them, which I do very often. My son was bitten on the *tongue by one when he was 3, he got VERY ill very quickly and when I carried him into the Pediatricians office they took one look at him, rushed me into a room, the doc was in the room less than a minute later and immediately called an Ambulance to take him to the hospital BEFORE examining him! Doc rode in the Ambulance holding my son because he didn't know if he would make to to the hospital without CPR...He was very literally that close to dying!

After he was minutely examined in the hospital and every scrape, bruise, scab and mark evaluated and a couple of spots being tested they did find trace amounts of Black Widow venom in a lesion on his tongue!

*He had enlarged tonsils and adenoids and was an 'open mouth' breather when sleeping, before having them removed at six.

So yeah, I gleefully MURDERDEATHKILL those little Motherfarkers!
 
2012-11-16 01:32:41 PM  

relcec: Isildur: HotWingAgenda: When I was an infant, my parents kept my crib in a corner directly under a black widow's nest.

And I do mean kept, because mommy dearest has verified several times that she intentionally left it there after the nest appeared.

the fark?

gerber life insurance policy


Ha- but seriously, what the hell...
 
2012-11-16 01:35:36 PM  

OK So Amuse Me: ISO15693: This is my fav spider picture.


[officialmagicpg.com image 400x358]

It is something a doctor found while looking in a woman's ear canal.

Apparently this is a problem that is becoming quite common.

You soulless bastard! I'm not afraid of spiders and that gave me a case of the MAJOR OOGIES!

I can and do actively murder those biatches whenever I find them, which I do very often. My son was bitten on the *tongue by one when he was 3, he got VERY ill very quickly and when I carried him into the Pediatricians office they took one look at him, rushed me into a room, the doc was in the room less than a minute later and immediately called an Ambulance to take him to the hospital BEFORE examining him! Doc rode in the Ambulance holding my son because he didn't know if he would make to to the hospital without CPR...He was very literally that close to dying!

After he was minutely examined in the hospital and every scrape, bruise, scab and mark evaluated and a couple of spots being tested they did find trace amounts of Black Widow venom in a lesion on his tongue!

*He had enlarged tonsils and adenoids and was an 'open mouth' breather when sleeping, before having them removed at six.

So yeah, I gleefully MURDERDEATHKILL those little Motherfarkers!


*shudder* I'm glad he was ok in the end. That's farking scary.
 
2012-11-16 02:31:32 PM  

OK So Amuse Me: ISO15693: This is my fav spider picture.


[officialmagicpg.com image 400x358]

It is something a doctor found while looking in a woman's ear canal.

Apparently this is a problem that is becoming quite common.

You soulless bastard! I'm not afraid of spiders and that gave me a case of the MAJOR OOGIES!


Muahaha :)

Im glad to read about your son being okay though.

I once got bitten by some brown spider in Montana, and a chunk of flesh about the size of a quarter and deep as a dime eventually fell off, leaving a pit of oozy necrotizing yuck that took a year to heal. Never found out what it was - still have the scar.

But at least it wasnt laying eggs in my ear canal.
 
2012-11-16 02:37:08 PM  
i50.tinypic.com
 
2012-11-16 05:19:38 PM  

Great Porn Dragon: WeenerGord: Leaving lepidoptera - please, don't touch the display,
little boy, aha cute! Moving to the next aisle we have
arachnida, the spiders, our.. finest collection.
This friendly little devil is the heptothilidi,
unfortunately harmless. Next to him, the nasty licosa
raptoria. His tiny fangs cause creeping ulcerations of
the skin. And here, my prize, the Black Widow.
Isn't she lovely?.. and so deadly. Her kiss is
fifteen times as poisonous as that of the rattlesnake.
You see her venom is highly neurotoxic, which is to say
that it attacks the central nervous system, causing
intense pain, profuse sweating, difficulty in
breathing, loss of consciousness, violent convulsions
and, finally.. death. You know what I think I love the
most about her is her inborn need to dominate,
possess. In fact, immediately after the consummation
of her marriage to the smaller and weaker male of the
species she kills and eats him - oh, she is
delicious!... and I hope he was. Such power and dignity
- unhampered by sentiment. If I may put forward a
slice of personal philosophy, I feel that man has ruled
this world as a stumbling demented child-king, long
enough! And as his empire crumbles, my precious Black
Widow, shall rise, as his most fitting successor!

Came for the Alice Cooper ref, left satisfied. (As to "heptothilidi", that's apparently an odd rendering of Hypochilidae or the lampshade spider genus (all of which are harmless, beneficial, and quite primitive true spiders); Lycosa raptoria is the Brazilian wolf spider (which has been accused of causing symptoms with envenomation similar to brown recluse bites and even systemic effects, but the "tarantellism" blamed on L. tarantula (no close relation to the big hairy South American spiders) turned out to be from the Mediterranean black widow or thirteen-spotted widow and the parts of Brazil where Lycosa raptoria lives are in the northern range of the Chilean recluse which does cause systemic effects and has necrotic venom--so it c ...


I believe the correct term is Funnel Web,not funnel back. Doing a quick google search confirms that, or is funnel back Austrian?
 
2012-11-16 06:20:14 PM  

Dinjiin: I also heard a rumor (probably false) that mama scorpions carry their brood on their backs. So if you squish a mama scorpion in your house, the babies will run off in every direction. Dozens of them. In your house.


Like this?
animal.discovery.com
 
2012-11-16 06:28:01 PM  
ISO15693

Found the story: Link

Sleeping with earplugs from now on.

Weenergord, I hate you.
 
2012-11-16 06:28:50 PM  
www.whoaorno.com
 
2012-11-16 07:15:12 PM  

SearchN: I believe the correct term is Funnel Web,not funnel back. Doing a quick google search confirms that, or is funnel back Austrian?


Derp derp, my bad, this is what I get for posting in a nice safe spider thread at toodamnearly AM while trying to forget about the latest round of incendiary poop-slinging in the Levant :D
 
2012-11-16 07:28:39 PM  

Great Porn Dragon: SearchN: I believe the correct term is Funnel Web,not funnel back. Doing a quick google search confirms that, or is funnel back Austrian?

Derp derp, my bad, this is what I get for posting in a nice safe spider thread at toodamnearly AM while trying to forget about the latest round of incendiary poop-slinging in the Levant :D


All good. Just caught my attention and was wondering if it was slang or not.
 
2012-11-16 07:37:13 PM  

I want your skull: animal.discovery.com


Eeesh. That made me think of the mind-controlling eels from Wrath of Khan for some reason.
 
2012-11-16 07:50:22 PM  
Ah good. Nightmare fuel.
 
2012-11-16 08:28:03 PM  
images.travelpod.com
 
2012-11-16 08:59:29 PM  

MeanJean: Weenergord, I hate you.


Meanwhile, in your shower stall

ehspest.com


Haven't you heard about the roaches? They're devouring people whole!

media.tumblr.com
 
2012-11-16 10:43:20 PM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: [i50.tinypic.com image 288x288]


Hah! Although IIRC, some actually do have a percussive mating call. (No bongos, though. (Probably.))


ISO15693: [images.travelpod.com image 550x413]


The expression is priceless.
 
2012-11-17 02:38:26 AM  

ISO15693: OK So Amuse Me: ISO15693: This is my fav spider picture.


[officialmagicpg.com image 400x358]

It is something a doctor found while looking in a woman's ear canal.

Apparently this is a problem that is becoming quite common.

You soulless bastard! I'm not afraid of spiders and that gave me a case of the MAJOR OOGIES!


Muahaha :)

Im glad to read about your son being okay though.

I once got bitten by some brown spider in Montana, and a chunk of flesh about the size of a quarter and deep as a dime eventually fell off, leaving a pit of oozy necrotizing yuck that took a year to heal. Never found out what it was - still have the scar.

But at least it wasnt laying eggs in my ear canal.


I'm late to the party, as always... something similar happened to me a few years back in Wisconsin. I don't know what bit me, but I assume it was a spider. A spot swelled up a little smaller than half a golf ball or so. It itched like a motherfarker, and if I bumped it ever, it was painfull. I ended up getting some antibiotics, and it popped eventually. Some of the nastiest crap I've ever seen came out of that when it popped though. It still looks like there's a hole where it had been swollen.
 
2012-11-17 11:30:59 AM  
ISO15693

That is practically begging for a caption contest.
 
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