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(Chicago Sun-Times)   Roger Ebert on Breaking Dawn 2: "At the very least, the movie deserves credit for having a mother completely botch her daughter's name, confusing 'Renesmee' for the Loch Ness Monster"   (rogerebert.suntimes.com) divider line 89
    More: Amusing, Roger Ebert, renesmee  
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4656 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 15 Nov 2012 at 12:33 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-11-15 02:42:00 PM

Snapper Carr: "Renesmee"

Attention Twitards: In the unlikely and unfortunate event that you do spawn sometime in your future, before naming your future crotchfruit "Renesmee", please consider drowning it instead.


You'd be doing it a favor.


I think her mother is Rene and his mother is Esmee.

It could have been worse. With different mother's names she might have ended up stuck with Paulizabeth or Wilhelmickie.
 
2012-11-15 02:46:02 PM
Or Fredette.
 
2012-11-15 02:47:54 PM

Soulcatcher: Or Fredette.


Or Gertibeth.
 
2012-11-15 02:49:55 PM

Dalek Caan's doomed mistress: verbaltoxin: twat_waffle: Uzzah: To The Escape Zeppelin!: MysticSavage: SuperChuck: Big Beef Burrito: Polish Hussar: Great Janitor: Dr. Whoof: Flappyhead: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Millennium: TFA: Edward shows Bella their new honeymoon cottage, which unlike most brides, she decides is "perfect" even before looking inside. When she does, it's stocked with wall to wall books, and you'll never guess which one she eventually takes down from its shelf. Never ever.

50 Shades of Grey?

Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding?

Gibbons History of the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire?

The Necronomicon?

The first Twilight novel?

Everyone Poops?

Go, Dog, Go?

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter?

Blade, the graphic novel version?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips?

The 1967 greater metropolitan Memphis telephone directory and yellow pages?

The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion?

Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom?

Schindler's List?


Vampire: The Requiem For Dummies
 
2012-11-15 02:54:32 PM
Did anyone else think it's weird try choose the invading force to be North Koreans rather than the Chinese? I mean NK can barely feed it's own population and even with the 'lights off' weapon couldn't field enough soldiers to overwhelm the entire US armed forces, a lot of whom aren't even in the US. At least the Chinese are a seriously credible world power.
 
2012-11-15 03:09:53 PM

The Evil That Lies In The Hearts Of Men: Did anyone else think it's weird try choose the invading force to be North Koreans rather than the Chinese? I mean NK can barely feed it's own population and even with the 'lights off' weapon couldn't field enough soldiers to overwhelm the entire US armed forces, a lot of whom aren't even in the US. At least the Chinese are a seriously credible world power.


The US can't afford to make China mad, but China's ability to afford making the US mad is only slightly better. Trouble between the US and North Korea, as ridiculous as it sounds, is probably more plausible at the moment.
 
2012-11-15 03:11:26 PM

Soulcatcher: Snapper Carr: "Renesmee"

Attention Twitards: In the unlikely and unfortunate event that you do spawn sometime in your future, before naming your future crotchfruit "Renesmee", please consider drowning it instead.


You'd be doing it a favor.

I think her mother is Rene and his mother is Esmee.

It could have been worse. With different mother's names she might have ended up stuck with Paulizabeth or Wilhelmickie.


It's a very Utah Mormon thing to apparently. Ick.
 
2012-11-15 03:16:37 PM

The Evil That Lies In The Hearts Of Men: Did anyone else think it's weird try choose the invading force to be North Koreans rather than the Chinese? I mean NK can barely feed it's own population and even with the 'lights off' weapon couldn't field enough soldiers to overwhelm the entire US armed forces, a lot of whom aren't even in the US. At least the Chinese are a seriously credible world power.


China also have 1 billion people who LOVE American films. It's why there's not just a token black anymore there's also a token Asian in most films now. See: Thor and Captain America.
 
2012-11-15 03:17:16 PM
static.cinemagia.ro
images.wikia.com
 
2012-11-15 03:19:25 PM

The Evil That Lies In The Hearts Of Men: Did anyone else think it's weird try choose the invading force to be North Koreans rather than the Chinese? I mean NK can barely feed it's own population and even with the 'lights off' weapon couldn't field enough soldiers to overwhelm the entire US armed forces, a lot of whom aren't even in the US. At least the Chinese are a seriously credible world power.


Maybe they were too scared to say China or worried about maybe giving them ideas.

If it were me, it would have been Mexico and a ton of specially trained soldiers posing as day laborers and the signal came to end the posing and attack. So now Mexico has troops well into the US and their uniformed soldiers and tanks attacking the southern border of the US and smaller units sneaking into the US at undefended locations.

Yeah, not as plausible as China, more so than North Korea, but my version would be made better with Starship Troopers style propaganda shorts. "the Smiths need work done on their patio. No, they have chosen an honest red blooded American to do the job over one of those back stabbing Mexicans who have attacked us and just might rape the entire family."
 
2012-11-15 03:29:10 PM

shifter_: Dalek Caan's doomed mistress: verbaltoxin: twat_waffle: Uzzah: To The Escape Zeppelin!: MysticSavage: SuperChuck: Big Beef Burrito: Polish Hussar: Great Janitor: Dr. Whoof: Flappyhead: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Millennium: TFA: Edward shows Bella their new honeymoon cottage, which unlike most brides, she decides is "perfect" even before looking inside. When she does, it's stocked with wall to wall books, and you'll never guess which one she eventually takes down from its shelf. Never ever.

50 Shades of Grey?

Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding?

Gibbons History of the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire?

The Necronomicon?

The first Twilight novel?

Everyone Poops?

Go, Dog, Go?

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter?

Blade, the graphic novel version?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips?

The 1967 greater metropolitan Memphis telephone directory and yellow pages?

The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion?

Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom?

Schindler's List?

Vampire: The Requiem For Dummies


To Serve Man?
 
2012-11-15 03:35:10 PM
My favorite Ebert quote regarding a Twilight movie was, "The characters in this movie should be arrested for loitering with intent to moan."

I think it was for the second movie.
 
2012-11-15 03:35:11 PM

Rev. Skarekroe: shifter_: Dalek Caan's doomed mistress: verbaltoxin: twat_waffle: Uzzah: To The Escape Zeppelin!: MysticSavage: SuperChuck: Big Beef Burrito: Polish Hussar: Great Janitor: Dr. Whoof: Flappyhead: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Millennium: TFA: Edward shows Bella their new honeymoon cottage, which unlike most brides, she decides is "perfect" even before looking inside. When she does, it's stocked with wall to wall books, and you'll never guess which one she eventually takes down from its shelf. Never ever.

50 Shades of Grey?

Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding?

Gibbons History of the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire?

The Necronomicon?

The first Twilight novel?

Everyone Poops?

Go, Dog, Go?

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter?

Blade, the graphic novel version?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips?

The 1967 greater metropolitan Memphis telephone directory and yellow pages?

The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion?

Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom?

Schindler's List?

Vampire: The Requiem For Dummies

To Serve Man?


It's Not News It's Fark: How Mass Media Tries to Pass Off Crap as News?
 
2012-11-15 03:45:19 PM
 
2012-11-15 04:11:18 PM

Holocaust Agnostic: Rev. Skarekroe: shifter_: Dalek Caan's doomed mistress: verbaltoxin: twat_waffle: Uzzah: To The Escape Zeppelin!: MysticSavage: SuperChuck: Big Beef Burrito: Polish Hussar: Great Janitor: Dr. Whoof: Flappyhead: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Millennium: TFA: Edward shows Bella their new honeymoon cottage, which unlike most brides, she decides is "perfect" even before looking inside. When she does, it's stocked with wall to wall books, and you'll never guess which one she eventually takes down from its shelf. Never ever.

50 Shades of Grey?

Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding?

Gibbons History of the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire?

The Necronomicon?

The first Twilight novel?

Everyone Poops?

Go, Dog, Go?

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter?

Blade, the graphic novel version?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips?

The 1967 greater metropolitan Memphis telephone directory and yellow pages?

The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion?

Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom?

Schindler's List?

Vampire: The Requiem For Dummies

To Serve Man?

It's Not News It's Fark: How Mass Media Tries to Pass Off Crap as News?


The Book of Mormon
 
2012-11-15 04:11:49 PM

robsul82: Millennium: it depends on how they change it.

This is how they changed it. Spoilers, obviously.


I can't tell if that's a good way to try and provide some type of satisfying conclussion or a retarded fake out before the original bullshiat ending.
 
2012-11-15 05:31:02 PM

kiteless: Holocaust Agnostic: Rev. Skarekroe: shifter_: Dalek Caan's doomed mistress: verbaltoxin: twat_waffle: Uzzah: To The Escape Zeppelin!: MysticSavage: SuperChuck: Big Beef Burrito: Polish Hussar: Great Janitor: Dr. Whoof: Flappyhead: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Millennium: TFA: Edward shows Bella their new honeymoon cottage, which unlike most brides, she decides is "perfect" even before looking inside. When she does, it's stocked with wall to wall books, and you'll never guess which one she eventually takes down from its shelf. Never ever.

50 Shades of Grey?

Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding?

Gibbons History of the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire?

The Necronomicon?

The first Twilight novel?

Everyone Poops?

Go, Dog, Go?

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter?

Blade, the graphic novel version?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips?

The 1967 greater metropolitan Memphis telephone directory and yellow pages?

The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion?

Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom?

Schindler's List?

Vampire: The Requiem For Dummies

To Serve Man?

It's Not News It's Fark: How Mass Media Tries to Pass Off Crap as News?

The Book of Mormon


Dracula?

/dying. of. laughter.
 
2012-11-15 05:52:27 PM

sovietski: kiteless: Holocaust Agnostic: Rev. Skarekroe: shifter_: Dalek Caan's doomed mistress: verbaltoxin: twat_waffle: Uzzah: To The Escape Zeppelin!: MysticSavage: SuperChuck: Big Beef Burrito: Polish Hussar: Great Janitor: Dr. Whoof: Flappyhead: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Millennium: TFA: Edward shows Bella their new honeymoon cottage, which unlike most brides, she decides is "perfect" even before looking inside. When she does, it's stocked with wall to wall books, and you'll never guess which one she eventually takes down from its shelf. Never ever.

50 Shades of Grey?

Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding?

Gibbons History of the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire?

The Necronomicon?

The first Twilight novel?

Everyone Poops?

Go, Dog, Go?

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter?

Blade, the graphic novel version?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips?

The 1967 greater metropolitan Memphis telephone directory and yellow pages?

The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion?

Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom?

Schindler's List?

Vampire: The Requiem For Dummies

To Serve Man?

It's Not News It's Fark: How Mass Media Tries to Pass Off Crap as News?

The Book of Mormon

Dracula?

/dying. of. laughter.


Well, since it's our favorite actress, Kristen, we can always hope it's An Actor Prepares by Stanislavski...
 
2012-11-15 06:16:40 PM

sure haven't: Taking my wife to see it this weekend.
Will be very worth my time (wink).

/they're just chick flicks, Earth needs to relax


My wife is taking me to see it. And yes, I get a wink.

Kristen Stewart is fine.
 
2012-11-15 07:31:34 PM

kiteless: Holocaust Agnostic: Rev. Skarekroe: shifter_: Dalek Caan's doomed mistress: verbaltoxin: twat_waffle: Uzzah: To The Escape Zeppelin!: MysticSavage: SuperChuck: Big Beef Burrito: Polish Hussar: Great Janitor: Dr. Whoof: Flappyhead: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Millennium: TFA: Edward shows Bella their new honeymoon cottage, which unlike most brides, she decides is "perfect" even before looking inside. When she does, it's stocked with wall to wall books, and you'll never guess which one she eventually takes down from its shelf. Never ever.

50 Shades of Grey?

Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding?

Gibbons History of the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire?

The Necronomicon?

The first Twilight novel?

Everyone Poops?

Go, Dog, Go?

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter?

Blade, the graphic novel version?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips?

The 1967 greater metropolitan Memphis telephone directory and yellow pages?

The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion?

Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom?

Schindler's List?

Vampire: The Requiem For Dummies

To Serve Man?

It's Not News It's Fark: How Mass Media Tries to Pass Off Crap as News?

The Book of Mormon


"Your Movie Sucks" by Ebert?
 
2012-11-15 08:14:02 PM

TimeCubeFan: kiteless: Holocaust Agnostic: Rev. Skarekroe: shifter_: Dalek Caan's doomed mistress: verbaltoxin: twat_waffle: Uzzah: To The Escape Zeppelin!: MysticSavage: SuperChuck: Big Beef Burrito: Polish Hussar: Great Janitor: Dr. Whoof: Flappyhead: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Millennium: TFA: Edward shows Bella their new honeymoon cottage, which unlike most brides, she decides is "perfect" even before looking inside. When she does, it's stocked with wall to wall books, and you'll never guess which one she eventually takes down from its shelf. Never ever.

50 Shades of Grey?

Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding?

Gibbons History of the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire?

The Necronomicon?

The first Twilight novel?

Everyone Poops?

Go, Dog, Go?

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter?

Blade, the graphic novel version?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips?

The 1967 greater metropolitan Memphis telephone directory and yellow pages?

The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion?

Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom?

Schindler's List?

Vampire: The Requiem For Dummies

To Serve Man?

It's Not News It's Fark: How Mass Media Tries to Pass Off Crap as News?

The Book of Mormon

"Your Movie Sucks" by Ebert?


Everybody Poops?
 
2012-11-15 08:40:24 PM

gunga galunga: TimeCubeFan: kiteless: Holocaust Agnostic: Rev. Skarekroe: shifter_: Dalek Caan's doomed mistress: verbaltoxin: twat_waffle: Uzzah: To The Escape Zeppelin!: MysticSavage: SuperChuck: Big Beef Burrito: Polish Hussar: Great Janitor: Dr. Whoof: Flappyhead: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Millennium: TFA: Edward shows Bella their new honeymoon cottage, which unlike most brides, she decides is "perfect" even before looking inside. When she does, it's stocked with wall to wall books, and you'll never guess which one she eventually takes down from its shelf. Never ever.

50 Shades of Grey?

Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding?

Gibbons History of the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire?

The Necronomicon?

The first Twilight novel?

Everyone Poops?

Go, Dog, Go?

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter?

Blade, the graphic novel version?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips?

The 1967 greater metropolitan Memphis telephone directory and yellow pages?

The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion?

Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom?

Schindler's List?

Vampire: The Requiem For Dummies

To Serve Man?

It's Not News It's Fark: How Mass Media Tries to Pass Off Crap as News?

The Book of Mormon

"Your Movie Sucks" by Ebert?

Everybody Poops?


How To Win Friends and Influence People?
 
2012-11-15 10:00:24 PM

Lumbar Puncture: From the trailer I'm guessing that they changed the end of the book, which is disappointing. I was looking forward to the Rifftrax of a movie where two sides get ready for a battle they decide not to have at the end.


I screened it last night...that's the exact ending.
 
2012-11-15 10:04:52 PM

stewmadness: sure haven't: Taking my wife to see it this weekend.
Will be very worth my time (wink).

/they're just chick flicks, Earth needs to relax

My wife is taking me to see it. And yes, I get a wink.

Kristen Stewart is fine.


Taylor Lautnerwhateverhisnameis is the only one that strips down to his underwear.
 
2012-11-15 10:25:21 PM

HempHead: Taylor Lautnerwhateverhisnameis is the only one that strips down to his underwear.


He's OK, but I've heard that he's pretty hairy.

i.imgur.com
 
2012-11-15 11:05:27 PM

gunga galunga: TimeCubeFan: kiteless: Holocaust Agnostic: Rev. Skarekroe: shifter_: Dalek Caan's doomed mistress: verbaltoxin: twat_waffle: Uzzah: To The Escape Zeppelin!: MysticSavage: SuperChuck: Big Beef Burrito: Polish Hussar: Great Janitor: Dr. Whoof: Flappyhead: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Millennium: TFA: Edward shows Bella their new honeymoon cottage, which unlike most brides, she decides is "perfect" even before looking inside. When she does, it's stocked with wall to wall books, and you'll never guess which one she eventually takes down from its shelf. Never ever.

50 Shades of Grey?

Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding?

Gibbons History of the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire?

The Necronomicon?

The first Twilight novel?

Everyone Poops?

Go, Dog, Go?

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter?

Blade, the graphic novel version?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips?

The 1967 greater metropolitan Memphis telephone directory and yellow pages?

The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion?

Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom?

Schindler's List?

Vampire: The Requiem For Dummies

To Serve Man?

It's Not News It's Fark: How Mass Media Tries to Pass Off Crap as News?

The Book of Mormon

"Your Movie Sucks" by Ebert?

Everybody Poops?


The Hardy Boys "Danger on the Vampire Trail"? 'Cause that was a good one. Not their greatest, but pretty good.
 
2012-11-15 11:34:48 PM
where are all the nosy housewife that are outrage over the evil these movies are teaching our children ala Harry Potter?

Oh, if they can lust at actors not even half their age, they don't care?

Well surely this means if their husband happened to approve of a good looking 21-year old girl, they would be completely ok with it, right?

Right?
 
2012-11-15 11:39:14 PM

DeltaPunch: gunga galunga: TimeCubeFan: kiteless: Holocaust Agnostic: Rev. Skarekroe: shifter_: Dalek Caan's doomed mistress: verbaltoxin: twat_waffle: Uzzah: To The Escape Zeppelin!: MysticSavage: SuperChuck: Big Beef Burrito: Polish Hussar: Great Janitor: Dr. Whoof: Flappyhead: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Millennium: TFA: Edward shows Bella their new honeymoon cottage, which unlike most brides, she decides is "perfect" even before looking inside. When she does, it's stocked with wall to wall books, and you'll never guess which one she eventually takes down from its shelf. Never ever.

50 Shades of Grey?

Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding?

Gibbons History of the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire?

The Necronomicon?

The first Twilight novel?

Everyone Poops?

Go, Dog, Go?

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter?

Blade, the graphic novel version?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips?

The 1967 greater metropolitan Memphis telephone directory and yellow pages?

The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion?

Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom?

Schindler's List?

Vampire: The Requiem For Dummies

To Serve Man?

It's Not News It's Fark: How Mass Media Tries to Pass Off Crap as News?

The Book of Mormon

"Your Movie Sucks" by Ebert?

Everybody Poops?

The Hardy Boys "Danger on the Vampire Trail"? 'Cause that was a good one. Not their greatest, but pretty good.


Lestat?
 
2012-11-16 12:01:17 AM

sure haven't: Taking my wife to see it this weekend.
Will be very worth my time (wink).

/they're just chick flicks, Earth needs to relax


Whatever helps you sleep at night. Must be tough, what with missing your testicles and all.

/I kid, I kid...
//...probably.
 
2012-11-16 02:00:06 AM

vwarb: moothemagiccow: WizardofToast: Seeing Breaking Dawn Part 2 get decent reviews. My guess is that people are thankful it's the final movie and that we can move on to The Hobbit next month.

hooray! A franchise! Let's attach ourselves despite the mediocre quality!

What, precisely, makes you think The Hobbit will be mediocre?


The trailer, the director, the writer, and the fact that it's three movies.
 
2012-11-16 02:01:51 AM

ATRDCI: where are all the nosy housewife that are outrage over the evil these movies are teaching our children ala Harry Potter?


Twilight teaches children worse things like the inherent superiority of men and that cults are just misunderstood.
 
2012-11-16 07:33:06 AM

DarkPascual: DeltaPunch: gunga galunga: TimeCubeFan: kiteless: Holocaust Agnostic: Rev. Skarekroe: shifter_: Dalek Caan's doomed mistress: verbaltoxin: twat_waffle: Uzzah: To The Escape Zeppelin!: MysticSavage: SuperChuck: Big Beef Burrito: Polish Hussar: Great Janitor: Dr. Whoof: Flappyhead: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Millennium: TFA: Edward shows Bella their new honeymoon cottage, which unlike most brides, she decides is "perfect" even before looking inside. When she does, it's stocked with wall to wall books, and you'll never guess which one she eventually takes down from its shelf. Never ever.

50 Shades of Grey?

Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding?

Gibbons History of the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire?

The Necronomicon?

The first Twilight novel?

Everyone Poops?

Go, Dog, Go?

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter?

Blade, the graphic novel version?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips?

The 1967 greater metropolitan Memphis telephone directory and yellow pages?

The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion?

Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom?

Schindler's List?

Vampire: The Requiem For Dummies

To Serve Man?

It's Not News It's Fark: How Mass Media Tries to Pass Off Crap as News?

The Book of Mormon

"Your Movie Sucks" by Ebert?

Everybody Poops?

The Hardy Boys "Danger on the Vampire Trail"? 'Cause that was a good one. Not their greatest, but pretty good.

Lestat?


Star Trek The Next Generation Technical Manual?
 
2012-11-16 09:13:30 AM
I made the mistake of telling my wife about this review.

She then spent 5 minutes explaining to me who Renesmee or whoever was and I wanted to shoot myself in the neck
 
2012-11-16 09:38:22 AM

Derwood: I made the mistake of telling my wife about this review.

She then spent 5 minutes explaining to me who Renesmee or whoever was and I wanted to shoot myself in the neck


You forgot to engage the wife filter?
 
2012-11-16 10:44:45 AM

Aboleth: DarkPascual: DeltaPunch: gunga galunga: TimeCubeFan: kiteless: Holocaust Agnostic: Rev. Skarekroe: shifter_: Dalek Caan's doomed mistress: verbaltoxin: twat_waffle: Uzzah: To The Escape Zeppelin!: MysticSavage: SuperChuck: Big Beef Burrito: Polish Hussar: Great Janitor: Dr. Whoof: Flappyhead: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Millennium: TFA: Edward shows Bella their new honeymoon cottage, which unlike most brides, she decides is "perfect" even before looking inside. When she does, it's stocked with wall to wall books, and you'll never guess which one she eventually takes down from its shelf. Never ever.

50 Shades of Grey?

Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding?

Gibbons History of the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire?

The Necronomicon?

The first Twilight novel?

Everyone Poops?

Go, Dog, Go?

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter?

Blade, the graphic novel version?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips?

The 1967 greater metropolitan Memphis telephone directory and yellow pages?

The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion?

Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom?

Schindler's List?

Vampire: The Requiem For Dummies

To Serve Man?

It's Not News It's Fark: How Mass Media Tries to Pass Off Crap as News?

The Book of Mormon

"Your Movie Sucks" by Ebert?

Everybody Poops?

The Hardy Boys "Danger on the Vampire Trail"? 'Cause that was a good one. Not their greatest, but pretty good.

Lestat?

Star Trek The Next Generation Technical Manual?


Strunk and White?
 
2012-11-16 01:20:05 PM

Millennium: Aboleth: DarkPascual: DeltaPunch: gunga galunga: TimeCubeFan: kiteless: Holocaust Agnostic: Rev. Skarekroe: shifter_: Dalek Caan's doomed mistress: verbaltoxin: twat_waffle: Uzzah: To The Escape Zeppelin!: MysticSavage: SuperChuck: Big Beef Burrito: Polish Hussar: Great Janitor: Dr. Whoof: Flappyhead: Lady Beryl Ersatz-Wendigo: Millennium: TFA: Edward shows Bella their new honeymoon cottage, which unlike most brides, she decides is "perfect" even before looking inside. When she does, it's stocked with wall to wall books, and you'll never guess which one she eventually takes down from its shelf. Never ever.

50 Shades of Grey?

Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding?

Gibbons History of the Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire?

The Necronomicon?

The first Twilight novel?

Everyone Poops?

Go, Dog, Go?

Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter?

Blade, the graphic novel version?

Goodbye, Mr. Chips?

The 1967 greater metropolitan Memphis telephone directory and yellow pages?

The Protocols of the Learned Elders of Zion?

Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom?

Schindler's List?

Vampire: The Requiem For Dummies

To Serve Man?

It's Not News It's Fark: How Mass Media Tries to Pass Off Crap as News?

The Book of Mormon

"Your Movie Sucks" by Ebert?

Everybody Poops?

The Hardy Boys "Danger on the Vampire Trail"? 'Cause that was a good one. Not their greatest, but pretty good.

Lestat?

Star Trek The Next Generation Technical Manual?

Strunk and White?


William Goldman's Adventures in the Screen Trade?

The wife just discovered Twilight and asked me to try and summarize it. "Mormon gothic erotica", I replied, and bad erotica at that
 
2012-11-16 01:21:17 PM

moothemagiccow: ATRDCI: where are all the nosy housewife that are outrage over the evil these movies are teaching our children ala Harry Potter?

Twilight teaches children worse things like the inherent superiority of men and that cults are just misunderstood.


And that abusive relationships are awesome! No seriously, the movies kinda gloss over this but the books it gets weird.

"I barely talk to you in school but I have been sneaking into your room at night to watch you sleep." IS CREEPY NOT SEXY.
 
2012-11-17 07:43:25 PM

shortymac: moothemagiccow: ATRDCI: where are all the nosy housewife that are outrage over the evil these movies are teaching our children ala Harry Potter?

Twilight teaches children worse things like the inherent superiority of men and that cults are just misunderstood.

And that abusive relationships are awesome! No seriously, the movies kinda gloss over this but the books it gets weird.

"I barely talk to you in school but I have been sneaking into your room at night to watch you sleep." IS CREEPY NOT SEXY.


was that wrong? should i have not done that?
 
2012-11-18 12:20:48 PM
I saw the movie out of curiosity, having never seen a Twilight film. It's not as terrible as people enjoy saying, but it is mediocre. Most of it is just a build up to a big superhero fight. Why do the Volturi wait weeks to investigate Bella's baby? Why do they execute the informant, who made an honest mistake? The Volturi leader knew as much as she did, given that he reads minds.
 
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