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(Yahoo)   Think Fido is going to protect your house? Think again. Your dog wants to play with the burglar   (news.yahoo.com) divider line 150
    More: Obvious, Jeff Schettler, dog trainer, rottweiler, Kevlar, Wesson, German Shepherd, burglary, dogs  
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2012-11-14 02:28:19 PM
I think it's reasonable to expect house dogs to not attack a burglar, depending on how they enter the premises. If they bang on the door and break glass, I would be surprised if my dogs didn't get pissed. But if it was relatively easy to get in, they would probably assume it was a guest.

That said, if someone broke in and attacked me or my wife, then I am pretty damn sure either my Bull Mastiff or Saint Bernard would come to the rescue.

Once the dogs break it up, then it's the shotgun's turn to play.
 
2012-11-14 02:28:34 PM

SundaesChild: Tat'dGreaser: Wait a minute, every single thread about guns and home protection have taught me that big dogs are the only way to guard your home.

And a gun will do what for you if you don't happen to be home?


Duh, guns shoot themselves.

People don't kill people, guns do.
 
2012-11-14 02:28:54 PM

Dancin_In_Anson: My Golden would not only want to play, but for a treat she'd serve up the combination to the gun safe.


why did you tell the dog the combination to begin with.
 
2012-11-14 02:29:59 PM
120 lb German Shepherd. Dog patrols the house during the night. Will fark up any intruders, why? That's his job and his home. and he takes it very seriously. He also loves pretending he is a horse with my son...at least he puts up with it.

At the same time, he has a fantastic memory. If you have ever been welcomed into the house you are golden. Had a friend come up to grab some tickets I left under the mat. Dog started going nuts and barking as she walked up the driveway. "Major, it's Angie." Dead silence after that.
 
2012-11-14 02:31:24 PM
I used to have one that was part shepherd, part pitbull, and part chainsaw when I was a kid. My mom and dad could take a steak out of it's mouth without a growl. Ditto me and my best friend. OTOH, if a stranger tried to break in when we were out we'd have likely needed to replace the carpets and repaint the walls, but we wouldn't need to buy dog food for a month because when we got home Monty would've been curled up, alternately snoozing and burping while digesting the poor bastard.
Monty terrified the mailman, though, so we ended up giving him away to a biker with a large bike shop/parts place just outside of town who needed a protection system for his place.
 
2012-11-14 02:31:49 PM
I live in a rather new, rural subdivision. Almost everyone has

Treygreen13: How my dog will react to the burglar is not the issue. It's how the burglar reacts to the dog.


This. I have a 55 lbs. Retriever/Husky mix (Beulah) who's super friendly, but she barks/growls at any noises and strange vehicles in the vicinity of the house, and a beagle mix (Dexter) who joins in with her with a very loud baying if someone comes to the door.

Most burglars will either case a place, or knock on your door pretending to sell something to make sure no one's home. My neighbour doesn't have a dog or an alarm system. Unless they know I have something of particularly high value (I don't), they'll break into his house over mine. How my dogs would react is a non-issue. Quite honestly I'd prefer them to be passive if no one's home. I'd rather lose my TV that's covered by insurance than have my dogs hurt or killed.

I also know from experience that they're reaction is vastly different if my wife is home alone with the baby. Alone they'd have the same kind of reaction as these dogs (Strange human... unsure what to do... maybe I'll bark a bit and then settle down), with my wife and baby home alone, they're a lot more protective. Came home late one night and the baby squawked so I went to go check on her. Beulah didn't realize I was home. She blew past me to get between me and the baby and then gave me a, "It's business time" growl that I'd never heard out of her before. Never been happier to have a dog ready to attack me, even if it did end up waking the baby.
 
2012-11-14 02:31:52 PM
I'd rather have a friendly dog than one who might bite my hand off. Get an alarm system if you want home protection.
 
2012-11-14 02:32:41 PM

dancindan84: I live in a rather new, rural subdivision. Almost everyone has Treygreen13: How my dog will react to the burglar is not the issue. It's how the burglar reacts to the dog.


And this is what happens when I start to write one thing, change my mind and forget to preview.
 
2012-11-14 02:32:46 PM
My dane/lab will bark lots but lick you to death, my red heeler will hold her ground and make the same face that the alien makes in Alien (lots of drooling and growling, too - kind of disturbing, to tell the truth).

Whoever mentioned the chow is totally correct; my buddy has one and it bites all of us whenever we're near it. We all shared a summer place on Hornby this summer, and that Chow kept everyone out of the place unless my friend was near.

Damned nervous dog, I'll tell ya.
 
2012-11-14 02:33:11 PM
You see, this is why Obamacare is going to threaten all of us. I heard they are going to have "devocalizing" panels that are going to make decisions about taking the bark from your fluffy little fido. It will make burglarizing your house easier and is part of Lord and Master's new wealth distribution plan. That and taking all our guns so we can't protect ourselves from the raping and pillaging hoards.
/seriously.
//hey at least I didn't call him Fartbongo
 
2012-11-14 02:35:01 PM
This is why I beat my dog with a broomhandle and feed it crack mixed with gunpowder...

My husky is a Goddamn coward. When my roomate's dog barks, she hops on the couch, looks at the door, and says "You guys got this one". Her pup, a husky-chow will bark at damn near anything. Streetlights come on-Bark. People talking two streets over-Bark. Airplane flies over-Growl. She will let me know things are moving outside. Now my roomate's (2 for each of us) Rottie-Shepard...this motherfarker has a serious bark. But he never uses it for disturbances. He justs waits. Like when the mailman shoves mail through the door, he just kinda crouches down a little and is like "please come through that door". He plays rough as hell too. He likes to jump straight up so that he is eye level with you, and wrap his paws around your shoulders to see if he can bring you down.
 
2012-11-14 02:36:31 PM

nickerj1: She actually gets whiny when she sees kids outside playing cause they're her size and she wants to go run and play and dance with them.


My boy does this. Thankfully all the kids in my neighborhood are dog lovers so I'll oblige him when he really starts whining. And everybody has a fun afternoon :)
 
2012-11-14 02:37:13 PM
My 100 pound German Sheppard, Baelor the Blessed, does NOT want to play.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2012-11-14 02:37:21 PM
125 pound Rottie. He is trained to guard. He obeys VERY well.
B&E on my premises and he WILL play with you, like you are a chew-toy. Seriously.

The reason he will do this? TRAINING, lots and lots of it. Wasn't easy or cheap but he is sweet when off-point and relaxed.
But watch out for ON-POINT and in 'you-just-effed-up-and-threatened-my-human' mode.

Otherwise, he is just a big goofey, sweetipie, lick-fest on four feet. And as old as he is he will fetch that damned ball til your arms falls the fark off.
 
2012-11-14 02:38:23 PM
There was a hilarious Richard Pryor routine about his dog letting a burglar into his house... the dog's friendly and accommodating, shows where the silverware is, all that... when the burglar gets to the door, "that's when the motherfarker turned into the Exorcist.  'YOU CAN'T LEAVE!  I WANT TO PLAY!'"
 
It's funny in context, anyway.  Someone probably remembers it.
 
2012-11-14 02:38:51 PM
Getting 2 dogs. A Doberman and a German Shepherd. Haven't thought of names yet, but they must play well with hellcats.
 
2012-11-14 02:39:31 PM
We have 2 dogs, a big intimidating German Shepherd and a short, frumpy Bassett Hound. One day I got a letter from the scooper service that they would not be coming out anymore until we did something about our "aggressive dog" .

Now, I knew the Shepherd looks vicious, but I have never once seen him act it. I gave the service a call to get this hashed out.

Wasn't him. Only thing he was guilty of was pestering the scooper techs with tennis balls. But apparently every single one of them is scared to death of the Bassett. According to them she lies in ambush and goes for the back of the legs when they get close enough.

/has to go to doggie day camp on those days
//apparently her attitude improves when she isn't on "her turf"
 
2012-11-14 02:40:35 PM

Dancin_In_Anson: My Golden would not only want to play, but for a treat she'd serve up the combination to the gun safe.


Ditto. They'd get away with everying but my golden's toys.
 
2012-11-14 02:41:33 PM
My Golden/Shepard mix thinks that everybody wants to hug her. She is a great alarm but I really don't know how she would react if someone was aggressive. Hope I never have to find out.
 
2012-11-14 02:42:09 PM
Doesn't he look friendly? He is, unti you knock on the door, or get near my truck.

imageshack.us
 
2012-11-14 02:43:17 PM

Pumpernickel bread: [www.allstate.com image 235x156]
"Hey, you guys are great!"

.
Came here for Mayhem Guy.
Leaving satisfied
 
2012-11-14 02:43:32 PM
I had a basset as a teen, he was a big, floppy marshmallow. We lived 1/4 of a mile off a dirt road in the woods. One day a couple of JWs came knocking. The dog went crazy after these guys. I told them to go away, and I couldn't hold the dog back for long. once they started away, I let the dog loose. He chased them all the way down to the road barking and snarling at them. Then proudly marched back to get a cookie.

/miss that dog
 
2012-11-14 02:43:43 PM
Diito on the folks saying that just the presence of the dog is enough. We have a St. Bernard with self-esteem issues. He'll honestly just drool on anybody who visits, but the mailman won't get out of the car saying, "That dog scares the shiat out of me."
 
gja [TotalFark]
2012-11-14 02:44:26 PM

santadog: Doesn't he look friendly? He is, unti you knock on the door, or get near my truck.

[imageshack.us image 480x640]


Nice coat and coloring!
 
2012-11-14 02:46:10 PM
I had an insane cocker spaniel years ago -Barney- who thought he was ten feet tall and bulletproof. An insurance saleman stopped at the house one day; I was standing on the porch and the dog was going nuts. I warned the guy not to get out of his car unless he wanted to get bit; he thought I was bluffing.

He stepped out and Barney promptly tore the cuff off his pant leg. I just said "welp, I told ya."

The guy drove away without a word. Barney was just sitting there, wgging his little tail nub, holding the piece of pants cuff in his mouth.
 
2012-11-14 02:46:31 PM
Our miniature Schnauzers automatically hate anyone new or different ... especially children. If we're ever invaded at gunpoint by a toddler, we've got it covered.

Though, one of them tried to break through the front window one day when someone walked by on the street and our daughter was in the front yard (cracked the glass a bit but couldn't get all the way through), even though my wife was with her. Now we have to close the blinds if the kids play out front.
 
2012-11-14 02:48:09 PM

Matt Foley: tweek46420: kobrakai: Treygreen13: How my dog will react to the burglar is not the issue. It's how the burglar reacts to the dog.

Ding! Ding! Ding!
I have a black pit/lab mix who weighs about 65 lbs. He couldn't be more of a snuggly bunny if he tried but you better believe his bark and stature have helped me get rid of unwanted visitors.

yeah, I have a 85 pound boxer, who has an intimidating sound....but once you actually get in and say hello he's just an attention hound

Husky Doberman, 85 lbs. 2 seconds of chin rubs and he will show you where we keep the valuables.


103lb Doberman.... puts up a good show till you pull out the biscuit... then he'll hold the door open for you.
 
2012-11-14 02:49:23 PM

santadog: Doesn't he look friendly? He is, unti you knock on the door, or get near my truck.

[imageshack.us image 480x640]


That's a good looking Heeler.
 
2012-11-14 02:51:15 PM

santadog: Doesn't he look friendly? He is, unti you knock on the door, or get near my truck.

[imageshack.us image 480x640]


sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net

My dog would let you do this to her even if you're a complete stranger.
 
2012-11-14 02:52:16 PM

tweek46420: Dancin_In_Anson: My Golden would not only want to play, but for a treat she'd serve up the combination to the gun safe.

why did you tell the dog the combination to begin with.


Because she's a hunting dog?
 
2012-11-14 02:52:24 PM

kobrakai: Treygreen13: How my dog will react to the burglar is not the issue. It's how the burglar reacts to the dog.

Ding! Ding! Ding!
I have a black pit/lab mix who weighs about 65 lbs. He couldn't be more of a snuggly bunny if he tried but you better believe his bark and stature have helped me get rid of unwanted visitors.


Not just that. My digs are there to wake me up. My dogs might only try to lick you to death, but they're going to make one f*ck of a racket as you try to break in. They're the alarm, I'm the enforcer.
 
2012-11-14 02:54:06 PM
I dont have dogs to guard my house when I am away. I have dogs for companionship, and for backup when they show up when any of us are home. My dogs have proven to be worthless for protecting items in the house. They have also proven to be very protective of the rest of their pack against anything outside the pack. VERY protective. I would rather be shot in the gut than attacked by my two dogs, the odds would be better.
 
2012-11-14 02:54:40 PM

Skyd1v: We have 2 dogs, a big intimidating German Shepherd and a short, frumpy Bassett Hound. One day I got a letter from the scooper service that they would not be coming out anymore until we did something about our "aggressive dog" .

Now, I knew the Shepherd looks vicious, but I have never once seen him act it. I gave the service a call to get this hashed out.

Wasn't him. Only thing he was guilty of was pestering the scooper techs with tennis balls. But apparently every single one of them is scared to death of the Bassett. According to them she lies in ambush and goes for the back of the legs when they get close enough.

/has to go to doggie day camp on those days
//apparently her attitude improves when she isn't on "her turf"


Smart puppy. She deserves treats. :)
 
2012-11-14 02:56:44 PM
We have a Boston Terrier who is totally "on duty" during the day when I'm working at home. I have every confidence he would completely attack anyone who tried getting into the house while I'm here. Furnace cleaners, UPS/Mail delivery, contractors all want nothing to do with him after he gives them a good growl. Once the husband walks in the door, he immediatly looks at him as if to say "Your turn now." and off to his cuddly pillow bed to snore and fart (loudly).
 
2012-11-14 02:59:43 PM

SundaesChild: Tat'dGreaser: Wait a minute, every single thread about guns and home protection have taught me that big dogs are the only way to guard your home.

And a gun will do what for you if you don't happen to be home?


i259.photobucket.com

The same thing it would do if I was home.
 
2012-11-14 02:59:54 PM
Far from protecting things, someone once walked into the yard and stole our 100 lb. malamute. Dog just walked off with him. I look out our kitchen window and see a guy hanging onto the dog's collar as he walked away. I ran after and told him to give our dog back. He said it was his friend's dog but I said, "So your friend tied him up in our front yard?" The guy looked at me, then looked at the dog and figured with a 85 lb. 14-year old protected by a 100lb. dog, he'd probably come out on the losing side and gave him back. Our mailman loved our dog, only dog he liked on his route.
 
2012-11-14 03:00:08 PM
i877.photobucket.com
First you would have to get the door open. Then the dog would remove the body part of his choice.
My neighbor and I used to let each others dogs out if we were going to be late, until I got Jack. He refused to leave the house and wouldn't let her in. When he started growling she gave up. No matter how much we tried to convince him it was ok he refused to go along with it. He was over 2 when I got him from an animal cruelty rescue situation. He loves me and the cat and will only allow people in the house if he is on a leash and that is an improvement. He won't take food from anyone unless I tell him it's ok. He's 11 now and he's as good as he's going to get.
 
2012-11-14 03:00:12 PM
I don't have a dog, so I have no idea how it would react. My cat...When that back door got kicked in Monday, he apparently ran to the back bedroom upstairs and hid in a corner under my computer table.

/I have still told him I am proud of him and that he scared off the big bad man.
//The theif was really scared off by the 25 year old tv set. Old stuff apparently has a good place in life.
///didn't loose anything, but the idiot then tried the neighbor's apartment, they were home, they got a good look at him. Hopefully the police will catch him
 
2012-11-14 03:01:10 PM

ha-ha-guy: It all depends, I had a malamute who was a giant baby, right up until a burglar tried to break into my house via the window right next to the crib. The dog was stabbed by the burglar's knife and needed stitches, the burglar was found by the police a block or so away, passed out behind a small shed from lack of blood (the cops just followed the blood trail).

I don't care if my dog won't protect the flat screen when I'm not home, after all I have home owners insurance and I'd rather not have some dog prone to overreacting when people come onto his territory. What I do what is a dog that will fark shiat up when I'm not home, but my wife and six month old son are.

Basically my malamute was unhappy about the whole "strange man comes through window next to baby" thing and the moment my wife screamed he went from unhappy to "you know what solves all kinds of problems? Biting this dude repeatedly." When no one is around, he's welcome to help the guy load the TV for all I and my 750 dollar deductible care.

/the day the dog came back from the animal hospital he limped over to the easy chair by the window the burglar came through, sat down behind it and locked his eyes on the window, ready for round two


I think we found out who's a good boy.
 
2012-11-14 03:02:15 PM
German Shepherd - 85 pounds of hidey hole cowardice till you mess with one of her people...
 
2012-11-14 03:03:09 PM

FarknGroovn: kisseswookies: My dog takes that as her sign to run in the opposite direction as fast as she can.

My shar-pei consistently runs away from threats as fast as possible in the completely opposite direction. If I want to see what may be in my yard all I have to do is walk directly opposite his path when he bolts.

So far the list of things he consistently run from:
Geese
Ducks
Rabbits
Deer - Scary to run into these guys at 5:00 AM...
Coyotes - I usually run with him on this one...
Skunks - he got sprayed once. Safe to say he did not like it.
People

He's like a reverse tracking hound.


To be fair, I run from geese too.
/Terrifying creatures.
 
2012-11-14 03:03:38 PM
We had a German Shepherd cross that we got from a pound as a puppy. We did not know when we got him that he took guarding the home far more seriously than we ever wanted him to. I actually think he remembered the pound and treasured the whole house as his safe place. He never cared much for anyone on the sidewalk outside, but as soon as he heard the difference in sound a footfall made between our walk and the sidewalk, he got, well, mad. Fortunately he listened to us and if we let someone in, Bear was a big baby to them within an hour, but anyone trying to break into the house or yard probably would be missing a limb before they got away.

One summer I had a military posting I had to do and my wife broke her ankle and couldn't look after Bear when I was gone. He went to my mother in law's who felt bad that he was in a new house and actually slept on the couch with him. If he thought he was spoiled at home, he just hit the jackpot. He also defended her house against the meter reader and bit him on the ass pretty good. Fortunately he wasn't hurt (good thing for thick jackets) and the meter reader promised to knock first the next time he came.

i317.photobucket.com

I miss ya, big guy.

/current shelties in the house are useless
 
2012-11-14 03:08:04 PM
The problem is in today's world a true guard dog is likely to get put down for an incident. In order to function in our society dogs instincts to protect really need to be trained out of them for the most part. However dogs are still very valuable in a watch dog role. Even most gentle and loving dogs will make a lot of noise when someone, particularly someone unfamiliar enters the home.

Also dogs are often better at seizing people up than we realize. If this guy really meant no harm the dogs probably picked up on that and treated him differently than they would an actual burglar who would most likely be putting off an air of more hostility and aggression.
 
2012-11-14 03:08:07 PM
What it all comes down to is whether you want to pay after someone gets randomly bitten or pay for proper training.
Like some have pointed out, having an aggressive dog in typical small to mid sized neighbourhood is rather impractical. An area with kids as part of the normal landscape? even worse.

The last option is patient and proper training done by yourself which can be time consuming or poorly done. I doubt a majority of Dog owners based on my random sampling know more than rudimentary training techniques for dogs.

In short, having a dog bark and not more when strangers approach is quite acceptable in most cases.

Now, if you live in a well fenced unsafe area, I prefer the "Martial Law/Curfew" type of dog.
 
2012-11-14 03:09:16 PM

EatHam: meat0918: I've only ever been bit by small dogs.

Big dogs warn you.


That's a fact.

The minpin didn't even growl, he just snapped at me.

The bichon was decades ago, and he came out of nowhere as I was walking back to the sidewalk delivering papers. I don't remember if he warned me at all.
 
2012-11-14 03:09:47 PM
A friend's CSB. She was home when a pesky salesman came to the door and wouldn't leave. She finally got nervous and fed up. Called the rottweiler's name and the dog reacted to her nervous tone of voice and came flying from the back room growling. Salesman was all elbows and assholes. This was the first time she had ever seen the dog react this way, a big lover usually.
 
2012-11-14 03:12:28 PM

suthrnrunt: Matt Foley: tweek46420: kobrakai: Treygreen13: Husky Doberman, 85 lbs. 2 seconds of chin rubs and he will show you where we keep the valuables.

103lb Doberman.... puts up a good show till you pull out the biscuit... then he'll hold the door open for you.


80 lb. 1 year old Doberman, on his way to 100lbs. Looks the part, sounds the part, but I'm glad I don't own much of anything worth stealing.

Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: "Hey! Hey! You! There's food in the fridge! Can I have food? Hey! You with the TV! Can I have food? Food! In the fridge! The food! The fridge! Food!"

My guard critter can be defeated with 4 dollars worth of sliced ham from the grocery store.


Aaaand this ^
 
2012-11-14 03:13:25 PM
When someone comes to the door, I let the dogs go up and bark while I see who it is, also letting them see what they would deal with if they are caseing the place. 2 Irish Wolfhounds, 2 Jack Russells, and a Chuhuahua (that the Wolfhounds are convinced is their puppy). Its comical watching the power co. guys check to see if the yard is safe to come into.

If you leave them alone, they probably won't do anything to you. Hit/hurt one, and you are on your own and may God have mercy on your soul. I'll be right behind them with something to end the pain.
 
2012-11-14 03:17:22 PM
Well it depends on the vibe of the intruder. If you walk in like you own the place, dogs will generally think you own the place. If you're skittish or aggressive, they're going to give it back to you.
 
2012-11-14 03:18:24 PM

ha-ha-guy: It all depends, I had a malamute who was a giant baby, right up until a burglar tried to break into my house via the window right next to the crib. The dog was stabbed by the burglar's knife and needed stitches, the burglar was found by the police a block or so away, passed out behind a small shed from lack of blood (the cops just followed the blood trail).

I don't care if my dog won't protect the flat screen when I'm not home, after all I have home owners insurance and I'd rather not have some dog prone to overreacting when people come onto his territory. What I do what is a dog that will fark shiat up when I'm not home, but my wife and six month old son are.

Basically my malamute was unhappy about the whole "strange man comes through window next to baby" thing and the moment my wife screamed he went from unhappy to "you know what solves all kinds of problems? Biting this dude repeatedly." When no one is around, he's welcome to help the guy load the TV for all I and my 750 dollar deductible care.

/the day the dog came back from the animal hospital he limped over to the easy chair by the window the burglar came through, sat down behind it and locked his eyes on the window, ready for round two


Your dog deserves a big gotdamn steak
 
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