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(Huffington Post)   If you're going to blow the whistle on an adulterous relationship with a senior government official, you might want to make sure you aren't running a major cancer charity scam at the same time. We're looking at you, Jill "Catfight" Kelley   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 195
    More: Followup, CIA Director David Petraeus, Assistant Secretary of State, tax forms, u.s. central command, Dodd-Frank Wall Street Reform and Consumer Protection Act, Brendan Smialowski, kelley, Yoshiaki Iwasaki  
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16575 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Nov 2012 at 11:53 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-11-14 12:29:23 PM
fluffy2097
"The CIA wants to read my e-mail without a warrant but gets upset when their director gets caught having affairs via e-mail."

Lost in the hoopla ^THIS^ is all I'll remember.

Now, someone explain to me how Congress exempting themselves from the Affordable Care Act isn't part and parcel of the same horseshiat thinking.
 
2012-11-14 12:29:49 PM

Generation_D: How you act when no-one's looking tells a lot.


Boy howdy.
 
2012-11-14 12:30:03 PM

factoryconnection: Generation_D: requoted for emphasis.

A delightful coincidence, but not one that snuck past me.

Rapmaster2000: Mind blown. That's farking it.

No, no, no... if she was a Madam she'd be making some serious coin, not broke and immersed in debt although not as badly as her twin sister. The silver S500 and her look would work for a high-class Madam but the financials don't make sense.


Maybe business has been bad. I mean, we are in a recession...
 
2012-11-14 12:30:13 PM
Has anybody seen or heard the 9-11 transcript wherein she claimed diplomatic inviolability to the police when the media locusts were mobbing her yard?

Oh yes, it's true.
Money wasn't the motive here.
Some people get off on mixing with the powerful for its own sake.
You know, the social crowd. Country club crowd.
 
2012-11-14 12:31:13 PM

CapeFearCadaver: factoryconnection: Generation_D: requoted for emphasis.

A delightful coincidence, but not one that snuck past me.

Rapmaster2000: Mind blown. That's farking it.

No, no, no... if she was a Madam she'd be making some serious coin, not broke and immersed in debt although not as badly as her twin sister. The silver S500 and her look would work for a high-class Madam but the financials don't make sense.

Maybe business has been bad. I mean, we are in a recession...


And these guys are on a government salary. They aren't bankers.
 
2012-11-14 12:31:16 PM

Zeb Hesselgresser: Now, someone explain to me how Congress exempting themselves from the Affordable Care Act isn't part and parcel of the same horseshiat thinking.


Say what? No way.
 
2012-11-14 12:31:37 PM

GrizzlyPouch: NowhereMon: She sounds like most of the country club Republicans I know: living spectacularly beyond their means, up to their ears in debt, marital infidelity is the norm, and willing to do almost anything to keep up appearances. Permeating all of this is the attitude that they are better than the unwashed lower classes (even though their net worth is less than most people on welfare) and that the rules that apply to everyone else do not apply to them. To hobnob with public figure of note, a general or a politician is like a wet dream, a confirmation of the fantasy that they are someone.

Losers, all of them.

Petraeus should have known better than to get mixed up in all of that.

How is it that you've come to know all this about these people?

Are you a psychic? A wizard?

O right you're just pulling shiat out your ass


I think he meant that he knows people like this biatch - owes a crap ton of money but puts on fabulous parties, only wears designers clothes and drive expensive cars. If so, I also know several people like this and it is hard to feel sorry for them when they crash and burn from years of overspending.
 
2012-11-14 12:33:06 PM

bunner: While the origins of the seed money used to start the charity in 2007 are unclear, financial records reviewed by The Huffington Post reveal that the group spent all of its money not on research, but on parties, entertainment, travel and attorney fees.


I see no problem with this. An attorney is a necessity when you're about to be facing eviction, bankruptcy, criminal charges and a probable divorce.

*cough*
 
2012-11-14 12:34:51 PM

HotIgneous Intruder: I_C_Weener: And yet I can't get Top Secret clearance.

Exactly this.

I got all altruistic the other day after watching the hurricane cleanup and went over to USAJOBS to surf around. I found a motor vehicle operator job at FEMA that required the candidate to be able to perform janitorial skills, paid something like $17 bucks an hour, and required a Top Secret clearance.
Very funny and just another reason we're farked.

/I won't ever qualify for a clearance for various reasons, not the least of which is that I'm not an authoritarian follower.


That is really the way the government contracting industry preserves their income. They have the connections and contracts to DO the clearances. Regular people can't get them. Join a contractor group and the problems disappear. Even with a checkered history.
 
2012-11-14 12:35:21 PM

lelio: NowhereMon: Petraeus should have known better than to get mixed up in all of that.

This will all make sense when it is revealed that Jill is actually a Madam. You think that military men want to go to parties in "high society" Tampa for the conversation?


I wonder if the Madam is a front for an intelligence gathering operation.

/but I'm like that
 
2012-11-14 12:36:49 PM
Bad white people being bad.
 
2012-11-14 12:37:42 PM
Oh, sure. Like you can embezzle enough to support an extravagant lifestyle from a *legit* charity that's living off donations from people on government paychecks.
Let's be real here, folks.
 
2012-11-14 12:38:11 PM

Koalaesq: Diogenes: I think the most important question at this point is which one will Susan Lucci play?

Pretty sure George Wendt will play Mrs. Patreus


O.O AWESOME!!!!
 
2012-11-14 12:38:54 PM

factoryconnection: Generation_D: requoted for emphasis.

A delightful coincidence, but not one that snuck past me.

Rapmaster2000: Mind blown. That's farking it.

No, no, no... if she was a Madam she'd be making some serious coin, not broke and immersed in debt although not as badly as her twin sister. The silver S500 and her look would work for a high-class Madam but the financials don't make sense.


so... she's a spy?
 
2012-11-14 12:39:22 PM

factoryconnection: Generation_D: requoted for emphasis.

A delightful coincidence, but not one that snuck past me.

Rapmaster2000: Mind blown. That's farking it.

No, no, no... if she was a Madam she'd be making some serious coin, not broke and immersed in debt although not as badly as her twin sister. The silver S500 and her look would work for a high-class Madam but the financials don't make sense.


The financials will probably come to light in offshore accounts.
 
2012-11-14 12:40:09 PM

Wild Eyed and Wicked: GrizzlyPouch: NowhereMon: She sounds like most of the country club Republicans I know: living spectacularly beyond their means, up to their ears in debt, marital infidelity is the norm, and willing to do almost anything to keep up appearances. Permeating all of this is the attitude that they are better than the unwashed lower classes (even though their net worth is less than most people on welfare) and that the rules that apply to everyone else do not apply to them. To hobnob with public figure of note, a general or a politician is like a wet dream, a confirmation of the fantasy that they are someone.

Losers, all of them.

Petraeus should have known better than to get mixed up in all of that.

How is it that you've come to know all this about these people?

Are you a psychic? A wizard?

O right you're just pulling shiat out your ass

I think he meant that he knows people like this biatch - owes a crap ton of money but puts on fabulous parties, only wears designers clothes and drive expensive cars. If so, I also know several people like this and it is hard to feel sorry for them when they crash and burn from years of overspending. sticking their dicks in crazy.

 
2012-11-14 12:40:34 PM

Generation_D: Why is the head of our armed forces and CIA palling around with these bimbos.

How you act when no-one's looking tells a lot.


www.washingtonpost.com

\GIS for 'palling around'
 
2012-11-14 12:45:18 PM

fluffy2097: The CIA wants to read my e-mail without a warrant but gets upset when their director gets caught having affairs via e-mail.


To be fair, it's probably the NSA reading your e-mail, not the CIA.
 
2012-11-14 12:45:24 PM
Dammit, well, at the speed this mess is unraveling, I better come clean now before everyone hears about it on the news.

I was actually romantically involved with not only Broadwell and Kelley, but also with General Petraeus' bag-girl (kind of like a bagman for the mob, but she just carries cash from one fake charity to another) as well as recently outed Microsoft Exec Steven Sinofsky and his team of Hungarian Lavatory slaves. In addition, I served as part of the conduit passing messages from Allen (Paul Allen at Microsoft, not that other general dude) to his handlers in the Cirque del Soleil (who I believe are in fact a front for the International Monetary Fund) and handled instructions for his currency launderers in Zaire, Togo and Santa Fe. While I was never part of the actual conspiracy itself, I did receive a ceremonial back rub from a masked, naked Karl Rove and was instructed in the Hidden Secrets and told what was actually buried in Steve Job's tomb. I also baked a cake for Helen Thomas, but that was just for her birthday and wasn't really connected to anything else.

Wow, I really feel better after getting that off my chest.
 
2012-11-14 12:46:04 PM
Yeah, I'm OK with this story just going away now. Fire that idiot Allen, and the FBI agent, then forget completely the two dumb biatches who apparently started all this. No book deals, no talk show appearances, none of it. Maybe rendition is an option here. I can't think of a better reason to use it.
 
2012-11-14 12:47:12 PM

factoryconnection: KatjaMouse: If you were to pitch this whole thing to a Hollywood exec he'd shoot you down as there's no way the audience could suspend their disbelief for it.

I just hope that when they make this into a movie, they go with hilarious Schadenfreude-spewing satire instead of Lifetime melodrama.


George Clooney as Patreaus?
 
2012-11-14 12:48:06 PM

Paris1127: Diogenes: I think the most important question at this point is which one will Susan Lucci play?

[thebiglead.fantasysportsven.netdna-cdn.com image 640x426]

Broadwell?


minor threadjack:

Lucci would have to be force fed and gain 20 lbs or more to even get close to playing either one. Not at all insinuating that these women are fatties, it's just Lucci is scary thin now, just jutting bones and not-so-stretched skin.

/threadjack
 
2012-11-14 12:48:36 PM
Beyond her hosting efforts, The Washington Post reports that, according to a military officer who served on Gen. Petraeus' staff, Kelley was a "'self-appointed' go-between for Central Command officers with Lebanese and other Middle Eastern government officials."

OK.. this is a bit disconcerting!

Why is this woman a liaison between CentCom and Mid East countries?
 
2012-11-14 12:49:18 PM

toraque: Dammit, well, at the speed this mess is unraveling, I better come clean now before everyone hears about it on the news.

I was actually romantically involved with not only Broadwell and Kelley, but also with General Petraeus' bag-girl (kind of like a bagman for the mob, but she just carries cash from one fake charity to another) as well as recently outed Microsoft Exec Steven Sinofsky and his team of Hungarian Lavatory slaves. In addition, I served as part of the conduit passing messages from Allen (Paul Allen at Microsoft, not that other general dude) to his handlers in the Cirque del Soleil (who I believe are in fact a front for the International Monetary Fund) and handled instructions for his currency launderers in Zaire, Togo and Santa Fe. While I was never part of the actual conspiracy itself, I did receive a ceremonial back rub from a masked, naked Karl Rove and was instructed in the Hidden Secrets and told what was actually buried in Steve Job's tomb. I also baked a cake for Helen Thomas, but that was just for her birthday and wasn't really connected to anything else.

Wow, I really feel better after getting that off my chest.


Whatever you do, don't answer the door. Try to get to one of these locations.
 
2012-11-14 12:49:47 PM

SuperNinjaToad: Beyond her hosting efforts, The Washington Post reports that, according to a military officer who served on Gen. Petraeus' staff, Kelley was a "'self-appointed' go-between for Central Command officers with Lebanese and other Middle Eastern government officials."

OK.. this is a bit disconcerting!

Why is this woman a liaison between CentCom and Mid East countries?


Holy shiat
 
2012-11-14 12:51:28 PM

SuperNinjaToad: Beyond her hosting efforts, The Washington Post reports that, according to a military officer who served on Gen. Petraeus' staff, Kelley was a "'self-appointed' go-between for Central Command officers with Lebanese and other Middle Eastern government officials."

OK.. this is a bit disconcerting!

Why is this woman a liaison between CentCom and Mid East countries?


Why is she an "honorary consul" for the South Korean government?

/did she hit it Gangnam style?
 
2012-11-14 12:52:33 PM

The Gordie Howe Hat Trick: Holy shiat


"Self-appointed".

She was just trying to matter, playing the hostess. Introducing some people at a cocktail party isn't scary in and of itself, no matter where they're from.
 
2012-11-14 12:54:18 PM

Pocket Ninja: I think we've reached the Boat Point of this story, which is the point at which the entire thing has become so ridiculous that the only rational solution remaining is to gather everyone even tangentially involved, put them on a boat, sail it out into the middle of the Pacific, and sink it. Sink it deep.


The STORY is ridiculous.

The Lebonese-American "Socialite" who has all kinds of reasons to be going into the Army command center that have nothing at all to do with any kind of operations.

And who has all kinds of connections to the head of the CIA and the commander of forces in Afghanistan...

And who keeps a phoney charity that doesn't take in or spend any money but pays for travel for "Cancer patients"

I'm sure it Doesn't Involve Anything important.
 
2012-11-14 12:55:06 PM
i208.photobucket.com

i208.photobucket.com 

Nice to see that TDS participated (albeit late) in our thread yesterday.
 
2012-11-14 12:55:07 PM
I like the part where she calls 911 and asks for diplomatic immunity.
 
2012-11-14 12:56:43 PM

The Gordie Howe Hat Trick: jgilb: Generation_D: Why is the head of our armed forces and CIA palling around with these bimbos.

How you act when no-one's looking tells a lot.

Maybe we need to stop worshiping the military and start treating them as just another government employee.

Given that "everybody" seems to think that military service is no different than working 9-5 for xyz corps and the same standards should be applied.why not?

The military is no longer a profession it is a job corps for single parents

/Single parents and pregnant service members have undermined military readiness and morale more than the gays ever will.

 
2012-11-14 12:56:43 PM
And goddammit Generals, you forget the axiom: "New pussy can't cook."
 
2012-11-14 12:57:49 PM
"The official South Korean news agency Yonhap reports that Kelley had "good connections and network and a willingness to develop Korea-U.S. relations, including the free trade agreement between the two nations."

South Korean officials tell CNN that "an honorary consul can generally play a role of promoting trade and economic cooperation between the two countries...."

Practically all the socialite military and Government wives in Tampa have those.
No big deal. Nothing to see here. Move along citizen.
 
2012-11-14 12:57:58 PM

Ambitwistor: fluffy2097: The CIA wants to read my e-mail without a warrant but gets upset when their director gets caught having affairs via e-mail.

To be fair, it's probably the NSA reading your e-mail, not the CIA.


Domestically it would be the FBI. For foreign farkers it would be either NSA or CIA.
 
2012-11-14 12:58:54 PM

Sybarite: Well none of this would be an issue if Petraeus hadn't stuck his dick in crazy.


Violated the fundimental rule.

Probably farks locals, too.
 
2012-11-14 12:59:57 PM

Rent Party: Ambitwistor: fluffy2097: The CIA wants to read my e-mail without a warrant but gets upset when their director gets caught having affairs via e-mail.

To be fair, it's probably the NSA reading your e-mail, not the CIA.

Domestically it would be the FBI. For foreign farkers it would be either NSA or CIA.


I thought it was Frank Stallone.
 
2012-11-14 12:59:59 PM

Rent Party: Ambitwistor: fluffy2097: The CIA wants to read my e-mail without a warrant but gets upset when their director gets caught having affairs via e-mail.

To be fair, it's probably the NSA reading your e-mail, not the CIA.

Domestically it would be the FBI. For foreign farkers it would be either NSA or CIA.


they're all under the DHS umbrella now. Not that it matters much.
 
2012-11-14 01:00:09 PM

Rent Party: Domestically it would be the FBI. For foreign farkers it would be either NSA or CIA.


They all share data anyways

Not to mention the CIA is going to be spying on any packets leaving the USA...
 
2012-11-14 01:00:43 PM

dofus: I like the part where she calls 911 and asks for diplomatic immunity.


Protection -- not immunity.

Diplomatic Immunity isn't the Active term here. 

It's like she thinks she has some special status she isn't telling anybody about but thinks they will take action on anyway.
 
2012-11-14 01:01:45 PM
Did any of you hear the 911 transcript where this biatch invoked diplomatic immunity and then Danny Glover said "It's just been revoked" and shot her in the head?
 
2012-11-14 01:03:29 PM

SoupJohnB: This shiat never happened to Bond.

/James


That's mainly because every woman he porks gets killed by reel four.
 
2012-11-14 01:04:26 PM
I call it "The Aristocrats!"
 
2012-11-14 01:05:21 PM

OhioKnight: dofus: I like the part where she calls 911 and asks for diplomatic immunity.

Protection -- not immunity.

Diplomatic Immunity isn't the Active term here. 

It's like she thinks she has some special status she isn't telling anybody about but thinks they will take action on anyway.


Shes a Denver International Airport employee? Damn, that's where the U.S. has their secret underground base too.

/When I lived in Denver I once talked to a customer service person on the phone and when I told her my location she asked me about the aforementioned secret base
 
2012-11-14 01:06:18 PM

HotIgneous Intruder: lelio: HotIgneous Intruder: required the candidate to be able to perform janitorial skills, paid something like $17 bucks an hour, and required a Top Secret clearance.

This type of job is for the moron ex-military office and worker brother in law of someone that manages the joint. Why look we only have one applicant for this job so we have to hire him!

Exactly what I was thinking.
Dumb Cousin Earle who wiped down missiles in the Army has a good gubmint job for life now.


Or more often n soon to be retired officer recommends that his position (administration, personnel, staff REMF types most often) be converted to civil service and of course he his the best/only person qualified to fill it. So he retires from military and starts collecting a civil service check as well as his military retirement check,

Eventually he/she will end up collecting a retirement check form the military , a retirement check from civil service and social security.
 
2012-11-14 01:07:04 PM

gunther_bumpass: SoupJohnB: This shiat never happened to Bond.

/James

That's mainly because every woman he porks gets killed by reel four.


At least they go out in style

www.rickmcginnis.com
 
2012-11-14 01:07:22 PM

cryinoutloud: Crazy narcissistic biatch, and probably so is Broadwell. You'd think that highly ranked military guys would have some training in avoiding people like this, but oh no, psychology is bullshiat--they're generals and they control the world. They have the weapons of mass destruction and the power to use them.

Well, they both just got a lesson in those little weapons of mass destruction--crazy people. Ruining everything, one person at a time. And then they (usually) just walk away.

/Why yes, I do have some trust issues


I agree with you except the part about "the power to use them." Usually some form of authorization is necessary to use WMDs. Everything else you said is SPOT ON.
 
2012-11-14 01:07:26 PM
Based on her reported profile, Kelley seems like a third-rate Kardashian.
 
2012-11-14 01:07:34 PM
" Mrs Kelley, a 37-year-old Tampa socialite who hosted parties for the nation´s top brass, has been told today that she is no longer welcome at military HQ near her Florida home..."


It is a sad day when unpaid social liason milfs cannot just freely wander through the high echelons on military bases. What have we come to as a nation ?

What are they going to do there now, just military stuff?

....that's crazy
 
2012-11-14 01:10:16 PM
Thieving twat
 
2012-11-14 01:12:44 PM
There's still MILF Porn. She'll have to change her name though.

graphics8.nytimes.com
 
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