If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Oregon Live)   The Washington town where "Twilight" takes place in hopes it will sparkle in fame for eternity   (oregonlive.com) divider line 99
    More: Unlikely, Port Angeles, visitor center, Bingham  
•       •       •

3682 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Nov 2012 at 8:14 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



99 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-11-14 09:25:47 PM

89 Stick-Up Kid: Alucard1191: I work at The Brick in Roslyn, so I'm getting a kick out of these replies.

/Really, I do

The Brick will be around long after people forget about Twilight. Is it true that the trough below the bar was for pee??


It is a spitoon for chewing tobacco actually. We have races in it in march.
 
2012-11-14 09:25:53 PM
img2.timeinc.net

I'm sorry what were we talking about?
 
2012-11-14 09:26:06 PM
And so, you look down?
 
2012-11-14 09:27:38 PM

Alucard1191: 89 Stick-Up Kid: Alucard1191: I work at The Brick in Roslyn, so I'm getting a kick out of these replies.

/Really, I do

The Brick will be around long after people forget about Twilight. Is it true that the trough below the bar was for pee??

It is a spitoon for chewing tobacco actually. We have races in it in march.


Boat races, like rubber duckies and paper boats and stuff. Guess I should have clarified that.
 
2012-11-14 09:29:10 PM
Random thoughts from someone who drives through there at least least once a year.

Sully's at the north end of town makes a good burger.

Most of the folks in town are okay, but try to remember you are dealing with red-neck loggers. It isn't the same as the deep south, but it does rhyme.

The recession precipitated by the spotted owl hoopla hit hard and never let up. They have embraced tourism like a religion, but they still don't like strangers. It's a very odd combination.

Camp firewood was $5 a bundle everywhere I looked, until we hit Forks. Then it was $9/bundle of "Twilight Firewood".


/csb?
 
2012-11-14 09:29:51 PM
Reasons to go to Forks:
1) To go to Hoh Rainforest
2) you have to go through when leaving the Hoh Rainforest.
 
2012-11-14 09:32:47 PM

Alucard1191: I work at The Brick in Roslyn, so I'm getting a kick out of these replies.

/Really, I do


Ha, my mom made us take her to Roslyn in 2000 when we lived in Seattle. She was disappoint.
 
2012-11-14 09:33:56 PM

davidphogan: The only exposure I've had to Twilight was needing to walk through the Westin in downtown San Francisco while they were hosting a Twilight convention. I was walking through the lobby and thought they had thrown a thousand cats into blenders at once.

It turned our to be teenage girls screaming because one of the actors had entered the room, and it was then I realized that the cats would have been more pleasant sounding.


Not to mention, the incessant cat howling would occasionally make sense.
 
2012-11-14 09:38:22 PM

Omahawg: head of local tourism bureau?


No, he just works behind the counter. This guy runs the place:
img9.imageshack.us
/taken last summer as I was passing through Forks. I want to emphasize that.
 
2012-11-14 09:38:49 PM
While I do enjoy heading over to the peninsula for various outdoorsy adventures, I AVOID Forks as much as possible just on principle.

I can't fathom anything harshing a nature buzz more than running into a group of belligerent Twitards
 
2012-11-14 09:39:17 PM
I remember when vampires sucked blood. Not cock.
 
2012-11-14 09:41:18 PM
Last year around this time, I got it in my head to travel across the country. Not just across the country like get on the interstate and drive to San Francisco, but find the easternmost and westernmost points of the continental US and drive between them.

Well, it turns out that the former's in Maine (no big surprise there) but the latter's a remote spit of land just west of Ozette, WA. After two weeks meandering about (I avoided interstates and Canada, and I had all the time in the world), I got to Ozette.

Now, I knew that walking to the actual westernmost point of land would be a bit of a hike - turns out to be 3.5 miles. Each way. Now, I've done some hiking, but remember: I'd been sitting on my ass, driving or drinking beer, for half a month.

I made the slow, slippery walk down the path to the Pacific, but then I saw the sun's proximity to the horizon. I was alone, no towns for miles (Ozette isn't a town; it's a ranger station), in the great western temperate rainforest. Worse, I had crappy shoes and jeans on, but I ran that slippery, moss-covered trail all the way back to Ozette, which I reached just as the last dim gleam of... I can't say the word. That dimness that happens around sunset. It's crepuscular. Anyway, I got in my car, breathing hard, just ahead of a bear. No, okay, I'm lying about the bear, but that's what kept me running - I imagined a great Western grizzly had decided I was going to be dinner, and I had to run to outpace it. Yeah, yeah, I know, but it kept me motivated. Being on that trail in the darkness would have been Bad.

Anyway, the shakes set in as I drove off into the night. Not from fear or residual bear-thinking, but from exhaustion. Running over 3 miles when you haven't been training and you're on the wrong side of 45 will do that. My heart beat irregularly in my chest, and even with my seat heaters turned all the way up and the dash heater going full blast, I was cold.

I became keenly aware of my own mortality - and an incredible, head-pounding thirst. You see, like a moron, I'd forgotten water.

Now, I have a GPS and a road atlas - I'm only unprepared when it comes to hiking, not driving - so I looked for the nearest town with a motel.

Imagine my dismay (I was already in shock) when I discovered that town was Forks.

"No," I breathed.

"Oh, please. No."

But it was true.

I could sleep in my car (too cold), or I could beg at the reservation (yeah, right), or I could drive through Forks and on to the next town - a hundred miles further (I didn't think I could make it.)

I found a convenience store after driving for a half an hour and loaded up on water, carbs and electrolytes, but now in addition to being in shock, I was driving tired, and I never knew what the next spasm in my right foot would do to the gas or brake pedal.

Forks, then.

I drove into town, swerving to miss all of the movie merchandise, and found the motel. Decent enough place, honestly, but I had to meander around cardboard cutouts of Edward and Bella.

"Hi, please tell me you have a room for the night."

"Yes, we do. Twilight fan?" (I can say it if it's in a quotation, dammit)

I stood there, shaking, and blinked at her.

"Well, that's okay, we have a room anyway."

I'd almost rather have been eaten by the bear.
 
2012-11-14 09:42:18 PM
I live about 2 hours from Forks and my sister lived there for many years. I've been there many times. Twilight was a godsend. Forks and the surrounding area has always been one of the most poor areas of the state. The Twilight craze really helped a lot of local small business. Hell, my sister got an offer to buy her letterman jacket for several hundred dollars.

I'm not a Twilight fan, but some good has definitely come out of it.
 
2012-11-14 09:43:32 PM
It's a great town to visit if you like :
1) being in the middle of nowhere,
2) moss and mildew,
3) Fungus,
4)Rain, and
5) more rain.
 
2012-11-14 09:48:07 PM

Ivo Shandor: Omahawg: head of local tourism bureau?

No, he just works behind the counter. This guy runs the place:
[img9.imageshack.us image 360x640]
/taken last summer as I was passing through Forks. I want to emphasize that.


Is that a cardboard cut out or the real guy? Impossible to tell.
 
2012-11-14 09:48:36 PM

timujin: The quotes in the headline should have been around "takes place". She may have used the name of the town, but none of it was actually filmed in Forks. They still have tours and stuff, though, it's kind of funny to watch people go around saying "so, if they had actually lived in Forks, that's the high school they would have attended" and stuff like that.

/ex-girlfriend is a Twilight fan
//we were in Port Angeles anyway
///I highly recommend the area, it's really quite beautiful up there
////and with the local economy being the way it is, every bit helps


That's not entirely true. Team Bad Driver Who Almost Killed Bella was filmed at the high school. I recognized the shiatstain upon education from when the Roughrider JV team went out there in 1993 to get our collective asses kicked 55-0. Farking Coach Greenleaf may he be raped by a bull dyke with every social disease known to man and three not yet discovered.
 
2012-11-14 09:51:01 PM
That headline made my brain sparkle
 
2012-11-14 09:51:21 PM
Sparkle in hell, trampires.


Coelacanth: I used to live around Twin Peaks, California where David Lynch used to live. That SOB owes a lot of people royalty checks.


I used to live on Twin Peaks. Gorgeous view. I wish I had taken more photos.
 
2012-11-14 09:52:52 PM
That's got to be awesome for local businesses. Why not capitalize on the bad taste of others? I'd put up with the Twi-tards for money.
 
2012-11-14 09:53:29 PM

Lint Trap: Reasons to go to Forks:
1) To go to Hoh Rainforest
2) you have to go through when leaving the Hoh Rainforest.


True. My ex-GF had family in Forks, and years ago I spent what seemed like an eternity visiting there on a couple of trips. There is absolutely nothing of interest there, and the town is filled with the most primitive examples of ass-backwards hick mouthbreathers that you are likely to find this side of Appalachia (the vast majority of whom, I shiat you not, are missing one or more digits from various sawmill accidents, since it seems to be local law or something that every male citizen over the age of 16 is required to spend some portion of his life working in a sawmill). The area around it (including the Hoh rain forest) is very beautiful, but the town itself is a blight on humanity and should not exist.
 
2012-11-14 09:54:13 PM
The Washington town in which "Twilight" takes place hopes it will sparkle in fame for eternity

It's really not that hard.

/even rewritten, headline still sucks
 
2012-11-14 09:55:34 PM
I spent a few months in that area back in the early 90's. It was full of hippies and loggers. I can't imagine it being overtaken by young vampires in need of acting lessons.
 
2012-11-14 09:56:07 PM

Mad_Radhu: IlGreven: timujin: The quotes in the headline should have been around "takes place". She may have used the name of the town, but none of it was actually filmed in Forks.

Yep. The protip is this: If the setting is anywhere in the Pacific Northwest, it's filmed in Vancover.

Hell, Fringe started filming there after season one, despite being set in NYC/Boston.


Not to mention subbing for countless alien planets on "Stargate: SG1". 

pics.livejournal.com
 
2012-11-14 09:57:18 PM
Headline trainwreck...deliberate?
 
2012-11-14 09:57:39 PM

davidphogan: The only exposure I've had to Twilight was needing to walk through the Westin in downtown San Francisco while they were hosting a Twilight convention. I was walking through the lobby and thought they had thrown a thousand cats into blenders at once.

It turned our to be teenage girls screaming because one of the actors had entered the room, and it was then I realized that the cats would have been more pleasant sounding.


Speaking as someone who was dragged to the first two movies, and witnessed the mass of shriveling ovaries which was the audience, those weren't teenagers you heard...
 
2012-11-14 10:01:50 PM
My daughter was very into Twilight when the first movie came out so we made a trip to Forks.
It was fun and she was excited and I got to be the "cool dad", but when we went to the bookstore that's apparently in the movie, the owner could care less.
They had a small corner of Twilight books and bookmarks. She asked if he had more and he said, "Naw. I don't think so.".
Thought it kind of cool he wasn't "riding the wave" of it all.
 
2012-11-14 10:04:02 PM
I was there a year ago. Nobody was there. It was awesome. Sea stacks were neat with the waves crashing. Sucked getting over all of the drift wood....well, trees, large trees littering the beach.
 
2012-11-14 10:07:53 PM
t1.gstatic.com
 
2012-11-14 10:12:45 PM

dogboy360: The Forks area is beautiful. Very close to the Solduc valley and hot springs.

/was up there in Oct.


But, To live there, you'd better have a structured settlement of some kind....or a green thumb 'cause jobs are deeply non-existent.

/I mean, Bigfoot-type non-existent
//I wonder if Bob's still running that Bigfoot tour?
/// Get seasick? Ilwaco always needs chummers
 
2012-11-14 10:19:17 PM

I should be in the kitchen: davidphogan:

Speaking as someone who was dragged to the first two movies, and witnessed the mass of shriveling ovaries which was the audience, those weren't teenagers you heard...


One of my friends took a bottle of vodka to the theater and proved that booze makes it infinitely more tolerable. IIRC, that's the only way she agreed to go with whoever else it was.
 
2012-11-14 10:24:15 PM

Mikeyworld: dogboy360:

/// Get seasick? Ilwaco always needs chummers


Damn! I meant La Push...I apologize to Long Baitch. I didn't mean to imply that there's teen scammers there.

Street view still has the main road (SR 101), so ya can see what it's like in Fairyland
 
2012-11-14 10:27:58 PM
Stayed the night in Forks last year while touring the Olympic Peninsula. There's not much out there and Forks is the only place with a hotel for 50 miles in any direction. I'd say about a third of the businesses had some kind of Twilight tie-in. There isn't much of anything there but the nearest largeish town is Port Angeles and that's at least 60 miles up US 101. I did see a "Twilight Tour" bus stop at Rialto Beach while I was there. Some special people hopped out of that. Still, it's beautiful out there when it's not raining. I miss the Pacific Northwest and I really liked the Olympic Peninsula. Too bad my ship is now on the opposite coast in lovely Norfolk, Virginia!
 
2012-11-14 10:57:42 PM

Alucard1191: 89 Stick-Up Kid: Alucard1191: I work at The Brick in Roslyn, so I'm getting a kick out of these replies.

/Really, I do

The Brick will be around long after people forget about Twilight. Is it true that the trough below the bar was for pee??

It is a spitoon for chewing tobacco actually. We have races in it in march.


I actually meant that men peed in it back in the day...not recently LOL. I go to Salmon La Sac to camp about twice a year in the summer and always spend one of the nights getting blotto at the Brick.
 
2012-11-14 11:05:58 PM

AssAsInAssassin: Where it takes place in? How about "where it takes place"?

I had to read that misbegotten headline twice to understand it.

Sometimes my grasp of grammar is an impediment to understanding the scribblings of the Great Unwashed.


Until I read the comments, I thought the headline was missing a word.
 
2012-11-14 11:25:03 PM
Drove through Port Angeles (aka PA) once and since I listened to the audiobook on a long drive (and about killed myself) I went looking for where Bella and Edward had their first meal. It was on some long depressing strip of shops. I couldn't find it and so I asked an old guy that ran a second hand book store. Doesn't know the place. Yeah right, there's a total of zero people in your shop and you don't know where the one thing is people that come to this area are looking for. Anyway I found it (yes I know you're waiting with baited breath) and it had a sign about "Edward and Bella's first date"

The town was even more depressing than the craphole in Indiana that I grew up in. Anyone with any sense or ambition flees when they graduate high school. The rest hang around, start doing meth, end up in jail, and then die in some love triangle / gun accident at a picnic / boredom.

/ actually liked the first movie
 
2012-11-14 11:28:27 PM

89 Stick-Up Kid: Alucard1191: 89 Stick-Up Kid: Alucard1191: I work at The Brick in Roslyn, so I'm getting a kick out of these replies.

/Really, I do

The Brick will be around long after people forget about Twilight. Is it true that the trough below the bar was for pee??

It is a spittoon for chewing tobacco actually. We have races in it in march.

I actually meant that men peed in it back in the day...not recently LOL. I go to Salmon La Sac to camp about twice a year in the summer and always spend one of the nights getting blotto at the Brick.


It was never meant as a urinal, it has always functioned as a spittoon. That doesn't mean people haven't peed in it, and I know 2 people that have, but we really do frown upon it. It was installed because the miners only chewed tobacco, they weren't allowed to smoke in the mines, hence the running water spittoon. To my knowledge it has been there for well over 50 years too.
 
2012-11-14 11:46:06 PM

Lint Trap: Reasons to go to Forks:
1) To go to Hoh Rainforest
2) you have to go through when leaving the Hoh Rainforest.


100% this. The wife and I stopped there to get lunch in a small pizzeria. They had a special twilight themed menu. It was the saddest bunch of sad that ever had a chance to sad. I got the taco pizza, because it was probably the closest thing to Arrested Development's "Skip's Scramble" that I was ever going to eat.

Do not order the taco pizza.

The Hoh Rainforest was beautiful.
 
2012-11-15 12:00:17 AM

facisto: The Hoh Rainforest was beautiful.


The Hoh River Trail is one of the best I've ever been on. In about 6 hours of hiking you can go from the rainforest at almost sea level to a glacier in the clouds at 4300 feet.
 
2012-11-15 12:15:23 AM

farkingismybusiness: [i.imgur.com image 586x734]


Holy farking crap!!. That is the goddamn most insane fruit loop I have ever seen. That woman is either a great actor and simply trolling or is completely mentally spun. Yet there is probably some damn guy out there that hit that thing.
 
2012-11-15 12:27:57 AM

CraicBaby: They should talk to Roslyn, WA about that.


And Astoria, OR which still basks in a light after-glow from a single movie with no associated book that made it vaguely famous in 1985.
 
2012-11-15 12:32:45 AM
It'll pass.
www.mysteriousnovascotia.com
/Used to be a pilgrimage apparently.
//Now it's just another grave.
 
2012-11-15 12:40:07 AM
Sparkle, glow. Same diff.

ninjamonkey.us
 
2012-11-15 12:41:54 AM

Ivo Shandor: Omahawg: head of local tourism bureau?

No, he just works behind the counter. This guy runs the place:
[img9.imageshack.us image 360x640]
/taken last summer as I was passing through Forks. I want to emphasize that.


Emphasis clear. You and your cardboard standee were not staying there.
 
2012-11-15 02:41:00 AM

Arachnophobe: The Stealth Hippopotamus: I say we loot, burn then rape that town as a warning to other who would support this level of stupid.

Rape the horses and then ride off on the women?


Would you say I have a "plethora?"

/it's a sweater!
 
2012-11-15 02:56:23 AM

Smeggy Smurf: timujin: The quotes in the headline should have been around "takes place". She may have used the name of the town, but none of it was actually filmed in Forks. They still have tours and stuff, though, it's kind of funny to watch people go around saying "so, if they had actually lived in Forks, that's the high school they would have attended" and stuff like that.

/ex-girlfriend is a Twilight fan
//we were in Port Angeles anyway
///I highly recommend the area, it's really quite beautiful up there
////and with the local economy being the way it is, every bit helps

That's not entirely true. Team Bad Driver Who Almost Killed Bella was filmed at the high school. I recognized the shiatstain upon education from when the Roughrider JV team went out there in 1993 to get our collective asses kicked 55-0. Farking Coach Greenleaf may he be raped by a bull dyke with every social disease known to man and three not yet discovered.


Sorry, man, your memory is fooling you. None of the movie was filmed in Forks (or Port Angeles, for that matter), you can check for yourself, they even tell you that when you visit. The first one was filmed in Oregon, maybe the school they used looked a lot like the school in Forks, but it's not the same one.
 
2012-11-15 02:57:17 AM

arentol: CraicBaby: They should talk to Roslyn, WA about that.

And Astoria, OR which still basks in a light after-glow from a single movie with no associated book that made it vaguely famous in 1985.


I've never understood the fascination with that movie. And I'm a native Oregonian.
 
2012-11-15 09:25:11 AM

arentol: CraicBaby: They should talk to Roslyn, WA about that.

And Astoria, OR which still basks in a light after-glow from a single movie with no associated book that made it vaguely famous in 1985.


Hey now, it also had Short Circuit to its fame as well.
 
2012-11-15 02:42:29 PM

Mad_Radhu: arentol: CraicBaby: They should talk to Roslyn, WA about that.

And Astoria, OR which still basks in a light after-glow from a single movie with no associated book that made it vaguely famous in 1985.

Hey now, it also had Short Circuit to its fame as well.


farm3.staticflickr.com
 
2012-11-16 07:13:16 PM
We stopped in Forks, WA during a family vacation a few years ago. It was before the movies were released, but after teenage girls started reading this dreck. Daughter Clagwell posed in front of the welcome to Forks sign, and a local teen shouted out "Go home, dweeb!" at her as I snapped a picture.

Good times.
 
Displayed 49 of 99 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report