If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.
Duplicate of another approved link: 7429558


(Yahoo)   Think Fido is going to protect your house? Think again. Your dog wants to play with the burglar   (news.yahoo.com) divider line 150
    More: Obvious, Jeff Schettler, dog trainer, rottweiler, Kevlar, Wesson, German Shepherd, burglary, dogs  
•       •       •

4294 clicks; Favorite

150 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-11-14 03:21:39 PM
Honestly, in our house, it isn't the dogs you need to be afraid of...\

it's the wife....
 
2012-11-14 03:25:12 PM

tweek46420: why did you tell the dog the combination to begin with.


She asked! And it's hard to tell a face like this "no"

dancininanson.net

vballer: Ditto. They'd get away with everying but my golden's toys.


They're funny that way.
 
2012-11-14 03:26:23 PM
Unless they're trained for it, a dog isn't the best thing to guard your house. They will bark...but that's not much of a deterrent if they bark all the time.

However, they are fiercely loyal and will defend YOU...even the little ones.
 
2012-11-14 03:28:30 PM

SnyderCat: Honestly, in our house, it isn't the dogs you need to be afraid of...\

it's the wife....


She scares the crap out of me.
 
2012-11-14 03:29:37 PM
I have 2 Ausie mixes - one is a collie mix (she'll lick your face off and give anyone a beer) the other is mixed with chow. He will not let even neighbors he knows past the the front door unless my collie intervenes. They make a great team!
 
2012-11-14 03:30:53 PM

Dancin_In_Anson: tweek46420: why did you tell the dog the combination to begin with.

She asked! And it's hard to tell a face like this "no"

[dancininanson.net image 640x480]

vballer: Ditto. They'd get away with everying but my golden's toys.

They're funny that way.


fair enough it's hard to tell this face no as well

sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net
 
2012-11-14 03:32:04 PM
Like many others, I do not want my dogs to protect my stuff. I *do* expect them to protect US.
 
2012-11-14 03:33:09 PM
My dog attacks anyone who let's themselves into my house. So long as I open the door she's happy. If they let themselves in she's all teeth.

She's rescue but we got her when she was still being bottle fed so not sure where she learned this behavior. But I've been encouraging it with food and play whenever possible.

/CSB in college my fraternity had a failed police dog for a pet. A someone tried to break in. We heard a noise and came running. Found the dog wagging his tail and his face covered in the robber's blood. When the cops came one said to me "We taught him that." They never caught the guy so guess it couldn't have been so bad.
 
2012-11-14 03:33:19 PM
2 rat terriers and 1 rescue (looks like a schnoodle but who knows).

All 3 will bark like mad if someone's at the door (Fedex just rings and runs now), however if you make it inside:

One of them is a ball knocker.
All 3 will happily dance around that you are there and will bring you toys and offer kisses.

If you are a field mouse and Esther (RT) sees you then all bets are off and you are dead inside 3 seconds. (She alerts us if she sees a scorpion inside which is cool, too).

The cats will ignore you completely.
 
2012-11-14 03:34:55 PM
1. Dog barks when burglar enters property
2. Barking wakes me up
3. I grab the shotgun
4. If the barking dog does not deter the burglar to visit a neighbor instead
5. Burglar gets shot, does not pass go, does not profit

One of my dogs will play with you, as long as you are white... Freaking dog is a hard core racist... We have to put her in the yard when certain company visits...
 
2012-11-14 03:35:57 PM
Intruder didn't smell black enough. Smart dogs.

/hey it's Fark, right? 
 
2012-11-14 03:36:41 PM
My dog (50 pounds of mutt boxer/some type of terrier) weird damn dog... loves puppies or dogs that she knew when they were puppies and cats of all varieties. Hates all other dogs unless they're male and unneutered.

Barks like she's ready to rip the throat out of anyone who dares come to our door. As soon as they get in though she's the friendliest damn dog on the planet.

/loves belly rubs
//don't steal my stuff, but if you do at least rub the dogs belly realy quick. It makes her day
 
2012-11-14 03:38:35 PM

R.A.Danny: SnyderCat: Honestly, in our house, it isn't the dogs you need to be afraid of...\

it's the wife....

She scares the crap out of me.


LOL She's completely harmless...just don't mess with her mate or her babies.
 
2012-11-14 03:39:05 PM
I have a Smooth Fox Terrier who would defend me with his life. I also have a 13-lb Bichon who hates strangers. The two of them together would tag team like Yukon Cornelius's sled dogs.
My neighbor tried to break into my house years ago before I had any dogs. Now released from prison, he is living next door to me again and he won't mess with me again as he is terrified of my dogs. That is deterrent enough for me!
 
2012-11-14 03:51:42 PM

santadog: Doesn't he look friendly? He is, unti you knock on the door, or get near my truck.

[imageshack.us image 480x640]


Crazy how that works. I knew a sheriff who was K9. That shepherd loved me to death. I would pet the heck out of him and play with him for hours. However, if he was in the police car and the sheriff was not around. That dog would try to put itself through the window to bite your head off. It knew who I was but it also knew what it was suppose to protect and that it was only going to let one man near that car.
 
2012-11-14 03:52:09 PM

tweek46420: fair enough it's hard to tell this face no as well


HAHAHAHAHA!
 
2012-11-14 03:56:38 PM
My "guard" dogs (2 Shar Pei) are there to alert me when/if someone might want to come into my house while I am home and provide enough intimidation to the person so that they think twice about it. At best, maybe they will stall them long enough for me to arm myself.

If I am not home...come in, take what you want. I have a LOT of home owners insurance. Just don't hurt my dogs or I will have to hunt you down and kill you with my bare hands.

/Internet tough guy
 
2012-11-14 03:59:57 PM
The big one would either play or hide depending on how scary the intruder was. The little one would fight. I know this because she responds aggressively even to welcome visitors while we're home. Half chihuahua, half toy fox terrier, aaaaaall attitude.

i.imgur.com
 
2012-11-14 04:00:45 PM
My dog is a rescue, 60 lbs of pure mutt. He is loyal, gentle, and utterly ferocious when the home is threatened. Anything that appears to threaten me or my son causes him to go into walking buzz-saw mode immediately. Which is interesting, in that he is absolutely gentle with my son, and with me.

Oh... and for Dancin, it isn't that dogs are the only way to defend a home, they are the most efficient, cheapest, and most effective way. I used to know a few Very Bad People. Experienced boosters hate dogs with the fire of a 1000 suns. Houses with dogs were ALWAYS given a pass, even if the dog was one of those little hairy rats that people like to call dogs. You cannot sneak up on a dog reliably, and unlike alarms, which everyone tunes out, people notice dog barks. Plus, even though there is a chance that you won't get bit, who the hell wants to take that chance? Also, unlike people, you cannot intimidate a dog with a knife or gun if it comes to it. Dog will just bite your ass.
 
2012-11-14 04:04:12 PM

Kazrath: santadog: Doesn't he look friendly? He is, unti you knock on the door, or get near my truck.

[imageshack.us image 480x640]

Crazy how that works. I knew a sheriff who was K9. That shepherd loved me to death. I would pet the heck out of him and play with him for hours. However, if he was in the police car and the sheriff was not around. That dog would try to put itself through the window to bite your head off. It knew who I was but it also knew what it was suppose to protect and that it was only going to let one man near that car.


I've been lucky enough to get to know a few police dogs. It's amazing how they truly understand the difference between 'on duty' and 'off duty'.
 
2012-11-14 04:06:12 PM
Yeah, I have two large pit bulls who love everyone, and I have always suspected this.

Basically unless the burglar is a squirrel or another dog, he won't encounter any more resistance than a polite insistence that it is a good time to go to the park.

But god help that burglar if he is a squirrel or another dog. They hate those things.
 
2012-11-14 04:07:51 PM
My 115 mastiff/rott mix would beat them to death with his wagging tail. I do wonder though if anyone has tried this while a family member is at home? I think you would see a different reaction in some dogs if a member of their pack is at home and a stranger just walks in.
 
2012-11-14 04:08:28 PM
farm6.staticflickr.com
Would not let anyone get in, can crack a gun safe.
 
2012-11-14 04:23:02 PM
God, this article is as stupid as the "experiment" where some local TV station showed that the club could easily be defeated by simply cutting the steering wheel. Took about 20 seconds with a hack saw.

What that beacon of journalistic integrity failed to mention, just like this hack job, is that 90%+ of thieves prefer to steal something quickly and quietly. Their first choice, unlocked/unattended cars, houses, etc. Once you put an obstacle in their way, they most likely move on to another, easier target.

Sure, most dogs won't attack someone who walks in your front door when no one is home (like in this article), but then they would be taking a pretty big leap of faith when they hear my two dogs barking loudly. As was said before in this thread, when that door opens slightly and you hear the growl/see the teeth, most folks will be happy to leave.

On the other hand, I'd love to see this idiot try the same thing at 2:30 in the morning, coming in through a window with his right arm un-protected. Something tells me the results may not be so rosy for Mr Schettler.
 
2012-11-14 04:24:56 PM
I have a 100 lbs Rottie....Tank. When the pizza guy, mail man, anyone like that comes around and rings the door bell...he barks....runs to the door...tries to stop but skids into the door....by the time I open the door, the guy is about 10 steps back from the house. When he runs in the backyard its sounds like a friggin horse running back there. Sooooo, if you make it into the house because he hasn't scared the sh*t out of you, he will will not be happy that you are there, I have friends that wont come by until the beast is "put away". I think (hopefully) he would protect my house. Its also alarmed...
 
2012-11-14 04:28:44 PM
I have a big dog who barks at unusual noises outside, especially at night. I imagine this would deter at least some burglars. He learns pretty quickly to distinguish what's a normal neighbor sound and what's not.

Also, despite being a friendly dog overall, he has barked at a creepy guy in our neighborhood who I also think is creepy. I like to pretend he would have it in for anybody who was tryin' to git me.

I recall hearing about a blind woman with a seeing-eye dog, early one morning the dog started growling and acting very strange so she called the cops. Turned out there was a seeing-impaired guy outside trying to get in. This was somebody she met at an organization for blind people. The guy had shown up with the intention of murdering the woman, for whatever crazy reason. Pretty sure this was an actual news item and not an urban legend. Anyway, I hope my dog would let me know if he sensed homicidal intent.
 
2012-11-14 04:29:00 PM
my dog would just show them where I keep the valuables.
 
2012-11-14 04:32:07 PM
We own three attack terriers. I can only hope the burglars are either squirrels or mice.
 
2012-11-14 04:34:10 PM
I've had an apartment robbed with my dog there, and they put her in her crate while burgled. I imagine my dog (a beagle) licked them more than growled. Still, I wanted to split their skull for touching my dog in my home more than than for taking my stuff.
 
2012-11-14 04:38:45 PM
i.imgur.com

Meet Cruiser: a mostly useless Corgi / Bassett Hound mix.
 
2012-11-14 04:40:41 PM

Egalitarian: Also, despite being a friendly dog overall, he has barked at a creepy guy in our neighborhood who I also think is creepy. I like to pretend he would have it in for anybody who was tryin' to git me.


my dog is aggressive toward visitors when my wife is home alone but relaxed when it is just me or I am there also. So yeah, they seem to pick up on if you are even a bit uneasy.
 
2012-11-14 04:43:58 PM
Dancin_In_Anson:
She asked! And it's hard to tell a face like this "no"

./i>
I can only hope to be as happy someday as your dog in that picture. Talk about pure and unbridled joy.
 
2012-11-14 04:45:20 PM
As a kid our house was broken into twice (not bad for Detroit!) and each time we came home to find a broken window, missing valuables, and a guilty as hell looking springer spaniel. It's like he knew that he had failed at his one job. I was just glad that he was such a puss so no one hurt him.

Fast forward twenty years and I'm coming home very late from work and as I'm jiggling the stubborn front door lock my lab/husky mix starts barking and snarling up a storm. I finally get the door unlocked and it swings in a little too fast and crashes against the doorstop. Next thing I see is a black blur scooting down the hallway so fast that her butt was in front of her head.

From my small sample size I've concluded that most family dogs consider their job done once the bad guy has crossed the threshold.
 
2012-11-14 04:47:33 PM

gremlin1: [i877.photobucket.com image 640x360]
First you would have to get the door open. Then the dog would remove the body part of his choice.
My neighbor and I used to let each others dogs out if we were going to be late, until I got Jack. He refused to leave the house and wouldn't let her in. When he started growling she gave up. No matter how much we tried to convince him it was ok he refused to go along with it. He was over 2 when I got him from an animal cruelty rescue situation. He loves me and the cat and will only allow people in the house if he is on a leash and that is an improvement. He won't take food from anyone unless I tell him it's ok. He's 11 now and he's as good as he's going to get.


I had a similar dog. I found Fannie (Dobie mix) on the side of the road. She was about 3 months old, weighed about 8 lbs., and had a broken femur. She was the most pitiful thing I had ever seen. She eventually grew up to be about 60 lbs and grew out of the limp she had. Although she was sweet and gentle to me, she bit more than one stranger that invaded her space. Not so much vicious as she was scared. I can't really blame her. She had a special hatred for men she didn't know. However, in her later years she would climb into my father-in-law's lap when they would visit. She was with me for 8 years then the cancer bug came.
 
2012-11-14 04:50:34 PM

akula: I can only hope to be as happy someday as your dog in that picture. Talk about pure and unbridled joy.


She thinks she can fly too!

dancininanson.net
 
2012-11-14 04:56:20 PM
4.bp.blogspot.com

dog wanting to play with the burger
 
2012-11-14 05:00:23 PM
I grew up with police trained German shepherds, hey protected a huge area and we were never burglarized. They once tried to kill them by throwing a poisoned t-bone steak, but both Rex and Diamant didn't fall for it. Next morning we go to the terrace and find both panting longingly next to the steak. They were trained to only eat if fed by us,

Fast forward now, my 55 lb pit/shepherd mix is a tiny angel compared to the German Shepherds and my brother always underestimated him until the day he tried to sneak back in. My dog growled and was ready to pounce. He may not be police trained but I have no doubt he'd make me proud.

He's the one in the foreground waiting for the ball to be launched...

img690.imageshack.us
 
2012-11-14 05:10:08 PM

santadog: Doesn't he look friendly? He is, unti you knock on the door, or get near my truck.

[imageshack.us image 480x640]


Looks a lot like this post-Apocalyptic dog...

1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-11-14 05:15:00 PM
He'll go investigate any noises at night and might bark. That's enough to wake me up and that's all I need to take it from there.

sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net
 
2012-11-14 05:21:51 PM
Does your little dog bite?

No.

Ouch. I thought you said your dog doesn't bite?

That is not my dog.

Old joke.

***

The fleas suck my dog so dry I make him sleep in a coffin.

Older joke.

***

Cur est canem?

Quia canem mihi, cur non est .


Oldest joke of the lot.
 
2012-11-14 05:41:46 PM
i.imgur.com">

Men, not so much, but if you're female or a child, these two would let you get away with anything.
 
2012-11-14 06:11:42 PM

Dancin_In_Anson: My Golden would not only want to play, but for a treat she'd serve up the combination to the gun safe.


cpub.s3.amazonaws.com

approves
 
2012-11-14 06:29:56 PM

R.A.Danny: petec: .but many will attack if a member of their pack is being assaulted..

This. My Australian Shepherd would let anyone into the house if we weren't there, but gave the 14 year old that pushed my 5 year old an arm full of holes and is loathe to let someone stand between either of the kids and him.


Our Aussie is the same way. Even if I rough house with our teenage boys, he gets all barky/growly and tries to protect them. Till he realizes I am his Daddy. Then he gets that "sorry daddy" look and tries to lick me!!
 
2012-11-14 06:37:11 PM

btfoom: God, this article is as stupid as the "experiment" where some local TV station showed that the club could easily be defeated by simply cutting the steering wheel. Took about 20 seconds with a hack saw.

What that beacon of journalistic integrity failed to mention, just like this hack job, is that 90%+ of thieves prefer to steal something quickly and quietly. Their first choice, unlocked/unattended cars, houses, etc. Once you put an obstacle in their way, they most likely move on to another, easier target.


90%+ of people using made-up statistics to back up their assertions end up looking more stupid than the articles they're refuting.
 
2012-11-14 06:48:44 PM

Overfiend: Then he gets that "sorry daddy" look and tries to lick me!!


My sister was an athletic masseuse before she settled on being a yogi; she came over and brought her table to give me a full body massage a couple weeks after some invasive surgery I had. Boy went nuts. Especially when she started the swedish tapotement portion... he was so confused because he knew and loved her but to his mind she'shiatting' me and it just freaked him out. He kept half jumping on the table (85 lb Hovawart) to check on me and all of our assurances that I was ok did not help. We finally had to just close the door, even then he continued his freakout with whining and scratching at the door. Poor thing....
 
2012-11-14 06:57:54 PM

CapeFearCadaver: Overfiend: Then he gets that "sorry daddy" look and tries to lick me!!

My sister was an athletic masseuse before she settled on being a yogi; she came over and brought her table to give me a full body massage a couple weeks after some invasive surgery I had. Boy went nuts. Especially when she started the swedish tapotement portion... he was so confused because he knew and loved her but to his mind she'shiatting' me and it just freaked him out. He kept half jumping on the table (85 lb Hovawart) to check on me and all of our assurances that I was ok did not help. We finally had to just close the door, even then he continued his freakout with whining and scratching at the door. Poor thing....


"I'm next, I'm next, I'm next, I'm next. Time's up, c'mon. Me next!"

alternatively

"GET OFF THE TABLE; WE ARE NOT ALLOWED ON TABLES. GET DOWN BEFORE SOMEONE NOTICES."
 
2012-11-14 07:29:06 PM
The burglar would be stuck throwing a tennis ball for 3 hours for my Jack Russell mix.
 
2012-11-14 07:40:08 PM

ProfessorOhki: "I'm next, I'm next, I'm next, I'm next. Time's up, c'mon. Me next!"

alternatively

"GET OFF THE TABLE; WE ARE NOT ALLOWED ON TABLES. GET DOWN BEFORE SOMEONE NOTICES."


Thanks for the chuckles, needed them :)
 
2012-11-14 08:22:13 PM
How about just leaving a repeat be once in a while? This thread doubled the original.
 
2012-11-14 09:19:00 PM

R.A.Danny: How about just leaving a repeat be once in a while? This thread doubled the original.


Because the original Subby was far more awesome.
 
Displayed 50 of 150 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report