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(KEZ 99.9)   You ever been too drunk to figure out an escalator?   (kez999.com) divider line 41
    More: Fail, Beth, full house, Cirque du Soleil, President Nicolas Sarkozy  
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6571 clicks; posted to Video » on 14 Nov 2012 at 2:17 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



41 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-11-14 11:18:47 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2012-11-14 12:57:08 PM
has subby ever been too drunk to link the article and not the site's main page?
 
2012-11-14 01:14:38 PM
No, but I once found a buddy standing on a staircase bombed off his ass who told me he was on the slowest escalator he'd ever been on in his life.
 
2012-11-14 02:22:13 PM
please post escalator up-skirt pics so I can add to my collection
 
2012-11-14 02:24:22 PM
Alcohol and pedestrian bridge escalators are a leading cause of tourist deaths here in Las Vegas.

Seriously.

One week two years ago when I was working at the Palazzo, two drunk morons killed themselves trying to surf down an escalator handrails a day apart.
 
2012-11-14 02:27:43 PM
Meh,

mushrooms and crossing four lanes of traffic...
 
2012-11-14 02:31:34 PM
being oriental maybe they run backwards on the other end of the world.
 
2012-11-14 02:34:31 PM
Haven't been that drunk but I once went up a side elevator at the Bellagio after getting tanked at a sales banquet and got so turned around I couldn't find my room. I had to reboard the side elevator, take it back down to the main floor, walk back through the casino to the main elevator, and take it to my room instead, all the while waiting for casino security to nab me for being as drunk as I was.

/was a sales conference rookie cutting loose since having my first kidlette
//still don't know how I made it to my room without tossing my cookies
/casino security was probably just snickering at me
 
2012-11-14 02:44:19 PM
I once was drunk enough to miss the elevator and take the stairs right next to it.
 
2012-11-14 02:56:09 PM

Cuthbert Allgood: Meh,

mushrooms and crossing four lanes of traffic...


Got you beat

Magic mushroom smoothie

1.bp.blogspot.com

Then wondering into traffic in Bali

us.123rf.com 

Not dying is considered winning,
 
2012-11-14 02:57:42 PM
At a work conference earlier this year my associates and myself were drunk enough that we needed help from a notorious drunk colleague staying at a completely different hotel. Both elevators had the same "ostrich" skin padding, but we needed to somehow make it to the 15th floor in an elevator that stopped at... 6? We had ended up in a Marriott, across the street from our own Marriott. He himself was staying a different hotel down the street and somehow ended up there so he was probably more drunk than us, but still sober enough to explain we needed to walk across the street...

/csb
 
2012-11-14 03:12:02 PM

Dead for Tax Reasons: has subby ever been too drunk to link the article and not the site's main page?


img.photobucket.com
 
2012-11-14 03:15:33 PM
I think he was just exercising.
 
2012-11-14 03:22:01 PM
HoboCop:

I think he was just exercising.

Yeah, like a treadmill. Only free!
 
2012-11-14 03:41:22 PM
I've seen someone too stoned to handle a spiral staircase...
 
2012-11-14 03:50:41 PM
Guy looks Korean. They love their alcohol but can't really handle it (in my experience). Oddly, the general myth of asians being genetically unable to "handle" alcohol is almost entirely backward. In fact, many asians can actually metabolise alcohol *more* efficiently than westerners, but for the annoying side effects (e.g. flushing) from the rapid buildup of acetaldehyde caused by their more efficient metabolism.
 
2012-11-14 04:01:14 PM

Kanemano: Got you beat


Yes you do.
 
2012-11-14 04:13:31 PM
Subby, the answer is "yes."

Anything else on your mind? 'Cos I'm here all day.
 
2012-11-14 04:16:31 PM
Figure one out? Hell, ever been too drunk to win a fight against one?

/drunk enough to fight one is implied in the question.
 
2012-11-14 04:23:56 PM

Dead for Tax Reasons: has subby ever been too drunk to link the article and not the site's main page?


I think some moron at the radio station is doing this. This is the third time I've seen that site, I remember the botoxed harpy on the left's photo, and they always just link to the page as opposed to the blog post. By the time it goes green, the referenced video is two or three posts down. Someone is just trying to drive traffic. Any normal Farker would just link right to Youtube I assume.

/I should stop clicking on them
 
2012-11-14 04:31:26 PM
No, but I couldn't figure out that page. What a mess.
 
2012-11-14 04:31:27 PM
Somebody just pull that big red stop switch and let him walk down.

/Then turn it back on as he nears the bottom ;)
 
2012-11-14 04:35:41 PM
yes I have, but I wasn't actually near an escalator at the time.
 
2012-11-14 04:56:51 PM

Coelacanth: One week two years ago when I was working at the Palazzo, two drunk morons killed themselves trying to surf down an escalator handrails a day apart.


I kinda did that on a staircase... I'd been drinking heavily for about 12 hours or so, it was a friend's going away party, and it was set to end when a bunch of drunks dropped her off at the airport.

Anyway, my second or third trip down, I had two medium sized duffel bags, so I put one in each hand and tried to slide down the handrails of an outside staircase. About 2/3 of the way down, I stumbled, and launched myself to the ground, landing almost exclusively on my chin. I convinced my friend that was leaving that I was OK, or she would have missed her flight, even though she had no way personally to get me to the hospital. Unfortunately, she was the last one out of her apartment, and when I went to find the inevitable person or two who had decided that the airport wasn't a good idea, I realized that EVERYONE had left. I'd knocked a tooth out, broken another in half, and a third was filled with spiderweb cracks. I was completely disoriented, and was just about to break down and call an ambulance for myself when one person showed up super late fr the party. Of course, HE wasn't the best option, as he basically drove up to the ER, stopped the car and said 'good luck'...

Haven't done something that stupid ever again.
 
2012-11-14 04:57:59 PM

oryx: No, but I couldn't figure out that page. What a mess.


Jesus, it's like the third story down, click on the video. I agree that it's a horrible page, but if you can't figure out that page at this point in the internet's history, you must be as drunk as this guy seemed.
 
2012-11-14 05:03:03 PM

ha-ha-guy: Dead for Tax Reasons: has subby ever been too drunk to link the article and not the site's main page?

I think some moron at the radio station is doing this. This is the third time I've seen that site, I remember the botoxed harpy on the left's photo, and they always just link to the page as opposed to the blog post. By the time it goes green, the referenced video is two or three posts down. Someone is just trying to drive traffic. Any normal Farker would just link right to Youtube I assume.

/I should stop clicking on them


Mikey1969: oryx: No, but I couldn't figure out that page. What a mess.

Jesus, it's like the third story down, click on the video. I agree that it's a horrible page, but if you can't figure out that page at this point in the internet's history, you must be as drunk as this guy seemed.


Not sure if she's botoxed. She looks almost exactly the same as she did back around the mid-90's. Older, but no obvious botox.
 
2012-11-14 05:05:13 PM
I saw someone too drunk to handle the slope on a curb, where the cutout is at the crosswalk, the dude stumbled up and stumbled back 3 or 4 times before the light finally changed and I went on my way. Absolutely hilarious.
 
2012-11-14 05:21:50 PM
One time I got so drunk I turned into an Asian man who didn't understand English.
 
2012-11-14 06:05:23 PM

Coelacanth: Alcohol and pedestrian bridge escalators are a leading cause of tourist deaths here in Las Vegas.

Seriously.

One week two years ago when I was working at the Palazzo, two drunk morons killed themselves trying to surf down an escalator handrails a day apart.


I'm not too surprised... I had the same idea when I was wasted in Vegas. I was smart enough/not drunk enough to actually try it... But the thought crossed my mind.
 
2012-11-14 06:23:17 PM
WHY IS THE HEADLINE JUDGING ME!?
 
2012-11-14 06:53:56 PM
I tripped over a half inch curb while drunk and a little high. Scraped the fark out of my right ankle and leg, while my buddy burst his diaphragm laughing his arse off.

/CSB
 
2012-11-14 08:06:19 PM
I just remember the pizza bites at this party being incredible. I parked myself next to them until the fire extinguisher went off. Good times...
 
2012-11-14 08:25:10 PM
I've been drunk enough to start shiat with the cops, run away, then end up running towards a different set of cops because I couldn't remember where my hotel was.

/they gave me a ride to my hotel
//without beating my ass
///they deserve a raise
 
2012-11-14 08:33:36 PM
i was once too drunk to operate an elevator. a buddy was getting married out of state, so a bunch of us got rooms in the same hotel. on the bottom floor, somebody rented out a massive suite and we spent all night partying there the night before the wedding. when i finally left, i managed to stagger down the hall and around the corner to the lobby. i got into the elevator and just stood there, maybe a good five minutes. i couldn't figure out why the door wasn't opening to let me off. then it occurred to me that i had never pushed a button and the elevator hadn't moved.

i remembered what floor i was on and finally made it there, but then i couldn't remember what room i was in. i walked down the hall stopping at each door. i faced the door and stared really hard at the room number, hoping that it would look familiar (the "i'll know it when i see it mentality). after a half dozen or so doors, one of the room numbers looked right. i tried my key, and luckily the door opened and it was the right room.

my completely sober and pregnant wife, who had been waiting for a couple hours for me to finally come back to the room, was not very impressed.
 
2012-11-14 08:54:42 PM

CCCarnie: I'm not too surprised... I had the same idea when I was wasted in Vegas. I was smart enough/not drunk enough to actually try it... But the thought crossed my mind.


Dude, there's nothing as sobering as washing brains off the sidewalk with a hose. Thank you for listening to your commonsense.
 
2012-11-14 10:38:11 PM
is it racist that I wasn't surprised this dude was asian?
 
2012-11-15 12:05:24 AM
It's like an insect trying to fly through a window and it just doesn't get it that it's not getting anywhere
 
2012-11-15 05:57:24 AM
Great exercise. Combines the benefits of a treadmill and a stairmaster...
 
2012-11-15 08:27:05 AM
Have never been drunk.. and seeing people like this guy will make sure i will never have a drink in my life. I don't understand why you would want to be like that at all
 
2012-11-15 08:46:42 AM
That's fake. A professional drunk would have face planted way before that.
 
2012-11-15 10:59:08 PM

Icetech3: Have never been drunk.. and seeing people like this guy will make sure i will never have a drink in my life. I don't understand why you would want to be like that at all


More booze for the rest of us!
 
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